When Wendy Sterling’s 16-year marriage was coming to an end, she struggled to wrap her mind around it. She had lost herself in her marriage. She had lost her voice, her independence, and her identity. Not only was the life she had planned falling apart, but so was the image of herself that she had carefully created.
Yet in spite of her heartbreak and turmoil, Wendy realized her divorce was a chance at a fresh start.
“My divorce enabled me to finally see that it was time for me to start taking charge of my own life, to start finding myself again. And it was an opportunity for me to really start over,” Wendy says.
On this episode of Divorce, Healthy!, Wendy discusses her own healing process and The Divorce Rehab™ program, which offers clients both one-on-one coaching and group programs.
“Like many others, I was the first of all of my friends [to get divorced]. I didn't have any support at the time. And so one of the big things that was a priority for me was really getting a community together of like-minded women who can rely on one another,” Wendy says.
Though no one intends for it to happen, divorce is a reality. Wendy sees to it that healing is possible in spite of it all.
Tune in to this episode of Divorce! Healthy with Ashley-Nicole Russell, Collaborative Attorney serving Beaufort, Raleigh, and Greenville, NC.
Name: Wendy Sterling
What she does: Wendy is divorce coach, author, speaker, and host of The Divorced Woman's Guide podcast. She is also the mother of two boys and has firsthand experience about the nonlinear post-divorce healing process.
Words of wisdom: “My mission is really to change the conversation of divorce — to change the stigma to be one of power, instead of one of shame.”
Top takeaways from this Divorce, Healthy! episode
★ Rethink divorce as a new beginning. Divorce is often stigmatized as a purely negative thing — and a sign of failure. Rethinking it and what it means to have a fresh start can help the healing process.
★ Rediscover yourself after divorce. Divorce presents an opportunity to invest in your personal identity. Oftentimes, people get lost in their marriages, dependent on the other person. Divorce can reposition you to find yourself anew.
★ Find your community. According to Wendy, having a strong sense of community, with people who understand you and advocate for you, is crucial to the healing process.
[02:21] Divorce is a fresh start: Divorce can grant people an opportunity to start over and rediscover themselves.
[03:52] How The Divorce Rehab™ program helps: This five-step proprietary program invites divorcees to see their divorce as an empowering experience to find their identity and create a new life from a confident place.
[05:12] The conversation around divorce needs to be destigmatized: Society shames divorcees as failures, when really, they should be applauded for their courage to pursue a better life.
[09:13] Healing is a collaborative process: It’s important to surround yourself with a strong community of people who understand and support you. This applies to not only the physical environment, but one’s emotional and mental environments as well.
[13:40] Keeping things bottled up only holds you back: When you don’t seek help or community, you’re putting your mental and physical health at risk as well as your job and income — all of the things that need you to be operating at your best.
[19:10] Retrain your mind: Divorce necessitates retraining your brain. You have to realize everything you had dreamt of or planned is going to look different now.
⭐ To inquire about speaking engagements, purchase your copy of Ashley-Nicole’s book “The Cure for Divorce Culture,” or to schedule your private orientation meeting, head to www.anrlaw.com.
⭐ You can also find us on social media @ANRLaw.
⭐ Find a better way forward, right here, on Divorce, Healthy! Subscribe in your preferred podcast app.
⭐ Divorce Lawyer Ashely-Nicole Russell has law offices serving clients in Greenville, Raleigh, and Beaufort, North Carolina.