If you’re going through a divorce or have recently been through one, you’ve probably experienced stressful emotions and have felt lonely in the process. Maybe you’ve seen your kids affected or are afraid they will be negatively impacted in the future. Divorce has a bad reputation in the United States, as we’re inundated on a daily basis with the spectacle of divorces gone wrong. Here, on Divorce, Healthy!, Ashley-Nicole Russell wants to turn that reputation on its head.
Welcome back to Divorce, Healthy! In this episode, our host is accompanied by Divorce Attorney and “Better Apart” author, Gabrielle Hartley. Gabrielle is a divorce mediator and lawyer who practices in New York and Massachusetts. In her book, Hartley provides readers with the five keys on how to move forward after divorce. 7:28
Both Gabrielle and Ashley-Nicole have had experiences with either being divorced or having divorced parents. They know first-hand the tremendous consequences divorce can have on you, your children, and your family. They stress the importance of being true to your own path during your divorce. It’s not necessary to follow in the footsteps of others, even best friends or family members. “If you're getting divorced and your best friend had to hire private investigator, it doesn't mean you need a private investigator (by the way, nobody needs a private investigator, but I mean for divorces!)” 14:08
They also address how negatively divorce can impact your children. It’s vital to allow your children, “especially the younger children…to have their childhoods.” 17:04 Gabrielle shares with us how her mother said to her, “Dad and I have grown up problems, and you're a child and you need to worry about being a kid and we need to worry about our problems.” She points to that conversation as helping her navigate the emotional turmoil of her parents divorce. 17:21
Another key point they discuss is the internal struggle you may encounter during divorce. You need to overcome divorce; look at yourself in the mirror and ask yourself who you are, where you are headed, how much are you planning on fighting unnecessarily? “You may get the windfall, but what is the win? Who are you?... Even if you win, sometimes you really lost… if you got that down and dirty, is that the you you want to look back on?” 29:13
To inquire about speaking engagements, purchase your copy of Ashley-Nicole’s book “The Cure for Divorce Culture,” or to schedule your private orientation meeting, head to www.anrlaw.com. You can also find us on social media @ANRLaw. Find a better way forward, right here, on Divorce, Healthy!