A'magine is back! Beloved listeners, we hope you're familiar with this week's guest at this point, and if you're not, there is a rich archive of A'magine (formerly Amy Jo Goddard) episodes on Medicine Caller and its sister podcast, Vagina Talks. This time A'Magine comes to us at a transition moment in her career and life. She and Sophia are about to teach the last Fire Woman Retreat, and her 25 year teaching career is about to majorly shift. After a year of this global shutdown, how are you changed? How are you continuing to change? If you spend time with yourself in the true, deep quiet, what new parts of yourself can you discover? Enjoy this episode as two old and dear friends find comfort in each other with massive change on the horizon.
(Full transcript below)
Fire Woman Retreat is a unique four-day event designed to give us space to witness, explore and revel in our sexual natures, and to help women and non-binary folks break through the things that hold us back from being who we really are as sexual people.
The theme for this virtual event is Spiritual Transformation, Sexual Initiation & Power. The retreat is May 13-16 2021, so sign up now! SophiaWiseOne.com/FireWoman
What to join for the free Opening Ceremony? You can do that by scrolling down on the page and signing up there!
Fire Woman Retreat is unlike any other event: it is a combination of rich teachings, transformational healing, powerful rituals and group witnessing that allows for big personal & collective breakthroughs.
Find A'magine's books, film updates, and seemingly endless resources at AmyJoGoddard.com
As always you can go to SophiaWiseOne.com for more information about the show, Reports from the Spider Queen, to preorder the I Love My Life Card Game and Oracle Deck, to join Sophia’s email list, and so much more!
“I am Sophia Wise One: Daughter of the Wind. I am calling you to Rise Up, Rise Up, Rise Up. Rise up and take your place.”
This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health providers with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition.
Sophia Wise One 00:01
Hello. Have you been hearing me talk about the fire woman retreat? If you haven't, let's talk about it now. And if you have and you haven't checked it out, just go check it out. Please, please, please, please, I wouldn't be talking about this much if I didn't really think it was at least worth a consideration of your alignment. If you are looking to deepen your consciousness into your body and this retreats theme is spiritual transformation, sexual initiation, and power. It's an incredibly intense time right now, there's so much going on. And that intensity is something that can take us down or that we can ride and it can take us through and being connected to our pleasure, being supported in community to be re-educated around our pleasure, our spirituality, our sexuality is immeasurably valuable. It's so valuable. I'm so grateful that there are spaces where we are doing this with one another. We're, we're healing, we're growing, we're learning. So I'm going to be there. I will be contributing teaching, I will be there participating, and I would love to take this journey with you. So if you haven't checked it out, please check it out now. And look forward to seeing you there. Alright, blink is in the show notes. Thank you love and welcome to Medicine Caller podcast. I want to invite you another layer deeper into the temple, we have a Patreon. And I would love for you to check it out. There are layers of support and nourishment for people calling medicine and for people restoring the temple, people healing together, I would love for you to come support this podcast and be supported in even more ways. To all my patreon members, thank you. We are in this together. I appreciate you. I'm grateful. We'll talk soon. Consider yourself invited. Check it out and I invite you to join. Let's get on with the show. Intimate, wise, and healing conversations with the people who are carrying us through this time of true transformation, and complete rebirth. Welcome to Medicine Caller. We're visionaries share the real, the raw, the good, and the holy. I am your host, Sophia Wise One. Let's try.
Medicine Caller Theme Song "I Hear The Call" by Sophia Wise One 02:36
I hear the call. I know the call. I call the call. I am the call. We call it. I hear the call. I know the call. I call the call. I am the call. We hear the call. We know the call. We call the call. We are the call.
Sophia Wise One 03:14
Welcome beloved listener, I'm so grateful to have you join me here. Welcome to Medicine Caller. They call me Sophia Wise One and I'm your host at the moment here playing the role leaning into the moment and opportunity to join you wherever you are. Before we get started any farther, I want to invite you to take a breath, to give yourself permission to receive what you need and this time you are pushing play, you're arriving in this moment for something, there's some part of you that's curious, exploring, healing, learning, communing, and my blessing is that you find it and I invite you to give yourself permission to experience it. So if it is a word out of my mouth, or my awesome guest's mouth, if it is an insight on your own, if it is a cloud passing by, that it may come to you in this time together. It's been a minute since we were together and I just want to say I have been in baby land with babies, babies, babies and receiving a lot of initiation and medicine of my own self and more than anything at the moment, really appreciating the healing of, of my heart. Really just profound healing and a great awakening. I feel very awakened into life. I have a guest today who, if you are one of my darling listeners who journeys with me, then you know her and we are welcoming back, my beloved, our beloved, imagine and you may know imagine, imagination, our darling precious powerhouse today. Previously, you may have known her as Amy Jo Goddard and she is an incredible teacher facilitator, educator, and thought leader in this world of visionary human, author of two incredible books, the first one being lesbian sex secrets for men, and the second being woman on fire, nine elements to wake up your erotic energy, personal power, and sexual intelligence. And I'm, she's been working for over a decade, is that correct? On at your cervix?
Amy Jo Goddard 05:24
Oh, it's like 16 years but who's counting?
Sophia Wise One 05:27
Who's counting? Who's counting? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right. Nobody's counting, I'm not counting, you're not counting.
Amy Jo Goddard 05:32
I have a teenager. I have a teenager.
Sophia Wise One 05:37
Rooted deeply in her sexual education, medical evaluation education, re-educating and bringing to light some very important and serious notions and issues around how the medical system interacts with our and educates around our cervix. So that film is up and coming. I don't even think I said that, what I'm talking about her she's been working on an incredibly essential, important powerful film, and that is called at your cervix. She is a film writer and author of poet, a dreamer of medicine caller, a leader, she's all those things and so much more. She's my friend. She's a beloved, she is my teacher, she is my companion. And I am so grateful to have you on the show again. Welcome, Imagine.
Amy Jo Goddard 06:21
I love being on your show. Whatever so I mean, you have a lots of them.
Sophia Wise One 06:28
All the shows. I love having you in all the shows.
Amy Jo Goddard 06:30
When all done and we never quite know what's going to happen. So I like that. Keep it interesting.
Sophia Wise One 06:36
I think I remember the first time I had you on, you were like, "Whoa, your questions. This conversation was different than a lot of the same old same old conversations." I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah. I love that feedback. I love it when my guess is like that.
Amy Jo Goddard 06:48
Because that was, you know, that was like in a couple of years after my book had come out and so I had done so many interviews, where I was asked to, like tell us about the nine elements. And I'm like, "Well, I can do that. You can read the book." No, I mean, it's totally fine to talk about it but obviously, it's a huge part of my work. But I did get a lot of very predictable, traditional questioning. So yes, when someone shows up with a different kind of inquiry, you know, I'm always, I'm always interested in that, you know, I think like the people that I follow, the people I'm most interested in as thinkers, as leaders, as teachers are the people that think outside of the box and don't, don't just follow the script. So thank you for not following the script.
Sophia Wise One 07:43
Hey. You know what? When I tried to follow the script, I lost my mind. And anytime I've tried to follow my script, it's ended up really, I have not gotten positive feedback on script following. It turns out so.
Amy Jo Goddard 07:57
I've been trying to make a film based on the script for...
Sophia Wise One 08:03
Amy Jo Goddard 08:05
So yeah. It's not the easiest thing to do.
Sophia Wise One 08:09
Yeah. I, you know, yeah. Exactly. At this, I actually think is very related I wanted to talk about this pivot. This is, so many people right now, as medicine callers, so many people right now are having this experience of, you know, we've gone into this major cocoon, the world has woken up with a lot of us who were already kind of, I don't know, to use these terms like lightly or loosely in some way, like already woke, right? Like we were like walking the awakened path. We were in the process of guiding people through awakening, and then a lot of people, a lot of people were going, "Wait, I, I whoa, wait, what?" You know, and I think it really moved everybody like forward 10 notches, right? Like whoosh. And so everybody is kind of coming out in this next phase, this next evolution of self and you know, we came together because I was, I needed to bridge all my consciousness work into my sexuality because I had this break. I had this dissociative break, once I literally got turned on, all my skills went out the window, and I needed a safe space to to bridge all of this consciousness into my, into my sexuality of sexual consciousness, and to bring, bring my ritual into practice there. So it's, I came to you saying, "Hey, teach, can you teach me?" Right? And that was years ago now and bridging that and coming into that and you are now taking this incredible pivot and I think it's just incredible that you are kind of closing out this chapter with the fire woman retreat, the virtual fire woman retreat of the theme being spiritual transformation, sexual initiation, and power. And I'm really thinking about as I sit with this, this place of when we become initiated, when we activate, and allow true powerful transformation, I can feel it moving in my body right now, we are brought into new lands, we are brought into something completely and totally and utterly different. And that is, that is exactly where I am right now. I know my like sweet listener right now, listening is just being like, oh, tell me the story of myself like that is what's happening right now. I know that's happening for you right now. So kind of whatever you want to speak into that, and I can kind of ask them more questions and we can get into it but those are, those are some of my, this moment that we're in I'm feeling in my own body.
Amy Jo Goddard 10:35
It is indeed a moment. It's bigger than a moment, you know, it's a, it's an emergence. It's an emergence. Yeah, I mean, so many of us have realized what wobbly ground we've been standing on. And, you know, wobbles, of course are uncomfortable and sometimes we feel like we're gonna get hurt, and like, oh, what's going to happen? And you know, when, when you kind of just flow with the wobble and you know, allow what is trying to birth itself, trying to emerge, you know, it's like the, the caterpillar and the butterfly metaphor has been used so much during this time, for a good reason, right? You know, I mean, the pain of the, of the caterpillar, you know, the imaginal cells of the caterpillar turning into the butterfly, it's painful, it's, it's painful. And, you know, we really have been in this like deep, dark cocoon, where nobody knows what is on the other side of the membrane, you know, and you know, it's like we're all going to push through this membrane in some way. And something new gets to emerge in all of our lives, even if you're not changing careers, even if you're not changing locations, or making some of those big moves that so many people are making, none of us will ever be the same. And you know, really, that's what life always is. And so I think in some way, this, this time in our lives has brought great, great relief, like it's really brought, like you know, it's brought the camera lens in to focus on this is what life is, this is what we do, you know, we, we evolve, we change, we, we fall down, we hurt ourselves, we get back up, we figure something out, we learn another little piece of our story, or of the puzzle, or of where we want to go, or what we want to experience, we make decisions about it, you know, we go in a new direction, we learn some stuff there, we pivot again, I mean, this is, this really is life but it's like life being condensed into this very focused time of, of looking very closely and very hard at how we're living. And what, what is really serving us, what is satisfying to us, what is making us unhappy? What gets to change, you know, I just think we're all in a time of making those kinds of decisions. And, you know, for me, it's been, I've been teaching for 25 years, I've been teaching my entire adult life. I've taught in every different, you know, just about every different environment that I could, every different age that I could, I've taught sexuality from, you know, first graders, literally to adults, to college students to adults. So I've done that. And it's something I've been so passionate about, I think I, I always thought, I would always do it. And and I may, I don't know, but I know that right now I'm, my soul is just longing for something else. And I want my days to look different and the way I get to spend my time, I want to be quieter. That's part of it. I want to be quieter. I talk so much. It's making me tear up, I talk just you know, you know, and that's a gift. That's one of my gifts. You know, it's my, probably my greatest gift. It's the thing I'm best at. So it's hard to, to kind of orphan the thing that you feel best at, you know, or somehow shelf it. But I'm in a time where, yeah, something else gets to emerge.
Sophia Wise One 15:06
My hand. I am just offering my hands to you, just being with you. It comes in my heart when you share that is like just gratitude like thank you. Thank you for all the work, thank you for all the talking, and thank you for the courage to let it rest, to like give it a moment and I, I can relate to that. My listeners listening to my journey of like burnout and, and my own kind of shift and my own work and not touching people's bodies and saying like I can't touch people's bodies like I know that it's like such a powerful gateway to transform not just myself and not just them but this shared world, right, like this superpower and yet to know, it's time to let it, to let all of it change, right? To let the gift have its time to like rest, and grow, and restore, and become new and to let you be new, you know, like you've earned that. And I don't mean or I don't even know what the word earned means. It's like with yourself, it's like a soulful earning, it's not an external, right, but it's like you've come to this place, you've come to this place where the next step is just the threshold. Like it just is the threshold. And I think about how, when we cross through those thresholds like the big ones in our life, like it's something about the doorways. I think our soul doorways, the image that comes to mind is like they're a shape. And we can only pass through what we like what can pass through, it has to match the shape. And there are things that we have to let go of to like pass through the portal and the true things will come with us, they'll come through behind, they'll like they'll be on the other side waiting, right. But there's something about the portal or the pathway that requires us to change the shape that we used to be. I described so many times this, this my own kind of deep dive in this emergence is like going down into the underworld growing, retrieving all these parts of myself. And then I went to go up, up to the top, up above again. And the path to the up above, I no longer fit. I was like literally too big. I went down deep into the earth healed and grew. And I didn't have a tunnel out anymore. And so I had to dig my way a new tunnel, just like I did in my kind of deep first awakening. And there's no, it's funny, there's no shortcut for that. But there certainly are things that make it like helpful, make it more efficient, make it kinder, make it sweeter. I know in my life, that's really true. What is your, what is the bomb for you these days in this process, this courageous path that you're in right now, laying these things down and saying yes to not knowing and saying yes to these new knowings like what has been a bomb for you?
Amy Jo Goddard 18:16
Creativity. Creativity. Playing piano. Anyone that's followed me knows that's been my, I just had my one year anniversary of playing piano and it's been my thing. And you know, finishing my poem, the creativity, you know, like just getting to focus more on the creativity of that. And, you know, right now, we're nearly done, and we're, we are crafting how to present it to the world. So it's a new phase of the create, the creation. And, yeah, you know, slowly figuring out what the next book will be. Have some ideas percolating. So I'm just in the percolation, you know, and, and walking, just a lot of walking. I've been living in the Southwest and walking here and just experiencing the expanse of sky. I would say it's one of my, one of my favorite things. So yeah, but it's, it's, you know, and that's just the creativity pieces, the part I'm longing for. I've been doing what I do for so long, you know, and it's always creative. I mean, building a business is creative. Marketing is creative. You know, I'm always writing. I'm always crafting something. And I've been doing the same kinds of things for a long time and teaching the same kinds of programs for a long time. And I'm just yeah, I'm just longing to create new things in new ways. You know, I've been creating new things. In a similar way for a long time, so I want to really step out of that and give myself more space for that.
Sophia Wise One 18:30
Congratulations! What's the, the, the knocking? Like what's knocking from the inside that you can... This is, that's my question. That's the question I'm hearing. What's knocking from the inside to come out?
Amy Jo Goddard 20:32
I mean I guess my artists self, you know, it's sort of like, like I've always been the professional teacher that makes smart. Just smart see things or creative things and has this film that maybe someday, you know, but I, and a long time ago, I, you know, I wrestled with the whole like identity of artists. And, you know, I got over that and started calling myself an artist because I am but it hasn't really been my professional identity. It hasn't been the thing that I wear out front. And I, I, you know, it's infused in everything I do. People come to my events, they see my creativity, they see the ritual, which I think is always creative. You know, that's always an aspect of what I do. And it's always been sidelined. It's always been sort of like you know, I'm a teacher, you know, but I also make plays, you know, I used to make plays in New York, I've gotten to do that in years, I want to, I want to do that again. And, you know, and making music has just been so fun. And it's not for any goal, other than for what it does for me and you know, if it gets to evolve into something, if I actually get good at it, then great but it really is something that's just for me. But yeah, I think that's what's, what's knocking and yeah, and just using creativity as a way into deeper aspects of the self, of myself and those I work with inspiration. You know, changing my name to a word that intimates the word imagine was not an accident, you know, that was like you know, that came from spirit. They were like, no, this, this, you get to carry that in your name. With the A, you know, people are still kind of like imagining it. It's A-magine, you know, it's a, I love it. I love how it sounds. I love the, I love the feeling of it. I love that it gets to center one of the most magical parts of life every time someone calls me. So, so yeah, I think that's, that's really what it's about.
Sophia Wise One 23:10
One of the things that I love and treasure about, my understanding of this very mushy thing called reality is that this idea that we can imagine what it is, and then it becomes and the more that I walk in exquisite faith which is not particularly common about me so much as about like faith and the experience of just like how, how stunning this path has, how humble I feel and this like this trust, it's I'm, I'm startled by my experience of of life and these days like regularly. One of the things I keep thinking about, even right now, like I love taking this moment of just being like a 100 years ago, could someone have even imagined like us having a video interview with microphones and headphones that are locally recording that will upload to a cloud which is just someone else's computer that will that download to my computer that I'll email to someone else, they'll make it into a thing, and then some darling humans going to be listening to our voices to tell these stories anywhere on the planet, right? Like that like.
Amy Jo Goddard 24:46
Sophia Wise One 24:47
It's remarkable. And the part, it's just completely remarkable. And the part that I just keep beating into right now is we're that reality of a 100 years ago, any, so the idea that like literally anything, anything that is deemed as impossible, or improbable, or not real, or fictional, or fantasy to me has just completely, it's, it's just lost all grip. I'm just like what about our current reality in which let alone, I talk about the insanity of morality is that the shit show of it, that's the crazy part. That's the part that's like unimaginable to me and that's happening like that's insane like let's as a race destroy our water source, that is unimaginable like that is an insane, insane prospect and yet that is super real happening, right? And so, you know, I always, I just love to remind myself and to remind each other to like so we can remember like a world in which we are well and we are taking care of things well is like the sanest, easiest, simplest, naturalist thing to imagine and to bring into being and to remind myself that permission slip and the Spider Queen teachings that have been coming through me for the past few years have been so consistent like she's just said to me over and over again like ask audaciously with abandon like completely. And recently, the message that came through from her was the desire is the solution. The desire is the solution. She just keeps telling me over and over again, the desire is the solution. And that connected place, that the process of coming into and dismantling the trauma attachments to my like coping mechanisms, like people pleasing, and like using my ability to like kind of my sexuality as a way to manipulate situations and feel good about myself and so my wires around like what actually felt good and what was like working to get my needs met was like confusing. And as I came through and kind of healed those traumas, and really came into a place of understanding what was my desire, right? That became incredibly holy. Just incredibly and it's become such a deep practice because I still have these impulses, his desires come up and I can still feel these parts, especially the creative desires, or for me, relational desires, where I'm just like I can feel these. What's it called? Like leashes? These gags, these like these, these pull downs that want to say like, o, no, not that. That's too far. You can't want that, like that desires, too far. And I just, I was so confident because recently, as much as that as quick as the gag comes up, this other voice that comes in, that's just like, it's just a permission slip. It's like, let's just hear it out. Let's just hear the desire out. And understanding that, that desire for me is like spirit's call. And so, it's not that the desire is the solution because I desire, but because I am cultivated and crafted and directed through my desire.
Amy Jo Goddard 28:03
That's yummy. Yes. Oh, I love how you, how you, how you wordsmith that, how you spidered that, you spidered that, yeah, you know, and thank you for bringing up Spider Queen. I also carry spider medicine and work with her and you know, she taught us creativity. I mean, that's, that's her, that's her greatest gift. Like what, what is more gorgeous in nature than a beautiful spun web. She taught us to weave. She taught us the primordial alphabet in her web. That is the myth of spider woman of the spider. Yeah, so yeah. And I think, you know, as you were talking, it was also making me think of, you know, creativity isn't the end, like I'm longing for the process of creativity, and all the many, all the many things that can come from that. And I think the biggest thing, and so many of us are longing for is like really how do we create a different world? How do we create a world that, that really works for everyone? Because it's very possible to create a world that works for everyone. We just continue to choose not to, and there's lots of systems and things that get in the way of that, that are, you know, crumbling, I hope. Some slower than others and some really, really need to go. You know, but I think as there are enough of us saying, no, we're not going to live in the old way. We're not going to live in that old script, right, back to the script, you know, we're creating new scripts, we're creating new ways of leading, we're creating new kinds of collaboration and collaborative work. We are allowing ourselves to really vision what a different world could be. And we've been forced to, I mean, look at us. I mean, talk about, you know, 100 years ago, would we have thought we're doing this? A year ago, you know, like a year and a half ago, two years ago, would we have thought, Oh, my God for an entire year, the world as we know, it is going to stop and everyone is going to go into their caves and hibernate, you know, and do what they need to do to keep maintaining their lives but everyone, everyone else around the world...
Sophia Wise One 30:44
Dream risked, stepping out into the world. The extremes of it like that, everyone who like the code cocooned did this test, it's been this deep cocoon, and then though, like the warriors of the grocery and the trash, and the sanitation, and the hospitals, and the medical staff like that is right, exactly. So more say like that's the thing people do. It's funny, we say if someone were to say, but like technically, it did get said... Nobody believed it, they couldn't imagine it.
Amy Jo Goddard 31:18
Like who would have really thought in our modern, fast paced technological transportation oriented world, that so much would come to a halt, or slow the way that it did and, you know, and so, we can really listen deeply to that, you know, or we can just be frustrated with it and think like okay, when can, when can we just get on with it and get back to how things were, which, you know, enough people have said, like, obviously, we're not going back to how things were? You know, but there's real gifts in that, there's real medicine in this time. And I think, you know, many people are really, really looking at what that medicine is for them and taking that very seriously and it's a missed opportunity if we don't. And you're struggling against you know, what life is trying to teach you if you don't and you're just making it harder on yourself anyway. Maybe, maybe don't do that.
Sophia Wise One 32:30
A'Magining, A'Magining. Yeah. It's funny I feel a knocking, I feel knocking right now. I keep, I keep, I want to sing like want to sing a song and I'm having a, I'm like, can I sing a jewel cover? Is that cool? Is that, in podcast world? Is that allowed like am I allowed to sing a pod like...
Amy Jo Goddard 32:49
I think so.
Sophia Wise One 32:51
I think I can.
Amy Jo Goddard 32:53
I think Jewel would feel, would feel good about that.
Sophia Wise One 32:56
Oh my gosh, Jewel, do you want to come on the show? I'd love to have you. I experienced you as a visionary artists.
Amy Jo Goddard 33:03
Oh my gosh, I remember when that record came out. I listened to it incessantly. She's good.
Sophia Wise One 33:09
I am so grateful. She's good. Here we go. We'll have a little, a little shout out to, to Jewel's lyrics. Uncommon. You know, this place of, this place of, yeah. I'll sing the song. I'll sing the song. Don't worry, mother. It'll be alright. Don't worry, sister. Say our prayers and sleep tight. It'll be fine, lover of mine. It'll be just fine. Lend your voices only the sounds of freedom. No longer lend your strength to that which you wish to be free from. Fill your life with love and bravery. You shall lead a life uncommon. I've heard your anguish. I've heard your hearts cry out. We are tired. We are weary but we aren't worn out. Set down your chains till only faith remains. Set down your chains and lend your voices only to sounds of freedom. No longer lend your strength to that which you wish to be free from. Fill your life with love and bravery. You shall lead a life uncommon. There are plenty of people who prayed for peace. But if praying were enough, it would have come to be. Let your words enslave no one and heavens will hush themselves to hear. Our voices ring out clear with sounds of freedom. Sounds of freedom. Come on you unbelievers, move out of the way. There is a new army coming and we are armed with faith to live. We must get to live and lend our voice. Only to sounds of freedom. No longer lend our strength to that which we wish to be free from. Fill your life with love and bravery and we shall live a life uncommon.
Amy Jo Goddard 36:43
Thank you for that medicine. Wow. No longer lend your strength to that which you wish to be free from truth.
Sophia Wise One 36:56
Deep down your chains till only faith remains. No longer lend your strength. It's huge. It's huge. It's everything that we're being asked to do is to see clearly and to make choices.
Amy Jo Goddard 37:12
Well, and, and the faith piece is such a big piece right now. You know, regardless of what you believe in in the world, I assume if you're listening to this podcast, you believe in something greater than yourself. You know, we just, we don't know what's on the other side, you know, so it really is about each step, each day, each choice, you know, making those choices in the service of the vision. You know, as Audre Lorde said, you know, when, when I use my strength in the service of my vision, it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid. So, as we do that, you know, each step of the way, and we just do it with faith, and faith gets to win over fear, that's when we're actually creating and weaving the life that we that, that is what we believe in, right? That is the life that will embody our truest values and ideals and in our vision of the world.
Sophia Wise One 38:29
I just am so grateful for faith. I have to speak into this place and it's like I don't, I just, I don't know how often I've talked about it on the show. I feel like it's been so huge for me, I could talk about it every day, which is just that the more I committed and showed up to walk in faith, the more doubt I experienced. And, and it took me a while to put it together. I was like I don't understand, like I'm, I am like so faithful, like I keep taking all these faithful steps. And I was just, I mean, it was months and the doubt voices were getting louder and louder and louder. And it was really this understanding of like because I wasn't picking up my coping. I wasn't picking up my, my safety net. I was just walking farther and farther out without the safety net. I just had less and less of any safety net that wasn't just my faith. And so the the pinning became really clear. And I remember this, this, this medicine moment and I don't know if it was spider queen or the grandmothers that I was communing with that said to me, you know, if you don't want to suffer Sophia, you need to make a choice, either, either, so obvious now, right? There like either listen to your guidance and have faith and just lay down the doubt like just do it. And, or with the doubt or without the doubt, lay down the fight for the guidance, Like follow the guidance but don't fight it and you will be free from suffering. Or be controlling and make your own choices and see what happens. But if you're going to walk in faith and then be controlling, you're going to feel terrible all the time.
Amy Jo Goddard 40:19
It doesn't work.
Sophia Wise One 40:21
Like of course, you feel like crap. Like you keep taking all these faith decisions and then looking for how to control it. That's a great
Amy Jo Goddard 40:30
That is hypothetical. That is, that's just, yeah.
Sophia Wise One 40:39
It's not the same book. Not the same book. Pick a book. Like you want it, like there's no problem. Yeah. Like if you want to control and make decisions and make plans to do things, that's fine, but like you're not going to feel happy if you combine those books together, you know? And it does, it still makes me laugh when I think about it because I'm like that's so true. It's just so true. And, and there's so much beauty and pleasure in, in either of those books, if you're light hearted about it, right? Like I like make a plan. I try it, I'm playing the game. Like if you want to game the game of life and try it make a plan, see it work, see it fail, through any of pleasure in that, right? Totally. Right? Sure. Or to, to have faith, take the step and to be open and to listen for the next. And I've, is, I am, and that's what I've chosen at this chapter in my life and it is. I am coming into a lightness of being that I haven't ever had before. And it's feel so precious and like but not, what's the word? It's like, it's like, I have this image of a plant that's like small and sprouting. But like a very strong resilient plan, not like a little one that was like don't the wind, the one that like makes it through like the wind, like all that every who's just like, "Nah, man. I'm good. Like, I got this." Like, it feels like precious and early and strong. Like it feels so strong because it's come through such like of by faith has come through such a folded steel path, right. And so like the foundations are still kind of new to me in this way but they're, they're steady in a way that I've never had and I that's what I pray for, if you were to like open my journals for a year ago, it was just like, steady and all caps on every page. And I might be exaggerating, but I might not like there might be an entire journal that has the word like like, please, dear God help me have a steadiness and to find that, my answer for that was really this, this faith walk. And I learned something very interesting. I'd love to hear what kind of where you are with this is that I really learned that spider medicine, weaving medicine, conscious, quantum manifesting is a very different way than the control go and get it make it happen strategy, because it's really...
Amy Jo Goddard 43:05
I don't want to say about this. I don't know what you're talking about. Go on.
Sophia Wise One 43:12
Okay, bear with me. Stay with me. Stay with me. Stay with me. Okay. So right. Because I go into the quantum field, I go into this meditative state, I have this clarity, I have this deep vibrational transcendent of personal identity and then this gathered sense of what my part is to do. Sure, you're with me, right? My part. So I come back and I do my part. And then it's like I hang out for six weeks. Like there's nothing to do, like there's nothing to do, there's no doing because the like vibration of the field is like that's this faith is like then I just have to let go and like hang out, which is sounds so wild to say it's like talk about like antithetical to like American society, right? Like I go into a deep meditative state, I come out, I take an action. It's not like I'm not taking an action. I take an action and then a couple days later, I have another action. But it's like literally hours, days, or weeks in between, sometimes there's clarity, and I'm like I guess I'll bounce this baby. And I'll like call this, I get those little on a daily basis, I get those little bits of information, but they're softer and softer, and they're not about this, they're not the sequential doing and they're not even this kind of magicking pulling, right? It's just this like it really is the surrendering part and it's been about six months now since I had this epiphany and I feel like I'm just starting to kind of have a little bit more of this ease of like okay, I do this part and like sometimes I have like eight hour days or 12 hour days or like you know, four days in a row where I'm like, I'm like implementing this information that's like doo-doo-doo-doo-doo and then it's like okay, now I just like not. Now, I just not, right? Like I just like, I just let it, let it be. Yeah. So what do you not, what do you not have anything to say?
Amy Jo Goddard 45:07
Well, no, I mean, I've talked about this that, you know, one of I mean, anyone who knows me personally knows that I am one of the most driven people on the planet you will ever meet, despite the fact that it's taken me 16 years to make a film. But that's my will, right like that, so I've really been looking at this idea of will and drive and where did that come from in me and how, how much of that was learned? How much of that was because I grew up in a military family? How much of that was because, you know, I grew up in the US of A? How much of that was a response to trauma? Because I do think the doing and the doing it well is often a trauma response that we don't always recognize, because it is something that is generally appreciated about people, and expected, you know, you're going to work hard, you're going to make things happen, you're going to, you know, you're gonna be in charge of something, your life at least so, you know, that's the fog I've been coming out of, and just realizing how exhausted I am from living my life that way. And so it's wildly uncomfortable to say, you know, and I've been told by, you know, someone read my human design and someone, you know, I've worked with, you know, some different folks on this issue over the last year, and you know, and they keep telling me like, just to like be quiet or be more still wait, wait for the information. And that's like, what? No! But I go for things, you know, and this has been such a big part of my identity. And so, you know, I think my shift has been getting comfortable with not doing that, and just okay. You know, I have no idea. You know, and of course, there's like all these fears I could really feed and give attention to. Oh my God, if I stopped teaching, you know, what, what's gonna happen to my business? How things gonna work? You know, but, but yet I'm, I'm doing things to expand it right now, you know, because I know that in order to shift the way I'm making money in the world, and the way I'm doing life that, that requires support, you know, so I'm actually shoring up my support, rather than you know, doing the the thing that I've done so much in my life which is just like, "Alright, put on my boots, and I'm gonna do it, and I'm just gonna make it happen. And I'll just stay up all night, if I have to, and I'll," you know, and you know, I'm sleeping more, I'm sleeping a lot, I'm needing more sleep, and I'm listening out of my body and letting myself sleep. Yeah, I'm not always good at going to bed, because I love the night, but I'm better. You know, but like that's been the medicine to just sleep. And that's what they just keep saying, keep sleeping, just keep sleeping. In my dreams are so vivid, there's so much happening, you know, I can only remember a few of them in the mornings, but oh, my God that the dreaming has been, you know, and I write them down so at some point, I maybe I can make some sense of all of it. And so it's just trusting each, each step of the way, each round of the web that at the end, you know, you know, I'll be able to step back and say, "Oh, my God! Wow! This is the tapestry I was weaving the whole time." I didn't, I didn't realize it, I think that's often true for art, or for any kind of creative project you see pieces of it along the way or, or you have parts of it that are clear and parts that maybe aren't and that certainly has been the case for at your cervix all these years. You know, it, it's a complex story, it took us a long time to figure out how to tell the story and be effective, you know, and that's just, that's, there's a discomfort and a what's the word I want? Like the stabilizing the element to the creative process. That's what it is. So, so if we want to be you know, you can't have it both ways. And I think we tend to want it both ways. But I want to know, we really like to know, I think humans like to know, I want to know what's gonna happen and so this, so that already is just wildly uncomfortable for everybody because we don't know.
Sophia Wise One 49:54
Well, you know what's so wild about that one piece you said so many things that I wanted to comment on, but I'm waving about this one so that's the one I'm talking about right now which is, Ilove you, which is, um, and then there's this whole part that I have had this experience and I feel like I keep having this experience watching other people's experiences like and then there's that part where like we do know, and we spend so much time by fighting what we know, like and I just had this experience, again, bring up spider woman again where I was receiving a channeling and she just kept starting to share something with me, and then she would stop and she'd be like you don't want to hear it. You don't want to know. All I can tell you is you already know. And every time I go to articulate it to you, you get all controlling and what did she say to me? It's so good. It's so good. I've been thinking about it, because she said, let's see, already know, she says, you don't want to hear it? Then admit that. Stop looking and then closing your eyes, stop opening the chest and then turning out the lights. If you are not ready or willing to look at see yet, then put your focus elsewhere, I cannot help you there. That is your own choice. You know, and so like that place too, of just being like we want to know, but like we don't want to know. And it's like it's probably had such a powerful year of these, we've talked about this, these, these very specific things that never happened to me before that are very consistent now. Specific timelines, locations, details, like all of these kinds of not metaphorical messages, just like straight up, this is gonna happen then. And I'm just like, what, okay, okay, and having this year of being like, oh, no, that's just accurate. Like I'm just getting accurate information. And so it's so interesting for me to be like I want to know, I want to know, and then be like, okay, you can know, and then I'm like I don't want, to know, I don't want to know. Like I don't know. I'm not ready to hear what I want to hear, I'm not ready to hear what I don't want to hear. You know, like I just I, you know, that's part of that controlling place. And her message is just being like that's fine. But like, again, save yourself the suffering by not begging to hear an answer and then blocking your ears like just, just focus, just focus elsewhere. Just like put your focus where you where you can be open has been the message that I've been getting and I think the message of you sleeping is incredibly important right now, because the rest is so crucial to the creativity. The like, I think about like pregnant women, and how one of the biggest things that pregnant women do is sleep and not all pregnant people, whatever their gender are, but many people that are pregnant, like at five weeks, like the one thing that a lot of them will say it's just being like, and then I just slept. And it's like, yeah, you're like building an entire life, right? Like you're building an entire lot, a lot of energy. Like that's a lot of energy. And so when we are in our own transformations, a lot of energy, oh-oh-oh-oh, this feels like such the perfect place to share this medicine piece. When I was holding one of my siblings newborn, they were just a couple weeks old and so I think where was it, it was here, I guess this was my third newborn and five weeks that I was holding on my chest with little to you know, with visitations into the dream round my self.
Amy Jo Goddard 53:24
Sophia Wise One 53:27
So as in baby heaven, with baby number three, at week number four or five and I'm sitting there with this little darling being who's mostly star energy with like a heartbeat and some new synapses going roop-roop-roop-roop-roop, you know, it's like they don't know how to breathe, they don't know how to eat, they don't know how to poop, they don't know how to regulate their heart rate, like they're just like, wah, wah, wah wah, there's this vibrational field, like can someone tell me what I'm doing and you like put them on, I put them on my skin and they're like okay, this is vibrational being. I can breathe, I can, I can heart rate. I can, I can do heart rate, heart rate, you know, so I'm holding this baby and I was filled with this memory. And it was the memory was actually for me over a year ago in that like February, March, that death rebirth time that I had and there was this energetic field and I was so humbled and I was like I had no recollection of ever feeling that feeling before when I like a year and a half ago, right, like what this feeling was and when I held this baby, and the baby felt the same way that I felt. It set this understanding, this like respect for what I had just gone through. I was like, I was a newborn. I was a vibration. I was a newborn. I didn't know how to regulate my heart rate. I didn't know how to sleep, I didn't know how to eat. Those are all true. Like I was, you know, I was guided and I was held, I was mentored Caitlin, my dearest who's on my podcast editor. Hi, love. He was also my midwife through this process. We were in ceremony together for 28 days. And she was birthed, like walked with me and sat with me like hour after hour, day after day. I mean, I, I really was holding this baby that I understood the reality of what it is to be a newborn at any age of vibrational, and like on these certain levels, because our physical self is a vibrational self. This the reality of what it is. And the other thing is like you want to know what babies do a lot?
Amy Jo Goddard 55:47
Sophia Wise One 55:51
Sleep. And not all babies, any of you who have babies who did not sleep a lot, I love you. And I honor that math.
Amy Jo Goddard 55:58
There's people cursing at you right now that like...
Sophia Wise One 56:01
I know. Not my baby. My baby didn't sleep. I know. I know, sweetheart. Not all babies grow through sleep, some babies don't. And if you're a baby who was a baby, or if you're a parent to a baby, and when we're, the, when we are a newborn as an adult, we are both the parent and the baby that is not getting sleep and sleeping all the time. You know, it's like and so, so that, that story comes to mind when you talk about your journey right now and giving yourself that permission, right? It's like to sleep and let those, let the growth habits time.
Amy Jo Goddard 56:32
And it was a really hard permission to give myself. I had to have somebody else tell me like no, you, you're depleted, you need to sleep. And I love what you're saying because if we're really thinking about the quantum, right, everything exists at once in the quantum so, so all of us are newborns. You know, all of us are elders and sages. All of us are wide eyed, curious children. You know, all of us are snotty, no at all teenagers. Like we're all of that. And, yeah, if we embrace those other parts of ourselves that maybe we thought we had grown beyond or I'm not that anymore, whatever our feelings are about it, yeah, what else would you give yourself permission for?
Sophia Wise One 57:31
Shooo! I've always loved eating ice cream, eat more ice cream. There's a fair amount of ice cream in this house.
Amy Jo Goddard 57:37
I do. I've waited, I've been eating some really good non-dairy ice cream.
Sophia Wise One 57:40
Yeah. Ice cream has been a real, it's been a real medicine tool for me in this chapter and not a ton of ice cream but ice cream for sure. And sometimes that's my road trip snack when I need a nap, I'll pull over and like a sunny spot and then I'll eat, like an ice cream sandwich was like my old school go to and they used to cost 50 cents and I would go and I would get an ice cream stick and then I put my feet up backwards, I put my head in like the driver well and put my feet up so my head or above and do a little inversion, like eat my ice cream and then I give myself reiki and then I pass out. I really think that it's part of the charge is like ice cream. You know, the little, little thing, oh, I always, I had this realization when I was like a teenager, I don't know when I had this. Oh, that's hilarious that I'm about to do it that way. At some point in my journey, I began to describe aging instead of a line like a linear aging as like an orb that expands and gets bigger. And so like all ages and all aspects are present at all times, right, and that we as we age, our like innocence grows and our wisdom grows and our stubbornness grows like all those capacities or like any aspects of our, our self, our age, the wisdom or the challenges like they grow and it's our spaciousness is our growth that's like that our spaciousness and our ability to navigate that with, with gracefulness, or power or presence like that, the presence of that to expand in our presence.
Amy Jo Goddard 59:03
Yeah, that's a much better way of looking at it and I think that there's so many things that we've been looking at in a linear fashion and we've realized the world is made of more circles than lines.
Sophia Wise One 59:17
More circles than lines. Yeah. Yeah. That's why we have tats of webs on us. Yeah, nets. Well, you know, that we literally have, could and will have some long conversations. This could just keep on going, you know, hours and hours on the road.
Amy Jo Goddard 59:38
I feel like when I'm on your podcast, it's just sort of like we're, we're like hanging out in the living room with the lights dim, eating ice cream, just like you know, pontificating about you know, the stuff we pontificate about, putting people into the conversation. So, thank you all if you made it this far on the recording, it's impressive. Thank you.
Sophia Wise One 1:00:03
Oh, they do. They hang. Be my booze. Be my booze. They love here hanging out in the living room. That's the whole deal. That's the whole deal. Totally. If you want the like breakdown information from me or A'Magine, there's like webinars or stuff. You can have that, too. That's fine.
Amy Jo Goddard 1:00:25
No PowerPoint involved. No framework.
Sophia Wise One 1:00:32
No framework. Personal celebration, I did make my first ever actual good looking PowerPoint. Thanks to you, Canva. Makes things pretty. And then presenting, I was like I still think I whatever. Okay, so speaking of which, A'Magine, I do want to say A'Magine, A'Magine is running another fire woman retreat. She's also running love skin the intensive in person work that I did and, you know, supporting again and doing with A'Magine again, currently, and these programs are incredible and life changing and they're going on the shelf. They're going, they're laying down. There, this is it. And so if you want to come and join from this masterful teacher, who is sharing her work, right now, in these ways, before putting some of that voice and teaching to bed for a little nap and some growth time long nap, a good long nap, maybe for, maybe for the rest of this life, but that open face place. But clarity, clarity on that, if you you know, I don't know. I just I know sometimes people are like it's the last one, that's not. That's not a, that's not a magic style. This is like a real, she's really done the thing and now she's wrapping it up. So I just want to say the theme is totally on theme for Medicine Caller of all the fire woman's for you to come to come to the like spiritual deep dive, we're just going to be doing the yum-yum's of the spirit body intersection and she has incredible teachers in addition to me, but she has a wonderful other teachers that are coming and she's gonna, she's gonna share her some of her just magnificent, deep, hard earned, well studied knowledge with us. And so I really encourage you there's a link down below, please come and join us. At least go click that link and check it out. And it call it into your heart and see is this is the community are this space to nourish you. We'd love to have you and, and is there anything A'Magine, that you, like how you're inviting people? I know you're kind of getting ready for a rest, you're doing this work. And also, like your website, I just I'm not totally positive on your director.
Amy Jo Goddard 1:00:42
It is. We're going through the rebrand process. I'm being real slow about that. But yeah, you know, we are currently still at amyjogoddard.com. We will be at a amaginenation.com as soon as we figure it all out, but uh, you know, it's incubating. It's incubating, and I'm not rushing it. My team was rushing me for a little while. And finally they were like, okay, cool. If you're not in a rush, we're not in a rush. So it'll happen when it happens. And fire women retreat is, you know, all the infos there, easy to find. Yeah, I mean, I've been teaching love skin for 11 years. It's my my juicy sexual empowerment program. It's in person. I have a group of women that have waited all year. You know, you've been with us this year as we've waited to do it. And then I realized, oh, this is the last time I'm going to do this. So, so yeah, there's there's a couple spots left for that, that journey if people want to take that that deep, deep dive with us, and if you want to a lighter, deep dive, right, nonetheless, yeah, the fire women retreat. You know, I've been doing that retreat for five years now. And it's, it's really one of the most magnificent events. I love it so much. And I'm just ready for new things. So you know, I don't know that I'll be teaching retreats anytime soon but if I do, it's, it's gonna look real different. So sure, so yeah, so yeah, come, come celebrate, come raise a toast with us. Come like the spiritual sexual juju, yumminess and yeah, where it's gonna be ritual and play and depth and laughter and tears and curiosities. And it's, it's really all the things so.
Sophia Wise One 1:04:53
Good stuff. Call the temple. Call the temple.
Amy Jo Goddard 1:04:57
They can come to that for free, also. So if you want to give them the link for opening ceremony, you can.
Sophia Wise One 1:05:04
Alright. We can come to them to that holding up the temple.
Amy Jo Goddard 1:05:07
If you're not sure you want to commit to the whole weekend, or for some reason, you can't, come to opening ceremony. So.
Medicine Caller Theme Song "I Hear The Call" by Sophia Wise One 1:05:13
Yeah. I'll throw that in. Yeah.
Amy Jo Goddard 1:05:14
Thursday, May 13th and then the actual retreat is May 14th through the 16th.
Sophia Wise One 1:05:22
I'm excited. I'm excited. I want to say one more thing, which is that at your cervix is a documentary real time, big time talk and if you have any connection, you just like, please stay in touch, like well, I'm sure, I'll have you back on a measurements in that space but we'll include, again, in some show notes, we'll include some information around at your cervix so you can check that out because I really want to help and support the, the growth in the sharing, it's coming, it's coming through. It's emerging, it's coming through and it's, it's time for the world to, to know, these realities that are a big deal and to make them different to imagine and then to make something different. Well, we know we're totally at time closing words, A'Magine, I invite you to share a visioning of the world that is to come, and anything else that you want to share to, to, to your closing words.
Amy Jo Goddard 1:06:18
I yeah, I envision a world where we have people that support communities that are not police. That leadership and communities comes from and through communities, and is not something done to or enacted on communities. To me, that is one of the most critical things for where we're going, and what it looks like for everyone to actually contribute and participate in creating the community and society and family and nation. You know, all the levels that we, that, that we're longing for from, from a real true vision that is rooted in spiritual, you know, that is supported by spiritual sustenance and really rooted in freedom and liberation and love.
Sophia Wise One 1:07:29
Yes. Thank you so much. Thank you for joining us today. Thank you for your vision. Thank you for your work. Thank you for your rest. Dear listeners.
Amy Jo Goddard 1:07:40
Vision. I love you.
Sophia Wise One 1:07:43
I cut you off.
Amy Jo Goddard 1:07:44
No, I just said thank you for this conversation.
Sophia Wise One 1:07:46
Oh, you're welcome. I love you. Sweet dear listeners, thank you so much for joining. Go ahead and hit follow wherever you are listening and check out A'Magines other episodes on this shows and others. Join us. Join us, join us, join us. I could say a million things. I love you. Thank you. Bless you. Take a deep breath. Thank yourself for your own life. I'm glad you're here. And I just wish you a softness today and encouraged today as you walk forward. And may there be a lightness in your step. Alright, take care. Be well.
Medicine Caller Theme Song "I Hear The Call" by Sophia Wise One 1:09:16
Hear the call. We know the call. We call the call. We know the call. We call the call. We are the call. I hear the call. I know the call. I call the call. I am the call.
Sophia Wise One 1:09:41
Thank you gorgeous one. Thank you. I want to take a moment in closing. I have a few things. First, take a breath. Second, I want to remind you that this in itself can be transmission and medicine. So take care of yourself right now. If this is medicine for you, I have a few invitations. One is hit that subscribe button, leave me a rate and review. It's very, very helpful. In addition, I would love to stay connected with you. Come over to my website, sophiawiseone.com or find me on Instagram at Sophia Wise One and get connected. And if this is feeding you, I encourage you to join the virtual temple that is up and gorgeous and happening. And that is my Patreon and I'm inviting you to join us there. If this episode or another episode fed you and was just what you need, consider sending it and sharing it with a friend. Thank you. Thank you for all your support. Thank you for all your work, all your medicine. I know deep in my being you are weaving with me. Thank you. Thank you. We are in this together.