In this episode of This Daring Adventure podcast, we dive into how to overcome the hidden dramas that keep many women entrepreneurs stuck in their business ventures.

I share insights into how our brains disguise fear as preparation or perfectionism to protect us from perceived risks. I highlight the importance of taking imperfect action to move forward, and I outline the financial, time, and energy costs of staying stuck in an endless cycle of preparation.

By leveraging your experience, focusing on providing value, and getting external support through coaching to build confidence and create the business and life you truly desire.

Key Moments:

00:39 Identifying the Hidden Drama

01:23 Client Story: Sarah's Struggle

03:13 The Fear Behind the Drama

08:54 The Cost of Drama

12:14 Breaking the Cycle

13:21 Action Steps to Move Forward

14:17 Reconnecting with Your Success

16:40 The Value of Coaching

19:45 Final Thoughts and Next Steps

Connect with me:

Ready to go deeper? Book your free consult call and let's talk about how you can finally break through the patterns keeping you stuck in your business and life. Your next level is calling - will you answer? Book your call here.

Instagram: tristaguertincoaching

Website: www.tristaguertin.com

LinkedIn: Trista Guertin | LinkedIn

Ready to end the people-pleasing? Get my Validation Shift mini-course HERE. USE COUPON CODE TAKE5 to receive $5 off the price.

Welcome to This Daring Adventure podcast

where we work on bridging the gap between

2

where we are and where we want to be in

order to live a bigger and bolder life.

3

In this podcast, we will provide

inspiration, tips, and skills

4

you need to make your life the

adventure you want it to be.

5

Here's your host, mindset

mentor, and life coach, Tri

6

Trista: Hey everybody.

7

Welcome back to This Daring Adventure.

8

So today I'm going to dive right into

a topic which keeps a lot of women in

9

their business feeling stuck and hiding

themselves and holding themselves

10

back, and it is cleverly disguised

by our brain, and most of us don't

11

even realize that it's happening.

12

We just think that it's all fact and

it's real, but in actuality it's not.

13

And so we're going to dive deep into this

and help you to clean some of that up so

14

that you can move forward and go to that

next level in your business and in your

15

life, and create whatever it is you want.

16

So here's what I heard from

my client, Sarah, last week.

17

She is 52 and she has 20 years of

corporate experience, and she has

18

been planning to launch her consulting

business for three years, three years.

19

And she's talking about getting

her website perfect first and

20

finishing a certification, doing

some more market research, and then

21

figuring out her pricing strategy

and what she's going to charge.

22

And she was going to go on and I finally

just cut her off and said, listen stop,

23

because this probably sounds familiar

to you and it's very familiar to me.

24

We make this long laundry list of things

that we need to do, that need to be done

25

well, if not perfectly, before we can

put ourselves out there, before we can

26

take the action that we want to take,

and before we really dive into offering

27

our services, creating our business, or

28

making that or creating, or for those

of you who are experienced and already

29

established businesswomen, it can stop

you from taking that next step and from

30

really putting yourself out there, you

might be just operating at a minimal

31

level, but holding yourself back from

going after what you really want.

32

So here's what I told Sarah and what

she didn't realize, and maybe what you

33

don't realize, either the drama that

you're creating around your business,

34

whether you're starting or whether

you're already established, isn't because

35

you're trying to be thorough, or you're

a perfectionist or you're professional.

36

It's fear.

37

Now, let me tell you that endless cycle of

preparation, perfection, and postponement,

38

that's not you being smart or strategic.

39

That is your brain creating

drama to protect you.

40

It's protecting you from failure.

41

It's protecting you from risk, and it's

protecting you from actually succeeding.

42

Our brains are wired for

survival, not success.

43

And you have probably survived decades

of challenges, disappointments,

44

maybe even some failures, and your

brain has cataloged every single one.

45

And now, when you want to create

something new, something bigger,

46

something bolder than you have before,

your brain goes into overdrive and it

47

starts thinking, what if I fail publicly?

48

What if I'm too old?

49

What if I don't have what it takes?

50

What if I fail?

51

And so instead of letting you take

the action that you say you want

52

to take and risk finding out what

your capacity is, your brilliant

53

mind creates elaborate dramas.

54

Suddenly you need six more

months to, in quotes, get ready.

55

You need another course,

you need another coach.

56

You need another plan.

57

You need

58

another program.

59

You need another offer, you need another

freebie, you need whatever it is.

60

And I've done that myself.

61

I know for sure I have

done that for myself.

62

I.

63

Especially in the beginning, first few

years of my business, thinking that

64

there was this one perfect lead magnet

or this one perfect podcast episode

65

or this one perfect Instagram post or

email or program that I could create

66

that would change everything, that

would create that business, that would

67

bring people in, that would create that

success that I had been thinking about.

68

And I kept creating and

creating and changing my mind.

69

And it's sort of that

shiny object syndrome.

70

Well, maybe this, I could try this

and I need to do this, and then,

71

then when I get that, it'll be ready.

72

And I.

73

I see that now I can look back in

retrospect, especially from the first few

74

years of my business thinking it didn't

need to be that complicated and it could

75

have been a lot more straightforward and

probably I needed just, 1, 2, 3 things.

76

To put myself out there and to make offers

and to offer my services to people as a

77

coach, instead of making it so complicated

and spinning my wheels and just

78

getting stuck in the drama in my head.

79

It's easy for me to say that now because

I can look back at it and see, and having

80

a business at that time was so new to me.

81

It's hard to make sense of it.

82

It's hard to see.

83

You're still trying to figure all things

out and learn and discover and create.

84

But I can tell you now, it doesn't

have to be that complicated.

85

And there is a lot of drama that

our brain creates in order to

86

hold us back and we buy into it.

87

We think it's real.

88

It feels very real, so it makes

sense that we buy into it.

89

but I really want you to be

aware of what's going on, not

90

that anything has gone wrong.

91

It's just not helpful for you, and

we can eliminate a lot of that drama,

92

eliminate a lot of that stalling and

that stuckness, and move you forward

93

towards what you really want to create

94

'cause it's possible.

95

And so here's how this pattern

destroys your confidence as a female

96

entrepreneur when you're in your fifties.

97

First, it creates a false

narrative about your capabilities.

98

Every day you delay taking action.

99

You're unconsciously telling

yourself, I'm not ready yet.

100

I don't have what it takes.

101

And this starts to undermine

your confidence and erodes

102

it away from the inside out.

103

Second, it might reinforce

some age related doubts.

104

You might feel that you still need

to prepare because you're thinking

105

maybe you've missed your window.

106

Maybe it's too late for you.

107

Maybe you're just not going to be able to

figure this out and make this a success,

108

and that's okay, but it's not helpful.

109

I.

110

Third, it disconnects you from your

greatest asset, which is your experience.

111

You start viewing your decades

of knowledge as insufficient

112

instead of invaluable.

113

I want you to remember that regardless of

what you've done in the past, all of what

114

you've learned, all of your experience,

all of your skills can be helpful.

115

You forget that you've already solved

problems, probably managed some teams

116

navigated crises you've been doing.

117

You can figure this out.

118

And then let's talk about what this

drama is actually costing you because.

119

I think the price is higher

than you actually realize.

120

First, there's the financial cost.

121

Every month you spend getting

ready is a month that you're

122

not earning from your expertise.

123

And if your business can generate

even $5,000 a month once it's

124

launched, once launched, that year

of preparation just cost you $60,000.

125

But here's what's worse.

126

You're also spending money on the

drama, another course, another

127

certification, another book,

whatever, to help you get ready.

128

And I've seen women spend $20,000

or more on preparation for a

129

business that they never launched.

130

Second, there's a time cost.

131

Look, time isn't just money, but

it's your most precious resource

132

that year that you've spent

researching, putting things together.

133

You cannot get that back.

134

Every day you delay means that

you're not building the business

135

and the life that you want.

136

And whether that's more investment

in yourself, whether that is,

137

whether that is putting together new

programs, whether that is travel, whether

138

that is investing, whether that is

buying the home or the car that you want.

139

You're putting that off.

140

Third is the energy cost, and this

is key because drama is exhausting.

141

All of that mental energy spent

on what if scenarios spinning out.

142

All that emotional energy drained by

perfectionism, all that creative energy

143

wasted on endless planning, that's energy

you could be using to serve clients,

144

to generate revenue, to build momentum.

145

But it's being lost.

146

It's leaking out, But here's the cost

that I think is the most important.

147

You're robbing yourself

of your next level.

148

Right now there's a version of

you living at your full potential.

149

She's confident, profitable, and making

the impact that you want to make.

150

But every day that you stay

stuck in drama is another day.

151

You're not becoming her.

152

And that emotional cost

will compound daily.

153

Every day you don't act on your

vision, you lose a little more

154

belief in yourself, and it becomes

harder to move yourself forward.

155

You start to wonder if you're mistaken.

156

You think maybe everyone else

is right and you should just

157

be grateful for what you have.

158

But grateful for what?

159

For hiding your gifts, for playing small,

for letting fear make your decisions,

160

for not going after what you really want.

161

No.

162

So how do you break this cycle?

163

How do you stop creating drama and start

creating the results that you really want?

164

First, recognize that drama

is fear in designer clothes.

165

When you catch yourself saying, I

just need to, or I should probably,

166

or maybe I should wait until, pause

yourself, catch yourself, and ask,

167

what am I really afraid of here?

168

What am I putting off really doing?

169

Why am I holding myself back here?

170

Second, remember that imperfect action

beats perfect inaction every single time.

171

your first website doesn't

need to win design awards.

172

Your first client doesn't need to be

Fortune 500, and your first launch doesn't

173

need to be flawless, but it's taking

that action and moving yourself forward,

174

which is going to help you to create

success eventually sooner, if not later.

175

So here's your first action step,

and I want you to do this right away.

176

It's the 24 hour rule.

177

Right now, think of one action you've

been postponing for your business.

178

Just one.

179

Maybe it's setting up that LinkedIn

profile, sending that email to potential

180

client or registering your business name.

181

Here's what you're going to do.

182

You have 24 hours to take that

one action, not to perfect

183

it, not to research it more.

184

Just to do it.

185

Set a timer on your phone right

now for 24 hours from now.

186

And when it goes off, that

action needs to be complete.

187

Why 24 hours?

188

Because it's short enough that your

brain can't create elaborate drama around

189

it, but long enough that you can't use.

190

I don't have the time

right now as an excuses.

191

Here's what I want you to understand.

192

You are not starting from scratch.

193

You're not too late, you're not behind.

194

It's not about whether you have what it

takes, if you don't have the capacity.

195

You have experience.

196

You can build the business that you want.

197

You know how to navigate relationships.

198

You know how to manage complexity.

199

You know how to make

decisions under pressure.

200

You have wisdom, you have credibility.

201

So here's your second action step.

202

Take 15 minutes and write down every

challenge you've solved in your career,

203

every project you've led, every crisis

you've managed, every team you've built,

204

or turn around and don't just list job

duties, but write down actual problems

205

that you solved and results you created.

206

It could be that time you

increased efficiency by 30%.

207

That project you brought under in.

208

That project you brought in under

budget, that team member you mentored

209

who got promoted, and it could be

that certification that you achieved.

210

it could be that degree you obtained.

211

It could be the podcast you

created, the client you've coached.

212

This is about reconnecting with

your track record of success.

213

Because when you see it all laid

out, you'll be giving your brain that

214

evidence and you'll realize you have

been successful throughout your career.

215

You have made achievements.

216

You are capable, you can

move yourself forward.

217

You can do this for yourself to move

yourself forward in your business.

218

The most successful women

entrepreneurs I work with have

219

made one crucial mindset shift.

220

They've stopped thinking, can I do this?

221

And they've started

thinking, how can I serve?

222

How can I provide value?

223

When you focus on the value you

can provide, the problems you

224

can solve, the difference you

can make the drama disappears.

225

Take the focus off of yourself

because it's no longer about you and

226

your fears, it's about the people

who need what you have to offer.

227

And I've done this myself with coaching.

228

I know that coaching is so

valuable and so powerful and so

229

important, and the difference that

it can make in everyone's life.

230

I would literally coach

everyone if I could.

231

At least I think everyone should

have a coach 'cause I know

232

what a difference it can make.

233

Especially as an entrepreneur or a coach,

a businesswoman, a consultant, an artist.

234

If you want to go to that next level,

you need some support and some help.

235

It's not because you're not capable, it's

not because you're not smart, but having

236

that support, having that objective view.

237

Of what's going on in your brain,

what you're not seeing, or what

238

you're spending too much time in.

239

What you're stuck in is invaluable.

240

If you want to create confidence,

if you want to get that clarity, if

241

you want to move yourself forward

into that next level, the best,

242

most effective way you can do it

is to get some support of a coach.

243

and so when I am talking about my

coaching, when I am making offers,

244

when I tell people about the value

that I can offer, I truly focus

245

on how it can change their lives.

246

There's nothing more devastating

to me than to do a consult with

247

someone who I know I can help

and who doesn't take me up on it.

248

Now, there could be a hundred

reasons why they don't.

249

But I know regardless, I can help take you

to that next level, and that to me is why

250

I'm showing up and why I do this and why I

can talk about the coaching the way I do.

251

And so I want you to do that

for yourself in your business,

252

regardless of what it is.

253

Believe in the value.

254

Know exactly what you have

to offer and focus on that.

255

The people out there need you.

256

They need what you have to offer.

257

And believe that a hundred percent or

work on that belief until you get there.

258

And by not putting yourself out there

and by not making offers and by not

259

offering your value to people, and

by staying stuck in preparation mode,

260

you're not just limiting yourself, but

then you're depriving your potential

261

clients of a service that they need.

262

Focus on that.

263

Focus on who you can help.

264

So here's what I want you to remember.

265

Your drama is just

wearing a business suit.

266

The endless planning, the

perfectionism, the just one more thing.

267

That's not professionalism.

268

It's just protection, and you

don't need the protection.

269

You need progress.

270

You don't need perfection.

271

You need practice.

272

You don't need to have it all figured out.

273

You need to take the next step.

274

So if this makes sense, if this

sounds like where you are getting

275

hung up, then I want you to consider

booking a consult call with me.

276

Let's talk about where you're holding

yourself back, where you need to

277

strengthen your confidence and to gain

some clarity in order to move forward.

278

Because if you're feeling like

you're meant for more, it's because

279

you are and you have a business,

something you want to offer people.

280

Let's get it out there.

281

Let's take you to the next level.

282

Let's create the business and

the life that you truly want.

283

No more endless planning.

284

no more perfectionism.

285

Just real progress towards

the business and the life that

286

you know you wanna create.

287

Because you can do this, you can

prove your brain wrong and show

288

yourself what you're truly capable of.

289

So the link will be in the show notes.

290

Book a time on my calendar and let's talk.

291

Don't hide behind the drama.

292

Be aware of what your

brain is offering you.

293

If it's not helpful, then let's change it.

294

Thanks everybody for listening.

295

I.

296

Thank you for listening to

This Daring Adventure podcast

297

with your host Trista Guertin.

298

We hope you enjoyed the tips

and conversations on how to

299

get excited about life Again.

300

As always, you can head

to tristaguertin.com

301

for additional resources and to

book a one-on-one coaching session.

302

You can also follow Trista on

Instagram at tristaguertincoaching

303

don't forget to subscribe, rate

and review us on Apple Podcasts.

304

Thanks again for tuning in

and we'll see you next time.