Ever find yourself on the cusp of change, but plagued with doubts and second-guessing? In this captivating episode of Real Estate Energized!, we unravel the journey of embracing change with confidence. Join Nicholas Nascimento and Dill Ward as they share their personal experiences and guide you through the process of overcoming fears and uncertainties. Learn how to identify your needs and wants, prepare for a major move, and communicate effectively with your loved ones. With practical tips and empowering insights, you'll discover the joy in exploring new realities and uncover the true essence of living. Tune in to this episode and dare to navigate the intricate landscapes of change with boldness and clarity.

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Is it time to move on? In today's episode, we'll help you navigate the intricate landscapes of change, choice, and new beginnings, helping you explore the pivotal question, when is the right time to embrace change and move forward in your life?

You're listening to Real Estate Energized!, where real estate meets real life. I'm Dill Ward.

And I'm Nicholas Nascimento, and we are not just realtors. We're your guides to the world of real estate with a deeper twist.

If you're thinking about moving sometime in the future, are already in motion with an upcoming move, or are a real estate professional who recognizes there's more depth to real estate than just a transaction, then join us on a journey as we unlock the real stories of personal growth that happens while buying and selling real estate.

Each week, we'll bring you unique perspectives and profound life lessons we've seen through our clients and our own experiences. Let's get started.

Do you remember that time, I came home with yet another small kitchen appliance.

You mean that, instant pot? It's not at all a small appliance, like a little cutting operating thing or a little apple chopper?

Yeah. I mean, I know it was our second one, but I was just really getting into cooking, and I just loved having all the gadgets. And I also remember when we both were like, where is this going to go? Like, this kitchen is so small, and you had already made a makeshift metal rack in the middle of it that look so cluttery, but it was a place to put all the stuff.

It was so tiny. There was, like, literally a half of a countertop.

And it had that weird bathroom in the closet where it was, like where it had that corner's sink that was, like, vintage. It is.

And we loved it. And it's like it's funny how you can love something, and then all of a sudden, one day, it just kind of erodes your joy. You suddenly are really frustrated about something, and it started, I know, with the kitchen and the storage issue. And then I was like, hey. The garage door is, like, falling off.

Well, falling off. The entire thing was about, like, a gust of wind from falling over itself. It wasn't ideal.

I know. And this is the thing. You can totally love something in somewhere that you're living or some area of your life. This can really be applied in any area of life, but we're talking about through the lens of real estate. But then one day, something just changes. Right? Even the neighborhood started to change. There was different activity going on that just wasn't in alignment with us. And I was like, that's it. We're moving.

You know, there is something to be said like, awkward relationships with neighbors where it's like, okay. I don't think we can handle this anymore.

And it's the one thing that you really can't control either. You know?

No. No. You can't stop crazy. You just can't. You know, that kind of, like, indicates that the environment you're in, it can feel like a static. But the reality is that there's so many different living situations. And sometimes, like, this even translates into, like, daily life. Like, you feel like the situation you're in in life is something that's just what you're stuck with, but you can go somewhere else and have a different experience just as easily.

Yeah. I think I've always been really good at noticing my discomforts or frustrations. I know that sometimes trying to get you on board or, you know, even through the lens of some of my clients, sometimes someone will come to me and say, I've been thinking about making a move, but I have no idea how to get my partner or my family on board with me.

I would definitely say that I recognize times where you've kind of, like you sat there and you've said something, and I'll be like, I kind of run a little bit of Italian and I’m like, okay. She didn't like that kitchen idea with the appliance, but let's see if it comes up again. And then, like, after I've heard it maybe once or twice, I'm like, okay. Maybe this is a thing. Maybe this is a real thing that's, like, significant and needs to be addressed. So, I have to, like, start getting malleable, like getting ready to get into change action, like to get mobile.

Yeah. I mean, it definitely requires a little bit of influence to set the stage for what the next iteration of life will be like. But I do love that most of the moves that we've made have been through choice and dreaming up a bigger reality or not even bigger, but just a different reality. A lot of the moves we've made have been specifically, to solve pain points.

Yeah. And that's a real scenario. Like, I remember the last time that I had to move, and it wasn't from choice. It was, like, when I was a kid, we were living in this house, it was on this cul-de-sac, and we had all these fun times there. And we had a lot of, like, really interesting experiences as kids, but we didn't know that the landlord or the owner of that house was in foreclosure and that they hadn't been paying their mortgage. We found out, basically, the day they said they were kicking us out, we were, like, totally flustered and having we had to make rushed decisions in a lot of ways, like being able to make the choice to move, is a lot better than waiting for that decision to be made for you.

A 100%. And, you know, so many moves involve very sad things, job loss, job change, death, divorce, so many sad reasons. But when you're in choice and you're in power and you're in making your own reality, that's, like, really living. That's really being able to dream up something that will serve you in a bigger way.

And, you know, that kind of reminds me of the experience we had right at the cusp of the pandemic. What was that?

Oh, yeah. When I started sending you listings, and you're like, oh, no. Oh, no. Here we go again with this. I mean, it's kind of a hazard of the job. We're both realtors. We pillow talk, kitchen, you know, remodels from listings that we saw. But I remember feeling like we were living in a pretty decent sized house in sort of a suburbia area. And we had these fantasies that people were going to come visit. They were going to stay with us and hang out. It just, it wasn't materializing. And I just felt like, wow. We're paying for so much space and utilities and everything, and no one's, you know, no one's coming.

And it had its own little playground, but, like, our kid wasn't really playing on it. There were so many things. We're like, everything about this is exactly what we need. But then we realized after a while, it was kind of not filling all the boxes as well as we dealt it with.

And then, of course, I got the wild hair to say, wouldn't it be really cool to live in, like, the urban core, and a swanky condo downtown, and just live a more simple life. Just get rid of all of our stuff. And I remember being like, hey. What do you think about this? And you're like, huh? And, you know, I warmed you up to it, and then, obviously, we made commitments to move. And then, of course, before we even could make the move, bum bum, bum, it was the pandemic.

Yeah. And every step of selling things during the pandemic was complicated. We had to, like, throw money at people, and people threw money at us. And we'd leave things in our garage and push it on unwield surfaces.

I know this was, like, right when nobody wanted to go near anybody. So, we're about to move into a condo building with an elevator.

You had to, like, wear a mask from your front door down to your car. It was the craziest times. But that's one of those things where sometimes decisions end up being complicated, and you end up having to endure the change. And that's not terribly easy, but it is something that's like it develops that core of, like, willpower.

I think you and I have noticed a pattern that I go through and you've learned to kind of accept, but it's like I go into this very energized, excited, daydreamy, everything's possible. Let's do this thing. And then I leap myself into the decision, and then you're on board, and we're moving forward. And it's almost like as soon as you get on board and we're moving forward, then I get terrified and start having all the doubts and just all the second guessing.

Which, you know, one of the things you can do to kind of counteract the doubts in advance is just getting a lot of clarity. Like, that time, we were sitting in that bar, in that restaurant.

Oh, yeah. That was one of our first moves. I remember I had this little ratty, little purple notebook in my bag, and I pulled it out. And I was like, okay. I think it was, like, 11 o'clock at night in some divey little bar. And I said, we're going to move somewhere and what are our nonnegotiable? Like, let's dream up what would be so great. And I remember how basic those items on the list were. It was like parking, somewhere to put the car. Right? Good light so that the plants would live, a kitchen that we felt inspired to cook in. And the list was just, you know, just kind of basic, you know, when you think about it, what humans need for basic survival. And I remember being really clear, like, okay. This is what we're going to go find. And I think we found it, like, almost instantly because we had our little checklist, and then we're like, okay. This, this, this. Yeah. This is it. Let's do it.

And a lot of reasons for why we knew it when we saw it was because we made the list of negotiables, the needs and the wants. We knew when we were okay with sacrificing something. Like, I think we opted for a place that didn't have a 2nd bedroom because the living room is big enough to be a guest bed if we needed it to be and things like that.

But we could walk to our favorite restaurant.

We could go to, like, normal haunts, so they say. And I think that it's critical to take that in part of your preparation steps, so getting clarity. But then there's other things to prepare for.

Well, especially if you have a more complex life. You know, if you have a couple kids in school districts or you've got crazy travel and work and all these things, like, life is still going on even when you're wanting to make a big change. So, setting out a framework for a time frame that will support you.

You know, that includes just, like, maybe even building up a down payment or just building up anticipation of an oncoming move. Like, I think there was a time where we realized, well, we can't move this month or next month. We can't move the months after that, but soon we're going to know if we can move, and then we're going to, like, jump on the 1st opportunity. And when you're ready and you've done that planning, and you've done that preparation, and the mental step is the only thing that remains in your preparation.

I know, for me, I know that it's the time when I cannot stop thinking about it, when it just won't go away. I'll go to bed. I'll wake up in the morning, and, again, I'm like, I wonder what else is out there, and you find yourself just looking at listings or looking around. It just doesn't go away. That's how you know.

And when you're experiencing that, you can hold that energy as motivation to maybe even find some adaptation in your mindset about what's in front of you and what your options are. Like, maybe what your hopes are a little bit off the mark.

I also love how every time we have switched up things, how it puts us in new paradigms with money and what our new expenses are going to be, and what our routine's going to be, and where our coffee shop's going to be, and just, like, how much it challenges your brain to stretch and bend into ways that you didn't even know were possible.

Yeah. One of my mentors and, favorite inspirational speakers, Brendon Burchard, said that he likes to travel because, like, it's that stretching of the brain that encourages growth. Like, the exploration mentality gives you that renewed sense of, like, you can do it. You can figure out a new paradigm. You can figure out how to navigate something you've never experienced before. But then the next phase of that is that, like, once you've got past your ability to adapt and your preparations, now you kind of have to make sure you have everybody on board with you on what your future goals are going to be. Like, the times you teased me with all those houses in the morning, you sit there and just I know what's happening, and I've kind of mentally resolved myself. Okay. We're going to move. But I see that you've sent me, like, 5 places, and I'm like, okay. Well, this one says it's 2 bedrooms, but that 2nd bedroom is obviously just a grandiose closet. So, that's not going to work.

I know. It's so funny. Everyone is, like, the hotline person. Right? Well, if you're not in a relationship, you have someone in your life, some friend or sister. There's somebody you just can't stop randomly sending stuff to. It's like a cat meme and then a property and then a this and that. That's like, but it's so important that you dream a little bit. Right? Like, you don't know what you don't know until you start looking and thinking. If you don't want to be where you are, the only way to figure out where you want to go is to explore and to recognize that the discomfort you have is giving you an opportunity to lean into a new way of living. You have to find the right people to support you. You have to be mindful that the people that you're asking are not self-interested to keep you where you are.

Like that neighbor who's, like, your best friend. And if you move, like, further than 3 blocks from their house, they're worried about, like, that you won't ever talk to them again. Like, they might have a little bit of a personal interest in you never leaving that house.

Yes. And I want to remind you out there that realtors are kind of like driveway life coaches. Like, we love helping people just dream up something that's months or years away because it has to start with an idea. Like, that's the thing. It's a process, and you've got to get the key people in your life assembled as you're getting excited about something different.

And then, you know, when you have somebody, it's also good to practice communicating what your needs are and being very relevant or being open about sharing like, hey. These are my needs. These are my wants, and then helping them understand how they can help you in moving forward through that process.

In getting buy in, I always work on like, so if I have a client comes to me, and they have a family or a partner or somebody that's just not quite ready. They still kind of like where they live. They're not they're not dreaming up the big thing yet. I love to say, well, let's find out what it is that they want and they could dream about because you get their buy ins so much faster when you understand what could change to me? And sometimes it's like, you know, cutting back on finances or being closer to family or something that hasn't even really been discussed because it hasn't been an option on the table. But now that they are getting presented with an opportunity to dream it up, it's really fascinating what comes out.

Yeah. In a lot of ways, there are people who are in a position where perhaps they're moving from living with their own family to having to move in with a parent or desiring to bring more community closer to them so they maybe are looking for ways to share their life or, you know, work on an atypical life situation, and it's good to get to discuss that transition and to try and find people who are unbiased, like real estate agents, who are motivated by you finding that next phase or by finding somebody who is purely just interested in you being happy.

Yeah. And I think you really can't underestimate the impact of making changes. I know that for so many people, making changes is really scary and really hard, but just embracing your desire to make a change is so valuable.

Absolutely. So, there's this thing we like to talk about, which is, like, pursuing options. You know, it's an idea that there's always more life to live out there.

There are more ways to set up your kitchen. There are more areas of town. You could live in a big house or a little house or this country or that country or this state, there's everywhere. There are so many choices.

Yeah. Every single house is different. Every single neighborhood has a different feel. Every single street has a different aesthetic to it. And the more exposure you have to those things, the more breadth you have to understanding your own life.

I mean, I remember one takeaway for me during the pandemic was how many people were making just drastic changes because they could suddenly didn't have to commute to the office. Kids weren't reporting to school. I was wildly impressed with many families that we, you know, sold their house, and they took a couple kids and a couple dogs and took off in an RV and when to reimagine what life looks like.

I can't help but think that those kind of stories in mind, that those are opportunities to really, like, give space for your personal understandings of the world to just grow and for you to give room to develop as a person. New skills and new emotions that you may not have had a whole lot of access to.

Well, as we wrap up here, what are some of the key takeaways that we covered?

Well, we talked about acknowledging your discomforts as opportunities for growth.

Basically, like, own your pain. Own your frustrations.

Yeah. You know? Call them out. Identify them. Give them some amount of, like, value. Because if we don't, if we suppress our emotions, then we just keep feeling more and more like it eats at us. And, really, it's just like people want to be helpful. They want you feel happy and, like, you're growing.

I think the best way to say it is, like, it erodes your joy. And just some examples. Like, if you live in a place that's too dark and you're someone that's really sensitive to light or it's always cold or it's always too hot or there's just not enough space for the hobbies or the passions that you really want to pursue or the family you really want to have or whatever. Like, those are the things that you don't realize underline and undermine your happiness.

And then the other thing is that it's critical to do some preparation. Do some planning. Research the area you think you want to move to or research the change you want to make and find out what the trade-offs are of that move. Like, if you want to move into a condo from living in a house, like, you're going to lose some of the perks you had in the house and vice versa. You have trade-offs you have to plan for, and you have to prepare yourself by being clear about your needs.

And develop a totally new level of resilience. Check out our episode on developing your resilience because there's going to be some setbacks. It's not a straight line through of an idea to execution. You have to rock yourself into place to keep going.

Absolutely. And then most importantly, maybe, is just finding the support and communicating if you need more or less help from friends and family. Because, let's be honest. Not every friend and family are helpful.

Amen.

But when you got somebody who you know is, like, rooting for you and they're going to, like, be there every step of the way, you got to, like, lean and let them know exactly what it is you need from them so that they can do the thing that they want to do as your friend and loved one and be supportive.

And as always, if you're thinking about making a move, we'd love to support you. Check the show notes for a bunch of resources in ways that we can stay connected.

As we close the door on another incredible episode of Real Estate Energized!, we want to express our heartfelt gratitude to you, our listeners. If you're looking to buy or sell real estate anywhere, and need a great agent or you are an inspired agent yourself. Connect with us.

We hope you found inspiration and insight in this episode. Remember, real estate is not just about walls and roofs. It's about the stories and dreams that fill those spaces.

Stay tuned for more exciting stories and life lessons in the episodes to come. And if you have a unique real estate story or topic, you'd like us to explore, reach out in the links below in the show notes.

Until next time. Keep dreaming, keep growing, and keep finding joy in the journey. Thanks for joining us on Real Estate Energized!