Johnny Sirpilla is Dr. Brad Miller's guest on Episode 221 of "The Beyond Adversity Podcast."

He is an author, speaker, and entrepreneur that aims to help businesses, communities, and universities in encouraging growth, development, and inspire others.

He also wrote the book entitled, “Life is Hard but I'll Be OK: The Power of Hope Emerging through Pain and Learning to Live with Gratitude.”

Johnny and his wife, Susan, has faced an adversity in their lives that truly challenged them. It took them years to get pregnant. They had to go through fertility treatments. However, when they did, the babies didn’t make it. They all passed away due to prematurity. They had triplets whom they named: Nicholas, Mary, and Peter. 

Episode 221 of the Beyond Adversity Podcast is for those people who are going through hardships in life and are trying to discover the reason why they are experiencing it. This is for those people who are trying to find ways in overcoming their adversities in life.

They questioned themselves why this happened and why did they have to go through it. They had to go through therapy in order to overcome their adversities. Although even before, they were already undergoing therapy due to the hardships they had to face to have children. 

Over time they were able to find their true purpose in life and it led them to who they are today.

In this episode, Johnny talks about the adversities in life that he had to go through and what he did to overcome them. He also talks about his book, and the reason why he wrote them.  

"The Beyond Adversity Podcast with Dr. Brad Miller is published weekly with the mission of helping people "Grow Through What They Go Through" as they navigate adversity and discover their promised life of peace, prosperity, and purpose. 

https://www.encourage33.com/

Book: https://www.amazon.com/Life-Hard-but-Ill-Gratitude-ebook/dp/B0B45DKBCZ 

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/johnnysirpilla/?hl=en 

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/johnny-sirpilla-45385253/

Our guest today is Johnny Sirpilla. He is the author of the book

Life is Hard but I'll Be OK, and the subheading is The Power of

Hope Emerging through Pain and Learning to Live with Gratitude.

We've got a lot to talk about here today. And I'm gonna just going

to leave it right there in terms of introduction, because I really only

get in our conversation. But Johnny Sirpilla, welcome to Beyond Adversity.

Thank you, Brad. Thank you for having me.

It is awesome to to have you indeed here, Johnny. Haven't had the

pleasure of reading your book yet. But I know it's been a very popular

book, and it's on some of the bestseller list and it touches a nerve, I

believe about a lot of people who understand that life is a challenge

and it's hard. But not everybody thinks it's going to be okay. Because

sometimes people think they're going to get stuck and they're just going

to, their life dissolves into a disaster, and they get stuck. And that's part

of the purpose of this podcast is to help people get through that. And

they haven't seen necessarily hope or gratitude and that type of thing.

Let's talk about that a little bit. And particularly Johnny, I know it's a

challenge. But almost everybody goes through challenges in life.

And I know a pivotal moment for you was a dramatic challenge that

you had a great adversity you had, which led in many ways to what

this book is all about and what your life is all about.

You might go on there with me a little bit friends with

until a little bit about your life, but how some pivotal

moments led to what you're doing now.

Absolutely. So my wife and I were married young, in our

early 20s. And by 25, when we were trying to have a family,

we were not able to and it took a number of years, through

a lot of fertility treatments to get pregnant, and we got

pregnant with triplets and our dreams were just, we

were beyond excited. The dreams were coming true.

And later into the pregnancy, our son, our bottom son,

Nicholas, his water broke, and my wife ended up going

into labor. And after about a week or so, Nicholas, Mary

and Peter were born. We have two sons and a daughter.

And unfortunately, none of them made it, they all passed

away. So after years of trying, we think we win the lottery,

and then, you know, we lose all three of them due to

prematurity. And, you know, Brad, that's where I love the

title of your podcast Beyond Adversity, because, you know,

I do believe that life is hard. I talk about that when I do

public speaking engagements. The title of this book came

from a senior in college that when I was speaking about

four or 500 seniors at a university, somebody asked what

they wish they knew when I was in their seat. And my reply,

as distilling and maybe as negative as it sounded was I wish

I knew that life would be hard. And I'd be okay. And so for

us in that adversity, we thought after Nicolas, Mary and

Peter died, that we hit our low, and probably it was, but

then there was a lot of other lows that followed. And

there was a total of 13 different scenarios of different

children that came in and out of our lives before we

became parents, and so we continue to struggle. And so

I guess, you know, when I think about getting beyond that

adversity and feeling like we're at our low, but we're really

not because then a new low comes, and then a new low

comes in years continue like this. For me, I have to find

purpose in that pain, I cannot accept, and I would not accept.

At that time, in my late 20s, when Nicholas, Mary and Peter

died, I would not accept that this was the life that my wife

and I were destined to lead. And so, you know, that's where

we have to go beyond those adversities and find the purpose

in our pain. Find those silver linings of blessings, and I can

promise you through a lot of work and therapy and commitment

from my wife and I, we found so much beauty, even in the time

Nicholas, Mary and Peter, we're alive that we're

incredibly thankful for today.

Wow. What a poignant story in a moment, and I

can relate to some degree with you, Johnny, my.

I'm not sure what stage of prematurity your children

were born with my other daughter who was born six

and a half weeks premature and was less than three

pounds when she was born, and had many medical

issues. And the flip side of what we've talked about

here is now that you know she's 36 and I have two

grandchildren from her, but I can still remember those

days very pointedly of her going through that time.

And so I just want to say before we go too far, for you

and your wife, I'm sorry. You know, I just feel I'm just so

sorry that this happened to you and and then do multiply

that by whatever the scenarios are you said 13 different

scenarios of having children and just want an anguishing

time. And I just want to say I'm sorry. And that I'm so glad

and happy that you found some pathway forward. Because

I've been involved with ministry for many years as a retired

pastor and dealt with a number of situations where people

have had premature children and other life events where

they get stuck, and they are devastated. I know of at least

one situation where person never really recovered from that.

And they live many years later, but they never really recovered

from that episode. Let's talk for a minute. You mentioned

some things here, in your comments a minute ago, Johnny,

but what you did, you chose to try to find some purpose or

some moments of joy out of this purpose out of pain. Tell us

about some of the actions then that you did. To work that

process. You know, you obviously, you didn't dissolve in the

you didn't just pull the covers up completely. Maybe you did

some of that. But you took some action. Tell us a bit about

what sort of things that you and your wife did?

Well, first of all, we were heavily engaged in therapy

together, it was very important to us that the statistics

after a child dies, for a couple of staying together are

pretty grim. And so we were presented that statistic,

the night before the funeral, by some caring people

that reached out to us and we were already in therapy,

because of the time of the years of infertility and how

taxing and wearing that was on us. And so we just

doubled down with our psychologist, Dr. Barbara Fordyce,

who's a dear friend of mine and business partner today we

do a lot of public speaking together. And but again, this

was 27 years ago, that we were working through this, and

we just sought help. And we took that help. We didn't fight

it. And I think Brad, one of the things that helped us is, we

went into it with a mindset that so many people were saying,

I'm sure you're saying, Why me? We never thought that

somehow we were blessed to walk into therapy ahead of

that decision or that question. We didn't get stuck there.

Because why not me. There's awful things happening to

everyone in the world all the time, and beautiful things

happening to people all over the world all the time.

And we've had some beautiful things happen. And we've

had some awful things happen. So we don't get to just

choose all the beauty side of it. And so we were okay

with that. We didn't question that. And matter of fact,

one of the chapters in my book is entitled, Why not us?

And so we operated from that framework first, which I

think it gave us a leg up, if you will, on therapy. Because

we weren't stuck in that rut. We were above that. Insane.

Yes, this happened to us. And we can accept that.

Well, there we Romolo. But if you go into with a positive

attitude, an open attitude, if you're defensive at all, or

if one party wants to win party doesn't, it's really tough.

Like that's right, we went in as a team and brought BB

into that team with us. And we wanted together to get

to happier days that we weren't spending so much time

at the cemetery, daily, weekly, and finding the ways to

move forward. One of the ways that we had to do that

is you know, reframe our thoughts through cognitive

behavioral therapy, we learned some really important

reframing techniques of how we can take a thought

and change it in our mind to reframe it to one that we

can accept the one we don't like, to the one that we can

accept. And so for us, it's kind of that you know, concept,

all of us today know about PTSD, post traumatic stress

syndrome. We were looking then for that post traumatic

growth, we were looking for that opportunity to take

something that was so wrong and hurt us so badly and

say, God, I'm not going to allow this to just be in our lives

as a tragedy. And more importantly, Brad, I think, because

it wasn't about us, it was about honoring Nicholas, Mary, and

Peter, we were not going to allow their lives to be defined as a

tragedy and be defined on the time between the birth and

death certificate. We wanted to honor them in a in a better

way than that. And so that forced us to start looking at them

differently, and not as this traumatic loss, but starting to

think about the amazing blessing that we had. And there

was something really beautiful when we were able to hold

our kids entire lives in our hands from beginning to end, just

the five of us. And as sad as it was while it was happening,

we were the happiest people in that hospital. It was, there

was just gratitude. I mean, we saw the gifts that God

created for us. And so, you know, we talked about that

yet, then we did immediately go back to sadness. And so

part of that reframing of our thoughts was, well, why

can't we just stay on the gratitude part? Why we always

want more of everything, if it's good food, we want more

of that, if it's money, we want more of that. If it's somebody

to love, we want more of that. But why can't we say, this

was enough? And I'm thankful for it. And that's what we

started doing. And the more we said it, the more we

believed it. And the more we felt just so blessed to be

Nicholas, Mary, Peters parents.

Sure. So you kind of doubled down on gratitude. Is that

what I'm hearing you hear? You say, Johnny, you kind

of really went heavy on the gratitude, and embracing

what was instead of what wasn't?

That's right. Absolutely, we did, Brad, because the

alternative was too painful. Yeah, I mean, it just was

too dark. Laying, I spent so much time laying on that

ground at the cemetery, because I felt, you know, I was

six feet away from them. And it just felt as a new parent,

as we were prepared to be up all night, and, you know,

trying to get three babies to sleep and all those things.

Sure.

It just felt like that's where I belonged. And, but God

had other purpose and intent for me part of it, I think,

was writing this book, and to be able to help others who

gets stuck when life is hard, and they can't move beyond adversity.

Wow, that's so awesome, you know, the end. But part of

what's going on here is the very radically intentional

part of this because it's because they we can be really

dissolved, you know, the the other forces, you know,

resentment, and bitterness, and all kinds of things can

reach up and grab us and drag us down. And that's not

where that's not the healthiest place to be, you do you

can't spend your life prone on that grave. That's just not

where it's going to be in probably, those three children

don't want you to be in that state either. That's lifted up

their lives in a really great way.

You just said something important about resentment.

And, you know, we were three of our closest friends

were pregnant when we were pregnant, and we were

all due the same time.

Sure.

And, you know, we were determined, because they were

so wonderful to us, and they were so feeling our pain,

you know, my wife's best friends, three of them coming

to the funeral. And as pregnant as my wife was, I mean,

you know, that that's not a happy place for a pregnant

woman to go into a funeral parlor or, or into the church

or be at the hospital when they were born as they are

were. And so, you know, we knew that they were there

for us and our sadness. And it was very simple and clear

to us that we needed to be there for them in their joy.

So, you know, one of those births happen about 10 days

after the funeral. And we were determined to be there

at the hospital, the same hospital that we just delivered

at two weeks prior. And we were determined to be

there for them, because they deserved and of course,

they didn't expect it. But they deserved from us the

same care of it, and attention back that they gave to

us. And so what we saw that there was no connection

to our sorrow in their joy, other than we mutually felt it

for each other. And so we only knew the right thing to

do was to express that joy for them. So as they would

want to comfort us in that moment of their child's

birth, it was no, no. This is all for you. And so that's

where we're going to stay and it took discipline.

Sure.

Without a doubt, most of those visits ended Brad

with us going to the cemetery. But while we were

present with them, that was important to us. And

we did have our moments holding their babies where

we had a motion, sure of a budget of you know, I think

that's it's a way though, to help us keep moving forward

and beyond that adversity. And I'm going to keep using

your title for your show, because that's exactly where we

were and we, you know, had to get beyond that.

Well, that's awesome. And well. Well, what I reflect with

you here at meta Johnny, I hear at least three things that

you did, you took actions that you took you continue to

with your therapy, what you were doing prior to this

event and keeps on doing it and now you're writing

books and doing things with your therapist. So that's

an ongoing part of your life. And you certainly advocate

that so that's that's great. And you also chose to be kind

of radical in your attitude towards gratitude. And even

when you may not have been feeling all that great fall,

you still express gratitude. And that's awesome. And then

the other thing I would share with you that I think is a

little bit unusual that you didn't, your whatever bitterness,

resentment may have been there, it didn't consume you

in the sense of how you still chose to be active in engaging

with others. And I see this so often where people withdrawal,

you've probably seen this too, where people withdraw,

because it's so terribly painful. You know, the person

who go through the divorce, doesn't want to hang

around with their married friends anymore, the person

who has a death in the family doesn't want to be with

people, somebody, whatever, you know, a number of

things. So that that's awesome. So I appreciate you

talking about the actions that you took. And I want to

talk about an action or an aspect that I think is so important

as well, in what we're talking about here. And I think it's a part

of your story. And you'll have to help me out here a little bit. What

connection if, if any, was there to a higher power or a sense of

a connection to God or meditation or anything along this line,

that was a part of your process, because a lot of times when

bad things happen, people get mad at God, or they get mad,

or they further you know, credit, withdrawal from from this type

of thing. But tell me about any aspects of spiritual life that had

to do with this process for you?

Well, probably the most, the closest we've probably ever felt to

God, and we never had anger at God. Again, you know, we

know that God is a loving God, we know that he does not

promise us a life, free of pain, or anxiety or trials. And so we

understand that going in. And we knew that God did not do

this to us. There's freewill on this earth, things happen. And we

know God is there for us. So we saw that clear distinction, the

time that they were alive, again, was the closest probably that

we've ever felt to God, it was so beautiful. And we were very

joyful. We found our faith to be what was going to continue

to carry us through because as the book describes, you know,

life threatening medical situations happening to my wife later

in future pregnancies, in adoptions internationally, that were

challenging that were our lives were at risk in a foreign country.

You know, so many things that happen in this book that happened

in our lives that I write about in the book, you know, really put us

in a spot to just keep saying to God, you know, God, I prayed so

hard to get Susan pregnant and keep Susan pregnant, and all

those things. And then we changed our prayer, about halfway

through this journey to, you know, God, we surrender, send us

the kids that you want us to raise from whatever woman is

going to give birth to them, through my wife through someone

else, wherever in the world, any color, anything. Race, from any

place in the world, you send us our children that were meant to

raise. And that's really when our lives changed. When the good

for God's plan for us, as opposed to me as a control freak, that

I am a guy with high anxiety and a type eight, driving personality,

started happening, when we opened ourselves up, ultimately,

which worked great in my business career. But when I let go, and

let God and then things really manifested, still were challenging,

right, still were really difficult and a lot of ups and downs.

But he was right there with us through it all.

And just to just to kind of complete the circle there, you does

end up with you having more children, through their through

adoption and other through adoption. So you have just to

clarify you have how many children now at this point,

we have three children, one of them is adopted. I told my kids,

I don't recall which one of them is, but we're pretty sure I

got a file somewhere that tells us but yeah, so Bo is our

oldest. He's 26. Actually bows adopted. And then Bella in

stone came within less than three years after that. And so

we ended up with three children under the age of four.

Well, hey, yay, God, and you had the blessing that

happened that way. And as you said, you know, to let

go and let God. When you surrender, often things happen.

And so many times I've experienced this myself, people

who you know, just like what you said you for whatever

the circumstances were you had an adoption and an

end to natural born children. And that type of thing

just seems to happen oftentimes, and and so so did

you have that blessing in your life of your children?

And so you have the blessings in your life of your wife

and you've carried your life together. You've had the

blessings in your life of your Faith. And now you're

trying to get turn your blessings around and to share

it with other people. And so let's talk for a minute here

about how you have applied these lessons in your life.

And how that can be applicable to other people. What

I'm talking about here now, Johnny is any disciplines, any

habits, any lifestyle situations, spiritually, physical healthwise,

leadership, business wise, anything that's kind of transformed

and shifted in your life that you have what you live your life

now is particular how you can maybe share that with others,

I'm talking disciplines, habits, practices, things like this.

Tell us about that a little bit.

Absolutely, Brad. You know, again, as I said earlier, the

purpose for the pain I was continually looking for that. So

I wanted to apply what I felt what I learned, and when I

realized the epiphanies that I was having, of how my life

needs to be now that I hit this low. And I know truly what

the hardest degree of sadness is. There was an empathy in

me that came out of desire, I think God put it on my heart

to really change the business executive that I was, and I was

running a family business, a nice size company. And I started

immediately making changes there, because I recognize that I

did not have an environment in my company that was ultimately

creating happiness and joy for my associates that when they go

home to play their most important role as a family member or a

caregiver, that I was putting them in the best frame of mind when

they go home. And I recognized as a leader, that at the time, I

only had 70 employees. As my career went on, I had over

10,000 employees. And what I recognized was that in their

work hours, when I had high demands and high expectations

from them, I needed to be creating a culture that lifted them

up, that made them feel valued and appreciated. And so that

they have the best frame of mind when they go home.

Because if not, if I exert negativity and control over them,

or allow my team or my managers or create that culture

that's negative, when they go home, and they have the

opportunity to exert the power that they have at their

home, and they treat people poorly, whether it's their

husband, their wife, their children, whoever it might be

their parents, some of that's on me in the late in the

leadership that I allowed in our company. So the

application that I used for all of these thoughts that

I had was a clarity of how I wanted my heart to be.

And that's the same heart that I have at home, because

we have one mind and one heart, and I have to

bring that same mind and heart to work. So if I'm

going to be a good loving guy at home, then when

I go to work, I gotta be that same guy, and vice versa.

And let me ask you something about this from a business

perspective, because some people might push back on

you can say that oh, man, God, that's kind of soft.

You know, that's not how we do business. This is not the

way it's done. But I'm going to take a shot here with you

that when you made these adjustments, and how you did

business with your employees, and in your environment,

of being having this trust and accountability that way.

Didn't really hurt the bottom why did it, your business

still did okay? All right?

Yeah, the businesses grew incredibly. And I can tell you,

Brad, no one has ever said about me, but I'm too soft, as

a business leader. But what I hope that they say to me

is that I'm respectful of them, that I will have tough

conversations, because it's important to me to be honest

and real with people and never mess with their minds. I

would tell my leaders, my team, I will never mess with you,

I do have very high expectations. And that's part of that is in

terms of how we treat each other. But a huge part of that is

how we deliver and meet the expectations that we have from

our customers, from our stakeholders from our shareholders.

That is exactly what we're going to do. And we're going to do

it at a high level. But we're going to do it with respect and

integrity and honesty towards each other. And when we need

to have a tough conversation, we're absolutely going to do that.

We're never going to shy away from those. We're going to dive

into those deeply Brad, and we're going to have meaningful talks.

But the way we're going to do it is we're gonna engage and do it

with integrity and honesty, and respect and kindness. And as

soon as we see that conversation going in a different way. I

would like to say, you know, I'm willing to call timeout here.

I see how this conversation is going. I don't think it's going to

end well for either of us. I want to give you a chance to

reframe your thoughts, maybe dial it down a bit. If we

need to break we can break and reschedule and come

back. But if you can't do that, and you want to keep

going at this force and pace, I'll be in a position To reply,

and come at it with the same, but that's not what I prefer.

Sure, I'd like the best outcome here. And so I think really

with that honesty, it was it was being respectful because

you gotta remember Brad, that, you know, in our workplace,

people come into the workplace with their own expectations

of what they think of the boss, or management or the

president of the company. And for me playing those

roles, I understood that I could be working against 30

years of conditioning that in the home that they grew

up in, their parents hated management, they hated the

boss, they hated the leader, and maybe for very, very

good reasons. And so they come in with that preconceived

judgment that I have to be a bad guy because I own the

company or because I'm president of the company. And

that's what I wouldn't accept. And so I would spend a little

extra time to try to get them to understand, hey, Johnny's

a real dude. I'm a dad, I'm a husband, I've got my challenges

outside of work as well. And I care

and have some respect that they have that same thing going

on in their life, there's many facets of life. And I'm a big fan of

Jim Collins, he's the Good to Great guy. Right. And his book,

How the Mighty have Fallen has to do with differences in

management of hubris over humility. You have a big vision,

and hubris is how to manage the style of kind of stepping

on people. And you know, it's all arrogance and so on.

Right, humility is about serving one another. And we're

all in this together teamwork. And so I'm sensing that

this is what you're building here a sense of not that

the business moves on the trust level of all factors here.

And that's awesome. That's awesome.

That's right.

Yeah, let me let's talk about your book here a little bit

in depth in terms of what it means for people moving

forward in terms of who you wrote this book for, what

it's about who you're serving here, because I believe

what's on your heart. Here Johnny is, you know, you've

shared your story and sure to how it's been of impacting

your marriage and your life and your children, your family,

and then even your business a little bit. But I think your hearts

a little bit, even wider than that. And you have his heart to

serve others, even outside the, your circles. So you wrote this

book, who would you read this book for? What's it all about?

What part of this is serving others in love.

So to two purposes, to write the book, one, it's dedicated to

all those who find life to be hard, and to those who provide

strength and wisdom for them on the journey. So when

writing the book, I was acknowledging that although our

story is about the death of our children, and the struggle for

us to have a family, that's just the backdrop and the storyline

applied to the psychological principles of dealing when life

is hard. And so for us, I wanted to put that out there to the

people that are experiencing life when it's hard, and also

for the people out there that provide strength and wisdom

for the journey. So for those caregivers, those good friends,

those parents, anyone that seen when life is hard for someone,

really, I very clear about how good that people were to us. So it's

for both sides of that coin. Number one. And then I also wrote the

book to honor my wife, what she endured physically, she endured

what I endured emotionally, but she had the whole other component

physically. And I wanted our children to know, I wanted to honor

Nicholas, Mary, and Peter, but I wanted there all six of them to know

that the incredible depths that Susan went through, in order to

become a mother and to give us a family. And so I wanted people

to understand this resilience and strength that my wife had that

was unimaginable to many in the process. And yes, my wife did

have, you know, two children that we're raising today, biologically,

but and they were born prematurely in the same stage that your

daughter was, and she spent, you know, five and a half months in

bed, during the pregnancies and just, you know, struggling, it

was bad and her life was at risk, but her resilience. So that's

really why I wrote the book is to help people with that frame

of thought and how to try to find resilience and gratitude in

the process, and then also to let people know, and have an

expectation that in their life, it's okay when it's hard. There's

so much goodness in that grit and those hard times that you

can come out of, and never to let those life lessons be wasted

in self medicating through alcohol or drugs or food or any

other form of addiction that give a temporary feel good

measure, but really find the things that are long lasting.

Faith, the trust in God, the resilience to keep fighting and

keep pushing. And again ours, it was, you know, a course of

seven years that we went through some really, really dark

times, and dark times, after all three of our kids suffered

today from illnesses that they'll have the rest of their life,

we've had a lot of medical challenges with our three kids.

And so life continued to be harsher. It wasn't just over

just because we had kids.

And that doesn't end. That never ends, you know, but I

think I love what you've done here, as you put on the

record your story, you know, you put it there in a book,

and it's in your story. And therefore, it's not only honoring

Susan, but it's also telling your children and other people's

lives and wives and husbands and children and other people

that this is my story, but you got your story too. Everybody's

got their story, that's part of the story here, has also learned

about the power of the wilderness experience is why I've just

kind of put it here that biblically, you know, you kind of got

your Exodus. So you're at your Genesis, the beginning of

things. Exodus, you lead, you eventually get to the promised

land is one metaphor, biblically. And I like to think about

that one in terms of the teaching that I do, Johnny, in

terms of, you really can't get to the promise life or the

promised land without going through a wilderness

experience. And you really devalue the wilderness

experience. And because we went right to, you know,

if we went right to some ecstatic experience out of the

beginning, then it's just gonna be ridiculous, you know,

ridiculous. So I appreciate that. So let's talk for a minute

and kind of wind this around to where I think, you know,

your story began with how people came and served

you in the midst of your pain, and how you chose to

react to that and in a mostly positive way, and not be

bitter but to get better. Let's talk about some people

may have read your book, or maybe you've encountered

or maybe you've talked to perhaps employees or

coworkers or others who have who have come to you,

not only for what's going on in your business, but hey,

you know, we've had this situation happen. How has

something that you've shared or at your book or your

teaching out of your life? How have you seen that to be

helpful to someone else to see some life transformation,

take place, a testimonial, perhaps, or something that's

going on here?

You know, for me, Brad, I think that as I've been open with

my employees over the years, and again, 1000s of them,

that I, you know, let them know that, you know, although in

this company, I have this authority and this responsibility,

I'm no different than them, in many, many ways, many of

them are much stronger than me, much brighter than me

have endured much more than me. And that were just real

people working together, I loved the opportunity to connect

with people at any level in the company, and use it as an

opportunity to show them number one, that I care that

I'm appreciative of their efforts and their commitment to

our company and to our customers. But beyond that, that

we as a company care about them and their families. And

I wanted to talk about their kids and I wanted to, for them

to know about mine, and that we had a relationship that

was built on more than just business. And because I did

that, and I put that energy into it, I found them in turn

putting that energy back into their role as an executive

or leader in the company. And we formed something

special, which was really a partnership. I'd love to say

that all those executives, I worked, they worked with me.

My team, I didn't refer to them as working for me, it was

always working with me. And we were together, we

were a tight group. And when I told them that I was

retiring after our IPO, I literally cried in front of them.

It felt like the most selfish thing that I have. I know it's

the most selfish thing that I've ever done in my life. I was

50 years old. When we had our IPO. It happened on my

50th birthday. And you know, nine months later, I was

retired. And I felt incredibly selfish and cried when I

told them that I was leaving.

Wow. So Johnny, at this point, you've made a commitment

now and you've retired from your career and then put your

valve now with all these other aspects to your website is

encourage33.com And you've written this book and you're

looking to serve others. So tell us how people have really

people want to reach out to you or find out more about

what you're about. Now I know you've got several

aspects of your life. You go to your website, there's a

whole lot of information there about healthy living and

leadership and adoption and so on. But what are people

going to find when they go to your website? What are

people going to find when they read your book? What

kind of things can you offer people who are in their own

way, you know, they're suffering, they're stuck. They

have had their own disaster happened. But what can

people find that you might be able to help people out with?

I think they're gonna be able to find hope. Brad, I think

it's as simple as that, that there's hope. And that with

perseverance and staying true to something and staying

focused and not walking away from it. It would have

been easy, the easiest thing we could have done is

stop trying to have a family maybe even easier

than that was to separate from each other. And

those were not options. And so we made a very

clear and decisive and distinct decision and

direction, that and path that we were going to

follow, and we kept going. We were desperate. And that's

why, you know, we were put in a foreign country in a very,

very dangerous situation that I write about, about in our

adoption process. And I'm not saying that being

desperate is good. Being desperate, you know, makes

you vulnerable. And we were incredibly vulnerable and

put in some bad spots because of that desperation,

but we didn't lose hope. And we were not going to lose

hope at every turn, and every door that was slammed in

our face. And so, you know, I think that's one thing that I

hope that people get out of it that they see that there is

a way out from whatever their challenges, and there are

blessings in their path right in front of them. They just

need to recognize them and not fall down the path of

Yeah, but this still happened. Of course it did. And I'll never

deny the pain that we felt the sadness, the tears, the time in

counseling. I'm not saying that we glided over things, we dug

deep into them and express those feelings. Fully immersed

ourselves in them, and then said, now we need to move out

of them because we can't stay here. It was survival that

we couldn't stay in that place. It was too dark.

Yeah. Well, I think you get some awesome things here.

And I love when you say that hope was what your book is

all about. And when you just say it'll be okay. That's not a

trite saying is. It's not just a throwaway line. That'll be okay.

It is believing that somehow in the end, it'll be okay. And

even for men and women of faith, okay. Even means if

things co complete for the South. I mean, you've talked

about over on your three children. disaster for many people.

It was a disaster, obviously. But I mean, you had a sense that

okay, we can deal with this in the sense of being okay. And that's

an awesome message to have. We appreciate you sharing from

your heart here today. Johnny. Johnny Sirpilla. Very vulnerable

with our audience. That's appreciated very much. And again,

I want to say you know, just a big heartfelt thank you and sorry

for your loss. But thank you for your message. That for your book,

Life is hard, but there's hope it'll be okay. So the title of his book is

indeed Life is Hard but I'll Be OK and the subheading is The Power

of Hope Emerging through Pain and Learning to Live with Gratitude.

His blog and his website is encouraged33.com His name is Johnny

Sirpilla. Johnny, thank you for being our guest today on the

Beyond Adversity podcast.