Some women find that having their cervix stimulated is very satisfying. Learn why this is so, and how some women suggest you stimulate their cervix.
Here is a slideshow about the cervix: www.RealDudeRadio/cervix
Hi. I’m Dr. Paul for the Real Dude Radio podcast.
Do you remember when you were twelve or thirteen years old and your mom and dad sat you down and told you about how there are women who masturbate by stimulating their cervix, as opposed to their clitoris, and how the head of your penis probably won’t stimulate a woman’s cervix unless you are in a rear entry type of position or a female partner is sitting on top of you?
In case you’re one of the few guys whose mom and dad didn’t tell him about the role the cervix can play in a woman’s sexual pleasure, I spent the past couple of weeks pouring over as many studies as I could get my hands on as well as pestering some incredibly helpful researchers so I’ll do my best to bring you up to speed about this amazing and often times misunderstood part of a woman’s sexual and reproductive anatomy.
And I hope you’ll forgive me for being a little technical here and there, but you’ll need me to do that so I can explain why one guy said that it’s crazy how much his girlfriend’s cervix moves and changes position throughout the month. He never knows how high or low it’s going to be until he reaches inside her vagina with his fingers.
Another guy said that as a man, he never knew about the cervix until he had one partner who said that doggie style intercourse hurt but she was totally good with missionary position, while another partner loved doggie style and would beg him to go as deep as he could. He’s puzzled because it’s not like he got a new penis when he got his new girlfriend.
By the end of today’s podcast, you’re going to understand at least some of the reasons why intercourse and cervical stimulation can feel different for different women, and we’ll also discuss helpful ways for you to discuss this with a partner.
But first, I should also tell you that this podcast is for information and orgasm-enhancing purposes only. If you have any questions or concerns about the cervix that are of a medical nature, be sure to ask a healthcare provider.
The cervix is another name for the lower third of a woman’s uterus; it’s the part of the uterus that sticks out into the rear of a woman’s vagina. Just about anyone who writes or talks about the uterus always says it looks like an upside down pear, so much so that I always assumed the word “uterus” meant “pear” in Latin.
But the pear analogy falls short in a couple of ways, because unlike the bottom third of an upside down pear, a woman’s cervix is shaped like a small barrel that’s a little more than an inch or 2.5 to 3 c m wide and somewhat taller than that. Also, her uterus almost always lays pretty much on top of a woman’s bladder and points towards her abdomen.
An exception is a woman who has a uterus that’s tipped or tilted and we’ll discuss more about that later in this podcast.
Also, the cervix has an important tube or canal that runs through the center of it. This tube allows a woman’s menstrual flow to go from her uterus to her vagina. And it allows sperm to go from her vagina into her uterus. It’s also what a baby comes through when a woman gives birth.
This tube or canal isn’t much wider than your urethra, which is the tube that carries pee and semen through your penis. Can you imagine if an 8 or 9 lb baby slid down through your urethra and popped out through the head of your penis? That’s what happens to a woman’s cervix, which helps explain why it is such an amazing creation of nature.
For the past seventy years, it was assumed that the purpose of the cervix was mostly for reproduction and it didn’t have a role in sexual pleasure.
One reasons for that misunderstanding is because Dr. Kinsey in his famous report about women’s sexuality got it wrong and declared that the cervix does not contribute to a woman’s sexual pleasure. The medical world has accepted this falsehood as fact and has pretty much run with it.
Unfortunately, not many people in medicine or sex education have bothered to listen to women who have said they can have orgasms from stimulation of their cervix. These women have described cervical stimulation as being “blissful,” “expansive” and “deeply satisfying.”
They’ve also said that “Cervical stimulation is like a prolonged pleasure that spreads across their entire abdomen,” or “it’s an uncontrollable rush of pleasure” and that “it lasts longer than a clitoral orgasm,” and “It’s a full-body experience and you can’t mistake it for anything else! ”
Finally, some researchers did listen to women who were paralyzed due to a serious spinal cord injury who have said they are able to have orgasms when they or a partner stimulate their cervix. The researchers wanted to know how this could possibly be because when a woman’s spinal cord is severed, she’s not able to feel it when someone stimulates her clitoris or vagina.
So the researchers convinced some of these paralyzed women to let them do MRIs on the women’s brains while a partner was stimulating their cervix. This would allow them to see if their cervical orgasms were for real.
You might think, why weren’t the more interested in MRIs in the women’s pelvic area where the cervix is located?
The best way for me to explain that is with a hammer and a nail. When you’re hammering a nail and you miss and you clobber your finger, you might think you feel the pain in your finger, but you actually feel it in your brain. It’s not until your brain processes the incoming messages from your finger and decides “damn, that hurts!” that it then sends messages back to your finger and it makes you think you feel the pain in your finger, so you hopefully pull your hand out of the way.
It’s the same with pleasure as it is with pain. The physical stimulation may occur in or on your partner’s genitals or on her skin, but that’s just the source of the signal. The actual orgasm occurs in her brain. It’s her brain that processes the signals from the nerves in her genitals, and it puts it into a kind of algorithm that includes what her expectations might be based on her past sexual experiences
and how turned you’ve made her feel, and how safe she feels when she is with you, how her body feels next to yours, and whether the smells and sounds and even the posture she’s in are orgasm friendly—and it’s her brain that takes in all of these different inputs and decides if it’s enough to activate an orgasm. And if is enough for the brain to pull the orgasm lever, then her brain makes her genitals think that the orgasm is happening between her legs, when it’s really happening between her ears.
We’ve known for a long time that the clitoris and the vagina are wired to the brain through nerves that travel up the spinal cord, which is why women who have experienced a serious spinal cord injury and are paralyzed from the chest or waist down are not able to feel any sensation in their clitoris and vagina.
So this is why the researchers were particularly interested in women who are paralyzed due to a serious spinal cord injury—and they did MRIs on the women’s brains when a dildo was being used to stimulate their cervix. And they discovered that the parts the women’s brains where orgasms are produced started to light up.
The reason why is because instead of traveling to the brain through nerves that run through the spinal cord like the clitoris and vagina, the sensations from the cervix travel to the brain through the vagus nerve, which does not go through the spinal cord.
The vagus nerve is part of an amazing network of nerves that go up through the abdomen, then through the throat, and then into the brain. The vagus nerve is part of the parasympathetic nervous system that lets the brain know what’s going on in the stomach, intestines, heart, lungs, liver, whatever… And it has branches all over the pelvis and abdomen.
So it doesn’t matter if a woman has had a serious spinal cord injury or her spine is just fine and her spinal cord is fully intact and is working well. And the cervix uses three sets of nerves to communicate with the brain. Two of those are the same nerves that the clitoris and vagina use.
And considering its location at the back of a woman’s vagina, it’s almost impossible to stimulate a woman’s cervix without also stimulating her clitoris and vagina. So cervical stimulation is going to result in a layering of signals and sensations going to a woman’s brain which include the clitoris and vagina.
As for why the cervix moves throughout a woman’s monthly cycle, the cervix and uterus are attached to a woman’s pelvis by ligaments, which allows the uterus to pretty much float inside of a woman’s pelvis, and to change position. When I say float, it’s not like they are going to jiggle up and down when a woman is doing aerobics, although the uterus and cervix do seem to do a happy dance when a woman has an orgasm.
So why would a woman’s cervix change position over the course of each monthly cycle? The uterus and cervix respond to estrogen and progesterone, and possibly to nitric oxide and various steroids. Since estrogen and progesterone go up and down over the course of each monthly cycle, this not only causes the cervix to change position, but it also changes how the cervix feels if you are able to touch it.
For instance, when a woman is ovulating which is the time when she’s most likely to get pregnant, and usually happens near the middle of her monthly cycle, she’s producing a lot of estrogen and this causes her cervix to rise higher up in the back of her vagina and it makes her cervix feel softer, more like if you are touching your lips.
But if it’s closer to her period or when she’s having her period, her cervix will be lower and it will feel more firm, more like if you are pushing your finger against the end of your nose although the cervix isn’t pointy like the end of your nose and you can’t stick your finger up it like you do your nose.
Also, regardless of where she is in her monthly cycle, when a woman is highly aroused, her vagina becomes longer and the back of it will often tent open. This is called vaginal tenting and it might cause her uterus to pull up more to get the cervix out of the way of an incoming penis.
Also, some women’s cervix is more to the left, and other women’s cervix is more to the right. This has nothing to do with a woman’s politics. It’s simply because symmetry of the cervix in the back of a woman’s vagina is not a priority as far as nature is concerned.
I don’t mean to beat this cervix position thing to death, but before we talk about ways to stimulate the cervix, let’s imagine you’ve been abducted by some really creepy aliens who take pics of your dick every day for an entire month.
And then the aliens print out your dick pics with the date on each one, but it’s in alien language that you can’t read. And they shuffle the pics and lay them out all on a table. And they tell you that unless you can arrange the images in the right order from Day 1 to Day 30, you’re going to spend the rest of your life on the planet Ceti Alpha V which makes the Greyhound bus depot in Bakersfield seem like paradise.
And here’s the problem, you wouldn’t stand a chance sorting out your dick pics into the correct order, because your penis looks the same on day 5 as it does on day 15 or day 25. And the same is true for your prostate gland—it doesn’t change position whether your testosterone levels are low or high.
But let’s say the same creepy aliens decided to give you a second chance, and they take a 3D ultrasound of a human female’s pelvis including her vagina, cervix, and uterus every day for a month, and they print them out and shuffle them and put them on a table in front of you. The first thing you’ll notice is that the pictures don’t necessarily look the same. That’s because it’s not unusual for the cervix to be in a different position on day 5 than on day 15 or day 25.
And thank s to listening to this podcast, you might actually have a chance of sorting them in the right order because you now understand that the position of the cervix starts to go up right after a woman has her period, then peaks about mid cycle, and then drops back down until she has her period.
Of course, this isn’t going to be the case for a woman who has gone through menopause because her estrogen levels stop changing, or when a woman is taking certain types of birth control pills that decrease the changes in estrogen and progesterone.
But here is the important creepy alien take away: If you are lucky enough to be having intercourse with an actual human female, it’s pretty much going to feel the same kind of wonderful to you and to your penis no matter what day of your partner’s monthly cycle it is.
And that’ s why a lot of men assume it must be the same for women. What they don’t realize is that things change inside a woman’s vagina way more than just when she’s having her period. And so there might be days when missionary position feels the best for her, and other days when she’s all about rear entry, and other days when intercourse doesn’t feel good at all and she might want you to go down on her or she rather that the two of you masturbate.
And there’s not going to be any way that you’ll know what feels good to her unless you and she start talking about this—which is something that people don’t tell guys that they need to do. It’s not like you ever see couples in porn discussing what feels good. In porn, it’s all about a penis going where a penis wants to go. But when you’re having sex with a woman in real life, conversations matter.
That’s one of the reasons why I structure these podcasts like I do—to give you the kind of information that will help you not only initiate conversations with a partner, but so you’ll be able to ask her more intelligent questions. And for you and she will experiment, and for her to give you lots of feedback, so you’ll be able to find positions that are best for both of you.
So let’s talk about intercourse positions and the cervix.
A few years ago, researchers did ultrasounds of a couple’s pelvises when the couple were having intercourse—once in the missionary position, with the woman laying on her back with her legs straight and the guy on top, and once with the couple having rear entry or doggie style intercourse.
When the couple was in a traditional missionary position, and the woman’s legs were straight, The ultrasounds showed that her uterus was pushed up and backward. So the head of the dude’s penis slid above her cervix and totally missed her cervix by more than an inch. So in the missionary position, it was impossible for his penis to make contact with her cervix, and this guy was hung.
But when the couple was in a rear entry position, the ultrasound showed that the bottom wall of the woman’s vagina didn’t stretch as far as it does when she’s in missionary position, and her bladder and uterus got pushed forward instead of backward, so the head of his penis did rub against her cervix.
Based on what these researchers were seeing, they suggested there might be two types of vaginal orgasms a woman could have during intercourse. One being when she’s in the missionary position where the head of the man’s penis is more likely to rub against the roof of her vagina and into the G-spot area, and another type of orgasm where she’s in a rear-entry type of position and the head of his penis is more likely to rub against her cervix and against the floor of her vagina.
Another position that allows your penis to put pressure on a partner’s cervix is when she’s sitting on top of you, as opposed to when she’s laying on top of you face to face. What’s really good about her sitting on top of you is it lets her totally control what’s going on inside of her vagina. By moving her hips, she can get the head of your penis to circle around her cervix where it gives her the most pleasure.
And maybe this will help you to understand why the best sex aid for a lot of women isn’t an expensive sex toy, but a pillow that she can place under her rear end or under yours to help her to get her cervix and vagina in just the right alignment so she receives the most pleasure.
Given that the cervix is wired to feel pressure, another way to simulate it besides intercourse is with a well-lubricated dildo that’s long enough for you or she to be able to hold the part that’s sticking out of her vagina. So we’re probably talking about one that’s got a handle and is maybe 12 to 18 inches long and could have a curve to it.
Assuming your partner is highly aroused and she wants you to do this, you might hold the handle part of the dildo that’s outside of her body and gently try to make the head of it that’s inside her vagina do a circle around her cervix. You’ll want to get lots of feedback from your partner, and stop the second she says it’s not feeling good.
Women who write about cervical orgasms often say that their cervix responds best to a slow, gentle, circular motion, or a gentle back and forth massage, rather than anything that involves hard or fast thrusting. And they suggest working up to different kinds of stimulation over time, and being careful not to bruise the cervix. In other words, slow and steady with lots of input and stop if the woman feels any pain or discomfort.
Some women who are able to have orgasms from cervical stimulation say that it took a while for them to get used to the more subtle sensations after years of having orgasms from stimulating their clitoris or from getting pounded really hard during intercourse. One woman said that cervical stimulation felt boring at the start compared to rubbing one out on her clitoris which she’d done for years. Now she enjoys doing both.
Again, this is going to be different for different women, and it can be different for the same woman depending on the time of the month. So don’t assume that cervix stimulation is something a woman will even like, and remember how important foreplay is in allowing a woman’s vagina to stretch out and to increase her chances of having intercourse with you that feels good.
When I talk about foreplay when I’m speaking at colleges, a lot of women will say they like twenty to forty minutes of foreplay as opposed to the twenty-seconds that women usually get in porn.
One other thing about intercourse is that some women say it can occasionally feel like a gut punch when the head of a penis runs into some part of their vagina. I suspect that would be their cervix. And I’ve heard this doesn’t necessarily happen when a guy has a really long or mostly huge penis.
In fact, it might happen when a guy’s penis is average size and a woman’s cervix is at a low point or in the line of fire where his penis collides with her cervix head on instead of stroking it or massaging it.
Okay, no conversation about the cervix would be complete if we didn’t talk about what it looks like, and then what cervical mucus is and why it matters.
Given that the cervix sticks out into the rear of a woman’s vagina, it’s unlikely you’ll be able to see it unless you use a device called a speculum to look inside a woman’s vagina. I’ve created a post that includes a slideshow of women’s cervixes. It’s at RealDudeRadio.com. Just enter the word “cervix” or “uterus” in the search box. And keep in mind that in order to see the cervix you need to look through a woman’s vagina so the slideshow is highly explicit.
I’ve also got a link to a wonderful website called BeautrifulCervix.com where women post images of their cervix during different times of the month.
But if you want to see a cervix in real life and you have a curious partner or a willing female friend, you can get an inexpensive plastic speculum from Amazon, along with plenty of lube to let it slide in more easily.
This is the type of tool that gynecologists use to separate the walls of the vagina so they can look at the cervix. And to take a pap smear which is when they scrape some of the cells from the surface of the cervix to determine if they might be cancerous or precancerous.
The part of the cervix that you can see at the back of woman’s vagina looks a bit like the cap of a medium-sized mushroom if it were pink or somewhat like the head of a penis if the slit in the middle was turned sideways. A woman will need to use a mirror or her phone to see her cervix when you’re holding the speculum in place.
The slit in the middle of the cervix is called the Os, or OS, rather than the place where Dorothy went to see the wizard. It’s about 8 mm wide or almost a third of an inch at the max. The cervix plays a major role during the entire pregnancy in keeping the baby from falling out of a woman’s uterus or womb until it’s time for labor to begin, and then that tiny little slit opens up to be 10 or more centimeters wide to allow a baby through.
But this only happens when a woman is pregnant and is going into labor. So there’s no way your penis will accidentally go up into a woman’s cervix when you are having intercourse, nor will a dildo or a tampon.
And last but not least, there are cervical secretions that can play a big role in both lovemaking and in a woman becoming pregnant.
As I mentioned earlier, the tube or canal that runs through the middle of the cervix allows period flow from a woman’s uterus to drip through it and into her vagina, and it’s also the port of entry for sperm to go up through her uterus and to fertilize an egg. This tube is lined with specialized cells that produce three different types of fluid that make up what we call “cervical mucus.”
Immediately after a woman has her period, there’s not much fluid or mucus that comes out of her cervix. But as she’s getting closer to the middle of her cycle, her cervix starts to produce between 20 to 60 mg of cervical mucus per day. And the mucus starts to become kind of yellowish white, or cloudy, and it’s stretchy and it feels a bit like glue.
And then, as she’s getting closer to ovulation, which usually happens about the middle or her cycle and it’s when a woman is more likely to become pregnant, her cervix seriously ramps up production of cervical mucus to more than 600 mg a day, or up to twenty times more than during other times during the month.
It’s enough fluid or mucus to cause a woman’s underwear to feel wet, and it’s why the Germans use the word “wasserfall” which means waterfall to refer to this increase in fluid that occurs around the time of ovulation.
And during this time, the cervical mucus becomes watery and it looks like egg whites or precum, and it’s job is to help sperm move more easily up into the uterus and it helps prevent the sperm from getting fried by the more acidic environment inside the vagina.
Couples who are trying to become pregnant know to look for this change in the cervical mucus as a signal that it’s time to have sex. And couples who are using a form of birth control that’s called Natural Family Planning know that when cervical mucus starts to look like egg whites or precum, it’s time to pull out the condoms or for the dude to get a handjob or a blowjob.
And finally, a week or so after ovulation, the cervical mucus may have thickened to make a plug that keeps bacteria and unwelcome objects from getting into a woman’s uterus, which is a really important role that it plays throughout much of a woman’s pregnancy.
Earlier, I mentioned that some women have a uterus that’s tipped or tilted. This is when the uterus points up or backward instead of toward a woman’s abdomen, and it is perfectly normal. Women who have a uterus that’s tipped or tilted will often find rear entry intercourse positions to be uncomfortable and sometimes painful.
I did a video on it that YouTube actually banned, and if you look at that video, maybe you’ll be as blown away as I am that YouTube would actually take that video down. But I do have it on the website at RealDudeRadio.com.
There’s a lot of things I did not mention about the cervix today, like how having uterine fibroids or endometriosis can cause sex and cervical stimulation to be painful for a woman. And I didn’t talk about the roll that the cervix plays in delaying sperm that’s on its way to a woman’s Fallopian tubes, and much, much more.
So even though you now know more about the cervix and it’s role in sexual pleasure than most men alive, please understand, that at best, this was but brief introduction to this amazing part of women’s sexual and reproductive anatomy that’s called the cervix.
I’m Dr. Paul for the RealDudeRadio podcast. If you have any questions or comments, use the contact form at RealDudeRadio.com.