If you must or even if you just want to go back to work, don't beat yourself up about it. If the money enables your family a higher standard of living than you would otherwise be able to have, that's a good thing for your child. If you do go back to work, don't feel as though every minute you spend with your child has to be geared towards their cognitive and socio-emotional benefits, because just engaging in normal daily activities with your child has a benefit that's often overlooked by the researchers who study this topic.
Jen Lumanlan:Hi, I'm Jen and I host the Your Parenting Mojo podcast. We all want our children to lead fulfilling lives, but it can be so hard to keep up with the latest scientific research on child development and figure out whether and how to incorporate it into our own approach to parenting. Here at Your Parenting Mojo, I do the work for you by critically examining strategies and tools related to parenting and child development that are grounded in scientific research and principles of respectful parenting. If you'd like to be notified when new episodes are released and get a free guide to seven parenting myths that we can safely leave behind, seven fewer things to worry about, subscribe to the show at yourparentingmojo.com. You can also continue the conversation about the show with other listeners in the Your Parenting Mojo Facebook group. I do hope you'll join us. Welcome to the Your Parenting Mojo podcast.
Jen Lumanlan:Today, we're covering an altruistic episode, one that I actually don't need because we already made this decision a long time ago, and that's on how to decide whether or not you should put your child into daycare or preschool. Now, I regularly get questions from listeners on this, and my response has typically been that there isn't a lot of research on the benefits and drawbacks for middle-class children on whether the child goes to daycare or not, and that's still true. So, I'm going to be really upfront here and say that the vast majority of the literature related to childcare is conducted from the perspective of looking at methods to close the enormous deficit in skills, particularly language skills, with which poor children, and particularly poor black children, enter kindergarten. And yet very, very few of these researchers ever think to question the system in which this research and the poor children themselves reside. These children only have a, quote, deficit of skills because the school system isn't set up to value and develop the skills these children do bring to this environment. So, the vast majority of this research says something along the lines of poor children are lacking X, Y, and Z skills when they enter daycare, and daycare has success at closing the X gap between the poor children and middle-class children, but not Y and Z. Now, I've done research on the listeners of this show, and while there are certainly parents of all kinds listening, I think my listeners and certainly the people who email me asking about daycare are mostly fortunate enough to be not highly economically challenged.
Many of them have been stay-at-home parents for several years and are trying to decide whether the child would benefit more from continuing to stay home or go to daycare, rather than making this decision from the perspective of our family needs and other incomes, so my child is going to have to go to daycare, although there are a few who worry about whether they're somehow being selfish for wanting to work and sending their child to daycare. So, we should acknowledge that the concerns of parents who are asking me about daycare and preschool for their children are pretty different from those of most of the researchers who look at this question, but there are some researchers who have taken a different perspective or who have looked at the data in such a way that allows us to understand more about how this decision affects our children. So, today we're going to look at what the scientific literature says on this topic. We'll look at whatever research is available in the pre-kindergarten years, so throughout this episode, when I say daycare, I mean care for infants, and when I say preschool, I mean care for toddlers, and I'll let you know the age group that the studies refer to. And I have a couple of other treats lined up for you as well. If you're in the U.S. and possibly some other Western countries as well, you might be gearing up for preschool touring season.
So, my friend Evelyn Nichols, who used to run the Rye and Reggio Emilia-inspired daycare called Mighty Bambinis, has written a blog post for us drawing on her expertise running a daycare as well as her master's in education to help us understand what questions we should really be asking on a preschool tour to get a feel for whether a preschool is going to be a good fit for your family. So, that post is going to be out next week, but if you want to get a head start or if you have tours coming up this week, head on over to yourparentingmojo.com forward slash preschool, which is the episode page for this episode, to download a really cool printable list of questions to take on a preschool tour with space for you to jot down your answers as well. So, that printable is available right now, and if you've subscribed to the show through my website, then you actually already received it in the same email that I used to let you know that the show is live. If you're not subscribed through my site, then head on over to yourparentingmojo.com forward slash preschool to download that printable and take it with you on your tours, because it's going to let you know the kinds of questions to ask and things to look out for that are going to help you judge the real quality of a care setting, which the literature shows is not as easy to judge as you might imagine. Okay, so now on to the research. I want to just lay a little bit of groundwork with research on the effects of daycare and infancy, even though that isn't our focus.
A lot of the studies looking at daycare and preschool takes advantage of policy changes related to parental leave in European countries and looks at a shift in children's abilities before and after the change. And so, just as a little methodological side note, these studies are done in a pretty different way from the usual ones we see on the show, where a researcher takes 50 children into a lab and asks 25 of them to do one kind of task and the other 25 to just play a game. And then the researchers ask both groups to do a different task and see which group can do it better.
And so, for many of these studies that we're looking at today, the researcher might call up, for example, Statistics Norway and say, could you please send me the data you have on the percentage of mothers that worked the year before and after the maternity leave increase, as well as the test scores for all five-year-old students in the country in those years, and also the final graduation rates and test scores for those children when they left school. And Statistics Norway says, certainly, madam, we'll send it to you within a couple of weeks. And the researcher can just sit in their office and run some statistical analysis on the data. So, this data can give us some incredibly powerful country-level information that would otherwise be prohibitively expensive to gather by an individual researcher. But we should also acknowledge that this data is not able to tell us much about the individual-level processes going on. A child might score poorly or well on a standardized test for a whole host of reasons not related to the amount of time they spent in day care or preschool.
So, while these studies can tell us about how children, on average, in a certain country respond to being in day care or preschool, they don't tell us much about how your child will respond to the situation. Okay, so on to the research. One study on infant care compared child outcomes after an increase in mandatory paid maternity leave from zero to four months and mandatory unpaid maternity leave from three to 12 months in Norway in nineteen seventy seven.
Jen Lumanlan:These children were 29 in two thousand six when the study happened. And the study found that 2.7% more of the children completed high school after the reform, going up to 5.2% for those mothers who have less than 10 years of education. There wasn't really any high-quality child care available in Norway for under two-year-olds at the time. So, the alternative that parents could use was grandparents or other informal care. So, this isn't really a comparison between the kinds of care that most of my listeners are considering. An American study found that children whose mothers had worked during the first year of their child's life had lower scores on a test of cognitive ability and verbal intelligence.
But this was partially offset by a positive effect when the mother works in the second and subsequent years. The negative first-year effect wasn't impacted by the increased maternal income that came with the mother's work, although this did appear to play an important role in producing the positive effect in the second and later years. But this study didn't look at the kind of care the mother was using. So, we don't know if it was center-based or informal, which is a pretty important distinction, as informal care is regularly associated with detrimental outcomes for children. And we also don't know anything about whether these differences between the two groups persisted as the children got older. Another American study aimed to control for factors that might have differed between families using daycare and families not using daycare.
So, things like the fact that women who returned to work earlier may provide a less nurturing or stimulating home environment and may be less likely to breastfeed and the type of care used. These researchers found adverse effects of maternal employment on cognitive outcomes for non-Hispanic white children, but not for African-American or Hispanic children that persisted until age 7 or 8, although the effects were not large and were worse among lower-income families. The child's home environment was an important factor predicting cognitive ability, and breastfeeding didn't seem to impact the results one way or the other, and informal care provided by non-relatives, again, producing the worst outcomes.
Jen Lumanlan:One particularly pessimistic study said that looking at young children's verbal ability isn't a very good way of assessing the impacts of maternal work because we should actually be looking further ahead. And if we do that, we see that mother's early work is linked with worse performance on reading and math tests at age 5 and 6, about the same decline in performance, actually, as if the mother had two to three years less education than she really does. This is one of the few studies that had looked at part-time employment and found a reduced but still negative effect of part-time work, but the effects of the type of daycare use were highly mixed.
It also disaggregated the results by economic status, noting that, quote, children with working parents come from relatively advantaged backgrounds or possess attributes associated with rapid cognitive development, end quote, which is a bit opaque to me, but I think what they're saying is that white middle-class parents are, quote, good parents, and when these parents spend less time with their children because they're working, the children experience adverse outcomes. Once again, however, what we're really measuring is the ability of all children to do well on the types of tests that predicts academic ability in a system that's really designed for white children to succeed in. So that's what some of the research on working while the child is very young has found. In general, it seems to be more negative when low-quality care is used and the parent is advantaged and it may be somewhat offset if the mother continues to work in subsequent years. But what happens if the mother remains at home for the child's first and maybe second year and then returns to work after that? Well, the research on this front is decidedly mixed and so we're going to spend some time teasing it out. Once again, there's a large body of work demonstrating the benefits of high-quality care for the population of welfare recipients, largely because the skills that these families develop in their children are not ones that are valued in school.
So formal daycare environments get these children used to functioning in an environment where you need to sit still and listen to the teacher, which helps the children once they get to school since sitting still and listening to the teacher is a valued skill in that environment. In other words, white middle-class parents do just fine at preparing their children to succeed in a school that espouses white middle-class values, a finding that's echoed in several other studies as well. A couple of studies looked at Norway's ninteen eighty eight care for cash reform, which provided cash to families with young children who did not use formal childcare facilities and instead took care of their infant or toddler themselves, used grandparent care or used other informal care.
This program apparently reduced the score on a reading test by about 1.24% among children of mothers with low levels of education. There's a small increase in the scores driven by increased income from the mothers going back to work, but this is offset by the use of low-quality informal childcare and encourages the mother to have more children who will also have lower scores. But on the flip side of that, another study found that older children whose mothers had an infant or toddler who made them eligible for the cash for care program actually had a better than expected 10th grade GPA, possibly because the school day in Norway is short and students get a lot of homework assignments. But after-school programs are apparently of low quality, so having the mother available to help with homework could have supported the older child's educational achievement. But this was just a tentative hypothesis as the study didn't seem to fully explore the link between maternal education or family income and the child's outcomes. It's possible that white middle-class mothers might have provided more effective homework support for children than lower-income mothers from other backgrounds.
Now I want to take a little detour here because I've mentioned the terms high quality and low quality a few times now and you're probably wondering, well what is a high-quality preschool? It seems as though that should be a relatively easy thing to define, but it turns out that it's actually not. Some researchers in the UK looked at the indicators that the UK schools inspectorate, which is called Ofsted, uses to measure quality and these are things like staff qualifications, the staff to child ratio, the group size, which is all rolled up into a score of outstanding, satisfactory or inadequate. And it turns out that attending preschool that's rated outstanding is associated with moving up less than one level on just one of the 13 scales that make up the foundation stage of primary education in the UK at age five. And children who attended inadequate preschools do not always have the lowest readiness scores. So it seems as though the type of administrative data that's usually used to measure quality is easy to collect and conveniently objective, but the actual experiences of the children in the setting, which is also called process quality, can only be measured by actually observing children in the setting, which makes this data very time-consuming and expensive to collect, which is why nobody does it on a large scale. Other studies have found positive but weak relationships between the average qualification level of staff and process quality, specifically for social skills like being cooperative, social and less worried and upset.
The same researchers found that helping some of the nursery staff to achieve a qualification leads to a significant improvement in process quality, but studies in the US have found few associations between qualifications and quality at all. So the blog post that's going to be published next week will help you to ask the questions when you go on preschool tours that will get at some of these process quality metrics. And the printable, which as I mentioned is available now, is something you can actually take with you so you remember what questions to ask and have space to jot down some short answers while you're actually on the tour. Now I should acknowledge that pretty much all of the research I found on quality is related to quality in formal daycare centres rather than related to in-home nannies or nanny shares, which are a pretty common way to care for young children among the middle class in the US when they're very young, or in informal settings like the grandmother down the street who takes in the neighbourhood children for a pretty cheap rate and probably doesn't have any formal qualifications. Daycare centres and preschools are much easier to inspect and assign numerical scores to, so that's where the research seems to focus. Okay, so back to the implications of being in preschool for children.
A study by Dr. Christina Pfelf in Germany, published in two thousand twelve, looked at changes in parenting practices after the expansion of parental leave from three months in nineteen seventy nine to 36 months of job protected leave and 24 months of that being paid leave, which probably makes our American listeners want to cry. In contrast with previous studies conducted in Quebec, which found that the introduction of a childcare study led to more hostile parenting styles and thus to a deterioration of child well-being, this one in Germany found that the quality of maternal care does not deteriorate as a result of sending the child to centre-based care. The paper notes this could be because the kinds of activities that get crowded out in the mother-child interactions are things like running errands and watching TV when the child's in daycare all day. And I did want to linger on this point for just a minute. Firstly, because I think that running errands actually has the potential to be a very rich interaction for children. My four and a half year old daughter, Karis, loves to come grocery shopping with me and we spend quite a bit of time talking about the things we're buying and now she's receiving pocket money.
I imagine the cost of items is going to become more of a discussion point as well. She helps me to unpack the bags when we get home, which Dr. Roberta Golinkoff cites as a perfect example of an activity that supports the development of skills related to cooperation and communication. It also reminded me of things I've read in the homeschooling literature discussing how parents whose children are in school tend to run errands while their children are at school. But it turns out that kind of running errands is what life is about. As a result, many children get to age 16 or 18 never having been in a bank or a post office or having any idea of how to interact with the staff in these institutions. There's a real tendency in modern parenting to get these kinds of errands out of the way so you can do the fun stuff with your children.
But when you're a stay-at-home parent, the children are around all the time, so these errands become a natural part of their lives and they just see what it means to be an adult rather than being apart from adults in school and learning or trying to learn how to be an adult there. And the other part of this that caught my attention was the observation that low quality solo time in front of the TV is something the child is less likely to spend time doing if they attend preschool, which reminded me of an article the New York Times actually just ran a couple days ago discussing the pressures of modern parenting. It talks about how the American Academy of Pediatrics is contributing to this trend by saying that if parents do allow their children to watch TV, the parents should sit with the child and discuss what they're seeing. So it seems as though there's some tension here between activities that we're pretty sure are good for children and whether we really need to do these all the time to be adequate parents. Another reason that maternal care quality can improve when the child's in daycare is if the mother uses that time to work, which I have to say I was surprised to see they don't always do in European countries, and thus a higher family income results. This was a conclusion of the German study, although earlier in the paper the authors had said the mother's wage didn't result in a significant increase in the net household monthly income, possibly due to the cost of child care and commuting.
I have to say though that I was pretty disappointed to find another paper by Dr. Felf published in two thousand fifteen which appeared to reach exactly the opposite conclusions from the two thousand twelve study, and I'm going to quote, subsidized full day care has negative effects on children's socio-emotional development. Full day separation from the primary caregiver who is most like their mother entails problems for children's social maturity and emotional stability, end quote. Rather annoyingly, the two thousand fifteen paper doesn't even reference the two thousand twelve paper, never mind attempt to explain the discrepancies between them.
The two thousand fifteen paper did note that daycare workers may be better trained at stimulating children's verbal analytical and motor skills, but the mother may be better at promoting social emotional development because of the value of the child's attachment to the parent, and you can look back to the relatively recent episode we did on attachment if you need a primer on what that is and why it's important. Surprisingly though, it was actually children from lower socioeconomic backgrounds that experienced the greatest losses, and the researchers didn't explain this counterintuitive finding. I would have thought that if mothers were critical to supporting the development of social and emotional learning, and middle-class mothers were more adept at promoting this learning, which the paper says they are, then middle-class children attending preschool should experience more of a drop-off in these skills than children from lower socioeconomic backgrounds, but the opposite result was actually found.
Unfortunately, the data in both of these studies is related to children age 0 to 3, and the researchers were not able to disaggregate it. I would expect to see a pretty profound difference in putting an infant in daycare than putting a three-year-old in preschool, but we have no way to understand the discrepancy using this data. Other researchers looking at the nineteen sevety five expansion of universal daycare in Norway have found that, quote, the benefits of providing subsidized child care to middle and upper class children are unlikely to exceed the costs, end quote, probably because the primary driver of benefits to lower class children was an increased likelihood to graduate from high school, and children from middle and upper classes are already pretty likely to graduate from high school.
The researchers seem to be arguing against the case for universal daycare for children from middle and upper classes, but while they note that exposure to children from low-income parents has little impact on the outcomes of children from high-income parents, they don't comment on the reverse case, whether some of the benefit of being in preschool for low-income children is because they gain exposure to children of high-income parents who are modeling the types of behavior seen as desirable in school. Dr. Felf has also looked at children's cognitive development and finds that reading test scores at age 15 increased by about 0.15 standard deviations, so a pretty small amount, among children who were in preschool at age three, but no evidence of an advantage on math performance was found. In addition, children who attended preschool at age three were about 2.5 percent less likely to be held back a grade in primary school, so again, there's a benefit there, but it's a pretty small one. As usual, these effects are largely driven by children from disadvantaged families and, interestingly, by girls. Another researcher, Dr. Margarita Fort, actually found the opposite effect on girls, so a disadvantage to being in daycare between the ages of zero and two among affluent families in Bologna, Italy. She hypothesized that this is driven by three factors.
Jen Lumanlan:Firstly, if the care environment has a high child-to-teacher ratio, then the child is deprived of the one-on-one interaction that's valuable to their cognitive development. Secondly, the quality of these interactions may be higher at home, and thirdly, girls may be better positioned to make good use of these interactions at an earlier age, since girls' cognitive development seems to lead that of boys by about a couple of months at young ages. Dr. Fort found this detrimental cognitive impact was actually quite large, a 1.6 percent drop in IQ scores per additional month a girl spent in daycare between the ages of zero and two, although when both girls and boys were considered together, the effect dropped to a 1.1 percent decline.
An often cited study done in Quebec that I mentioned earlier found negative impacts on the cognitive development at age five among children who attended preschool at a young age, which was also present at age four, although not at a statistically significant level. And a follow-up on that study found that the younger the child was when they entered daycare in Quebec, the greater the negative outcomes. Yet what's often not mentioned in the citations of these studies is that the government of Quebec had decided to rapidly expand childcare to all children in the province, and they did it so quickly they actually couldn't find enough qualified teachers, so they accepted daycare workers with essentially no specific training in early childhood education.
In addition, about half of the centers did not respect the maximum ratio of number of children per qualified educator, and other studies found that the average quality in Quebec's subsidized daycare network is at best satisfactory, and in many cases low or not acceptable, particularly for children in lower income families. It's thus not surprising that a negative impact on children's cognitive development was found in this study, but we should also realize that unless you live in an area where the government is rapidly expanding daycare availability, or there are other indicators that the center you're considering is low quality, then these results aren't really applicable to your situation. Other studies have looked at German data on children whose birthdays occur around December and January.
Because of a quirk in the way German preschool works, children with December birthdays are eligible to start preschool earlier, and end up receiving about 400 extra hours in daycare than children who are born in January. The researchers found that these extra hours of daycare essentially had no benefit at all, either on their cognitive skills, on what academic track the children ended up, or on non-cognitive skills related to the children's strengths and differences on what's called big five personality traits, which are important because they strongly predict later education outcomes, job outcomes, and risky behavior. Dr. Felf, who we already discussed earlier, and another colleague have also looked at the other end of what happens when a child starts attending daycare, which is how what happens at home changes.
Jen Lumanlan:They used a previously collected set of data that asked mothers to complete diary entries of the amount of time spent on a random weekday, and a random weekend day, on each of three kinds of activities. Educational activities like studying, doing homework, and reading, or being read to. Structured leisure activities like arts, crafts, music, and theater, and playing sports. And unstructured activities like watching tv, listening to music, and unspecified leisure activities like time reported, doing nothing, and wasting time. In addition, mothers were asked about their employment, and children were tested on skills of cognitive and behavioral tests. And these researchers found that working mothers spent about six fewer hours per week with their children engaged in unstructured activities. So these are the activities that require the least amount of verbal exchange and direct engagement from both mothers and children. But there was no significant effect of maternal employment on time children spent with mothers in educational and structured activities that require direct verbal exchanges and involvement. Activities which the researchers say are the types of activities that most positively correlate with child development.
The researchers say that “the reduction in unstructured time resulting from working full-time versus not working outside the home leads to an improvement in children's cognitive outcomes of 0.03 to 0.04 standard deviations. So this is really, really tiny folks. And for children younger than six years old, these effects are even larger between 0.08 and 0.09 standard deviations. These estimates amount to one quarter of the correlation between the preschoolers' cognitive outcomes and the mother's education, which is a widely acknowledged determinant of children's outcomes, end quote. I found a couple of big problems with this study though. Firstly, correlation does not necessarily imply causation. We can't know for sure that spending less time on unstructured activities is what caused the improved cognitive outcomes for these children. And secondly, I would worry that working mothers would hear the results of this research and say, well, I'd better spend every waking second making sure that I'm doing educational or structured activities with my child or their cognitive developments going down the toilet. I was interested to see these researchers did not account for time spent on a whole host of activities that could be done with children that do benefit their development.
Things like going grocery shopping, like we already mentioned, cooking dinner together, matching socks while doing laundry together, playing with Legos or blocks or dress up clothes, going for a nature walk, rough housing, having unstructured outdoor playtime. And I would argue, although I haven't yet done a full episodes of research to be able to back this up, spending time just relaxing together and enjoying each other's company without being pressured to do something. Just because some activity is associated with improved cognitive outcomes does not necessarily mean that the more you do of that thing, the better the cognitive outcomes for your child. So I would advise spending time together on more structured activities, but also not neglecting the value of time spent together on everyday tasks and even time spent doing nothing. The Dutch researchers theorized that the mother's income could provide better nutrition or access to goods or services that are beneficial to the child's cognitive development, or possibly that working mothers exchange information and experience regarding time management, childcare centers and child raising activities with their colleagues, or that the mothers in question might just enjoy both working and being a parent. So before we leave this mess of literature behind and reach some conclusions, I did want to point out one final study that used data from two international surveys of over 100,000 men and women across 29 countries, which found that daughters who were raised by working mothers were more likely to work themselves as adults.
And if they did work, were more likely to supervise others to work more hours and to earn higher incomes. These daughters also spent less time on household tasks while sons spent more time caring for family members relative to sons raised by mothers who were not employed. The researchers found that gender attitudes partly accounted for the association between maternal employment and adult daughters' employment outcomes, as well as the social learning that takes place as the daughters look back at their own mother's ability to manage employment and caregiving and realize that they can do this themselves as well.
Jen Lumanlan:So beyond the cognitive and social emotional benefits that parents are interested in for their children, work outside the home may actually help children to consider less traditionally gendered roles as acceptable in their lives as they get older. So what are we to make of all this research? Well, firstly, I would say that if you can afford to stay home for your child's first year, then the research indicates that your attachment relationship with your child will likely benefit. For mothers in Europe who get this much time off paid, this is likely a no-brainer. For Americans who are entitled to a few weeks maternity leave, if any at all, this may be disturbing to hear. Now, I'm not saying that if you put your child in daycare at six weeks of age because you have no choice but to go back to work, that your child won't be able to form an attachment relationship with you because that's simply not the case. But there are a lot of benefits associated with being in close contact with the primary caregiver in that first year that the child may miss out on by being in daycare in a setting where there are more than a couple of children assigned to each caregiver, and thus the opportunity for one-on-one interactions reduced. Once the child gets to somewhere between age one and two, the considerations shift a bit, and it really isn't totally clear whether the child will benefit from being in preschool or not. To some extent, I think it depends on the child. A highly social child with an introverted mother seems likely to benefit from an external setting.
An introverted child who struggles with transitions may need more time before they're ready to be away from the parent on a regular basis, if this is an option. Parents might be tempted to put their child into care part-time, although I've seen anecdotal parental evidence saying that children struggle with an on-off, on-off, on-schedule, or even four days off and three days on-schedule, since for the first they can never get into a real routine, and with the latter the routine gets upset just as they're getting into the swing of it. If you do want to try part-time work and part-time care, it would probably be better to do five mornings rather than two or three full days. And in terms of evaluating the quality of a daycare, you definitely can look for child-to-teacher ratios, teacher qualifications, and the like, but just be aware that these things alone cannot tell you whether a setting is high quality or not. The only real way to assess quality is to visit the setting and look for the kinds of indicators that do indicate quality, the kind that researchers know to look for but never seem to have the time or money to collect. So just as a reminder, if you go to yourparentingmojo.com forward slash preschool, you can download that checklist that Evelyn Nichols of My Team Bambinis and I put together for questions you can ask while you're on a preschool tour, as well as things to watch out for and questions to ask yourself about your experience on the tour.
It will help you to assess the quality of the setting. It seems pretty likely that the best child outcomes are associated with high quality settings, so this checklist is really on the money if you want to be as sure as you can that your child's own experience is going to be one that makes a positive contribution to their cognitive and social development. And please, above all else, if you must or even if you just want to go back to work, don't beat yourself up about it. If the money enables your family a higher standard of living than you would otherwise be able to have, that's a good thing for your child. If you do go back to work, don't feel as though every minute you spend with your child has to be geared towards their cognitive and socio-emotional benefits, because just engaging in normal daily activities with your child has a benefit that's often overlooked by the researchers who study this topic. And finally, if overcoming gender boundaries is important to you, then it's possible that working will model that behavior both for your daughters and your sons that will help with this in the future. So I hope this helps you to understand this topic just a little bit better, and also relax about it just a little bit more. Don't forget to head over to yourparentingmojo.com forward slash preschool to download that checklist, unless you're already a subscriber to the show, in which case you received it with the notification about this episode. Thanks again for listening.
Jen Lumanlan:Talk again soon. Thanks for joining us for this episode of Your Parenting Mojo. Don't forget to subscribe to the show at yourparentingmojo.com to receive new episode notifications and the free guide to seven parenting myths that we can leave behind. And join the Your Parenting Mojo Facebook group for more respectful research-based ideas to help kids thrive and make parenting easier for you. I'll see you next time on Your Parenting Mojo.