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209: How Tik Tok Saved A Mom From Disaster with Melissa Lea Hughes
Episode 20928th July 2022 • The Beyond Adversity Podcast with Dr. Brad Miller • Dr Brad Miller
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Melissa talks about the struggles and difficult circumstances that she went through during the real, adverse event that impacted all of us, the COVID crisis, and how she was able to work through all of it and eventually turned her life around through the power of social media. Dr. Miller and Melissa will also talk about many other things such as family, faith, and about being a mother.

Melissa lost her job after the pandemic started. Her family just moved into their new home from living overseas and she needed a job to get the house. Fortunately, there was one job that was available for her, and it was working in childcare. She was very grateful for that job because she was able to buy the house with her husband with its help.

However, during that time she realized that she didn’t really have a plan. And as much as she loved children, she didn’t really want to work in childcare since she’d rather be home with her own two children. 

She tried to figure out what to do with her life in a completely new direction. It was a scary spot for her to be in. She sympathized with everyone else that felt the same thing during the pandemic. She just tried to think and pray about what her next step would be and what her life is going to look like moving forward.

After some time of thinking and prayer, what she did was write down a list of what she would really want in a job. And then in January 2021, she felt that God was really pushing her to go on social media and start posting videos. 

She talked to her husband about it and they both asked God that if this is something she should give her time to, can he please make it clear to them and then five days later, Melissa uploaded a video on TikTok which eventually generated 22 million views and landed her a spot on the Kelly Clarkson show.

Melissa believes that God has a plan for everybody. That he’s got good things in store for everyone.

Episode 209 of The Beyond Adversity Podcast is a must-listen for anyone who’s feeling stuck with their current state in life and has given up on everything. Being in a tight spot like that is one of the scariest and most challenging feelings in the world. So you must never give up hope and continue to fight for a better life. It’s okay to be not okay. And if you need a guide to help you then somehow, some way, God will eventually provide you with an answer. All you have to do is ask. 

“The Beyond Adversity Podcast with Dr. Brad Miller is published weekly with the mission of helping people “Grow Through What They Go Through” as they navigate adversity and discover their promised life of peace, prosperity, and purpose. 

Website: https://melissaleahughes.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/melissa-hughes-39b43580/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@melissaleahughes

Twitter: https://twitter.com/lissy290

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/melissaleahughes

Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.co.uk/melissaleahughe/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCnCl57W3Wpw0bHXj_TQ9XUQ

Transcripts

Dr. Brad Miller::

Melissa Lea Hughes from melissaleahughes.com.

Dr. Brad Miller::

She is our guest today on Beyond Adversity.

Dr. Brad Miller::

She's going to talk about her situation in life

Dr. Brad Miller::

where she ran into a real, adverse event that impacted all of us.

Dr. Brad Miller::

It was the COVID crisis.

Dr. Brad Miller::

But she took a way to approach that crisis that put her in a kind of a difficult circumstance,

Dr. Brad Miller::

and was able to work through that and a process in a manner

Dr. Brad Miller::

that to many of you is going to speak to many of the people in our audience.

Dr. Brad Miller::

And so I'm really looking to having this exciting conversation

Dr. Brad Miller::

about many other things about family and faith, and about being a mom.

Dr. Brad Miller::

But how TikTok has been a part of that process. Melissa, welcome to Beyond Adversity.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Thank you so much. I'm super excited to be here and really honored that you asked me

Dr. Brad Miller::

it is indeed an honor, Melissa, to have you here on Beyond adversity.

Dr. Brad Miller::

You and I have had the opportunity to chat on a couple occasions as for conferences,

Dr. Brad Miller::

and in some other groups that we've been involved with,

Dr. Brad Miller::

I've been so impressed by how you have taken a circumstance

Dr. Brad Miller::

that befell in your life and turned it around using the tools

Dr. Brad Miller::

which were at hand and if you don't mind without giving away too much of the story.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Tell us a little bit about what happened to you a couple years ago

Dr. Brad Miller::

when this crazy thing called the called the crisis of COVID came around and whacked us off.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Yeah, I'd love to do that. Can we just, one sec.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Take a pause and we'll start over again. Okay, okay. I'm so sorry. Just a second.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

All right. For the next hour, Mommy's gonna be on a very important phone call.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Okay, so you can open your mouth. Okay, you can go outside and play.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Okay, I need you to be very quiet. I'm so sorry.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Hey, we're talking about mom stuff, I get that.

Dr. Brad Miller::

The only the only issue I might have is my 16 year old dog

Dr. Brad Miller::

might come up here in a minute looking for, you know, looking for a snack or something.

Dr. Brad Miller::

But she didn't make too much noise. So, okay, but so what we'll do,

Dr. Brad Miller::

and if you need to, hey, I want to give you permission to just say to Melissa, it's cool.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Either way, if we got to take a break in a minute to for you to do some mom stuff.

Dr. Brad Miller::

You do it, all right? Okay. There's no, you know, not a problem for me.

Dr. Brad Miller::

All right let's do it again. Here. You're ready to start from the top. Okay, here we go.

Dr. Brad Miller::

This is a second take on our podcast with Melissa Lea Hughes. We'll start at the Mark 321. Mark.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Dr. Brad Millerhere with you on beyond adversity.

Dr. Brad Miller::

This is the podcast where we look to be helpful to folks just like you

Dr. Brad Miller::

who are facing some sort of adverse event in your life.

Dr. Brad Miller::

It might be depression or divorce, or a disease or something else.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Today we're talking about how a person a young mom took the circumstances

Dr. Brad Miller::

that befell her and the entire world the, COVID crisis,

Dr. Brad Miller::

which flipped her personal world, her family world upside down, and how she did something about it.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Today's a story of family and faith and being a mom,

Dr. Brad Miller::

and how something like TikTok was able to help her to navigate through this adversity and achieve success.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Her name is Melissa Hughes.

Dr. Brad Miller::

And we welcome Melissa to the Beyond Adversity. Melissa, welcome.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Thank you. I'm really excited and honored to be on your podcast today.

Dr. Brad Miller::

It's a thrill. It's a thrill in so many ways.

Dr. Brad Miller::

And I've really been pleased to get to know you, Melissa,

Dr. Brad Miller::

a little bit in some of the groups that we have been a part of,

Dr. Brad Miller::

I got to hear you speak in person at a podcast conference a couple of months ago.

Dr. Brad Miller::

I was so impressed because I saw where you took the circumstances that were given to you.

Dr. Brad Miller::

And you used the tools available to you which included TikTok,

Dr. Brad Miller::

which we're gonna talk about here today, and had somehow turned your life around.

Dr. Brad Miller::

So tell us a little bit about life was like for you in let's say,

Dr. Brad Miller::

January, February of 2020, when the world came crashing down on all of us.

Dr. Brad Miller::

How did the world come crashing down on you in the COVID crisis?

Dr. Brad Miller::

And what were your circumstances in your family? Yeah,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Well, I had lost my job. And so I was at home with my kids, which I loved to be honest.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

But because we had actually just moved home from living overseas,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

I needed to have a job in order for us to get a house.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

So the only job that was available to me at the time was a job working in my kids childcare.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And so I took that job. And I was really grateful that I actually had a job

Melissa Lea Hughes::

to be able to buy the house with my husband.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

But during that time, it was really the first time that I realized I did not have a plan.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And as much as I love children, I didn't really want to be working in childcare,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

especially when I want to be home with my own two children.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

I don't want to be dropping them off at childcare looking after other people's kids.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

So I was really just trying to figure out what I was what I should do with my life,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

kind of a new direction, and I had no kind of next step.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

So it was kind of a scary spot to be in.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And obviously, a lot of people know what that felt like during the pandemic.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

But for me, I was really trying to think and pray,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

what is this next step, and what is my life going to look like moving forward.

Dr. Brad Miller::

And, of course, that happened to is really one of the few events in human history

Dr. Brad Miller::

that really literally impacted every one in the whole world.

Dr. Brad Miller::

And yet, everybody has their individual stories of what happened to them.

Dr. Brad Miller::

And here's the thing here, Melissa, that I love about,

Dr. Brad Miller::

and that I've really seen how some people kind of get stuck,

Dr. Brad Miller::

they kind of gave up or they, gave way, or they went to depression

Dr. Brad Miller::

or whatever it was, and you decided to do something about this situation.

Dr. Brad Miller::

You wanted to get a house, you had childcare issues,

Dr. Brad Miller::

you were kind of doing a job you didn't really want to do.

Dr. Brad Miller::

So let's talk some for a moment about the actions that you took.

Dr. Brad Miller::

I love to have a format or love to talk about not staying stuck, but taking action.

Dr. Brad Miller::

What are some of the actions that you took to say, Okay, I'm going to do something about this?

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Yeah, well, one of the steps I felt like I really needed to take was just

Melissa Lea Hughes::

coming into like a real place of prayer and coming to a place of honesty.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

I think sometimes we do things because they're expected of us, or we think it's what we want.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

But kind of that time was really an opportunity for me to really think about what I'm good at,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

what I want to do what I don't want to do,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

and really taking an inventory of who I am as a person,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

and then kind of laying that before God and saying

Melissa Lea Hughes::

God, what can I do with this? And what opportunities might come from that.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

So I feel like that is like a really important first step is

Melissa Lea Hughes::

when you come into a place of adversity is you have got to get honest with yourself.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Whether it's how it makes you feel, you know, this is really difficult.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

This is really hard. This is really challenging.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And how is this impacting my belief system? How is this impacting who I am?

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And then also getting clear on like, what you'd like to have happen.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

So that whole process like, you know, coming to terms of some disappointment,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

but also coming to terms with what I would want my future to look like.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

There's a scripture in the Bible that says you have not because you ask that.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And I just feel like there's so many people that are like asking for stuff,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

but they're not being specific and they don't know what they want.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

So I actually took some time, some months to pray about it.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And I ended up writing down a list of what I would want in a job.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And I had like, seven things, specific things that I that I really wanted.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And then I surrendered that and prayed over it and asked God like,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Can I have this, please. And so that was kind of like the very first step

Melissa Lea Hughes::

and living in a very surrendered place at that time.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And trusting that at the right time, God would bring about the right next step,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

which is a hard spot to be in when you're in the in between. But it's really about trust.

Dr. Brad Miller::

You're an organized person, aren't you, Melissa?

Dr. Brad Miller::

Because that part of things whether they're in order or not you'd like for them to be in order.

Dr. Brad Miller::

I think that's yeah, they're gonna do. Yeah, so. And so that's part of what went.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Part of what I'm getting out here is when the COVID crisis hit,

Dr. Brad Miller::

that was a massive disruption, a disorder of everyone's life, including your own.

Dr. Brad Miller::

And the temptation is for all of us, I believe, is to try to kind of put things back in the bottle

Dr. Brad Miller::

or try to go to what we know, you know, to what, what we know, is whatever that would be.

Dr. Brad Miller::

To find a friend, it's to find a traditional job or define something

Dr. Brad Miller::

that we kind of fit in our experience our niche.

Dr. Brad Miller::

And you've made this list here are some things that that you wanted to see in life.

Dr. Brad Miller::

And did in this list of these things in life.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Did they include some of this looking backwards to doing something what you have done,

Dr. Brad Miller::

or did some of this list also include some new innovative ideas that you're uncomfortable with?

Dr. Brad Miller::

Or perhaps both?

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Yeah, the list was as specific as I could get without boxing myself in.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

But like I put things down, like I want to have a job that I can work from home some days.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

I want to have a job that gives me flexibility and creativity

Melissa Lea Hughes::

and want to have a job like I listed things like that.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

But what ended up happening was getting a job and something I had absolutely no,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

like it came out of left field had absolutely no plans to do

Melissa Lea Hughes::

so it wasn't something that I could conceive or come up on my own. It

Dr. Brad Miller::

Is it the childcare job now is what you're talking about?

Melissa Lea Hughes::

No. So whenever you need childcare, yeah, I was.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Yeah, I was really praying about what the next step would be.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

to go on social media and start posting videos.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And I had no idea what that meant, or what that looked like.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And then in January of 2021, I felt God just really start impressing on my heart

Melissa Lea Hughes::

But it was so strong on my heart to do this, I talked to my husband about it.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And we prayed God, if this is something most of you give her time to, would you just make it clear.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And then five days later, I uploaded this video on Tiktok, because I knew it was a video platform.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And that video generated 22 million views, and I landed a spot on the Kelly Clarkson show.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Okay, well, let's just take a breath here for a second, because that's kind of that's stunning.

Dr. Brad Miller::

That's a stunning, there. And but before we get into the details of that,

Dr. Brad Miller::

and I do want to hear the details of that, I really want to hear just a little bit more,

Dr. Brad Miller::

Melissa about what your husband did in terms of the,

Dr. Brad Miller::

I'm a big believer that in the process that I teach,

Dr. Brad Miller::

that things happen for us when we connect to a higher power,

Dr. Brad Miller::

or when we have an intentional connection to a spiritual life to God to some process there.

Dr. Brad Miller::

So let's go just a little slightly deeper on that before we get into some of the details of Tiktok

Dr. Brad Miller::

and some of that type of thing and ended up on national TV.

Dr. Brad Miller::

And so one template about about that connection, that happened spiritually,

Dr. Brad Miller::

both with your own personal spiritual life and with your husband,

Dr. Brad Miller::

and how that was really a pivotal moment to make a major life change.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Is that a fair statement to say?

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Yeah, yeah, definitely. Yeah, I just, I feel like I've always tried to live my life

Melissa Lea Hughes::

where I will ask God and I'll invite God into my decisions into my life,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

I'm really have learned to listen to his voice.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Rather than my voice, which I've not done perfectly, I'll just say that.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

But being open to that voice. And I know when it's God's voice,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

because he's always got good things to say. He's way smarter than me.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And it brings the sense of like, peace, and comfort to my heart.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And so whenever I've gone into making a major decision,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

I've always done my best to try to listen for that voice and be open to that voice.

Dr. Brad Miller::

So the leading just to use kind of a Christian term,

Dr. Brad Miller::

the leading that you had led you then in to take this action of creating the Tiktok

Dr. Brad Miller::

and social media because that is the major platform,

Dr. Brad Miller::

the tool that is before us in your 2021 and 2020, 2022.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Is that a fair kind of assessment of the framework that you end

Dr. Brad Miller::

that was the opportunity before you?

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Yeah.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Okay, that's awesome.

Dr. Brad Miller::

So let's, let's dig a little further down because I'm a big believer in a process I like to call the ACTS plan

Dr. Brad Miller::

the A is for action the C is to connect with a higher power that you got to do

Dr. Brad Miller::

but you got to get into the think with discipline and to apply it, you got to make the application.

Dr. Brad Miller::

So you just made this video in just two we're talking in July of 2022.

Dr. Brad Miller::

So just a year and a half or so ago. You said it was January February of '21.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Is that when you did this I forget what it was but you just did made a video about your kids is that right?

Dr. Brad Miller::

So tell us about that first video and kind of how you perceived how this happened.

Dr. Brad Miller::

What boom happened in your life?

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Yeah, it was just a video that we'd actually caught on camera.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

I took my kids sledding and they went down my in laws.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

It was a very long like hill in their front yard

Melissa Lea Hughes::

and they ended up hitting this like jump at the bottom and the sled flipped, turned

Melissa Lea Hughes::

and it looked like they were going down the street but what was funny about the video was

Melissa Lea Hughes::

it was obviously just a surprise but you could hear my daughter yelling from the sled

Melissa Lea Hughes::

mommy trail down the down the pathway there but it was just so funny like such a mom fail type of video.

Dr. Brad Miller::

I assume she's pretty little girl at this time. Is that right?

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Yeah, okay, yeah. Wow, she's pretty cute.

Dr. Brad Miller::

I mean, age wise, she was pretty little, like two or three years old.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Yeah, she was four. And my son was three on that sled.

Dr. Brad Miller::

So there you go. And so you had this video, just fun video, like, we've seen them all the time,

Dr. Brad Miller::

or whether we're on TikTok on YouTube or whatever, kind of like the cat video,

Dr. Brad Miller::

cats and kids and a few other things always seem to get a lot of views.

Dr. Brad Miller::

But what do you think happened here that made this so popular,

Dr. Brad Miller::

and ended you up in the Kelly Clarkson show

Dr. Brad Miller::

and got you on the ball rolling to be a TikTok guru, which is definitely what you are now?

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Yeah, well, I think a big part of it was obviously just the content.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

The video was just funny, that people loved they loved the fact that

Melissa Lea Hughes::

it was a mom trying to do something good for their child, and it kind of went wrong.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

I think people thought that was funny and relatable.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

But ultimately in my mind, it's crazy to me how that whole month,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

God was really truly speaking to me about social media.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And then the very first video that I post in the like,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

kind of answering the call, as you would say, it went mega viral.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And so like, I just look at it as in. Just like, following, again,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

God's plan God's voice to our life, I believe he's got a plan for everybody.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

I believe he's got good things in store for everyone.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

No person is on the planet just to exist.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

He has an intention and a purpose for every single person's life.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And for whatever reason, he thought I should be on TikTok.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And so I just think like what people see is like this mom, and I like give mom tips and hacks.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

But for me, there's such a bigger intention there of just like spreading kindness,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

running, the goodness of Gods spreading, just trying to add value to people

Melissa Lea Hughes::

through things that I've learned.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And so I think what I've tried to do throughout my time on the platform

Melissa Lea Hughes::

is make it not so much self serving,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

but trying to add value to people through tips or tricks, or hacks, and that type of thing.

Dr. Brad Miller::

So your vision, you're you're adding values, you say, here's a little bigger,

Dr. Brad Miller::

a little different than just calling attention to yourself to the cuteness of your kids,

Dr. Brad Miller::

for instance, you know, you've got a bigger vision, a bigger mission here.

Dr. Brad Miller::

So tell me a little bit about more about your bigger vision, your bigger mission,

Dr. Brad Miller::

which may or may not have been your original intention, maybe just having fun additionally,

Dr. Brad Miller::

but it seems like it has emerged and evolved. What's Godly in in your heart for your bigger vision here?

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Yeah, it's a great question. You know, like something that is just so in my heart is

Melissa Lea Hughes::

that people would know, the kindness and the goodness of God.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And when I was growing up, I didn't grow up in like a Christian home or anything like that.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

But when I was 19, I really encountered the kindness and the goodness of God, and it changed my life.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And I decided to pursue a personal relationship with Jesus, like wholeheartedly go all in.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And I've seen how when we follow after Jesus, when he fell after God,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

how he protects us how we find joy, we find peace,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

we find this like deep sense of love in our heart that we wouldn't have outside of that personal relationship.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And so just a big like message that I have on my life is helping people to know that that's available.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And so to me, going on TikTok and posting videos about motherhood and stuff like that.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

My bigger vision is just to just to spread that love to moms.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And that's one like people group right now in this season.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

But I for my like, bigger vision for it is I just see how social media

Melissa Lea Hughes::

can be an incredible tool to be used to be a force for good.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And so everybody has kind of a relationship with social media, more often than not, it's a negative one.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

To me, I just see it as such an opportunity to help people to love people to encourage people.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Well, again, it is a pervasive platform that we all are aware of whether we use it or not.

Dr. Brad Miller::

And I assume that you have not only connections through TikTok,

Dr. Brad Miller::

but YouTube and Facebook and Instagram and the other platforms that are out there.

Dr. Brad Miller::

And you've chosen this platform is kind of how you've blown up

Dr. Brad Miller::

and it's interesting how when you've got you and you got a bigger vision here

Dr. Brad Miller::

that sometimes things come into play to help the verb division to come into fruition.

Dr. Brad Miller::

In your case, it was getting on the Kelly Clarkson show

Dr. Brad Miller::

and opportunities eventually to write a book.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Tell them a little bit more about that process.

Dr. Brad Miller::

How'd that whole thing about the Kelly Clarkson show? How that could go down?

Dr. Brad Miller::

To just get a phone call from somebody? Or how did that all happen?

Dr. Brad Miller::

Because that expanded your platform tremendously.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Just one of the producers from the show reached out to me,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

they said that they loved my video, and they wanted me to appear on the show.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

So I obviously said yes. And it was a really, really cool experience.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

It was an episode all about mom fails, and how to keep calm and mom on

Melissa Lea Hughes::

and it was a fun lighthearted show that they aired my sledding video and then interviewed me about it.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And then I ended up kind of continuing to share about motherhood.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And one of my TikToks, I had a publishing company reach out to me,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

and they turned one of my TikToks into a kids book.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And that was also a really cool experience.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

It was kind of words that I tried to say to my kids on a regular basis,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

but the video I think, really resonated with a lot of people. Yeah, I got turned into a kid's book.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Tell us about that book.

Dr. Brad Miller::

I know it's available on Amazon now and expand your platform as well.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Tell us about your book.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Yeah, it's called Mommy Loves You When.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And it's a kid's book about like things that a parent should do their best to say to their kid

Melissa Lea Hughes::

that maybe there is like kind of the heart of a mom, but it's not always communicated.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

So some of the things that are said in there, like Mommy loves you on your good days,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

and Mommy loves you on your bad days.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And not only like, does mommy love you, but Mommy likes you. And like who you are,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

I love spending time with you. Like really, truly letting our kids know our genuine heart for them.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Because I think a lot of moms, that is how they feel, but they don't always communicate it.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

But they think that they do through their actions,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

and they obviously give their lives to raising their children.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

But making sure that our kids really truly know that and feel that from us,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

isn't always received or communicated.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

So I think that's probably why the book did so well. And why that TikTok video did so well.

Dr. Brad Miller::

And it's all kind of works in a synergistic way to help expand the influence and power of your message,

Dr. Brad Miller::

which is about mom's love, and to be extrapolated out to God's love

Dr. Brad Miller::

and to your showing your heart, your love for the folks who are on the other end of that TikTok

Dr. Brad Miller::

or the other end of that video or the other end of that book,

Dr. Brad Miller::

or maybe I can envision my own daughter reading to my grandchildren that book, for instance.

Dr. Brad Miller::

I can put that in my own mind's eye and I could see that being a cool experience.

Dr. Brad Miller::

You've got this great message that you're getting out.

Dr. Brad Miller::

And some of our listeners here and beyond adversity are saying,

Dr. Brad Miller::

you know, that's great, Melissa, but I'm kind of stuck in my own mess right now.

Dr. Brad Miller::

I'm kind of stuck in my own dead end job, or I've got diagnosed with cancer or something,

Dr. Brad Miller::

or I have a relative who passed away, I just had an uncle passed away just over the weekend.

Dr. Brad Miller::

So we deal with some of that own life. Or I'm involved with depression

Dr. Brad Miller::

or a bad marriage or whatever it is, in my life, or I'm in crushing debt.

Dr. Brad Miller::

What are some of the ways that that could be practical application

Dr. Brad Miller::

towards getting out of where other people were stuck that you might give to people.

Dr. Brad Miller::

I know you're a young mom but you have some wisdom about you that is really awesome.

Dr. Brad Miller::

That to share about how not only this tool of TikTok but who people are can be shared.

Dr. Brad Miller::

So sure little bit about that person who might be in there,

Dr. Brad Miller::

the other end of our listening audience here might be able to helpful to them.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

I just want to say to that person that might be listening,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

I so empathize with the struggle in that place where you have had something really tragic happen,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

and you can't make sense of it.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

You don't know why it's happening.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And you don't know necessarily what the hope is or how you might be even able to move forward.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Being in that spot can be truly one of the most scariest and challenging places to be in

Melissa Lea Hughes::

and even the anger that can come from that spot feeling like I didn't choose to be here.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

I didn't want to be here but nevertheless, here I am.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And now I'm having to work through this like mosaic,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

or like these the shattered pieces and hopefully a mosaic will emerge from this.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

I just want to say you know that God is present

Melissa Lea Hughes::

and whether you have made a decision whether you're aware of his presence,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

or you're not you're open to him or you're not.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

He is so with you and he's so loves you and the one of the most beautiful things is

Melissa Lea Hughes::

it's so important to be okay with not being okay.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Until like surrender yourself to the pain and to the heartache,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

which is really kind of a weird thing to say.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

But really like letting yourself be vulnerable in that moment.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And in that spot, I feel like you can ask for help.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Whether you reach out to a friend, whether you reach out to somebody older

Melissa Lea Hughes::

or like in my instance, in my case, really reaching out to God, and getting that help.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And also trusting that this is not the end.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And I always say this, that, if it's not good, yeah, it's not done.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And I believe that God is incredible at writing our story.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And if ever you read a good story, there's always like the rosy beginning, something tragic happens in the middle.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

But then there's the resolution, something good happens at the end how it all comes together.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And so you might be in that spot where it's the unknown, something's happened.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

But something good is coming. And there is hope.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And there's hope found in Christ, he has an amazing hope to hold on to.

Dr. Brad Miller::

And that hope comes in many forms, including taking some risk, you know,

Dr. Brad Miller::

and that's what what part of that is what we're talking about here, going out and fake on that limb a little bit.

Dr. Brad Miller::

That's where the fruit said, and to do some things that are out of your comfort zone.

Dr. Brad Miller::

I'd like you tell me, Melissa, about somebody that you have made some connection with that

Dr. Brad Miller::

through your TikTok, or through your appearances or through your books

Dr. Brad Miller::

or somehow another that you know, that you've had an impact on or that you've had some thoughts on them?

Dr. Brad Miller::

And has reflected that with you? Do you have any stories like to people that you've had some impact on?

Dr. Brad Miller::

What I'm getting at here is that you have a message that is a powerful message

Dr. Brad Miller::

about not about being a mom, but about God's love and family

Dr. Brad Miller::

and getting through persevering through COVID, and other other things like that.

Dr. Brad Miller::

And part of the process I like to talk about is how you really don't have true purpose in your life

Dr. Brad Miller::

unless you're someone serving others,

Dr. Brad Miller::

and serving others also comes with a benefit oftentimes of when we serve others,

Dr. Brad Miller::

we sometimes have that the story that comes back to us that we've been affirmed in our storytelling,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Actually, do you have a specific story? Yeah, it was one of them a mom,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

she watched one of my videos, the one about what you should say to your children,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

and she shared that with her daughter who's really little, and her daughter started crying on camera.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And the mom leader ended up sharing with me that that video brought a lot of healing to their relationship,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

and brought a lot of like healing to her heart, and really kind of changed the dynamic of their relationship.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Well, here's what I'm getting at here to today,

Dr. Brad Miller::

I'd love to hear that because I have a process that I work on called the ACTS plan,

Dr. Brad Miller::

which is taking action is the A to C to connect with a higher power,

Dr. Brad Miller::

the T to think and act with discipline your process, and the S to serve others.

Dr. Brad Miller::

And I love that to hear that with you.

Dr. Brad Miller::

But what I'm hearing you say is this process has none of that been beneficial to you,

Dr. Brad Miller::

in your family, but it also with with your serving your bigger mission,

Dr. Brad Miller::

to attain some business and financial stability there and to change the course of life for for you.

Dr. Brad Miller::

but it also helps you to accomplish your dream of working at home

Dr. Brad Miller::

And that's an awesome thing. And that's a lesson we can learn here

Dr. Brad Miller::

on the Beyond Adversity podcasts is to get through it, get through the challenging times

Dr. Brad Miller::

and to have something good to happen in your life.

Dr. Brad Miller::

So if people say give people is this a real thing that people can learn from TikTok

Dr. Brad Miller::

and other social media to change their life?

Dr. Brad Miller::

Yes, to give an encouraging word to people out there that this is a real thing, that they can do it.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Yeah. So with TikTok, it's not just for young people.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And it's not a platform that people are just dancing and being being silly.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

It really is a platform that you can connect with an audience

Melissa Lea Hughes::

and build genuine relationships with people that you might not see

Melissa Lea Hughes::

but are on the other side of that screen and are receiving from the message that you're carrying.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And it's an amazing platform to educate.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Whether it's through gardening or through something a little bit more coaching,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

like what I do with moms, but it's such an amazing platform because like with pictures or even blog posts.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

You don't necessarily hear the fluctuation in their voice,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

you don't see the way that they use us their facial expressions,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

but when it's video, you really do feel connected to that person.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

So it's just a great platform to be on to be a force for good and whatever message you have to impact the world,

Dr. Brad Miller::

It'd be a force for good. And one of the good things you have going for you, Melissa,

Dr. Brad Miller::

you have a process. You have your blueprint that you teach people to help them do just that.

Dr. Brad Miller::

It's not just flailing out there, you've got a process that you've learned

Dr. Brad Miller::

and just touch on that for a second, then we'll get into how people can get in contact with you.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Yeah, so there's a very specific way that you share on TikTok

Melissa Lea Hughes::

because it's such a fast moving platform to go on

Melissa Lea Hughes::

and do like more of a podcast type style, where you're like,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Hey, everybody, welcome to my show, like people are gonna swipe right past you.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

You really need to turn up and give the value give the hook first.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And kind of almost like explain what the value is or what the hook is moving past that.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Can you give us an example that maybe from one of your videos, or what a hook would look like?

Melissa Lea Hughes::

So I did one the other week. I said that one of the best ways you can get your kids ready

Melissa Lea Hughes::

before school without the stress is using the five B's.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And I said, You know what the five B's are, and they probably don't say made it up.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And then I said, the five B's are, make your bed, be dressed, brush your teeth, brush your hair and breakfast,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

and you have your kids do all those five B's.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And then as soon as they get that done, then they can do whatever they want to do.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

But making sure that you are clear, and that you're helping your kids anyway,

Melissa Lea Hughes::

so I explained the whole thing, but kind of giving the title of it or the hook.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

And something that meets your target audiences.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Struggle is the best way that you can grow on that platform.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Yeah, that's awesome that people can build from that.

Dr. Brad Miller::

And then maybe later if they're nice, they can behave and be nice and whatever.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Yeah, so that's awesome. So, Melissa, if so it's the platform can be there for everyone,

Dr. Brad Miller::

it can add value. It's not just dancing and fun and silly value videos.

Dr. Brad Miller::

It's can add value and have that kind of thing too.

Dr. Brad Miller::

And so people can learn from you and you have a bigger vision about your face

Dr. Brad Miller::

and your family about moms. And that's a good thing too.

Dr. Brad Miller::

For those who are interested in that type of thing and people can build a career and build a business.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Absolutely.

Dr. Brad Miller::

So if people want to learn more about you and get connected to your coaching, teaching,

Dr. Brad Miller::

or maybe get your book or find out more about you? How can folks do that?

Melissa Lea Hughes::

They can follow me on TikTok @melissaleahughes, or on Instagram, melissaleahughes.

Melissa Lea Hughes::

Or they can email me at melissa@melissaleahughes.com or visit my website at melissaleahughes.com.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Awesome, awesome. And we'll put connections to all of that at our website, drbradmiller.com.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Our guest today on the Beyond Adversity podcast, Melissa Lea Hughes,

Dr. Brad Miller::

who has a great story to tell about overcoming adversity and achieving success in life.

Dr. Brad Miller::

Thank you for being our guest today on Beyond Adversity

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