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The Power of Compassionate Self-Forgiveness - Chris Smith
Episode 8414th March 2024 • The Ultimate Coach Podcast • Meredith Bell and Ipek Williamson
00:00:00 00:41:06

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What if you could create yourself at the beginning of each day so you focus on the possibilities in front of you instead of limitations? Our guest Chris Smith chooses who he is going to be on a daily basis. In this conversation with host Meredith Bell, Chris explores the series of steps he took in order to experience this kind of freedom.

Chris describes the process he worked through in his coaching with Steve Hardison, first identifying self-judgments he’d made, then releasing each of them through compassionate self-forgiveness, and finally crafting a document filled with declarations that state who he truly is.

This same process is available to everyone, and it’s described in detail in Chapter 28, “The Document,” in The Ultimate Coach. Listening to Chris describe his journey brings the steps to life, and you’ll discover why it’s “more like farming than rocket science.” This is an episode you’ll want to listen to more than once because you’re sure to gain new insights about yourself each time.

Chris also mentions the transformative power of attending live events, like the recent The Ultimate Experience in Phoenix. He extended an invitation to attend The Ultimate Experience Birmingham, England, on May 25-26, 2024, where the opportunity to re-create yourself awaits. Check the website for more information: https://tu-be-24.com/ 

About the Guest: 

According to Chris Smith, he would rather skip the accolades, achievements, and personal back-patting found in typical bios. He’d just like to get to the truth: Chris Smith is who he chooses to be every single day. His purpose is to awaken people to what is actually possible in every area of their lives.

His story begins in Arizona, where his family was among the first to settle on that wild and beautiful land. He grew up a cowboy, surrounded by storytellers, soaking up wisdom that couldn’t be found in books. 

He pursued a few vocations and found a measure of success in each. None really spoke to him so instead he chose to speak into each of them – connecting with people to create possibility, finding meaning in leadership and language, and unlocking growth and change. And in doing so, he discovered his purpose. 

Today, Chris and his team at The PSBLTY Co., partner with entrepreneurs, brands, and teams of all sizes to discover their identity and purpose. Working together, they find clarity, build leadership and culture, align teams, and create sustainable growth that is aligned with who they are in the world.

Instagram – @chriscartersmith

“The Clarity Code,” Free, 7-part Video Course - https://www.psblty.co/

About the Host: 

Meredith is the Co-founder and President of Grow Strong Leaders. Her company publishes software tools and books that help people build strong relationships at work and at home.

Meredith is an expert in leader and team communications, the author of three books, and the host of the Grow Strong Leaders Podcast. She co-authored her latest books, Connect with Your Team: Mastering the Top 10 Communication Skills, and Peer Coaching Made Simple, with her business partner, Dr. Dennis Coates. In them, Meredith and Denny provide how-to guides for improving communication skills and serving as a peer coach to someone else. 

Meredith is also The Heart-centered Connector. One of her favorite ways of BEING in the world is to introduce people who can benefit from knowing each other. 

https://growstrongleaders.com/

https://www.linkedin.com/in/meredithmbell

https://www.facebook.com/MeredithMBell

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Transcripts

Meredith Bell:

Thank you for tuning in to The Ultimate Coach podcast, a companion to the transformative book, The Ultimate Coach, written by Amy Hardison, and Alan D. Thompson. Each conversation is designed to be a powerful wake up call, reminding us of what's possible for you and your life. So if you're on a journey to expand your state of being, this podcast is for you.

Meredith Bell:

Thank you for joining me for another special conversation on The Ultimate Coach Podcast. I'm one of your hosts, Meredith bell. And it is my pleasure to welcome Chris Smith as our guest today. Hello, Chris. I'm so glad to have you on the show with me.

Chris Smith:

Well, yeah, thank you for having me. I'm, I'm honored to be here.

Meredith Bell:

I just know this is going to be a special conversation just because of who you are. And as a brief way of introducing Chris, to our listeners today, I will tell you that Chris says that he is who he chooses to be every single day, you might say he creates himself on a daily basis. And today, we're going to explore the series of events that led him to that process. So Chris, let's start with you talking about how you first got introduced to this being movement? Yeah,

Chris Smith:

I love the question. And it's interesting. I would say I got introduced to the being movement before maybe it was called the Bing movement right before coach book before the ultimate coach Facebook group, which is amazing. To 10 years ago, I had breakfast with Clint and Blake Hardison, Steve's sons. And the reason I had breakfast with them is I had spent five years in commercial real estate in the Phoenix area. And I had had some success in that industry. You know, and I felt like I knew how to connect with people. And because of that I was able to, I was able to be successful selling. I had gotten out of that industry to start pursuing more of what I do now. But some mutual friend connected me with Blake and Clint and said, Hey, you ought to have breakfast with Chris, you know, he knows something about commercial real estate. So I'm having breakfast with Glenn like Artisan didn't know, their dad, Steve existed. And sometimes throughout the course of that breakfast, one of them, I can't remember who one of them turns the other one that says, hey, this guy kind of reminds me of dad. And the other brother said, Dad, I think, you know, I was thinking the same thing. And they looked and they go, you should meet our dad. And I said, Yeah, I'd love to like, what's his name? And what does he do? And they said, well is name is Steve. He should just meet our dad. That was their response. When I asked what you know, what does he do? That's I said, that was even more intrigued. And so it was interesting. 10 years ago, I went and met with Steve. And I sat with them. And I just remember it being a really profound experience. And at the time, just based on where I was at, I didn't move forward with coaching with him. But I always remember that experience, and we ended up becoming friends on Facebook and I, I stayed connected to him. And I always remembered like, that was a really profound experience. Fast forward several years later, and I had obviously done a lot of things and those years and studied, I got really involved in and really got fascinated with the idea of like ontological work or ontology the way you know, study of being so that the idea of being was fascinating to me. And the ultimate coach book was written, I somehow got added to or became a member of the ultimate coach Facebook group. never participated in it. Literally never once posted in it, like to comment, share it, I just, I knew it was there. I knew Steve was there. And I knew this book. And last March of 23, Meredith, I'm sitting in church, and out of nowhere, I'd have this thought, hey, I think it'd be good. If you read the ultimate coach book. No one had said anything about it directly to me. I immediately come home. I buy it on Kindle. I started reading it. And right away I'm like, man, it's Steve's life. And story reminds me of me. I could relate to so much of it. And then I reflected back on one of his son saying 10 years ago, hey, you remind me of so it just kind of was a full circle moment. And I reached out to Steve on Facebook Messenger and I just said hey, not sure if you remember me. We met 10 years ago. Just wanted to tell you to tell you, Amy, thank you for writing this book. I really been impacted by it. And then I finished the book and immediately No, I want to go and do a B with session with Steve and I went into the B with session and And in sitting with Steve, I immediately knew that I wanted to do a full agreement with him. And so I've been doing that for the last year. And in that time, really started to understand the power of the ultimate coach the book, right and started see the impact of the Facebook group. And then I had the opportunity to speak at a most recent being event in Arizona, I'll be speaking at the being event in Birmingham. And, and so yeah, it's just been a tremendous, it's been a tremendous blessing to my life and helping me see what's possible, right? Like I, you know, I'm all about possibility. And a huge part of, I would say, over the last year, what's allowed me to see even more that's possible, has been, you know, the the ultimate coach book, The Ultimate coach, Facebook group, obviously, the coaching with Steve Nash has been a tremendous blessing in my life. So it kind of came full circle, almost 10 years to the day, I was back in Steve's office.

Meredith Bell:

An amazing story, I don't think I've heard one quite like that. back that far, with so much time then in between? I am curious, and I bet some of our listeners are too, Chris, when you think about the impact on your thinking, the impact on what you are doing in the world today. Talk about some of the things shifts that you've experienced as a result of working with Steve, some of the insights from the book, any of those areas that have caused you to re I guess See the world differently, and see yourself differently?

Chris Smith:

Yeah, I mean, by far, the most beautiful gift that I have ever been given, or the most beautiful gift I've ever given myself, is the process of compassionate self forgiveness. And, and being able to be guided by Steve through the process of identifying all of the limiting judgments that I have about myself, that no one else is actually placed on me. They're my own. They're my own judgments of me. And realizing just how many of them there were, you know, because when you go through that process, there's some judgments that you're really aware of, you know, you're conscious of those, there was there's a lot more in my experience, having been through it now had it having guided others through it, there's a lot more that you don't even realize are there, they've been sitting in there, and they're so deep, right, and some of them have have been there for decades. And the freedom that came from first kind of excavating all of these judgments, realizing it's not who I am, because for the longest time, those judgments felt like no, this is really who I am. And realizing no, they're just judgments. That was an empowering realization that oh, maybe I'm not who I think I am in these areas that don't serve me and they're limiting, then being able to forgive myself of those, and then replace them with the truth of who I really am and who I want to be. So that process of compassionate self forgiveness and creating a document. And one of the things that I talk a lot about Meredith is, you know, you can either listen to yourself, or you can talk to yourself, one of those is really empowering. And one of those is a narrative you're in control of which to me the the talking to yourself consciously is a powerful, empowering narrative, and you're in control of it. But when we sit around and listen to ourselves, we're just listening to those judgments and those thoughts that have been around for a long time. So there's, there's that voice of limitation that we listen to ourselves through. And then there's that voice of possibility. And I'm a huge proponent of we, you know, I believe we ought to spend more time speaking possibility into ourselves to the voice of possibility than listening to ourselves to the voice of limitation. And what I found is that my document that I've been able to create with Steve, and it's so many others referenced in the ultimate coach book, it is the most powerful tool I have to speak possibility into myself. So my document is a way to consciously speak possibility to myself every single day to remind myself of who I am. And something that Steven I've talked about in this idea of, you know, I can't I can't talk enough about possibility. If you followed me around for a day, you'd probably be like, Wow, that guy talks a lot about possibility. Like, the word itself just comes out of my mouth all the time. Just because I believe that possibilities amount with no top there's always more that's possible. And being is the ultimate possibility. Right, this idea of who am I being and and I had something really interesting just happened recently with my within my own team, I feel so blessed to be amongst a team of leaders at the possibility company. And oftentimes people will say, Oh, you know, Chris, you have some amazing leaders that work for you. And I said, No, no, I'm just one of the leaders at the possibility company, I might have created them. I might have founded it, but I, I work with them as much as they work with me. And one of the leaders on our team recently, this week was sharing with me how he's kind of in a funk and he's kind of struggling and I just asked him, I said, How often are you reading your document or reciting it? And he said, Well, I feel kind of embarrassed to say this, but like once a week, lately. I said, Okay, I'm going to challenge you to start getting back in your document and run reminding yourself of who you are and telling yourself who you are twice a day at a minimum. Well, two days in, he leaves a message on our team messaging platform. And he said, Hey, Chris challenged me to get back into my document twice a day. And you know, nothing really miraculous has happened. But I immediately started feeling better about myself. And I said, Wait, hold on, nothing miraculous has happened. What do you mean, the ability to like, immediately feel better about yourself, if that's not miraculous, I like the ability to instantly change your state, the ability to instantly change your way of being the ability to instantly feel better. What can be more miraculous than that. And I believe that is that gift of when we have a document, or we have a way to speak possibility into ourselves, and remind ourselves of who we are, because I don't care how enlightened any of us are, or how long we've been studying being or reading about being or being being. If you stop, then that voice of limitation will creep in. So it's kind of like if we're not telling ourselves who we are, then our own limiting thoughts and judgments will tell us who we are.

Meredith Bell:

Yeah, that that's so powerful. You know, as you were describing what you were guiding that person to do, it reminded me of one of my favorite, I have different favorite passages in the book, but one of them that is almost identical to what you just described, was one of Steve's clients calling him and saying, we're texting him and saying I'm in a funk. And Steve's response was, read your document and get into action.

Chris Smith:

Yeah, remind yourself who you are, create yourself and get the action. And Steve has a Steve says this line a lot. I've now adopted it from him. And I said all the time, it's like, it's not rocket science. It's farming. And the reason I love that thought, Meredith, is I think that a lot of times we believe that this idea of being and becoming and transformation and that it's like rocket science, it's like, there's this mathematical like magical equation or formula for I could just tap into this. It's actually like, no, it's really simple. It's like farming. Whatever seed you plant, and whatever seeds you water, it will take root, and it will eventually bear fruit. So if I'm consciously, consistently planting seeds of possibility, by reciting my document, and then watering the seed by continuing to recite my document, believing it can happen looking for what can work, well, then I'll reap the fruit of possibility. And that fruit tastes really great. And if I don't consciously create myself, and I don't take action, I'm still planting seeds. And I'm still watering and nurturing those, unfortunately, I'm just watering them and nurturing them with limitation. And I'll bear the fruit of limitation. But either way, you're planting seeds. And either way you're bearing fruit. And it's like, by not being an action. That's kind of a form of action itself. It's like, by not reading my document, reminding myself of who I am, that still is going to like, have a fruit, right that that gets born from that. And it's that simple. But it's also times that, that challenging. It's like why why something so simple is easy to forget to do. You know, so I do think it requires this, you know, consistency in this focus. But a lot of times that kind of feedback is like, Oh, that's too simple, like Steve Telnet Client will read your document and get an action. It's like all can't be that simple. It's got to be harder than that. It's got to be more complicated than that. It's like, No, it really doesn't.

Meredith Bell:

Well, thinking about the creation of the document. And I love what you pointed out about the, you know, compassionate self forgiveness. I think that's amazingly powerful. But getting in touch with these various judgments. And like you were saying, going deeper and deeper. How does someone know when they've gone deep enough? Because again, another passage from the book, where a client had worked on pages and pages of judgments. And Steve finally said, that's enough. Yeah,

Chris Smith:

I remember that part. Yeah.

Meredith Bell:

So how do you know when that's enough? If you're doing this on your own, and you're following the guidance that's in that chapter in the book on the document? What kind of inner guidance can we rely on to feel like we've done enough digging?

Chris Smith:

Yeah, that is such a great question. I've wondered that myself. And as I've got to my own clients through the process, I've kind of wondered and just kind of relied on my intuition. Because I think that's probably soup. So individual for every, it's so unique to every person. And I do think though Meredith, the temptation for most of us would be to maybe not dig enough. And that's kind of been my experience with some of the clients I've gotten through it, which is kind of like, okay, I've come up with three or four judgments. I don't Like looking over here, this is a fun stuff to look at. Right. And it's, it's interesting that we think our human nature is to avoid confronting things, because it's confronting. And one of my favorite quotes is by John Spence, he says, You cannot change what you refuse to confront, you cannot change what you refuse to confront. So anything in any area of our lives, like let's say, my health, maybe I have some concerns, but it's like, I'm just not going to look at that, I'm not going to confront it. Well, the it'll, it can't change. And so if anything, I think we have a temptation, maybe to not go deep enough. And one of the things that I tell people is, you really want to go deep in looking at these judgments, not because we're gonna mire in them, not because we're gonna swim in them. And just, it's like, we're trying to excavate as many of them to the surface as we can, because we're gonna do away with forever. And I think there could be a point where it's like, Okay, I think if you I think the time to maybe realize you've gone deep enough isn't like how many judgments have I identified, it's in my starting to understand the process of how to identify my judgments. Because once someone understands how to do that, that can be a gift that will serve them for the rest of their life, because this isn't just like a one time spring cleanup, hopefully, it's like, you will continue to have new judgments that occur, you'll, you'll be able to continue to identify those, forgive yourself of them. So I think it's more about helping someone to really understand the process of identifying the judgments and how to forgive themselves of them than it is how many do I identify? And I do think in that initial time, though, when you do it for the very first time, you probably want to go deeper than the knot. And realize, like, I'm doing this to get freedom from it. Because it can feel a little bit like, do I really want to go there? And my, my encouragement would be like you really do, because there's a lot of freedom. Waiting on the other side, there's a lot of possibility because all of those judgments are what has us live in limitation. And here's another thing, that voice of limitation that just speaks to us, Meredith, I found it kind of interesting that it requires fuel to run on kind of like a fire needs oxygen, heat, and fuel to help you take one of those ways. You can't have a fire. Yeah, the voice of limitation, in my opinion, runs on the fuel of our self judgments.

Meredith Bell:

Oh, yeah, break breasts, I love that.

Chris Smith:

So the more judgments I have, that I haven't done anything, the more fuel there is for the voice of limitation to run on. As I start to eliminate judgments, the voice, some limitation, it'll still be there, but it's quieter, and quieter and quieter. And then just the like the opposite the voice of possibility runs on the fuel of our declarations in our document.

Meredith Bell:

I love that is such a clear, vivid image. And one of the things that I think about, that I've I've noticed or read about just in some of the posts on the community, is this idea of creating those declarations in the document that you really believe are true for you, a place to come from. And it seems to me that that excavation is an important piece of setting aside those judgments so that when we are saying our declarations, we aren't instantly discounting them

Chris Smith:

Totally like. So here's an interesting experience I just had with a client recently, she was really willing at first kind of resistance, then over time started to see like, there's Oh, there's some freedom that can come from like really digging deep and excavating these judgments. So she so she went from not really wanting to embrace it to really embracing it. Right. And then as we would it's kind of like that, like Steve Steve talks about and he talks about the book, right, the find and replace function on word, right, I find the judgment, release it and then replace it. That's the powerful thing, too. It's it's like, a lot. And that doesn't mean that every declaration in your document has to be born from a previous judgment. But it's really powerful to do that, right. And then you can add others that just occurred to you. And my experience marry that at that time is like what this particular client is. So one of the judgments that she had was, my children deserve a better mother. And I look at this woman, I'm like, You're the most amazing committed. And that's another interesting thing, people can often see way more in us than we see in ourselves. Right? And so she forgave herself of that judgment. So she created you know, what would be the opposite of that and a declaration write a truth which is, I am the mother My children deserve. And here's what I found. That was interesting. She felt so inauthentic though at first saying it because the cognitive dissonance was so far but she goes Chris I'm not that. So I've had this come up with a lot of people say well, what do you do when you've forgiven yourself with the judgment? or and or you're working on it right? You're doing active work to forgive yourself of that judgment. But then what if the truth that comes to you, you don't even believe it yet. I think that can kind of feel hopeless. For a lot of people. It's like, well, what if I'm not that? And what if I don't even believe I'm that? And I had this really interesting breakthrough several years ago, personally around faith and belief. Because I used to have this view, Meredith, it's like, well, either I believe in something or I don't. Either I have faith in something or I don't. So what if there's something I really want to have faith in? What if there's something I really want to believe, like, I am the mother of my children deserve? But I don't believe it. And I just kind of had this like, hopeless view of it. Well, if you don't, I guess in the areas you don't believe you just don't believe too bad for you. And then I had I read a line one time that said, well, sometimes the only thing you can do is desire to believe. And that's still belief. And is like, well, so you mean that just wanting to believe is belief, wanting to have faith is an act of faith? That gave me so much hope? Because there were so many things in my life that I didn't believe, but I wanted to, that's like, we'll start there. So I asked this woman, I said, Okay, you're having a hard time even writing down? I am the mother of my children deserve much less saying it out loud. She goes, Yeah, I can't I can't even say it out loud. I could hardly write it down. I said, Do you want to believe you could become the children your mother deserve? She was? Absolutely. She was I don't believe it. But I could want to? And I said, well, let's just start there. So that the literal declaration that we created for her the beginning was I want to believe I am the mother of my children deserve. And I said, Will you say that every day? Well, along with the rest of your declaration, she said I will. Three weeks in on one of our calls. She goes Chris, the weirdest things happening by saying every day for three weeks, I want to believe I'm kind of starting to believe it. And so to me, I would just offer that, because there are going to be some declarations. Meredith, that you believe you're like, Yes, I do believe this, especially now that I've done away with the judgment. I really believe this is who I am, I really believe this is who I could be great run with those. There's going to be others that might feel like an authentic to you. And if the if you have to start with wanting to start there, wanting to believe is still courageous, wanting to believe is still an act of belief and faith. I don't know. I just I know that sounds so simple. But it just, there's a lot of hope in that for me. And for people. I think that

Meredith Bell:

There is and that makes me think about when you are at when you're done with the judgments and you've forgiven yourself and you're looking at the truth is I am ex sometimes, what shall we say the leftover effect of having gone through the process of the judgment in the forgiveness, we aren't in a place yet where we can truly know what the truth is. Yeah, us. And so just like you gave a wonderful example there. What guidance would you give for someone that might be? I don't want to say feeling pressured, but feeling like, Well, I gotta have something to replace that. Yeah. And so what's a calm, gentle way of doing that? So that I feel that I'm really getting at the truth of what it is about myself? Yeah,

Chris Smith:

I love that. Because I actually think this is real for a lot of people, right? And I'll share something that Steve shared with me recently, maybe two or three coaching sessions ago. And it had me realize that what if, what if everything in our lives? And right now we're talking about specifically like coming up with some declarations? What if everything in our lives was less about the outcome, and more about the place we come from? And the analogy he used was zero defects in manufacturing? Like, I don't know, I don't think that's ever been accomplished in a manufacturing company in the history of the world zero defects. So some might look at that and say, yeah, why would you ever have something as a goal that you'll never achieve? Wouldn't that just be discouraging? Wouldn't that just be like a reminder of every day of what you're not? Wouldn't that create, like some limiting beliefs and judgments? And it's like, oh, no, it could. But rather than have the zero defects be the outcome. What if it's the place we're coming from? It's like, I'm committed to being that. And I may never get to zero defects. But if the place I'm coming from a zero defects, I'll likely have a lot less defects as a manufacturer, because it's the place I'm coming from. So to take some pressure off of someone who's going through this process for the first time, if if that declaration that you want to feel into or that's kind of coming to you or your you really want to believe feels like, really far away. Don't think about it from I have to be this now as an outcome. It's the place I'm coming from. Like one of my one of my declarations is I'm unconditional love. Well, am I that all the time? No, I could bring my wife and five children in right now into this podcast interview and they'll give you plenty of examples, right recently, of me not being that So it would be really easy for me to say, well, I can't say that. I can't say unconditional love. Because I haven't arrived there yet. I haven't achieved that as an outcome. But it's about, it's not about that, for me, it's about, that's the place I'm trying to come from. It's who I'm striving to be. So I think we can just take a lot of pressure off of ourselves around any of this, not have to be like, I can't say this until I am that. It's like, No, I'm gonna start saying that, because that's who I want to become. And that's the place I'm coming from. But I'm not like, super like judgmental about myself of like, the outcome around it, yet,

Meredith Bell:

No, I totally get that. One of mine relates to my husband. And it's, I'm always kind to Lee. And I repeat that a lot outside of just when I say, my declarations, and it is a place to come from it, it prevents me from ever responding with sarcasm, you know, or anything that might be cutting, because I'm coming from a place always of kindness with him. So I think that what you're saying is so true. And I think the more we repeat these specific ways of coming from to ourselves, whether it's in the morning at night, or whatever it is, throughout the day, it reminds us of who we truly are. And I think that that's it goes back to your word possibility. You know, it's, it's possible for us to be that at any given moment.

Chris Smith:

Totally. And I actually think what you said is interesting, like, your reminds us of who we truly are. And I would add to that, it reminds us of who we truly are, and who we truly have already always been. Yes. Like that was probably the biggest breakthrough that I've had in the last year around all of this is, for a minute there. I thought, when I first started coaching with Steve and getting involved in ultimate coach, Facebook group and reading the book, it was like, Oh, I'm going to become something, right, like, I'm going to become more, I'm going to become better. And I'm not saying I haven't. And I'm now realizing it's less and less about becoming. And it's more about returning to who I've already always been, yes, turning to who God has already created me to be. Because I think that sometimes in the world of personal transformation and personal development and growth and being we can get this false idea that like, Oh, if I can just forgive myself enough, then I'll matter if I can forgive myself enough, then I'll be enough. If I can forgive myself enough, then I'll be worthy. If I can forgive myself enough, then I'll belong. Or if I can just create the right declarations, and live into those, then all matter, then I'll be enough, then I'll be worthy, then I'll be along. And it's such an empowering thought to me to realize, no, you you've already always been enough, you've already always mattered. You've already always been worthy, you've already always belonged. And the idea of going back to when we were infants, and you look at a little perfect infant, it's like Oh, of course look at that, like perfect. Little human being. They're just born mattering. They're born enough. They're born worthy. They're born belonging. And we think that changes. Meaning we think that as because we have not these limiting thoughts and these judgments, it's like, oh, well, now I kind of don't matter as much I don't belong as much I'm not as worthy, right? I don't matter as much as like, no, no, that hasn't changed. So what's really interesting thought, Meredith is you and I, there's nothing you and I can do to change how much we matter. There's nothing you or I can do to change how much we belong. There's nothing you and I can do to change how much we're worthy. There's nothing you or I can do to change how much we matter. That's just true. We just are and we just do. What we do change though, is our thoughts about it. We start believing that we don't matter that we're not enough that we don't belong, right, that we that we're not worthy. And the process of compassionate self forgiveness and creating a document doesn't help you now become enough and matter and be worthy. It just helps you remember that you already always have Yes. To me. That's like, yeah, just a beautiful thought. Well,

Meredith Bell:

It is and that is so profound. And I want to share with you something that just happened yesterday, that ties in with what you're saying. I was at a book launch for a really wonderful person. And he was talking about how he decided he would step into writing this book, and, you know, step into his greatness around this. And the gal that was the host of this event said, Yes, you stepped into a greatness the rest of us already knew you had. And to me this is I mean, I got chills when she said that because it resonated. So deeply, and it got me thinking about, you're talking about possibility. And throughout the ultimate coach book, one of the takeaways for all of us is the approach Steve takes with people. He sees possibility, he sees who they really are. And all of us are capable of doing that, we can see the greatness in every person we meet. And the hardest one, as you've just been saying so beautifully is with ourselves, seeing that greatness seeing that we are already where they were okay, just as we are, we always have been. But somehow, with all the messages we get across, you know, over the course of our lives, we've, we've come to overlook that. And it sounds like you spend a lot of time you've spent a lot of time yourself uncovering that. And now you're really committed to helping other people uncover that.

Chris Smith:

Yeah, I mean, that's my hope, my hope and my commitment. And my, my mission is to speak as much possibility into as many human beings as I can, you know, while I'm on this earth, and to help as many people as I can see what's actually possible. Look, I think we confuse potential with self worth. And what I mean by that is, like, all of us have more potential. No matter no matter how far you get, like, there's more potential. And I think a lot of us confused the fact that we have this untapped potential with Well, I must not have, I must not have worth. It's like, no, no, those are you have worth because you do you have worth because you're a living, breathing soul you have worth because you're a child of God, like you can do anything to change that. And yeah, you could become more than you are now. But those can be two different things. So I think people could just acknowledge, wow, I do matter. I do have worth I am enough, I do belong. And, yeah, I want to continue to see what's possible, I want to continue to tap into greater and greater potential, I want to continue to tap into greater ways of being. And yeah, that's what Steve's been for me, like Steve's helped me see what's possible. And I don't think Steve sees who you can become, to your point, Meredith, he sees who you already are. And yeah, there's more that's possible as you step into that way of being. And look, that's that's why the ultimate coach book is so beautiful as it's because it's, it's truly not written about anyone bought the person reading it. If you you know, read it that way, with the instructions on how to read the book, which read it about you, back cover, front cover, read it about you, right every time you pick it up. And I also think that I just realized more and more that I only want to be surrounded by people who are living in possibility, who are seeking out possibility for speaking possibility in themselves and others. Like I only want to be surrounded by people who are really, you know, striving to be intentional on who they're being. Because it's really easy to get around individuals or communities where they vibrate more around at limitation, they're still amazing people. But you can easily get influenced by that. And so that's why to me, it's like, yeah, if you're listening to this, and you're not involved in the ultimate coach, Facebook group, join the group. If you haven't read the ultimate coach, book, read the book. If you haven't attended one of the big events, you'd want to get to Birmingham in May, you know, we'd like there was just one in Arizona, but it's like, it's like, I want to be around people who love me enough to help me see what's possible. And sometimes that looks like support. And sometimes that looks like they're not afraid to challenge me and call me. I said instead of saying, call me out, call me forth into, you know, and, and I just think that's so, so important. I think sometimes we don't even realize that we're putting ourselves in environments around people who aren't speaking possibility into us, or who aren't encouraging us to speak possibility into ourselves. Yes.

Meredith Bell:

And so what I would love for you to share, I think as we kind of bring this to a close is talk about what you experienced in Phoenix around the folks that were there this, what did this speaking of possibility look like? And then what kind of possibility awaits in Birmingham? And you can share what's coming up with that? Yeah.

Chris Smith:

And look at, you might think, like, Oh, of course, Chris would say that. But the thing I experienced in it, the being event in Arizona was Love, possibility and freedom. Like really, it's like, just a lot of people. It's really rare to show up to anything much less somewhere where there's hundreds of people gathered together. And not a single one of them is perfect, right? And yet, I would trust that 100% of the people in that room are striving to really love themselves more. I would say that 100% of the people in that room are really is striving to tap into greater and greater possibilities for themselves and others, I would say that 100% of the people that were in that room are striving to become more and more free, and set others free. And that's a really beautiful thing to be around and be surrounded by. And I really believe in this idea of universal consciousness that we're all one. And I don't know how I can explain it, but I believe in some way we're one. And what that means to me, Meredith is, if I speak limitation into myself and others, well, if I speak limitation to myself, I'm also speaking into you because we're one. If I speak possibility into myself, I'm also speaking in an interview because we're one, right. And so it's like, the power of hundreds of people gathering in that way. It's not about the hundreds of people that whose lives are impacted. It's, it's what I call the difference the difference makes it sound is about the difference it's made. For those couple 100 people, it's about the difference, those couple 100 People go, then that ripple gets into the millions really fast. And I can just promise you, that's what awaits you in Birmingham, is a community of people who are really striving to have more increase their capacity to love themselves and love others. There's also people there who are constantly pushing the limits of what's possible for themselves and others. And there's a lot of people who are going to be in Birmingham who are really their life's mission in whatever the way they're doing it. At the end of day, that's it's to set themselves free, and to set as many other people free. And you cannot attend an event like that, and not have love possibility and freedom rub off on you. So my promise would be that anyone who attends Birmingham is you will leave seeing a greater vision of what's possible for your life than you've probably ever seen. And you'll be more committed to being your authentic self and making the difference you feel called to make. And there's just not a lot of events like that. And trust me, I know, as someone who's spoken at hundreds and hundreds of events over the years and still speak a lot. There's great events, don't get me wrong, but they're not. They're more wrapped up around doing than being. And there's just something really magical when you have a group of people in the hundreds, who are all committed to like, who are we being in the world? And how do we influence the world with more love, possibility and freedom. And it just feels good. And

Meredith Bell:

that's great. And information about that Birmingham event is in the Facebook group, the ultimate coach Facebook group. And we can include a link in the show notes as well. Chris, is there anything else you'd like to share with us as we wrap up?

Chris Smith:

Yeah, we just I would just share that, you know, wherever you're at, and listening to this is just as a possibility. Just know that you already matter. Just know that you already are enough. Know that you already belong. And know that you already are worthy. And what an amazing place to start from or come from. And then anything that you do on top of that is just bonus, it's a blessing, right? And you're worthy of like, forgiving yourself, you're worthy of these declarations, these truths that you can live into as a possibility. And yeah, a great place to start would be you know, the ultimate coach book and the ultimate coach Facebook group. And

Meredith Bell:

How can people connect with you and learn more about the work that you're doing, Chris?

Chris Smith:

Yeah, I would actually say probably the best way is my Instagram, I'm really committed to putting out messages that around love possibility and freedom, whether people ever end up talking to me beyond that, you know, I'm really committed to making a difference through content. And I put out a lot of content is just aimed at serving people. And I put a message out on Facebook yesterday that I said, Hey, I think I feel like I must warn all of you who follow me and end up becoming friends with me. I think it's only fair to say that I have a secret agenda, I do have an agenda. And is to manipulate you into an irrational sense of self love and belief in yourself. So just know that if you follow me and get around me, I'm going to try and manipulate you into believing in yourself and loving yourself. Yet to an irrational degree. So my Instagram is Chris Carter Smith. And I'd be honored to have any of you follow me and promise to share messages that elevate Inspire. Well,

Meredith Bell:

I feel sure you're going to get new followers Chris there because of what you've shared today and who you are being in the world. And I want to thank you for all that you brought of yourself and your wisdom today with our listeners. It's it's been fantastic. And I appreciate you.

Chris Smith:

Well, thank you. Thanks for all the work you do. And I know this is work and it's a sacrifice to you know, be one of the hosts and yeah, thank you for having me on. Actually

Meredith Bell:

Oh, I have to say, I love what I do. So I don't see it as worker sacrifice. I really enjoy it. And, and I think that it shows in the conversations because to me, this is an act of service that I love providing. So I love that thank you for acknowledging me and giving me a chance to let you know how I see this particular role. I love it. Thank you.

Meredith Bell:

Thank you for joining us today. If there's someone you know who could benefit from this conversation, please share this episode with them. Also, check out our website being movement.com You'll find valuable resources and links to connect to an engaging and wonderfully supportive community. Together, we can inspire and support each other on the path to a greater understanding of being. Until next time, take care and be kind to yourself