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007 – Dealing with Stress and Panic with Barbara Appelbaum of Appelbaum Wellness
Episode 725th May 2015 • Gift Biz Unwrapped • Sue Monhait
00:00:00 00:27:33

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As a motivational speaker, published author, certified wellness coach and person living with MS, Barbara Appelbaum of Appelbaum Wellness is inspiring hope through mindful health and a meaningful life. By combining healthy living, spirituality, and neuroscience principles, she helps people understand how to be proactive in their health care versus reactionary in their sick care, so they can feel great in their body and in their life. Her greatest wish is to never hear a person say, “I should be taking better care of myself.” Barbara is a member of the National Speaker’s Association, Barbara holds two master’s degrees, and is a certified member of the International Coach Federation, International Association for Health Coaches and American Association of Drugless Practitioners. She is a Certified Wellness Coach and Certified Integrative Nutrition Health Coach. She is also a consultant to the National Multiple Sclerosis Society Wellness Initiative and an Ambassador for the National Multiple Sclerosis Society – Greater Illinois Chapter. Barbara guest-lectures at Canyon Ranch in Tucson, AZ and is a regular contributor to Maria Shriver’s blog.

Motivational Quote

A Candle Flickering Moment

What she thought was a heart attack ended up affecting her entire life. It was really MS and brought her on the path she travels today. [9:35]

Business Inspiration

A dinnertime family game turns into the theory behind her latest book. Listen in to hear about The Panic Game. [10:51]

Success Trait

Empathy for others. Barbara shares a very poignant message about how this applies to all relationships. [14:12]

Productivity/Lifestyle Tool

Post It Notes – Post-it® Notes are now available in more than 150 countries. Collectively, there are more than 4,000 Post-it® Products. Microsoft Outlook – Outlook 2013 has a brand new look. It’s cleaner. It’s designed to help you focus on what’s important with a clear view of email, calendars, and contacts. You’ll be able to communicate more effectively by connecting efficiently with others.

Valuable BookFree Audio Book

Live In Wellness Now by Barbara Appelbaum 10% Happier by Dan Harris

Other Resources Mentioned

Free Chakra Color Test [3:06]

Contact Links

Website Facebook Twitter LinkedIn YouTube Live In Wellness Now
If you found value in this podcast, make sure to subscribe and leave a review in Apple Podcasts or Google Podcasts. That helps us spread the word to more makers just like you. Thanks! Sue

Transcripts

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Gift Biz Unwrapped,

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episode number seven.

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Hi, this is John Lee Dumas of Entrepreneur on Fire,

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and you're listening to The Gift of Biz Unwrapped.

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And now it's time to light it up.

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Welcome to Gift Biz Unwrapped,

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your source for industry specific insights and advice to develop and

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grow your business.

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And now here's your host,

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Sue Monheit.

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Hi, I'm Sue,

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and welcome to the Gift Biz Unwrapped podcast.

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Whether you own a brick and mortar shop,

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sell online,

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or just getting started,

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you'll discover new insight to gain traction and grow your business.

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I am so excited today to have Barbara Applebaum of Applebaum

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Wellness joining us as a motivational speaker,

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published author and certified wellness coach,

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Barbara is inspiring hope through mindful health and a meaningful life

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by combining healthy living spirituality and neuroscience principles.

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She helps people understand how to be proactive in their healthcare

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versus reactionary in their sick care so they can feel great

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in their body and in their life.

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She's a member of the National Speakers Association and holds two

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master's degrees,

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Barbara Guest lectures at Canyon Ranch in Tucson and is a

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regular contributor to Maria Shriver's blog.

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The reason I invited Barbara on the show today is that

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the focus of her second book,

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which is going to be coming out in the fall,

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focuses on a specific topic that I believe is something we

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all need in business.

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We're gonna get to this a little bit later,

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but for now,

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welcome to the show,

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Barbara. Thanks,

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Sue. I'm so excited to be here and thank you for

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asking me.

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I Am thrilled to have you here.

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Would you like to enhance anything that I've already shared with

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our audience about your background?

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Well, pretty much my background is primarily in healthcare.

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Throughout my work career there was a lot of stress and

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I think it's important for listeners to know that that's where

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I started with my business is stress.

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How do you get rid of it?

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And that's kind of where we're gonna head this session.

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And so I hope that it's of help to them and

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their businesses as well.

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I'm sure it will be because anyone who has started a

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business already knows that stress is pretty much an everyday occurrence.

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And I think people who are thinking about starting a business,

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just that whole idea of,

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you know,

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am I putting it together and gonna make it work,

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is stressful in and of itself.

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Exactly. And I basically want you all,

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as your listeners to know I've walked in your shoes,

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I continue to walk in your shoes.

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I get it.

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And I'm gonna help you figure it out.

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Perfect. Well,

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we like to align the conversation around the life of a

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candle. The light shines on you while you share your stories

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and experiences.

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Shall we light it up?

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Absolutely. All right.

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So help us envision your candle.

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What color is it,

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Barbara? My candle is purple.

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And why Purple.

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Some of your listeners may understand and know about the chakra

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points that we all have.

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Those are the energetic points in our body.

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And the crown chakra is a purple color,

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and it's our energy at our highest level.

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And the way I interpret it for myself is it's basically

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having the utmost faith in myself and in my own strength.

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So that's why I choose purple because it's the color of

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my crown chakra.

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I love the significance behind that color.

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I've never heard that before.

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That's fabulous.

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Oh, thanks.

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Yeah, if somebody wants to Google,

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Google chakras and colors and you'll see all the different energy

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points and the different colors that coincide because everybody has a

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different one that is more meaningful to them.

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Oh, that's very cool.

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Yeah. So I'm gonna put a challenge out to all our

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listeners. Google though.

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What are the two words again?

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Chakra? How do you spell it?

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I believe it's c h A k r A.

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Okay. But Google will correct it if it's wrong.

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And colors.

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All right,

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I'm gonna put that in the show notes for everybody.

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And anyone who does that comment at the bottom of the

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show notes,

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what your color is,

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that would be very interesting.

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And now Barbara,

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what is the motivational quote that you would put on your

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purple candle?

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My favorite quote,

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just when the caterpillar thought the world was over,

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it became a butterfly.

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Nice. Do you know who said that initially?

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You know,

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I don't.

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And so I always put it with anonymous next to it.

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There you Go.

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Yeah. Well that,

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that's how it will be represented here.

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Okay. All right.

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So as I alluded a little bit earlier,

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you have a book coming out in the fall and the

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concept and the strategy that you present addresses an issue that

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we as business owners encounter all the time.

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And I believe you have a technique to help address it.

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And I'm thrilled because I think you're gonna give us a

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little precursor of what this is all about.

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So I'm gonna let you take it away.

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Okay, thanks Sue.

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And yes,

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I'm gonna give everybody a little teaser because it is still

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a work in process and it will be coming out in

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the fall.

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And the basic premise is my theory I call gift,

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which seems appropriate for your audience since they are in the

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gift business.

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Totally. Yeah.

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So only this is not a tangible gift,

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this is a non-tangible gift.

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And let's face it,

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whether it's personal or professional,

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we often find ourselves faced with an adversity of some sort.

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And we're left asking ourselves,

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why me?

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Almost as if somebody pulls the rug out from under us,

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we're laying on our back,

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staring at the ceiling going,

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really? And that happens a lot,

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especially when we're an entrepreneur working on our own or with

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a small staff.

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And then what happens,

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right? We find ourselves panicking and getting stressed and anxious and

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worried and oh my God,

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and how am I gonna do this?

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So what I've come up with is a gift process that

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helps a person shift their thinking and their energy from this

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negativity or panic to instead saying,

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Hey, what's next?

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I've got this.

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I've got it under control.

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I know what to do.

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So facing adversity is truly one of life's gifts.

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And gift is the acronym I use to recognize that there's

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always an opportunity that lies within.

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And I'll be kind and give the teaser of what gift

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stands for,

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even though I don't wanna give away the whole book,

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G is get clear,

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I increase your awareness.

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F is focus and T is take action.

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And through the book and through the way that I teach

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these, a person will have it naturally.

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So namely when something bad happens or things get really stressful,

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they're not gonna think,

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Hmm, what am I supposed to do?

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Now they're gonna go,

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oh yeah,

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gift, get clear,

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increase awareness,

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focus, take action.

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I've got it.

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The whole idea of being able to take control of a

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situation is so I'm struggling for the word,

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but kind of like a peaceful concept to know that no

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matter what happens,

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if you use this theory of gift and take those steps,

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you can be in control of any situation.

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Exactly. It's empowering.

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Empowering, that's exactly the right word.

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I mean,

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I know even with my business,

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you know,

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if I heaven and forbid have a customer who's not happy,

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because I certainly want every single interaction to be absolutely perfect,

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which I know is unrealistic.

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You know,

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for whatever reason,

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whatever happens within business,

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right? I feel that panic starting to build up.

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And when that happens,

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I won't say I'm totally out of control,

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but it's certainly not a comfortable feeling and I don't have

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any method currently to kind of reign myself in.

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Exactly. And and what's so important for people to recognize is

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that's normal.

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We all have that.

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There are,

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we all have different triggers,

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but we all have the same emotions.

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No matter how we apply this to each of our own

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lives, it's still going to work.

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Yeah, and you're right,

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it's, it can be for business or for life,

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either. Either because the reality is whether you're personal or in

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business situations,

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how you think is going to affect how you feel and

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how you feel is going to affect how you behave.

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Shift one,

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you shift the rest.

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Very powerful.

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Can you go back and tell us a time when you've

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applied this technique already?

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Probably not even knowing it because you probably hadn't created gift

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at the time.

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You are absolutely right on that.

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And that was probably looking back my biggest aha moment.

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And that's how the book came to be.

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Cuz I thought,

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oh my gosh,

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I've been doing this forever.

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I didn't even know it.

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And honestly I would say I've used it a lot,

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but probably the most challenging thing that ever happened to me,

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which is also how in a way I got into the

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business I'm in,

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was that life changes in the blink of an eye.

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And for me,

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I got sucker punched one day in that I thought I

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had had a stroke while I was at work.

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And then the next thing I realized after hours and a

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couple days went by,

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it was much more serious than I had expected,

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sought out physicians.

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And over the course of three weeks came the dreaded diagnosis

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and the words my dear,

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beyond a shadow of a doubt,

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you have multiple sclerosis.

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And, and I mean I couldn't breathe.

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I could actually feel the room closing in around me.

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And as I trying to process all of it,

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I don't know,

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it just kicked into gear all of a sudden I was

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like, okay,

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you got this,

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you know what to do,

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you know,

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let's figure out what this is.

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Let's figure out what we're gonna do about it.

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And I,

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in essence in mentally took the stance of I'm going to

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fight this.

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And I just did it naturally.

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And I never really wondered why until I got into my

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career, got into writing the books,

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got into writing articles and started recognizing,

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wait a minute,

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there's kind of a plan here that my brain takes to

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tell you the truth.

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This came out of a game my parents used to play

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with us when we were kids and it was called the

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Panic Game.

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We'd sit around the dinner table and my parents would make

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up these crazy scenarios of,

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you know,

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you're trapped on the first floor and you can't get to

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the window and there's smoke everywhere and there's fire there and

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whatever. And we had to figure out how to get out

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of whatever situation without panicking.

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And that taught me how to think on my feet basically.

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They had no idea what they were doing,

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where they were leading you.

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They didn't,

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when I said to my folks one day,

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I said,

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you know,

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I had this aha moment and I'm writing this book cuz

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I really wanna help people.

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And I realized I have a gift,

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pardon the pun that I'd like to share with the world.

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And they said,

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well where on earth did you come up with this idea?

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And I looked at them and I said,

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just so happens around our dining room table from when we

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were kids and they couldn't stop laughing,

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they thought it was hysterical.

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Cuz you're right,

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they had no clue what they were doing.

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They just came up with this and thought it would be

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a smart thing.

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Kind of like how parents these days do stranger danger to

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teach their kids not to talk to strangers.

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Right. Well that's what my folks did.

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Only in those days we didn't have to worry about stranger

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danger. We had to worry about just danger around us as

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far as like if the house caught fire or whatever.

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Right. And you know,

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you're so panicked when a situation like that occurs that you

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can't rationally think or anything.

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So being able to kind of plan before an event happens,

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even though you might not know the specifics can be so

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valuable. Very true.

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And sometimes I find that I've planned before something happens and

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I don't even know I've done that.

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Because once this becomes part of your being,

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this process,

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it just turns into how your brain thinks.

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And so how long do you think once people are exposed

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to the detail,

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you know,

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you've shared with us a little bit now,

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but once the book comes out and once there's more detail

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and structure behind this,

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how long do you think it would normally take a person

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to kind of click into intuitively being able to jump into

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that process?

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Well I think a person would probably have to apply it

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several times because basically research shows that it takes 30 days

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to change a habit,

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90 days to make it stick.

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And I always think it probably takes about six months to

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make it stick.

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Truly. So once you make the change and then if you

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keep reinforcing and keep applying and keep doing one day,

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all of a sudden you're gonna recognize it's happening and you're

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not even consciously aware of it.

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So when that book comes out and you know,

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even just,

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you can kind of get a feel for the,

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the way it would roll just with what Barb's shared already.

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So you know,

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even when you're encountering panic now for the next few months,

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just think I'm going to have a really good structured solution

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come the fall.

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Yeah. And for those of us who are listening in the

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fall of 2015 or afterwards,

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it'll be available and ready for you.

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Let's move on,

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Barbara, to the reflection section.

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What is one trait that you naturally have that you would

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say has helped you to succeed?

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Probably the most important trait is empathy.

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I have learned to be able to put myself in other

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people's shoes without making it about me.

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A great visual for people to understand is that so many

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times when somebody has something going wrong,

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they start to share with a friend or a loved one,

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and then the person says,

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oh yeah,

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I remember when I had that happen to me.

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And they in essence get in the box with them and

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make it all about them.

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And I'm able to stay on the outside and say,

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Hey, yeah,

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you know,

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that's understandable,

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that's normal.

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I've seen that happen.

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What can I do to help?

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How can I help you?

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What do you need from me?

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I really believe that that has helped me succeed because it

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creates stronger relationships for me.

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I don't think people naturally realize that they're doing it.

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They don't.

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And I,

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I would like to challenge your listeners that the next time

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they have a conversation with someone and someone starts complaining or

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saying something about themselves to listen and to not say the

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word I in response to find other things to say,

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This is really good in terms of our interaction with our

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customers as well.

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Absolutely. Because your customer nine outta 10,

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the buying part or the actual work part is very small.

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Every customer,

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at least in my experience,

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wants someone to talk to every human being,

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wants someone to talk to.

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So this is a very helpful technique to open up that

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relationship because in business it's all about building relationships,

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Right? And it's all about how someone feels walking away from

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that interaction.

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Absolutely. Yeah.

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So whether it's an experience,

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we talk a lot about like in a brick and mortar

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store, having a nice atmosphere when someone comes in or if

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you're on an online shop,

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how do people feel when they first come into the website?

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You know,

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what's their experience?

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But here's an additional layer on top of that,

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you know,

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when you're interacting with them.

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You know,

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for me,

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I'm out at trade shows a lot,

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so you know,

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in terms of talking with them,

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get them talking about themselves,

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not reverting back to other things that are more of a

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focus on you.

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And I think the result then is you have people walking

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away, not even probably consciously understanding,

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but feeling really good about the interaction with you.

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And that just falls back on the reputation of your company

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and the feeling that they wanna do business with you.

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Exactly. And then there's gonna be the loyalty and hopefully a

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very long lasting relationship.

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And referrals.

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And referrals.

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Absolutely. We love those.

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Those Fabulous business building referrals.

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Barbara, What tool do you use regularly to keep productive or

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to help create balance in your life?

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Well there's two that I'll share and one of which you'll

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get a kick out of.

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One is old fashioned and that is Post-Its I am the

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Post-It Queen and I have them all over my bookshelves,

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all over my office.

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It is the only way I stay organized is putting my

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life on a Post-it and God bless the person who invented

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them. There's something rewarding too with just pulling down that piece

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of paper and being able to throw it away.

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Absolutely. Or stick it somewhere else that's less important for sure.

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Oh there you go.

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So do you categorize your post-its Sometimes.

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It depends what they're for.

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Cuz sometimes I have 'em for passwords and what have you

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and sometimes I have them for reminders.

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So it just depends.

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Got it.

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What's your second one?

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The second one,

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which I'm total junkie on,

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it is Outlook.

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I use Outlook,

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that's my calendar,

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my contacts,

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you name it,

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tasks, everything is there.

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Everybody says,

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but that's so old school.

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And I say don't mess if it's not broken.

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I went to it kicking and screaming years ago because the

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guys with whom I used to work said,

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you have to do this now.

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I am like an addict when it comes to Outlook.

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I cannot give it up.

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I am not a Google person or an Apple person.

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I am an Outlook person through and through.

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Well and that bodes to the fact that you know,

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if it is working,

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you don't always have to go after the next newest,

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biggest, best thing.

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Absolutely not.

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Because at least for me,

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cuz I'm not exactly tech savvy,

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it takes too much time and the learning curve,

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I just don't wanna have to mess with it unless it's

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something that's really going to have a positive impact on what

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I do.

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Right. If it's gonna provide something new that you need to

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enhance your situation,

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that's a different story.

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Absolutely. But otherwise it's not.

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No one said that one yet.

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I like that.

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I like being unique.

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So the next question asks about what book you've read lately

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that you think our listeners will find value in.

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But before we get to that book,

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I want you to talk a little bit about the first

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book that you put out.

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Ah, my first book is entitled Live in Wellness.

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Now I wrote it when I first got sick because I

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was keeping all my records in a spiral notebook and scribbling

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here and there and it was this just black spiral notebook.

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I wanted something pretty,

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I'm a girl,

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right? We like things pretty,

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it makes us smile.

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It kind of actually helps to kind of relieve the stress

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too. So I started looking and I found blank journals,

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line journals pretty saying,

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but nothing that really filled the bill for what I needed.

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And what I needed was a journal that would have space

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for medical,

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nutrition, fitness,

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and spirituality all in one place.

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So I wrote it,

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I put one together myself and had it published.

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So I basically hold the reader's hand through how to fill

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it out,

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but then they are left to their own to share and

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keep track of their own journey.

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And it's even such that you can stick it in a

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purse and a briefcase and take it with you.

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So when you have a doctor's appointment,

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you can just open it up and say,

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oh yeah,

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here's all the information I need for the paperwork they want

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me to fill out.

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Or if somebody says,

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Hey, you know,

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when's the last time you had this test?

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You say,

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oh, I have it right here.

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And you go to the page.

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There it is.

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It's very all inclusive.

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Yeah, that's fabulous.

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Okay, so it's called Live in Wellness now.

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And where can people find that?

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They can find it on Amazon and or they can go

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to my website live in wellness now.com.

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All right.

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And what was the other book?

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Oh, the other book.

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I recently read this and I just loved how he wrote

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it. Dan Harris,

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who is the ABC news anchor,

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he wrote a book called 10% Happier.

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He basically had meltdown on air one day and realized that

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he was having anxiety issues and he didn't know what to

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do about it.

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And this chronicles his journey to learning about and then implementing

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meditation in his life.

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And the way he says it,

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the way he teaches it,

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the way he talks about it is as if you're sitting

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and having a private conversation with the guy,

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he really wrote extremely well.

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And sometimes you laugh.

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Sometimes I found myself going,

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yeah, me too.

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Let's face it,

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we all have stress in our lives,

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stress kills and we all need to figure out a way

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to either use it for our benefit or diminish it for

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our benefit.

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And this book is a great one.

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It's a great tool.

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Do you meditate?

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I do.

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I probably meditate about five to 10 minutes a day someday.

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Hopefully I'll learn to do more.

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It takes a while to learn to,

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for me to sit still that long and quiet.

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But I do enjoy it.

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I also do meditate when I'm doing or practicing yoga.

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Find it great.

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I kind of tune out the instructor,

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I listen enough to do the moves.

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But other than that,

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I'm in my own little world and I also do something

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or practice something called healing prayer.

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It all blends together.

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Sounds very interesting.

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Meditation is something that I'm really trying to tackle myself,

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but I can't find time to do it,

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which is not the right answer.

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It's Not because that's why we need it in our lives.

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I know That I,

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I'm gonna get there at one point,

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To be quite truthful,

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I started with just like a minute a day.

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And I know a minute is nothing in the grand scheme

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of it all.

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And yet when you're trying to meditate for the very first

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time, a minute can seem like an eternity.

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So true.

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That's exactly where I'm at.

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I've been there,

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done that.

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Well, gift biz listeners,

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just as you're listening to the podcast today,

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you can also listen to audio books similar to the ones

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that Barbara Applebaum has just been talking about.

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To get an audio book from Audible for free,

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all you need to do is go to gift biz book.com

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and make a selection.

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That's gift biz book.com.

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Okay, Barbara,

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we're entering into the Dare to Dream section of our chat.

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I'd like to present you with a virtual gift.

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It's a magical box containing unlimited possibilities for your future.

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This is your dream or goal of almost unreachable height that

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you'd wish to obtain.

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Please accept this gift and open it in our presence.

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What is inside?

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Well, thank you very much for the gift and what's inside

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is to be a host of my own television talk show

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where I have guests,

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some famous,

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some just your average person talk about mindful health and living

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a meaningful life and really stressing the neuroscience principles,

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spirituality and healthy living.

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I don't like it when I hear people say,

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you know,

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I really should be taking care better care of myself.

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The reality is you can.

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And I wanna help people do that.

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And so my biggest dream is to be able to reach

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a really broad audience and spread my hope and inspiration that

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everyone can do it.

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And it is possible.

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And I think to have a talk show format to kind

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of be like the next Oprah would be awesome.

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That is a spectacular vision and I've seen you speak before,

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so you certainly have it in you girlfriend.

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Thank you,

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I appreciate that Someday.

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Fingers crossed.

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So everyone,

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when you see Barbara on television,

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you just remember you saw her here first.

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You bet.

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You bet.

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Or you heard her here first,

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I guess I ought to say.

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There You go and and bring your story.

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If I influenced you in any way,

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shape, or form today,

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shoot the talk show and be a guest.

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There You go.

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So Barbara,

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how can our listeners either get in touch with you or

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learn more about where you're speaking or just what you're all

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about? The best way is to go to my website.

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That's the hub for all information about me and my company.

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And it is applebaum wellness.com.

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And Applebaum is A P P E L B A U

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M wellness.com.

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So if you didn't catch any of the information that Barbara's

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shared with us today,

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don't fret.

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You can jump over to Barbara's show notesPage@giftbizunwrapped.com

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and there will have all the links to the tools and

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the books and everything that we've been discussing today.

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Thank you so much for your tremendously valuable gifts that you've

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shared with us.

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And Barbara,

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may your candle always burn bright.

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Thank you,

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Sue. Thank you so very much.

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Learn how to work smarter while developing and growing your business.

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Download our guide called 25 Free Tools to Enhance your business

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and life.

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It's our gift to you and available@giftbizunwrap.com

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slash tools.

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Thanks for listening and be sure to join us for the

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next episode.

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Today's show is sponsored by the Ribbon Print Company,

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looking for a new income source for your gift business.

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