Wow....in this episode I cover pretty much everything. How can you develop yourself over the long haul of life? What is the difference between you and a tree? Why is it OK not to be normal? If you need some encouragement then this is the episode for you.

Well, Hey everybody, Jonathan DOR with you.

Once again, welcome back to the daily podcast.

Really great to have the pleasure of your company.

I was checking the stats yesterday and the numbers have been really growing.

So for all of you out there sharing this in various places.

Thank you so much.

If you like what you're hearing, sending it on to family and friends or posting it

on your various social media platforms.

Is a real blessing.

So thanks for doing that.

It's great to see this reaching more people.

So let's get down to it.

The purpose of this podcast is to simply give all of us a little

nudge each day, a little bit of.

Inspiration education formation a little bit of something that just helps us

think more positively about our lives.

You know, as I've said so many times, you don't need a great

big complex plan of change.

To change your life.

What you usually need is just one or two good ideas that

you're actually going to use.

It doesn't matter if we have access to the best information.

What matters is what we actually do with the information we have.

So.

I was coaching somebody in the states recently, and there was sort of saying

to them, look, you've got to remember.

Here is the foundational principle feelings, follow actions,

feelings, follow actions.

A lot of times we want different things in our lives.

We want change, but we don't feel like it creating the chain.

So always remember regular listeners know this is one of my go-to mantra is that

those feelings that you're after in life really come at the end of taking action.

They don't usually precede them.

You know, sometimes they do sometimes.

You know, there'll be a, you'll feel positive about doing something

and you're moving that direction.

But so much of the time in life, creating something different, a better

marriage, better parenting, better, better career, a better exam results,

better sporting or fitness outcomes, whatever it is for any one of us

often, there will be some pushback.

There'll be some resistance.

I remember being in Jackson, Mississippi.

About 18 months ago and looking at from the hotel room, seeing.

These huge trains that cross the continental United States.

You know, these vast trains.

We have them here in Australia too often, but we don't see them that often.

Cause there.

Usually out in the mining areas, but I remember seeing this one in Jackson.

And being struck by the process of inertia, which is, you know, you've got

this vast array of wagons and you've got these two big diesel engines on the

front and you hear them powering up.

And you see.

But then for ages, there's no movement.

Because it takes this enormous amount of energy to begin the process of movement.

But once they move, once they get those wagons rolling, then you get momentum.

And then the engines don't have to put out as much power.

So it's similar for us when we're trying to create change that often.

You know, it's these, uh, It's the early phase.

It's that starting a new goals, starting a new thing in your life where

the resistance can be pretty tough.

So I want to give you that encouragement that if there's something in your

life right now that you would like to be a little bit different, do

not be surprised if it's difficult.

You know, it's so easy, isn't it?

So many people.

Uh, you know, early in January they had gym memberships go through the roof.

I was down in the gym this morning.

Uh, it's almost snowing outside.

And, uh, you know, you didn't have to fight for equipment this morning,

you know, during midweek sort of early in the morning, mid morning

now here it's, uh, it's not as busy, so there's this big influx when

everybody wants to create change, but then it's this longer road, right?

It's what we're doing every single day.

That matters.

It's not, we'll be doing this once.

You know, we occasionally it's matters what happens every day.

Right.

That was a long introduction.

I just want to encourage you.

Okay.

There's I'm trying to do, I'm just trying to say that.

When you're ready to do something different, just press

pay yourself per space itself.

Prepare yourself for difficulty, and then you'll get some momentum

once you've stuck at it now.

Today, I'm quoting from a American psychotherapist, uh, born in

1885 by the name of Karen Horney.

And I love a couple of quotes.

I want to share with you the first one.

Is great.

It's very simple.

She says a normal human being.

Does not exist.

So this is somebody who was a, you know, I had thought very deeply about

psychoanalysis had done a huge amount of counseling and psychotherapy with people.

And the good news she has first today is if you've ever felt that,

um, some of the stuff that goes through your head is just, if people

knew about it, It wouldn't be good.

Well, relax.

We're all pretty much somewhere on a large spectrum.

Um, a normal human being does not exist.

So if you ever feel that you need to be different.

Have you ever feel that if you are only like X fill in the blank, if I

had their looks, their hair, their money, their friendships, their

marriage, whatever, then I'd be happy.

Now everybody's got stuff, friends, everybody's carrying something.

So cut yourself some slack today, wherever you are in the journey.

Because according to psychotherapist, Karen, Horney a normal human being.

It does not exist.

I mean, how would you even define it?

Right.

I mean, think of the complexity of the human brain.

And, uh, all our life experiences, the hundreds of millions,

billions of permutations and things that have shaped us.

How could we point to one person and say, you know what, that's normal.

You ain't like that.

And you got a problem.

So be encouraged today, wherever you are in your journey.

That we're all traveling some way.

Now, the other thing I wanted to share with you from her as a

really cool quote here, she says this, there is no good reason.

Why we should not develop and change until the last day we live.

So listen to that again.

There is no good reason why we should not develop and change

until the last day we live.

So she's helping us understand that there, the moment in life that we

are truly stationary the moment in life, when you find yourself.

Really going nowhere for an extended period of time.

We have a big problem.

Now what I mean, there's times in life where you don't have calm

and some peace and things are kind of just ticking along nicely.

I'm talking about what happens when we really stop trying to grow.

And she's telling us here that there is no reason.

There's no psychoanalytical reason.

Why we should ever stop growing and changing.

People used to talk about.

You know, we're not so much human beings as human becomings.

I used to teach this on stage because my second master's program was in something

called philosophical anthropology.

And philosophical anthropology is kind of the deep philosophical

study of what it means to be human.

And I used to teach on stage that if you look at animals, right, if you

look at the natural world, I used to say to people, what can a dog do?

To be more dog-like.

You know, you've got a dog and what could that dog do to be more dog-like and

sometimes people have their hands and say, well, well, maybe you could bark more.

And I would say, well, you know what all that would do would make it.

We just make it a more annoying dog.

It wouldn't make it any more.

Dog-like it'd just be a dog to bark more.

You see, in philosophy, these things are called accidents of nature.

Um, You know, It was called accidents of our identity.

And by accident, it doesn't mean like, uh, you know, your trip over at an accident

means it's something, that's an aspect of something, but it's not crucial to it.

You know, so, you know, whether a dog, you know, imagine the dog had an illness

and it had, it's never barked again.

Would it still be a dog?

And everyone's got, I know you're all listening, going, Jonathan.

Have you been like hanging out with Yoda?

Like this is getting really weird.

Stay with me, right.

If they don't come back, it's still a dog.

It's just a dog.

That's what it is.

And someone could say, well, what if it was bigger?

And a German shepherd is a Regal dog and I'm going well, we could have arguments.

That's that's the aesthetics.

Isn't it.

That's like.

Our, our opinions about the ideal dog.

So, but a dog can't be any more dog.

Like it's just a dog.

It's what it does.

Cat can't be any more cat, like a lemming.

I, uh, I don't know, a salamander.

I'm just picking things out of the air here and the tree can't be any more.

Tree-like be different kinds of trees and you might see a huge Oak tree.

And so that's magnificent.

You see a little, little tree and say, well, it's just still a tree, right?

It's still doing its thing.

And here's the point.

Everything in the created world.

Is what it is.

It does what it does.

It has a kind of, uh, what we call a teleology.

Its purpose is to be what it is.

It's just to be what it is.

So a dog's job is to be a dog tree's job is to be a tree.

So what's a human's job.

And this is where it gets really interesting because humans are

the only thing that we know of that can become more human.

Bob.

And the question is, what does that mean?

Well, I'm going to argue.

Oh, really?

I do.

I didn't plan to do this today, but I think it's, it's good stuff.

Um, you know, the ancient Greeks used to believe in this thing called a Damon.

Not a demon Damon and a Damon was kind of like the way I explain it to people.

It's like software it's like the Greeks believed that stamped into

our inner being was our Damon, which was kind of like our source code.

And in that source code was everything that we could

possibly become in this life.

Right.

All the capacity, the energy.

All the good we could do the talents.

We could develop the music.

We could play.

The friendships we get to have all of this inner potential was stamped there.

Into our inner essence, our Damon.

And the Greeks believed that the job of in life was to become

what they called a Uday Mon.

And a UDA Mon was a person, man or woman.

Who had fully developed their Dame on and basically had become all

that they could become in life.

And so, you know, we, we, we point to people in life you're pointing

and Nelson Mandela's and your Dalai Lamas, and your point to famous

historical figures, you know, your George Washington's, Abraham Lincoln's.

You know, you could pick any number of amazing women, men and

women look up . She died at 23, 22, 23, and she fully was living.

Let me tell you that.

So the point is that we all have this inner capacity, this, all

this, this potential in life.

And I think what Karen Horney is reminding us of here.

Is that there's no excuse to stop growing.

There's just none.

That it's almost like the universe, God gives us this responsibility.

You know anything God expects us to do too much.

I don't think God's sitting there going, you know what?

Gosh, if this humanity doesn't fix this problem, what are we going to do?

The universe is going to explode.

Yeah, basically, God's got, I think.

I think God's got stuff covered.

All right.

I don't think he gets worried about much.

So the point is that, what does God want of us?

And if you're not a person of faith, Well, ask yourself the ubiquitous.

Supplementary question.

What is the universe?

One of us.

I think what it wants is for us to become fully who we are.

And that doesn't mean narcissism and that doesn't mean getting stuff.

It means.

Loving fully living fully experiencing fully.

After I get out of the studio, I'm a.

Just about to sign up for my next major endurance event, which

is a 255 kilometer day race.

On the bike rides.

There's 255 K and I think there's about four and a half kilometers

of vertical climbing in that.

And I've been, I've been just, you know, I did 185 the other day and I'm

like, well, I don't do two 55 and this little voice, you know, this voice cause

you have this voice to the voice goes.

Well, Jonathan, while you want to do that.

You know, you'll be tired and blah, blah, blah.

Why, why are you still doing this?

And I'm going, Hey, little voice, shush.

When, when I want your opinion, I'll give it to you.

So, you know, there's this desire in me to keep doing epic stuff.

So that when I am old, I say, damn, I remember doing that 255 K race.

And that was awesome.

And my kids see it and they go, dad, that's hectic.

And my kids grew up seeing that stuff.

I don't expect them to do it, but I want them to see

somebody who was trying to live.

So friends, if you're stuck right now, Uh, if you feel on the, of you dealing with

depression or crisis or pain, whatever it is, just hang in there because.

We're on a journey.

We're all on this journey together of growing and contributing

and developing ourselves.

So last thing is to, you know, is to keep an eye out for those

things that retard this journey.

And by that, I mean, Your phone mostly for most people.

Um, but I'm joking, but basically distraction, like, you know, food TV.

Uh, cynicism.

A lot of people these days, they get hung up in being, you know, a

bit despairing and cynical about the world and they withdraw into that.

And there's all these different ways that we can retreat from life.

So, what we need to do is look into our lives and look at those things that stop

us from living and contributing fully.

All right.

We have covered some ground friends.

Haven't we we've done dogs, trees, cat, salamanders.

Karen.

Horney his perspective on a normal humanity.

We've done.

Eudaimonia we've done philosophical anthropology and

you're getting this for free.

They'll gratitude people.

Um, and if you'd like to support me, please come across to patrion.com

and, uh, if you could make a contribution there, that'd be awesome.

This is blessing to you.

Please do that.

Uh, friends, that's it today.

Get out there, grow, contribute, um, develop yourself.

Find something cool to do start something that you've been avoiding.

Uh, make that phone call, fix that friendship.

Do something grow, live change before the clock stops.

Okay.

Please hit subscribe.

Make sure you've subscribed to the podcast wherever you're hearing it.

Everything else you need to know about me, you can find on the

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Uh, patrion.com.

Do a search.

Jonathan Doyle hit subscribe, share this with some friends.

God bless you, everybody.

Uh, I really feel.

You know, as I'm in the studio here, I just feel that someone's listening.

And her mom is bad apart from her and I you're out there.

And I hope this has been a blessing to you.

So, you know, hanging in there.

The world is a wide and good place and better days are ahead all right my name

is jonathan doyle this has been the daily podcast god bless you everybody And i'll