It's been 20 years since McDonald's blessed the world with the McAfrika and 14 years since they brought back the sequel: the McAfrica. Are you confused? Good. It's time to sit down and take a bite of absurdity as Colin navigates us through the annals of McAppropriation.

You may have wondered in your days, "what ever happened to that snack I used to love?" Well look no further! Colin is here with a brand new segment called SNACK ATTACK! where we highlight snacks of yesteryear. And why not wrap in some PR catastrophes while we're at it?

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**lyrics:

We always eatin' Arch Delux. We always eatin' Onion Nugs.

We always eatin' Bagel Bites. We always eatin' Waffle Crisp.

We always drinkin' Crystal Pepsi.We always drinkin' Ecto-Cooler.

We always drinkin' Squeeze-Its. We always drink Sprite Remix.

We always eatin' Cheeze-Its.

We always drinkin' Surge. We all just speakin' words... We all just snackin'.

We all just snackin'.

We all just snackin.'

We all just snackin.'

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Hi, everybody! This is your host of a brand new segment! Or a brand new podcast... We're calling it a brand new segment, because it's going right in the middle of Ruining Your Childhood - The Pitfalls of Nostalgia. So if you're familiar with our podcast, you'll know that we like to do some deep dives into some media.

So, I decided to take that same kind of approach with something brand new here. So: what is the name? SNACK ATTACK! That's right! Cause we're snackin'!

So, what is SNACK ATTACK!, you might ask? Well, SNACK ATTACK! is a little something that I like to do, where we highlight nostalgic food items, PR failures, you know, just fantastic things that don't really exist anymore; you can't really find at these junctions, you know? So what are some examples you might ask?

Well, first one that we're going to hit is two sandwiches with the same name the McAfrika - spelt with a "k"... And the McAfrica, spelt with a "c"... Yes, both McDonald's products. So what are they? What the hell is this? What are you talking about?

The McAfrika... Why would they name it that? That sounds horrible? Well, we're going to do a little deep dive on the McAfrika, like I just said, so let's take it back in time: 20 years.

Yes. This is the 20th anniversary of the Beloved, the famous, the missed: McAfrika. And by missed I mean it is literally missing from the Internet in many instances... There's a lot of information that has been scrubbed about it; it is kind of interesting... So I was able to have found bits and pieces, a lot of conflicting information, and after some deep dives, research, heading down to the public library picking up some, you know, olddddddddd media, I was able to stitch the pieces together.

So like I said, 20 years ago...

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August and September 2002, McDonald's decided to launch a promotional endeavor in the countries of Norway and Denmark, mainly Norway. What did they do, and what were they promoting?

Well, they were promoting the 2002 Winter Olympics. Where were those Olympics? Salt Lake City. Why was Norway promoting it? Maybe they were bidding for their own Winter Olympics?

Either way, Norway was promoting the 2002 Salt Lake City Winter Olympics, and they decided to launch a brand new product... Okay, a promotional product called the McAfrika based on quote, an authentic African recipe the McAfrika was spelt with a "k" and it consisted of beef, cheese, tomatoes and salad (or lettuce) in a pita. Okay? Just a normal burger... In a pita.... They called it the McAfrika.

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Obviously, taking a country throwing the "Mc" in front of it... A lot of weird facets to that... It almost feels like the embodiment of cultural appropriation. But then obviously, there's a bunch of extra layers to it. The fact that you know, white people went to Africa and took many of them slave and never paid them back.... Yeah, so many different things. Okay, so many different things we can go into. It's absurd.

So they make the McAfrika to the outcry of some of the citizens and you'd think that "okay, once the people hear about this McAfrika sandwich, what would McDonald's do?"

So... Whatcha wann' do?

First thing they would do probably would be taken down, right? That's what the logical person would do...

Well, that wasn't the case, okay?

Come again?

The McAfrika was left to run for its entire promotional time, and the only thing that was really done by McDonald's was they allowed certain PR groups, certain aid groups to put a donation box and offer a portion of the proceeds of the sales of JUST the McAfrika during the sale of the McAfrika to be donated to certain charities and stuff like that.

So McDonald's kind of doubled down... They kind of didn't really do anything. And they kind of just let it all slide away the infinite lasting power that is McDonald's, right?

Another added layer to the fun, you know, of all of this is at the same time McDonald's released the McAfrika sandwich, there was about 12 million African citizens suffering from a food shortage due to a very, very bad drought that was hitting the entire southern African continent at the time.

So launching a sandwich by McDonald's - the McGluttony, you know, that represents McObese America, right? We're launching that... It's called the McAfrika, and they're just gonna go with it... They didn't even give a crap, they just doubled down.

And not only did they double down, but six years in the future. That is 2008.

We're sending you back... To the future!

Talking about the Beijing Olympics.

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Okay, now the Beijing Olympics come around... What does McDonald's decide to do? They decide that they need to bring back a little bit of something from the past. Okay, a little bit of nostalgia, so to speak.

And so what were people screaming for more than anything else? More than anything else!?!? What did everyone want from McDonald's? They wanted the McAfrika...

And so McDonald's sat down in their boardrooms, as the 2008 Olympics came around. And they said, "hmmm... How do we bring back the McAfrika without as much of that public outcry?"

Well, answer to your question here: A little bit of a promotional deal, as McDonald's loves to do.

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You know, sidenote here: McDonald's loves to do promotional deals, as they invest in real estate, they have money to really do a lot of experimentation with their products. And so it ends up with a lot of failures like this. And for that reason, I love it.

So this promotional deal here was called the Flavours of the Games. Now the Flavours of the Games... What, you know what happened with the Flavours of the Games?

Well, the Flavours of the Games... They were like, you know what? Well, what's the first one?

I figured it out...

It's the McAfrika. Obviously... So they took the same recipe, apparently, you know, and they decided to tweak it a little bit.

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This time, they just put it on a bun... You still get your beef, cheese... You get your tomatoes, you get your lettuce...

But!

What comes on the McAfrica that didn't this time time? Oh, yes, quote "exotic African sauce."

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Can you say that again?

Yes, this burger comes with "exotic African sauce". What's in "exotic African sauce?" I don't know. I did some deep dive digging, right, and I managed to find that it's essentially curry, mayonnaise, and a little chili powder, right? That's what the "exotic African sauce" is.

And so not only did the McAfrica come out, they were like, Okay, we need to pad this one. Okay, we need to add a little bit of extra... We need to, we need to insulate this idea because it is so good! The McAfrika is the best idea we've ever had. So that's why we had to bring it back again.

Okay? You know, we were sorry, at McDonald's. We were so- we were super sorry that you know, we launched our McAfrika burger at a super insensitive time when there were 12 million people starving and you know... We didn't want to feed any of those 12 million people, we just wanted to profit off of the name of Africa...

But you know, we're super sorry, okay?

So this idea is fucking brilliant (pardon my French). *slight chuckle

It's not funny!

Okay, so Flavours of the Games: a new flavor every two weeks!

Limited Edition!

Now, what comes along with the McAfrica? Well, they're like, "I got an idea..." How about the McAsia Wrap?

Is that some sort of sick joke?

Yeah, that sounds great. Okay, yeah. The McAsia Wrap. Oh, yeah, let's do it. Let's--

**sniffing sound effect

-- uh, oh yea, that sounds like a great idea.

Okay, so what's in the McAsia Wrap? All right, so the McAsia Wrap is fried chicken strips, tatsoi salad, cucumbers, and a sweet chili sauce, mayonnaise and wrapped in a tortilla. Because you know what's Asian?

You know every time I go to Asian restaurants -- Chinese, Thai, Vietnamese -- you know, any sort of Vietnamese restaurant even Indian you know what I love? Love those homemade tortillas that I get, okay?

So the McAsia Wrap comes out, and they're like

"Yeah, that's a - goddamn that's a good idea! All right."

All right, we got the McAmerica Bagel. McAmerica. Mac America. McMerica - it should just been McMerica.

Let's let's be let's be real should have been McMerica... It was a lightly toasted bagel with a freshly cracked egg, a premium rasher of bacon, and spicy ketchup. So along with the McAmerica Bagel, we got the McAustralia sandwich... The McAustralia. I don't know... Jesus, that was a bad accent.

All right. This burger has a pineapple ring, bacon, bacon again - so apparently it's got a lot of bacon - tomato, cheese, beef patty, lettuce, and barbecue sauce.

Doesn't sound very Australian... I mean, maybe it's Australian? I don't know too many Australian people... I know a couple people that live in New Zealand... You know, maybe but that doesn't sound... Pineapple and barbecue? Is that an Australian thing? If there's any Australian listeners out there, please chime in! Because I have no clue.

Ummmm, I don't even know.

So let's recap this, right? We got the McAfrica. That's right!The McAfrica! "A taste of Africa with two all beef patties, cheese, fresh tomato, and lettuce dressed with an exotic African sauce of mayonnaise and spices."

We got the McAsia Wrap. We got the McEurope Burger...

Oh yeah, I forgot to talk about that one. What's the McEurope Burger you ask? Okay! It's a crispy chicken fillet with shavings of Parmesan cheese, traditional Napoliatana sauce made from rich tomato, oregano and basil.

So essentially we have a McChicken Parm... A McChicken Parm... the McChicken Parmigiano... Parmigiana...

So, once again, we're recappin'... We got the McAfrica! We got the McAsia! We got the McAmerica! We got the McAustralia! And we got the McEurope and we are crushing it, okay?

We have just launched one of the greatest promotional campaigns of all time... McDonald's...

**airhorn sound effect

Damn, dude, someone's getting a raise over this one, okay? Flavours of the Game...

Game recognize game, Granddad...

Every two weeks you get a new flavor!

Brand new!

McAfrica!!!!!

Make sure you get a good rasher/ration of that exotic curry sauce that is prime... Based off African recipes... Everything about it is amazing... But also! Make sure that you spend money in McDonald's and don't actually donate to charities or do anything like that.

Stay fat.

Stay obese.

McAmerica...

We're crushin' it...

So remember: eight years into the 21st century... Seven years after 9/11...

McDonald's decided that they had an important decision to make... "Shit, let's bring back the McAfrika. It's time! It's time to think about a better day back when..."

Whereas it's been 14 years since we've seen it last and 20 years since its introduction, we can ask you at McDonald's... Corporate America... When will you give us the McAfrica again?

When will we taste this? Exotic mayonnaise and African spices... This blend... Mmmhyes...

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**lyrics start

We always snackin'... SNACK ATTACK!

We always snackin'... SNACK ATTACK!

**music fades out

We always snackin'... SNACK ATTACK!

We always snackin'... SNACK ATTACK!

We always snackin'... SNACK ATTACK!

We always snackin'... SNACK ATTACK!

We always snackin'... SNACK ATTACK!

We always snackin'... SNACK ATTACK!

We always snackin'... SNACK ATTACK!

We always snackin'... SNACK ATTACK!

We always snackin'... SNACK ATTACK!

I want to thank all of you for tuning in, listening, supporting. And I want to give you an opportunity to support more! So SNACK ATTACK! is going to be a part of the Ruining Your Childhood family! And you can find it on the Ruining Your Childhood RSS feeds anywhere. The link will be in the bio, in the description, all of the things...

You can find us along with the other Ruining Your Childhood conversations that myself... -

Hmm... I just realized I never introduced myself... If you're a fan of Ruining Your Childhood, then you would know me as Colin aka Hashy AKA a bunch of other things... But you can call me what you want, I don't really care. I could just be Narrator, you know... It could be what it wants.

Like I said you can find this with the other conversations on the Ruining Your Childhood feed along with myself, Rob, Kevin and Vaughn. Good folks! And the "Words w/" segment where I sit down and interview some good people learning about some good things: everything from music production, to sports business, to tattooing, and more!

So SNACK ATTACK! Look out for the next edition coming out soon. What is it going to be on? I won't tell you but you'll just have to stay tuned to find out...

So, as you heard from the theme song here, you know, we're always snackin'.

That's a cliffhanger like a Sylvester Stallone movie from 1990-whatever... You know what I'm talking about? Yeah...

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Feel free to give us a little bit of support, help us grow. We're going to start getting back into the normality of the summer and to regular releases, and we're going to have some really good stuff coming for you, so thank y'all for your patience. Thank y'all for listening in!

Love you much