alright, joining us today is Kolby Wilke.
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:Welcome back listeners, and
thank you for joining us today.
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:Rather than me try to introduce Colby and
get the facts wrong, I'm gonna ask him
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:to take a few minutes here at the top of
the episode just to introduce himself,
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:maybe explain a few key terms that we
might see on his social media sites such
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:as Wayfinder is an interesting term to me.
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:And we'll see where the
conversation leads from there.
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:So Colby, if you would just tell
us about yourself and your work.
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:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: Sure.
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:Uh, thanks for having me on.
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:I, uh, work as a wayfinder, which
to me means I help people find their
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:way to who they really are and to
the life that's been calling them.
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:I believe that everyone has a life that's
calling them, that we tend to resist
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:because it would involve change, shaking
things up outside of our comfort zone.
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:Uh, I have an intuitive gift where I'm
able to sense, uh, what someone's soul
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:is trying to lead them towards and
what is in their way, what's in their
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:blind spot, causing them suffering.
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:And with this gift, I'm able
to help somebody spot it.
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:What they've been denying,
abandoning, stepping over so that
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:way it finally can be resolved.
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:'cause when we face off with
compassion, what's been in
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:our way, it, it dissolves it.
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:Um, people come to me with all
sorts of problems, procrastination,
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:self-worth, anxiety, depression,
phobias, even physical problems.
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:And many of them have read a
whole bunch of self-help books.
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:Many of them have sat at the
feet of, gurus had had like a
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:shaman or a healer work on them.
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:Yet true wellbeing still eludes them,
even though they've made a lot of effort.
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:The truth is you can't get
to wellbeing with effort.
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:You just can't.
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:That's not how it works.
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:You can't get to wellbeing by trying
to bend yourself into some version
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:of better true wellbeing comes from.
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:Allowing yourself to be who you are.
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:And then somebody might
say, Colby, well who's that?
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:And I'll say, let's go Look, we're so in a
rush to get somewhere called satisfaction,
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:but as you know, many listeners know
it's nowhere out there, it's in here.
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:Um, and many of my people, my
clients, my students have been
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:looking quite earnestly, right?
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:Um, and they go to folks who will
show them what worked for them,
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:like what's been their path, and
then they'll share their path.
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:The benefit of going to an
intuitive, a psychic is to help, I
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:help people sense their own path.
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:Everyone has a particular path that
their soul is inviting them, and I'm
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:able, able to sense it and then I'm
able to help somebody else sense it.
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:And once you know what your
soul is inviting you to do.
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:Life becomes a lot easier.
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:Russell Newton: i, I think in my
experience when I speak with people,
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:if you say you're an empath or
along those lines, they get all
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:not defensive, but skeptical maybe.
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:Can you define the term
empath as you see it?
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:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: Sure.
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:So empath or empathy is being
able to tune to somebody else.
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:Usually empathy is both
a gift and a curse.
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:Empathy for many people.
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:Some people come in with it, other people.
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:I came in with it and it got further
developed because I was raised in
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:a rather dysfunctional home, so I
had to, I would be like, oh, is it
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:okay to go down into the kitchen?
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:And I would sense who's in the
kitchen and sense what their
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:mood was by stretching my field.
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:We have a jelly bean of energy around
us, above, below to the sides, and
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:you can stretch it to include another
and sense their feelings, their
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:state, what they're thinking about.
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:It's a skillset.
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:In large part, empathy means I'm
able to tune into you the problem
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:with empathy or the challenges.
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:I'm so good as an empath tuning into you,
but I may not be great at tuning into me.
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:Or tuning into higher consciousness.
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:Some people like to be around
empaths because, oh, this
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:person understands me easy.
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:Some people don't like being around
empaths because everyone wants to be seen,
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:but not everyone wants to be seen through.
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:Seen through means.
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:I see your stuff and what you're
stepping over and your ego.
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:A lot of people don't want that.
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:Now.
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:That's a helpful skill for
those people who want that
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:and wanna work on themselves.
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:But other people are like, get outta here.
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:You know me better than I know me.
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:That frightens me.
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:An empath needs to learn how
to control their empathy.
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:'cause an empath usually cares more
about the other than themselves.
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:And therefore resents other
people not doing the same empaths
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:generally want to live in Mr.
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:Rogers neighborhood where
everyone is kind, everyone is
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:compassionate, everyone like shares
like, oh yeah, that was my ego.
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:I'm so sorry, but we don't live in Mr.
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:Rogers neighborhood.
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:And if you're an empath, you're
like, I want to, but I don't.
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:And I'm mad about it because I'm kinder
and more compassionate than other
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:people, and people aren't kind and
compassionate to me, it feels unfair.
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:So an empath needs to learn to
control their empathy and to tune into
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:themselves and higher consciousness.
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:That's the path of an empath.
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:Russell Newton: a skillset is always
placed for those that excel at something
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:on top of a certain level of talent.
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:You said you came in as an empath,
so is that, that's something, uh,
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:correct me if I'm wrong, something
you feel you were born with.
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:through work and sensing and
uh, consciousness, were able
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:to extend that skillset.
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:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: Everyone could
do math, but not everyone's an Einstein,
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:right?
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:Empathy is a skill.
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:Some have a lot of it and
develop it, and some not so much.
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:So I came in rather open and
not very defined as a self.
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:I, I, so I had very little
self-worth, self-esteem.
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:I was kind of just open, right?
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:And so, yes, I came in with it,
and I've developed it because I
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:wanted to be safe in my family.
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:One, two, my career
lends itself to empathy.
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:People want to feel like
they're understood by me.
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:Um, and people love empaths because
it's, they have, they don't have
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:to work as hard to be understood.
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:So somebody who has a difficult
time expressing themselves,
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:finding the words, loves an
empath, because I'll do it for you.
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:No, no problem.
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:And then eventually it kind of
backfires in relationship because,
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:wait a minute, get outta my head.
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:Get outta my space.
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:Empaths tend to bleed.
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:Into people, which initially,
like in high school and middle
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:school and college and in your
twenties, makes you rather popular.
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:But by the time you leave your
thirties, you, you occur to somebody
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:as too much or boundaryless.
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:And so then becomes the process of, for
most empaths, okay, this is not working.
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:How do I find myself?
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:I can be empathic.
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:That doesn't mean I'm present.
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:And presence is the game, is
the winning in, in the old lotto
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:commercials, something along the
lines of in order, uh, how does it go?
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:You gotta be present to win.
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:That was the.
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:Russell Newton: To win.
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:Yes.
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:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: Present to win.
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:If you're not present to yourself,
you can't win in this game of life.
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:See?
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:Right.
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:So I see a lot of couples and the
male, the person will say, my, my,
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:my wife thinks I don't understand
her feelings and wants me to get it
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:without her having to say something.
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:And she'll be like,
yeah, like you do Colby.
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:And I'm like, one, I'm a homosexual.
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:One.
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:Two, I'm not your husband.
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:Two and three.
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:That's not his job.
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:Your job wife in this case is
to share what you're feeling
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:eloquently enough for him to get it.
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:Your associating wife, that he
doesn't care about you because
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:he doesn't understand you.
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:No.
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:He doesn't understand you because
you are not using language affect
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:to get him to understand you.
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:And he needs to be open to like, I
don't get it and I want to get it.
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:Help me to get it.
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:Explain it in a different way,
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:Russell Newton: Hmm.
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:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: please.
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:. Empathy usually comes
from the female essence.
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:Doesn't mean you have to be, you
know, have the gonads of a female,
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:but it's usually associated with
the feminine part of the being.
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:It's receptive, right?
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:So I am receptive to things that has its
pluses and it has its minuses, right?
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:People who are not empathic tend to.
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:Like, be self-focused, are able
to advocate for themselves.
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:If you don't like me, that's okay.
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:That's very non empathic, right?
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:Very male.
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:Very male.
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:Empathic em, empathy.
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:Very female.
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:Not to say you need to
be in a female body.
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:I'm not.
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:Russell Newton: Mm-hmm.
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:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: So I, I just
wanted to throw that in a little.
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:Russell Newton: No, that's, that's great.
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:Thank you.
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:So kind of an aside, just definition
wise, a term I've run across, I've done,
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:I have a particular author that deals
with self-development from more of the
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:empathic or the empath side, I think.
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:And he uses the term several times
in his books about highly sensitive.
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:Is that something that.
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:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: There's highly
sensitive people and there's empaths,
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:two different groups, some overlap.
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:Russell Newton: Some overlap.
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:Okay, great.
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:Can you expand on that a little
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:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder:
So highly sensitive.
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:People are sensitive to, there's an
acronym that I don't remember off
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:the top of my head, but sensitive
to noise, sensitive to environment,
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:some sensitive to energies,
sensitive to their own emotions.
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:Sensitive to deregulation, right?
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:Sensitive.
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:And there's many different
ways of being sensitive, right?
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:Russell Newton: Okay.
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:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: Empaths are
sensitive to feelings and energy.
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:You could be a highly
sensitive person, person.
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:I'm sensitive to sound.
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:I'm sensitive to environments
and have no empathy.
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:None.
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:Russell Newton: Very good.
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:Very good.
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:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: are highly
sensitive people who have empathy.
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:There is a lot of overlap, but not
necessarily, I'm highly sensitive.
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:Oh, I sensitive and I'm empathic.
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:So double whack if you would.
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:Russell Newton: Okay.
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:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: At the end of
the day, and I use these terms, I'm not
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:a big term person because I'm not big
on putting yourself in a bucket because
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:there are all sorts of energies that
come with labeling yourself, right?
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:All sorts of terms.
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:So for instance, if I call upon
creator, there are associations
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:with that term, other associations
with God or Lord or Yahweh or Allah.
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:So you wanna make sure the term
you're calling yourself or calling on.
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:Is the associations you want.
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:So for instance, if
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:Russell Newton: Tell me a little bit more
about the associations you want and how
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:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: as a gay
man, if I call on the Christian God
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:and the Christian God has
overlays of homophobia, that's
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:not gonna work so well for me.
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:Russell Newton: Okay.
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:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: Even if I don't
know it, it's not gonna work so well.
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:'cause I'm calling upon a form a, a form
of energy that has distaste for who I am.
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:So you wanna be very careful
about labeling yourself.
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:Like I wouldn't run around calling myself
a highly sensitive person or an empath.
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:I say I have highly developed empathy,
which then I'm more in control.
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:I.
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:I say I'm highly sensitive to
energy, but I'm not gonna label
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:myself highly sensitive people.
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:'cause once you label yourself,
are you labeling yourself for
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:why so people understand you?
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:'cause you're identifying
because you're a victim.
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:Why you're identifying that way.
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:Just share what your experience is and
that way you let go of all of that stuff.
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:Russell Newton: The, the very essence of
self-awareness that I am not this thing.
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:I feel this thing or I can do this thing,
but that not, that doesn't identify me.
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:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: Right, right.
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:Like I say to I, I would say
like I'm, I say I'm gay, but the
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:truth is I fall in love with men.
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:That's more descriptive.
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:Now, if I have associations that
gay is bad from childhood, gay is
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:wrong, then I'm loading that into
my consciousness unconsciously.
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:So why don't I just
say what's true for me?
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:I fall in love with men.
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:Great.
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:Now I have to deal with all
that rest of that stuff.
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:Russell Newton: Right.
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:Um,
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:so another branch then, you were on the
border of spirituality versus religion.
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:Possibly things that maybe in a
lot of people's minds might be
254
:very similar, but spirituality
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:you mentioned shamanism.
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:And all the deities that we might
identify with or speak to or communicate
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:with a religion such as Catholicism or
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:And you started to go into some of that.
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:Maybe I cut you short.
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:Did you complete your thought with the
deity or the power, the consciousness
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:that you should be communicating with?
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:Or did?
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:Did I cut you off?
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:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: So, let's see.
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:There is no right or wrong way.
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:I.
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:The benefit of religion in my
opinion is it's a tried path.
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:Many people have walked it and there's
a lot of energy gathered around it.
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:And so it, you can get somewhere
assuming there's a place to get faster.
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:If you identify as a Christian, a
Jew, a Buddhist, whatever it is,
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:I don't, and I was raised Jewish.
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:I'm Jewish because of my culture,
but I don't exactly identify with.
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:The religion never really took from me.
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:So I am somebody who kind of
samples and kind of makes up my mind
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:and feel into what works for me.
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:And I think the benefit of that is
I'm finding my own path as opposed
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:to being told what my path is.
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:And it lends itself to me helping
people find their own path.
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:Yet, if a religion calls to you
go, it's, there's huge benefit
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:of participating in a religion.
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:Huge benefit.
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:And there's, you know, a
little bit of detriment.
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:'cause you want to think for
yourself, you wanna make decisions.
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:Um, there's a lot of hatred within
religion, some religion, right, that
285
:you want to be on the lookout for.
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:We want to find our way, but we also
don't want to give away our power.
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:And we want people to contribute to us.
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:So there's this paradox
as spirituality is right.
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:I want to be me and I want to allow God.
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:Well, those seem like they're
in conflict, but they're not.
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:It's a paradox.
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:People want simplicity.
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:And it's not simple.
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:It's not simple at all.
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:So many people in my industry.
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:And I apologize on behalf of my industry
for engaging in spiritual materialism.
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:Meaning that, hey, if you
meditate, think positive, expect
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:the best, do appreciation,
good things will come to you.
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:And if good things don't come to you,
the Maserati, the house, whatever
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:the case may be, the job, the wife,
the boyfriend, whatever, then that's
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:because you are doing something
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:Russell Newton: Hmm.
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:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: that's not
spirituality, that's materialism.
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:Maing
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:Russell Newton: Excellent,
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:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: right?
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:Russell Newton: excellent.
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:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: Right.
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:Spirituality in my not so humble opinion,
not so humble, is relinquishing the self.
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:I.
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:Now I am 58.
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:Right?
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:I'm 58.
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:That's what, how old I am.
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:Okay.
316
:Where you act surprised, please.
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:No, I'm kidding.
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:So I'm 58 and I'm not the same
man that I was five years ago,
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:10 years ago, 15 years ago.
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:I have shed cells, I have let go, right?
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:I was a boy who couldn't
raise his hand in class.
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:Now I talk very freely.
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:I was a boy who couldn't, you
know, honor his sexuality.
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:Now I am out and about, right?
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:So you become different.
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:Our society tends to reward
people who maintain a self
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:and build a kingdom around it.
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:Russell Newton: Hmm.
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:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder:
That's not spirituality.
330
:Spirituality is the relinquishment
of self, which involves
331
:the relinquishment of ego.
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:And the relinquishment of doubt
and giving in to the great mystery.
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:We don't know how this
thing works called life.
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:We don't know.
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:And there are people in my industry
trying to tell you, yes, I do know these
336
:are the laws, this is how it works.
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:And yes, there is a point to it.
338
:Absolutely.
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:There's some sure evidence and yeah, sure.
340
:Absolutely.
341
:But it's not, it's not that.
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:It's not that.
343
:So yeah, there you go.
344
:He didn't ask, but he's Roland.
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:Russell Newton: that, that's great.
346
:Um, so let's, let's take a step
back from the in depth part there.
347
:You, you mentioned in the, in
the last several sentences,
348
:your industry quite a bit.
349
:What, uh, on a day-to-day.
350
:Process.
351
:What is your industry?
352
:This, these are things I probably could
have learned honestly by going in depth
353
:through some of your material, but I
wanted the conversation to be fresh.
354
:So rather than me try to
interpret what I'm seeing.
355
:You know, some of these questions
might have been obvious in your social
356
:media presence, but, uh, is you, you
mentioned industry, you mentioned
357
:your clients and your students.
358
:So tell us on a day-to-day basis,
what, what is, do you run a practice?
359
:Are you a, an educator
360
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: Sure.
361
:Russell Newton: or you
do all those things?
362
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: I would
say my industry is along the lines
363
:of metaphysics, self-development,
personal development.
364
:Uh, I would be classified as
an intuitive guide or healer.
365
:I see clients, individuals, I see couples.
366
:I teach classes on how to find
your path, how to increase your
367
:intuition, how to let go of trauma.
368
:Um, I do interviews like this one.
369
:Um, I have a fair bit of social
media presence that I'm working on.
370
:And, uh, yeah, so my day is filled
with sessions, classes, and, uh,
371
:writing emails for the most part.
372
:Uh,
373
:Russell Newton: you're an entrepreneur
or, uh, maybe not entrepreneur, but
374
:basically you're, self-employed.
375
:Yeah, same.
376
:Same here as, uh, so many of
us, uh, seem to be now on this.
377
:Uh, and I understand the whole
kind of, the whole social
378
:media trying to build all that.
379
:It's a constant
380
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: my
381
:Russell Newton: and a
382
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: God.
383
:Right.
384
:Russell Newton: it?
385
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: It's really,
it's really tough because you don't,
386
:Russell Newton: It is.
387
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: you want to be
true to who you are and so many people are
388
:screaming for attention and overpromising
389
:Russell Newton: Yes.
390
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder:
on people's desperation.
391
:And so, you know, it's just really, it's
difficult to raise beyond the noise.
392
:It is
393
:Russell Newton: It, it
is very, yes, it is.
394
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: really.
395
:Russell Newton: Um, notice when I look
at your YouTube page, which I, I have
396
:up here, and the, it's striking that
nothing um, thumbnails is all caps with
397
:three exclamation points at the end.
398
:Right?
399
:That's, I I see it, but I put a video
out I try to make a headline that is
400
:informative and accurate, but if you
don't claim I can fix you in three
401
:minutes, in two steps or less, you
know, there are other headlines and
402
:people seem to fall for those headlines.
403
:Uh, at, at least, you know, if you,
if you're just going by the numbers of
404
:views of a video they have hundreds of
thousands of views on this thing that,
405
:you know, it can't be true really for
most people, it, it is discouraging.
406
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: I am sure.
407
:Russell Newton: But it's gotten,
408
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: I'm sure
everyone's offering something.
409
:There's, you want a more mature audience.
410
:Like years ago I did more instant healing
where I used my gift to help people
411
:heal of whatever disease or trauma I.
412
:And what I found was that
people would come back the
413
:next week with something else.
414
:Russell Newton: mm.
415
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: Something
else, and something else.
416
:But it really didn't elevate them.
417
:It didn't elevate them to
be beyond circumstance.
418
:It kept them trying to manufacture a life
of wellbeing without knowing wellbeing.
419
:Right.
420
:And it just is more materialism.
421
:The answer is outside of yourself.
422
:The answer is, and so much
social media, as you know, it
423
:is like, look at my abs, right?
424
:Or look how pretty my house is.
425
:Look, I'm boarding this plane.
426
:Look at my fancy car, and God bless.
427
:You know, I, I like that stuff.
428
:I, I'm not making it wrong.
429
:You know, it is what it is you gotta be.
430
:It doesn't feel authentic
to me to over promise.
431
:And I guess on some level I'm
paying a price because I'm
432
:not capturing those people.
433
:But those people I really don't
wanna work with, to be honest,
434
:Russell Newton: That's exactly right.
435
:That's, that's the most valid
ending to that sentence is that.
436
:What good are the 32nd clicks?
437
:You know, I, we're not here on
social media to the, the goal is
438
:not to build the huge following.
439
:The goal is to help those,
that are willing to put the
440
:work in and, and that are
441
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: who you are.
442
:A match,
443
:Russell Newton: in being improve
whatever the right phrasing might be.
444
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: right?
445
:Like what I ask clients a lot when
I first start working with them is,
446
:what do you, well, what do you want?
447
:Usually I want a boyfriend, I
want money, I want my pancreas
448
:back, whatever the case may be.
449
:Okay, great.
450
:That's a great place to start.
451
:Now what's your life about Now?
452
:That's a very interesting question to me.
453
:What is your life about?
454
:Like if you were to be buried and
you had a little tombstone or a big
455
:tombstone, what do you want it saying?
456
:Not like I'm a father, son, brother,
but here lies Hubert or Christine.
457
:She lived what?
458
:She lived life fully.
459
:She knew love, she knew belonging.
460
:She was evolved.
461
:She always had a con,
what is your life about?
462
:And that will give us the framework
to make decisions moving forward.
463
:But if you don't know what
your life is about, you're
464
:kind of wandering in the dark.
465
:You're just, you're just trying, you're
making it up as you go along and you're
466
:make, and you, you're just like, I'm lost.
467
:What's your life about?
468
:And most people say, I don't know.
469
:And.
470
:I don't know, and that's
when I tune into their soul.
471
:I'm like, have you ever thought Yes,
I think about that all the time.
472
:Okay, there.
473
:There it is.
474
:There it is.
475
:It's right there.
476
:Yeah.
477
:But yeah, there's a lot of reasons.
478
:There's always a lot of reasons of,
of course, there's a lot of reasons.
479
:I'm not saying you don't have evidence.
480
:I'm not saying you don't have
reason to have pause, but is
481
:that really what you want?
482
:Yes.
483
:That's my heartfelt desire.
484
:I don't know how to get there.
485
:Don't worry.
486
:Let's just admit that you want that,
that that's your soul yearning.
487
:Soul meaning from your soul,
and soul, meaning singular.
488
:Russell Newton: Right, right.
489
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: You can
only monotheism has it right?
490
:In some respects, some respects
you can only honor one God.
491
:Not God, Lord, creator one God.
492
:Meaning your life could
only be about one thing.
493
:It is the umbrella.
494
:Now your life might be about love.
495
:Great, let's do that.
496
:It might be life, be about beauty.
497
:Great.
498
:Your might.
499
:Life might be about forgiveness.
500
:Great, but you can't be
about forgiveness and beauty.
501
:'cause those things sometimes compete.
502
:One will rise to the top.
503
:And that's where we
take our direction from.
504
:One can consider that an angel.
505
:And we're taking our direction from
that angel, the angel of whatever it is.
506
:My life per se, is about evolution.
507
:I am really curious, not what
God is, but what this is.
508
:What is this, what is this?
509
:And what is the apex of my evolution?
510
:That's my interest.
511
:And so all decisions followed from there.
512
:My
513
:Russell Newton: Okay.
514
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: not about love.
515
:I like, love my life's.
516
:I like belonging.
517
:I love that too.
518
:I, I, I love, uh, love, uh, sex.
519
:I love altered states of consciousness.
520
:I love all that part of me.
521
:He's up and about.
522
:Uh, good.
523
:Down you go.
524
:Oh, wait, wait, wait.
525
:Whoa.
526
:Okay.
527
:Sorry about that.
528
:What's your life about?
529
:So, I guess I'm asking, you're
inviting your listeners to
530
:consider what's your life about?
531
:What do you want written
on your tombstone?
532
:What do you want said to said
about you at your eulogy?
533
:And then we need to separate
what your spirit is saying
534
:and what your ego is saying.
535
:Well, I want people to tell that
I was a great businessman and that
536
:I, you know, supported it well.
537
:Is that your, your spirit
or is that your ego?
538
:And we need to distinguish those
things and pull them apart.
539
:Russell Newton: Wow.
540
:So that's your first step
541
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: That's
542
:Russell Newton: or a, even
your first step, but a person's
543
:first step to self-realization.
544
:Is that the right phrase?
545
:Or, or, uh, what is
546
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder:
ization is exactly it.
547
:Actually, you did a great job there.
548
:Self-actualization.
549
:Yeah, you did a great job.
550
:Most people don't get that.
551
:Mazel tough to you.
552
:Self-actualization is, I
want to be my best self.
553
:I want the body, the wealth, the whatever.
554
:That's self-actualization.
555
:Best life, best version of self.
556
:Self-actualization.
557
:Self-realization is there's no one here.
558
:There's no one here I
am, I am the everything.
559
:I realize the true self,
that there is no self.
560
:That's self-realization.
561
:I love self-realization all about it and.
562
:People want it, but they're a
little frightened because they
563
:think they have to disintegrate.
564
:Like God is chasing them around with
a broom, like a mouse beating them up.
565
:Right?
566
:That you have to release yourself.
567
:You have to stop being you.
568
:The truth is you become the divine within.
569
:You recognize your divinity within self.
570
:The tech.
571
:If people are looking for, if your
audience is looking for practitioners
572
:and let's say I don't appeal to them,
that's fine, but I will, I wanna give
573
:this tip, which is really important.
574
:I think if you're gonna work
with anyone, coach, hypnotist,
575
:therapist, whatever, healer.
576
:The signs of awakening
577
:is a sense of still the person has a sense
of stillness, meaning there's space in
578
:between their thoughts, there's stillness.
579
:You get more still when
you're around them.
580
:You get less defended stillness.
581
:There's a sense of calm and
there's a sense of embodied
582
:love, calm, stillness, love.
583
:Those are the signs of awakening.
584
:If someone doesn't have
that, they're not there.
585
:Now, there are many stages of
awakening, of enlightenment.
586
:They're not there.
587
:There are many people who are
into spiritual materialism.
588
:Rah, rah, you can have what you want.
589
:Go and get it.
590
:Whatever it is, which is
fine if that's what you want.
591
:That's important work.
592
:Self-actualization is important work,
but it's, it's, it's not the work,
593
:Russell Newton: Okay.
594
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: right?
595
:It's not
596
:Russell Newton: Right.
597
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: Again, wellbeing
requires more than self-development.
598
:It requires something
deeper, someone to go within.
599
:That what or recall goes
600
:Russell Newton: It's just these
are, these are eye-opening.
601
:Yeah.
602
:I, I'm almost, uh, there's, there's
so much to unpack from that that I
603
:almost don't know what, where to go.
604
:Um,
605
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: That's okay.
606
:We can hang out in the unknown.
607
:It's a great place to be.
608
:Honestly.
609
:Russell Newton: I think I now I, I,
I hear you and I think maybe I'm un
610
:a little uncomfortable with that.
611
:My background is very
analytical, very, concrete.
612
:Right.
613
:Uh, I, I a math and science
teacher, a, a computer engineer.
614
:Um, I.
615
:I have, uh, some background in, in
counseling, um, a little bit, but
616
:it's just such a different approach
617
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder:
No, actually it isn't.
618
:So can I just tell you what I just saw?
619
:So may I,
620
:Russell Newton: please.
621
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: so when
you're talking, don't get scared.
622
:It's okay.
623
:So don't.
624
:Russell Newton: yes.
625
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: So when you're
talking about your engineering and your
626
:math, right, there's a place that you
go and you, it's up towards your right.
627
:Maybe you left, 'cause I'm
seeing you reversed up here.
628
:Where you go where you
actually consider options.
629
:Do you know what I'm talking about?
630
:When you're thinking about a
problem and how to resolve it,
631
:you go to this still place,
632
:this place of possibility there.
633
:Right there.
634
:It's right there.
635
:Boom.
636
:That's it.
637
:That's it.
638
:Now I've just got that on steroids.
639
:Right?
640
:But you've
641
:Russell Newton: Wow.
642
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: got it.
643
:And the way to increase it is to put
more attention on it and to rec Well
644
:Colby, I don't know when I'm doing it.
645
:That's okay.
646
:That's okay.
647
:That's okay.
648
:Just be become curious.
649
:Oh, there it is again.
650
:You just accessed it.
651
:'cause I could feel it when you access it.
652
:This is the benefit.
653
:Russell Newton: like, yeah,
it's, it's, you know, the impact.
654
:It's a little scary from my point of view.
655
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: Oh yeah.
656
:Russell Newton: almost like,
and, and you're doing this
657
:over a, great distance somehow.
658
:It, it is fascinating.
659
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder:
It's really creepy, right?
660
:It's crazy.
661
:Like I'll talk to a friend,
662
:Russell Newton: creepy.
663
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: really creepy.
664
:I'll talk to a friend and
like, I'm like, I lost you.
665
:No, I'm right here.
666
:No, no.
667
:You're paying attention to something else.
668
:Oh, how do you do that?
669
:I'm like, I don't know.
670
:I just, I, this is this empathy,
the sensitive thing, which is it.
671
:Look, I wouldn't wish this on anyone.
672
:It's a pain in the ass,
to be honest with you.
673
:It's a pain in the ass and it's
what I got and I work with it.
674
:So here's my point.
675
:There is a place you go when you are
open to possibility and you, you are
676
:there, you're in your body, and you're
also aware of the bridge you showed
677
:me, like a bridge, like this horizon.
678
:You're there now, right?
679
:That's it.
680
:You just start delineating, oh, I'm here.
681
:Oh, and then you start being
able to get there at will.
682
:Oh, I want to get there.
683
:I'm, oh, I don't know what
you, what do I have for dinner?
684
:I don't know.
685
:And off you go, right?
686
:And then you're like, that's it.
687
:Now I just have that kind of in waking
688
:state.
689
:Um, now keep in mind, I wanna warn,
I wanna tell on myself a little bit.
690
:Super easy to develop an ego about this.
691
:And there was a time where I'm
like, look how special I am.
692
:Look what I can do.
693
:Right?
694
:And that's a, you know, one of my teachers
would say, Kolby the paranormal, which
695
:is what we just did, is really great.
696
:But don't get stuck there.
697
:I.
698
:Keep going to the unified field.
699
:Keep going.
700
:These gifts occur and occur
as you move forward, but
701
:don't think it's the end game.
702
:Don't think it's even you.
703
:Keep going to the unified field.
704
:Keep going.
705
:Don't get trapped in being psychic
or being intuitive or like talking
706
:to dead people or keep going.
707
:That's not the point.
708
:It is part of the gift and it's
also, and it's also a distraction.
709
:So yes, you're differently wired than me.
710
:We need every, I'm not an engineer.
711
:I can't do that stuff, right?
712
:We need, we need you on the planet and
you can access the unified field your
713
:purpose in a way that's specific to you.
714
:You don't have to do, don't do it my way.
715
:And one, you can't because, not because
it's so great, because you're not me.
716
:Russell Newton: Right.
717
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: This is
the benefit of dealing with an
718
:intuitive, like I can sense your path.
719
:Other people can only give you
what they did, which is handy,
720
:but you can't get where you want
to go from there, in my opinion.
721
:Russell Newton: Um, one of the things that
722
:really struck me early in our
conversation was you talk about the
723
:ability to stretch out or to withdraw.
724
:Tell me about that in
a regular conversation.
725
:Do you, can you, you said you can
control that or withdraw it or
726
:extend it, and I guess it's two
different things that I'm asking.
727
:Can you draw that back into yourself so
that you can move through interactions
728
:without sensing the things around you?
729
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: Everyone
wants to be seen, right?
730
:We all want to be seen, but very few
people want to be seen through, right?
731
:And what you're describing is, holy
crap, this guy can see through me and
732
:my bullshit and my skeletons, and that
scares the hell outta me when I don't
733
:necessarily want to deal with that.
734
:And I certainly don't
want other people to know.
735
:The only way, there are three things I do.
736
:As a wayfinder, I help dig, dig to the
bottom of a wound and help you release it.
737
:I help you with energetic
practices to modulate your field
738
:to enter greater wellbeing, right?
739
:It's like a hack.
740
:Like, okay, you're not, you're
here but you want to be here.
741
:How do we reconfigure your
field so you feel greater joy
742
:beyond your present capacity?
743
:And three, I help you adjust.
744
:Be aware of your ego and
how it's sabotaging you.
745
:Okay?
746
:What you're describing, the discomfort
is this guy's aware of my ego.
747
:I'm scared.
748
:Reasonable, totally reasonable,
totally reasonable, totally reasonable
749
:for me.
750
:My gift, I can turn on or off.
751
:I.
752
:As I think all gifts should
be able to turn on or off.
753
:If when a client comes to me and
says, look, I can't control my gift.
754
:Dead People are constantly talking to
me and it's getting really inconvenient,
755
:that means you're not in control.
756
:That's a problem, and
you need to gain control.
757
:Okay?
758
:This shouldn't be happening to
you outside of your willingness or
759
:else something else is going on.
760
:That means you might be being influenced
by something or you are, you know, you
761
:have some competing needs or thoughts
and you look, look how special I am.
762
:I'm so spiritual, I can't
control my evolution.
763
:God wants, you know,
some craziness, right?
764
:God bless you.
765
:I've got my own craziness, okay?
766
:So I have control.
767
:I can turn it on or turn it off.
768
:Having said that, if
I'm at the barista, I.
769
:And I'll give you an example.
770
:So I went to the market, I don't
know, a couple years ago, and this,
771
:uh, the cashier says, how are you?
772
:I'm like, I'm not having a great day,
actually, it's really not a good day.
773
:So like, okay, that'll be 1359 now.
774
:I was like, holy crap.
775
:How does she do that?
776
:How does she do that?
777
:Because if someone tells me in those
days they were having a bad day, I
778
:would feel compelled to help them com.
779
:Like I had no choice in the matter.
780
:Like, I have to, but she doesn't
have the empathy that I have.
781
:My empathy keeps me ethical
because I sense the other and what
782
:it will do to the other, and I
sense the other as myself, right?
783
:So people are, without empathy, you
are more, you are more not prone.
784
:You can be more unethical
than somebody who has empathy.
785
:Right.
786
:So to answer your question, I'm
able to turn it on and turn it off.
787
:I make choices like to
engage or not engage.
788
:'cause not every day do I wanna sit
down with somebody because I send
789
:something, you know, maybe I don't
and I have to choose, you know, let's,
790
:there's a practice I have that one
of my other teachers would taught
791
:me, Colby, if there's a lost dog in
the neighborhood, that doesn't mean
792
:it's for you to go and get that dog.
793
:What do you mean it's a lost dog?
794
:It's running around.
795
:It could be starving, it could be abused.
796
:Of course I'm gonna go and save the dog.
797
:No, Colby, you have to
ask, is that yours to do?
798
:Because the boy down the street,
that might be his future pet, and you
799
:stepping in will cause a rift in that
you have to ask, is this mine to do?
800
:If, for instance, like for me, I have
this ability, one to find lost dogs.
801
:Like if you want a dog, you
just tell me what you want.
802
:It'll come within a week.
803
:This boom shows up.
804
:Or if you're an elderly
person lost, you find me.
805
:Always.
806
:I find an old person pretty much
every other day, every third
807
:day, wandering around lost.
808
:Now I live near a, like three
blocks From a senior center.
809
:Yeah.
810
:Okay.
811
:Yeah, yeah.
812
:But it's incr.
813
:I ask other people,
does this happen to you?
814
:Does this happen to you?
815
:No.
816
:Why?
817
:I've never seen five old people lost.
818
:I find them all the time.
819
:So there's, and I ask each
time, is this mine to do?
820
:And the times I'm like, okay, there's an
older man with a cane wandering around.
821
:I get clearly not yours.
822
:I'm like, well, can I stay here and watch?
823
:Not yours.
824
:Walk away.
825
:Walk away, but, but walk away.
826
:The gift has its pluses and the more
tuned in you are to yourself, the more
827
:you know what your is yours to do.
828
:The only thing when you get that like pull
away from me is you're trying to protect
829
:what you don't even wanna protect anymore.
830
:You don't want that self that you're
holding onto that you're embarrassed by.
831
:You're like, look, in my opinion,
832
:life is a perpetual
coming out of the closet,
833
:right?
834
:You just fly your freak flag higher
and higher and higher, because no
835
:one part of me gives a shit anyway.
836
:Russell Newton: That's
prob, that's probably true.
837
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder:
No one gives a shit.
838
:It's you who gives a shit.
839
:Because you think you've taken in their
voices or what you imagine their voices
840
:have said, real or run real, whatever.
841
:Who are you protecting
anyway from your freakiness?
842
:Not Freakiness, criminal.
843
:Freakiness.
844
:Like you being you.
845
:No one cares, cares.
846
:My, uh, I have a transgender
friend and he was really afraid.
847
:She, I apologize.
848
:She is, was really afraid
to wear a dress, right?
849
:And I said to her, no one cares.
850
:In fact, everyone's so involved with
themselves, they may not even notice.
851
:They might not even notice.
852
:And she went out in her dress,
in her thing, felt so free.
853
:No one cared.
854
:Cared.
855
:Hardly.
856
:No one cared.
857
:And.
858
:I don't care.
859
:Do what you're gonna do.
860
:Now I live in Seattle.
861
:Right, right.
862
:It's very rather liberal here.
863
:So you know, I may be speaking
from that paradigm, but your
864
:listeners, please go and be you.
865
:The journey of our lives
is not to be happy.
866
:I'm sorry.
867
:It's not what it's about.
868
:It's not about finding happiness.
869
:That's not what it's about.
870
:Sorry.
871
:Sorry.
872
:It's not what it's about.
873
:The journey of our lifetime
is to become ourselves.
874
:That's the journey is to allow
yourself to become who you are.
875
:Giving yourself permission every
moment, every step of the way
876
:to be you, whoever that may be.
877
:Now that's separating who you think
you are, who you think you need
878
:to be, who you think will get your
approval from who you actually are.
879
:That's the journey and my friend,
that is not always a happy process.
880
:It's deeply satisfying, deeply
satisfying, but it's not happy.
881
:'cause you gotta allow
yourself to become you
882
:and let go of, oh, I need their approval,
I need, I need to make a living.
883
:You know, whatever it is, I
gotta do this, I gotta do that.
884
:Other people, Papa, I have this reason to.
885
:Okay, see you next time.
886
:Enjoy yourself.
887
:Russell Newton: Does that disillusion some
of your clients coming in, do the, does
888
:that turn them away or they realize enough
that, uh, what you're saying is true?
889
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: You
know, you want to be able to
890
:speak the truth with compassion.
891
:Just speaking the truth can
make you sound like an asshole.
892
:I.
893
:Russell Newton: Very
894
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: Right.
895
:So you
896
:Russell Newton: Very
897
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: speak the truth
with compassion and with a sense that
898
:they are getting it and able to digest it.
899
:Having said that, I had a client last
week, new client, she gets on the
900
:phone, she's just starts talking and
I'm like, what do you wanna work on?
901
:She didn't answer the question.
902
:I kept talking about her.
903
:I don't know her cells
and they're in conflict.
904
:I don't know.
905
:And she keeps talking and then she
starts like, oh, this one's this.
906
:And I'm feeling this now.
907
:And I'm like feeling in.
908
:I'm like, there's nothing happening.
909
:She's all in her mind.
910
:There's nothing happening.
911
:She starts to cry.
912
:There's nothing happening.
913
:'cause she's on some sort of
mental trip, which happens, right?
914
:That happens.
915
:'cause she, her mind wants to convince
her that something's happening.
916
:But really nothing is happening.
917
:Another work is getting done.
918
:And so I stop and I'm like, would you
like to know my opinion about you?
919
:She keeps talking.
920
:Russell Newton: Wow.
921
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: She keeps talking.
922
:You're paying for the session.
923
:Would you like to get my feedback?
924
:I'm like, well, stop, stop, stop.
925
:Do I have your attention?
926
:Can I tell you what I sense?
927
:Yes.
928
:Okay, good.
929
:You're not letting me contribute to you
and you don't let anyone contribute to
930
:you because you're too afraid to allow
somebody to love you because your parents
931
:love came with a whole bunch of stuff
and you grew up too fast, and now you
932
:want love, but you can't let it in.
933
:Now she starts crying Now real heaving.
934
:I could sense it in her field.
935
:Stuff is coming, right?
936
:Stuff is coming.
937
:Oh, I've known this, but I, but
you haven't been able to get to it.
938
:Right?
939
:Because we are damaged in
our relationship with people.
940
:That's how we're damaged.
941
:That requires another person
to help you resolve it.
942
:You can't resolve it alone.
943
:Not those kind of wounds.
944
:You can go to Tibet live in a mountain.
945
:You're not gonna touch this.
946
:Okay?
947
:You can touch other stuff, but you
can't touch interpersonal damage.
948
:You can't.
949
:Now, after that whole
series, she feels better.
950
:She feels more open.
951
:Okay.
952
:She gets off, she makes another
appointment, and then she comes to con.
953
:Then I get an email saying she doesn't
wanna work with me because she's
954
:too terrified about what came out.
955
:It's too difficult.
956
:Okay.
957
:Okay.
958
:She's not ready to go
there again, you're scared.
959
:And she may need some time to coalesce
because what happened was she had her
960
:resolution, she felt good, and then
her ego stepped in after the fact
961
:and said, enough of this,
I wanna stay where I am.
962
:It's too scary out there.
963
:And that's true for all of us.
964
:We want what we want, but we would have
it if we didn't have competing desires.
965
:We would.
966
:We, we have a life we'll
allow ourselves to have.
967
:That's just true.
968
:We could say all day.
969
:I had another client last week, a
young lady who wants to be married
970
:in her thirties, can't meet a guy.
971
:Very attractive, very
nice woman, yoga person.
972
:She's talking about how she wants
to be in love and find a man.
973
:And I'm like, well, the reason you can't
find that is 'cause you don't want love.
974
:Do you want to be validated?
975
:What?
976
:You want to be validated?
977
:You don't want love.
978
:You don't wanna give love receiv love.
979
:You want to be validated.
980
:What are you talking about?
981
:You want everyone to know you're okay
because you got this on your arm.
982
:Took her a moment.
983
:She's like, you're right.
984
:Okay, let's work on getting you validated.
985
:Let's work on you, validating you.
986
:Then maybe, maybe love
will show up, maybe not.
987
:It's a very outside in approach, right?
988
:It's very much performative, right?
989
:Again, it's masquerading as
somebody else and afraid that
990
:people will see through it.
991
:Right.
992
:As opposed to, okay, you don't
value you, you're not valid to you.
993
:And by the way, we all
are on that journey.
994
:The only reason I'm able to see
anyone is 'cause I see me that
995
:Russell Newton: Hmm.
996
:Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: I have a gift.
997
:Sure.
998
:But I've applied this gift to myself.
999
:The only reason I could,
we're all not that different.
:
00:51:23,719 --> 00:51:24,619
We're all ice cream.
:
00:51:24,619 --> 00:51:26,299
We're just different flavors of ice cream.
:
00:51:26,809 --> 00:51:27,169
Right?
:
00:51:27,409 --> 00:51:29,779
So, no, I'm not beyond this.
:
00:51:29,779 --> 00:51:30,079
Right.
:
00:51:30,079 --> 00:51:31,309
I'm in it with you.
:
00:51:31,879 --> 00:51:32,359
Okay.
:
00:51:32,359 --> 00:51:35,269
So you want, you need
to validate yourself.
:
00:51:35,599 --> 00:51:36,049
Okay, great.
:
00:51:36,049 --> 00:51:36,769
Let's look at that.
:
00:51:37,189 --> 00:51:37,789
Let's go.
:
00:51:38,467 --> 00:51:39,077
Russell Newton: Fantastic.
:
00:51:39,379 --> 00:51:39,679
Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: Yeah.
:
00:51:39,679 --> 00:51:41,089
Maybe you don't want a val.
:
00:51:41,089 --> 00:51:45,049
You want someone to come in and pick
you up and tell you you're okay.
:
00:51:45,319 --> 00:51:45,949
Me too.
:
00:51:46,009 --> 00:51:46,609
I do too.
:
00:51:46,669 --> 00:51:47,059
I do too.
:
00:51:47,569 --> 00:51:48,379
Is that gonna happen?
:
00:51:48,409 --> 00:51:49,369
Mm, probably not.
:
00:51:49,699 --> 00:51:50,059
Okay.
:
00:51:50,149 --> 00:51:55,249
So let's honor those parts
of you that don't feel valid.
:
00:51:55,879 --> 00:51:56,839
And maybe the guy will come.
:
00:51:56,869 --> 00:51:58,069
Maybe the guy will not come.
:
00:52:00,319 --> 00:52:00,679
Right.
:
00:52:01,609 --> 00:52:03,739
The journey is to become ourselves.
:
00:52:04,279 --> 00:52:06,079
And sometimes we don't like ourselves.
:
00:52:07,637 --> 00:52:08,747
Russell Newton: Wow, that's, yeah.
:
00:52:09,349 --> 00:52:09,739
Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: Right?
:
00:52:10,339 --> 00:52:11,179
And that's okay.
:
00:52:11,689 --> 00:52:12,049
Okay.
:
00:52:12,049 --> 00:52:14,389
Let's allow ourselves to be us.
:
00:52:15,289 --> 00:52:16,459
Oh, well, I'm a bit of a bully.
:
00:52:16,489 --> 00:52:18,319
Okay, let's allow yourself to be a bully.
:
00:52:18,979 --> 00:52:19,969
Let's not judge it.
:
00:52:20,689 --> 00:52:21,799
Allow yourself to be a bully.
:
00:52:21,979 --> 00:52:25,369
'cause you're also a bully to you,
not only to your wife, your kids.
:
00:52:25,519 --> 00:52:26,389
You're also a bully to you.
:
00:52:26,444 --> 00:52:30,379
Let's, let's look at, let's
allow yourself to be a bully.
:
00:52:31,429 --> 00:52:32,479
Oh, I don't wanna be a bully.
:
00:52:33,139 --> 00:52:35,569
Okay, well, okay.
:
00:52:35,569 --> 00:52:36,079
Why not?
:
00:52:36,319 --> 00:52:36,859
Well, 'cause it's wrong.
:
00:52:36,859 --> 00:52:37,429
No, no, no, no.
:
00:52:37,489 --> 00:52:40,579
I want you to allow yourself
to enjoy being a bully.
:
00:52:40,579 --> 00:52:41,179
Go for it.
:
00:52:41,419 --> 00:52:41,899
Enjoy.
:
00:52:41,899 --> 00:52:43,789
Mm, I love it.
:
00:52:43,789 --> 00:52:44,359
I love it.
:
00:52:44,419 --> 00:52:45,409
I love the power.
:
00:52:45,529 --> 00:52:47,599
I love pushing somebody into the ground.
:
00:52:47,689 --> 00:52:48,199
I love it.
:
00:52:48,199 --> 00:52:51,739
I'm, I'm, um, I'm Colby, this
is not so satisfying anymore.
:
00:52:51,799 --> 00:52:53,239
Oh, it's not?
:
00:52:53,239 --> 00:52:54,829
I'm, oh, okay.
:
00:52:55,159 --> 00:52:56,059
What's satisfying?
:
00:52:56,659 --> 00:52:57,165
I don't know.
:
00:52:57,199 --> 00:52:58,159
I don't know what, okay.
:
00:52:58,159 --> 00:52:58,909
Let's hang out there.
:
00:53:00,184 --> 00:53:01,684
It goes very quickly.
:
00:53:01,714 --> 00:53:06,724
Like it's not, therapy is great and I've
had a lot, but it's quick because you're
:
00:53:06,724 --> 00:53:13,504
just allowing someone to unfold while I
stay here, right in my alignment while
:
00:53:13,504 --> 00:53:15,964
I'm holding or helping hold a container.
:
00:53:17,134 --> 00:53:22,724
A container is an energetic structure
supported by angelic forces guides
:
00:53:23,254 --> 00:53:26,074
that makes things go fast, right?
:
00:53:26,074 --> 00:53:30,784
It helps hold, just like you've been in
a container, if you've ever been to a
:
00:53:30,784 --> 00:53:35,974
service of some sort, a funeral, a bar
mitzvah, a wedding, you know, you could
:
00:53:35,974 --> 00:53:39,124
feel when you enter into a sacred place.
:
00:53:39,214 --> 00:53:43,354
That's a container, so I'm hoping
to establish it around somebody.
:
00:53:45,454 --> 00:53:48,282
It goes very, it goes pretty fast, and
:
00:53:48,582 --> 00:53:48,802
Russell Newton: Wow.
:
00:53:49,102 --> 00:53:50,254
Colby Wilk, Wayfinder:
there's also no place to go.
:
00:53:51,364 --> 00:53:52,684
We are here to become ourselves.
:
00:53:52,714 --> 00:53:54,304
That's a never ending process.
:
00:53:55,324 --> 00:53:58,414
I hear people kolby, how
long will it take me to?
:
00:53:59,554 --> 00:54:00,394
Heal this.
:
00:54:01,359 --> 00:54:05,434
I'm, I don't know how, how willing
are you to be with yourself?
:
00:54:07,384 --> 00:54:07,894
I'm willing.
:
00:54:07,924 --> 00:54:08,224
Okay.
:
00:54:08,224 --> 00:54:08,764
Let's go.
:
00:54:09,034 --> 00:54:10,804
Oh, this is, let's go.
:
00:54:11,014 --> 00:54:11,404
Great.
:
00:54:13,114 --> 00:54:17,164
I'm very blessed 'cause I get
to talk to people about what
:
00:54:17,164 --> 00:54:20,134
matters most to them themselves.
:
00:54:21,334 --> 00:54:24,334
I'm very blessed 'cause I get
to have really interesting
:
00:54:24,334 --> 00:54:25,474
conversations with people.
:
00:54:27,964 --> 00:54:28,324
Right.
:
00:54:28,714 --> 00:54:35,434
And sometimes I have to help somebody
because there is a place where people
:
00:54:35,434 --> 00:54:38,494
indulge in their victimization.
:
00:54:39,814 --> 00:54:47,674
Or me, I'm 65, my parents really screwed
me up and they, they indulge in it.
:
00:54:48,454 --> 00:54:52,684
There's a place for tapping, touching
in to the wound, and there's a
:
00:54:52,684 --> 00:54:54,634
place for saying, okay, enough,
:
00:54:56,644 --> 00:54:57,184
enough.
:
00:54:58,129 --> 00:54:59,149
I let this go.
:
00:54:59,359 --> 00:55:00,949
Let's do a process to let it go.
:
00:55:02,149 --> 00:55:04,069
I know so many people.
:
00:55:05,929 --> 00:55:12,649
I had a years ago I had a
call from my sister Love.
:
00:55:12,649 --> 00:55:16,969
My sister, love her, and
she was with my mother.
:
00:55:17,149 --> 00:55:17,869
Here's the accent.
:
00:55:17,869 --> 00:55:24,439
My mother, and she's like, Colby, my
sister said, when did you get rags?
:
00:55:24,439 --> 00:55:25,489
My dog from?
:
00:55:26,809 --> 00:55:28,099
I'm like, I got him in eighth grade.
:
00:55:28,099 --> 00:55:28,639
Tell mom.
:
00:55:28,699 --> 00:55:30,259
Tell mommy you got him in eighth grade.
:
00:55:30,619 --> 00:55:32,389
Pam, what's going on?
:
00:55:36,829 --> 00:55:38,569
Mommy thinks you got him in ninth grade.
:
00:55:38,569 --> 00:55:39,559
You got him in eighth grade.
:
00:55:40,999 --> 00:55:43,009
Why are you arguing
with the old woman, Pam?
:
00:55:43,639 --> 00:55:44,989
Let her have what she wants.
:
00:55:46,489 --> 00:55:47,599
Let her have what she wants.
:
00:55:47,869 --> 00:55:48,589
Why are you arguing?
:
00:55:48,589 --> 00:55:49,939
Why your sister is arguing with my mother?
:
00:55:49,969 --> 00:55:51,259
'cause she hasn't forgiven my mother.
:
00:55:51,769 --> 00:55:52,189
That's why.
:
00:55:53,929 --> 00:55:54,604
I don't care.
:
00:55:54,604 --> 00:55:56,254
Like, let her believe what she wants.
:
00:55:56,614 --> 00:55:57,634
Who cares?
:
00:56:00,274 --> 00:56:01,204
That's indulging.
:
00:56:02,704 --> 00:56:03,329
Just let it go.
:
00:56:04,659 --> 00:56:05,096
Let it go.
:
00:56:06,904 --> 00:56:07,474
Let it go.
:
00:56:07,744 --> 00:56:08,764
Forgive her, forgive you.
:
00:56:09,364 --> 00:56:13,204
And that process, it's not, when
people don't, I say, let go.
:
00:56:13,474 --> 00:56:16,144
But letting go is not
something that you decide.
:
00:56:16,144 --> 00:56:18,544
You decide to let go, and then
something moves through you.
:
00:56:19,624 --> 00:56:24,604
It's something happens,
you, it's like, Hey, relax.
:
00:56:24,754 --> 00:56:26,194
I can't, that's not helpful.
:
00:56:26,914 --> 00:56:27,664
That's not how, how?
:
00:56:27,664 --> 00:56:28,414
How do I relax?
:
00:56:28,444 --> 00:56:28,714
I don't.
:
00:56:29,164 --> 00:56:31,264
Okay, can, let's calm your breathing.
:
00:56:31,264 --> 00:56:32,674
Breathe in, breathe out.
:
00:56:32,674 --> 00:56:33,484
Bring your attention here.
:
00:56:33,724 --> 00:56:34,744
There's a process.
:
00:56:35,074 --> 00:56:36,364
There's a process to letting go.
:
00:56:39,167 --> 00:56:39,587
Russell Newton: Wow.
:
00:56:40,504 --> 00:56:44,674
Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: Everyone
wants change in their life, bigger
:
00:56:44,674 --> 00:56:47,254
house, better body, whatever.
:
00:56:47,764 --> 00:56:49,984
But few people are willing to change.
:
00:56:52,174 --> 00:56:53,194
That's just true.
:
00:56:55,744 --> 00:57:01,954
Most of my work, to be honest with
you, is I have this theory of tides.
:
00:57:02,284 --> 00:57:09,034
It's not my own, but I labeled that, that
we're all in the notion of consciousness.
:
00:57:09,754 --> 00:57:12,214
And at any one point
we're caught in a tide.
:
00:57:13,024 --> 00:57:16,804
And if you've ever been to the ocean, I'm
from Long Island, and you get caught in
:
00:57:16,804 --> 00:57:21,064
a tide, you don't try to swim out because
you're just gonna tire yourself out.
:
00:57:21,334 --> 00:57:25,054
You tread water, keep your eye on the
horizon so you know how far out you're
:
00:57:25,054 --> 00:57:29,524
going, and you wait for the tide to
spit you out, and then you swim out.
:
00:57:30,364 --> 00:57:33,964
Most of us who are going through a
difficult time are caught in a tide.
:
00:57:35,464 --> 00:57:38,824
You try to swim against the
tide, you are going to suffer.
:
00:57:39,844 --> 00:57:41,104
It's going to drag on.
:
00:57:41,374 --> 00:57:42,574
You cannot fight it.
:
00:57:44,824 --> 00:57:49,024
However you tread water with
somebody, you keep your eye
:
00:57:49,024 --> 00:57:50,764
on what you want, the horizon.
:
00:57:51,334 --> 00:57:54,934
You see how far you're getting
from the horizon, how far you are
:
00:57:54,934 --> 00:57:55,985
getting from the source of you.
:
00:57:58,114 --> 00:58:00,814
You'll survive the tide
until it spits you out.
:
00:58:01,864 --> 00:58:05,314
Most of us just need a
partner to get through,
:
00:58:07,744 --> 00:58:11,374
and while you're being pressured
by the tide, your stuff is coming
:
00:58:11,374 --> 00:58:13,474
up to be resolved, to be washed.
:
00:58:14,824 --> 00:58:20,644
So when you emerge out of the tide,
you're no longer the same self, and
:
00:58:20,644 --> 00:58:27,004
you get out, you shake yourself off and
you're fresh and ready for something new.
:
00:58:27,932 --> 00:58:28,262
Russell Newton: Wow.
:
00:58:28,684 --> 00:58:31,652
Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: Maybe there's some
fried chicken that sounds really good.
:
00:58:31,952 --> 00:58:32,342
Russell Newton: That sounds
:
00:58:32,584 --> 00:58:33,124
Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: The peach.
:
00:58:34,172 --> 00:58:34,922
Russell Newton: That sounds good.
:
00:58:35,642 --> 00:58:36,512
that's fantastic.
:
00:58:36,512 --> 00:58:39,842
I, that's a, that's a great conclusion.
:
00:58:39,932 --> 00:58:42,932
We're about, we've been going
quite a while, and I don't, I
:
00:58:42,962 --> 00:58:44,252
really appreciate your time.
:
00:58:44,552 --> 00:58:51,212
Um, I, I've got so much in my head from
this that I am, I need to come to an end
:
00:58:51,212 --> 00:58:53,432
because I am, am having trouble processing
:
00:58:53,524 --> 00:58:53,814
Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: Okay.
:
00:58:53,972 --> 00:58:54,842
Russell Newton: a lot of this stuff
:
00:58:54,844 --> 00:58:55,134
Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: Yeah.
:
00:58:55,622 --> 00:58:58,682
Russell Newton: and the thoughts
are getting a bit jumbled.
:
00:58:58,922 --> 00:59:04,772
Um, so let's wrap it up with
some business, uh, side of things
:
00:59:04,772 --> 00:59:05,882
for our listeners and then.
:
00:59:06,302 --> 00:59:09,182
Uh, maybe we can do it again
at some point in the future.
:
00:59:09,542 --> 00:59:15,722
If, uh, if the listener wants to
get in touch with you, uh, or they
:
00:59:15,722 --> 00:59:18,002
want to contact you, what would
you recommend for them to do?
:
00:59:18,002 --> 00:59:18,512
What's the best
:
00:59:18,529 --> 00:59:22,129
Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: So, uh,
my website is colby wilk.com,
:
00:59:22,129 --> 00:59:25,189
C-O-L-B-Y-W-I-L k.com.
:
00:59:25,819 --> 00:59:28,219
And I have a newsletter there.
:
00:59:28,759 --> 00:59:33,769
And I've got a ton of blog articles
and tips and practices as well as
:
00:59:33,769 --> 00:59:37,969
I'm on most of the social media,
mostly on Facebook and on YouTube.
:
00:59:38,839 --> 00:59:45,169
And, uh, I sent you a link for a free
gift, uh, which is, uh, helping people to
:
00:59:45,169 --> 00:59:48,709
find the first secret to finding your way.
:
00:59:50,149 --> 00:59:53,839
It's really great and it's free
right, and it helps people to
:
00:59:53,839 --> 00:59:57,229
understand what may be in their way
:
00:59:58,017 --> 00:59:58,307
Russell Newton: okay.
:
00:59:58,607 --> 01:00:01,549
Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: causing them
to feel lost, forgotten, stuck.
:
01:00:02,107 --> 01:00:06,787
Russell Newton: is there something
you wished I had asked I didn't?
:
01:00:06,877 --> 01:00:10,447
Is there some information you want
to provide, uh, as a, as a closing
:
01:00:10,447 --> 01:00:13,447
note that I should have broached the
subject on and I, I missed completely.
:
01:00:18,759 --> 01:00:21,459
Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: the only
thing I'd like to say, there's a
:
01:00:21,459 --> 01:00:23,139
lot of stuff going on in the world.
:
01:00:24,159 --> 01:00:28,209
There's a lot of conflict, a
lot of argument, a lot of doubt.
:
01:00:29,769 --> 01:00:32,559
Doubt is the food of the ego.
:
01:00:33,639 --> 01:00:38,349
Once your ego gets involved, you
get scared, and then you do dec.
:
01:00:38,529 --> 01:00:40,419
You make your decisions based on fear.
:
01:00:42,339 --> 01:00:49,239
The reason, the opportunity here
with all this conflict with grocery
:
01:00:49,239 --> 01:00:53,979
store shells being empty with
people unsure about their living
:
01:00:56,019 --> 01:00:57,444
is to not give into doubt.
:
01:00:59,634 --> 01:01:01,434
To know that all will be okay.
:
01:01:01,524 --> 01:01:02,874
We don't know what it's gonna look like.
:
01:01:03,894 --> 01:01:05,394
You may be moved to a different job.
:
01:01:06,114 --> 01:01:10,584
You may be compelled to move
to a smaller, more affordable
:
01:01:10,584 --> 01:01:13,224
home, but all will be okay.
:
01:01:14,454 --> 01:01:17,394
'cause what we value is
not really what we value.
:
01:01:19,884 --> 01:01:20,934
All will be fine.
:
01:01:21,054 --> 01:01:22,464
Do not give into fear.
:
01:01:23,184 --> 01:01:25,224
Turn off the news more and more.
:
01:01:25,524 --> 01:01:26,874
Don't stick your head in the sand.
:
01:01:27,587 --> 01:01:27,937
Russell Newton: Right.
:
01:01:28,494 --> 01:01:31,614
Colby Wilk, Wayfinder: Don't be
afraid and don't give into paranoia.
:
01:01:33,384 --> 01:01:38,244
There are forces supporting our planet
to go through this change and there are
:
01:01:38,244 --> 01:01:43,164
forces that are against that process.
:
01:01:43,974 --> 01:01:48,234
Do not feed them and you feed them
by feeding your ego with doubt.
:
01:01:50,214 --> 01:01:50,814
Stay short.
:
01:01:53,124 --> 01:01:53,154
Okay.
:
01:01:53,727 --> 01:01:54,337
Russell Newton: Fantastic.
:
01:01:55,837 --> 01:01:56,057
Col.
:
01:01:56,057 --> 01:01:56,857
Thank you very much.
:
01:01:56,979 --> 01:01:57,609
Colby Wilk, Wayfinder:
Oh, it's my pleasure.
:
01:01:57,609 --> 01:01:58,234
I had a wonderful time.