Is a hidden epidemic of perfectionism creating stress and anxiety? How can we escape the perfection trap in a world of curated experiences?

Episode Sources:
https://www.newscientist.com/article/mg24332430-600-the-misunderstood-personality-trait-that-is-causing-anxiety-and-stress/
https://www.apa.org/pubs/journals/releases/bul-bul0000138.pdf

Episode Excerpt:

We keep hearing about ideas like the perfection trap. But is it real? Does the perfection trap exist?
That’s probably the hardest question of today’s show.
Because it’s totally subjective.
Certainly - and I don’t think it’s the first time we’ve discussed this subject this year
We are seeing an increase in the numbers of people with mental health issues.
Particularly people in the generations we define as millennial and digital native.
And while perfectionism isn’t generally accepted as an illness in and of itself,
It has been closely linked to eating disorders, OCD, anxiety and depression.
It does seem that people with those conditions are more likely to demonstrate perfectionist traits than you would expect to see in the general population.

So what are we actually talking about? How are we framing or defining perfectionism?
Perfectionism is hard to define in a clinical sense.
And there doesn’t seem to be a clear consensus among psychologists as to its definitions although many are starting to become alarmed about the potential mental health timebomb that might be ticking away in the next generation.
The closest they have come to a consensus on this issue is the 30 year old multidimensional Perfection Scale which grades participants for a series of 45 questions on a level of 1 to 7.
And there is more than one type of perfectionism.

Which are?
There are self-oriented perfectionists.
These are the people who set themselves ridiculously high goals and then feel miserable when they can’t achieve them.

Like you?
You’re saying it as a joke but it’s probably a fair assessment tbh.
I left one line of work behind me because it was something that left a lot to chance.
Even when things were at their most successful, there were always failures.
And I found that very hard to cope with. I couldn’t take pleasure in the success because I only saw the failures.

Then there are are Other-Oriented perfectionists…
Who hold others to ridiculously high standards.

Which sounds like you again…
And explains why I don’t have staff anymore and work largely alone.
Not because I ‘can’t find anyone good enough’ which is what you often hear from entrepreneurs who suffer from the same delusions as me.
But because it’s simply unfair on the people who are doing a great job that you are unable to comprehend.

And the final one: socially prescribed perfectionists?
This is where perfectionism dovetails with our own set of interests.
These are the people who feel an overwhelming pressure from others.
That might be from bosses or colleagues, friends or family members.
And, increasingly, it’s rooted in the digital sphere.
Not just in social media, but in the way we communicate.
And that many of those communications are shorn of context.