“Always be yourself” is often offered as reassuring advice, but it rarely stands up to closer examination.

In this episode, Julia explores why the idea of a single, stable “true self” creates more pressure than clarity. Using Batman as an unexpectedly useful psychodynamic example, she looks at how many of the selves we live with are adaptations that once helped us survive, rather than expressions of authenticity. The episode considers why phrases like “be yourself” and “bring your whole self to work” can feel subtly coercive, how boundaries support psychological safety, why the word authentic has lost its usefulness, and what clients are often really saying when they feel disconnected from who they are. This is not a confidence issue, but a developmental story, and an invitation to greater understanding and choice.

Here are the highlights for this episode:

(2.07) Shark repellent bat spray

(2.49) Batman as a highly organised response to an early trauma

(6.45) The overuse of “authentic”

(8.07) What’s more helpful than ‘be yourself’

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ABOUT THE PODCAST

The Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.

If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.

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