In this episode of Small Town, Big God, host Mikel Collins dives into part two of the Hope Network story. He interviews Jessalyn Ramsey, a participant in the Hope Network’s recovery program. Jessalyn shares her tumultuous past, her experiences with multiple recovery centers, and how she finally found stability and hope with Hope Network. The discussion covers Jessalyn’s struggles, the critical role of a supportive community, and her renewed faith, culminating in her current progress and aspirations. Jessalyn’s narrative underscores the importance of faith-based recovery and the collective effort needed to overcome addiction.

00:00 Introduction to Small Town, Big God

00:29 Meet Jessalyn Ramsey

01:19 Jessalyn's Journey Through Recovery

02:30 The Turning Point

04:56 Life at Hope Network

06:32 Faith and Recovery

08:59 The Role of Community and Support

11:15 Jessalyn's Relationship with Christ

17:04 Overcoming Addiction with Faith

18:36 The Impact of Hope Network

22:28 Final Thoughts and Message to Rutherford County

Hope Network: https://www.hopenetwork.net/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HopeNetworkRC

find more of Mikel's work: https://www.mwcollins.org/

Welcome to Small Town, Big God.

My name is Michael Collins, and I am here to share a story of God working

in Rutherford County, North Carolina.

If you didn't notice, this is part two of the Hope Network story, so I

highly recommend you go listen to part one if you have not done that already.

In part one, I interviewed Ashley Nichols, who's the executive

director of Hope Network.

We talked about how Hope Network came to be and exactly how their program works.

But in this episode, we're going to hear from Jessalyn Ramsey, who's

currently just over halfway through Hope Network's recovery program.

We're going to hear a little bit about Jessalyn's past, her

experience in Hope Network and why she feels that Hope Network is a

benefit to small town friendly.

So without further ado, here is Jessalyn.

So, I was born in Rutherford County, but I've been living here since, I

guess I've been back here since I was 21.

so I'm 25 now, so about to be 26.

So it's been about five years.

I was living in Asheville, but I've bounced back and forth, so from like

Haywood County, Waynesville, I dunno if you know where like Waynesville,

I've been Maggie Valley and all that.

And then, Asheville, Buncombe County, everywhere in Buncombe

County and then, to here, so.

Okay.

Yeah.

Over the past several years, Jessalyn has moved around quite a bit.

Not just from one county to another, but also from one recovery center to another.

Yeah, the first time I went to treatment, I was 18

and I was in South Florida.

I don't know if you ever heard of like South Florida recovery.

They call it like the South Florida

Shuffle.

Yeah.

It's apparently like the

Yeah.

It's apparently like the recovery capital of, I don't think the world's, but it's

apparently pretty big.

So yeah, that was the beginning.

And then since then, I think I've been in four residential treatments, and then

I've been in a bunch of halfway houses.

I guess you would consider this like a sober living transitional.

So kind of like that's what I mean by a halfway house.

And then, in and out of detox probably seven

times.

times.

Is this the longest program you've been a part of?

Yeah.

Yeah.

The long and the longest amount of sobriety I've ever had.

So that's just a blessing in itself.

I kept getting it like three months and then I would struggle again.

I was over at another ministry and then I would go to detox.

I was just back and forth.

something wasn't working.

I needed a change.

a different environment.

I needed something.

So I was coming from a relapse and I was hospitalized and I actually

had a girl reach out to me who was over there cause I was like, look,

I gotta, I gotta go somewhere.

Like I gotta be somewhere.

And I can't keep doing this.

I don't really have anywhere else to go unless I just want to go

back to the streets or go back to wherever I was staying before.

And I, contacted her and she, was like, okay, well, if you really want

to make a difference, like, if you're ready, if you're not just saying you're

ready to get sober for a couple days or whatever, like, you can come here.

So yeah, I don't know.

I think I was just really ready for that change at that point.

I really knew I needed to settle down somewhere and actually stay

clean and be somewhere where I had a safe space for a long period of

time to really get back on my feet.

at that point, I want to say, what was I 24?

Yeah.

I was 24 And I had like acquired probably three months of sobriety.

So after six years of bouncing back and forth, being in and out

of recovery centers, Jesalyn was ready to commit to a longer stay

and make a radical life change.

And she, and she just happened to know some of the women over at Hope Network who

could help her get in contact with Ashley.

you get involved?

I mean, what, how did you have you heard of Out of the Ashes before?

I was over there, they've helped me so much throughout

my sobriety journey as well.

so I knew of the girls, some of the girls had came, um, to like the

meeting that they have over there and then I came to Recovery Road a

couple of times when they were still having it in the basement over here.

So, I knew it was around.

I wasn't really sure of all the support and the help that they had to offer.

But, yeah, that's when I first had heard about it when I came over to

the meeting over here and I saw how many girls they had over at the house.

And everything that they were doing end up?

I had had a relapse, and I needed something different.

I needed, to be surrounded just by women.

I needed more of a home environment, I almost could feel God calling me towards

Hope Network because I'd known some of the girls who had been in and out of

the program as well, I reached out to one of the girls who was at the house.

And then, from that point they were like, okay, we'll call Ashley.

I, called Ashley one day, and April was with her, and they got me in, so,

yeah.

Sometimes, all it takes is one phone call.

Jesselyn joined Hope Network, and the day that we recorded this had just begun

phase two of the Hope Network program.

I actually just got a certificate last night.

It was super cute.

They presented me

with like, had completed phase one.

how different does phase two seem to be from phase one?

I've just been working a lot.

And, I think there's some new things I'm going to try to incorporate

such as, different responsibilities.

starting to prepare mentally for getting my own place.

other than that, pretty much the same as phase one from the first

month when I first got there to not working and, everything.

the curfew is the same, still the same meetings for the most part.

I'm not in as much meetings as I was as some of the other girls like salt

anymore because I completed those.

So I'm not really doing step work anymore, completed that, which is just,

it's a good feeling to have all that

completed.

So, that's really the main, the main difference.

are you going to be moving out during phase two or?

No, not

don't know yet.

Yeah.

My original goal was six months and then, because that's like the

main, that's what they tell you when you come in, there's always an

extension.

Yeah.

I got the extension.

And, I don't see why I couldn't just stay the full year.

I don't see why it wouldn't be beneficial just to wait on God

and try not to rush things.

Things are going really well right now,

Yeah, I think I'll probably just stay year.

Recovery is tough.

It takes a lot of effort, and it's not something I have ever heard of

someone coming through on their own.

Hope Network and ministries like it are so important, because without

them, it would be nearly impossible for people to come out of addiction.

As someone who's been to several different recovery centers, Jessalyn has

a unique perspective on which aspects of Hope Network are the most beneficial

for her and other women in recovery.

Definitely my relationship with God being the top one.

And I think also, Just the girls that God has surrounded me with while being there,

the fellowship over there is amazing.

there's definitely favor over that house when it comes to who

comes in and out of that house.

I mean, there's always going to be times where it's rough and, you know,

people here and there, they'll be coming in and out, there's different

personalities we clash, but at the end of the day, like, I've made some

of the most meaningful relationships I think I've ever had over there.

So, that would be the relationship with God and the relationship with

a girl is definitely the top two.

And then, also I just think the support, I've tried a lot of

new things since being there.

I started school back, and I've wanted to do that for years.

I mean, I've been graduated since I was 17, so 2016.

I've been saying I'm going to do that for years, of course, like relapses happen.

I wasn't in sobriety, different life consequences, circumstances happened.

And then I finally got to a place here where I was like, okay, like I have

the support people were supporting me.

You're like, you can sign up for school.

I work at Chick fil A and they like have this great program that literally

is paying for me to go to school.

Like that's just been so amazing to me.

And before that, it was so hard for me for some reason by myself to.

Even feel like I had the worth to like sign up for school.

I know that sounds crazy.

Like, it seems like something is so simple that most people are like, okay,

we're just gonna apply for school.

Like for me, that was a huge milestone that like I could not cross.

I want to stop and highlight what Jesselyn just said, because I think it's

important and I don't want you to miss it.

So let me play it again.

it was so hard for me for some reason by myself to.

Even feel like I had the worth to like sign up for school.

She didn't feel like she was worth signing up for school.

So many people are held back by the lie that they are not worth taking care of.

Let me tell you something.

You were made in the image of God.

He loves you regardless of what you've done, regardless of what you

are going through, and regardless of what you believe about yourself.

Don't believe the lie that you're not worthy of care.

And if you can, find a network of people who will help support you.

the support that I've had over there, just the encouragement that

someone's just like sat down with me.

I'm like, okay, we're gonna get this FAFSA done.

Like we're gonna make sure this happens for you.

And, gave me a safe place to do my schoolwork as well.

Also held me accountable.

The accountability over there is huge.

Accountability.

I thrive in structure.

And, which is, it's so funny too because it's like when you think

of addiction, you're like you don't want to be told what to do

or you don't want to have rules.

And then when you get sober, it's the complete opposite, like you

need, you have to have the rules.

You have to have the discipline and, the accountability over there is amazing.

I need a curfew.

I need to be told, I'm going to clean my room, but it's still good to know.

I need to do that every single day.

You know, it's just little stuff like that, that rewires your brain that,

is so important for a success at

recovering.

The structure and rules are there for good reason, and you just

heard Jessalyn talking about how beneficial the structure is.

But it also takes some adjusting to come in as an adult and

follow someone else's rules.

it is, hard sometimes giving up your freedom.

To an extent like that.

I think when you come in somewhere so broken though, and you're like, I don't

even want to save that life anymore.

you're a little bit more accepting of it.

And you're kind of like, okay, I'm going to trust these people

that they know what's best for me.

and following those, I mean, some days like, yeah, it sucks.

I'm like, dang, I kind of just wish I could just do whatever and go wherever.

But again, that's just like addiction kicking in like myself will.

So, Yeah, I mean, it's definitely an adjustment and it's weird.

It's not normal for a bunch of girls just to randomly live together

as adults to have all these roles and that's just not normal at 25

or wherever you're at, you know?

But um, I don't know, for me it wasn't too much of an adjustment.

I kind of knew what to expect when I was going in there.

Has b and that, they tell you like when you, when You get in there, there's

like a set of rules and guidelines kinda, they suit you up for all

that, you know, what you're walking

should

jessalyn has been through a lot.

She's had a long road to get where she is.

And I think she would agree that she wouldn't be where she is today if she

didn't have a relationship with Christ.

When did you come to know Christ?

When

um, were you?

So, I was raised in church, which

is a blessing for sure.

I was definitely one of those kids who strayed away from God.

I strayed away really hard, probably in my pre-teens, early teens.

I always knew of him and I was always accepting When people talked about him.

I would just hear people out.

I never was like, Oh, I was like, Oh, okay.

Like I know God, even though at the time I did not know God.

I didn't have a relationship with God whatsoever.

I really did not come back to knowing Christ or rededicating my life.

So I was probably, I wanna say I was 22.

Okay.

Was that at one of these

Yeah.

it's actually really funny how it happened.

I ended up, I was in a detox and I was just, at that point

I was accepting to go anywhere.

And, my mom had found this place in Boone and, it was called,

I forgot what it was called.

it

was something, the farm or something.

And she was like, okay, but like, it's faith based.

I need you to know that.

And I was like, I don't care.

I'll go.

just send me there.

I have nowhere to go.

I need help, you know?

know.

It was, it was, there wasn't a lot of girls there.

It was just a couple girls, which I feel like did make it more

personal and more like intimate that I got to know God again.

And there was a really, really amazing mentor there.

this guy would take us through the Bible and the church that we went to.

And I remember I would just, I just sat and listened to it.

Like I didn't really take it very seriously the first couple weeks.

and like I didn't have my phone.

We were out in the middle of nowhere.

We were like working at a thrift shop all day.

This is, that's all I had was like God 24 7 and I remember cause I wasn't, I

wasn't praying like again, I was listening to what they were saying, but I wasn't

really, I was like, Oh, this isn't for me.

What are you saying?

And I don't know if I was just so full of shame and whatever that I just

wasn't really accepting to hearing it or applying it personally to myself.

And I remember when we went to church one morning and This song, it's a Hill

song, song, and it's called Lead Me to the Cross, and my dad used to play that.

My dad's very musically inclined, and like, when we were younger,

he, played on the worship team.

He, was in kid's church, and, he, would always play that song.

And I remember, you know that feeling when you just, hear a song that

you haven't heard in a long time?

I was just filled with chills almost, and I just broke down at church, because

I'd been going to this church for weeks, and I hadn't heard one song that I knew,

9 the whole time I was there, they were showing me different Christian music.

I was like, dang, this is kind of an old song for them to play, and I

remembered every single word, and I just remember getting chills, and it

was just this feeling that I got, and ever since then, I was like, okay, I'm

gonna try to seek this out again, and

I don't know, let God take a chance at helping me get sober.

Cause I tried other things, I tried NAAA, I tried so many other things.

Rehabs, 12 step programs, but there was never one time during those that I was

like, Okay, I'm gonna go back to the only higher power that I was raised to know.

And so yeah, that's, that's when I was reintroduced, I guess, or when

I fully, tried to come back to God again, I had relapses after that.

And I don't think I was fully surrendered.

So, yeah, I think now it's been a lot different this time.

it was beautiful that that happened to me.

At that treatment center because I know God was always with me But

it's just it made it harder to go out and use every single time.

My relapses were shorter every single time Not saying that it was worse.

But have you ever heard of there's a scripture it like talks about

when you clean up your house and You like go back out or something

or you don't Maintain that house.

butchering it right now and it says like seven demons like come back in or

something You know i'm talking about That's almost what it felt like for me

Like every time I relapsed after coming in coming to get closer to god again.

It's like you were under like there's spiritual warfare added

yeah, plus I knew the truth.

Interesting but your, your time in addiction after that

was getting shorter, but, but

more difficult.

hmm.

Interesting.

The verse that Jalyn and I were struggling to remember was Matthew chapter 12

verses 43 through 45, which says when the unclean spirit has gone out of a

person, it passes through waterless places seeking rest, but finds none.

Then it says, I will return to my house from which I came.

And when it comes, it finds the house empty, swept, and put in order.

Then it goes and brings with it seven other spirits more evil than itself,

and they enter and dwell there.

And the last state of that person is worse than the first.

So it will be with this evil generation.

This is Jesus talking to the Pharisees about how they've

rejected him and his teaching.

But it makes sense that Jessalyn would relate to this scripture.

After she came back to Christ, there was an entirely new

conflict between her flesh and the Holy Spirit living inside her.

If you're not a Christian, this might seem strange to you, but when

we accept Christ as the Lord of our lives, He changes us from the inside.

It doesn't mean that we never mess up, just as Jessalyn fell back into addiction

after she rededicated her life to Christ.

But the sin that we used to love no longer feels good the way it used to.

Because it's no longer in our nature to sin.

Our sin nature is dead, and it's been replaced with the righteousness of Christ.

And we are compelled to live according to our nature.

The new nature continued to help Jessalyn overcome addiction, and

helped her see all of the reasons she had for leaving it behind.

there's been cases where I had gotten in trouble.

I'd gone to jail and I was like, okay, I can't do this anymore.

And you know, I'd gotten out of jail.

I was on probation, whatever.

I had charges.

where there was a fear of not wanting to get locked up, or there

was a fear of times where I was homeless, I was sleeping in my car

and not knowing where I'm gonna go.

there is a fear, so my drug of choice, is killing a lot of people,

and there was a fear of I'm gonna die, and I was overdosing a lot.

there was that fear, and then, it came to a point, where I was like,

I'm gonna die every single time.

And this is not how I want to die.

This is not, I was made for so much more than this.

I think God was showing me that every single time.

Whether it was surviving an overdose, or, Surviving, the

trauma that comes from that.

the trauma from watching people not make it, and You make it.

It's almost like why, why me?

And then it's almost just wanting to make, I know, there was a time where I just

really wanted to make my family proud.

not even as proud, but I didn't want to let them down anymore.

And there was a lot of times where I tried to get sober for

them and then, which never works.

You can't just, you can try to get sober for so many people.

It's not going to work.

And then I guess eventually just got to a point where I got sober for myself

And I was like I want more for myself.

I Again was created so much for so much more than this and I don't know

what that is and I don't feel Like I was created for much more but I

know and god tells me that I am so

Jessalyn had plenty of reasons to get sober, and she'd been a part of so many

different recovery programs that it left me wondering, what was different about

Hope Network compared to these other programs that she had been a part of?

that you've been to Um, the community's like I said before, I was

in like 12 step programs or NA there was always recovery where I was, but not a

lot of people talk about God, they talk about a higher power, but you don't

really put a name to your higher power.

They call it just your higher power and whatever works for you works

for you is how that goes at most

places

Well, in

Yeah.

Well in the 12 steps, yes.

That's mentioned like three times and probably more than that.

I haven't looked at them in a while.

But yeah, refers to like God of your understanding.

Yeah, I mean there's a

spiritual

yeah, so I mean all of all of them.

I mean there's a spiritual part to it.

But there's so many different places where you go that it's like that's that's

what they use and probably the main difference is that god is incorporated

in Everything that we do really like our bible studies going to church.

wanting to reflect actions of, of Jesus and and that's, that's

so important to me right now.

So, it's really amazing to be with other women who that's their goal too.

especially like, I mean there's so many days where, I'm not gonna lie,

like I struggle with my faith and where just feel like people hold on to me

when my faith is like lost that day.

And that, that really helps, like, when somebody just puts me in check that day.

Or like, the girl in the next room is playing worship music and

I really, like, I really needed to hear it that day, you know?

Or, I think that's just little things like that where you can just see God

and everybody there and everything.

Again, I can see God in pretty much everybody,

It's just, there's a piece there that I've never had in another house before.

Again, I feel like I'm supposed to be there as well.

And I think that Adds on to it as well where it's like god

directed me kind of towards there.

But yeah, I would say that's like the main difference Also, like the resources

are so amazing there that they help us with so, the rides first of all, that's

incredible I'm, just gonna throw that out there that helps a lot I was in

asheville one time And the bus system there is a whole different level,

like that's a whole different story.

Okay, so that's a really good perk to have over there.

and then, just when the girls come in, like there's so many different things.

I mean, like some of us are on probation.

don't have a license.

I was blessed.

Thank God I had my license still.

and then, kind of having that accountability to get a job and then

having the transportation to a job.

Because that's really a lot.

When you come out of addiction and you're trying to get a job, it's a lot just to

get to work and to even try to find a job.

That's a lot that I don't think people talk about enough.

if you're a felon, if you have some things pending or some things going

on, I don't know what they say, everywhere's hiring, but it's pretty hard.

And especially if you don't have transportation to get back and forth to

work, that's just a whole nother ballgame.

So, that was super amazing to me when I got there.

And not that they make it to the point where it's so easy on us but it's

to a point where it's so helpful.

It's really helpful and, you have the support right there for you.

You have somebody at the house helping you if you need it.

it's just been really, really an amazing experience for me so far I mean, if

you're a woman and you're struggling with addiction or, reach out, you know.

Sometimes it's really scary to feel like you can trust people,

especially just in a program that you don't know anything about or, um.

I don't know, God's there and it's trustworthy and, um,

yeah, it's, it's so worth it.

It's really worth it.

and, uh, I don't know, I've seen so many women go through really beautiful changes

and through such a beautiful process

. Now, we're almost finished with this episode, but there's one more thing

that I want to highlight, and that's the fact that Jessalyn's recovery

process has been a blessing not just for her, but for her parents as well.

I'm close with my dad and I am,

I'm close with my mom now.

my parents are divorced, and I have a stepdad it hasn't always been

like that, it's getting better.

God's definitely restoring our relationships.

it's been kind of a struggle as well, I think it's definitely

helping it now that I'm sober.

thankfully my parents are both believers.

that really helps out as well.

we're both just kind of going through the process together

of healing our relationship.

I had a great childhood, my dad raised me, so I'll always be

close to my dad no matter what.

he's, my everything.

but they support me a hundred percent.

addiction does run in my family, so it's hard because I'm trying to heal and I

feel like by me healing it started kind of skyrocketed this healing in my family

as well for other things that they've even struggled with and which is a beautiful,

that's a beautiful thing, I think.

I said it in the last episode, and I'm going to say it again now.

The more people who know about the Ministry of Hope Network, the more

women they're going to be able to help.

And the more women they're able to help, the better it is for all of us.

So, be sure to follow them on Facebook, check out their website, and share this

episode with somebody that you know.

But before that, there's one more message that Jesalyn has

for all of Small Town Friendly.

If you could say one thing to everybody in Rutherford County,

what would

that be?

We Do recover.

We do.

I don't know.

I know that sounds simple.

that's something they used to say in like, in yeah, it's possible.

Also that sobriety is in Rutherford County.

it's such a small county.

Somebody was telling me the other day, they were like, one of the

gifts of sobriety is getting to live two different lives in one.

kind of like an addiction and a healthy lifestyle as well, lifestyle and what God

has in store for you, reach out to people,

call your loved ones, God has such an amazing plan for you,

Thanks for listening to this episode of Small Town Big God.

There are links to Hope Network's website and Facebook page in the description.

Go check them out, show your support for the work that they're doing, and thank you

for being a part of Small Town Friendly.