The cats and dogs of the starship Initiative are studying a geode asteroid when a rogue Pollengi vessel shows up, forcing two officers to be teleported out of danger with unsettling results.

Today’s story is the first of two parts of “Crystal Fusion” by Mary E. Lowd, the prolific author of the Otters In Space trilogy, the Entangled Universe trilogy, and many other furry sci-fi books and short stories.  You can find more of Mary’s stories on Deep Sky Anchor and in the Deep Sky Anchor Podcast. You can read more about the cats and dogs of the starship Initiative, boldly going where no cat or dog has gone before, in Tri-Galactic Trek, published by FurPlanet Press.

Read for you by the author herself.

You’re listening to The Voice of Dog,

and Today’s story is the first of two parts of

“Crystal Fusion” by Mary E. Lowd,

the prolific author of the Otters In Space trilogy,

the Entangled Universe trilogy,

and many other furry sci-fi books and short stories.

You can find more of Mary’s stories on Deep Sky Anchor

and in the Deep Sky Anchor Podcast.

You can read more about the cats and dogs of the starship Initiative,

boldly going where no cat or dog has gone before,

in Tri-Galactic Trek,

published by FurPlanet Press.

Please enjoy “Crystal Fusion”

by Mary E. Lowd, Part 1 of 2

"Here, let me carry those,"

Lt. Vonn woofed to the team of scientists packing a crate with electronic devices

that looked like funny mechanical spiders,

sprouting metal legs in every direction.

The scientists -- an orange tabby cat wearing techno-focal goggles,

an arctic fox android, and a very striking brown cat with leopard spots --

finished arranging the last few mechanical spiders,

closed the top over them,

and stepped back from the heavy crate gratefully.

Lt. Vonn stood a head and shoulders taller than all three of them --

even the spotted cat, who was unusually tall for a cat.

"What are these things?" Lt. Vonn asked,

getting a good grip on the sides of the crate.

It was heavy. But nothing she couldn't handle.

She liked being big and strong enough to help and protect the smaller officers aboard the starship Initiative.

Though, of course,

the arctic fox android --

no matter how small and delicate zhe might seem --

could probably lift Lt. Vonn with one paw.

The yellow Labrador always forgot about that.

And when she remembered, her tail started wagging,

and she felt all shy and nervous,

like a little Labrador puppy instead of a full grown dog.

The tall spotted cat --

a Bengal, most likely --

began explaining something about radio receivers and communications arrays,

but a lot of the words went right over Lt. Vonn's head.

She was a security officer after all,

not a scientist. Brawn,

not brain. Also, she might have gotten kind of distracted when Fact,

the android fox, wandered away to return to zir duties.

Zir white tail was so thick and fluffy!

And zhe held it so

preternaturally still.

still... "I'm sorry," Lt. Vonn said, when the Bengal cat stopped explaining.

"I didn't follow much of that, but I'm excited to help out.

out." The spotted cat shook her head and sighed.

"I can't say it seems fair to me

that I've been studying geode asteroids my whole life,

and you'll get to actually go inside of one

without even understanding what you're doing...

while I'm stuck back here in a starship engine room.

room." Lt. Vonn gave the Bengal cat a lopsided, sympathetic smile.

"I'll have my spacesuit cam on,"

she said, lifting up the crate.

"So you can watch everything I see.

Just contact me over my comm-pin,

and I can make a point of looking closer at anything that interests you.

After I help Lt. LeGuin set these spider-radios up,

I won't have anything else to do.

By the way, I'm Lt. Vonn."

"Dr. Ada Wolfgang," the Bengal cat said.

"The universe's pre-eminent expert on the mathematics and crystallography of oversized geodes.

geodes." She held out a paw,

then laughed when she realized how foolish that was.

Both of Lt. Vonn's paws were already busy holding the crate.

"Come on," Lt. LeGuin said.

"The sooner we get the communications array setup, the sooner we can try contacting another universe

where you're not the pre-eminent expert on the coolest subject of study in existence.

existence." He was the orange tabby wearing techno-focal goggles,

and the grin on his muzzle showed he was teasing.

Lt. LeGuin was also the chief engineer

and Fact's best friend;

a fact that caused Lt. Vonn's floppy yellow ears to burn with jealousy.

The orange cat and white fox simply had a bond that totally eluded Lt. Vonn.

The yellow Labrador just

didn't know how to act around cats --

or Fact, who was much more catlike than doglike --

a lot of the time.

They made her feel all clumsy and overeager,

like everything she did was

too much, too big,

too loud. Lt. Vonn carried the crate of spider-radios through the gently curving halls of the Initiative with Lt.

LeGuin rushing to keep up beside her.

When they got to the teleporter bay,

she set down the crate on the pad, and the two of them pulled spacesuits over their Tri-Galactic Navy uniforms. Lt. LeGuin's space helmet

had triangular protrusions on the top,

leaving space for his pointy ears.

Lt. Vonn's space helmet was more rounded;

her floppy ears didn't need as much space.

The dog and cat took up positions on either side of the crate,

and the white terrier operating the teleporter control station initiated the teleportation beam.

Quantum energy sparkled,

filling Lt. Vonn's vision with colorful explosions,

like a tiny fireworks display just for her,

and flushing through her body -- floppy ears down to blunt-clawed toes --

with the tickly, creepy-crawly sensation of a million butterfly wings fanning her,

making her thick fur stand on end.

She loved the feeling.

It was like bathing in champagne,

or so she imagined.

Maybe more like becoming champagne -- her body

breaking apart into tiny bubbles of effervescence and reforming

somewhere else. When the sparkly quantum energy cleared from Lt. Vonn's vision,

her stomach flipped at the change in gravity.

She was floating now,

outside of the starship where she lived.

She could see the graceful, silver curves of the Initiative in front of her.

With a gentle tap on her rotational thrusters, Lt. Vonn turned herself to where she could see Lt. LeGuin

in his spacesuit

and the crate of spider-radios floating beside them.

Beyond them, she saw the asteroid.

A lumpy, mottled gray sphere.

A big rock, about the same size as the starship Initiative.

It looked like nothing special.

Lt. Vonn had seen countless asteroids on her missions.

The captain's voice crackled to life over Lt. Vonn's helmet radio:

"We're ready to begin cutting the asteroid.

Are you prepared?"

Both lieutenants concurred, and within moments, a beam of red light fired from the Initiative's blazor cannon,

narrow and precise enough to perform surgery.

And it was surgery in a way.

For Dr. Wolfgang's purposes,

the crystals inside the asteroid needed to remain intact,

unharmed by a starship carving an entrance into the dull rock exo-skeleton cradling them.

When the blazor beam ceased,

Lt. Vonn maneuvered her way to the asteroid with a practiced paw on her jetpack controls.

The zero gee made her feel funny and

a little nauseous,

but she'd learned from years of training in the academy to control herself anyway.

She stayed focused on the task at hand.

A perfectly round hole graced the surface of the asteroid now.

The blazor beam had vaporized the rock,

leaving behind a passageway

as straight and round as nothing found in nature.

Lt. Vonn rotated herself back around to face the cat-shaped spacesuit

floating beside the crate.

"It looks safe," she radioed

to Lt. LeGuin.

"Awesome," he answered.

He took hold of the crate with both paws, and then his jetpack engaged, shoving him toward the asteroid.

In the zero gee of space, the crate was no longer too heavy for a small cat like him.

All cats seemed small to Lt. Vonn. She let Lt. LeGuin fly past her, guiding the crate ahead of him,

directly into the passageway.

The yellow lab was about to follow him,

when she saw a glimmer in the distance.

The glimmer could have been a distant star going supernova,

or simply the flash of a meteoroid catching the light of this system's sun.

Then the space beside the Initiative wavered --

like a scene viewed through moving water --

bending all the starlight.

And suddenly a second ship appeared, having dropped out of the hyper-spatial dimensions reached by using a zephyr drive.

The second ship was gold and bronze, decorated with bright, faceted protrusions of emerald green and ruby red.

It looked more like a piece of costume jewelry dropped carelessly into a puddle reflecting the starry night sky

than an actual spaceship in the depths of space.

"Pollengi..." Lt. Vonn muttered to herself.

They'd encountered the chicken-like aliens before,

and she recognized their style.

Engaging her radio, she said, "Captain, there's a Pollengi vessel.

Should Lt. LeGuin and I return to the ship?"

"Negative, Lieutenant,"

the first officer's voice answered.

Commander Wilker was a Collie dog and excellently loyal to their Sphynx cat captain.

Lt. Vonn admired him for that.

Loyalty is a praiseworthy trait.

Still, she'd have felt better hearing the command from the captain himself.

Another voice came on the radio,

melodic and feline:

"Once they're inside the asteroid, it won't be safe to teleport out. My math is very clear on that.

that." Ah, yes, Lt. Vonn realized she was listening to the Bengal cat,

Dr. Wolfgang. "I'm aware of the situation,"

Cmdr. Wilker replied,

"but the captain is talking to the Pollengi Supreme right now

and has everything under control. Please,

proceed as planned.

planned." Lt. Vonn was a good dog who knew how to follow orders,

so she followed Lt. LeGuin down the narrow corridor

the Initiative had carved into the asteroid.

Nearly as soon as she entered, the yellow lab found herself drenched in deep darkness.

The sunlight that spilled over the asteroid's surface

and the two ships

didn't reach more than a few inches into the hole,

given the angle of its entrance.

But the hole was

straight, as straight as could be, so Lt. Vonn had no trouble navigating.

"I'm turning on my helmet cam now," Lt. Vonn said for the radio.

"But I'm still in the entrance tunnel, so all you'll see is blackness.

blackness." Dr. Wolfgang answered with an excited trill in her voice:

"I can't wait!" Lt. LeGuin joined the conversation:

"Oh, right, I've been so busy getting the crate unpacked, I didn't even think to turn my camera on.

Here you go." Lt. Vonn heard the Bengal cat gasp over the radio

and felt a little ruffled that Lt. LeGuin --

who hadn't even been paying attention to the mathematician's desires --

had gotten to inspire the happy sound.

And why hadn't he been paying attention?

Lt. LeGuin was the member of the Initiative's crew

who had been working most closely with their visiting expert.

He should be the one most tuned into her needs.

Lt. Vonn supposed

she should chock the orange tabby's thoughtlessness up to either

a cat's self-absorption

or an engineer's head in the clouds.

Either way, she didn't understand why Fact was so much more fond of Lt. LeGuin

than zhe was of her.

If Fact only knew

how much Lt. Vonn thought about zir,

and the attention she could pay to making zir happy...

Light appeared in the distance;

a round disk of

light. Lt. Vonn pressed her paws against the sides of the tunnel,

and then kicked off,

giving herself a burst of speed.

Moments later, she emerged into a wonderous, sparkling cavern.

The sight was breath-taking,

and she gasped too,

just like Dr. Wolfgang had before.

The cavern was lit by a lantern Lt. LeGuin had set up beside the crate of spider-radios.

The crate was open,

and the spindly mechanical objects drifted through the space around the crate like a cloud.

A very disturbing, sharp-edged cloud.

Their shadows, cast by the lantern,

caused the light to flicker and dance over the many facets of the many, many crystals that curved all the way around them.

Every direction Lt. Vonn looked,

she saw light dancing and glimmering on the smooth, angled surfaces of purple-blue crystals.

It was quite possibly the most beautiful sight the dog had ever seen.

Usually, Lt. Vonn was partial to green worlds --

thick with trees and shrubs,

maybe the occasional lake or seaside to splash in.

She was a practical dog that way.

She liked a planet that was good for romping on.

Sure, maybe a sandy beach could be fun,

and if the sand sparkled under the sunlight of a foreign star,

all the better. But what mattered most to Lt. Vonn was that she could put her paws down on solid ground,

stretch her legs,

and go for a run with the wind of an

alien atmosphere whistling past her ears.

This geode asteroid had none of that.

Yet she found herself speechless, staring at the crystal facets,

mesmerized by the way the light played over them,

winking and shining at her as if the light itself were a lifeform

trying to catch her attention.

"Are you going to help set up the communications array?"

Lt. LeGuin meowed archly, shaking the dog from her reverie.

"Yes, right, of course," Lt. Vonn woofed.

She tapped her jetpack thrusters

and floated into the middle of the hollow asteroid.

She grabbed up an armful of spider-radios and followed Lt. LeGuin's instructions for placing them at the vertices between the crystals arching around them,

spaced evenly, regularly,

all pointing inward.

After getting one of the spider-radios properly and firmly positioned, Lt. Vonn couldn't help taking a moment

to stare at her face reflected in the crystals.

A yellow dog tinted purple-blue,

wearing a spacesuit, stared back at her from every angle.

So many dogs. All of them

good, working hard to help Lt. LeGuin.

Her tail wagged, and her muzzle broke into a smile.

Then seeing the other dogs smiling,

the smile widened,

and her tail wagged harder,

even though it was trapped in the left leg of her spacesuit.

"I wish it were my face,"

Dr. Wolfgang said over the radio.

"What?" Lt. LeGuin asked.

He was still focused and working hard,

not getting distracted by his own reflection like some

foolish, pre-uplift animal who didn't understand the concept of mirrors.

"Sorry," Lt. Vonn woofed.

"I was getting distracted by the way the crystals reflect my face."

"Hey, don't be too sorry," Dr. Wolfgang meowed.

Maybe purred was more accurate.

"I may never get a chance to see the inside of a macro-geode myself,

and even if it wasn't my own face looking back at me,

that was one hell of an image to carry in my head for the rest of my

life." Lt. Vonn couldn't tell if the Bengal cat had planned on saying more,

but either way, she was cut off by the gruff sound of Cmdr. Wilker's bark:

"Heads up, Vonn and LeGuin.

Negotiations aren't going well with the Pollengi Supreme.

This vessel isn't acknowledging the Tri-Galactic

Navy's peace treaty with their empire from last year. So,

you may need to get out of there fast."

"How fast?" Lt. LeGuin meowed back,

sounding very concerned.

"We've almost finished set--"

"Abandon the mission for now," Cmdr. Wilker barked. "Get yourselves into teleporter range." Lt. Vonn dropped the spider-radio she'd been holding, leaving it floating in front of her. "You heard the

commander," she woofed.

"Back to the tunnel." She pushed a paw against the closest crystal face, rotating herself until she could see that Lt. LeGuin was following orders

and flying toward the tunnel out.

He was a good officer,

but even the best science officers had a tendency to lose track of the correct priorities

when their little science projects were at stake.

And it was Lt. Vonn's job as security officer to make sure that

everyone in her team stayed on track --

even distractable science officers.

And of course, the thing was,

those spider-radios would still be there

after everything was sorted out with the rogue Pollengi vessel.

As far as Lt. Vonn knew,

this had never been a time sensitive mission,

and so a short delay

shouldn't be a problem.

She wished she could explain that to Lt. LeGuin and Dr. Wolfgang,

but she suspected they already knew it.

They were both very smart cats.

It was always frustrating for Lt. Vonn that scientists could know things

like that and still

be upset about delays.

It seemed irrational to her, and yet cats like Lt. LeGuin and Dr. Wolfgang were always running circles around her with their complicated logic, making her feel foolish and slow.

Just as Lt. Vonn was about to enter the tunnel out of the geode -- Lt. LeGuin looked

like he was already halfway down it --

Cmdr. Wilker's voice came over the radio again:

"Prepare for emergency teleportation.

teleportation." "What?!?" Dr. Wolfgang shrieked over the radio in a voice that sounded like a jungle had come to life.

"Commander, I'm almost out of--" Lt.

LeGuin began.

Then the tickly, tingly, effervescent feeling of quantum energy roared in Lt. Vonn's ears,

sparkled in her eyes,

and bloomed deep inside her belly, growing outward and consuming her

all the way to her toe pads and ear tips

in its peaceful, giggly glow. #

When the roaring,

sparkling, and giggly feeling subsided,

Lt. Vonn found herself standing on the teleporter pad and saying, "-

-the asteroid." Why was she saying that?

Wait... Everything felt wrong,

and Lt. Vonn was afraid

to move. Her balance was off, more so

than should be caused by her tail being trapped on one side of her spacesuit.

And everything looked wrong...

complicated, mathematical.

She could see heat patterns --

the way that the air was moving in the teleporter room,

swirling in the corners and

flowing gently but steadily towards vents near the floor.

And she knew numbers assigned to everything -- the exact temperature of the air, the exact brightness and

spectrum of the light,

and the exact distance down to the millimeter between herself and everything she could see.

How did she know those numbers?

Lt. Vonn lifted a hand toward her head, trying to remove the helmet from her spacesuit and

feeling like she couldn't breathe. Her lungs

were too small. How could her lungs be too small?

Then she saw the white terrier who had been working the teleporter controls coming toward her.

His muzzle gaped, and his eyes were so wide...

so wide... he looked as aghast as if he were staring at a horrible monster.

But he was looking at her.

To her extreme embarrassment, Lt. Vonn felt her legs buckle and fold as her stomach turned cold and sour inside her.

She sank to the floor, vision growing flat,

gray, and dim. # The next time Lt. Vonn awoke,

she was staring at the med bay ceiling.

"What happened?" she tried to say,

and she heard the words come from her.

But it wasn't her voice.

The tone was too high,

too feline. And why did she keep thinking of herself as

"her"? And why had she thought that

at all? Lt. Vonn brought her paws to her head,

moaning softly and uncontrollably.

Even the moaning sounded wrong, and it

felt wrong coming out of her mouth.

She didn't know how to move her tongue right. It was

too big and thick.

Or too small and thin?

And her paws, when they came into view, were striped. Lt. Vonn began to whimper like a tiny kitten. No a puppy. Why would a dog like him compare himself to a kitten?

Like her. Like him.

"Who am I?" The voice still sounded wrong. But this time,

it sounded too canine, and that felt like the final straw.

Whoever she was, the being that had comfortably thought of herself as Lt. Vonn only moments ago --

or maybe longer, depending on how long she'd been unconscious for --

was ready to crack.

Then she saw the face of her best friend.

Gold eyes, angular white muzzle,

and the most perfectly triangular ears of any creature.

Fact the android arctic fox looked down at her, and Lt. Vonn's heart started to race as it always did when she saw the object of her unprofessional, puppy-like crush.

Then it calmed, as it always did in the presence of her best friend and closest

companion. "Wait..." she said, with her awkwardly wide and narrow tongue. "You're Lt. LeGuin's best friend...

not mine. Right?" Fact's muzzle quirked into a sad, sympathetic smile.

"You are my best friend, Lt. LeGuin,

but you are also my respected colleague, Lt. Vonn.

There was a teleporter accident.

accident." The android fox held up a mirror,

and the creature who could no longer think of themself as Lt. Vonn stared at their yellow-orange, stripey face.

Their ears were more and less triangular than they should be;

the triangular tips flopped over in a way that was

completely wrong for a cat,

and completely inadequate

for a yellow Labrador.

Their whiskers were longer and shorter than they'd been,

on a muzzle that looked

more like Fact's than it had before.

Technically, Fact was not an arctic fox;

zhe simply had snowy white fur and had been designed to look

halfway between a cat and a dog, which landed approximately in the area of fox.

Right now, the singular being who should have been two separate beings --

Lt. Vonn the yellow Labrador and Lt. LeGuin the orange tabby --

was approximately halfway between cat and dog.

They were a pale orange striped fox, wearing a sea green uniform made from

fabric that was bewilderingly halfway between the bold mustard yellow of a security officer's uniform

and the bright ocean blue of a science officer.

Even their eyes were a strange in-between color --

a muddled shade of swampy green --

both brown and emerald,

depending on the angle.

Upon seeing their eyes, the confused being gasped and said,

"I can see." They held their paws up to their face again,

turning the striped appendages back and forth,

looking at their claws --

too sharp and too blunt,

only able to partially retract.

"I mean, of course I can see...

but my goggles..." "In your current form," Fact said,

lowering the mirror, "Dr. Keller surmised that you wouldn't need the techno-focal goggles to see, so we took them off before you woke up."

"Thank you," the confused, muddled being said.

"I remember seeing through them for a minute...

before..." "Before you fainted,"

Fact supplied helpfully.

"In the teleporter bay."

"Yes, it was very confusing.

confusing." Except, as soon as they said those words,

they felt a rebelling sensation deep inside their mind:

it hadn't been confusing.

Seeing through the techno-focal goggles was normal,

and it was helplessly confusing to be without all the specific, exact numbers that were usually attached to every object in their sight.

What temperature was it in the room?

Which way was the air flowing? Was Fact's body temperature its usual number of degrees cooler than was normal for other --

biological -- officers?

Or had zir temperature raised with the stress of this situation, as Lt. LeGuin had known it to do before? How could Lt. LeGuin tell if his friend was distressed, if he couldn't read zir exact body temperature?

What a ridiculous concern to have.

Lt. Vonn had never been able to read exact body temperatures before,

and she couldn't believe that she suddenly felt bereft without knowing them now.

"I... need a name. I don't even know how to think of myself. I feel like

I'm fighting inside...

trying to be two different people.

people." The tabby fox stared at the arctic one with pleading eyes.

"Since you're biologically --

and seemingly intellectually -- a blending of Lt. LeGuin and Lt. Vonn,"

Fact said, "it would be logical to call you by a blending of their --

or your, I guess -- names.

I suggest, LeVonn. At least,

for now. Unless you prefer a different name?"

"No, no, thank you," LeVonn replied, deeply grateful for their friend's help.

They could always rely on Fact to be there for them.

Just... usually in different amounts.

Lt. Vonn would have relied on Fact as a fellow officer, implicitly trustworthy and completely competent.

Whereas, Lt. LeGuin

would have relied on Fact as a friend,

someone who was always there, even before he realized

that he needed zir.

Lt. Vonn would have given

anything for the effortless closeness that Fact had with Lt. LeGuin. And now...

maybe she had it herself?

Or maybe he'd lost it...

all muddled by being combined with someone else...

LeVonn didn't know what their relationship was to Fact.

The arctic fox cleared zir throat --

an affectation, as zir android body never actually needed to breathe,

sigh, cough, or clear its throat.

Then zhe said, "Another question to consider:

what pronouns would you like others to use for you?"

LeVonn's swampy eyes widened.

This was all too much.

They were half cat,

half dog now. And of course,

the cat had been a man, and the dog a woman, so...

They hadn't thought about their gender yet -- what was it?

Before LeVonn could get too overwhelmed by the question, Fact continued on to say,

"If I might make a suggestion--"

"Please make suggestions," LeVonn implored. "-

-you seem to be torn between the two identities that you remember.

This suggests a plurality in your existence,

and perhaps they/them pronouns would be most appropriate?"

LeVonn nodded eagerly in the way that Lt. Vonn would have and

felt a little silly about it.

A single curt nod would have been enough;

they didn't have to go broadcasting their feelings with such broad, boorish, canine gestures.

"I feel like I'm fighting inside myself," LeVonn muttered unhappily.

"Everything I do feels wrong,

and then I'm angry at myself for doing it wrong...

like saying this right now... why...

why..." They stopped talking,

but the words kept going, silently, inside their shared head:

"Why am I talking about all my feelings like this? Dribbling them out like I'm a leaky faucet --

or some drooling dog; hey!

dog's don't drool --

who can't hold my thoughts inside my own head? Except, now,

I'm not talking, and I'm still mad at myself and can hear the words happening.

Why won't this voice inside my head stop talking? Is this what it's like to be a cat? Always thinking in useless circles?"

"This is hard," LeVonn said aloud.

"Is it going to be over soon?"

Fact didn't answer that question,

and both sides of LeVonn knew that wasn't good.

Over the next few hours, LeVonn underwent a whole battery of medical tests from Dr. Keller.

Next they were subjected to emotional analysis by the visiting dignitary, Consul Tor,

who happened to be from a race of empathic, photosynthetic otters.

Her conclusion? LeVonn's overriding emotional state was confusion.

Such a surprise. LeVonn could have told them all that

without the help of an empath.

Next, Captain Jacques showed up to express sympathy,

take responsibility,

and make vague but emphatic promises.

Somehow, the sphynx cat's assurances were reassuring.

But also, the sight of him mixed up LeVonn's feelings like the inside of their head was a blender --

why did they revere the captain so much?

What was up with their obsession over rank and hierarchy?

Was that their dog side?

It made them feel vaguely disgusted with themself that were so

obsequious. And yet...

the captain really did have a reassuring, confident demeanor.

And he was the captain.

That should mean something, shouldn't it?

"For the time being, of course," Captain Jacques said,

"you will be relieved of your rank and all duties aboard the Initiative."

"But captain--" LeVonn objected.

The captain was having none of it.

"No, no, I'll take no argument on this.

this." The captain's pink-skinned tail swished behind him,

but he kept his triangular ears upright.

"Take some time for yourself... uh,

LeVonn, was it?" LeVonn's own ears flagged, sinking to half mast.

"Yes, captain, that's what I'm going by...

for now." "Well, yes, take some time LeVonn.

LeVonn." The captain's voice turned soft and sympathetic, and he laid a paw on their shoulder.

"Get to know this new version of yourself.

I mean, really, this is a fascinating experience you're having, isn't it?

One of a kind. And that's what we're out here for,

exploring the universe. So,

experience it. And meanwhile, Fact and Dr. Wolfgang are already hard at work figuring out how to reverse the... uh...

situation." Captain Jacques ended his little motivational speech with a winning smile that lifted his whiskers

but didn't reach all the way to twinkling in his eyes.

LeVonn wasn't sure whether to feel encouraged

or not. # When LeVonn was finally released from the med bay by Dr. Keller, the Irish Setter implored them to get some rest.

LeVonn fully intended to comply,

but as soon as they stepped into the corridor, they found their feet stuck --

unable to choose which direction to walk in. Lt. Vonn's quarters were to the left,

in the opposite direction from Lt.

LeGuin's to the right.

The dog's quarters had an especially comfortably couch,

and LeVonn found the idea of lying down on it and falling into a deep sleep very appealing.

Though they were also afraid of what dreams they might have in this state.

They were also afraid that their mind would be

too busy -- thrumming with the buzz of years of incompatible memories, churning like a whirpool,

and trying to sort them into a shape that made sense --

to actually fall asleep.

The cat's quarters, on the other paw, were filled with interesting games and puzzles that the engineer liked to play with in his spare time,

keeping his mind sharp

and active. Those could be enjoyably absorbing.

Perhaps a good puzzle could distract LeVonn from their current state?

Then a horrible thought occurred to them --

what if the presence of the dog's mind mixed in with their cat mind meant

they were no longer clever enough to do any of their beloved puzzles?

Why would a dog be less smart than a cat?

Okay, maybe it wasn't that LeVonn thought their dog-mind would be less smart than their cat-mind. Maybe

it was just that they feared their security officer self was less smart than their engineering side.

Was that better? LeVonn didn't know.

And they still felt a niggling sense of affront, convinced that

yes, their cat-side really thought

dogs were dumber than cats.

With a deep sigh, LeVonn started walking.

They took the corridor straight in front of them which led to neither of their quarters.

The pale orange tabby fox strolled through the corridors of the starship Initiative, swishing their tail,

and watching the faces of the other crew members they passed.

It was a large ship, and not every officer knew every other one.

However, LeVonn didn't look like a normal breed of either cat or dog right now,

so everyone they passed -- cat and dog alike -- gave them strange looks.

Tri-Galactic Navy officers are professionals, and they tried to cover it.

No one outright stared or grimaced.

But LeVonn saw the subtle contortions of their muzzles and dipping of their ears anyway.

LeVonn's own tail swished faster whenever they saw a new person approaching,

but they couldn't tell if it was from

eager excitement -- hope that

this next officer would look at them kindly --

or if it was from agitation.

Irritation and resigned acceptance of the fact that no one aboard this vessel -- their home --

recognized them anymore.

LeVonn couldn't even understand their own body language.

Cat tails swish in irritation.

Dog tails wag in happiness.

How could they tell what they were feeling?

Finally, LeVonn settled on a destination for their wanderings --

they needed to feel more rooted inside this changed body of theirs, and what always made Lt. Vonn feel more rooted in her body

was practicing her martial arts in the lumo-bay. Lt. LeGuin had never done martial arts, so LeVonn didn't have any confusingly contradictory feelings coming from his side of their self.

When they arrived at the closest lumo-bay, they checked the control panel beside the closed double doors.

The lumo-bay already had an occupant,

but it didn't seem to be running a program yet.

So either, the occupant had just arrived and was about to start a program,

or hopefully, they were finishing up.

Then LeVonn could claim the room when they left.

LeVonn shifted their paws,

standing idly in the hallway.

After only a few moments, they impatiently checked the controls again --

still no program running.

They also ran a quick query to see if any of the other lumo-bays were empty right now.

They were not. They were all running programs.

LeVonn could use the control panel to sign up for a time slot in the next available lumo-bay.

In fact, they could even sign up twice,

using both Lt. LeGuin's and Lt. Vonn's identities.

Given the circumstances, they felt entitled,

and truly didn't think anyone else would mind.

And yet, this lumo-bay was right here, sitting idle.

What good was a lumo-bay without a program running?

It was just a big empty room with glowing blue lines inscribing hexagons on all the walls.

LeVonn waited another few minutes,

swishing their tail all the time,

which suggested that their tail might be more likely to swish out of agitation than happiness.

Or maybe it would swish from both and simply be a constantly moving pendulum.

When LeVonn could stay patient no longer,

it occurred to them that whoever was inside

might have been hurt.

Or maybe they were trying to fix a problem with the lumo-bay?

LeVonn could help with that!

Well... Lt. LeGuin could help with that, for sure.

LeVonn could maybe help.

They weren't entirely sure of their capabilities in this confusing form.

LeVonn laid their paw on the control panel, broadcasting a request to the occupant of the lumo-bay for them to come inside.

In response, the double doors slid open.

A spotted cat sat in the middle of the empty room,

cross-legged on the floor.

Her tail lay on the floor behind her,

curled into the shape of a question mark.

Blue hexagons glowed all around her.

Just as the control panel had showed,

no program was running.

"Dr. Wolfgang?" LeVonn asked.

The Bengal turned her head.

As soon as she saw LeVonn, her triangular ears splayed to the side in a clear display of distress.

She didn't even try hiding it.

"I'm sorry," Dr. Wolfgang said.

"I'm so sorry." LeVonn's tail stopped swishing for the first time since they'd left the medical bay.

They stood very still,

letting it sink in that Dr. Wolfgang wasn't looking at them with distress because they were strange and confusing --

because they looked wrong --

but because she felt guilty.

She blamed herself for what had happened.

"It's not your fault,"

LeVonn said. "You couldn't have known that a rogue Pollengi vessel would...

would..." The tabby fox faltered.

They walked closer to Dr. Wolfgang and sat down on the floor beside her.

"Actually, I don't know what happened.

Do you?" "No one told

you?" Dr. Wolfgang asked.

Her feline eyes were so wide they looked like owl eyes.

"I think they were too busy trying to figure out what I am --

you know, asking me questions, running medical exams.

exams." LeVonn shrugged. "In fairness, I didn't ask a lot of questions.

I've been too busy...

busy..." They trailed off, then tapped a paw to the side of their head.

"Too busy in here.

here." Dr. Wolfgang nodded sagely.

"I can understand that.

I've had times in my life when the noise inside my head was too loud to hear anything else.

else." She tilted her head,

still staring at LeVonn with those owl eyes of hers.

"And I've never actually had two whole separate people inside my head.

Just me. Different versions of me."

"Different versions?"

LeVonn asked. They'd been working very closely with Dr. Wolfgang for the last week --

well, one half of them had been --

but they didn't know the Bengal cat very well.

Lt. LeGuin had been interested in knowing her better because he respected her work so much, and Lt. Vonn generally liked getting to know new people.

So for once, their feelings felt unified

and at peace. Because they had so little history together, LeVonn could enjoy being in Dr. Wolfgang's company

in an uncomplicated way,

unfettered by fears or hopes regarding how their relationships might damage or improve

Lt. Vonn's or Lt.

LeGuin's relationships with her.

Dr. Wolfgang drew a deep breath in through her whiskers.

Her owl eyes narrowed, sizing up the mess of an orange tabby fox who'd been created by her own experiment gone wrong.

She started to speak,

then hesitated. LeVonn sat quietly,

waiting. That's what Lt. LeGuin would have done. Lt.

Vonn would have tried to draw her out --

said something encouraging

or reassuring. At least,

that's what LeVonn thought.

It was much easier to sit in silence now that they were half Lt. LeGuin.

Was that why Fact liked the feline engineer so much?

He could be still and silent,

where the yellow lab security officer was always pushing and pleading for interaction?

Finally, Dr. Wolfgang spoke, but LeVonn felt sure that it was to say something different than she'd almost said a moment ago.

"I'm supposed to be working on fixing you --

reversing the teleporter accident that caused your condition.

condition." She smiled sadly.

"But I can't seem to think about math right now.

All I can think about is those Pollengi.

You know why they fired on the asteroid?"

LeVonn shook their head,

even though it was clearly a rhetorical question.

Dr. Wolfgang already knew that they knew nothing.

"The Pollengi believe the geode asteroids are sacred eggs of their gods,"

Dr. Wolfgang said.

LeVonn felt their face scrunch up in a quizzical expression.

Their ears and brow moved differently now than they were used to, and even the feeling of their face reacting to their emotions was confusing and distracting.

"Right, so if it's sacred," Dr. Wolfgang continued,

"why did they fire on it with blazor canons?"

Yet more rhetorical questions.

"Apparently, they told the captain that if they can't have it,

no one can." "That seems very selfish,"

LeVonn said. "What were they even doing here?

Isn't their sector of space hundreds of light-years away?"

The tabby fox was surprised to realize they knew that fact about the location of the Pollengi system...

Then they remembered studying star charts for the locations richest in geode-asteroids as Lt. LeGuin.

The tabby cat had pored over star charts for days and chosen this sector of space for their experiment precisely because it wasn't claimed by the Pollengi. The Pollengi's sector of space was even richer in the giant crystal-filled space rocks.

Their homeworld was positively surrounded by them;

orbited by an entire asteroid belt of geodes.

"It was a rogue vessel.

vessel." Dr. Wolfgang shrugged.

"As soon as Captain Jacques got in touch with the Pollengi Merchant Oligarchy, they completely disowned the rogue vessel's actions and sent their own enforcer vessels to return the rogue to their flock.

Of course... that was well after they'd vaporized our geode, leaving Commander Wilker no choice but to teleport the... uh...

two of you..." Her eyes narrowed again, and ears skewed.

But she recovered quickly. "...

"...out of the asteroid. I begged him not to.

I knew it was dangerous.

I thought it would kill you.

you." Inwardly, LeVonn cringed at the idea of all of those spider-radios having been destroyed.

They'd have to build new ones before the experiment could be attempted again.

"He made the right call,"

LeVonn said dolefully.

"However dangerous teleporting us was,

it was a chance. And being vaporized wouldn't have been better than...

being this." They knew that was true.

They did. Really. But it was very exhausting being a half cat, half dog, with the memories of two

very different people all jumbled together.

"You sound uncertain,"

Dr. Wolfgang said.

LeVonn didn't reply.

They didn't want to confirm Dr. Wolfgang's statement.

But they couldn't deny it.

Not truthfully. And both of their halves were truthful down to the bone.

"Why did you come to the lumo-bay?"

Dr. Wolfgang asked

after the silence had stretched on for a length of time that

would have made Lt. Vonn very uncomfortable.

"I couldn't decide which set of quarters to go to,"

LeVonn said. "And everyone I saw made me feel

weird and uncomfortable --

like I felt two different ways about them, and I couldn't sort the feelings out.

So..." Their ears skewed as they felt confused by their own words:

"I decided to come here and

do some martial arts.

arts." It had seemed like a good plan at the time.

Now LeVonn couldn't entirely remember why.

Maybe their feline side had taken over more control while they'd been sitting there,

talking to someone Lt. LeGuin knew.

"Don't let me get in your way,"

Dr. Wolfgang said, standing up.

"In fact, that actually sounds like a wonderful way to clear my head.

I came here because,

sometimes when I get stuck on math,

it helps to get my body moving.

moving." She smiled and swished her tail in an almost dog-like way.

"I've never done martial arts, but I'd love to try.

Maybe you could teach me?

That is, as long as my presence here isn't too confusing..."

"No," LeVonn said, almost too eagerly.

"I didn't know you very well as either of myselves. So,

it's actually kind of

restful being around you.

you." LeVonn tried not to think about how confused they felt about Fact right now --

part of them wanted to just sit near the android, quietly,

saying nothing. Another part

desperately wanted to see if their newfound closeness meant the arctic fox would be willing to kiss them.

And the first part was horrified by that possibility and terrified by what results

it might lead to,

what damage it might wreck on their friendship with Fact if this situation ever got reversed.

When this situation got reversed. Damn, they needed to get their feet and arms moving.

Anything to pull them back out

of their muddled up head.

Ah yes, that’s why martial arts had seemed like a good idea...

This was the first of two parts of

“Crystal Fusion” by Mary E. Lowd,

read for you by the author herself.

Tune in next time to find out whether LeVonn and Dr. Wolfgang

manage to reverse the teleporter accident

or if LeVonn will have to find a way to live as their new, combined self.

As always, you can find more stories on the web at thevoice.dog, or find the show wherever you get your podcasts.

Thank you for listening

to The Voice of Dog.