Welcome back to Lending Leadership, your destination for candid conversations and game-changing insights from across the mortgage and real estate industries.

This week, we're mixing things up. Rachael is going solo for a deep dive into the lessons we’ve learned after hosting 150+ interviews with some of the finest in our business, either on this show or her previous podcast. From CEOs to loan officers, entrepreneurs to realtors, we’ve chatted with them all. Over the years, we’ve uncovered some surprising truths and recurring themes about what really drives long-term success in lending, leadership, and life.

We kick things off by debunking the notion that there’s a “secret morning routine” or a hidden hack behind every high-performer. Instead, we reveal five powerful patterns that show up again and again in the stories of successful people and challenge you to apply them in your own journey.

We also share some relatable stories: embracing messy journeys, overcoming failure, and learning that sometimes the biggest breakthroughs come from simply picking up the phone (no algorithm required!). And, in true Lending Leadership fashion, we offer a practical challenge to reconnect with your network authentically no sales pitch necessary.

Key takeaways:

1. True Leaders Don’t Need to Be the Smartest in the Room: We observe that the best leaders are comfortable saying “I don’t know,” and they intentionally surround themselves with people who sharpen and challenge them. Admitting you were wrong or changing direction isn’t defeat, it's a sign of real leadership and growth.
2. Exceptional Success Starts With Asking Better Questions: We reflect on the power of curiosity. Instead of relying on yes-or-no questions or dominating the conversation, top performers listen, dig deeper, and encourage diverse perspectives. The willingness to ask “What am I missing?” and truly hear the answer often leads to better solutions.
3. Relationships Remain the Ultimate Cheat Code: Despite all the AI, tech, and automation at our fingertips, our interviews consistently reinforce that genuine relationships and simply reaching out to the people you already know will open more doors than obsessing over the latest marketing tactic. Sometimes, success just means texting five people who like you with no pitch attached.
4. Every Success Story Is Messier Than It Looks: We pull back the curtain on the reality behind our guests’ polished resumes and accolades. Everyone, no matter how accomplished, has faced setbacks, self-doubt, and failures. If you’re in your own “messy middle,” failure is often just the start of a new chapter.
5. There Is No Secret Just Consistent Action: After all these conversations, the magic formula is actually disappointingly simple: follow up, do what you say you’ll do, keep building relationships, and repeat. Integrity and grit, not hacks and shortcuts, are what separate those who succeed from those who stall. The hardest part? Doing it consistently, long after others have moved on to the next shiny thing.

As we prepare for our 100th episode, we’re grateful for everyone who’s been on this journey with us. So here’s our challenge for you: What’s the one thing that’s made the biggest difference in your success, and are you still doing it today?

Don’t forget: you’ve had the power all along. We can’t wait to keep exploring, growing, and leading together.

So I noticed something interesting recently. Um, over the past 5 years or so, I've had the privilege of interviewing probably close to about 150 people, um, through Lending Leadership and then the podcast that I, that I hosted before this. And it's kind of fun when you say it out loud, that seems like a lot of people. And I've talked to CEOs, I've talked to loan officers, I've talked to entrepreneurs and realtors and people who've built massive businesses. And, um, You know, it's funny when you have this many conversations, and you may notice the same thing, when you have a lot of conversations, things start to stand out, you know, kind of common threads. And as different as people are, there are certain things that just keep coming up over and over again. So, spoiler alert, nobody has revealed some magic routine as much as Miracle Morning is, yes, a magical routine. But— For the most part, people haven't discovered this magical concoction of get up at 4:30, 7:00 AM, take an ice bath, and journal for 42 minutes, and then they wildly become successful.

Thank God, because I'm not that person. But I have noticed a lot of common threads. And so today, it's just me and I thought I would chat with you and I thought it would be fun to learn about some things that I've learned over The past 150 podcast episodes. So here we go. Welcome to Lending Leadership. Okay. So the first thing I've noticed is that the best leaders, they're not trying to prove they're the smartest people in the room. As much as other people want to say, oh, they just want to be the smartest people in the room.

I think that the most successful people, they surround themselves with really smart people. They don't need to feel feel or be the smartest people in the room. The people who impress me are usually the ones who are really comfortable saying, I don't know about that, or, that didn't work. I had to change my mind, or, I think this might be one of my personal favorites, I hired someone who's way better at doing that than I am. And I think there's something really powerful about Someone who doesn't need you to know how smart they are, but they surround themselves with very smart people. I think that is a major common thread with a lot of the very successful people that I've that I've come across. I think the opposite is true too. We've all been in a meeting with someone who has to answer everything, and you're sitting there thinking, you know, you could have just said you didn't know, Bob.

You're like they have to come up with something just to say something when really they don't have the answer to it. So you don't have to. Fill in the blank spaces. It's sometimes best to say, I don't know. I think really good leaders are confident enough to just be curious, and they're willing to listen to someone who knows more than they do and willing to change direction. That is a big thing too. If you are a leader, being willing to— I don't want to say admit defeat, but being willing to change direction and go down a path that Maybe something isn't working and to realize when something is not working and when to fold and go down a different path. They're willing to say, okay, maybe my idea wasn't the best idea, which can definitely be very hard.

But especially when your idea was a really good idea in your head. How many times does that happen to us? It's a great idea on paper and in your mind, but then when push comes to shove, it's not actually working. the way that you wanted it to, or the way that you had forecasted, it's okay to take a pause and to change directions. Um, so here's a question that I've been thinking about. When was the last time somebody on your team changed your mind? I'll say it again. When was the last time someone on your team changed your mind? Because if the answer is never, then, uh-oh. Think there's a problem there. Um, so surround yourself with people who really sharpen you, who kind of help you question, and, and in a healthy way.

We don't want people who are always playing devil's advocate, um, and because that can be kind of exhausting. But the people that challenge you, I think that's really important. Okay, the second thing that I've noticed is really successful people Ask really good questions. Obviously, I ask a lot of questions to people. I, I think questions are important, especially in a sales role. You know, a lot of times people can have a conversation with someone and they— the person that they're talking to can just be asking questions, and really that's all they're doing is just asking questions. They're not really filling in any of their own stories or their own advice. But that other person walks away feeling like, wow, that was such a great conversation.

I can't tell you how many times that's happened to me where I'm interviewing someone and someone's like, wow, that was, that was dynamic. I really felt like we were on fire. And I'm like, I was just asking the questions. The other person was the one that was really doing all the talking. So, um, so learn to ask really good questions and not just yes or no questions, questions that are actually going to lead to a conversation. Something funny happens when you do that. You know, I'll get a guest on before we start recording and within 5 minutes they're interviewing me. They want to know about HMA.

They want to know about the podcast, how we got started. They ask, you know, maybe what I'm seeing in the industry. And suddenly I'm like, you know, hold on a minute. Who's interviewing who here? So to kind of switch the roles and turn things around and ask really good questions. But I don't think that happens by accident with very successful people. You know, they're curious, they're salespeople, they know the average salespeople want— the average salesperson tells you what they want to hear, so they know that. So a really good salesperson wants to understand what you need. And so the average question is, oh, can you tell me about your program? But a better question might be, well, what's frustrating you about the way you're doing it right now? Those are 2 completely different conversations.

And it's the same thing with leadership. I think instead of walking into a room and saying, here's what we're doing, sometimes the better question is, what am I missing? And that's a very hard question to ask if you're not actually willing to hear the answer. I think the best leaders that I've talked to, they actually want the answer. So think about that. Ask questions that are, that are not just yes or no questions, but then don't be afraid of the answer that you get and really let that kind of lead your teams, lead your decisions. Um, and so ask really good questions. That's definitely something that I think is a superpower. Okay.

Number 3 might be my favorite. This sounds simple, but I, I think it's very important, especially in this AI world. That relationships are still the cheat code. Relationships are still the cheat code. So you know we're constantly talking about tech and AI, social media, CRMs, automation, all the all the things, algorithms, funnels, you know all of these buzzwords. But I love all that stuff, and I love marketing. We we need this stuff, but. After all of these conversations that I've had with people, I can't remember one person telling me, you know, Rach, everything finally changed when I figured out the Instagram algorithm.

But I can tell you how many times I've heard, oh, someone introduced me, someone recommended me, someone made a phone call, I made a phone call, I stopped just being afraid of the phone and I just picked up the phone and— or I answered the phone. And I think that's fascinating to me because as many toys and tools and tech and all the things that we have, and, and we're spending so much time trying to figure out how to reach more people. Sometimes the biggest opportunities in our lives come from going deeper with the people we already know. If you've watched or listened to any of this podcast, you know I'm a huge Wizard of Oz fan, and I love when Glinda the Good Witch says, you've had the power all along. Right? Dorothy looks down and she's Has the ruby red slippers and she's had the power all along. You have the power all along. You don't need to add anything else. Does that other stuff help? Absolutely.

Is it important? Absolutely. But the conversations that we have, the people who are in our own backyard, reaching those people is number one. And having those actual relationships are so important. And it's important, I think, to not complicate things. You know, you don't need a strategy to text somebody and say, hey, you popped into my head today. How are you? Or you don't, you don't need a CRM automation to congratulate somebody, or you don't need a funnel to grab a cup of coffee. You know, definitely don't have your AI write something like, hey, give me a better way to say hello in a text. Just Say hello.

And I think sometimes we can get in our own way with that. So here's my little challenge. I want you to think about 5 people who genuinely like you. Don't think about the people that maybe don't like you because I'm sure there's not anyone who doesn't like you. But think about the 5 people that genuinely like you who you haven't spoken to in a while and text them. That's it. No pitch. No, oh, by the way, if you're looking to buy or refinance, or if, uh, if you haven't heard about this Buy Before You Sell program— No, don't, don't ruin it.

Just be normal. Be cool. Just be human. So 5 people, send them a text right now. I'll wait. Okay, maybe I won't. You can do it later. On to number 4.

The 4th thing I've learned is that everyone's story Is a lot messier than it looks. Yeah. This is probably the one thing that's changed my outlook on successful people the most. And honestly, my dad was a successful registered investment advisor. He had his own RIA finance guy. And so I never had this preconceived notion that successful people just have it all together. You know, it's real. It's sales.

It's hard. But, but I think interviewing all of these people over the years, it's definitely solidified the fact that just when you, you think you know somebody, you really don't know their story. Because when you see someone from the outside, you see the finished product, you see the promotion, you see the, the awards, the accolades, and definitely the bottom line and the numbers. But what you don't see is Tuesday night at 11:00 PM when they're sitting at the kitchen table thinking like, what the hell am I doing? Or almost every time you dig deeper into someone's story, there's a messy part that sometimes it's a really messy part or how they hit rock bottom or maybe lost everything. But then they got up. Then they kept going. So our story isn't over when things kind of— fall apart. That's really when it's just beginning.

We're not always privy to see when someone got fired or a door got closed, or maybe like when they've made a horrible hiring decision or maybe a horrible switch to a different company. So I feel like for a lot of successful people, probably most of them, they will tell you that they have failed more than once in their lives. And they just didn't stop. They kept going. After overcoming challenges, they just kept going. And I think that's what we all need to do. I think we can all clean up our stories and we can all clean up after our stories. And we think that this thing that happened to me is the one thing that, oh, I'm never going to be successful because of XYZ.

But that's going to be part of your success story when you've— When you've reached the goal that you're looking to reach, or 5 years from now when you can look back and say, hey, I realized that happened, but now it's part of the fabric of who I am and it's made me stronger. I think a lot of times we can have that imposter syndrome and we can look at people and think, wow, they really have it together. But meanwhile, that person is probably looking at someone else and thinking the exact same thing. So if you're currently in that story where, you know, maybe things aren't working out for you, it's not over. It's not the end. Keep going. You might just be in the middle and there might just be a really great story 5 years from now in the making. So keep going.

And okay, last thing. Finally, after all these conversations, I've learned that there isn't a secret recipe. There's so many different ways to success. That's probably the least exciting thing that I've learned, but it's true with just about everyone. Everybody wants to know the hack, the book to read that's gonna solve everyone's problems. They want the system. They want the follow the bouncing ball along the line and then I'll be successful if I do all these things. But I think most of the people who have seen success, they aren't doing 47 magical things that nobody else knows about.

They're doing a few things, pretty basic things, but they're doing them really consistently and really freaking well. They make the call, they make the follow-up, they do what they say they're going to do. Their integrity is high. They keep building relationships, they keep learning. And then they do it again and again and again and again and again. And it sounds much less sexy than just, you know, the 5-minute secret to becoming a millionaire, but I think that's really the secret, that there is no secret. And they're willing to keep doing the boring stuff long after everybody else got bored and went looking for a new secret. So after 150 conversations, those are some key things that I feel like are good takeaways for just about everyone.

Good reminders. You don't have to be the smartest person in the room. You don't have to feel like you you need to prove anything to anyone. Ask better questions. Take better care of your relationships. Don't ashamed to be in the messy middle of whatever you're going through, and stop looking for the secret because honestly, I think the chances the chances are you already know what you're supposed to be doing, and the harder part is. Actually doing it consistently. So I'm going to leave you with just one question.

If you, if I had you here on this podcast with me sitting in this, this recording space and we're talking, what would you say is the one thing that's made the biggest difference in your success? What would your answer be? And then here's the slightly uncomfortable follow-up. Are you still doing it? Because maybe we don't need just another strategy. Maybe we just need to go back to that one thing that worked in the first place. And I think that is the key right there. So don't forget, you've had the power all along. Again, Glenda the Good Witch, and I'm excited to continue on this journey with you for the next 150+ conversations that we get to have. Don't forget to like and subscribe to Lending Leaders. 100th episode is coming next week, and we're so excited.

Thanks, guys. Thanks.