Description: From backflipping Boston Dynamics nightmares to $800 robo-discs that can't handle throw pillows, our technological blue-balling is complete. We were promised Rosie from The Jetsons but got digital snitches with PhDs in useless trivia instead of clean houses.

Spice Index: 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️

Why the robot revolution flopped? Simple: Silicon Valley geniuses discovered selling your data is more profitable than building useful robots. They pivoted from "how can we fold laundry?" to "how can we monitor Karen's browsing habits while she shops for conspiracy theories?" Turns out surveillance capitalism beats actual innovation every time. Who needs Rosie when you've got targeted ads?