In this powerful opening episode, Sam Wood confronts one of the most subtle yet destructive forces at work in our relationships, families, and churches. Drawing from Jesus’ words in Luke 17, he exposes a spiritual snare the enemy uses to divide and destroy. With practical insight and biblical clarity, this message challenges us to see conflict through new eyes.

Checkout these other Family Fortress Ministries Podcasts:

TIME FOR THREE daily couples devotional: https://time-for-three.captivate.fm/listen

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Welcome to the Fortifying youg Family podcast.

It can be daunting to navigate through an anti marriage and family culture.

Our teacher will expound biblical principles to help fortify our families and keep these sacred institutions strong.

And now, here's this week's teaching from Sam Wood.

How many of you here tonight as husbands, how many of you have ever been mad at your wife before?

Raise your hand.

Now be honest, some of you husbands say, I'm not raising my hand.

How many of you wives have ever been mad at your husband?

Raise your hand.

I want to tell you, they went up a lot quicker.

How many of you moms and dads have ever been mad at your children before?

Okay, and we'll be fair.

How many kids here have ever been mad at mom and dad before?

Well, they went up really quick right there.

I'm just trying to establish something here tonight that I'm dealing with a bunch of mad people.

You know, we all have conflict.

It doesn't matter whether you're married or whether you're a child or a parent, brothers and sisters in Christ, we all have conflict.

We have to deal with that conflict.

I. I can remember years ago when I got a little bit upset at Debbie about something and I gave her something I'm sure you guys never have done to your wife.

I gave her something called the silent treatment.

And I remember walking around the house looking for her so when I found her, I could ignore her.

I mean, that's pretty bad, isn't it?

And I go to bed at night and I think, sure would like to hug my wife and snuggle up with her.

And I think, I can't do that.

Silent treatment is on.

It's kind of like, you don't touch my toes, I won't touch your toes.

And it's usually over some little nothing, you know, that happens.

And.

But I want to deal with conflict tonight, and I think a very, very important message.

So I hope you will pay close attention tonight.

I hope you'll take notes tonight.

I think this.

And pray this will be a tremendous help to you.

So turn with me to Luke, chapter 17, if you would, in your Bible.

And In Luke, chapter 17, I want to draw your attention to the first five verses there as Jesus speaking here.

Luke, chapter 17.

We'll look at verse one, and I'll read down through verse five.

Then said he or Jesus unto the disciples.

It is impossible, but that offenses will come, but woe unto him through whom they come.

It were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck.

And were cast into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones.

Turn.

Take heed to yourself.

If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him.

And if he repent, forgive him.

And if he trespass against thee seven times in a day and seven times in a day, turn again to thee, saying, I repent.

Thou shalt forgive him.

Now notice the apostles response to this teaching that Jesus gives in verse five.

And the apostles said unto the Lord, increase our faith.

He says in verse 1.

Luke, chapter 17, verse 1.

Then said he unto the disciples, it's impossible, but that offenses will come.

But woe unto him through whom they come.

Now I want to talk to you tonight about one of the most deadly traps that Satan will ever lay in our path.

I've seen it destroy friendships.

I've seen it destroy marriage relationships, seen it destroy parent child relationships.

In fact, I've seen it destroy and split churches down the middle.

You say preacher, what are you talking about?

I'm talking about offense.

Notice a little word there in verse one.

He says it is impossible, but that offenses will come.

The word offend there comes from the Greek word skandalon.

It refers to the part of a trap to which the bait is attached.

Or we might say refers to the trigger, an entrapment.

Therefore the word offense refers to laying a trap or an ensnarement in someone's way.

Notice what Jesus says here.

He says it's impossible, but that offenses will come.

He didn't say maybe they will come.

He didn't say they might come.

He says, what church?

They will come.

It's impossible, but that offenses will come.

Then he adds a very stern warning to those through whom these offenses come.

Very interesting.

In verse two, he says it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck and were cast into the sea than that he should offend one of these little ones.

Now when he says little ones, we think.

I think quickly.

We think of children.

But he's talking about his little ones.

He's not just talking about children.

He's talking about his little ones, brothers and sisters in Christ, or the family.

Even as we sang tonight, the family of.

Now we might ask the question, why does he add such a strong warning in verse two to those through whom offenses come?

I believe it's because being offended has very, very serious consequences.

Hold your finger there in Luke 17 and turn with me to second Timothy, chapter two, and look with me at verse 24.

And in second Timothy, chapter two, Paul is writing a letter of encouragement to Young Timothy.

And in chapter two, he exhorts him to be a faithful minister.

Look at what he says in verse 24 through verse 26.

And the servant of the Lord must not strive, but be gentle unto all men apt to teach patient in meekness, instructing those that oppose themselves.

Or he's saying, those that are in conflict with each other, those that are offended at each other.

It's what it's referring to.

If God peradventure will give them repentance to the acknowledging of the truth, and they may recover themselves out of the snare of the devil who are taken captive by him at his will.

Now, there's a lot in those verses there for us to see.

But what it's saying there.

It's saying that when we are offended, Satan uses this offense as a tool to bring people into bondage and to bring them into.

Into captivity.

Therefore, those who are in opposition, those who are in quarrels, fall.

If they don't come to a repentance of that they fall into the snare or the entrapment of the devil.

Notice what it says at the end of verse 26.

It says, taken captive by him at his will.

Or they're taken captive by him to do his bidding or to do his will.

Now, let me just say here tonight, Satan's will would be to destroy your family.

He hates your family.

Satan's will is to destroy your marriage.

Satan's will is to destroy this church.

He wants to destroy everything that has anything to do with God or Jesus Christ.

Now, to stay.

Listen.

To stay in God's will.

Therefore we must stay free of this thing called offense.

It's no wonder that Jesus says, woe unto that person through whom offenses come.

It were better for him that a millstone were hung about his neck, he was cast in the depths of the sea, than that he should offend one of my little ones.

Because offense, being offended, has serious consequences.

Notice in verse 25, in 2nd Timothy, chapter 2, there in verse 25, it says, in meekness, instructing those that oppose themselves.

If God peradventure will give them repentance.

To what?

To the acknowledging of the truth.

Now we might say, what truth?

The truth that they are captured in Satan's entrapment of offense.

That is, God has to grant them repentance to the acknowledging of the truth, that they're even captured into his entrapment of offense.

Now let me say here tonight, Satan knows how to bait us and he knows how to trap us.

Like to picture it this way, it's Kind of like the slide you saw at the beginning, if you remember, it was like a big mousetrap with a man under the trigger.

And quite a, quite a picture there.

And if you've ever set a mousetrap, the old time mouse traps in your house, it does have a trigger and it has a spring loaded, we might say trap that pulls back in so that you can bait the trigger of that trap usually with a little piece of what, cheese.

You put a piece of cheese on the trigger of that trap, it draws the mouse into that trap, he takes the bait and it springs the trap.

As I said, that trigger of the trap is called offense.

It refers to the trigger of an entrapment.

And it springs that trap and captures, ensnares that mouse into that trap.

So how can we recognize the entrapment offense?

How can we recognize Satan's entrapment of offense?

Only by recognizing the bait that is used on the trigger of this entrapment.

Now offended people are deceived by the bait Satan uses on the trap of offense.

So we must understand what that bait is.

So what is the bait that Satan uses on this entrapment of offense?

Well, the bait is something that, that I think we're all very familiar with that he covers the trigger of the trap of offense with.

And the bait is simply called our pride.

Our pride.

You see, pride says it's not fair what you did to me.

Pride says I've got my rights.

Pride says don't let somebody else take advantage of you that way.

Pride says I'm justified in feeling the way I feel in regard to what you have done to me.

Augustine says pride is the mother of sin that is pregnant with all other sins.

What a statement.

CS Lewis says this.

According to Christian teachers, the essential vice, the utmost evil is pride.

Unchastity, anger, greed, drunkenness and all that are mere flea bites in comparison.

It was through pride that the devil became the Devil.

Pride leads to every other vice.

It is the complete anti God state of mind.

You see, pride enthrones you and dethrones God.

No wonder that God says many places in scripture that he hates pride.

Now in this message tonight I really want to answer three very important questions.

The first question, I'll give you all three, then we're going to dive right into it.

The first question is who potentially can offend you the most?

Then secondly, we will look at what happens if we're offended and we don't come to an acknowledgement of the truth of that offense.

And of course, very importantly, thirdly how do we stay free from Satan's entrapment of offense?

Now, let me just stop here before I kind of dive into these questions tonight and say if the Holy Spirit of God speaks to your heart tonight and brings some person to your mind or some incident to your mind while I'm preaching this message, then he wants you to deal with that tonight.

I don't believe any of us are here by accident tonight, do you?

I believe we're here by divine appointment and God wants to speak to our hearts in some way, every one of us, through his word.

Let's look at this first question tonight.

Who potentially can offend you the most?

I believe the answer to that is, the person who potentially can offend you the most is the person that you care the most about, the person that you're the closest to.

Now, if you're married here tonight, who is that person that you care the most about?

It's your husband.

It's your wife.

So who potentially can offend you the most?

Your husband or your wife?

Okay.

That's very important that we understand.

For example, the bloodiest wars.

Historians will tell you the bloodiest wars that have ever been fought are.

What kind of wars?

Civil wars.

That is father against sons, sometimes one family against a family who used to live next door to them.

We see that civil wars are some of the bloodiest wars that have ever been fought.

The person you care the most about is a person who can most easily offend you.

The most vicious legal cases that have ever lawyers ever try are what kind of cases?

Divorce cases.

That is, here's a husband and wife.

Who said, I do.

Who said, I pledge to you, I'll love you till death do we part, as I said this morning.

But now they've come to a point where they literally hate each other or they're offended at each other and so they get a divorce.

We might say the higher the expectation in that relationship, the greater the potential for the fall of that relationship.

Let me give you an example in Scripture of this.

In Psalm 55, and you probably remember this instance in Psalm 55, and verse 12 through verse 14, it says this.

This is David.

For it was not an enemy that reproached me.

Then I could have borne it.

Neither was it he that hated me, that did magnify himself against me.

Then I would have hid myself from him.

But it was thou, a man, mine equal, my guide and my acquaintance.

We took sweet counsel together, and we walked into the house of God in company.

Now, who's he referring to?

He's referring to his counsellor Epithyphel.

He's saying, listen, it had been my enemy who did this to me.

He said, I could have.

I could have borne it.

He said, if it was somebody who hated me that did what you did to me, then I could have, you know, I could have taken that.

He said, but you were my counselor.

You were my friend.

We ate meals together, we took sweet counsel together, we walked in the house of God together, but yet you did this to me.

Now, again, the principle I'm trying to get in our hearts and minds here tonight.

It's very, very important that we understand and we see this is the closer the relationship, the greater the potential to be offended.

Now, if I'm walking down the street out here in Kent, Washington, I don't know anybody on the streets of Kent, Washington.

And if somebody yelled across the street at me and said, hey, baldy, how you doing over there?

I'd probably just ignore them.

I don't really care what that person thinks of me.

I don't know them from Adam.

But if I walk through my living room and Debbie says, hey, baldy, how you doing today?

That could be a little bit offensive to me, you know, because I do care what she thinks of me.

Again, that's the principle I'm talking about here tonight.

The closer the relationship, the greater the potential to be offended.

Now, this brings us to this second question.

What happens when we're offended and we don't come to an acknowledgement of that truth?

God gives us a wonderful word picture in scripture in answering this question.

And we see that word picture in Proverbs chapter 18, verse 19.

So look at it there with me.

Proverbs 18.

And verse 19 says this.

A brother offended is harder to be one than a strong city.

And their contentions are like the bars of a castle.

A brother offended is harder to be one than a strong city.

Now, the question comes when we read that verse, what does a strong city look like?

Strong city, back in that day and time was a fortified city.

The cities that's referred to in that verse is a city that has walls up around it.

And reason it has walls up around it is protect those inside the city from the enemy outside of the city.

It has a gate usually in a city or several gates in that city to allow those who are outside the walls of the city that they perceive to be friends of those inside the city to.

To come inside the city.

And they let them in.

Then they close the gate because they want to keep those they don't Want inside the city, outside of these walls, you say preacher, now what is the picture here?

God is, I believe, saying this to us.

He's saying, listen, when someone is offended, they start building these big walls, tall walls around themselves to protect themselves from being further hurt.

And they think they're protecting themselves from being hurt, from those who have hurt them outside these walls of offense that they have built around themselves.

But what they don't realize is at the same time, they're building these walls of protection around themselves.

They're taking themselves prisoner inside of these walls.

One writer says this Some people are like medieval castles.

Their walls keep them safe from being hurt.

They protect themselves emotionally by permitting no exchange of feelings with others.

No one can enter.

They're secure from attack.

However, inspection of the occupant finds him or her lonely, rattling around his or her castle all alone.

The castle dweller is a self made prisoner.

He or she needs to feel loved by someone.

But the walls are so high, it's difficult for them to reach out or for anyone else to be able to reach in.

You see, when you're offended, you cannot give unconditional love to the someone, because unconditional love gives others the right or the access we might say, to hurt us.

First Corinthians 13 says, God's love does not seek its own.

Therefore, when we stay offended, God's love begins to grow cold within us.

Then we become resentful of the one who offended us, the one who has hurt us.

One writer, I think aptly states, resentment is like drinking poison while you're waiting for the other person to die.

No wonder, friends, again I remind you of Jesus words in Luke 17.

No wonder Jesus says, woe unto that person through whom offenses come.

It were better for him that a millstone were hung about his neck, he was cast into the depths of the sea, than he should offend one of my little ones.

And when you become offended or that person becomes offended, it doesn't just affect them, it affects everyone around them.

I remind you what it says in Hebrews chapter 12 and verse 15.

It says, looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God, lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many, many be defiled.

When you're offended, it doesn't just affect you, but it affects all those around you.

In a marriage, it doesn't just affect the husband if he's offended, it affects the wife, it affects the children, it affects the family in a church.

When a brother or sister in Christ gets offended in a Church.

It's like a cancer that can go through that church and affect everybody in that church.

Allowing walls of offense in their life gives place to the devil, as I said, to build strongholds out of those walls.

I remind you of Second Corinthians, chapter 10 and verse 4 and 5, where it says, for the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty.

Through God to the pulling down of what?

Of strongholds.

Casting down imaginations and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ.

You say, preacher, what is a stronghold?

I think a simple definition of a stronghold is a mental habit pattern that is contrary to the will of God.

A mental habit pattern that is contrary to the will of God.

Now you see this definition I know Debbie had up on the screen there.

One writer defines it this way to a stronghold is a mindset impregnated with hopelessness that causes me to accept as unchangeable something that we know, that we know is contrary to the will of God.

I like to picture it.

I think I mentioned it this weekend.

It's kind of like having a scratch in a record.

And many of you remember the old vinyl records where that if you're playing a song and the record gets scratched, that needle will stay in that scratch and just plays that same song, that same tune over and over and over again till you move the needle out of that scratch.

A stronghold is like having a scratch in your heart where that when something triggers it, it automatically defaults to a reaction that is that stronghold that's in your heart.

And being offended, the devil takes that person that's offended captive to do his will through a stronghold of offense.

And notice as we look back to 2nd Corinthians 10, verse 4 and 5, it says in every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, that is a stronghold distorts a true understanding of God.

The person who's offended begins to look and view God incorrectly because they're processing God.

They begin to process God through their stronghold of offense.

I've seen this many times in counseling where I've had a couple, that is a Christian couple, come into my office and they will say things that is very surprising, knowing that they've been going to church for years and years and years.

Things like, I know what the Bible says.

What's the next word?

But, well, we better be careful.

We start saying, I know what the Bible says, but I know what the Bible says about marriage.

I know the Bible says marriage is sacred.

I know the Bible says marriage is holy, but I just want to be happy.

Of course I'm thinking to myself, the only way you'll be happy is to be holy and be obedient to the Word of God.

You're fooling yourself if you think that you can be happy without obeying the word of God and being holy.

But when someone's offended, they began to even filter God and His truth through their walls of offense.

Again, it's no wonder that Jesus says woe unto that person through whom offenses come.

This is serious business with God.

What happens if we don't deal correctly with offense?

You have listened to the first part of a two part message by Evangelist Sam Wood.

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