Recovering from Narcissists with Laura Bytheway - 025
When you've been raised by a narcissist or have been in a long-term relationship with one, odds are you have conditioned yourself to survive the abuse. This is what today’s guest, Laura Bytheway experienced and had to overcome.
Laura Bytheway is the Host of ‘Get Your Self Back' Podcast and a life coach on a mission to help people dealing with narcissists. She is passionate about helping people get themselves back and rebuild themselves from the inside out.
Let’s dive right into this episode and learn more about narcissism and break the dynamic of narcissistic relationships.
[00:01 - 07:29] Opening Segment
I introduce and welcome my friend Laura Bytheway.
Who is Laura?
She explains her last name
Born and raised in New Orleans and lived in Houston
Married with two sons and a daughter on the way
Life coach specialized in helping people recover from a narcissist abusive relationships
Laura shares her story on how she began her career
[07:30 - 16:34] Recovering from Narcissists
Laura shares her experiences dealing with narcissistic people in her pre-coaching life
Grew up in a narcissistic culture
Got her degree in psychology
Realized that people could attract this toxic relationship in their life
The common denominator in all this toxicity could be yourself
Turn your blame to empowerment
Make new decisions in your life
Laura talks about her home situation
Coming from a long line of narcissists
Raised with narcissistic tendencies
There is healing in your inner and outer world
You can forgive and love the narcissist in your life
Without tolerating their abuse
Boundaries = Love
Get to a place to process all of your pain and be done with bitterness.
See the narcissist in your life, not as a monster.
[16:35 - 32:00] Dealing with Narcissism One step of a Time
Deal with hurt, anger, and resentment first
Creating room for compassion, love, and forgiveness
Laura explains Narcissism and the traits
Narcissist believes that love is earned
Narcissists are full of self-hate and deep emptiness
Don’t know how to manage their emotions
Narcissism is also a survival mechanism
Laura explains how to know that you are with a narcissist
They would gaslight you
Make you feel unchanged of their emotions
They can be abusive
Narcissism is more like a disability to put themselves in other’s shoes
They are trying to control other people’s opinions about them
It is hard to see what’s going on most of the time because the survival mechanism for you is kicking in
Narcissists use your insecurity and anxiety
Narcissists have a big tendency to manipulate and lie to everyone surrounding them
Their survival depends on their skills in these areas
[32:01 - 37:44] How to help someone with Narcissism
Laura gives some advice for some people that love or have a relationship with narcissists
Be honest with them but don’t expect to fix everything
If you are seeing children being victimized, it took a different action and approach
Talk to CPS or a lawyer
Children are not able to have consent in that situation
[37:45 - 46:00] De-Silencing your Voice
Laura shares about the time when she feels like she is being silenced
When you are in the narcissistic dynamic, you are being silenced
Could be physical or emotional silence
Being a coach in the narcissist recovery has been its therapy process
Being abused by a narcissist could make you be the source of abuse to yourself
Re-creating the abuse to yourself
De-silencing yourself and say that you are full
Show up and speak up
Silencing comes from fear and anxiety
You can not make everyone happy
Allow people to be angry and respond to what you say
Part of freeing yourself from being silenced has to do with entrepreneurship.
The way of getting up and out of the narcissistic dynamic
[46:00 - 58:49] Closing Segment
What advice would you give to someone that is in a narcissistic relationship?
If it is abusive, get out as fast as possible and get yourself safe
Break the dynamic by taking full responsibility for your own emotions
Learn how to set boundaries and love yourself unconditionally.
Laura talks about her work and her clients.
The victims of narcissists, in the dynamic and trying to get out
People who lost their sense of self and wanting to create a healthy relationship
How to connect with Laura
See Links Below
Laura talks about her Podcast.
Get Your Self Back
Final words from Laura
"To be able to heal from a narcissistic relationship, you have to break the dynamic by taking full responsibility for your own emotion, learn how to set boundaries and love yourself unconditionally.” - Laura Bytheway
"Being abused by a narcissist could make you be the source of abuse to yourself.” - Laura Bytheway
“If you are in a narcissistic relationship and If it is abusive, get out as fast as possible and get yourself safe.” - Laura Bytheway
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