You told yourself you'd say no this time. But when they asked, you said yes anyway. Again.

This is a continuation of part three of the Beyond Awareness series that was aired on Tuesday. Today, we're journaling through what you're actually afraid will happen if you say no.

You're not saying yes because you want to help. You're saying yes because you think saying no means something about who you are as a person.

Journaling Prompts:

1. Think about something you recently said yes to that you didn’t actually want to do. What was it? Why did you say yes? What did saying yes give you in that moment? Did it make you feel needed, helpful, like a good person, like a team player?

2. Imagine you had said no. Walk through what you think would have happened. Would they have been disappointed? Would they have thought less of you? Would you have felt selfish or guilty? What is the worst case scenario your brain was trying to avoid?

3. If you weren’t the one everyone could count on. If you weren’t the person who always said yes and showed up… If you chose yourself and said no confidently…What would that mean about you? Would people still like you?Would you still be a good leader, mom, partner, friend? Would you still be worthy of your success?

4. What would you need to believe about yourself or trust about your relationships to say no without guilt? Finish this sentence: I’m allowed to say no to ______ without it meaning ______.

If you notice that you’ve been saying yes to prove you’re kind, capable, or worthy, that’s the belief that needs to shift.

Work with me:

1. Breakthrough Intensive - You already know you should slow down, delegate more, stop overcommitting & be emotionally present. So why can't you? That's what we figure out in 90 minutes + integration call 2 weeks later. Book your Breakthrough
2. Exhale: Private Coaching - For women ready to do this work until it sticks and you can't revert back. 4 open spots: Work with me
3. Free Calm Mind Blueprint: http://www.samanthapenkoff.com/calm-mind-pod

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When your team, partner, or kids ask you for something, do you ever think, don't want to let them down, even when you're already drowning yourself? We are in part three of the Beyond Awareness series. And on Tuesday, we broke down why you keep saying yes, even when you want to say no, why you are overcommitted and resentful, and why those boundary scripts and just say no.

more often advice hasn't actually helped you stop people pleasing. And today we are doing strategic journaling so that you can figure out what you're actually getting from saying yes and what you're afraid of losing if you say no. So let's dive in and real quick, all of these prompts are in the show notes. So if you are driving or you just can't write right now, just save this episode and you can come back to it later.

All right, let's jump in.

Prompt number one. Think about something that you've recently said yes to that you didn't actually want to do. What was it and why did you say yes? What did saying yes give you in that moment? Did it make you feel needed, helpful, like a good person, like a team player, right, whatever comes up?

Now imagine you had said no to that request. Walk through what you think would have happened. Would they have been disappointed? Would they have thought less of you? Would they have stopped asking you for things? Would you have felt selfish or guilty? What is the worst case scenario that your brain was trying to avoid by saying yes?

Prompt 3. If you weren't the type of person that everyone could count on, if you weren't the one who always said yes and helped and showed up, if you were the person who chose herself and said no confidently even when it meant someone else would be put out and had to find somebody else, what would that mean about you? Would people still like you?

Would you still be a good leader, a good mom, a good friend? Would you still be worthy of your success? Write whatever comes up for you.

Prompt four, what would you need to believe about yourself or trust about your relationships to actually say no without guilt? What permission slip do you need to give yourself?

if it helps, finish this sentence. I'm allowed to say no to... blank without it meaning blank.

Amazing job. If these prompts showed you that you've been saying yes to prove that you are kind or good or worthy of your title, not because you actually want to help, that is the belief that needs to shift. And by now, you know that you can't solve that with better boundary scripts or practicing saying no in the mirror. So if you want to continue to untangle your worth from your helpfulness,

Download the Call Mine Blueprint at the link in the show notes. It's free. And that will help you to journal through this more so that you can say yes when you mean it and saying no without the guilt spiral.

And if you've listened to all three parts of this series, first of all, thank you so much. And second, if you're thinking, okay, I know what patterns I'm stuck in, I just can't figure out how to shift the belief. Like what is the next step? That is what my breakthrough intensives are for. They are 90 minutes to dig into your specific version of these beliefs and ripple effect of how it's actually impacting you.

There's no more guessing of why more discipline and more systems isn't helping you get more done. And there's no more trying the same solutions over and over that haven't worked. It's just you and me and these root beliefs which get me smiling but have been so hurtful to your nervous system that we will dismantle. It's a combination of strategic mindset work combined with tangible action steps so that you don't just get these

aha, feel good feelings from all the mindset work and all that, but you end with actual steps to take action, to create the life that you want. But if that feels too big, to feel how you want to feel in your daily life. details for that in the show notes. Thank you so much for being here for this entire series, and I will see you next week for a brand new episode.