Join Host Bree Carlile as she reads the fourteenth chapter of Adventures of Huckleberry Finn.

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Today we'll be continuing Adventures of Huckleberry.

Finn by Mark Twain.

Chapter 14 by and by when we got up, we turned over the truck the gang had stole off of the wreck and found boots and blankets and clothes and all sorts of other things.

And a lot of books and a spy glass and three boxes of cigars.

We hadn't ever been this rich before, in neither of our lives.

The cigars was prime.

We laid off all the afternoon in the woods talking and me reading the books and having a general good time.

I told Jim all about what happened inside the wreck and at the ferry boat, and I said these kinds of things was adventures.

But he said he didn't want no more adventures.

He said that when I went in the Texas and he called back to get on the raft and found her gone.

He nearly died because he judged it was all up with him anyway it could be fixed, for if he didn't get saved, he would get drowned.

And if he did get saved, whoever saved him would send him back home so as to get the reward and then Miss Watson would sell him south.

Sure.

Well, he was right.

He was most always right.

He had an uncommon level head for a servant.

I read considerable to Jim about kings and dukes and earls and such, and how gaudy they dressed and how much style they put on and called each other your Majesty and your Grace and your Lordship and so on, instead of mister.

And Jim's eyes bugged out.

And he was interested, he says, I didn't know there was so many in them.

I ain't heard about none of them scarcely.

But old King Solomon, unless you count dim kings that's in a packaged yards.

How much do a king get?

I says.

Why, they get $1,000 a month if they want it.

They can have just as much as they want.

Everything belongs to them.

Ain't that gay?

And what they got to do, huck, they don't do nothing.

Why, how you talk.

They just set around no.

Is that so?

Of course it is.

They just set around.

Except maybe when there's a war, then they go to war.

But other times they just lazy around or go hawking, just hawking and shh.

Do you hear that noise?

We skipped out and looked, but it weren't nothing but the flutter of a steamboat's wheel away down coming around the point.

So we come back.

Yes, says I, and other times when things is dull, they fuss with the parliament.

And if everybody don't just go so, he whacks their heads off.

But mostly they hang round to the harem.

Round a witch harem.

What's the harem?

The place where he keeps his wives.

Don't you know about the harem?

Solomon had one.

He had a million wives.

Why, yes, that so I I done forgot.

It a harem's a bolden house, I reckon most likely they has rackety times in the nursery, and I reckon the wives quarrels considerable and that creased a racket.

Yet they say Solomon de wises men ever live.

I don't take no stock in debt, because why would a wise man want to live in Demids as such a blem and blaming all the time?

No, Dee Dee wouldn't.

A wise man had taken built a builtive factory and then he could s*** down to biller factory when he wants to rest.

Well, but he was the wisest man anyway, because the widow, she told me so her own self.

I don't care what the widows say, he weren't no wise man.

Another, he had summer the DoD fetchinous ways I ever seen.

Does you know about that child that he is going to chop in, too?

Yes, the widow told me all about it.

Well, then, weren't that the beatenist notion in the world.

You just take and look at it a minute.

That's the stumb DA.

That's one of the woman HEZ you.

That's the other one, Solomon, and dish a dollar bills the child, both of you claims it.

What does I do?

Does I shin around monster neighbors and find out which on you to build to bong to and hidden it over the right one and safe and sound.

Do I doubt anybody that any gumption would?

No, I take and whack the bill in two and give half unto you and the other half to the other woman.

That's the way Solomon was going to do with a child.

Now, I want to ask you, what's the use of the half?

A bill can't buy nothing with it.

And what is use of half a child?

I wouldn't give a durn for a million in them.

But hang it, Jim, you've clean missed the point.

Blame it.

You've missed it a thousand mile.

Who, me?

Go long.

Don't talk to me about your pints.

I reckon I know sense when I seize it and ain't no sense in such doings as that dispute warns about half a child.

Dispute was about a whole child.

And a man who thinks he can settle a spew about a whole child with a hatchild don't know enough to come in out of the rain.

Don't talk to me about Solomon, Huck.

I know him by the back.

But I tell you, you don't get the point.

Blame the point.

I reckon I knows what I knows.

And mind you, the real pent is further.

It's down, deeper it lays in the way Solomon was raised.

You take a man that's going only one or two chillin it.

That man going to be a waste of chillin.

No, he ain't.

He can't afford it.

He knows how to value him.

But you take a man that's got about 5 million chillin running around the house and is different, he as soon as a chop a child and two as a cat dates plenty more.

A child or two more or less weren't no consequence to Solomon dad thatchem I never see such a servant.

If he got a notion in his head once, there weren't no getting it out again.

He was the most down on Solomon of any servant I'd ever see.

So I went to talking about other kings and let Solomon slide.

I told about Louis 16 that got his head cut off in France long time ago.

And about his little boy, the dolphin.

That would have been a king.

But they took and shut him up in jail and some say he died there, poor Lil Chap.

But some says he got out and got away and come to America.

That's good.

But he'll be pooty lonesome.

They ain't no kings here, is they, Huck?

No, he can't get no situation.

What's he going to do?

Well, I don't know.

Some of them gets on the police and some of them learns people how to talk French.

Why Hug, knowing the French, people talk the same way we does?

No, Jim, you couldn't understand a word they said.

Not a single word.

Well, now, I'd be ding busted.

How do that come?

I don't know, but it's so.

I got some of their jabber out of a book.

Suppose a man was to come to you and say, Polyfoo frenzy.

What would you think?

I would think nothing.

I'd take and bust him over the head.

That is, if he weren't white, I wouldn't lo no servant to call me dad.

Shucks.

It ain't calling you anything.

It's only saying, do you know how to talk French?

Why, then why couldn't he say it?

Why, he is a saying it.

That's a Frenchman's way of saying it.

Well, it's a blame, ridiculous way, and I don't want to hear no more about it.

There ain't no sense in it.

Looky here, Jim.

Does a cat talk like we do?

No, a cat don't.

Well, does a cow?

No, a cow don't.

Other.

Does a cat talk like a cow or a cow talk like a cat?

No, they don't.

It's natural and right for them to talk different from each other, ain't it?

Course.

And ain't it natural and right for a cat and a cow to talk different from us?

Why, most surely it is.

Well, then why ain't it natural and right for a Frenchman to talk different from us?

You answer me that.

Is a cat a man hook?

No.

Well, then there ain't no sense in a cat talking like a man.

Is a cow a man?

Or is a cow a cat?

No, she ain't either of them.

Weldon she ain't got no business to talk like either one or the other of them.

Is a Frenchman a man?

Yes, weldon dad blame it.

Why don't he talk like a man?

You answer me, dad.

I see it weren't no use wasting words.

You can't learn a servant to argue, so I quit.

Thank you for joining Bite at a.

Time books today while we read a bite of one of your favorite classics.

Again, my name is Brie Carlyle, and I hope you come back tomorrow for the next bite of Adventures of Huckleberry Finn.

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Take a look in the broken.

Let's see what we can find.

Take it chapter by chapter, one at a time.

So many adventures and mountains we can climb.

Take it word for word, line by line, one bite at a time.