Shownotes
We're talking about Supernatural, Season Six, Episode Twelve, "Like a Virgin" hey! But we know its all about dragons, and how much do you know about dragons? Play along in "Dragon Ditties"
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Transcripts
Jerk:
Welcome to this week's episode of Devil's Trap podcast. I'm Diana.
Bitch:
And I'm Liz.
Jerk:
And this week we're gonna talk about season six, episode 12.
Bitch:
Like a virgin Ayyyyy
Jerk:
touch for the
Bitch:
For
Jerk:
very
Bitch:
the very
Jerk:
first
Bitch:
first
Jerk:
time.
Bitch:
time
Jerk:
All right. Yeah, there we go.
Bitch:
I wish I had on some fingerless gloves right now. I just can go in the next room and get
Jerk:
I
Bitch:
some
Jerk:
say
Bitch:
out
Jerk:
you
Bitch:
of the drawer.
Jerk:
own some!
Bitch:
Like, of course I own finger. Yeah.
Jerk:
I know.
Bitch:
So I'm just surprised I'm not wearing them right now, but they don't go with my t-shirts. So.
Jerk:
Reasonable. So what are you up to Liz?
Bitch:
you know, and just learning how to be a better criminal. So, you know, I'm also just starting to feel like, and maybe it's because I read a lot of mythology, like I'm one of those terrible Greek figures that has to like go through like trials, but they're just like the stupidest trials that like have ever been created. And so this weekend, my trials included, what do you do if an electronic gate. All of us is closed and your quicker doesn't work. How
Jerk:
Have fun.
Bitch:
do you manually open a giant electronic gate? The answer is clearly on YouTube, which I should have done for the first part, because like I called like my brother and he was like, oh, you have to like pull this thing and I was like, what? And then my mom was like, we must find a man. Cause that's where I answered everything. So we drove down to the neighbor's house. I'm like, well, their gate's shut. I don't know if they're home. I don't give a shit. I don't want to talk to people. I just did that to make my mom happy. and like, back out to the gate and then finally it was like, I'm just going to YouTube this shit. I'm like, ah, that's what you mean. And yeah, it's stupid easy to break into. I had no idea. I thought it was maybe they just like, don't tell anybody how stupid easy it is. Nobody does it. But holy shit, once I figured that out, that took me like point five seconds. So.
Jerk:
Yay, security.
Bitch:
Yeah, security. And I also learned about you manually opening electric garage doors that no longer work. And then that if you do that, they're probably a lot lighter than you think they are. So you should be careful about how hard you push them when they go up, because they will bounce back and all the grossness that's on the bottom of that garage door will fall on top of your head. It was real gross. So I learned that. So I've
Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
learned some lessons this week and I'm good.
Jerk:
You're
Bitch:
I'm
Jerk:
lessened
Bitch:
learning.
Jerk:
up.
Bitch:
Yep. I feel like I should pass like whatever trial that is. Like, do I get something like a belt
Jerk:
I mean,
Bitch:
patch?
Jerk:
it's like two different types of gates that you successfully
Bitch:
Right?
Jerk:
traversed.
Bitch:
Like there should be like some prophecy about like the Scarlet,
Jerk:
The two
Bitch:
you know,
Jerk:
gates.
Bitch:
the Scarlet woman crosses the gates of the beast or something, you know.
Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
There you go. That can be part of my cult. All right.
Jerk:
Thanks for watching!
Bitch:
It has been foretold. So what about you?
Jerk:
So we went and saw Renfield, first of all, which I don't go to the movies a lot, like I enjoy movies and things, but I just don't go
Bitch:
Who does?
Jerk:
a lot.
Bitch:
No
Jerk:
Well,
Bitch:
one goes very often anymore.
Jerk:
some people do, so we're gonna do
Bitch:
Well,
Jerk:
it.
Bitch:
and I'm jealous of those people. They have better lives than I do.
Jerk:
Well, it was deeply enjoyable. So, yeah, strong recommend. I really loved it. But I also am reminded what a goddamn genius Nicolas Cage is. I don't care what people say. And then.
Bitch:
And also, how did you accessorize?
Jerk:
Of course I wore my vampire teeth because how often do you get to pop in your your your silver vampire grill? In my daily life not very often so you take every excuse you can.
Bitch:
You should, you should.
Jerk:
So yeah.
Bitch:
Carpe, Carpe, Vampire Girl.
Jerk:
Yeah, sure. Carpe Fang. Um, oh, yeah,
Bitch:
Hehehehe.
Jerk:
terrible. So now and then I'm actually got out and about in deep Elm for a little bit this weekend in Dallas. I went and had some nice afternoon beers at three links and saw Jarrett Ray Reddick of bowling for soup do his country set, which I thoroughly enjoyed and had some good good eats. And yeah, that's about it. Oh, not pretty laid back weekend. I
Bitch:
That's a lot of things. Just listening
Jerk:
say
Bitch:
to
Jerk:
that
Bitch:
that,
Jerk:
there
Bitch:
I'm
Jerk:
was
Bitch:
like,
Jerk:
a lot of
Bitch:
oh
Jerk:
things.
Bitch:
my
Jerk:
I
Bitch:
God,
Jerk:
was like,
Bitch:
I'm
Jerk:
I
Bitch:
fucking
Jerk:
was
Bitch:
exhausted.
Jerk:
about to say like,
Bitch:
And I
Jerk:
and
Bitch:
also know
Jerk:
also,
Bitch:
there are things you didn't list.
Jerk:
yeah, they did. I did. I was like, oh, yeah, no way. It wasn't laid back. And then I also went and cheered for my niece at her cheerleading competition. And they got second place. Yay. Go, Edison.
Bitch:
Did the voodoo queens win?
Jerk:
No,
Bitch:
Oh, I really
Jerk:
there
Bitch:
hope
Jerk:
was
Bitch:
they
Jerk:
a team
Bitch:
would have
Jerk:
called
Bitch:
won.
Jerk:
the there
Bitch:
And there
Jerk:
was
Bitch:
was
Jerk:
a team
Bitch:
like,
Jerk:
called the Vida Queens.
Bitch:
yeah, and there was like outside, they were just like actually like doing voodoo to like Wayne and like they were just like chicken feet that were like, people kept finding them like underneath
Jerk:
They're
Bitch:
like girls
Jerk:
throwing
Bitch:
ponytails
Jerk:
them.
Bitch:
and shit.
Jerk:
No, unfortunately not.
Bitch:
A little
Jerk:
But
Bitch:
like
Jerk:
yeah,
Bitch:
green,
Jerk:
so.
Bitch:
green bags everywhere. And just like, oh, just as
Jerk:
Uh.
Bitch:
a little cheerleader is just tripping on everything and just like falling down.
Jerk:
Now, unfortunately, for your vision, that is not what happened.
Bitch:
for my version of bringing on New Orleans.
Jerk:
New Orleans edition. There we go.
Bitch:
Netflix make it happen.
Jerk:
And then I was super excited. Like all I've been counting down to was watching the stupid Love is Blind live reunion because Netflix made a big deal about how they were doing this live reunion. And yes, I like Love is Blind because I'm a dork and I like garbage television sometimes. It's OK. And then fucking I play my whole Sunday evening around this. Got all my shit done, showered, chillin, eat all the good. Got my glass of wine in my stupid metal goblet like they use on the fucking show. And it's delayed by five minutes. No one knew what was going on. They came out and said it'd be 15 minutes Okay, fine. We're running 20 minutes late. It happens
Bitch:
So what are they doing like while this is like on what's being shown?
Jerk:
Nothing you could not like Netflix was crashing like people could not get in you would get the error screen on your Netflix
Bitch:
So Netflix itself was crashing.
Jerk:
That's what they like. If you went to the show, what would pop up on your screen would be the thing that says, sorry, we're not able to play this right now. Try again later
Bitch:
Okay,
Jerk:
or whatever.
Bitch:
okay.
Jerk:
That was all that would pop up. And then...
Bitch:
So it wasn't like an empty studio with like just like a chair open and nobody sitting in there. Okay.
Jerk:
Mm hmm. No, because then like some of the people that cast were on their like Instagram live, like, sorry, we're late, guys. We're trying to figure it out. Oh, we broke the Internet. Oh, like that kind of shit. So and I read
Bitch:
Mmm.
Jerk:
online and I'm like following like an Instagram live like feed while this was like from the show. And at one point, there was one hundred and ninety thousand people on the same Instagram live feed that I was watching. And it's like just trying to figure out what the fuck was happening. It was. Kind of weird, honestly, like looking back on like, this is kind of crazy. And like all these brands were popping in, like Gold Star to Cheesecake Factory and MTV's social media teams. Y'all were on fucking point on there. But then there was a few others in there too. It was pretty funny, honestly. Honestly, like all you could do is laugh. But then an hour and a half later, hour and a half after it was supposed to start, Netflix is like, sorry guys, can't do it. We'll just record it and drop it. So Netflix has proven that they are not capable of doing a live stream apparently. There we
Bitch:
Oh, somebody
Jerk:
go.
Bitch:
got fired.
Jerk:
And then I watched it and it was fucking boring. Sorry if you liked it. I thought it was a total let down of a reunion episode. I like was so stoked to watch it on my Monday night. And I like half paid attention because I was so bored. That's how I feel about it. So
Bitch:
I'm
Jerk:
love
Bitch:
very
Jerk:
is blind
Bitch:
sorry
Jerk:
reunion,
Bitch:
for
Jerk:
let
Bitch:
your.
Jerk:
me down.
Bitch:
I'm very sorry for your loss.
Jerk:
Thanks. It was several hours of my life.
Bitch:
That that was that was a thing. And but you were part of a weird movement about
Jerk:
I was
Bitch:
something
Jerk:
so
Bitch:
very shitty, which,
Jerk:
dumb.
Bitch:
you
Jerk:
And
Bitch:
know, is
Jerk:
stupid.
Bitch:
just a sign of like our times right now that people
Jerk:
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Bitch:
just need something that shitty. And they're like, this is all I had. This is all I had this weekend was this stupid love is blind reunion. And you fucked it up. Netflix fucked it up.
Jerk:
Yeah, fucked it up. So anyway, so that's my that's my other update. So with that, I'll move on. So, yeah, that's where we go.
Bitch:
Okay, so let's jump into this week's episode after
Jerk:
Yes.
Bitch:
after. Yes, which was unlike Diana's unfortunate love is blind. Fiasco was actually an enjoyable episode. And
Jerk:
Yes.
Bitch:
nd,:Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
in a tiny plane in a storm. Nope.
Jerk:
Oh, I am going to touch on the recap from this episode real fast before
Bitch:
Okay.
Jerk:
we get to the tiny plane. First off, I thought was interesting, because, you know, we we left off with death shoving Sam's soul back into him at the end of the last episode. And this episode, we've got the beginning, the recap. We've got a lot of Sam action. And then we've also got back in the saddle by Aerosmith playing. That was interesting. So a little bit of.
Bitch:
Nice little nice little
Jerk:
You know,
Bitch:
lead up.
Jerk:
yeah, so yeah, so we were in a tiny plane and giant thunderstorm.
Bitch:
Mm-mm.
Jerk:
And
Bitch:
Mm-mm.
Jerk:
shoot,
Bitch:
And
Jerk:
it's
Bitch:
yeah,
Jerk:
gone.
Bitch:
this dude's like, I didn't think we would run into any weather. What? What, motherfucker? That storm, that's not like a oh, I popped
Jerk:
That's not
Bitch:
up
Jerk:
called
Bitch:
storm.
Jerk:
a pop storm. No, that's a big storm. And so the girl is just, the young woman is like freaking out. She just wants to land, but then she sees something fly by. What?
Bitch:
Nope, nope.
Jerk:
And he's like, no, no, it's fine. Just like relax, lay back and close your eyes. It'll be okay. We'll land soon.
Bitch:
Yeah, I think it's like as soon as like some dude tells you to relax and shut close your eyes and think of England and then he disappears just shows why you should never close your eyes and relax. There is a time to be tense.
Jerk:
Did you say you should never close your eyes and relax?
Bitch:
Well, in such crisis situations, I'm just like that is that that's a
Jerk:
Okay.
Bitch:
pretty much a
Jerk:
Okay.
Bitch:
layback and let it OK, I'm going to say that.
Jerk:
Nope.
Bitch:
But it's just like, you know, it's. I don't know, like I don't want to relax in that moment and wait for it to happen. I want to be tense.
Jerk:
Well, it doesn't I mean, she she she gets that wish, I guess, because she hears a glass break and he's gone and the freaking plane crashes. While she's screaming. So.
Bitch:
Yep, alone on the plane. Yeah, yeah. Mm-mm.
Jerk:
Yeah, that's
Bitch:
Nope.
Jerk:
upsetting. So we are back at Bobby's bunker. Castiel is checking on Sam. But as he notes, he is not a human doctor. Uh.
Bitch:
he's walking out and he's rolling up his sleeves like he just like fisted a cow. Like it just looks like you know, a vet coming out like and just after like rolling down like well, ain't nothing she ain't gonna birth that one like is not breached. Yeah, well
Jerk:
Well, didn't
Bitch:
he
Jerk:
he have to like, didn't he have to like diaphragm
Bitch:
was he was fisting
Jerk:
fist him
Bitch:
him
Jerk:
through
Bitch:
to like figure out if he had a soul
Jerk:
his
Bitch:
I guess.
Jerk:
stomach fist? I don't know. Soul fisting? I don't know.
Bitch:
That's so Fiston.
Jerk:
Not to be mistaken for soul cycle. Yeah, so but.
Bitch:
SoulCycle after dark.
Jerk:
So Dean's like trying to ask Cassio questions are like, is yeah. So, yes, his soul's there, but he's like, well, is he going to wake up? And Cassio's like kind of like
Bitch:
Ha ha!
Jerk:
gives Dean some shit. Like, like, I don't
Bitch:
Yeah, it's a difficult
Jerk:
know.
Bitch:
time in the relationship. Cass seems stressed.
Jerk:
Yeah, and he is not stoked about this. And he goes off, he like kind of goes off again about how Dean should not have put the soul back into Sam.
Bitch:
And he does say that, you know, when he touched it, it felt like you touched it. It felt like it had been skinned alive. But I'm like, how was a blob? I still don't understand this because it's like every time they show a soul. It's like this like glowy blob.
Jerk:
Balling glow of light. Balling glow
Bitch:
How do
Jerk:
of
Bitch:
you
Jerk:
light
Bitch:
skin?
Jerk:
is what I said. Glowing ball of light is what I meant to say.
Bitch:
a balling blow of light. I
Jerk:
Balling.
Bitch:
think it's like this is going to turn on things like month with my Amazon Alexa. So
Jerk:
Oh,
Bitch:
like, but anyways, yeah, it's just it's a weird thing, right? But he's just like, it's gross. Like you shouldn't have like put that inside of him. It's icky. He's
Jerk:
But
Bitch:
unclean.
Jerk:
the worst thing he says is after that though. He says, if you wanted to kill your brother, you should have done it outright. Dang.
Bitch:
Meh.
Jerk:
No?
Bitch:
Yeah, I'm just like, whatever. I just because I feel like like I've and also I think it probably comes from watching the show so many times, but the whole like shouldn't put the soul and Sam like that argument after a while, I'm just like, yeah, whatever. You shouldn't put the soul in Sam
Jerk:
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Bitch:
or like it's gross or just like, yeah, he's got a gross soul. We know it. And I'm also just kind of sad because that means soul is Sam is gone.
Jerk:
Oh,
Bitch:
But so
Jerk:
that's all
Bitch:
what
Jerk:
the Sam
Bitch:
we.
Jerk:
turned mean. So we've got
Bitch:
Yeah,
Jerk:
Dean
Bitch:
I know.
Jerk:
and Bobby
Bitch:
He went,
Jerk:
go
Bitch:
he
Jerk:
have
Bitch:
went
Jerk:
a drink.
Bitch:
out like Menendez, but you know,
Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
so we get sick. But yeah, Bobby and Dean are drinking and Bobby says a very, very awesome line. And he says, like my daddy always said, just because it kills your liver, don't mean it ain't medicine.
Jerk:
Thanks for watching! Huh!
Bitch:
And that should be like, I think probably like on a plaque, like above a fireplace in
Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
a really shitty bar.
Jerk:
Or at a bar, yeah, at a bar. I was gonna say at
Bitch:
Is
Jerk:
the bar.
Bitch:
that in my house? No.
Jerk:
Um,
Bitch:
Or on a tombstone maybe.
Jerk:
yeah, both. I don't know. So Bobby has a news clip in front of him and Dean catches, catches, you know, catches his eye and he's like, Hey, it's a job. And so Bobby tells him about a pilot that was found, uh, flambéed. And the plane itself was found 17 miles away and his female passenger was missing.
Bitch:
And Dean basically does the, you had my curiosity, now you have my intention phase.
Jerk:
Mm
Bitch:
But someone's awake.
Jerk:
hmm. What? Sam? Oh, no, he's up. And he hugs Dean and he hugs Bobby and.
Bitch:
It's so awkward. Like
Jerk:
It's
Bitch:
the Bobby
Jerk:
real
Bitch:
hug
Jerk:
awkward.
Bitch:
is
Jerk:
Yeah,
Bitch:
real awkward. The
Jerk:
but
Bitch:
Dean
Jerk:
he's like.
Bitch:
hug looks real sincere.
Jerk:
It does. But yeah, so he's just like, but basically Sam relays that last thing he remembers was, well, he remembers Lucifer snapping Bobby's neck and. Is shocked that Castiel is alive. So that's what he remembers is back there, but he's but he hungry so they're gonna go feed him
Bitch:
I'm hungry.
Jerk:
Hungry yeah, so he doesn't remember anything for the past year and a half
Bitch:
e. Can I do that back to like:Jerk:
That's
Bitch:
or
Jerk:
over
Bitch:
two years.
Jerk:
a decade.
Bitch:
Yeah!
Jerk:
Oh my gosh.
Bitch:
Think of how much like less anxiety I would have
Jerk:
Ah, well, he doesn't remember anything. And Dean, like just insisted, like, everything's all good. There's no weird deals about bringing you back. That's it.
Bitch:
I like that Bobby pretty much expresses what we are all thinking and he just rolls his fucking eyes.
Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
He's just like, have you not learned?
Jerk:
No.
Bitch:
You just, you never learn, do
Jerk:
Never
Bitch:
you?
Jerk:
learned.
Bitch:
You never learn. Okay, fine, you just lie to him again, because that's gonna end well. Cool.
Jerk:
Mm hmm. Yeah. So Bobby's out working on a car and so Dean's out talking to him and Bobby's like, look,
Bitch:
You
Jerk:
I'm well,
Bitch:
need more beer because that's
Jerk:
well,
Bitch:
what you need when you're underneath a car. You need
Jerk:
yeah,
Bitch:
more beer.
Jerk:
looks like a really good lift. He's fine. Um, and Bobby's just glad he's like, I'm glad Sam's better, but I'm, I'm not real sure that everything's erased. I mean, you gotta keep in mind that Sam just tried to kill his ass. So, um, but they don't want to like, crack the wall, like Dean's like, I don't wanna crack the wall, I don't wanna look a gift horse in the mouth. This is the best possible way, but this is like he said, Bobby is like, this is still dumb, he's going to find out, we must tell him and he'd rather hear
Bitch:
I
Jerk:
it
Bitch:
don't
Jerk:
from us.
Bitch:
yeah, I don't understand why you couldn't say like to me, like, I wouldn't tell the whole truth. I wouldn't
Jerk:
No!
Bitch:
be like, you try to kill Bobby, but I, because especially like if you've got a wall in there, you don't want them to scratch. I would want him to know. And I'd be like, Hey,
Jerk:
Yeah, because
Bitch:
here's
Jerk:
you'll reduce
Bitch:
a deer
Jerk:
the confusion
Bitch:
do.
Jerk:
because he
Bitch:
And
Jerk:
won't
Bitch:
you
Jerk:
want
Bitch:
can say,
Jerk:
to scratch
Bitch:
look,
Jerk:
the wall.
Bitch:
look, man, like you didn't have soul. We got a soul back in. You don't want to know what you did. Like we can talk about it, but you don't want to know. And like, look, like it's really shitty. Don't go after the hell piece. You know, like, and then he's not like, to me that solves so much of problems right there. That, that took me what? 30 seconds to say.
Jerk:
And you could even let go a little more in depth if you needed to, just to really keep him out of it. But like, look, I would tell you more, but I know you're going to dig deeper. And here's the here's the high points. Here's the big stuff, you know, and then like leave it at that.
Bitch:
Yeah,
Jerk:
Like
Bitch:
but
Jerk:
Samuel,
Bitch:
now
Jerk:
Samuel,
Bitch:
you made it all like a
Jerk:
like
Bitch:
bigger
Jerk:
Samuel
Bitch:
deal.
Jerk:
Campbell's
Bitch:
Yeah.
Jerk:
real fucking creepy. Stay away from him if you see him. Like, you
Bitch:
It's
Jerk:
know,
Bitch:
like you
Jerk:
like.
Bitch:
need to worm him, Bill Samuel.
Jerk:
There's things, there's things.
Bitch:
Yeah,
Jerk:
So
Bitch:
you went to
Jerk:
yeah,
Bitch:
monster
Jerk:
I mean,
Bitch:
prison.
Jerk:
I mean, he probably wants to hear about monster prisons.
Bitch:
You
Jerk:
Everybody
Bitch:
fucked
Jerk:
wants to
Bitch:
a
Jerk:
hear
Bitch:
hippie.
Jerk:
about. Uh, so anyways, he's just, Bobby points out that when Sam finds out that they're, that they've been, you know, withholding stuff, it's, it's not, it ain't going to be cute.
Bitch:
It ain't gonna be cute. It ain't gonna be like this. It's just not. Nobody likes to be in gaslit. I just don't.
Jerk:
Mm-mm. Mm-mm. So Bobby and Dean are going to go out on this job. But Sam wakes up and insists he wants to go along. So.
Bitch:
I wanna go on a hunt guys! I'm all back, I'm all
Jerk:
Mm-hmm.
Bitch:
happy and fine, let me go on a hunt! Yeah!
Jerk:
Yes. So Bobby says stay back and let the boys go. Hmm.
Bitch:
Yeah, because you don't want to be in a car with Sam because it's awkward. And like, and Sam can smell like the Bobby's trying to stay away from me. Cause you can always tell. And like sometimes like if you have ADHD, like you get over sensitive to that and you think your friends are like, just don't like you, you know, if it's not true. But for Sam case, like this is, you know, you're right, Sam. He's, he's avoiding you.
Jerk:
Yes. And Sam's kind of confused by it and asked Dean and Dean makes up the excuse of one part age and three parts liquor. Okay.
Bitch:
Fair, though, I mean fair.
Jerk:
So they're in, they're in, they're in, um, driving into Portland where this is all going down and Sam's on the phone with the police and we've got a new day, uh, a new day yesterday by Jethro Tull on the radio. Um, and apparently there's been two other young females that have been disappeared in town too.
Bitch:
Yeah. And he has just slipped right back into detective Sam. He's
Jerk:
Totally.
Bitch:
just like, I've got my, I've got my monocle or my magnifying glass, whatever detectives have. And
Jerk:
Floppy
Bitch:
he's,
Jerk:
hat thing.
Bitch:
he's got his little hat on the deer hunter hat. Is that what we learned? I don't know what
Jerk:
Something
Bitch:
it's called
Jerk:
like that. I don't
Bitch:
anyway.
Jerk:
know.
Bitch:
So, but yeah, we, we got young and female, which, you know, Hey, Dean didn't make a gross joke.
Jerk:
Oh, you're
Bitch:
Yay.
Jerk:
right. Go
Bitch:
Growth.
Jerk:
Dean. But so that but Sam starts to kind of ask questions of Dean at this point, though, about like, so what you didn't even try to go live your life while I was gone for a year and a half. I mean, that's you kind of promised that you would. And Dean plays it off at first. But like eventually does spill that he was with Lisa and Ben for a year, but it didn't work out.
Bitch:
Yeah, I mean, so at least like he says, like something of what he did,
Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
something, but then
Jerk:
Something.
Bitch:
also it's just like, hey, listen to this song. Only a lot louder than I had it on. La la la la la la. I really like this chorus, which
Jerk:
Huh!
Bitch:
is a great technique when you want people to shut the fuck up in the car. Just turn that music up.
Jerk:
Uh, yeah. So we cut to a young woman's house and this is Penny, our victim from the plane crash. It's her sister. And we've got Sam and Dean in suits doing their undercover shit. And they
Bitch:
Yeah, and
Jerk:
fight.
Bitch:
Penny looks like she has Portland written all over her. I mean, she doesn't look like she smells like
Jerk:
The
Bitch:
some
Jerk:
sister,
Bitch:
of the Portland
Jerk:
the
Bitch:
people.
Jerk:
sister, Penny's
Bitch:
Yeah, but
Jerk:
sister.
Bitch:
the sister does, but the sister looks like super Portland.
Jerk:
Yeah, Penny's room is very pink for a adult woman. And I'm not judging having a
Bitch:
a
Jerk:
pink
Bitch:
child.
Jerk:
room.
Bitch:
It's very
Jerk:
I'm saying
Bitch:
pink for
Jerk:
this
Bitch:
anybody.
Jerk:
is very little, like
Bitch:
That was very
Jerk:
ruffles
Bitch:
pink for Dolly
Jerk:
and
Bitch:
Parton.
Jerk:
lace and baby
Bitch:
That
Jerk:
pink.
Bitch:
was very pink for Barbie. That was just very, very, that was very pink for Sweet Valley High Beth.
Jerk:
It was very innocent for an adult female.
Bitch:
Yes.
Jerk:
Um, and the sister explains that her, that Penny was not an adventurous person. She really only went on that plane for Stan because she really liked Stan. It was her pilot date.
Bitch:
you Stan.
Jerk:
Ah!
Bitch:
You were right, you should have gone on that thing. You had thoughts. But we go from the pink room to a wonderful, wonderful Portland motel room that makes me feel a warm and cozy inside. And it makes it's like the type of room that goes Oh, Pacific Northwest. You seem so nice. Not like you seem like really depressing and like I don't want to be here. But it looks so nice. We see it this way. Like I want to go to Forks. I could look for vampires, you know, like.
Jerk:
I wanna go to Forks.
Bitch:
We can get forks.
Jerk:
All
Bitch:
So
Jerk:
right.
Bitch:
anyways, this is how this I love this motel room. It's just cozy.
Jerk:
Well, Sam is doing research and Dean walks in with like burgers and food from a restaurant called Big As, Big A Z, Big
Bitch:
Big
Jerk:
As.
Bitch:
ass
Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
burgers, big ass burgers.
Jerk:
Yeah. I'm deeply amused.
Bitch:
Uh, I would totally go. I really, I would go eat a big
Jerk:
Fuck
Bitch:
ass.
Jerk:
yeah, I would.
Bitch:
I would love some big ass.
Jerk:
Yes, I'm sure they're delicious. But he's figured out, Sam's figured out that the other two victims that they previously heard about, but not Penny, were very involved in their church. So what's the connection without Penny? Well, Dean has an answer for that because he jacked her diary from her room. And apparently it's not about religion. It was about purity. So virgins, virgins are disappearing.
Bitch:
Uh, virgins.
Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
I feel like I should be stealing something from like buffering the vampires later where they just like go, the patriarchy! Cause I'm just like, who wants virgins? But
Jerk:
That's
Bitch:
thankfully
Jerk:
like,
Bitch:
not Dean.
Jerk:
yeah,
Bitch:
Dean's
Jerk:
he's like,
Bitch:
down.
Jerk:
I prefer ladies with experience.
Bitch:
You and me both, Mr. Winchester. Woo hoo. High five.
Jerk:
Yeah, no. So we get a scene with three young ladies, teenagers, probably. I don't know. I'm terrible at that.
Bitch:
Yeah, they're at St. Mary's and which I guess is supposed to be like, did you think it was a university or a school?
Jerk:
Was it? I thought it was a high school.
Bitch:
Okay, so like a high school, it's a Catholic school, but those shorts, those skirts were shorts.
Jerk:
Yeah, they always are on TV, though, right? Like,
Bitch:
Yeah, I was just like,
Jerk:
like,
Bitch:
you
Jerk:
like,
Bitch:
girls don't
Jerk:
FYI,
Bitch:
look like good
Jerk:
if
Bitch:
girls.
Jerk:
you go if you go to if you're going to Catholic school, I and you have to wear a uniform, I assure you that that skirt length has to be like to your knees.
Bitch:
I feel like none was about to hit those girls with rulers on their legs. And look, I'm fairly fine with like you wearing your you can wear your skirt as short as you want to wear it. I don't
Jerk:
Right?
Bitch:
give a fuck.
Jerk:
No.
Bitch:
But I'm just saying for a Catholic school, high school,
Jerk:
That's not happening.
Bitch:
those were very short skirts
Jerk:
correct.
Bitch:
or this is a really cool punk rock high school. Like
Jerk:
I'm sorry.
Bitch:
they're just they all have like their band.
Jerk:
Yeah, so we've got three girls leaving the school at night, which is all kind of just odd, but one of them splits off from the other two. But as she's walking,
Bitch:
And
Jerk:
she
Bitch:
that's
Jerk:
hears.
Bitch:
why I was like, is this a college? But I guess the Catholic schools have boarding schools, maybe?
Jerk:
I mean, she could have just been walking home when she had like a late study sesh.
Bitch:
Guess it was like a campus at night. So they must live there. I don't know whatever. Okay
Jerk:
Oh, well, she hears a noise that sounds like a flapping above her, and then it's chasing her. And then she screams as she's looking up. And our next scene, we're at a hospital.
Bitch:
Yep. And
Jerk:
So.
Bitch:
in the dateline, her friends are feeling very bad for leaving her alone. I've seen the interview with them probably.
Jerk:
for
Bitch:
Yeah.
Jerk:
sure.
Bitch:
They're like, Oh no, I can't believe we split up. We said it was just, it was just a half a block.
Jerk:
Yeah, so Melissa is explaining to Sam and Dean that it looked like a giant bat that came at her.
Bitch:
I'm a giant bat? That sounds awesome!
Jerk:
And but she's so sure that they're not going to believe her. So she shows them the giant scratches on her back, though, which, by the way, that did not look like the best, like stitching I've ever seen.
Bitch:
No.
Jerk:
It was.
Bitch:
The port, this was, I don't know what port
Jerk:
Like what
Bitch:
she's
Jerk:
did they
Bitch:
at
Jerk:
do
Bitch:
though.
Jerk:
to
Bitch:
She's
Jerk:
this poor
Bitch:
at the
Jerk:
young
Bitch:
clinic.
Jerk:
lady's back?
Bitch:
She's at the clinic in Portland. She's not actually at the hospital. She's just like that side clinic, you
Jerk:
Because
Bitch:
know, like
Jerk:
like...
Bitch:
where you just pay with cash when you go in and they just like, we're not going to talk about what the bat did to you, lady.
Jerk:
Yeah, yeah, it was very, I was like, damn, they fucked this chick's back up. And not
Bitch:
Next
Jerk:
the scratches,
Bitch:
time on botched.
Jerk:
the stitches,
Bitch:
Next time
Jerk:
right?
Bitch:
on
Jerk:
Exactly.
Bitch:
botched.
Jerk:
So, but she's like, look, she got attacked, I got attacked, I passed out and it left, but he stole my gold promise ring. Oh? So Dean asks, insisting in a way that he's not being judgy. if she
Bitch:
But he sounded like he was being judgy.
Jerk:
should be wearing that promise ring.
Bitch:
Really? Really? Should you? Melissa, should you be wearing that ring?
Jerk:
Was it Matt Baran didn't count?
Bitch:
Matt Barne didn't count. Then I love this for you, Melissa. I really
Jerk:
It was
Bitch:
do.
Jerk:
so funny. I'm sorry. That was
Bitch:
It was
Jerk:
really funny.
Bitch:
it was just the comedy was in it. The line was it was it's a wonderful line.
Jerk:
it is.
Bitch:
So outside, they're throwing around a Batman theory, which I do appreciate. I guess
Jerk:
It's... it's so weird though.
Bitch:
it's such an absurd thing, but
Jerk:
And
Bitch:
then.
Jerk:
the way they approach it is...
Bitch:
Yeah, Detective Sam, I don't know what you're doing right now, but then Dean's, one of them asked like who, what likes virgins and gold?
Jerk:
It said P Diddy?
Bitch:
And I'm like,
Jerk:
Mmm.
Bitch:
So, but this was earlier than:Jerk:
That's
Bitch:
quite
Jerk:
true.
Bitch:
admitting what was happening there. They should have. All right. So we go back to my wonderful motel that's getting made better because now Dean's making a murder.
Jerk:
Yes,
Bitch:
What
Jerk:
so
Bitch:
makes
Jerk:
now it's
Bitch:
your
Jerk:
got...
Bitch:
motel room more cozy than a murder board?
Jerk:
Is that what it is? Liz's motel stylings. Here's how to just really freshen and warm the
Bitch:
This
Jerk:
space
Bitch:
is
Jerk:
up.
Bitch:
just
Jerk:
We need
Bitch:
this
Jerk:
a
Bitch:
side
Jerk:
really
Bitch:
of the
Jerk:
nice
Bitch:
room.
Jerk:
murder board over here. So you can have your either your lattice work or your Midwest mural on this on this wall. But over here we really need to have some good red yarn with some good thumb pins.
Bitch:
And once again, somewhere in baby is a spool of red yarn to make the murder board.
Jerk:
You're right.
Bitch:
And thumbtacks. Like
Jerk:
That's
Bitch:
do you think
Jerk:
true.
Bitch:
at some point there are deans
Jerk:
They
Bitch:
just
Jerk:
have
Bitch:
like
Jerk:
crafting
Bitch:
Sam,
Jerk:
supplies.
Bitch:
we're out of thumbtacks.
Jerk:
They have fucking crafting
Bitch:
Yeah.
Jerk:
supplies.
Bitch:
Can we get the push pins this time? Like I want the round ones. I don't want the square ones. I want the round push.
Jerk:
So Sam's like a little flummoxed because he keeps putting in these search parameters for what they're looking for, what kind of creature this could be. And he keeps ending up on World of Warcraft fan sites. What is this point to? Dragons. and
Bitch:
Yeah. So they call for backup.
Jerk:
Yeah, I could do.
Bitch:
Or phone a friend.
Jerk:
Yeah, it's Bobby who is making them one of the most depressing dinners I've ever seen.
Bitch:
That's exactly how I described it. A depressing can of food.
Jerk:
It looks so bad. Like I will throw together like I love I actually enjoy like what I call a jokingly call a struggle meal. I am not struggling. It is not to like imply otherwise. Well, like I'm going to throw like this can of whatever and throwing a fucking tortilla and throw whatever leftovers I have, you know, whatever. Like just throw shit
Bitch:
Cool,
Jerk:
together.
Bitch:
I'm gonna
Jerk:
I
Bitch:
make
Jerk:
love
Bitch:
a goulash,
Jerk:
that.
Bitch:
yeah, or whatever,
Jerk:
Love
Bitch:
yeah.
Jerk:
it. This looks fucking gross and sad.
Bitch:
This looks like the dinty more can of
Jerk:
Oh,
Bitch:
beef
Jerk:
yeah,
Bitch:
stew
Jerk:
it does.
Bitch:
that expired 20
Jerk:
Yes.
Bitch:
years ago. Bobby,
Jerk:
It looks,
Bitch:
do better.
Jerk:
it's not good. Yeah,
Bitch:
Yeah,
Jerk:
not
Bitch:
lay
Jerk:
okay.
Bitch:
off the whiskey, and also, this reminds me when I would go to my dad's ranch cabin when he was just uber-batcheloring an old man, you would just find the cabinet full of chili. And you're
Jerk:
Yeah,
Bitch:
like,
Jerk:
that would
Bitch:
you know,
Jerk:
be better.
Bitch:
it's just...
Jerk:
A can of Hormel would be less offensive than this.
Bitch:
It does look like dog food. Anyways, so
Jerk:
Mm-hmm.
Bitch:
Bobby's kind of like. Not
Jerk:
Uh,
Bitch:
into this question, but into it. Yeah.
Jerk:
but he has like, I love his line. He said, this is not like the Loch Ness monster. Dragons aren't real. I love that. Oh, I'm happy.
Bitch:
No, and he also brings the A.O. and you know, he wants to get more information. He asks if you should call Hogwarts.
Jerk:
He does. We get our Hogwarts reference. But then Bobby tries to ask Dean about if he's revealed anything else to Sam.
Bitch:
Look over there!
Jerk:
Yeah, but Dean's in the room with Sam's. This is real awkward. He tries to play it off. Hmm.
Bitch:
I should know that you should know like you're sharing your root leg. I don't
Jerk:
Mm-hmm.
Bitch:
know, but Dean also should have just put him on speaker and say it solved that problem. But anyhow, all right. So we cut to Sam just reading through John's journal.
Jerk:
Yeah. And Dean's point off he's like, look, I remember if John had dad had written about, you know, the never ending story, which is annoying reference because
Bitch:
That's
Jerk:
I
Bitch:
a luck dragon.
Jerk:
it's a luck dragon, not a traditional dragon with these type of wings. And there aren't any traditional like medieval type dragons in the never ending story so fail reference on that one.
Bitch:
We don't know if it's a medieval dragon yet or not, to be
Jerk:
Well,
Bitch:
fair.
Jerk:
we don't, but we've heard about bat wings.
Bitch:
So yeah, so we've heard so far our clues are bat wings and virgins.
Jerk:
Yeah, and I don't think Foulcore cares about that.
Bitch:
I don't think Falcor cares about virgins at all.
Jerk:
So Sam
Bitch:
I mean
Jerk:
though,
Bitch:
he might,
Jerk:
sitting there, I
Bitch:
I don't know,
Jerk:
mean,
Bitch:
I don't
Jerk:
who
Bitch:
know what Falcor
Jerk:
knows? No
Bitch:
got
Jerk:
judgment,
Bitch:
into.
Jerk:
Falcor, but
Bitch:
Whatever man.
Jerk:
Sam's sitting there pondering and starts asking questions though, and he asks if they've caught a skinwalker lately. And Dan's caught pretty off guard by this, but plays it off, like, oh, don't ring a bell. Because Sam's having some weird deja vu shit, but. Dean just totally gaslights him about all this like now we haven't no no skinwalkers your eggs are still scrambled like like shit
Bitch:
Mm-mm all on your mind.
Jerk:
Not
Bitch:
It's all
Jerk:
cool.
Bitch:
on your mind. It's just
Jerk:
Not
Bitch:
not cool man.
Jerk:
cool.
Bitch:
It's not
Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
it's not it's rude
Jerk:
But then Bobby calls and he's got someone a reference to talk about dragons.
Bitch:
does is a source.
Jerk:
DrVizjak at SFU.
Bitch:
Yeah, it was also sounds like shut the fuck up university. So that's kind of made me happy, but apparently it's supposed to stay in for San Francisco university.
Jerk:
Yes, which Dean's going to go and leave Sam to research alone, which also seems like just like a weird setup right now. Everything's kind of iffy. This dude's been like, doesn't remember the last year and a half of his life.
Bitch:
And you're just going to leave him by
Jerk:
And
Bitch:
himself
Jerk:
he's really like,
Bitch:
in Portland?
Jerk:
sounds like.
Bitch:
That's cool.
Jerk:
Does not seem OK, but all right.
Bitch:
Yeah, whatever, whatever your caretaker status tells you, like, okay.
Jerk:
We get a scene now though where we don't really know where this is happening. It's something underground like a cellar or prison or an industrial site. It's dark and concrete and metal and there's girls in cages.
Bitch:
And they're crying.
Jerk:
They're not happy
Bitch:
God,
Jerk:
about
Bitch:
there's
Jerk:
it.
Bitch:
so many girls crying.
Jerk:
And a dude flies in with wings. then uses his glowing red hand to weld the cage back shut?
Bitch:
I mean, that is the handiest shit. Like, I wish I had that also.
Jerk:
I'm sorry.
Bitch:
And the friend of the pod, a cat on you just made an appearance on our camera. But
Jerk:
Good
Bitch:
she's
Jerk:
day.
Bitch:
going to sleep good night on you. But yeah, I mean, so I feel like I want this superpower.
Jerk:
I'm gonna
Bitch:
This seems
Jerk:
go.
Bitch:
like, OK, so what I had to like break into the gate this weekend.
Jerk:
Right.
Bitch:
Like if I could have just like melted away things, like it would have been so much faster and then he just re-melted it back. Like, Oh man, it'd be so handy.
Jerk:
be quite useful.
Bitch:
It's quite a skill, quite a skill.
Jerk:
So we get, Dean's pulled up to this property, it's a house, big nice house, and
Bitch:
a
Jerk:
it's
Bitch:
fucking
Jerk:
Dr.
Bitch:
amazing
Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
house, like just pure like vintage San Francisco, like the type of San Francisco you actually like, like not the part of San Francisco where you're getting like stabbed and shit. Like just like the really gorgeous like old houses where you know, they're practicing all sorts of occult shit. You know occult shit happened in that house.
Jerk:
Oh,
Bitch:
So
Jerk:
I'm sure.
Bitch:
yeah, and we get to meet my woman crush. Oh, yeah.
Jerk:
Oh, yeah, I'm sure I was like, this is up your alley. This is Dr. Eleanor Vizierak. And Dean has to name drop Bobby to even get her to come to the door. But she also tells Dean to kick Bobby in the jewels next time he sees him. But
Bitch:
And
Jerk:
won't
Bitch:
she tells
Jerk:
tell.
Bitch:
him to do this while she's drinking out of this very fancy crystal glass in a gorgeous library. Her hair is in this beautiful like upswept
Jerk:
French twists
Bitch:
just
Jerk:
thing,
Bitch:
like classic
Jerk:
yeah.
Bitch:
French twist. And it was just there. And like she has on like this beautiful like, like blue, like wrap blouse and a pencil skirt and heels in her fucking house. Like she just hangs out in her house like this. like that like I want to I ain't gonna
Jerk:
I'm
Bitch:
like
Jerk:
gonna
Bitch:
I'm
Jerk:
go.
Bitch:
gonna hang out my house in my spandex yoga shirts shorts but
Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
damn this woman's
Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
amazing
Jerk:
Cheers.
Bitch:
like she's so good and she's just gorgeous and like but gorgeous in like that just eight woman aging like gracefully
Jerk:
owning it.
Bitch:
kind of way
Jerk:
Oh, yeah. Classy.
Bitch:
did you
Jerk:
Classy.
Bitch:
ever know that you okay go on sorry
Jerk:
Well, but Dean wants to know what the story is, though, that, uh, that apparently she's got some, something against Bobby, but she won't tell. She said that's Bobby's story to tell. So Dean goes straight for it. Wants to talk dragons and she's like, yeah, they disappeared. This isn't funny. It's been like 700 years since we've seen one and Dean's like, yeah, but how do you kill them? So she's like, hey, you need a blade forged
Bitch:
Duh.
Jerk:
with dragon's blood. So you need the blood of something to kill the thing.
Bitch:
Right, however, hey, you know there were dragons before and there aren't that many, but there are dragon swords. There are.
Jerk:
dragon swords. And guess what? Out of a handful in the world, Dr. Visiak has one in her basement. It
Bitch:
in
Jerk:
took her.
Bitch:
her basement.
Jerk:
It took her. I love how she says what it took to get it. Two decades, countless hours and really bad sex with an Eastern European ambassador. Oh, I was like, Oh, man.
Bitch:
Why
Jerk:
I was
Bitch:
aren't
Jerk:
like, yeah.
Bitch:
you my mentor? Dr. Visiak, please come find me and be my mentor. Also, I just think it's amazing to have, I really admire people who can have an obsession and just the idea to go after one topic and just only focus on, she's made this idea of dragons and shit, this is her life goal,
Jerk:
Right.
Bitch:
right?
Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
That's so cool. Like that's all she's been doing. And she also has fucking stained glass in her house with like, oh my God. I just started bawling and I'm just like, oh my God, it's so pretty.
Jerk:
Yeah, she's also got a fucking giant boulder with a sword in it.
Bitch:
And the boulder in the boulder is the sword of Brunkvik, the love of her life. And it's a real thing. Did you know that?
Jerk:
What?
Bitch:
Yeah. I was going to talk about it in this. I don't know how to turn this into this lore. It's kind of lore. Not lore.
Jerk:
Lore.
Bitch:
Alright, so here there'd be dragons, there'd be dragons, and everywhere there'd be dragons. There are dragons like to basically since since man could like make up shit, like or, you know, talk about shit, there have been dragons. And it doesn't really matter like what part of the world you're from. There are dragons in Western culture, there are dragons in Eastern cultures, there are dragons among the Americas, like pretty much everywhere you go in a point in time, there's been something about dragons. are some spaces and some places that call some things dragons that I just think are ancient snakes. Like, you know, there's just some things that make you a dragon. And sometimes you're just a fucking snake. Like if you're just like scaly and like a cylinder, you're not a dragon. That's a snake. Like
Jerk:
Yeah,
Bitch:
I
Jerk:
reasonable.
Bitch:
think people need to get that definition right. And like even the definition and like, really like in the, the dictionaries and stuff are still like kind of vague. There's like, can you be a lizard? You're going to be scaling things. I don't know. But I just feel like dragons, like, I don't know. What do you think? Do you like dragons? Like, do they eat feet or is it wings? Like.
Jerk:
I mean, anything when someone someone has dragon to me, I mean, my thought is more I guess of what a traditional medieval dragon or a Japanese dragon, both of which have scales, feats and wings.
Bitch:
Okay. But even if you took that into something like, I would say like, you know, massive American dragons, you know, that same kind of idea to you, right? Like there's feats on them. There's usually wings, like, and there's you generally like fires and there's other things, right? But you just like a round tube. That's a snake.
Jerk:
Yeah, I think you're right.
Bitch:
Anyways, so. In order for us to learn about some of these dragons from around the world that have gone, because there's just so many and they just, we don't, someone should do a whole podcast on dragons and I'm pretty sure
Jerk:
probably is.
Bitch:
there's probably like 17,000 podcasts on dragons go find one. I mean, there's just like, like the nerds like behind like Game of Thrones enough. It's like, oh, this dragon is from the, you know, what happened. So we're going to talk about dragons in a fun way where we're going to play a game. OK, or more accurately, Diana is going to play a game and I'm going to tell her a limerick and it's going to be about some kind of dragon. And she has to guess the missing word. I know this sounds confusing, but now you're fine. You'll get it. OK. We'll figure
Jerk:
All right.
Bitch:
it out. All right.
Jerk:
All right.
Bitch:
So our first limerick is about Rolkvik, because that's the first one, right? All right. Also, I did not write the Limericks chat, GPT totally did. I did the research, but then I fed it into a machine because I don't have time to be this creative. Thank you, Roa overlords. All right, so our first one. Brunkvik, a Czech prince so bold, got caught in a storm, so we're told. He ended up on a mount where he found himself to count, help a lion defeat a dragon so cold. After seven long years of wandering, Brunkvik returned home pondering. He hid his sword in Charles Bridge for the blank land's future privilege, where it waits for the night's responding. So you have to answer for the blank land's future privilege. What land did Brunkvik leave the sword for?
Jerk:
I'm just going to guess, I'm going for it, like a German.
Bitch:
Well, technically it was Czechoslovakia and the answer was in the first line of the limerick. So, Brugvik, a Czech prince so bold.
Jerk:
Damn it. It was. I did
Bitch:
I'm
Jerk:
hear
Bitch:
going to
Jerk:
it.
Bitch:
go ahead and turn it off.
Jerk:
Oh, and I was just. All right. All right.
Bitch:
But I think
Jerk:
Fail
Bitch:
that's cool.
Jerk:
one.
Bitch:
Yeah. So, but Brungfik, the sword that's here, there actually is like a whole story. You can go look it up about like this guy and like, he like ended up like getting going on all these fights. He ended up like be helping a lion, like kill a dragon and then the lion and the dude become friends. And they go wander around and Akuna Matata shit.
Jerk:
I'm
Bitch:
And
Jerk:
pretty
Bitch:
then
Jerk:
friends
Bitch:
like,
Jerk:
with the lion.
Bitch:
he comes back. I don't know the swords and like Charles Bridge and Chacal Tzavakia. And it's supposed to like rise up like when the country needs it. So hopefully
Jerk:
It's kind of neat.
Bitch:
that's exciting
Jerk:
It's like the
Bitch:
and
Jerk:
Sword
Bitch:
terrifying.
Jerk:
of Gryffindor.
Bitch:
Yeah, but also terrifying. Like, can you imagine like being there and the sword coming out like, ah, no, go back down. We didn't,
Jerk:
Nah.
Bitch:
no.
Jerk:
I go, no, shit's fucked. Shit's
Bitch:
Just
Jerk:
fucked.
Bitch:
so she's fucked. We got the fucking sword coming out of the water.
Jerk:
It's how you know we thought everything was fine, but the sword.
Bitch:
That's how you know. There's one, here's the sword. All right. Our second one. In Korea, a tale that's oft told. of love that's pure, strong and bold. Ye Mong-Yong and Chun-Yang unite, though her birth marks a serpent in sight. For she's an imugi, it's told. A blank king's daughter some unfold, their love a transformation to behold. Okay, so I think chat GBT kind of fucked up in rhyme parameter skills there, but all right, so I'll tell you, I'll go through it again. All right. So Korea, a tale that's off told
Jerk:
Mm-hmm.
Bitch:
of love that's pure, strong and bold. Then there's two people that I probably butchered their names in Korea and I'm sorry. Um, but he won young and Chun yang, Chun yang, the unite. And then through her birth, though her birth marks a serpent in sight for she's an Amugi. It's told. A blank king's daughter. So what, what is she's a king's daughter, but what kind of king's daughter. She's got a birthmark that's got a serpent looking thing on it.
Jerk:
I was going to say, I think.
Bitch:
Don't overthink it.
Jerk:
No,
Bitch:
Don't overthink it.
Jerk:
my head want to go to Snake King, but I don't think that that's it. I think it's like a Dragon King. That's OK.
Bitch:
Yeah, it's a dragon. It's a dragon.
Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
The answer's
Jerk:
OK.
Bitch:
dragon. Don't ever think
Jerk:
Yay.
Bitch:
it. She's a fucking dragon king's daughter. All right.
Jerk:
Yeah. OK. Who?
Bitch:
So
Jerk:
Who?
Bitch:
this is, there is a number of variations of this, but basically, you know, there is a dude and he falls in love with a woman and she's got this birthmark and it looks like a snake or a serpent or a dragon. But then it comes to find out that she actually is one. And then like they have dragon sex and it's so hot. I don't know, I read the... Hey, it was really hot in that one
Jerk:
It really was. Molly, what's her,
Bitch:
In
Jerk:
Molly
Bitch:
the Molly
Jerk:
Harper?
Bitch:
Harper's book that dragon sex was hot and I was like I never thought dragon sex was hot until I read that book
Jerk:
I was
Bitch:
but
Jerk:
like,
Bitch:
I'm
Jerk:
oh, this is going to be weird. And I was like, OK, I'm into it.
Bitch:
into it. Yeah But anyways, I'm not a Korean dragon expert go look at more if you want to but it was just not I thought it was a very interesting interesting
Jerk:
That
Bitch:
tale
Jerk:
is.
Bitch:
And there is, I'm warning you, I am totally making out the pronunciation of this word that comes from Babylonian. So there once was a beast called Mooshoo Shoo on Babylon's gay. It came into view. A dragon with scales and eagle talons. Talent. a long neck, tall and a tongue like a python. Oh boy, we've got a frail.
Jerk:
Ooh,
Bitch:
All
Jerk:
that's
Bitch:
right,
Jerk:
upsetting.
Bitch:
so and then it goes, the blank depiction of dragons is true. Okay, let me try and repeat this, the bean asshole. All right, there once was a beast called Mushasu on Babylon's gate. It came into view. A dragon with scales and eagle talons, a long neck tail and a tongue like a python. It was a blank depiction of dragons. It's true. So we're looking for what type of depiction of dragons or which type of dragon. Yeah.
Jerk:
No, I don't know.
Bitch:
It's the earliest, I know that one was hard. I don't know how
Jerk:
That one
Bitch:
to,
Jerk:
was hard, yeah.
Bitch:
yeah. So, but basically this is
Jerk:
I
Bitch:
supposedly,
Jerk:
say Babylonian that checks. Yeah, makes
Bitch:
yeah,
Jerk:
sense.
Bitch:
so
Jerk:
Pretty
Bitch:
supposedly
Jerk:
far back.
Bitch:
like the earliest one of
Jerk:
Right.
Bitch:
is this type of one. So I think it's cool, but so he's got scales, he's got eagle talons, he's got a long nail, he's got a tongue like a python, and he's
Jerk:
That's
Bitch:
on
Jerk:
weird.
Bitch:
like,
Jerk:
Like a python tongue.
Bitch:
I
Jerk:
That's
Bitch:
guess like a
Jerk:
that's
Bitch:
snake
Jerk:
distressing.
Bitch:
tongue though.
Jerk:
Oh, I was thinking like his tongue was like a python.
Bitch:
No, I don't think it means like the tongue like constricts
Jerk:
That
Bitch:
you
Jerk:
makes
Bitch:
I think
Jerk:
so
Bitch:
I
Jerk:
much
Bitch:
just
Jerk:
more
Bitch:
meant
Jerk:
sense! What was I thinking?
Bitch:
Or you know, it's a very like a prehensile tongue, you know
Jerk:
Yeah,
Bitch:
like
Jerk:
that's where my brain was. I was like, Oh, this is upsetting.
Bitch:
that like It's very
Jerk:
Just
Bitch:
upsetting
Jerk:
has a snake fork
Bitch:
I'm just
Jerk:
is
Bitch:
like
Jerk:
like
Bitch:
no
Jerk:
a fork
Bitch:
is this this
Jerk:
snake.
Bitch:
picture on the gate of Babylon it's a real cute dragon He's not upsetting
Jerk:
That makes a lot more sense, I don't know.
Bitch:
Okay, we're gonna go one that's less upsetting because Diana,
Jerk:
Okay.
Bitch:
you do love a lake monster. And
Jerk:
I do.
Bitch:
I hate people who call them sea captains, sea captains on lakes. So we've got a ditty
Jerk:
I'm sorry.
Bitch:
about a Lake Superior creature. All right.
Jerk:
Oh.
Bitch:
There's a creature named Mishu Peshu. In Lake Superior, it roams and pursues a water panther or lynx with scales and feathers that intermix. It drowns those who dare to accrue its territory, its power, its abuse with a head like a cat and legs with blank to pat. This Ojibwe legend is quite a debut. So he's got legs with what? He's got a head like a cat. And then he's got these legs and on these legs, what are there?
Jerk:
fans.
Bitch:
That would be cool, but they're talents.
Jerk:
Talents.
Bitch:
They're talents,
Jerk:
Okay.
Bitch:
they're talents,
Jerk:
Talents
Bitch:
they're
Jerk:
makes
Bitch:
sharp, those.
Jerk:
way more sense because we're talking about dragons. And there was the
Bitch:
But
Jerk:
eagle
Bitch:
fens
Jerk:
talents.
Bitch:
would be cool too, they'd be cool. Yeah.
Jerk:
Well, I was so focused on the lake. I was
Bitch:
So
Jerk:
very lake focused.
Bitch:
again, if I mispronounce this, sorry, not a expert on dragons of the Native Americans culture. So, but
Jerk:
Mm.
Bitch:
the Michi Peshu is an Ojibwe water culture who dwells in Lake Superior, traveling around in underwater tunnels and drowning those who trespass on a territory. I kind of like that for you. Also, I love that its name is often called the underwater panther.
Jerk:
Yeah, me too, I got excited about that.
Bitch:
Yeah. Yeah. So it's technically like also it's called the underwater links and that's more of the translation, but frankly underwater panther. Awesome. Yep. All right. Our last one. All right. And I was very excited to learn about this dragon and we're still in Americas. All right.
Jerk:
Oh.
Bitch:
So in Maryland, a Snelly gaster's game, a strange creature, quite wild and untamed with razor like claws and octopus like jaws. It flew over the National Highway, unclaimed. Its horn was both long and quite sharp. One eye in the center, no mark. With blanks so immense, it just makes sense that this monster would cause such a harp. So what did it have very large things of that made it cause a harp? Which I guess is a fuss. That's a harp.
Jerk:
wings.
Bitch:
Yeah, it was wings.
Jerk:
Yay!
Bitch:
Then I figured out the game. Woo. All right.
Jerk:
I'm out.
Bitch:
And
Jerk:
Bye.
Bitch:
so I was just really happy to learn about something called a snelly gaster
Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
and
Jerk:
Duh.
Bitch:
so basically it's like a bird reptile chimera that. is in like the western portion, eastern portion of the United States. Um, theoretically may come from superstitions, German immigrants could have been used for racism. So like there's a weird history in there. And
Jerk:
Hmm.
Bitch:
he newspaper accounts in like:Jerk:
So pass.
Bitch:
Unless like, I mean, kind of also sort of sounds like a pterodactyl. Is
Jerk:
It does.
Bitch:
that kind of goes into that cryptid idea? Like are there, you know, were there pterodactyls that were like in the Americas? Whatever. But it's not, I mean, come on. It's not like yester.
Jerk:
That's cool. It's not a gaster. I
Bitch:
I don't
Jerk:
like it.
Bitch:
know if that's how you pronounce it, but that's how I'm saying it. And I'm going
Jerk:
Yeah,
Bitch:
with it. All right.
Jerk:
obviously.
Bitch:
So those were our dragon ditties.
Jerk:
Dragon diddies. Dragon diddies today.
Bitch:
Diana did quite well.
Jerk:
Let's not stretch it. I did okay.
Bitch:
It was a hard quiz. I really couldn't figure out how to make that a quiz. Like I could have just read the limerick. So it's not as fun, right? Like, you know. All right.
Jerk:
No, that's all right.
Bitch:
So we come back to, um, my woman crush ever, ever so sexy Dr. Lady and telling Dean that binding with the swords with rocks was quite the thing to do.
Jerk:
Yeah, so Dean's got to pull it out.
Bitch:
Thanks for watching!
Jerk:
And we get some really like super cute music and lighting as Dean mounts the rock to try to pull the sword from it, from it, but it don't budge and he falls and he's straining and it is a straight fail.
Bitch:
Yep, it is very good. And apparently that that sword was really bolted down. So there was like no way that Jensen could actually pull
Jerk:
That's
Bitch:
it.
Jerk:
funny.
Bitch:
And a lot of like this was like his comedic ideas, but it's just an adorable scene. Just
Jerk:
It is.
Bitch:
like him like crawling up on it. Just like, oh, it's so good.
Jerk:
So back in the motel, Sam's working on the murder wall, but takes a break to call Bobby. And while
Bitch:
Bobby,
Jerk:
he's doing that,
Bitch:
right out
Jerk:
he's
Bitch:
of
Jerk:
also,
Bitch:
thumbtacks.
Jerk:
he's also been taking another kind of break because if you look on the table, there is a pink box from Voodoo Donuts.
Bitch:
There is, and we just had voodoo donuts last week.
Jerk:
I just
Bitch:
I had a blunt
Jerk:
did.
Bitch:
donut. It was delicious.
Jerk:
Yes. So we've got, Sam is trying to get Bobby's feedback on isolating where the lair would be if some were cold, dark, and wet. And Bobby actually,
Bitch:
Thanks for watching!
Jerk:
Bobby helps him. And because he's been looking for caves, so they decided to look for sewers. And Sam tries to ask Bobby, like, hey, let's talk. Are you being weird? And Bobby is like, look. You can tell like he's asking Bobby to tell him what happened this past year, but
Bitch:
He's
Jerk:
Bobby
Bitch:
fishing,
Jerk:
just plays it
Bitch:
he
Jerk:
all
Bitch:
knows
Jerk:
off.
Bitch:
and this is why you don't gaslight somebody because Sam obviously knows like they're not telling him the whole truth.
Jerk:
Yeah. And so he's kind of upset. He gets off the phone. And it's just a little prayer slash call out to Castiel. Who surprisingly shows up.
Bitch:
He does just flap started and this is a part where I notice a voodoo donuts. Damn it. I
Jerk:
Okay,
Bitch:
really want
Jerk:
so
Bitch:
to do that.
Jerk:
we've got. And Sam lies to Castiel and like, man, yeah, I talked to Bobby. What a crazy here.
Bitch:
Yeah
Jerk:
You know, Bobby told me everything.
Bitch:
Yeah, sometimes
Jerk:
But.
Bitch:
like you got those stupid friends who shouldn't have secrets. Cass is one of those. You don't, you don't tell Cass your secrets because this shit will happen.
Jerk:
Yeah. Because I think, oh, yeah, I'm totally surprised that you survived. You know, I begged Dean not to do it. It's a miracle. It didn't kill you. How do you feel having your soul back?
Bitch:
I'm going to go ahead and turn it off.
Jerk:
Oh, Sam, Sam does pretty good job playing this off for this being all new info. But definitely
Bitch:
Yes.
Jerk:
is it kind of upset and wants to ask Casio for more details.
Bitch:
Yeah. When you just walk around no soul. And how about I bring it down for you? Thanks Cass. Uh, then we go to something that's very upsetting.
Jerk:
I didn't think you'd like this part.
Bitch:
No, no. The woman who has a like this, like like Tondra Visiak or the fuck her name is and remember it, whatever. I just call her hot doctor. And like she
Jerk:
Eleanor.
Bitch:
like there's just like, yeah, no, like we appreciate that. And this is her love of her life. This is a thing. She's she fucked a terrible ugly dude for this. She fucked an ugly dude for this.
Jerk:
She didn't say he was ugly, she just said it was bad sex. But anyways, so,
Bitch:
He
Jerk:
you
Bitch:
was probably ugly. I don't know.
Jerk:
know. But she understands the importance of being part of killing a dragon in modern times in 700 years. Fuck yeah, she wouldn't be into it otherwise. She says, it's the most valuable artifact you've ever touched as Dean walks in to the room with a bag full of explosives.
Bitch:
Mm-mm. Mm-mm. Uh-uh.
Jerk:
And
Bitch:
There
Jerk:
he
Bitch:
has
Jerk:
starts
Bitch:
to be another way. Mm-mm.
Jerk:
putting that motherfucker up.
Bitch:
Nope, no, no, sir. You take your C4 and you kindly march back out that door. Just in general, like I would not allow my leg, not even near that artifact, much less that room.
Jerk:
Well, I wouldn't want that in my house. This seems like very structurally questionable choice.
Bitch:
Yeah, could you get a forklift? And then like take and take the rock
Jerk:
I mean,
Bitch:
out of the house?
Jerk:
they got
Bitch:
Like,
Jerk:
the rock in somehow.
Bitch:
they got the rock in I wouldn't move the rock to a safer thing because you had other things are in there that also you have that stained glass. There looks like a bunch of like really expensive books in there. Like other things take it outside lady like if we're going to do explosive to explosive right?
Jerk:
So, but they don't, they closed the door and they blow that shit up.
Bitch:
Also,
Jerk:
And
Bitch:
the stores
Jerk:
uh,
Bitch:
are amazing. Oh my God.
Jerk:
and Dean goes to grab the sword and it pulls right out because it's broken in half.
Bitch:
kill him. I would kill him. I would take that and I would stab him. And that would be Dean's Dateline episode. OK, so we leave that happens and I'm just like every time it gets me every fucking time.
Jerk:
Oh
Bitch:
All right. And we're going to cut back to Portland because
Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
he takes his toothpick with him.
Jerk:
Yes. And Sam makes kind of a joke about it, but then also Sam doesn't say shit, except that he's isolated the sewer location and he's ready to go.
Bitch:
keeping some things to yourself, Sam?
Jerk:
Uh-huh. So as they start searching the sewer system, which is apparently quite stinky, that's what you would expect. Yeah, they've been searching for hours, find nothing, and then all of a sudden they stumble upon a pile of gold on the floor.
Bitch:
Just like, oops, I dropped my pile of gold in the middle of this hallway.
Jerk:
It's a very like weird placement. It makes no sense. It's just there. I'm sorry.
Bitch:
It's supposed to be the dragon's horde.
Jerk:
Yeah, but it's like a tiny pile
Bitch:
It's like this.
Jerk:
and it's in a weird spot like against the wall. It's not even like in a cubby hole. It's just awkward.
Bitch:
It's like,
Jerk:
Doesn't
Bitch:
you know,
Jerk:
make
Bitch:
like
Jerk:
sense.
Bitch:
somebody tried to like, it's like what would they would have in the commercial for like, buy my gold.
Jerk:
Yeah, because it's also not gold things that like people would generally like have a lot around like there's
Bitch:
Is
Jerk:
a
Bitch:
this
Jerk:
lot
Bitch:
this?
Jerk:
of coins and giant goblets. And I'm like, hmm.
Bitch:
Okay, all right, you with your horrid. All right, but now we get an alter. Do you love an alter?
Jerk:
I know you do. We've got our bound book. We've got candles. We've got herbs. It's a little arts and crafty for a giant bat.
Bitch:
And then just like how do bats do arts and crafts? And then I'm like, oh my God, bats doing arts and crafts. Someone make this happen. Just
Jerk:
But
Bitch:
a little
Jerk:
then
Bitch:
painting
Jerk:
they hear
Bitch:
dance.
Jerk:
yells for help.
Bitch:
Cause those girls are still crying. They're still fucking crying. Ladies, come on.
Jerk:
So they find the they find the trap girls and as they're trying to free them, the bat dragon dude, because I didn't know what else to call at this point,
Bitch:
Dragon.
Jerk:
attack Sam.
Bitch:
Hey, you're a dragon! What? You're not a dragon? That's weird. I don't know. Okay, you're a dragon, I guess.
Jerk:
And but Dean manages to cut him with the sword and it hurts him. And the guys, the the Bat Dragon dude is shocked and wants to know where it came from. Dean tells him it came from Comic Con.
Bitch:
Sure.
Jerk:
So we get we get a good fight scene. The sword they kick this, you know, they knock the sword out, Dean's hand. And he's got his crazy, glowy red hand, which we know it can like melt metal. So it probably would hurt a person pretty bad, too.
Bitch:
Yeah,
Jerk:
But.
Bitch:
I don't want to be slashing that hand. That sounds pretty
Jerk:
But they're
Bitch:
bad.
Jerk:
fighting. And then all of a sudden, wait, there's two. There's two of these guys.
Bitch:
There's another dragon bro and this dragon bro looks like he may be attracted, but we can't really tell because he just like kind of only in and out.
Jerk:
And he's got his glowy hand coming now and Sam makes the decision to kill glowy hand number two dragon first and then turns back and number one's gone.
Bitch:
I'm just...
Jerk:
Damn it. But the good news, I guess, is they can save the girls.
Bitch:
I guess the girls are fine. I don't
Jerk:
I guess.
Bitch:
know. At least when I had to go through like them, like freeing them and watching like what happens during that freeing. Like, you know, man, you know, there was like Dean douchebaggery there. But so we cut back from the what we assume are them freeing the girls to the
Jerk:
in
Bitch:
junkyard.
Jerk:
the sewer.
Bitch:
Yeah.
Jerk:
Yeah, back to the junkyard. And Dean is playing with his Pilo gold that he jacked from the hoard.
Bitch:
And Sam's just like, why don't you skrishman duck that shit? And I would be.
Jerk:
Yeah. So Sam sits down and apologizes to Dean for quote, you know what?
Bitch:
Uh oh.
Jerk:
Hmm. Basically, let's let's lose that Castiel told him what's going on. And Sam Sam thinks that he should have it. You should be able to know. And that. Dean's just annoyed, though, he's like, look, there's things you don't know could kill you. So, no, you shouldn't know these things. Well, Sam's like, yeah, but I have to be able to set things right.
Bitch:
Yeah.
Jerk:
It's not.
Bitch:
And we also, I like that he calls it the great wall of Sam.
Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
It also makes me imagine there's like other Sams like inside his head like holding back like any other shit like you can't go here I guess we the wall of Sams
Jerk:
Yeah, that'd be a great wall of Sam's. Yeah, so, but Sam's just basically, his attitude is like, look, I've gotta be able to fix it, so I have to know what I did. Because, yeah, it's
Bitch:
Because now I
Jerk:
not.
Bitch:
got a soul and I care about shit. All right, whatever. All right.
Jerk:
Well, Bobby walks up because he's been reading that journal that they found on the altar. No, the notebook, the bound journal. And apparently it's from the 14th century.
Bitch:
Well, I'm calling
Jerk:
Uh,
Bitch:
it a manuscript. Probably been calling
Jerk:
okay.
Bitch:
it a journal. And Bobby's real excited about it though. Cause
Jerk:
He is, he's
Bitch:
what's it
Jerk:
very...
Bitch:
made of? What's it made of?
Jerk:
It's made of human skin.
Bitch:
Woohoo! And I know the word for that is can't remember right now. I don't care. All right. So basically the book describes a terrible place, right? And we cut, oh, what
Jerk:
we
Bitch:
are
Jerk:
see
Bitch:
we cutting
Jerk:
headlights.
Bitch:
to?
Jerk:
It's number one dragon dude and he's meeting a random bald dude.
Bitch:
It's another dragon, you can tell because they both have the terrible black fingernails painted. Dude, like I love you goth dudes. I love it. But you don't look good with black fingernails. Like maybe one. Do you like like do the one fingernail? Do you like a pinky or something? I don't know. But anyway, so we got the other dragons and he's got backup virgins.
Jerk:
Oh yeah, he's got backup virgins.
Bitch:
Which
Jerk:
He's got
Bitch:
still like
Jerk:
van
Bitch:
has got to be
Jerk:
van
Bitch:
really hard
Jerk:
full
Bitch:
to find.
Jerk:
of virgins.
Bitch:
ws, like even like in the mid:Jerk:
Mm-mm. I guess it depends where
Bitch:
And
Jerk:
you
Bitch:
how
Jerk:
look.
Bitch:
do they determine it? Do they just know?
Jerk:
I think they just know because like they didn't have to touch that girl. They just took her ring off and they're like, oh, you bitch. You shouldn't be wearing that.
Bitch:
But no, they went to her. I mean, they still
Jerk:
Well,
Bitch:
thought
Jerk:
they went to
Bitch:
she
Jerk:
her,
Bitch:
was like supposed to
Jerk:
but.
Bitch:
be one, right? And so like what? I don't
Jerk:
Yeah, but they didn't imply anything else happened.
Bitch:
know. It's us, it's us. All right.
Jerk:
So bald dude's got his van full of girls that are bounding guy, pulls one out and takes it to number one dragon. And they go into the woods, three of them.
Bitch:
So is the other one number three dragon now? Okay.
Jerk:
Number two, it did number two dragon did. So they go into the woods and we hear it's like, well, this is kind of happening. Goes back and forth. Bobby is talking about, you know, monster land being what this book's writing about. This manuscript is about AKA purgatory. Oh, purgatory,
Bitch:
Oh,
Jerk:
you say. Purgatory
Bitch:
I would like
Jerk:
has been
Bitch:
some
Jerk:
a theme.
Bitch:
more whiskey because I have a drinking problem. Um, which
Jerk:
Well,
Bitch:
is,
Jerk:
yeah, they do.
Bitch:
this is what, you know, once again, AA it's a thing, Dean, if you need it, Bobby, Sam, y'all might want to talk about it too. But anyway, so Bobby explains that it's not just, you know, this isn't just some book.
Jerk:
Mm-mm. Yeah, no, they're, um, this is all about purgatory. They're not just hanging out in the sewers. This is it. And it's not just like a book that left laying around. This is an instruction manual. It tells you how to open a door. but they've all but the last page. So they don't really have all the instructions.
Bitch:
And a couple of pertinent things. So Dean says that I know a demon who would have loved to have learned that. And so we're going
Jerk:
Yep.
Bitch:
back to, you
Jerk:
Crowley.
Bitch:
know, let's remember Crowley wanted to know how to get into purgatory. So we got some, some dragons here. They're just open a door to purgatory. That seems weird.
Jerk:
Mm-hmm.
Bitch:
And then something that's an interesting fact. So, okay. Well, we'll get to the next part and then I'll go to an interesting fact. Right. Go.
Jerk:
So we've got number one and number three dragon are at the edge of this cliff with this girl. And number one starts to chant and there's fire down in the bottom and he cuts his hand, he's bleeding into it. And then they throw her in. And Bobby's still talking. because the he's saying like, Hey, that last sheet, this instruction from this manuscript isn't about how to open a door to go over there. It's about to open it up to let something.
Bitch:
And the things that they're saying, which they're talking in Latin, basically translate to, I invoke you that indissoluble, indissoluble, I don't know what that fucking word is, that something bound to my power. So I guess I'm not binding anything to my power. And I agree. All right. So you should come to me without delay. You should appear here immediately, mother. And
Jerk:
Hmm
Bitch:
this is actually taken, this is, I think really fun and interesting. This is actually taken from a very obscure manuscript preserved in the Bavarian State Library in Munich. And it is a manual of necromancy from the early 15th century, AKA a grimoire. It's also known as the Codex Latinus Montesensis 849. It is not bound in human skin. Um, oh, that's a word anthropomorphically. That's the word. That's what it means. Anthropomorphically. That's what it means. Yeah. And that's what means in the bound books. You can look at them in Harvard. But in the first page is really are missing. So is it actually a book? If you go online, like I found some translations of it that you could buy, but the translations are in Russian. And so like, it's kind of weird. I don't really need it. Like I've got the PDF of it, but it's like in Russian. So then I'm Google translating something was already a translate of like, so I'm pretty sure I'm just installing Russian malware in my system. But
Jerk:
I'm sorry.
Bitch:
I'm not quite positive. Anyways, you can go find it. Like, if you go to Munich, you can read it.
Jerk:
There
Bitch:
But
Jerk:
you
Bitch:
it's
Jerk:
go.
Bitch:
been digitized. I'm just trying to find the version of it, because they've digitized a bunch of books in that library. But, nice. Neat, huh?
Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
Oh, also, also, it's called like, so there's a summary of one of them that was for sale on eBay, on eBay, and it's called it Munich demonic magic.
Jerk:
Oh
Bitch:
And
Jerk:
god.
Bitch:
you will find both household practices at that time, for example, to find a horse, or to detect a thief, and make a castle invisible and ways to gain a woman's love. Apparently, I don't know, that's what eBay says is in that book.
Jerk:
Huh. It sounds versatile.
Bitch:
Sure, do a lot of things with this Grim War. I'm
Jerk:
Well,
Bitch:
sorry, so okay, the girl's been sacrificed.
Jerk:
she's been thrown over the ledge. Bobby's telling his story and ends with what they're trying to call. It's something called the mother of all. Hmm. What does this harken back to for us? Haven't there been conversations with our alphas about mother?
Bitch:
Mother!
Jerk:
What? Mother. So back at our ledge, this girl
Bitch:
Or is
Jerk:
that
Bitch:
it,
Jerk:
was...
Bitch:
they also said, is it Mother of Dragons? And I was trying to, I did not, but I was like, was this before or after Game of Thrones? I mean, I know Game of Thrones is out, but before it became an HBO thing.
Jerk:
videos before.
Bitch:
Isn't that crazy?
Jerk:
They don't say mother
Bitch:
You
Jerk:
of
Bitch:
did
Jerk:
all
Bitch:
it
Jerk:
though.
Bitch:
first.
Jerk:
They don't say mother of dragons.
Bitch:
No, he does.
Jerk:
Does he? No.
Bitch:
Because they were trying to figure out what her name, what it meant, and he was like, does it mean Mother of Dragons? I don't know, I have it in my notes, I say it so. Moving on.
Jerk:
So the girl floats back up though from the bottom of the cliff and she's kind of looks like looks a little dirty and beat but also kind of on fiery but also better. So does that make sense?
Bitch:
Yeah, she's all her woes like, you know, from crying for seven days
Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
have been cured. And now there's someone just riding that girl's meat suit, which is now we know why when the dragons were taking her away, they're like, you should be lucky. But I'm
Jerk:
Mm-hmm.
Bitch:
also like, what's up with the rest of the virgins?
Jerk:
That's a lot.
Bitch:
That you had you just need one girl.
Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
Why? What happens to the rest of them in the van? You
Jerk:
Maybe
Bitch:
just
Jerk:
if it didn't
Bitch:
let them
Jerk:
work.
Bitch:
free
Jerk:
Are they
Bitch:
like.
Jerk:
backups? In case this one didn't work.
Bitch:
I don't know, but anyhow.
Jerk:
Yeah, super weird. But yeah, she just she tells number one that she just wants to get started.
Bitch:
Well, she's also pissed because she's been kept waiting, right? And
Jerk:
Well,
Bitch:
she
Jerk:
yeah.
Bitch:
is the mother of all. She is here and she has shit to do. If you had done your job appropriately, I wouldn't have to wait on you. God damn it. Just do your fucking job. All right. So speaking of do your fucking job, is it just kidding Diana? What do you have for casting?
Jerk:
Oh my gosh. So I will kick off with our number one dragon was played by Ilja Volokh. He has been actually in a lot of things. And I'm just going to be up front. A lot of them are smaller roles and have the word Russian in them. So, I mean,
Bitch:
Just like
Jerk:
I'm
Bitch:
things
Jerk:
not.
Bitch:
like Russian gangster, Russian
Jerk:
Yes.
Bitch:
switch.
Jerk:
Russian man, Russian businessman. Like it was actually like, it is not a knock on him or his career. Do you, awesome, good job, you know, all that. But it was kind of funny scrolling through his IMDB. But specific roles, Vladimir Kraskin in Air Force One, Russ Putin in Monkey Bone, Harry in The Soloist, and then he plays Master Org in Power Rangers Wild Force, the
Bitch:
Pew
Jerk:
series.
Bitch:
pew!
Jerk:
We've got also our your your beloved Dr. Eleanor Visiak.
Bitch:
Hmm.
Jerk:
It's played by Kim Johnston Ulrich. She does
Bitch:
She looks like a cam, doesn't she? Yeah.
Jerk:
it passes out.
Bitch:
I think she also has super cam control vibes.
Jerk:
That's probably why it is. Yeah. So she's she's done a lot of just single episode work, but did have an ongoing like a major ongoing role in passions. So like soapy stuff. And then
Bitch:
No,
Jerk:
also.
Bitch:
no. So passion. You know why? Why? I know passions is because of Buffy. And all I can think is going to me still down the well, because that's a show where they I really need to go. I need to go back and watch. That's a show like they eventually just like made a doll like start haunting and like it got real
Jerk:
Yeah,
Bitch:
weird.
Jerk:
hen she was also Terry in the:Bitch:
Yeah,
Jerk:
Good cast.
Bitch:
so good. Yeah, it's just, you know, for the, the, the ensemble, like it was a bunch of leg, I don't know, I think there was a bunch of like, I won't call it, but like, there were small roles in here that does,
Jerk:
Yes.
Bitch:
I thought we're all, everyone was great. It was just like such
Jerk:
I agree.
Bitch:
a good episode. And sadly, I think this now we may come back to her eventually. I don't know. Um, but I love her a lot. I just think she's a great, like, just the style is obvious. I'm not going to go up like, you know, just want to be here. I want to be the concept of her like that's the grown up like you want I want to be right like
Jerk:
Right.
Bitch:
oh like I will never be that grown up like is that you know like I am too much of a mass to be that grown up but if I could be let me her so I said at the beginning of this we are out of bummer we're you know zero episodes since bummer land
Jerk:
Yeah, super fun.
Bitch:
What did you think?
Jerk:
I mean, I really stressful that that that Dean's insisting on lying to Sam, but that wasn't Bumbersville about it. It was a fun episode.
Bitch:
Again, again, again. All right. So.
Jerk:
They boys never learn. Never learn.
Bitch:
Yeah, and this is one of the supernatural tropes I get. I'm calling trope or whatever. Is this a thing they do? And I'm just like, I don't know, I kind of get over it really like the stuff. I just don't like people. One, I don't let people lie to each other.
Jerk:
Go.
Bitch:
In general, it makes me uncomfortable and awkward. And so I think I feel bad when the boys do it to each other. And also just gaslighting someone's never cool.
Jerk:
No.
Bitch:
It's just not telling truth.
Jerk:
I agree.
Bitch:
Even it was you smell, you fucked a girl who smelled like a Julie. I mean, is that the last thing you tell them? You're like, by the way.
Jerk:
Where do you lead with that?
Bitch:
I probably would start with, and because there were things Sam needs to know, because I would be like, Sam, you should probably go get tested for a bunch of STIs. You were very, very busy this last year. We noticed
Jerk:
That's true.
Bitch:
that you were picking up a lot of skanky women. And I love a skank, no shame on you, but
Jerk:
But
Bitch:
you
Jerk:
yeah,
Bitch:
should probably get tested.
Jerk:
because this just do you care about protection when you don't have a soul? I
Bitch:
Probably not. I'm
Jerk:
mean,
Bitch:
betting
Jerk:
I guess,
Bitch:
like condoms
Jerk:
or are you
Bitch:
are
Jerk:
super
Bitch:
like-
Jerk:
practical and that's very, very sensible?
Bitch:
And
Jerk:
I
Bitch:
it's
Jerk:
don't
Bitch:
just
Jerk:
know.
Bitch:
like, I only came on her stomach. It's fine. You know, just. I'm so glad my mom will never listen
Jerk:
Oh
Bitch:
to this. Although I did my apparently one of my aunts does I don't know if I believe that or not, but
Jerk:
Oh my gosh.
Bitch:
my cousin told me that she was like, no, that's you know, that's let's just show them Okay, so if you're listening, I'm sorry
Jerk:
Wow.
Bitch:
Anyway, so yeah, I I enjoy this episode. You know, I think we get it's a very small like, like, I think there's I don't know. It's hard being like, I know, I know what's happening, right? So because we're only in what we're episode 12
Jerk:
12.
Bitch:
of the season.
Jerk:
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Bitch:
So I feel like so this feels like there's a big bad reveal. Right.
Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
And she's
Jerk:
Yeah,
Bitch:
and
Jerk:
we
Bitch:
she's
Jerk:
just got
Bitch:
cute.
Jerk:
our big,
Bitch:
Yeah.
Jerk:
I think we just got our big bad. And then I think, um, yeah, I think it's a, you know, it's a nice, it's a nice light one. My one complaint, and this is not just like, this is, I feel like this is not being needy or asking too much. I feel like if you're going to have an episode about dragons, we needed at least one like good dragon silhouette at least.
Bitch:
Yeah, I do appreciate the I thought it was clever, you know, the way that they addressed it, like without
Jerk:
I get
Bitch:
spending
Jerk:
it.
Bitch:
a lot of money, you know, there's a lot of flapping and there did a lot of things like if you read into the effects, like when the dragons around they would do like have really low voices, like
Jerk:
Mm-hmm.
Bitch:
in the background. So there's stuff like I think they did a really excellent job, but I get it like just like a, I want to see what your bat wings look like. Like,
Jerk:
Yeah, I don't even need like a full
Bitch:
are they
Jerk:
on like
Bitch:
like,
Jerk:
view like a night like just because
Bitch:
I mean,
Jerk:
it just
Bitch:
are
Jerk:
a
Bitch:
they
Jerk:
silhouette
Bitch:
Affleck
Jerk:
like a
Bitch:
bat wings? Are they Kilmer bat wings? Are they like, what
Jerk:
Yeah
Bitch:
kind of wings are they?
Jerk:
That's my complaint and I would have liked at least just one good silhouette like I don't even need the real thing Just a fucking silhouette would have made me happy
Bitch:
Yeah, I mean,
Jerk:
That's
Bitch:
they
Jerk:
it
Bitch:
also made them super creepy, right? Like they made
Jerk:
Oh yeah.
Bitch:
dragons like really fucking creepy. Like these dudes are they're gross. I mean,
Jerk:
Yeah.
Bitch:
they're just like, like.
Jerk:
And they have Weldy hands.
Bitch:
They have wealthy hands and they're just going at leg.
Jerk:
stats and versions.
Bitch:
But they haven't been around for like 700 years, right? So I don't think
Jerk:
to where
Bitch:
that
Jerk:
the
Bitch:
was
Jerk:
fuck
Bitch:
addressed.
Jerk:
have they been?
Bitch:
So, yeah, I guess maybe some things are probably still going to come up. But yeah, I mean.
Jerk:
But yeah,
Bitch:
It was
Jerk:
it
Bitch:
a
Jerk:
was
Bitch:
fun,
Jerk:
a good episode.
Bitch:
it was,
Jerk:
It was
Bitch:
it was
Jerk:
fun.
Bitch:
a fun episode.
Jerk:
Totally fun.
Bitch:
I thought like, we get like, we get the first like, Oh, puppy dog Sam is back. It was just like, it was an immediate like jump, but I also think like, I was thinking about, I was watching this earlier that. Jared Padalecki though did like such a conscious at least like his choices that he made as soul of Sam were so deliberate that the switch to Sam has a soul is super obvious, right. And there have been talks, you know, interviews with Jensen Ackles where he said he really hated like working with soul of Sam, because it was like, I'd spent all this time developing this relationship with, you know, with Jared Padalecki's characters for that other Sam, right? So you can really see the acting choices and I think that's really impressive.
Jerk:
I agree.
Bitch:
But
Jerk:
I
Bitch:
also
Jerk:
agree.
Bitch:
just personal preference, you know, with the emotionally unavailable Sam, except for the Bobby thing. Don't kill your dad.
Jerk:
Not very nice.
Bitch:
It's not nice. Patricide is never a good thing. It's just not. All right. I think on that note, I'm with that on a shirt.
Jerk:
Right.
Bitch:
Patricide, never a good thing. All right. Cheers shirt.
Jerk:
Cheers, bitch.
