Many people perceive an addiction as being something they have no control over. Something that happens to them rather than something that’s actually part of a bigger picture and order. In this episode Dr John Demartini delves into the mechanics of the mind and its connection to addiction. Learn how you can take command and be fully mindful in your life to create profound transformations through the power of perceptions and understanding hidden agendas and unconscious motives.

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So if you don't fill your day with high priority actions that inspire you,

your day's going to fill up a low priority distractions,

and distractions are all the impulses and instincts, infatuation resentments,

and seeking and avoidings of subjectively biased information that you

misinterpret about your reality.

Every human being has a set of priorities,

a set of values that are unique to them.

Things that are most to least important in their life. This set of values,

called the hierarchy of values, is fingerprint specific.

No two people you'll ever meet will have the same set of priorities.

No two will have the same vantage point looking at life,

nor experiences that they've judged,

which are the voids that drive these values.

And this set of values dictates how they perceive, decide and act.

So therefore you are acting and deciding and perceiving, according to yours.

In this hierarchy, as you go up the list of values,

they become more intrinsically driven,

means that you have a spontaneous inspiration to

And as you go down the list of values,

things that are really unimportant eventually,

you need outside motivation to get you to do.

Now I use the analogy of a young boy who's 10 years old, who likes video games.

You don't need to motivate him with reward or punishment to

do his video games, because it's intrinsic,

he just loves doing it. He spontaneously acts.

But you may need to extrinsically motivate him to do his chores, his homework,

or clean up his room. And then you will do,

if you do your homework then you'll get to play video games. If you don't,

you won't get to play. So you use reward and punishment systems.

So extrinsic motivation is a symptom of somebody doing

something that's not really engaging and not really highest on their value.

So anytime you are unable, in your perception,

to fulfill and do the actions that fulfill your highest values,

you're going to need motivation. And I have said many,

many decades now that motivation is a symptom,

never a solution for human beings.

I don't need motivation to do what I love doing, which is my highest value,

which is teaching and researching and writing. Those things are spontaneous,

I do them every day.

But I would probably need motivation to go and drive,

because I haven't driven in 32 years, or cook,

which I haven't done since I was 24. All lower priorities,

lower value actions, when you do them,

you devalue yourself, you drain your energy, you

distract yourself, they're unfulfilling, they're frustrating.

You tend to procrastinate, hesitate doing them,

unless something is motivating you.

Somebody at work who's not engaged and not inspired and doesn't feel that the

job duties that they are doing,

help them fulfill their highest values or a young boy at school that doesn't

feel the classes he's taking has helped him fulfill what his highest values are,

is not going to be engaged. And you're going to constantly have to motivate him,

which in business is costly. And at school,

usually leads to diagnosis, attention deficit,

defiant disorders, because they're unfulfilled and they're frustrated.

If you fill your day with the highest priority actions,

you automatically increase the probability of achievement.

You'll automatically walk your talk because you're congruent with what you

value. Whatever's highest on your value your identity revolves around.

Whatever's lowest on your value you don't want to be associated with.

When you're living by your highest values, your perceptions are more acute,

you're able to grab more information,

more intentive memory and more actions that are clear and you take actions on it

as I said. You also expand space and time horizons.

You get a bigger vision of yourself.

And just like the boy who loves his video games,

the second he conquers a video game, he wants to go to a bigger,

more challenging one,

which means that you want to innovate and create and wake up your genius because

you're pursuing challenges that inspire you.

It's been shown that challenge that inspire you, innovate,

cause innovation and creativity.

You also increase the blood supply when you're doing your highest values,

when you're doing what's really priority in life, your blood,

glucose and oxygen goes into the forebrain,

into what is called the executive center, the prefrontal cortex.

That center is involved in inspired vision. You see your future.

Strategic planning,

you mitigate the risk and you come up with strategies on how to achieve so you

increase things with foresight. You tend to have spontaneous action,

you want to execute the plans you see.

And you have self-governance, because the

prefrontal cortex has GABA and glutamate and N-Acetylaspartate,

neurotransmitters that calm down the amygdala,

which is the impulse and instinct center,

which are all the source of our distractions.

So the second you live by your highest value, you maximize your performance,

you wake up a leader, you walk with integrity.

You feel that you're doing what you love,

you can't wait to get up in the morning and do it.

You tap dance to work if you're at work with that. And children love to learn.

Children love to learn what's highest on their value.

So every time you live by the highest priority and you wake up the executive

center, the prefrontal cortex, you maximize the path of mastery,

the path of power, the path to power, because you empower your life.

But anytime you're doing things lower on your values,

which is usually a byproduct of seeing people around you that you think are

more successful or more intelligent, have more money,

have more stability in their relationships, more social savvy,

more connections, more physical fitness or beauty or more spiritual awareness,

anytime you subordinate and minimize yourself to somebody else and you're too

humble to admit what you see in them around you is inside you,

you'll minimize you,

exaggerate them and inject their values and cloud the clarity of what you feel

is your calling and purpose in life. The real highest value in your life.

Your purpose is an express of your highest value.

Your identity is an expression of your highest value.

Your epistemological learning is maximized in your highest value.

But anytime you subordinate to people around you and try to be envy other people

and imitate other people and live in the chameleon effect and try to do that,

you disempower yourself because you're not being authentic self and you're

living by lower priorities, because their values are different than yours.

Nobody's getting up in the morning and dedicating their life to your hierarchy

of values. If you don't,

you're almost sure to be distracted by everybody else's projections.

You've seen it.

Think about a time when you've been infatuated with

to lose them and have them in your life

and so you started to do things weren't normal for you in order to fit into them

for fear of loss of them.

And that's what happens when you surround yourself with people you're putting on

pedestals and minimizing yourself to,

you inject all their values and those are not necessarily your highest value,

and so you're in some degree of depreciation.

And as a result of that, you're needing motivation all the time.

You don't have the momentum building acceleration of a spontaneous action.

Therefore prioritizing your life is essential.

And anytime you're living in those values, lower values,

the unfulfillment makes you go from the executive center into the amygdala.

The amygdala is where you're avoiding predator and seeking prey, avoiding pain,

seeking pleasure, trying to look for a one sided world. And as you know,

if you're in a relationship and you're looking for a one sided world and you're

not embracing both sides, it causes disturbance.

If you're in a business and you're setting up fantasies and not real objectives,

you're setting up chaos.

In every area of your life when the amygdala is running,

it's maybe great for emergencies when you're about to be shot or killed or some

really surviving emergency, but it's not great for mastering your life.

So if you don't fill your day with high priority actions that inspire you,

your day's going to fill up with low priority distractions and distractions are

all the impulses and instincts, infatuation resentments,

and seeking and avoidings of subjectively biased information that you

misinterpret about your reality,

like how to put them on pedestals your people around you, or put them in pits.

If you put people in pits and judge and look down on them,

you're going to want to try to change them to be more like you and that's going

to be futile and you waste all the energy on that.

And you minimize yourself and put people on pedestals

you're going to try to change you to be like everybody else,

and that's futile and not getting a tremendous amount of energy out of it.

But if you live by your highest values and live authentically and you do it in a

way that serves other people in their highest values, you have utility,

not futility.

And you actually maximize your potential in life because you're creating an

equitable equitable, fair exchange with others that are sustainable.

And then people want to have a relationship with you,

people want to do business with you, people want to share with you,

people want to socialize with you,

and you start empowering all areas of your life.

The path of power has a lot to do with priority. I always say,

if you don't learn how to prioritize your life and empower your life,

you're going to be inundated by everybody else's expectations.

If you don't get up and fill your day with really important things,

it fills up with things that aren't important. Entropy,

which is a tendency to go to disorder occur spontaneously in people that don't

take order and put their life in order.

And the way you put your life in order is first by identifying what your values

are.

And I've been doing Value Determinations literally 44 years now.

And I'm amazed how many people don't know their values. On my website,

drdemartini.com there's a complimentary free Value Determination process,

which I hope to God you can go and take the time to do if you haven't done it,

it takes 30 minutes of your time. It's complimentary, it's private. Do it,

do it a week from now. Do it a month from now. Do it a quarter from now.

And compare them and look at them and be honest with yourself because a lot of

times, the first time you ask, you're asking, being asked 13 questions.

And the first time you answer them,

you're going to want to write down what you fantasize and what people expect

from you and what you think it 'ought to be' and 'should be'

and 'supposed to be', instead of what your life demonstrates.

Your life demonstrates your values.

Every decision you make is based on what you believe will give you the greatest

advantage over disadvantage to what you value most.

So look and do the Value Determination on my website. Take the time to do it,

print it out, do it again a week from now,

print it out and look for the pattern and be as honest as you can,

because I've been doing it a long time and I notice people don't want to face

the truth about themselves sometime.

They want to write down what they fantasize.

I was speaking one time to an organization. I said,

how many of you want to be financially independent? Everybody put their hand up.

And then I looked at their life and what was in their values,

it wasn't what was important in their life.

Buying immediate gratifying consumables that depreciated value,

which would cost them and get them in debt with credit cards,

which separated pleasure from pain was the result of what they

actually were doing instead of actually buying assets that accumulated that

helped them build wealth. So many people thought they want that,

but then their life doesn't demonstrate the actions that lead to it.

So I'm not interested in what you fantasize about in your life,

and I'm interested in what your life demonstrates.

And that's why doing that Value Determination process

once you understand what it really is and you start structuring your life

accordingly, you're on your path to power, you're on the path of mastery.

You're on the path of self-actualization, you wake up your genius,

you wake up your leader, you start doing things spontaneously and are inspired.

But that requires a very key element.

And that is learning the art of delegating lower priority things.

There's a lot of things that an individual may be thinking they must do every

day. But the real truth is none of those are essential to your daily activities.

If you delegate, you can free many of those up. But you may say, well,

I can't delegate, I can't afford to delegate.

I don't make enough money doing it. Well, please get this.

If you're doing everything in your life yourself,

and those things are all different levels of hierarchy and your values and

you're doing lower priority things,

just know every time you do low priority things, you devalue yourself.

And every time you do high priority things, you value yourself.

And when you value you, so does the world.

And if you don't value yourself and keep doing low priority things,

you'll devalue yourself and depreciate yourself and so will the world.

So it actually burdens you to do low priority things.

And if you're not delegating lower priority things and doing the highest

priority things,

you're not maximizing your economic potential and your

That's the psychology priority.

That's why I take so much time to emphasize that in almost every program I'm

teaching around the world.

So if you're not delegating lower priority things and you're doing and trapped

doing those low priority things,

let me give you some samples of things that people come up with that justify

them doing low priority things and devalue themselves;

If I delegate it, it's going to cost me more than I make. Well,

if you delegate to somebody who's not inspired to do it,

who's needing motivation and is not an expert in what you're doing and doesn't

love doing it and you don't now free yourself up to do

people that generates more than the cost, you're correct.

But if you are free to do something that's higher in priority in your life,

that's able to produce and serve more people and actually generate more income

than the cost of that delegation,

it's insane not to delegate because you liberate yourself to do what you love

and generate more income and raise your value in the world.

I learned that when I was about 27 years old.

I'll share a story and maybe you can take some notes from this for sure.

27 years old I was opening up my business,

my practice at the time and I was doing everything,

and I had one assistant finally hired and that delegated a few things,

but I thought that I had to do it all. I kept having these thoughts, 'Well,

by the time I could tell somebody to do it, I could have done it,

or the way they do it may not be as good as the way I do it.'

I had all these traps that I set up for myself,

thinking that it had to be done my way and these kind of things,

instead of results oriented. Well,

I was realizing I was burdening myself because I'm doing a whole bunch of

trivial things and I go,

I went for 10 years of college just to do trivial things, it doesn't make sense.

My job was to do certain high priority things.

So I went out to the bookstore, Walden's bookstore,

which is part of a chain and I got a book called the Time Trap and I devoured

that book and underlined it and dog eared it and marked it.

And then I basically summarized it into a form, one page form. Well,

I multiplied that pages as I went along.

But what I did is I took and I made six columns on a piece of paper.

If you draw five lines equally spaced and have six columns,

in the very far column on the left, I wrote down every action I did in a day,

every action that I do in a day, personal, professional, home,

work, everything,. not broad,

vague generalities and labels like marketing or selling

thing. But every action I did in a day.

And as I was listing that I was realizing, 'wow,

I'm majoring in minors and minoring in majors,

I'm doing a whole lot of stuff that's not really priority here.' And in the

process of doing it, I looked at that and I realized, 'Hmm,

no wonder I'm not as fulfilled and as productive and

generating as much income,

I'm doing a bunch of trivial things thinking I need to do that.' So I made a

list of that and that was eye opening.

And then in the second column I wrote down how much does it produce per hour?

How much does it generate serving people? I don't know about you,

but in my life, when I'm doing something of serving people,

that's making a difference and they're turning around saying thank you for the

product or service that I've helped, I have a lot of fulfillment in that.

That's the most fulfilling thing I get to do.

And when I'm doing something that's very productive,

that's generating a good income,

it means I'm serving more people or I'm serving people more effectively and

that's why they're paying for it. They value what I'm doing.

And if you're not doing something valuable with your motor actions,

you're not going to have fulfillment.

And you're not going to receive more rewards through your sensory experiences.

So I prioritized that list.

I made this giant list and I prioritized it.

And the thing that was the highest priority was the

income per hour and down to lowest priority that didn't produce anything.

And there's a whole lot of those that weren't producing anything.

And I was looking at that and I was going, 'man, I'm devaluing myself,

I'm spending a third of my day doing things that don't make any income,

aren't serving anybody.' They're indirectly serving,

but they're things that I could be releasing. And as I made that list,

I realized the most significant thing I could do is get out and share a message

with people and expose myself and leverage myself.

The second was actually doing the clinical work. So I made this list

and I prioritized it. That was releasing already a whole bunch of freedom,

that gave me freedom and it gave a whole much more energy all of a sudden,

because I saw where I needed to go, what was really priority.

In this third column I wrote down what was the meaning of it.

On a one to 10 scale,

10 being super meaningful and inspiring to do vs 'ugh,

I gotta do it' at the bottom. And I redid the list according to meaning,

because if I'm not inspired by what I'm doing and even though it produces,

but I'm not inspired by it and it doesn't have meaning,

then it's something I feel like I'm having to willpower and motivate myself to

do, but things that are, that are inspiring to do,

So I made a list of all the things that were meaningful down to least meaningful

and I reprioritized that.

And then I looked at what was the most meaningful and the thing that was most

productive, most producing income. And I saw that some were overlaps,

which was great.

So if I concentrate on those things that inspired me most that produce most

income,

I'm going to maximize my potential to earn and my energy level and my

inspiration. And when I do,

and I'm grateful that I'm doing it and I'm loving what I'm doing and I'm

inspired by it and I'm enthused and I'm grateful for it and I'm present with it

and I'm more certain about it, because that's where I've learned the most,

my epistemological knowledge revolves around what's most meaningful and what's

highest in priority and most productive. When I do that, I excel.

In the next column I wrote down, if I was to delegate this,

what would it cost me to delegate these actions? And that's not just salary,

but every cost; training costs, parking costs, equipment costs,

space use and costs, plant maintenance costs, air cost, everything.

And I looked at all the cost of what it would be if I was to hire somebody to do

that, that was capable of doing it greater than I was,

somebody who was very inspired to do it, a qualified person to do it,

an A person, not a Z person.

And I looked at all those costs and I wrote them all down there.

And then I looked at all the spreads between what was,

what it produced vs what it cost. And then I reprioritized that list.

So now I knew what was I was going to be able to extract the most amount of

return out of hiring somebody where I would make the most likely to make

productivity out of it and profit out of somebody that's being hired.

And the next column I wrote down how much time do I actually spend on all these

things per day.

And the last column is the final prioritization of all those variables.

And when I got through that, I'd layered all those actions into layers.

I put them together and I made a job description and I delegated and hired

somebody to delegate the lower priority things to. And every time I did,

I felt lighter. Every time I did, I felt lighter. And I freed myself up.

And sometimes it would take two or three people to get the right person.

But once I got the right person on the bus,

I didn't have to ever think about it again,

they took care of it and I was freed with time and energy to go and do more

productive, more meaningful, more inspiring things.

And my business went from a 970 square foot office with one assistant,

to a 5,000 square foot office with five doctors and 12 staff members in 18

months.

And I was making way more income net and I was delegating the things and freeing

myself up to do what I absolutely love doing,

which is going out and sharing a message and clinically applying people and

researching and sharing new information, clinical information.

What was interesting is, I was freed, I hired people, I helped the economy,

I gave jobs, I increased taxes, I expanded my operation,

I helped the economy in many ways and I helped my life be freed and I was

inspired and I was grateful. And that is the power of prioritization.

That's the psychology prioritization. Now you may think, 'Well,

I can't do that at home. I'm not even working, not producing income.' Well,

I'll tell a story. I was in Washington state.

I was doing my my Breakthrough Experience program, my signature program,

which I do around the world, where I teach the Demartini Method,

which is dissolving emotional baggage and freeing your life up to do something

extraordinary and about values there.

And helping people break through limitations in their life.

And there was a young couple there in their mid thirties I'd guess.

And what's interesting is this woman put her hand up and she says, 'Well,

that's great about prioritization, but, but you know,

I've got three kids now and I was a practitioner, a doctor,

but now I've got three kids. I need to be home and everything else.

And I'm angry because my husband's working and he's free to do all the work,

but he doesn't come home and help me. And I'm doing stuff that you know,

and I'm doing cotton diapers and I'm...' I mean she was doing Ms.

Tofu, what I call Ms. Tofu actions,

doing everything natural and everything for her kids and everything trying to be

an ideal mommy or whatever.

But what she was doing is she was doing low priority things.

Something she could hire somebody for probably 10, 12 in those days, 10 to 12,

maybe 20 to $25 an hour today.

And she was capable as a doctor making 400 to a thousand dollars.

And so she was basically suppressing something that was more productive,

was meaningful and inspiring,

and as a result of it was wanting her husband to come back and do and join her

in stuff she didn't want to do,

and he didn't want to do and because she wasn't working,

he was having to work harder.

And so she was jealous of his work and angry at him and yet angry at herself and

frustrated and then associating it with her kids and sticking her kids in front

of video games so she could get work done that she didn't want to be doing.

She didn't want to be doing cleaning.

She didn't want to be doing washing and stuff like that.

She didn't want to be putting stuff away and make taking. So I told her,

'Why don't you hire somebody?' Said, 'Well,

what do you mean hire somebody?' I said, 'Hire somebody, a nanny to help you,

a cook to take care of you and somebody to go out and shop for you if you need.

Anything that's not inspiring, that's not meaningful, that's not productive,

have help, get some help.

And have more quality time with your child and go and do some work so you feel

like you're not losing all your education and you're making a difference and

feeling a benefit there, the same quality time with your kids,

because many times you're doing stuff and pushing them in front of a video game,

you could have the quality time.' And at first she was a bit resistant because

she'd been reading and injecting the values of a woman who wrote a book who did

not have a degree, doctorate degree,

did not have the power to make all that money and so was doing those things

because she didn't have an alternative and telling people that's how you're

supposed to run your life and be natural at that way.

You can still do all those things for your children, but do high quality,

high productivity activities with your children and not do low priority things

and push them aside while you're trying to get them done.

So what she did is she started to hire somebody and the husband agreed to this

because it was freeing to him because it was an insignificant cost compared to

what she could make if she was to go back to work part-time.

So she started to work eight hours a week, that's it. And if she made $500,

that's $4,000. It was costing her $2,000 for all those things delegated,

she made 4,000 a week. That's $16,000 a month.

In the process of that, she was now ahead financially.

She ended up with more quality time with her kids.

She didn't have to do the trivial things. She was freed up.

She felt her self-worth go back up, because she's doing high priority things.

She's got more time with her kids.

She's letting and having somebody else get a job opportunity. I mean,

once she did that,

she wasn't angry at her husband because now he's working and he's not as working

as much, now he can spend a little bit more time with the kids.

When you stop and look at prioritization, it changes your life.

Prioritization increases the executive function in your brain. When you do,

you have more powerful mastery of your life than if you're sitting there doing

low priority things. So don't trap yourself by low priority actions.

You know,

if you don't fill your day with high priority actions that inspire you,

it's going to fill up with low priority distractions that don't.

If you don't fill your day with productive actions that inspire you,

that are challenges that inspire you,

your day fills up with challenges that don't inspire you.

If you don't fill your day with inspiring people,

it fills up with uninspiring people.

If you don't put your money into higher priority things,

it ends up getting spent on unexpected bills.

I learned many years ago that if I don't take a profit off the top and put it

into asset accumulation right off the top,

that unexpected bills make it where I always pay myself, where you know,

I don't get ahead financially.

The wealthy always paid themselves first and bought assets.

The poor people always paid themselves last and bought liabilities and bought

consumable items to feel better because they're unfulfilled.

They go live vicariously through other people's brands instead of build a brand

around their own life.

So prioritization is essential if you want to master your life.

It helps the brain become executive function. It helps it have more order.

It helps you have less noise in the brain from all the distractions.

It helps you have a greater signal to noise ratio in your consciousness.

It helps you become more clear awareness.

It helps you in business because you're prioritizing your action and you end up

with more profits and serving more people and higher quality.

And when you're in your executive function,

you're more resilient and adaptable and you're loving and you're grateful.

Peter Lynch,

in 'One Up On Wall Street' said that when he buys stock in companies,

he's one of the greatest investors at the time in the nineties, he says,

I'm looking for people that are grateful for their job,

loving what they're doing,

inspired by their vision and enthusiastically working.

When you're in your executive function doing by priority,

that's how you do and that's what causes business to appreciate.

That increases your wealth. That increases your opportunities.

That is something that's certainly not going to hurt the family dynamic.

I am certain that your spouse is going to appreciate you more if you're

generating good income. And socially,

it's going to put a different social standard.

And wealth and health go together, they come from the same root; weal,

which means wellbeing.

And so your health goes up because you're able to get higher quality food,

delegate more things, have less distress, eat higher quality things,

have people have it prepared,

less low priority actions which causes illness, and you're inspired.

So all areas of your life are empowered by prioritization.

That's why I wanted to take the time to go through this topic because it's a

masterpiece if you do it. I've been doing it since age 27,

I'm 67 going on 68 today. I don't do anything but teach, research and write.

That's it. Everything else is delegated. Yep.

Everything else is pretty well delegated.

So I don't have to do those things that I don't love doing.

That way you can do an inspired life.

You're not going to do an inspired life without delegation,

and you're not going to do that without prioritization.

And prioritization you're not going to do without learning about your values.

So go online, do the Value dDetermination process.

Come also and learn how to dissolve the baggage that are the distractions.

In the Breakthrough Experience that's one of the reasons I go through and I show

people how to dissolve any one of those distractions, all infatuation,

resentments, pride, shame, grief, any emotions, anxieties, fears,

phobias, fantasies,

anything that distract you from being present on priority is going to hold you

back, is going to lower your income,

it's going to lower your vitality and lower your self worth.

Anytime you go to higher priority things,

your self worth is going to go up and so is your life.

So I just wanted to take the time to do that.

Please go online and do the Value Determination.

Come to the Breakthrough Experience,

learn how to dissolve the baggage so you can stay on priority and get focused.

And that way you can live on a path to power and you can live a path of mastery

and you can go and do something that's inspiring and walk your talk with

integrity.

And then you end up engaged in your life and you're grateful for your life.

And as a result of that,

I also want to make sure you know about a new seminar that I'm doing called the

Path to Power,

which is increasing your mind's mastery for your greatest life mastery and

power. The reason I'm going over that now,

and I want you to come and do that is because it's so important to do that.

And I'm going to show you how to prioritize,

how to empower the areas of your life,

because any area of your life you don't empower, people are going to overpower.

And so prioritization is essential in all those areas of life.

And I'd like to show you what I've done and how I've done it in order to help

you do what you can do with your life.

There's absolutely no reason why you can't be inspired by your life and grateful

for your life. The only thing stopping you is not knowing how to prioritize,

not knowing how to manage your life,

not knowing how to do what's really important and not know how to communicate

what you do in terms of other people's values to have sustainable fair exchange,

to generate the income, so your vocation and vacation are the same thing,

the path of mastery and power. So please be on the lookout for that,

that's coming and please take advantage of what I just shared.

Maybe listen to this more than once. It makes a difference.

I know it changed my life at age 27 for the last 40 years.

It's allowed me to be financially independent,

allowed me to have a global company.

It's allowed me to have wake up my inspiration and genius.

It's allowed me to have a global family dynamic,

it's helped me have social influence.

It gives me the vitality that I have every week.

And that's definitely something that inspires you.

You deserve to have an inspired life. So take advantage of that.

Come to the upcoming program, the path to mastery and Path to Power.

And I'll look forward to seeing you next week. Thank you for joining me today.

Get back, there and start prioritizing right now. See you next week.