Are you overwhelmed by the speed, noise, and pressure of the season and craving a moment of genuine connection?
In a world obsessed with performance and big gestures, we often forget the transformative power of the quiet, small moments: eye contact, a text, a name used correctly. Heather shares how these micro-moments of humanity can reset our nervous systems and ripple out more powerfully than we realize, especially for parents and allies of LGBTQ+ kids.
✔️ Discover how small acts of kindness affect the brain and body in measurable, healing ways
✔️ Learn a 3-step daily ritual to bring more presence, empathy, and grounding into your life
✔️ Understand why tiny affirming behaviors are life-saving for LGBTQ+ youth
✔️ Challenge the myth that if it’s not big, it doesn’t matter
Press play now to reconnect with what really matters: being human, being kind, and being here.
Key Takeaways
Kindness is not a performance, it’s a nervous system reset for everyone involved
LGBTQ+ youth thrive on small affirming acts, which drastically reduce risk of depression and suicide
Making eye contact, offering silent blessings, or simply listening with presence are radical acts of love
You don’t need to “fix” everything, just feel, notice, and act from empathy
Kindness isn’t weakness. Kindness is healing.
What if kindness wasn't about being noticed, but about noticing? This simple shift in intention can change the way we parent, partner, and participate in the world.
Hi, I’m Heather Hester, and I’m so glad you’re here!
Listen to *NEW* episodes every Tuesday and Friday!
At the heart of my work is a deep commitment to compassion, authenticity, and transformative allyship, especially for those navigating the complexities of parenting LGBTQ+ kids. Through this podcast, speaking, my writing, and the spaces I create, I help people unlearn bias, embrace their full humanity, and foster courageous, compassionate connection.
If you’re in the thick of parenting, allyship, or pioneering a way to lead with love and kindness, I’m here with true, messy, and heart-warming stories, real tools, and grounding support to help you move from fear to fierce, informed action.
Whether you’re listening in, working with me directly, or quietly taking it all in—I see you. And I’m so glad you’re part of this journey.
More Human. More Kind. formerly Just Breathe: Parenting Your LGBTQ Teen is a safe and supportive podcast and space where a mom and mental health advocate offers guidance on parenting with empathy, inclusion, and open-minded allyship, fostering growth, healing, and empowerment within the LGBTQ community—including lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer individuals—while addressing grief, boundaries, education, diversity, human rights, gender identity, sexual orientation, social justice, and the power of human kindness through a lens of ally support and community engagement.
This podcast uses the following third-party services for analysis:
In today's episode, you will discover what one act is, the truest form of being human.
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Welcome to More Human, More Kind, the podcast helping parents of LGBTQ kids move from fear to fierce allyship and feel less alone and more informed so you can protect what matters, raise brave kids, and spark collective change.
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I'm Heather Hester.
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Let's get started.
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In today's episode, you will reconnect with the power of small, intentional acts of humanity in daily life.
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You'll understand why these moments matter, physiologically and emotionally, especially during stress or uncertainty, which we have a lot of right now, Right?
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And you will learn a simple grounding practice to help you stay present enough to notice and create them and make sure you stick around for the unlearn, where we will challenge the myth that only big gestures matter.
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Welcome to More Human, More Kind.
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I am Heather Hester.
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As we move into this season that asks so, so much of our energy and our attention, I want to take a few moments just to slow everything down a little bit.
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Today is about remembering that presence.
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Being present, not being perfect, is what connects us.
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That even the smallest act of humanity can ripple further than we will ever, ever see.
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We live right now in a culture that celebrates a spectacle.
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Think about what you see every single day on social media, in the news, in real life.
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Those, the big moments, the viral good deeds, and the viral everything else.
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The dramatic transformations.
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Being human and being kind isn't about performance.
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It's about the daily act of being present.
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It's that person that holds the door open for you when your hands are full.
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The friend who texts, seemingly always at the right moments.
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I'm thinking about you.
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The stranger who smiles, who makes eye contact with you when you look exhausted.
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Those are seemingly really tiny moments, but they create micro doses of safety and belonging, small physiological reminders that we belong to each other.
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During the holidays, when everything accelerates, the lists, the expectations, the noise, these moments matter even more.
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They're small anchors of calm in a season that can feel overwhelming, especially for families who are navigating change, grief, or identity, or even, frankly, those feeling the real effects of.
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Our current government.
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Research from the Greater Good Science center shows that small acts of kindness activate the vagus nerve, which regulates heart rate, digestion, and emotional balance.
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When we practice or even witness kindness, our nervous systems literally shift from threat to safety.
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In other words, compassion heals both ways.
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Think about that for a moment.
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Showing true kindness to another human being, being the receiver of that kindness, or even watching the entire exchange take place, takes your body from fight or flight into calm and groundedness.
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Dr. Jamil Zaki, who is the author of the War for Kindness, calls this kindness contagion.
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Our brains are wired to mirror empathy.
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When we see someone act with compassion, oxytocin and dopamine rise in both the observer and the receiver.
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But here's the catch.
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We miss these moments when we rush, when we walk around with our faces and our phones or or our heads occupied with the crisis of the day.
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We miss these moments when we disconnect from ourselves and others, when we walk around numb and in a daze.
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And we miss these moments when we try to fix instead of feel.
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I know feeling can be messy and uncomfortable, but that is where the magic is.
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During stressful moments or seasons, as we are in right now, our brains narrow focus, scanning for danger, not connection.
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That's why it takes intentional slowing to notice humanity again.
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So how can we interrupt this?
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Maybe it starts with the simple act of making eye contact.
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So pause right now, wherever you are, if you can, and take a slow, deep breath.
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Think of one person you passed by today without really seeing them, and picture their face.
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Now imagine offering them one silent blessing, such as, may you feel safe today.
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Maybe you take this blessing or you find your own and you carry it forward.
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That small interact shifts everything.
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And that's how humanity begins to heal.
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For parents, especially those who are raising LGBTQ kids, these micro moments are everything.
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They're how safety gets built.
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It's the quiet.
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I love you exactly as you are whispered before school.
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It's asking for or using pronouns without making it a big deal.
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It's listening to a hard conversation.
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That's it.
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Just listening.
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Just be present.
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Each one of these is a micro dose of belonging.
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Dr. Caitlin Ryan's research at the Family Acceptance Project shows that small affirming behaviors from parents, even subtle ones, like using correct names or standing up for a child once significantly lower depression and suicide risk in LGBTQ youth.
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That's not small.
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That's life giving, life saving, and so easy to do.
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Think of the power of these very small acts as you move through the gatherings of the holidays.
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These tiny gestures matter deeply.
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They build trust.
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They regulate nervous systems, and.
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And they say, you are safe right here with me.
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Try this simple three step grounding ritual this week.
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First step, pause once a day, Stop mid scroll or mid commute, and ask who around me could use a little kindness right now?
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Maybe it's your barista or your teenager or even yourself.
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Second step is to offer whatever that is immediately.
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A text, a smile, a compliment, a quiet word.
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It doesn't have to be perfectly worded, just done.
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That person that popped in your head?
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Text them.
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The cashier at the grocery store.
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Ask them how their day is.
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Instead of scrolling through your phone.
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Look out at the world while you're walking around.
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You will be surprised at what you see and the ways that you will connect.
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And the third step is to reflect before bed, ask yourself, when did I feel most human today?
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And notice what moments made your body exhale.
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Studies show that witnessing or performing even one small act of kindness increases oxytocin and serotonin levels for hours, improving sleep and emotional regulation.
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Kindness is literally good medicine for your body, your mind, and your relationships.
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Last week, I watched as an older man ahead of me in line at my favorite coffee shop quietly paid for the woman behind him.
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She didn't even notice him doing it when she reached the counter.
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Confused, the barista said, someone just wanted you to have a good day.
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She looked around to thank this kind soul that he was already in the parking lot getting into his car.
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The smile on her face spoke volumes, and that feeling of calm rippled to all of us who were paying attention.
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There was no speech, no spotlight.
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Just one human choosing a small act of humanity.
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So here's your one small act for this week.
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Look for one place to interrupt autopilot with empathy.
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Maybe you ask your teen, what's something that would make you feel seen this week?
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Maybe you let someone merge ahead of you in traffic without the eye roll or the swearing.
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Or maybe you leave a note of encouragement for a coworker.
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Remember, it's not about grand gestures.
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It's about practice, daily rehumanization.
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Today's Unlearned is about letting go of the idea that only big actions matter in a world of bigger is better and other excess.
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We've been told, if you can't do something huge, don't bother.
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That seems to be all that's coming out of this current administration, right?
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Excess.
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But the truth is, every small act tilts the balance toward good.
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What if kindness wasn't about being noticed, but about noticing?
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This week, do one anonymous act of kindness.
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Not for credit or acknowledgment.
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Let it be quiet, sacred, even unseen.
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That is how light spreads.
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When we unlearn this myth of grandeur, we make space for grace and rediscover how much power a single human moment can hold.
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Thank you for pausing with me today for this reflection.
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Keep noticing, keep breathing, and keep offering.
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Those small acts, they add up quietly but powerfully to the world.
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We all want to live in.
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They counter the noise, the cruelty, and the dehumanization that threatens to harden us.
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Remember that new episodes of More Human, More Kind drop every Tuesday and Friday, so be sure to follow and subscribe so you never miss an episode.
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And if you're ready to release fear, shame, and outdated patterns in your own life, I'm accepting a few private clients right now.
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You can learn more at morehumanmorekind.
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Com.
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Until next time, keep practicing the small, because those quiet moments are how love moves through the world.
