Have you ever wondered how you’d know if what you’re experiencing after childbirth is “normal” or something more serious like postpartum depression?

In this honest episode of the Collide Podcast, we sit down with Therapist Rachael Elmore to talk about her journey through postpartum depression and how she found healing. She shares about the bravery it took to ask for help, the emotional and spiritual needs of new moms, and the importance of not walking this road alone. Whether you’re a new parent feeling overwhelmed, someone supporting a loved one, or simply curious about the realities of postpartum mental health, this episode will remind you that hope and healing are possible.

Meet Rachael Elmore

Rachael is a licensed clinical mental health counselor supervisor, award-winning author, and expert speaker with more than 20 years of experience in the counseling field. After overcoming postpartum depression herself in 2012, she wrote the book she wished had been available to her: A Mom is Born: Biblical Wisdom and Practical Advice for Taking Care of Yourself and Your New Baby. Rachael owns a thriving counseling practice in Charlotte, NC, and has helped thousands of people navigate parenthood. She is passionate about encouraging men and women to pursue emotional health and to walk by faith even in seasons of struggle. Her story is a powerful example of resilience, courage, and faith in the midst of hardship.

In This Episode, You’ll Learn

• What postpartum depression can look like and how to spot the signs
• Why it takes courage to ask for help and why that bravery matters
• How the transition into motherhood impacts mental, emotional, and spiritual health
• Why community and support are vital for new parents
• Practical wisdom and biblical encouragement for moms navigating the postpartum season

How This Episode Will Encourage You

If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed, isolated, or unsure of how to navigate the transition into motherhood, this episode will give you both hope and help. You’ll be reminded that you don’t have to do it alone, and that with support, faith, and honesty, healing is possible.

Check Out These Resources Inspired by This Episode

Collide Counseling Bundle – An online course that addresses 12 of the most common struggles women bring to counseling, this bundle offers practical tools, expert guidance, and encouragement from licensed mental health professionals. Complete with a beautifully designed printed workbook mailed to your door, it provides exercises, reflection space, and resources to support your emotional and spiritual healing.

Connect with Rachael - Website | Instagram | Facebook

Book - A Mom is Born

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Hey there. Welcome to the Collide Podcast.

This is Willow, and I am so glad I get to hang out with you today and hand you this interview I just had with Rachael Elmore. She is a licensed clinical mental health counselor and an author.

And God certainly showed up in the midst of her postpartum depression and now uses her as a voice to help other women who are going through the same thing.

And I don't know today if you are pregnant, if you're about to have a baby, if you just had a baby, or you have a friend or a daughter who's having a baby, but either way, I realized while I was interviewing Rachael that this was actually such helpful advice, not only for women who are going through postpartum, but for those of us who care about our women in our life who just had babies.

She gives advice on what to look for to help them, but also some of her advice is so applicable to just helping women in general when they're going through a tough season. So I hope you take a listen and that you're encouraged and that you will share this with a woman who needs to hear what Rachael has to say.

Take a listen, Rachel. It's so fun to have you joining me today from North Carolina. You're a licensed clinical mental health counselor.

You are a speaker, you're an award winning author. You authored the book A Mom Is Born. Biblical Wisdom and practical advice for taking care of yourself and your new baby.

I have a million things I want to ask you, but first of all, I just want to thank you for hopping on today.

Well, thank you for having me. I'm pretty stoked to be here.

I love it. You do such important work. I'm such a big fan of therapy and therapists, and I really think that your ministers.

God's using you to bring healing in people's lives. And I'm so curious, what made you go into this line of work?

Okay, well, I love that question, but we are wounded healers for sure. And I, I remember being very little and unlike a lot of people, maybe a lot of people had their calling at a.

As a very young child, but I was very young and my parents would say, they would point out that people randomly would come up to me and just start telling me their life story and like, just, you know, at the grocery store and not, not in a bad way, but just like, they would just kind of start telling me their life. And there's just something about me that in a really great way, I love people's stories.

I've never met Somebody who I just wasn't just enamored and wanted to know everything about them, wanted to know their soul and wanted to help. And I've been like that ever since I can remember. And so as I was growing up, I was scared of the schooling part of it.

I went through eight years of schooling to have the job that I have. And when I was in college, I kind of have that classic story of I was in an HR major at NC State University. Shout out to North Carolina there. Yeah.

And I went through a bad breakup and woke up one morning and my faith was really strong, but with the guy that I thought, you know, that this might be it, that this was the one, and. And woke up one morning and I couldn't get out of bed.

And I called my mom, who is such a lover of Jesus, such a strong Christian, and she's like, let's get you in with a Christian counselor. And so it was like that week I saw my first counselor and an amazing Christian counselor.

And I remember sitting in that session a feeling like seen and heard and just love the marriage of counseling with our faith. It's just, it's a natural thing that comes together, that heals.

And me receiving that healing and then just being almost like desperate to give it to everybody else in this world. So I kind of fall into that wounded healer of just receiving that and then wanting to give it to everyone else too.

I love that so much. Isn't that how God works, where he does something in our lives and it's like, we can't, we can't help but want to tell people.

Like, it reminds me of the woman at the well in John 4 where she has this life changing collision with Jesus and it changed her so much that she had to run and tell her entire city about this Jesus she just ran into. And she's like, come and see this man. And then, you know, she starts a revival in her city.

But I love that that's so true of God that he met you in that really hard space. Space and did something really beautiful that would help other people in hard spaces.

What's it been like for you to give God your yes and follow that leading in your life and say, okay, I want to go to school for that. I want to sacrifice. I want to invest in other people. You've been doing it for a lot of years now.

So looking back to that moment where you got that passion, what have you seen God do over the years?

Oh, my gosh, nobody's ever asked me that. Like, I'm A little too excited right now. I love that question. I love that question. So what has it been like?

It's been a wild ride, but it was really interesting. My master's program was a.

It's a. I went to Gordon Conwell and it's a dual degree master's where we have to have basically like a master's in theology as well.

And while I'm no theologian, I got to really dive into a whole class that was centered around the theology of the call and the theology of what it is like to be called to something and. And what it's like to have people affirm your call and then.

And I don't want to dive into that today because I know that's a whole other conversation. But it was cool that while I was questioning my own calling because I just. I came from a little bit about my story. I came from very poor beginnings.

I could not afford to go to school or graduate school. I still don't really know how I paid for it. I full time throughout graduate school.

And so with that, you know, I'm in grad school praying because at this point, most of my friends are out of college and they're making real money. And a part of my degree program is you work for free for several years before you ever receive a dime.

That's part of how you get a license in the state that I'm licensed in. And so it's. It's something that you kind of have to put in your brass tax. Not quite like a. Like a. A residency program, but still.

And so it's just been amazing to go through it. I didn't feel like I really questioned it a ton. It was just hard, honestly, just the practical standpoint.

I saw clients a lot of today and was a mom in between as well. And so I just have the coolest job in the world. I really do.

I love that. That's so cool.

I think that's sometimes kind of this great mix of what happens when the Lord meets you in the midst of your story and does something, gives you a passion and a leading and you follow it. And he sort of merges what you are naturally good at with your passion.

I Always have told my kids, if you something that you're good at and you're passionate about, you're one of the luckiest people in the world. So you. You happen to be one of the luckiest people in the world there. Rachel, you wrote a book, which it seems like you didn't set out to do.

It seems like you wrote it from a place of your own experience. Can you tell us about that?

Yes. So I.

He said, yes, you are. And I was like, what would I write a book on? He was like, your postpartum depression and anxiety.

There definitely wasn't and still isn't really a book on it, except mine, which is rare to be able to say that there definitely wasn't a book from a Christian perspective. And so I decided I went to see three different counselors, and I'm already at this point when I had my postpartum.

I would like to see a pretty established counselor in the area, have my own practice. And I went to three counselors that were like, we don't know how to help you. And I decided that that wasn't good enough.

And so I spent the last decade writing the treatment plan that was not there for me. So it's the treatment plan that I've used thousands of times. And so I can't see every referral that I get.

And look, I'm honored with every referral I ever get. I always am. It is such a privilege and an honor that somebody sends somebody in their heart to me.

But I can't see every person, but I can hand them a cheat book and say, hey, here's a good starting point. And I been able to hand it to so many counselors. My OB GYNs in Charlotte, they use it. And it's just been exciting to offer that resource that just.

It wasn't there for me. And I just decided that that wasn't good enough.

Hmm.

So take us back to that hard season, because I think for a lot of women, they can't even recognize they have postpartum were you able to sort of take inventory of what was going on in you and go, oh, I think this is postpartum, or did you just not feel great and you sought counseling and were hitting dead ends?

And so I. I am very thankful that I knew that it was not normal and that I knew enough, obviously, clinically speaking, to say, this isn't me, and that I wasn't okay. And so with postpartum symptoms, we. I always like to say we are sisters. We're not twins. So everybody's experience is a little different.

I would say the average client that comes to me, a lot of times their onset of symptoms is like, five months is when they realize, like, their baby's five months old, they might realize, I think I have some postpartum anxiety. And so we're all different. And then that's okay. Mine was a very sudden onset. So it was three weeks after I'd given birth to my oldest son.

And for me, it was almost like a light switch where I was kind of. I was. I don't want to be super triggering, but I was afraid to pick him up. And he had a dairy allergy that we did not know about. And he's so funny.

He's 13 now. He's always like, hey, mom, tell people I'm cool now. I'm like, yeah, he's a good kid now, but he had a dairy allergy.

Breastfeeding did not go well for me at all, which was unfortunate. And, you know, it was just a really, really rough season.

And so there was one day, three weeks from when I gave birth, where I was like, I'm not okay. And I rolled over. I was in our bed, and Mitch was asleep. My husband was asleep next to me. And I was like, we need to call my doctor.

And I felt very, very different. And medication, I don't dive right in, but it's not for everybody.

But it was a very humbling thing for me because I had never been on any sort of medication for anything like that before. And while I regularly recommend it for people, I feel kind of like a fraud, because even back then, I was like, does it really work?

Does it really help? And, ooh. I had a. Like a big slice of humble pie because God was like, let me just Let me show you, daughter. Like, let me. I love you.

I'm going to show you. And so it's hard to walk through that road.

But I do think there's so much purpose in my story, purpose in my pain, to be able to at least prevent that pain or help with that pain for other women.

And I've already been able to hear from, you know, thousands of women that have said, hey, I, like, I'm okay because I. I was pregnant and I read your book, or I'm feeling better. I have hope, or, I mean, and that's. That's what it's all about. So I did know, and so many women don't. And I always like to say it's one in five.

One in five women is diagnosable for a postpartum or perinatal mood disorder. And that's. That's substantial. And so the reason that we're not looking at it, I think that we are in survival mode.

But it's good to just not assume that maybe the girl in our Bible study might have it or someone that we care about that just had a baby. But it's good to just kind of be on the lookout, because it's definitely there. People are talking about it more and more, but still back.

Back, say, back in my day, but 13 years ago, other than maybe, like, one celebrity, nobody was talking about it, and nobody was talking about it from a biblical perspective, at least on a large scale.

So I have so many things to ask you, but one of the things I want to ask you, you kind of passed by this part of your story, but to me, you're laying in your bed and you lean over and you say to your husband, I'm not okay. I need to call my doctor. That's a very. That's a pivotal moment. That's a very brave thing to do.

That's something that many of us have a hard time doing, is admitting somehow. It's hard to admit that it almost feels like somehow we're a failure as a mom if we can't just pull through, do the thing, not need any help.

When you think about women listening, who...They're there, they're laying in the bed, but they haven't reached over to anyone and said, I need help. What's your encouragement to them?

Yes. And I think it is a big moment, and I want that woman to understand that it's not rational, it's chemical.

And while everything is absolutely spiritual in nature, in this world that we live in and God has a hand in all of it, that there is so much help out there.

And if you're crying all the time and too anxious to hold your baby that maybe you just need to talk to somebody or maybe you need a little bit of extra help, you probably. I mean, like, come on, you definitely need some sleep.

That's been a big issue, as, I mean, we see, like, mothers of multiples are so much more likely to have postpartum depression and anxiety. And it's just, I mean, the lack of sleep, the bigger hormonal shift. And I think it's okay to assume that there's going to be some complications with.

The biggest change that happens to the human body is actually childbirth. I mean, no bigger hormonal change ever happens than right when we. Right after we give birth.

And so, like, pregnancy is a little bit of a slower onset, the rush of hormones, but right after we have a baby, it's like we expect us to just bounce back and just hop into form and not be emotional.

And that it's normal to feel bad all the time and you going to feel tired, but feeling that sad most of the days for three weeks, that is not normal, my friend.

Mm. You know what's interesting? As you're talking, I'm taking notes. I think it's really interesting you're talking about this in such a gracious way.

You're normalizing, guys, this is huge. This is a huge thing your body goes through, your mind goes through, your life goes through.

Like, give yourself permission to understand how big this is one of the things I remember, and my kids are, you know, 19 and 22 now, but I think there's this thing where I looked around at all my peer moms, and they looked like they were rocking it. And.

And so when I felt like I wasn't rocking it, I felt like something was, like, intrinsically wrong with me as a mom, and I was hesitant to bring it up to them because somehow it felt like it was going to highlight there's something wrong with me as a mom. And then I would come to find out, like, a year, two years later, my girlfriends would be like, oh, no. I was crying in my car outside Target.

I felt like I was a failure because I couldn't breastfeed. I couldn't stop crying. I was exhausted.

And so I think there's something interesting about how you can often feel like you're the only one struggling, because a lot of us are struggling silently.

But if we actually started admitting to each other that this is just like you're just normalizing it, you're saying, this is huge, it's big, it's hard, then how could that help us?

Yeah, I think that it's been really interesting being on this journey where I started to really be vocal about my postpartum. And I was in the beginning because I had to have Help I don't have. My family does not live local.

And I had to get help from honestly just women within my church. A lot of em, I didn't even know that. Just like they came and ministered to me. And I remember thinking, well, that's it. My career's over.

Never getting another referral because everyone's going to think, like, you know, I'm broken, that she can't even take care of herself. And the irony of that is, like, the way God worked through that, that's not at all what happened with my career.

In fact, I would say that, you know, if anything, I feel like what I've. The work I've gotten to do has gotten so much bigger.

And so, you know, I would want women to know that we've got to normalize the fact that we're not meant to just go through this alone.

And the more that we go through it alone, rather than more like in a community type of fashion where we realize that these thoughts and these feelings and some of these, like, dark moments are what so many of us experience, the more that we speak out about what we're going through. I believe we take so much power away from. From the enemy because we know, like, what we keep covered and what we keep hidden.

I feel in many times biblically too, gives the enemy so much power. And I just decided that I wasn't going to do that anymore. And so it's weird. I talk about being proud of my lack of pride. Like, I'm.

I'm just not a prideful person at all. Like, I kind of. It'd be cool if I was, like, more confident and all that, but I think that I'm.

I'm proud of the fact that, like, if people want to and I mean, nobody's really responding that way.

If they want to look down on me for being like, yeah, man, it was really, really hard, and I love my baby more than any, but I went through all of this horrible stuff. And in general, that was not my experience.

I mean, some people, like, were trying to understand when I started to become more vocal, but the more we talk about it, the more people are going to say, oh, of course, yeah, Postpartum, one in four, one in five. We're seeing. I mean, some of the new numbers are saying one in four.

And so if we know it's that, if we normalize it and say that, it's not something to be afraid of, and it definitely doesn't mean that you're not a good mom. I think I remember in a Very well meaning friend. We've talked about it since. She's fine with me talking about on podcast.

She said, oh, is that when you don't like your baby? And she just was trying to understand and she wasn't a mother at that time. And I was like, no, it's not that. And I was not frustrated with her.

But I feel like at the time, like a lot of just the talk around postpartum was kind of like it painted some of that picture and it just had nothing to do. I loved my son more than anything. I mean, just loved him, couldn't get enough of him.

But I was still having these haunting anxiety fits and fears and couldn't stop crying for no reason. And I just felt like nothing made me smile. Like, even the thought of like fireworks or the beach.

Like, I just couldn't get a smile out of those thoughts. And so with that, the more we talk about these things, the more we realize, like, okay, there's Rachel.

I'm a licensed counselor. My kids are okay. They're healthy. I made it. I made it through the grace of God. I made it through the grace of God.

But that maybe it doesn't mean you're a bad mom. And I feel like that's part of the stigma. I would love to just, let's get rid of it of just. That has nothing to do with. Right. Let's just bust it.

Let's just break that in half and step on it.

Yeah. And it's. And my kids are just happy, healthy kids. And they, you know, I just had a hard time learning to become a mom.

And that's really makes a lot of sense. It's really normal.

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Yeah. And it's My kids are just happy, healthy kids. And they, you know, I just had a hard time learning to become a mom.

And that really makes a lot of sense. It's really normal.

There are certainly going to be women listening who didn't just have a baby, but they're looking around at their friends and you're saying, one in four, one in five. What are some things we can look for in our girlfriends who just had babies?

And then if we think, wow, they might be struggling, what are some helpful ways to invite them to get help?

I think we. We've got to go beyond a text. We've got to go beyond the text messages. Girl. I, like, lied on my text messages. I did. I was like, I'm fine.

I don't know. I just thought, I'm the worst mom in the world. Like, that's all.

Because I kept texting other friends of mine that had just had babies, and they weren't. Especially. They weren't. I kept comparing, which wasn't good. Like the fact I couldn't produce milk and.

And I just thought, oh, I'm just alone and this is. This is bad. And luckily, I didn't stay through the grace of God. I didn't stay quiet. But I think that we've got to go past a text.

And most moms will say that they. I mean, we can kind of fib through our text messages. We can say, oh, we're fine and we're not. And that's why I want moms.

If you're, you know, pregnant or expecting, it's okay to tell the truth. It's okay to say I'm okay, but I'm also, like, not okay. Like, I'm low key. Not okay. Like I'm safe. But I do need help.

I think that, I mean, I had people and I'm so thankful that just, like, I know deep breath just stopped by and brought me food and like, hey, Rachel, how are you?

And people that came over and actually, like, physically sat and prayed with me because I think, you know, I think the text messages are hard or the, you know, if I look back on my Facebook feed, I was posting adorable pictures of my baby. But behind that were so many tears and so much struggling. So I think we.

It's not our job to, like, screen for these things, but I feel like the church, we're like the front lines in so many ways of just saying, bring her a meal and see how she's done doing. If she's withdrawn and she's just not, like, responding to texts and she's not looking excited about anything in the future.

And if she's like that for a few weeks, there might be something going on.

And, yes, that's not our job to be everybody's counselor, but, my goodness, it's time to engage somebody like me, one of your ministry leaders, a pastor. I mean, there's so postpartum support international, like, to engage somebody like us to be able to say, hey, let's help.

There's a lot of resources out there to say there's hope for her to feel so much better.

Mm.

I remember sitting in a doctor's office right after I had my son Aiden, and it had been a couple weeks, and the doctor asked me how I was doing, and I'm like, I can't stop crying. And the doctor said, do you think you have postpartum? And I actually was like, I'm just so tired. Like, I just. And my baby almost died.

And so there's so many. Like, our stories are so complex. There's, like, this. The identity shift from, like, you know, if you've left your job or you're.

You're used to being around adults all day, or there's just so many things that play a role in. In it.

So it's so helpful to have someone like you or a doctor or a friend to be able to say, there's a lot here I'm going through that's new and hard, and I need help. And I love that that's your. Your encouragement of women. Your book A Mom is bor to the emotional and spiritual needs of new moms. I'm curious.

What are some of those needs for us?

Well, there. There's a lot of needs. And. And we like to.

If anybody's ever taken a psychology course, you would have learned about a guy named Abraham Maslow, and he had his hierarchy of needs. And it's kind of like a pyramid, like the food pyramid, but as five parts. And, you know, the bottom of it's physical.

And the idea is you have to meet each rung of the ladder before you can move up.

And so a mom isn't going to be concerned about whether or not maybe a friend is upset with her or hurt her feelings if she's not had sleep for 64 hours. True story. That's. A friend of mine did not sleep for 64 hours. We literally took her baby for her, obviously, with lots of permission.

And she went to a hotel because she was just. We were like, you have to go sleep. You have to sleep. And so with that, we've got to meet the physical needs first. And I really appreciated people.

I had a few friends, like, watch my baby overnight a couple times for me. And I know that we can't always do that, but to take over a feeding and because I didn't need. I needed the food. Yes. But I also just needed the sleep.

And so just making sure she's eating, Making sure that because it was the first time in my life I ever forgot to eat, that's not a part of me. Like, I love food. And so it was weird to have someone handle me an apple and say, eat, eat.

And so looking out for those physical needs and then really looking at how we can meet her social belongingness needs, affirming that what she's feeling is really normal. I've yet to hear something that a postpartum mom was going through that I was like, oh, I've never heard of that.

It's almost always the same, you know, eight or ten sets of thoughts and fears that plague us all.

And so with that, the more that we just say, hey, like, it's okay to not be okay and I'm here, and let me, like, give you, like, resources and let me.

Even though I know in the first weeks that's not going to be the desired outcome at the moment, but just be able to say, like, give her things to look forward to is probably one of my favorite things, because I remember people saying, rachel, it's going to get better. Or like, this too shall pass. That meant nothing to me back then, but just saying, like, hey, Rachel, how about the beach next year? Let's plan a trip.

And I was like, we can't afford it. And a friend of mine was like, we're going to plan it anyways on Pinterest and we're going to have some fun.

And just that started to give me a little bit of the spark back and just thinking that I had something to look forward to.

And there's something about as much as you're suffering for somebody else to look at you, even in person or facetime, but to look at you and you can tell that they hurt because you're hurting people. I mean, I know that God healed me. I know medication healed me. I know therapy healed me.

But I believe that the only thing that really heals grief is love.

And watching people come around me, even people I didn't know that well and mentor me and tell me they would come over and bring me, like, tacos and tell me I was doing a good job with my baby, that healed me. It did Because I mattered enough where people saw me in my pain. And, gosh, I get choked up even talking about it. Is it.

You know, you feel so invisible. Everyone's looking at the baby everyone's looking at. Or your older child, or everyone's asking, hey, dad, how's it hanging?

And it's like I felt so invisible. And then I didn't feel invisible.

And I knew that even though I didn't feel strong enough, I knew people were pouring into me and that God was using his people to rally around me and to make me feel seen. Even in my pain, I knew I wasn't alone. And it made it. That's when I felt like I could start.

Like I was strong enough to, like, lean back into him again, which was just so, so important. So his people are what are so powerful in this. And I know. We know. Ask for help. Right? Ask for help.

But the way that I talk about my book and the way that I talk about helping, it's just very practical in saying it's gotta go beyond a text. Hey, a text is great. Don't. I'm not dogging that. But just saying, like, hold her baby and bring her snack. That's a good start.

And give her something to look forward to. I had a girl in my church who brought her guitar over and just played music. She just played worship songs. I barely knew her.

She was like a very young musician.

Yeah. I mean, I'll never forget the people that came and loved over me. I mean, they healed me.

And I know they would say, oh, I just came over and hung out with you. They brought their kids. It was fine. And I didn't clean my house. I didn't put on makeup. I just. I just showed up. And they showed up, too.

And I'm just so thankful that they kept knocking, that they didn't give up on me. And I. Again, I'm not from Charlotte, so that truly was just. I mean, that was the Lord just providing that for me. And an amazing church family, too.

I think, listening to you, I'm thinking of a few things that I really love about your message.

One is that I know you wrote this book with moms in mind who have postpartum, but the things you're talking about are actually really helpful to hear in order to be a good friend to someone who might have postpartum.

And I'm also thinking as you're talking, some of your advice is just plain good advice to carry out for people who might be depressed, who might be grieving, who might be having a Hard time. I mean, literally those last pieces of advice you just gave about make sure she eating, plan joy, plan something.

She can be excited about all these things or something that could help even a woman who has a 15 year old who's struggling. So I love that advice so much. Yeah.

Yeah. Well, thank you. And I think, you know, it, it is, you know it is.

It's, it's, it is similar advice I would give to a lot of people who are trying to love somebody that's suffering. And suffering means a lot of different things, but it's like you point them to God.

But also like we look at how Jesus walked this earth and he loved people well, he loved people so well to where the woman at the well could not stop from squealing and joyously singing his name and she just had to tell everyone about him. And that's how I feel about this message.

It's how I feel about God's love and carrying each other's burdens and loving each other well with mental health, if I can go through it and love people well and say, hey, here's what worked for me and here's what's worked for a few thousand women I know, then that's, I don't know, it's worth it. And that's the goal. But I hear a lot of feedback like that. And I've got grandmothers reading the book and ministry leaders and things like that.

It's very humbling where I'm just like, oh, that's so cool. It's a bigger message than not just to say just moms, but it is a bigger message than that.

Yeah, for sure. I read a little bit about you and a bio year you or your people sent to us.

And at the end it says, life is hard, marriage is challenging, navigating singlehood is complicated. Parenting is never easy. Let me help you through this process. Your family is worth it. You're worth it.

I think there are some women listening who aren't convinced that they're worthy of help and healing.

And I wonder, as we kind of come to a close today on this podcast, if you have a word of encouragement about why they're, they and their family are worth a yes to their healing. Yeah.

Oh, what a good question. Oh, that. It's like almost like a therapy question you just asked me.

And, and it's a deep one, but I think it's good to say, maybe not to a new mom, but in general, like, what makes us worthy of love. And, and there's just one thing that makes Us worthy of love. And that's Jesus. And it's because he said so.

And we are beautiful and we are made saints and we are heirs and we are adopted and we are, we are daughters of a king. I mean, like, I could go on and on and all the things that God says about us, but God says you have value because he says so.

So God says that my breath will leave my body and go back in in just a minute because he says so. So you have value, dear sister, whoever is listening, you have value because he says so. And that's a lot. Not because a parent maybe has let you down.

I've definitely walked that road. I have no relationship with my biological father because of that. And I've lived a lot of my life and feeling not worthy.

And look, I know that so many women may not feel that in this moment of feeling. Yes, now, Rachel, because you've said that I feel worthy. I understand that. I understand that. But we have to keep hope.

And even if someone listening doesn't feel like they have that feeling of worth right now, let someone who loves you carry that worth for you for just a minute. Let somebody sit beside you and look into their eyes and see that they think you're worthy. And look, I had to look for people to do that. I did.

And I have a lot of people who love me, but I had to find new people because I'm not from this area. I had to find new people to look at me and show me that I was worthy of love.

But people showing up with a casserole or meatball subs show you that you're worthy of love. Taking a little bit of time. And I talk a lot about three minute self care. To take care of yourself teaches your body that you're worthy of love.

Taking care of the temple that God gave you, even though it does not feel like a temple after we have a baby.

And so we take these little steps to start to say, even if I don't feel worthy, I'm going to start choosing to live in a way that God says I'm worthy. And the mind, because of the plasticity of the brain, it does catch up with the heart.

And it starts to make that connection where we start to feel worthy. So it may seem silly of like, hey, you need to ask your friends to text you, hey, tell them I need you to tell me once a week why I'm a good mom.

And you're going to look at it and read it and you're going to read scripture and you can Read scripture of yourself, even if you don't feel like it. But watching the mind and the heart connect, because it does take a little bit to connect. It's a really, really beautiful and powerful thing.

And when you feel that you're not worthy, seek somebody that loves Jesus fiercely. Ask them if you're worthy and look in their eyes and see how they look at you. Let them pray over you. And if they won't, give someone else a call.

Rachel, thank you so much for being so brave to let God use your life and your story and your the hardship and the moments you felt unworthy and you felt down and depressed and you felt like you weren't a good mom. Let God use all of those things to help other women. And I'm just so grateful for you and what you're doing.

I know there's going to be people who want to connect with you and grab your book, A Mom is Born. How can they do that?

So it's available everywhere, books are sold. So but you know, Amazon, I highly recommend my audiobook which obviously moms arms are busy. So like I think it's a free audible download.

A lot of the times it's free on Spotify. So yes, I'd love for you to buy my book, but I also absolutely just want anyone that needs it to have it.

And so send your friend an audible credit and let her download it and listen to it. And they actually let me read it, which I love that I get to speak these words over these women and I get to read these prayers over the women.

So the book is A Mom is Born. I'm Rachael Elmore. I'm at RACHAELELMORE.COM and it's R A C H A E L instead of E L. rachaelelmore.com I'm on Instagram @rachaelhuntelmore.

I'm pretty easy to find and please connect with me and let me know how I can serve you better.

Rachel, thank you for being on the podcast.

Thank you.

Friend. If you're listening, my hope is that you will hear loud and clear. You are worth help and you are worth healing.

And if you are doubting that in any way, shape or form, I want to slow down just for this moment. And I want to remind you that you are a child of God, that you are God's workmanship, that you're his creation, that you are here for a purpose.

Do not forget how worthy you are, friend. And as hard as it is to admit that you might need help, say yes to getting help today.

And if you have a friend who might need help, I want to encourage you to be brave and reach out and be the kind of friend who enters in and invites your friends to say yes to healing too. Because they're worth it and you know they are. I know you know that, so that's my encouragement to you.

One way you can do that is share this episode with a woman who needs to hear it today. Such an easy thing to do that blesses someone else friend. Keep colliding and we'll catch you next week.