FEAR has such an impact on our lives, it controls not only what we do but what we don't do too.

In this episode, I share my journey through fear and as I learn how to spot fear and overcome it too.

I share practical ways to understand fear and elements that create fear.

0:00 Introduction

0:37 What is fear?

2:42 What people say about fear on Facebook

3:57 What do people say about fear on LinkedIn?

4:45 How do I learn about fear?

6:00 Dr. Wayne Dyer says that "When you are in fear there is no room for love, and when you are in love there is no room for fear".

7:25 What fear really is?

7:32 Fear needs two things

7:44 Fear is about Time

7:52 Fear is always about the future

8:15 Fear is always your imagination

8:42 Fear is always about something bigger than you

10:01 How knowing about your fear is a good thing?

11:00 How to overcome fear?

12:17 How fear crippled me?

14:28 How do I recognize and overcome fear?

15:16 Steps to overcome fear

17:16 Haafiz says "Fear is the cheapest room you have in your house..."

17:22 This is what Rumi says about fear "On what fear is, it's non-acceptance of the uncertainty..."

19:08 Dr. Wayne Dyer says "If you knew who walked beside you..."

19:40 Ram Dass' poem on Fear and Love

21:50 Thank You

22:27 Ending

Please have a listen and let me know what your takeaway is and if this episode adds any value, do share it with others.

Connecting with Manpreet

https://linktr.ee/themanpreetbawa

Welcome everyone.

Today's special,

you know, if you take away

even 2% of today's talk

is going to change your life,

I promise you

it will because it changed my life.

And you know, I'm here today

standing with you

on this podcast

because of some of the tools that I use

to get where I am.

So without wasting time.

I'm going to dive right into it.

Today, we're going to talk about fear.

Have you ever been afraid of anything

or have any kind of fear, right?

I think most of us will say yes,

in fact,

everybody should be raising hands

because different times of our life,

we have been afraid of something,

even if you know

we have

done things

despite of the fear we have been right.

A fear is

something that we

deal with day in, day out.

And you know, when we are born

as babies, we were afraid of loud sounds.

And when we grew up,

there were different things

that we saw

in our environment, in our life

that made us afraid,

whether it was sound, uncertainty,

you know, parents,

teachers.

Brothers, sisters, elder siblings,

whatever it is that I, we grew up

with the flu, in fact, you know,

the science says that we are only born

with one fear that is of sound.

The rest of the fear

we learn in this life, we adapt.

As we grow,

our fear grows in different areas.

And, I didn't know that about myself,

but now I see that in my children,

as they grow up into different ages

from the babies.

to now six years old,

I see them developing different fears.

Obviously, some of the fears

we have instilled in them right

because we wanted them to

obey us.

Or, you know, at times you

when you want to have

some discipline, you

do whatever you can.

And even though

you don't want it as a parent,

but you inevitably end up

developing a fear in them

so that they are able to listen

and afraid

or no,

do not do something

that is a risk to them.

So we develop that fear.

Was, you know.

You know,

what's really interesting is yesterday

only I made a post on Facebook group

in a private community and asked people

what what is their greatest fear?

What are they afraid of?

What keeps them up at the night

kind of thing, I made a question.

And immediately

people started interacting,

telling different answers

of what they are afraid

of all the way from,

you know, starting from goals,

loud noises, walls,

you know, sickness,

being alone, partner leaving

them, taking care of parents,

and also a fear of losing a loved one.

Fear of dying before somebody.

The fear of somebody dying before them.

You, you know, fear of

not having enough money, fear of not

going to your full potential.

There's so much

fear that was in that post was like,

I think over 600 people

commented like

and within the first half hour or so.

So what I did was I was like, OK, great.

You know,

people are open and people are aware

what they're afraid of.

Let me go.

Check this on LinkedIn.

And guess what cricket?

Nobody did,

nobody left a single comment.

Exactly the same post,

but people are too afraid to even see

and admit what they're afraid and being,

you know,

afraid of being judged

on that professional platform.

And I understand,

I am not judging them,

but I'm just saying

this is what fear does.

Even though we want to say

something or participate,

we are just too conscious.

Today, I wanted to talk about fear

because I see it as number one thing

that stops people

from living their full potential

or living their life freely.

I saw that for myself, and when I

saw that and I was able to change myself,

it didn't.

I started to look back

and see what changed, right?

There were period I was in fear.

I was not making decisions.

I was not moving because I was afraid.

So I started to look back. What?

Changed and how it's changed,

so I could

possibly share it with people and maybe,

you know,

they can use the same things

and see if that helps them.

So I've been working on that

and I still work in progress,

but I thought I'll share

some of the

discoveries

I've made through my own journey.

I have to tell you that

this is not something new

you might have heard at

and another shape or form.

Fear has been talked

about since time and age.

You know sages

who had walked through this

Earth have talked about fear.

So we have books, scriptures,

all kind of

wisdom that available to us about fear.

But what I am going to share

is how I have applied

some of it with my life,

and hopefully it can be of use to you.

As I was diving into fear.

one of the things I was reminded of this

quote by Wayne Dyer, So Dr.

Wayne Dyer

said that when you are in fear,

there is no room for love.

And when you are in love,

there is no room for fear.

And I thought how beautifully describes

any relationship

and it applies to any relationship

when you

are afraid and fearful of your partner

leaving or somebody rejecting you.

You cannot have love when they are.

It just

goes right.

And equally,

when you are in love, we are so excited.

There's no fear you can go and talk

and do things that you

otherwise wouldn't do

because you're in that crazy love feeling

your adrenaline is running

and you are able to do

those things that you,

you know

when you sat down

and think you could not have done it,

you know,

think about

the times

when you propose your first partner or

first girl or boy, you know you did it

despite the

fear, and you must out,

you know, so many other things that

maybe when you look back

today would seem crazier than you think.

How did I do that?

What got into me to do that, right?

So that's what love allows

and or that's what fear stops us doing.

Let's look at what fear really is

in order for you to have a fear

you need to have two things.

One, it is directly in relation

with time. Right.

You are afraid or fearful

of something that will happen in time.

Right.

And it's that time is future.

It's always, always, always future.

Fear is always about the future.

Even if you are

afraid of something that might repeat

something that happened in

the past can happen again.

But it will happen in future.

It's not happening now.

Your fear is always about future.

And it has,

and because it's always about future.

It's always imagination, right,

because you cannot be in future

without imagining about it,

it's your projection of your future,

it's your thoughts,

what you believe could happen

in the future, right?

So it's always about time, it's

always about future.

And there's is usually

the second thing is

there's usually somebody or something

else in the world

that is bigger than you.

Right?

It is always about something

that is bigger than you.

It could be as a children,

it could be a parent.

It could be something unknown.

As grown up, bosses, some life situation,

but it's usually bigger than you

that you cannot

find a way to control in the moment.

So you're afraid of that thing.

So that's what fear is.

It's about time.

It's about something bigger

and it's about the future.

And it's really in the imagination.

It's your story

that you're building in your mind

based on your past,

if you understand that.

That, you know, it's a story,

it may or may not happen in future,

but it it's my imagination that,

as I said right now.

Then maybe it makes you easier to deal

with, right?

It gives you a little bit of

breathing space so that you know,

you can do something about it, right?

Think of it

all the people that

commented on my Facebook post

about all the fears that they have.

In a way,

they are aware of it

because they have lived

and relived that fear in their minds,

in their imagination over and over again.

But they are aware of

the fact that you are aware of something.

That means you are in

that you're

not in that situation already,

you're out of that situation.

Right.

So.

Here I am. Right.

Let's look at it.

Imagine this is fear,

and if I can see it from here

standing here,

I can see and see,

I am afraid of this, right?

That means there is already separation.

That means I'm already out of it.

Otherwise, I will know that this is fear.

You know, the fact that I can see it,

that means I'm already out of this fear.

I I can distance myself.

I have another distance to recognize it

and do something about it.

So that's

a first realization

when you realize that you are afraid

it's a win win situation because

your realization itself,

your awareness itself is

is an indication

that you're a separate

from that fear that that fear,

whatever it is, imagination

that might have an tomorrow or,

you know, the next moment, but it's still

separate and you have

.

You have time to do something about it.

When I realized this

had made such a big difference for me

because I knew I could do something

about whatever the fear is, whatever it

might happen tomorrow or day after

or in a month because I knew, given

the time

I can come up with some solution

to fix the thing, right?

So

so hopefully.

When you start your journey

and recognize your fear,

this will help you.

The other thing is fear,

because this is a learning experience.

You have learned it from

something in your life

or somebody else's life,

whether it's movie in your life,

when you've seen somebody,

something has given you that fear.

Usually a trained, programed

thing that stays in your memory

in your body.

You know that's what you call your mind.

That is in your mind.

That fear is in your mind.

Let me give

you an example.

As a child, you know, as a child,

whenever I did something wrong

or my day

where I was at risk

or putting myself at risk

and older, my parent or teacher would,

you know,

yell, scream, shout

to warn me

who would make me laugh and bright

because there was.

They were bigger than me,

so I was afraid of that.

The louder voice has made

clear that fear

and that somehow

stayed within my body doors.

Those instances where somebody shouted

because I did something wrong,

it made me numb and because it happened

more than once

and because it also had something in

my memory, I repeated that instead

because I was scared of it in my mind.

I read the story more than once.

A lot of times,

so to speak, it became part of my memory.

Now.

30 years later, the same

five year old child who is now.

35 years old, sitting in a meeting,

a boss or a customer

or somebody a higher authority.

Social says something in a, you know,

very serious tone of voice.

What do you think it does to me?

It immediately triggers the same program

that five year old child had

the same fear,

and all of sudden I become numb again.

You know?

And I don't have any answer,

I don't see anything.

I'm afraid

I couldn't,

you know, I noticed so many times myself,

I didn't know why I wouldn't talk

until I recognized

it was the same fear of that

five year old that was running in my body

that was afraid of the loud voices

from authoritative figures .

And that's why

I could never say things to these people.

But once I realized that

this is that fear,

once I gave that light and I say, Oh,

I continued,

You heard that five year old fear

and no longer five years.

I'm 35 years old.

Thank you, you

know, for protecting me at that time.

I think we can do without, you know.

And as I said that, I literally said

that I was able

to walk away from that fear.

It made me scared.

You know,

now somebody else,

it just makes me laugh or I have,

you know,

it does not trigger anything in my body

for me to become numb or resist

that fear or resist that love,

you know,

dialog

the action that you can take from

there is look at and, you know,

look at the things you are fearful about,

you know, make a list of things.

If you don't know what

you're fearful about,

absorb your thoughts.

Then you know, every day you write down

what you are thinking,

what how you're feeling, just write down

every hour that you know,

these are certain things I thought.

This is how I felt the last one hour.

Make a note of each week

a lot of your emotions

and see how fear shows up

in different areas

and different situations.

And as you note

the situation where you are

fearful challenge, ask the question

Where did I learn this fear from?

How did it come in my body?

And in fact,

as you start to recognize

that you're

being fearful

about something in that situation

to simply breathe in

and feel, feel the fear in your body,

sit with if feel where it is.

And just by doing that,

you are putting a spotlight on the fear

and it will fade away.

You will recognize its imagination

and it will fade away.

And if not, if there's something that is

has a lot stronger hold on you,

it will allow you to see deeper.

Sit with it.

Tell yourself

that you're allowed to be afraid.

Tell yourself that it's okay

to be fearful at this party.

Literally, say those words to yourself

and see what happens.

The fact that you order

that fear

the fact that you give it a light

attention

and you recognize

that there is something that caused that

fear,

it allows that fear to just fade away

so that you practice it.

NF Times, it will go away.

I am telling you, you will start to see

a lot more

freedom in your day, in your life

if you start doing these things

obviously was a mistake

that lived thousands of years ago,

he said.

Fear is the cheapest room

you have in your house.

I would love to see you

living in better conditions

and this is what Rumi said on fear.

On what fear is, it is non

acceptance of uncertainty.

Once you accept uncertainty.

It is all adventure.

Think of it, you know, when, when,

how you can

come to their acceptance

that tomorrow is uncertain,

tomorrow is unknown

and that we don't know everything

and we cannot control everything

just gives you a moment

and freedom that

the fact

that I cannot control

and do everything anyways.

You let it go.

You let go of

fear when you start to accept that

the only do

certain things in your life are

being born.

And that will die.

Everything else in between is a drama

that we don't know

and that will unfold as it is to unfold

from moment to moment.

If you're able to accept that,

you know, things will pick up later.

As I mentioned earlier,

the reason

I'm excited about talking about fear is

the power it gives.

When you're able

to get freedom from the fear

or do just things despite of

having the fear,

you know,

the fear less

does not mean absence of fear.

The fear

less people are those

who are able to take action

despite of the fear.

So I'm really excited

that I'm working on this.

I'm going to end this episode

with some of the wisdom that others

who have walked before us

have left us with.

I am just sharing it

because it made a difference to me

and hoping it will. So, you know.

If you knew who walked beside you.

At all times

on the past that you have chosen,

you could never experience fear

or doubt again.

Let me repeat.

If you knew who walked beside

you on the path that you have chosen,

you could never experience

fear and doubt again.

Dr. Indya.

Ahead in this episode of this point

that Ramdas shared was given to him

by his friend

Emmanuel.

And this is about fear.

What does the voice of fear

whisper to you?

Fear speaks to you in logic and reason.

It assumes the language of love itself.

Fear tells you it was to make you safe.

Love says you are safe.

Fear is give me symbols,

give me frozen images,

give me something I can rely on loving

Tutsis only give me this moment.

He will

fear, would walk

you down

the narrow path,

promising to take you

where you want to go.

Love says.

Open your arms and fly with me

every moment of your life.

You're offered an opportunity to choose

from love or fear, to tread the earth

or soul to the heavens.

Why would fear want to oppose the truth?

Why would fear want to oppose the truth?

Because

truth has power to transform the fear.

Fear

believes it's fighting for its life.

If you no longer allow fear

to step violently

before you and shout of Cataclysm,

it will create behind you

and see something reasonable.

It will creep behind you

that says something reasonable

in your year.

Beware of reasonable, rational thinking.

Reasonable supposition

doubt is rabbit's foot off the fear.

Ask your higher wisdom if it's not true

that without fear, you would have arrived

exactly where you are now.

And more pleasantly worry

and fear a lot,

the tickets on the big screen.

They are the extra baggage.

You're going that way anyway.

You are going that way anyways.

Thank you.

I hope this was.

I hope

this makes a difference in your life,

and you're able to take these principles,

these words of wisdom

and apply in your life

and it changes and transforms your life.

And if it does.

Please share this episode with others.

Also,

would you be kind enough to share with me

in the comments?

What are your takeaways or what

are you afraid?

How do you work with your fear?

Let me know how it is ruining your life

and interact with me less less.

Take home fear together.

All right.

I hope you enjoy the show

as much as I did

and got some valuable nuggets out of it.

If you liked it,

there are other shows you can watch.

They are exactly what you need,

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