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# 14 Resilience 101: The Superpower That Boosts Mental Mojo – Art of Life Podcast
Episode 145th October 2023 • Art of Life • Kanika
00:00:00 00:20:55

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In this podcast, we explore why resilience matters, unpacking its significance in our daily lives and mental well-being.

Join us as we uncover the secrets to building resilience, sharing thoughtful questions and insights that empower you to bounce back from adversity with renewed energy.  

Tune in and unlock the potential of your mental mojo through the art of resilience! 

 🌈 Bullet points + chapter markers 

[00:00] Intro 

[02:24] What Resilience Means? 

[05:20] Why is Resilience Important? 

[07:44] Are resilience and perseverance the same? 

[10:58] What separates a resilient person from a non-resilient person? 

[14:06] Can resilience be taught? Can resilience be learned? 

[16:38] Have Faith in Life That It's Working Out For You 

[19:30] Life Makeover Program to Build Resilience 

 

🌈 Episode Highlights 

  • Unlocking the Power of Resilience: In this episode, we embark on a journey to uncover the true essence of resilience. Discover how resilience can transform your life, helping you bounce back from adversity, and gain a deeper understanding of why it's a superpower you can cultivate. 
  • Resilience in Real Life: Tune in as we explore real-life stories of individuals who have harnessed the power of resilience. Learn from their experiences and find inspiration in their triumphs over life's challenges. These stories will leave you feeling motivated and empowered to enhance your resilience. 
  • The Art of Building Resilience: Dive into the world of art therapy meditation with our Life Makeover program. Explore how creativity and mindfulness can be used as tools to build resilience. We'll share practical tips and insights on how you can incorporate these techniques into your daily life for lasting positive change. 

🌈  Links from this episode 

🌟️ Register today for a full-on Life Makeover – a super easy, gentle and fun way to heal every aspect of your life with Art Therapy Meditations 

https://artoflifecenter.com/art 

🌟️ Subscribe to Art of Life podcast 

https://listen.artoflifecenter.com/listen/ 

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Transcripts

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Welcome to the Art of Life podcast.

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This is a podcast where we ponder over some questions, some mindsets,

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some beliefs to get better at life.

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Today we are going to talk about resilience and dive deeper into that.

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See what we can do to become more resilient, what sort

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of attitude we can have.

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Towards the end, I really want to leave you with really one big key takeaway.

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And hopefully, that's a driver and a motivator for you as

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you continue your journey.

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Cool.

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Let's get started.

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First things first, let's unpack what resilience means.

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Now to me, it's almost like the elastic band in our houses.

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We stretch them and then we stop stretching them and they

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take the shape back together.

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It's almost like bouncing back, bouncing back in life from whatever

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life throws at you, whatever's happened, bouncing back, the capability

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of being able to bounce back.

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There could be certain things around your life, maybe your phone's fallen down

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a couple of times, or your computer's taken a bad hit and still survived,

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maybe there are some resilient objects around you, maybe your car, there could

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be other people as well who you would think that they're very resilient,

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because no matter how life flows, maybe it goes really up and down, but

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they seem to travel through it okay.

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They don't seem to be weathered as much with what life's bringing to them.

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There are other people who can be really traumatized by events, and it's not to say

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an event is a big or small, no labeling like that, but some people can really take

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it to heart, whereas others can live life.

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Things will happen, they will still have generally the same attitude, the

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same positive attitude that keeps going through, and they're somehow able to

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bounce back through it, through all the hardships and difficult circumstances,

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and they're almost coming out at the other end, almost unscathed.

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That's resilience, and those are really resilient people.

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Now, why is resilience important?

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Of course it's important for the individual because it allows

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you to live life and like living life in terms of living life.

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Because life will go up and down, somebody will cut you off in traffic.

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There will be other hardships in life, like you might not

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get a job that you wanted.

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There will be other situations that are really out of your control as well.

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At the moment of recording this podcast, I have a family member going

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through some serious hospital stuff and I know my life's going to change.

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But resilience would be that ability to come back, to still be able

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to survive with the change, to be okay, and to enjoy my own life.

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By doing that, I also give permission to the people around

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me to enjoy their life as well.

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It's almost like a tree, right?

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The tree, yes, as such, it's standing in its place, but it's giving shade,

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maybe it's giving fruit as well.

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People come in, sit down, play around the tree, lie down in the sun.

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have some shade when the sun's very hot.

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But the tree is that figure which holds that space for them when life's hard.

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If I'm resilient, I give permission to people around me to relax and to be okay.

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If I looked at this in a work life sense, maybe there's some absenteeism

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in the team, the manager would really be more capable of handling that absence

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of managing that stress, if somebody took a long leave, suddenly they could

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be capable of handling that, managing the whole team dynamics while that

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is happening and engaging with other people at a better emotional level

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as well to allow them to be safe and to really be okay with the change.

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Let's say there was a legislation change that had some team impact, and then it's

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around setting the energy in the space and being okay with it that people around

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you feel comforted and feel okay as well.

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At home, with your family, it's again being able to cope with whatever life

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is throwing at you, that when you come home, you're providing a safe

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and a nurturing environment for your family, for your partner, for your

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kids, and all the other loved ones.

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Now sometimes there can be a confusion between resilience and perseverance.

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Are resilience and perseverance the same?

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Resilience is around bouncing back in life.

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Something happens.

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Maybe it's a death, maybe it's an illness, maybe there's a hardship, like

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job gets taken away, or COVID that we've all experienced in some shape or form.

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Resilience would be being able to take that and not letting it

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affect you internally as much.

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It sort of happens, happens around you.

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You feel it, you work through it, you're able to talk to it, do

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the things that you have to do, but doesn't impact you as much.

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That's resilience.

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Perseverance is probably a small part of it, which is

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trying to go on no matter what.

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You would persevere for a goal that you really wanted to achieve.

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Let's say you wanted to climb a mountaintop, you will train and

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train and you will get there.

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But perseverance can be up and down in terms of emotions, you might really

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feel great sometimes, you might not feel motivated sometimes, but you

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still keep going, that's perseverance.

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Resilience is a little bit different.

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Resilience is that emotional stability.

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And it's not to say it's all the time, it's 100%, a person who's resilient

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is going to be resilient 100 percent of the times, no, we all have our ups

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and downs, but resilience would be being able to take all of that and

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still being generally buoyant with it.

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Still being at a place where your family, your friends, your

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work, the life goes on as usual.

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It's not impacted for them.

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You can still perform things as you generally do.

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Yes, you probably will have some breaks here and there, but largely you can carry

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on no matter how life is going for you.

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Things around you, the processes, the people, they're all okay.

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They don't have to worry about you.

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And you, by yourself, also feel okay.

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That no matter what happens, whatever change is happening, you're still

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okay, and you're like, that's alright.

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What separates a resilient person from a non resilient person?

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Like, what's the distinguishing factor?

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And in my mind, there's this concept around life.

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Now, I'll ask you this question.

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Are you living life or are you managing life?

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It's a deep question.

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Think about it again.

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The resilient people, I believe, they are living life.

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Life will automatically have its ups and downs.

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That's how life is supposed to be.

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That's how life is designed to be.

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But oftentimes, we can get caught up in trying to control it.

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Let me give you examples.

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Let's say my child comes back.

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He's got low grades.

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And I go like, mm mm, I've got to fix it.

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And I try and think of what I need to do that I fix them.

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The classes that he will go to or blah, blah, blah.

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And yes, there's a part of me as a parent that's supposed to do that.

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But there's also other part of the whole equation, which is the child and then the

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child's ownership in wanting to improve.

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Living life would be to live life, as in to do the steps that you're

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supposed to do, but allowing the other person a freedom, free will, to choose

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what they want to have in their life.

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Let's talk through another example.

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Let's say you have a partner and he or she is not eating properly

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and you're genuinely concerned.

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You want to control them.

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You want to tell them this is what you eat in the morning or

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have you eaten this much, right?

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Now again, question comes back to are you living life or are you managing life?

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You see, if you start managing life, then you're trying to control it.

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And to some extent, you can't control it.

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Another person, whether that's your partner, whether that's in a

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work environment, any colleague, they will do what they wish to do.

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That's outside your zone of control.

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The only person you can control is yourself.

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It's not in a limiting way, it is more understanding that,

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all right, that's what happens.

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It's more doing your duty, doing your part, doing what you're supposed to do,

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but establishing a boundary for yourself more than for anybody else that, okay,

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I won't cross this line because this is where somebody else's boundary begins.

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Let me look at another example, another way of explaining this.

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Think of the balcony and dance floor.

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I've talked about this a couple of times previously as well,

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but it really helps explain it.

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In your life, where are you at?

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Are you in the balcony?

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Or are you in the dance floor?

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Dance floor is where life's really happening, where you see all the people

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around you, somebody's running around throwing newspapers in the morning.

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Somebody is rushing to school.

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Somebody is getting late to work.

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Someone is cooking.

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All of that chaos in the morning is happening in the dance floor.

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When you step up in the balcony, then you can start seeing how the newspaper

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is affecting the person who wanted to get up and read the newspaper in

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the morning, maybe, or how someone's breakfast is impacting something else.

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In the balcony, you get a whole big picture of what's really happening.

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In your own life, things that are happening right now.

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They can be very big in the moment.

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It's almost like you are in the dance floor of your life.

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It seems to be all coming at you.

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And if there's a change, like in my example, there's a little change going

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on in the family and I am nervous as well about it, but as nervous as I am, if I

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step back into the balcony and watch that this is happening and then start thinking

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around, okay, what is the bigger lesson?

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What do I have to do?

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How will life evolve?

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How will life shift?

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The moment I step in the balcony, then I am not worried or

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tangled in the emotions as much.

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My decisions that I take, they will be much more neutral.

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They'll be a lot more rational.

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And needless to say, it will be a whole lot easier for everybody

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around me because I'm not panicking and I'm not nervous at that time.

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Can resilience be taught?

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Can resilience be learned?

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And I'll leave that to you to answer.

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Because we can all evolve in life as we want to.

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It's our life, we will pick up things that we like.

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We will pick up things that, for whatever reason, they're not good

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for us and we still want to do them.

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That's our birthright as individuals, as human beings on this planet.

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We all have a right to live and learn as we want to.

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But for yourself, I want you to think whether you are living your life

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or whether you are managing life.

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Are you managing it for yourself?

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Like how will your day go today?

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Are you super nervous, anxious around it?

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Like am I trying to, for example, control the outcome?

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I guess I'm better off to some extent doing my job and then letting life be.

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We try and control life, but in reality, even though I'm trying to

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control it too much, there's many things that are outside my control.

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It's a lot easier to do my part and then be okay with life and have a faith

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in life that it's going to be okay.

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That life's always working out for me.

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If I have that faith, and that's what I find a lot of the resilient people

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really believe that life is working out for them, there is that undeniable

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faith, that undeniable understanding, belief, that life is working out for them.

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And that's why they stay resilient.

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Now, hindsight, if you look at your life and look at some of the really

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difficult circumstances, maybe you lost a loved one, maybe there was something

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terrible that happened and you thought you would never survive this, I urge

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you to go back to that time and not exactly that time, but after that

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time and see the growth that happened.

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There's a lot of growth that happens from pain.

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A lot of the times we think about the pain, of course we don't want the

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pain, but there's also growth, there's learning that happens from the pain.

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Yes, sometimes you might feel that what's life.

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is doing is giving you shit right now.

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And that could be absolutely correct.

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But think about how much stronger, how much more capable, how much more

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evolved as a human being you will be once you've learned your life lesson.

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How much will you become more resilient, more sure of yourself because of

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the hardships you're going through?

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The other aspect of course is, even if you don't believe that life

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is working out for you, I'd still encourage you to believe that anyway.

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Believe that there is a higher power.

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Believe that there's a universe that's actually standing there

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supporting you, cheering for you, wanting the best for you.

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Because you came on Earth wanting to have all of these life experiences.

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When you were a soul, you picked up this body, you also picked up largely

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the experiences you were going to have, because these were some of

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the tasters that you wanted to do.

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These were some of the life experiences that you really wanted to experience.

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Now you could ask yourself, why, why did you pick this one?

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We go sometimes to a Japanese restaurant, sometimes to a Chinese

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one sometimes to a Mexican one.

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We might not always like the food that we tried, but there's that experience.

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There's the learning.

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There's awareness after trying a particular cuisine

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that, Oh, I didn't like that.

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It's similar thing with life as well.

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Sometimes the downs help you appreciate the ups.

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And that is what life's about.

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I hope the question around living life and managing life resonates with you.

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Do let me know what you think about it.

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And maybe the next time when there is a graceful moment happening in life,

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like how it is happening in my life, I'd encourage you to think around

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living life versus managing life.

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I'm going to do the same.

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Now, if you're wanting to build resilience, my life makeover

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program is It's an absolutely fun way of building resilience.

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The whole aspect of being in the balcony versus the dance floor, that's literally

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what the entire program is about.

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Being in balcony is more about being neutral, being able to

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observe things and really learning to operate from your intuition.

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Life Makeover program teaches you that with art therapy meditation.

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In every class, you sit down, you play with some colors, and have fun while

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improving the energy of some space.

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For example, in one class you might play with the energy of time.

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Now last time I did a class on time, there was a gentleman who'd come...

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He complained about his work being really, really busy.

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And after we did the class, he came back and said, Oh, you wouldn't believe it.

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My whole team has taken leave for one reason or the other and I have

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got a week of almost nothing to do for no reason at all because it

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wasn't even like the holiday season.

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It wasn't school holidays.

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It wasn't anything particular.

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But yet he had his whole calendar free.

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That's when we play with energy of time, there are times where we

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play with manifesting, where we heal our past traumas, where we

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connect more with our intuition.

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It's really designed to help you with every single aspect in your life,

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whether that's personal, whether that's professional, whether that's spiritual.

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And the beauty of it is because it's all really art therapy meditation based,

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you're playing with colors and you're having fun while you are really changing

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and shifting the energy around you.

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Whether you want to manifest relationships or you wanted to get really great jobs

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that give you a whole lot of money, have a business that has hundreds

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of clients or thousands, I believe really strongly that the life makeover

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program can provide that to you.

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And if not, well, there is 100 percent money back offer.

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You will start noticing a shift with every single art therapy session that you take.

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Every session is an hour, it's an hour of play.

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And with that, you experience a shift in your life.

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That's it for the Art of Life podcast for today.

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If you have enjoyed listening to the show, please do reach out to me, respond

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how you felt about the question around living life versus managing life.

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If you have a little bit more time, also leave a review, share the podcast

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with your friends, because that's how the podcast gets known to more

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people and that's how this message can go to more people in the world.

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Thank you for doing your part.

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Thank you for listening, and I will connect with you next week.

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See ya, have a lovely day.

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