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You Have To Fix This Right Now!
Episode 5222nd June 2022 • The Daily Podcast with Jonathan Doyle • Jonathan Doyle
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In a culture that has elevated victimhood to a fine art many people have learned to find a reason for their failures or poor performance. So many people simply blame circumstances or others for whatever they fail to achieve. However, a small number of people have learned that no matter what the external circumstances may be they take a radical responsibility for their lives and the effort and energy they bring to every worthwhile goal.

If you want to build a new level of success in your life then the first thing to fix is this; you need to take total responsibility for your internal standards and remove all blame from external conditions.

Grab a free copy of my book Bridging the Gap here:

https://go.jonathandoyle.co/btg-pdf

Enquire about booking Jonathan to speak:

https://go.jonathandoyle.co/jd-speak-opt-in


Find the Youtube version here:

https://youtu.be/Nlt_PV_FYzk


Find out about coaching with Jonathan here:

https://go.jonathandoyle.co/coaching

Transcripts

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Well, Hey everybody, Jonathan Doyle with you.

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Once again.

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Welcome my friends to the daily podcast.

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I've gone back to a dedicated podcast edition.

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I was doing a single video addition and splitting out the audio.

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But, uh, you know, what.

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Oh, I've got this weird kind of fascination with high quality microphones.

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Everybody's got their weirdness, this one's mine.

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And, uh, I'm using this beautiful Shure SM seven B microphone

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because I felt for the podcast.

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Sometimes the audio is a little bit off.

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Cause if you watching stuff on YouTube and video, People find that much easier.

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But I wanted to give you guys the regular podcast listeners.

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Some, uh, some good audio content as you go about your day and

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some good audio quality today.

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Look the housekeeping as always, if you're a new listener or are you checking

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regularly, but haven't subscribed.

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Please subscribe to the podcast does make a big difference.

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And also in the show notes, there'll be a bunch of other stuff.

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I want you to grab free access to my book, bridging the gap.

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You can do that.

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There'll be a link here in the show notes to grab a free access pass to

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my original book, bridging the gap.

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You can go do that.

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And if you want to book me to speak.

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Find out about other things, jump across to the YouTube channel.

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All the links will be here in the show notes.

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Okay.

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It is early in the morning.

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I've been up since about 3 58 M best time of day.

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Outside the studio it's foggy.

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It's cold.

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It's dark.

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It's miserable.

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And I'm in this warm studio.

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We've had a really cold start to the year.

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It had to the winter.

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It's a, I think it's going to be one of the coldest we've had in

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a very long time, took Karen and the kids up to the, to the snow.

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Just, I think it was last week, which was really a bit of fun.

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We don't see a lot of snow around here, so it was good to get up there

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and experience that as a family.

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But my friends, it is Blake.

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It is cold outside, but it is warm here today in the studio.

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As we discuss today's topic, we're going to talk a little

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bit about setting internal.

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Standards.

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As many of, you know, have you been listening in regularly?

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I've been coaching a sporting team have been coaching.

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My daughter's a division two soccer team, and it's been a

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really interesting journey.

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I've learned a great deal.

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They're a fantastic group of young women.

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It's been a real pleasure to do it.

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But I've learned a lot in the process.

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And one of the things I noticed in yesterday's training session, And

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I spoke to the team about this.

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So I'm not sort of betraying their confidence in any way.

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The issue of internal standards now.

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A lot of times we allow our external environment, other people.

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Circumstances our energy levels to set our internal standards.

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So we had.

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A whole bunch of people training last night and you can truly see the variants.

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In the level of execution in the training drills.

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So I think we had about 14 players there last night and you see this diverse.

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Set of performances.

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And the drills were requiring a certain level of execution, but it's quite

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extraordinary to watch that you will have person X who just internally

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brings a high level of performance, and then you're going to have another

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player who's just not bringing it.

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I think if I had one great fascination over these many years in the area of

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personal development, it would be that it would be that mysterious X factor.

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That conditions.

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What we bring in life.

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It's just, you can have two people coming from the same background,

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the same difficulties in life.

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One person.

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Really struggles to, to grow and develop and develop their potential.

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Another person just absolutely knocks it out of the park.

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I saw an interview the other day with, uh, Ben Carson.

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Who have spoken about in previous years, Ben Carson ran for us

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president, I think back in maybe 2016.

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He was a really extraordinary guy.

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He grew up in the housing projects of Detroit super poor.

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Uh, no father in the home.

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Uh, he really struggled with learning difficulties.

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He had to kind of teach himself to read.

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He would go and sit in public libraries.

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Long story short, he becomes a phenomenal world, famous brain surgeon.

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He said he was the first person to separate.

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Uh, Siamese twins joined at the brain.

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And then of course went on to run for president.

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So this is a guy who's had an, you know, you could actually see his love story.

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I think it's called.

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It's something hands.

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Think it's healing hands.

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The movie there's a movie about his life is really worth watching.

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Very moving.

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So you see this person coming from the most extremely difficult

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background, who yet makes something remarkable of themselves.

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So, this is what fascinates me, this sort of.

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Why do people come from?

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You know, I mean, You know, I don't want to be unkind, but there's this

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some public figures these days who've come from a lot of money, but yet act

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quite reprehensible in certain ways.

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I'm thinking of two in particular.

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I won't name.

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Because it would sound awfully judgmental, be done at anybody's full journey.

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We don't know exactly what triggers what they do, but.

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Isn't it true that there's plenty of people that come from a lot

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of affluence and success, but yet managed to blow their lives up.

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And there's people that come from.

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Great.

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Poverty and difficulty and yet managed to make something themselves.

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And then there's everything in between.

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You'll get people from poverty who go on to have really awful

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lives and do terrible things.

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And people from affluence who build on the foundation they've been given.

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So look, I think the only thing we can conclude is that all of us

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have this sort of radical freedom.

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To decide what we actually want to achieve and contribute in life.

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And the purpose of today's message is really the link it back to

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this idea of internal standards.

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You really, they can't be forced on you.

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I said to the, to the girls last night, I said, if you will not

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bring your own internal standard.

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Then the way that the universe is constructed is that.

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Someone else is going to enforce a standard on you.

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You see.

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You let's just say you don't have the standard of obeying laws or

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doing the right thing will then eventually if it goes far enough,

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The police and the legal system are going to enforce a standard on you.

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Okay.

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So you can see that if we don't eventually bring some level

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of internal standards, then.

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The world around us is going to enforce all sorts of external standards and

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probably many of them that we want, like.

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So, what are you doing?

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This is the great question.

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This is the thing that keeps me awake at night.

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How do we do it?

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I think this just, you have to show up for yourself.

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You have to kind of go.

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I don't care.

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What the weather is doing, what the economy's doing,

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what the government's doing.

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What my spouse or kids are doing, I'm going to set my own internal standard.

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And rather than being a burden, I think it's actually leads

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to a kind of freedom, right?

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It leads to a kind of sense of no matter how difficult things are in

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life, you control the internal standard.

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You need to define it.

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You need to know what you stand for.

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What's significant to you.

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And again, on that.

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That may sound abstract when I say at first, but we all carry around within us.

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This hierarchy of values.

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Somebody came to me yesterday with a complex decision.

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They were trying to make.

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And they made the comment about Dar.

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They said, oh, look, I'm really, you know, I really indecisive

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and I struggled with this and.

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And I worked through this decision process with them and I helped them to

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see, they had a hierarchy of values.

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That's where the clash was.

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That's where the tension was.

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There were two or three things that they valued that were

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playing out in this decision.

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I said, you have to really work out what your hierarchy of values is.

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What's the most important thing.

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So we bring this back to the idea of standards.

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We have to work out.

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What are the most important things in our life?

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Is it.

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Is it success?

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Is it hard work?

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Is it loyalty to family?

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Is it, uh, I'll always try and bring excellence.

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We have to be conscious of these specific things that matter to us, the things

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that we say are significant in our lives.

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Because I really am noticing a culture and a lot of people who are just drifting.

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And not really taking responsibility for what they bring in the world.

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And I really, as I say, many times we have a culture that

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massively empowers that sickness.

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I think it is a kind of.

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Mental spiritual sickness.

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We have a culture that empowers victim hood.

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We have a culture that empowers, uh, just sort of expecting that

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the government's going to bail you out and give you whatever you want.

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And, you know, just yesterday it was, it's funny here in Australia.

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Uh, two state governments have got together and I think they've just come

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up with something like a $9 billion.

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Pre preschool program.

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It's something way.

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You know, they're going to pump $9 billion into, uh, you know,

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Some sort of new fancy, they're going to build some new childcare

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facilities and do blah, blah, blah.

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And I looked at it because you know, of course.

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A lot of the way my background's in macroeconomics, I'm looking at it going.

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$9 billion.

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You know, the economies.

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Train wreck and.

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And, you know, the Australian population is aging and our productivity is

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falling and our GDP is stagnant.

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And yet we're funding these kinds of projects.

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To the tune of $9 billion of money that doesn't exist.

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So if you're listening to this guy and we'll talk is a really good thing, I go.

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But what's interesting to notice about it is, um, you know, somebody in the

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comments on this article said, well, but you have to realize that our high school

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we're scores and our university stuff is getting worse and worse and worse.

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So we're throwing more and more money at the front end, but we're still getting

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the same results on the back end.

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But my, my point in sharing this story of these, this is that.

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You know, honestly, You may think I'm a little cynical, but I don't think

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it's really about, because some people in government had this passionate

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concern for preschool education.

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I think it's just a vote by.

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I think it's basically just, you know, let's just.

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You know, throw $9 billion.

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Right.

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And there's elections coming up for one of these state

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governments, $9 billion, right.

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And what I'm getting at is that it leads to a sense of entitlement.

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It may leads to a sense of the government's responsible

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for providing all this stuff.

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And just trust me on this.

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Having interviewed some of the best economists in the world

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on another show that I do.

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It's a really strong phenomenon.

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This moment in history, this vast money printing where sort of government

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just runs program after program.

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And we all kind of get hooked on it.

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We all kind of get expect that, uh, you know, things are just going to

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turn out exactly the way we want and someone's always gonna rescue us, but

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someone's not always going to rescue us.

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What we actually want is not to be dependent.

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We want to be independent.

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We want to have these strong internal standards about what we are going to

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develop, grow and contribute in the world.

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Sorry.

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That was a tangent.

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I'm passionate about it.

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I think we need to.

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Stop looking for external forces to rescue us.

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And just start to bring our own energy effort and talent.

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And passion and creativity to the world.

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I just, it bugs me.

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I just think it's a, it's a victim based culture where expectation of.

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Being rescued is not particularly good for development now.

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The last thing I'll give you here is a great quote from Ray Kroc.

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Ray crock of course, was the founder of McDonald's.

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It's a China restaurants.

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You may have heard of it.

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Ray Kroc says the quality of a leader is reflected in the

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standards they set for themselves.

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Could you imagine if our political leaders had, you know, Really high internal

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standards, really high internal standards.

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And, you know, As you know, I read a great deal on the founding

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fathers of the United States.

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And, and you look at their focus on the civic virtue, personal virtue.

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You know, coming back to the government example, you know, George Washington

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famously said that no generation should incur debts, that it cannot

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discharge in its own lifetime.

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No generation should incur debts that it cannot par.

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Discharge payoff in its own lifetime.

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Can you imagine what that would do for our sort of political system and economy.

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If you know you couldn't print money and.

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You know, fund everything with debt.

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If you couldn't pay it off in your own lifetime.

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And what I'm getting at again, is that back at that, in that

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founding era, there was this sense of great personal responsibility.

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Yes.

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There was a strong religious element to it, but for, for many

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of them, they were humanists and they kind of weren't necessarily

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coming at it from a spiritual lens.

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It was just this deep idea that humans.

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Should have very strong internal standards.

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And if people, if enough people had strong internal standards,

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we'd get a certain kind of culture.

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So friends, that's all I really wanted to say today.

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I know there's a lot in that as always, but I'm passionate about this.

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I'm passionate about.

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How we set internal standards.

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No one can do it for us.

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We just have to make this firm decision, not a resolution.

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I was reading some great stuff yesterday.

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Resolutions.

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You know, a very much open to whatever's happening in the environment around us.

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You know, we can make a resolution, but if things change, we'll let it go.

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Whereas decisions from the Latin

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It means to cut off from, to burn the ships, to, to, to break down the bridges.

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So you can't go backwards and to go forward.

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If we have these internal standards, we build a different kind of culture.

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So.

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Practically as you go through your day next 24 hours, 48 hours.

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Start looking at your internal standards, starting noticing.

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When your energy's down and you're kind of like, ah, I can just eat this or I can

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just do that or say this, or it doesn't matter if I do a lousy job on this.

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Can I give you one last story?

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Would that be okay?

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I did tell the girls in soccer a few weeks ago, quick story.

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Uh, years ago, I was, uh, trying to buy Karen and engagement ring.

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We've been married 20, almost 22 years now.

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And I was working about six jobs.

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I was an undergrad at university of college, and I ended up getting

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this job as what we call a dish pig.

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I used to scrub all the dishes in a commercial kitchen and do all the

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cleaning and, uh, you know, one night.

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I would die.

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Everyone would leave and then they'd sort of close up, but I'd be one

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of the last people there doing all the final cleaning, mopping,

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all the floors and all that stuff.

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And it was me and the security guard and, uh, one night I'm.

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Uh, mopping and I lean right down and a mopping this floor.

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And as I look across.

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I see under this big commercial dishwasher, is this spoon right?

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Up underneath this dishwasher right at the back on the floor.

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And I could tell her to been there for like, you know, since prehistoric times

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this thing was glowing, it was that dirty.

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And I remember this profound moment where I had this strong sense.

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I thought, well, no one knows that I've seen that.

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And who cares if it stays there?

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And then I had this real moment of clarity and I said, Jonathan to myself, I said,

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you'll know that you didn't do it, that you didn't make the effort to pick it up.

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So I got down on my stomach on this wet floor.

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And I sort of crawled under this commercial dishwasher and literally

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scraped this spoon out with my fingers and, um, and washed it.

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And I sort of held it up in the air and I was like, LA.

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I was like this sword from the stone Excalibur moment.

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But it was a real reminder to me that.

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Um, it's what we do with, we don't have an audience that really matters.

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Right.

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And this is what we do when we don't have an audience that really matters.

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So, if you want to move your life forward, if you want to improve your outcomes.

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Heck of a lot of it's got to do with internal standards.

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All right.

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That's it for me today, please make sure you subscribed.

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Go check out the links in the show notes.

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If you want me to speak at a conference and advent work with your business.

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Uh reach out to me and make sure you grab that free access to the book bridging

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the gap that's in the show notes i'd love you to share this with some people if

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you like what you're hearing just stuff like this long a few friends and say hey

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you might like this all right everybody god bless you my name's jonathan doyle

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this has been the daily podcast and i'll have another message for you tomorrow

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