Identifying and Overcoming Common Charisma Killers in Your Presentations

Summary

In this episode, presentation coach John discusses why some presentations fail to connect despite clear, confident, and sometimes even humorous delivery. He introduces three common 'charisma killers'—overexplaining, incongruent energy, and lack of curiosity.

John shares real client stories to illustrate these points and offers practical advice on how to rectify them. Additionally, he previews a live event called 'Charisma Killers,' where he will go over seven major charisma killers and techniques to address them. This event is scheduled to be free and will take place monthly on LinkedIn and YouTube.

Register for your place on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/events/thecharismakillers-what-ssilent7357846227289276416/theater/

Chapters

00:00 Introduction: Why Your Presentation Didn't Land

00:28 Charisma Killers Overview

01:16 Charisma Killer #1: Overexplaining

04:10 Charisma Killer #2: Incongruent Energy

06:14 Charisma Killer #3: Lack of Curiosity

08:10 Recap and Upcoming Live Event

10:03 Conclusion and Call to Action

Visit presentinfluence.com/quiz to take the Speaker Radiance Quiz and discover your Charisma Quotient.

For speaking enquiries or to connect with me, you can email [email protected] or find me on LinkedIn

You can find all our clips, episodes and more on the Present Influence YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@PresentInfluence

Thanks for listening, and please give the show a 5* review if you enjoyed it.

Mentioned in this episode:

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I've got a question for you.

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Have you ever delivered a talk or

a presentation, and even if you

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thought everything had gone well,

it just didn't land, or at least not

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the way you thought it was going to,

you didn't get the results that you

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thought you would get, you might have

been clear, maybe really confident.

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You may even have been

funny, but something was off.

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So what have I told you that it might

not be your content or your delivery,

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but a hidden charisma killer that

you didn't even know was there.

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In this episode, I'm going to share with

you three charisma killers that I see

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all the time working with clients, plus

stories of real people with their names

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changed, of course, who overcame them?

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So let's dive in.

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My name's John.

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I'm a keynote and presentation coach,

and this episode is something of a warmup

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for a special that I've got coming up.

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It's called Charisma Killers.

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It will be a live event on LinkedIn

and YouTube, and I'll give you more

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information about that a bit later on.

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But on that training, I will

be revealing the seven biggest

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charisma killers that sabotage your

stage presence, your influence,

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and even your long-term bookings.

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So today I want to give you a

taste by walking through three of

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the most common charisma killers.

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They are overexplaining or

over teaching incongruent

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energy and a lack of curiosity.

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So let's start with one that I see almost

constantly from speakers, especially

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with a training or teaching a background.

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Let me introduce you to Tina, and

that's not her real name, but she is

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a real client who came to me because

her keynotes weren't landing and Tina

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was and is from a training background.

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Highly experienced and

incredibly knowledgeable.

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Great at what she does, but when she

got on the stage to deliver a keynote,

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she couldn't switch off the teacher.

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She'd walk her audience through every

concept, explain every angle, and

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overfill the talk with content or

value as she was referring to it as.

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The result, her audience was

overwhelmed with information,

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maybe even confused, but certainly

somewhat disengaged because of it.

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And she ended up being frustrated

because she knew that her content

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was good and the impact was there,

the transformation was there.

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But here's the thing, training and

keynote speaking are not the same game.

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They are different beasts.

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Training is more about clarity and depth.

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You have the opportunity to go

deeper and share more, teach more

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keynotes, have more of a reliance

on energy, emotion, connection,

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and inspiration to take action.

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So she was bringing the right skills into

the wrong moment, and she's not alone.

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Another speaker I worked with not

that long ago, we call her Kay.

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She also came from a teaching background,

and what she was finding was that she

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wasn't really getting rebooked and

her workshops weren't really landing.

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So once we worked together to

switch off teach mode and switch

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on connection mode, things started

to change and pretty fast as well.

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In fact, within weeks of us having started

working together, she was reporting back.

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The feedback she was getting from events

was much better, especially when she

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went back to an event where she was

rebooked to speak, she was told by the

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event manager that the transformation in

her content and delivery was exceptional

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and was definitely a big improvement.

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So overteaching is a charisma killer,

and if your audience feels like

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they're just being overloaded or

force fed information and content,

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it will ultimately shut them down.

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It's too much for their brains to take

in, in the scope of a keynote talk.

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They don't really feel seen, they don't

feel connected, they don't feel a need

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for more information if you've delivered.

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Everything already in the keynote,

even if they forget most of it,

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the moment they walk out the

door, it's deadly for charisma.

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So let's talk about incongruent energy

and let me tell you about Anthony.

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And Anthony was a passionate speaker.

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Still is.

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He masked his nerves by going full

motivational speaker mode, and he

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was not a motivational speaker.

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Now, it's always good to bring a bit

of that motivational speaker energy

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where you can for certain parts of

the talk, the high energy, the big

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smiles, the enthusiastic delivery

was great, but none of it was real.

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It wasn't authentic to him.

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The more he tried to pump up his

energy, the more disconnected his

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audiences felt and the more disconnected

he felt from what he was doing.

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So he looked the part, he maybe even

sounded it to some degree, but something

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wasn't quite clicking, and audiences

can always feel that if there is an

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incongruence there, if how you are

trying to be perceived doesn't really

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match up with the general energy

or demeanor, people will notice it,

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even if they can't quite explain how.

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That's incongruent energy.

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We've probably all encountered

that at some point.

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We've either seen it in others or we've

experienced it for ourselves as well.

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So it's when your outer delivery doesn't

match your inner emotional state.

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Or the emotional tone of your message,

so you can see it in people smiling

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whilst they're delivering serious

news or overly animated delivery

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for a subtle or intimate message.

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Fake confidence, masking

fear or insecurity.

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It creates cognitive dissonance.

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And audiences might not know why,

but they will feel that something's

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off and they'll start to disconnect.

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And once Anthony learned how to ground

his energy, match his delivery to the

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moment and the content, And Show up with

more of an authentic emotional presence.

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He became magnetic.

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Authenticity is charisma and

congruence is how you deliver it.

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Now the third charisma killer is one I've

experienced myself, especially from my

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time in storytelling and standup comedy.

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Way back when I used to think charisma

was all about impressing people, looking

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sharp, being witty, getting the laughs.

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But here's what I learned.

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Unfortunately, the hard way, but hard

lessons are ones that last for sure.

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Charisma isn't about being interesting,

it's about being interested.

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So in standup, the best

comedians listen to the room.

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They're tuned in.

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Curious, responsive.

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And I'm not talking about engaging

with hecklers, although that can be

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a part of it, but I'm really talking

about noticing energy shifting, maybe

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changing a delivery just based on the

energy of the room that you are in.

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When I shifted from more of a look

at me to let me really connect

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with you, everything changed.

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Energy shifted for me and

audiences leaned in more.

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I'll say this as well, it made me a

little less scared of going up on stage

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because I wasn't there so much for me

or for what I was going to get outta

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the experience I was more interested

in delivering something good to my

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audience and connecting with them.

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And when the focus is on things that

aren't based on how good you are or

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what you can deliver, or the accolades

that you might get afterwards, if

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you do a great job, things shift.

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Whether you're speaking on stage or in a

podcast or one-on-one, curiosity connects.

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Conversation particularly, you know,

if you want to connect with people

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who might be giving you referrals or

additional bookings, having genuine

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curiosity in people enables you to deepen

connections and have people feel that

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you really cared and really heard them.

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When you genuinely want to understand your

audience, when you adapt to them in the

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moment, they will feel it, and that's what

charisma looks like from the inside out.

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So let's quickly recap the three

Charisma Killers to look out for here

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over explaining or over teaching, which

is turning your keynote into more of

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a training session and trying to pack

everything in to 45 to 60 minutes or

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however long you're doing, sometimes

delivering super long keynotes just to

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try and fit everything in unnecessarily.

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Most keynotes probably shouldn't be

much over 45 to 60 minutes unless you

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are actually being asked to deliver

something that is longer than that.

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Incongruent energy, saying one thing

and looking or feeling or showing

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something a little different.

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Picking up a, um, having people's

emotional radar picking up and

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something isn't quite right, and that

lack of curiosity, focusing on your

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performance instead of connection.

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So these are just three of the seven

charisma killers that I'll be sharing

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and working with you to fix in my

upcoming live session, Charisma

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Killers, How to Spot and Stop What's

Sabotaging Your Stage Presence.

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So.

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It's gonna be free, it's gonna

be occurring monthly as well.

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So if you can't get on the one on

the 14th of August, there will be

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monthly repetitions of the event

for you to be able to come back.

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Or you can maybe try and find

the recording on either my

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LinkedIn profile or on YouTube.

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So in that session, which will

be around 45 minutes, I'm gonna

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show you how to identify which

charisma killers are affecting you.

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And what to do to fix them.

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It's gonna be free.

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It will be live.

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You'll be able to ask

questions at the end as well.

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And it's packed with practical insight.

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You'll find in the YouTube

description or show notes you feel

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on the audio podcast, a link for

you to register for the event now.

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And if you are listening after the

14th of August, well just make sure

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you're following me on YouTube or

LinkedIn and you will get notified

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the next time the event is running.

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Now if you want to increase your

bookings, re bookings, referrals,

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or just feel more magnetic when you

speak, you won't want to miss this.

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And hey, if any of these charisma

killers hit home for you, I

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would love to hear about it.

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So drop a comment or message me

directly and I'll look forward

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to seeing you at the live event.