Life often never goes as we planned. Many of us had dreams as kids of what we wanted to be when we grew up. Most of us change those many times before we become adults. No one’s life goes according to their first initial plan.
Why is this? Because we all make adjustments as we grow. We learn about ourselves and we mature in our values. Adjusting to life is part of living life well. We adjust to things like jobs and relationships. Having confidence doesn’t mean we get everything right. It means we have an attitude of adjustment.
On today’s show, we talk through 3 key ways to ensure adjusting is part of building a confident life.
Pick a Direction
- You can’t adjust your direction if you have no direction.
- Why are you here? What does a great life look like in a normal week?
- A lot of guys never answer that question.
- Survival mode is the path of least resistance.
- You can only behave beyond your current standard when you look beyond your current reality.
- Picking a direction is part of living a confident life
- When you don’t pick a direction, you’ll wander from fad to fad.
- Not choosing is a choice. When you don’t pick your direction it is picked for you (listening to music, watching streaming vs TV channels)
- When we don’t pick, we are giving control of our lives to others
- Key Idea: Choices aren’t permanent- they’re tests for feedback
Set Up Boundaries
- Gardens flourish within the right conditions, grass looks lush and green when taken care of
- Too often we don’t work on the boundaries of our lives so we can’t flourish
- Boundaries Focus our Work and Energy
- Boundaries Make Decisions Easier
- It is deciding before you have to make the decision.
- Boundaries Protect Us, even from ourselves
- The simplicity of the concept of boundaries doesn’t mean they are easy
Make Micro Adjustments
- Making adjustments is a good part of living our lives
- Flights adjust constantly as they travel to get to their destination
- We do the same thing as we figure out what works in our life
- We prototype things and then drop it or adjust it
- Don’t always adjust everything- have a planning, executing, and evaluating rhythm.
- These are all micro adjustments and they are a part of life
- You won’t be perfect and shouldn’t expect to be, but if you don’t try you won’t know
CHALLENGE
- Quit waiting for Perfection to pick a direction
- What are the core 4 to 5 things you value most in life?
- What doesn’t a lifestyle that supports those things look like on an average day?
- What does the schedule look like in an average week?
- Where do you live and who are you with?
- Boundaries
- What boundaries do you need to start living that way today?
- Read Boundaries by Henry Cloud & John Townsend
- Go to www.boundaries.me
- Embrace adjustments and look for ways to improve
- Make a plan/prototype.
- Set a start and end date.
- At the end date ask yourself:
- What worked well?
- What made it difficult?
- What did I learn about myself in the process?
- How can I adjust to fit the future I desire? (could even mean stopping something)
- Understand that change isn’t always better
- You don’t have to constantly be changing everything
- Sometimes maintaining what you’re doing is best.
- Be wise in your adjustments. Be selective. Only work on 1-3 areas at a time. NO MORE THAN 3. Preferably 2 or less.
- Sometimes the best adjustment is to stick to the original plan and focus on it
Watch and Enjoy!
David & Reese Maxwell
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