S for Single Parent Dating
Hi everyone! Welcome to the A to Z of Sex. I’m Dr Lori Beth Bisbey and I am your host. We are working our way through the erotic alphabet one letter at a time. Just a reminder this podcast deals with adult content, so if you don’t have total privacy, you might want to put on your headphones. Today the letter is S and s is for Single Parent Dating
Joining me today to talk about the latest science in single dating is Dr Duana (DWAYna) Welch. She is the original Love Factually author and coach, known for using social science to solve real-life relationship issues. She has been a professor at universities in Florida, California, and Texas across 20 years, and she has contributed to NPR, PBS, Psychology Today, and numerous other outlets, podcasts and videos. Her first book, Love Factually: 10 Proven Steps from I Wish to I Do, is now out globally in five languages. Love Factually for Single Parents [& Those Dating Them] is the second book in the series, specifically geared for finding the right partner not only for readers, but their families. Her book series Love Factually Singles (February, 2019) provides science-based dating advice in single-topic titles that fit readers’ desire to save time and money and to read content specific to their needs. All her books rely on science rather than opinion to help men and women find and keep the right partner; and they all have a blue cover, for easy identification. Her Love Factually client practice is global, via Skype and other technologies. For more information and free content, see LoveFactually.co.
We talked about single dating and how to find the person who is committed to you and who is the love of your life. Dr Welch was clear that even people children can have an adult relationship. She talked about the research that shows that most children do not recover well from multiple upheavals but those where parents remarry once – recover much better. She spoke about taking time in the introduction and being clear about your boundaries. Dr Welch’s book has a step by step guide to dating as a single parent including protecting yourself and your child. She recommends trusting your intuition and suggests combining reading her book with reading Gavin De Becker’s book The Gift of Fear.
We spoke about how longitudinal research (research over a long period of time) highlights that recovery from divorce is variable and that those who do recover move on with their lives and relationships in an adult manner. Dr Welch spoke about how important it is to observe a potential partner’s behaviour with others in the environment and how important it is to make sure that the person is kind, of good character and treats others well. She spoke about only dating when the children are not with you – either when the other parent has them or when you arrange baby sitters or child minding. She spoke about the importance of not talking about your children and your family all the time and that keeping the details of family life out of the conversation allows you time to assess this person’s commitment and desire to be a step parent. She highlighted that this is a slow process and encouraged people to find out as much as they can about the person via the internet, friends, family and even their ex partner. We agreed that people who are not willing to have adult conversations as to why relationships ended and what the challenges of previous relationships were.
Dr Welch talked about the series of books she is launching Love Factually Single Series that deal with one issue per book. The first book coming out on Valentine’s Day is on online dating and profile creation.
You can find Dr Welch at LoveFactually.co.
Thanks for joining me for the A to Z of Sex this week.
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