Join Allison and Joe DuBois as they explore the profound theme of signs from the other side during this special Thanksgiving episode of The Dead Life. With the holidays approaching, they emphasize the importance of remembering loved ones who have passed and recognizing their presence, especially at family gatherings. The couple engages with heartfelt listener calls, sharing touching stories that demonstrate how spirits communicate and offer comfort to those left behind. They discuss the emotional complexities surrounding loss, the significance of being present for loved ones in their final moments, and the power of familial connections. Tune in for a blend of warmth, wisdom, and a reminder that love transcends even death, creating memories that last a lifetime.

Welcome to the Dead Life.

Here's world renowned medium Allison Dubois.

Today on the Dead Life, Joe's joining me in studio to hear from you, my listeners and your call in questions.

With it being the week of Thanksgiving, it seems like the perfect time to talk about Signs from the other side.

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Well, Joe, welcome back.

Why, thanks for having me.

It's been a little while.

Well, we've had all these, all these crime cases look at.

So it's been, you know, it.

Where did the year go?

Where did October go?

Where did November go?

It's just been, it's been, it's been crazy.

Lot of content, Lot of content.

Lots and lots of content.

So I'm excited that we're doing an episode on Signs.

It's been a while since we've done that and I think especially at this time of year with the holidays, it makes us miss the people that we've lost.

And so I think this is a good reminder that they're never really gone and to keep the faith that they're still there with you, especially on Thanksgiving in America.

Pull up a seat.

They love to be recognized on special holiday occasions.

They love a seat at the table, especially when there's good food involved.

So, you know, that's such great advice.

And we do it, we'll have a seat at the table.

But you, you can, you can feel it that they're, they're there.

Like they come you, you, if you include them in your life, they'll be there.

You know, every year, you know, I think about my dad and you think about your dad and we picture them at the table and look at our daughters that we see inflections of our dads and which, you know, I just love that about family.

I know that Thanksgiving and Christmas and Hanukkah can be a time where people feel, especially this year, like there might be some friction at the holiday dining table.

Right.

But try to put everything aside at the end of the day, it comes down to family.

And some of those Older family members may not be there next year.

So don't sit this Thanksgiving or Christmas or Hanukkah out.

And don't, you know, not show up because, you know, you're irritated by the election or things maybe not going your way or just not wanting to have a debate about anything.

Right.

And I think people are feeling.

You've said it many times.

Next year is going to be a big.

Well, this year is a year change, but next year, too, and I'm not quite sure, maybe you can explain why theirs are different, but people feel it and they get antsy, and so they're ready for the change.

But your family will be there.

There will be some young ones that also pass away next year that will come out of left field, that won't be expected.

So, you know, we never really know when our time is going to be, how short it might be.

And I think this is a good reminder that, you know, love and family and making memories, creating versions of our heaven supersedes anything else that could be bothering us and just put it aside.

Watch National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation.

We have a list of Christmas movies we're ready to watch.

I think there's.

I.

What is there 20 on there?

Christmas Story, the Holiday, the Grinch Elf.

Yeah, A lot of our faves.

And I also like some of the funnier ones, too, that we'll be sure to put on that people don't always think about Die Hard.

Okay.

Yeah.

That is a Christmas movie.

People debate that, but we're positive it is.

So why don't we start by hearing our first call in?

All right.

Hey, Allison.

Hi, Joe.

It is Nina Kidd from Duluth, Minnesota, again.

And I just wanted to tell you about this really cool thing that just happened.

I was walking along the lake, and I was listening to the dead life, and I was listening about asking your past loved ones to send you specific things.

And I never met my biological dad in life while he was alive.

And I really don't know too much about him, and I've never really known what to ask for a sign or whatever from him.

So as I'm listening, I'm thinking and thinking, you know, and I'm like, you know what, dad?

Send me an otter.

But in my head, why not?

Yes.

I kept picturing a seal And I'm like, no, not a seal.

And otter.

An otter, you know?

But my.

My mind's eye kept picturing a seal.

Well, I get done walking, and I'm putting my.

My stuff in my minivan, and lo and behold, on the ground next to the driver's side door is a little pamphlet with just a little bit out of it.

And wouldn't you know, it has on a harp seal, and a baby seal is called a pup.

Now, that is just the coolest.

Pardon my language.

That is the coolest motherfucking thing ever.

Like, he sent me a seal.

He knew he wanted to send me a seal.

I thought otter, but he telepathically sent me seal in my head.

And then bam, not more than a half an hour later.

Would you look at that?

I love it.

I really needed this message today because it has been just an awful past couple of days, as I'm sure you know, And I just wanted to spread this little bit of love and happiness, because this made me so happy.

I just.

Yes.

Allison, thank you so much for telling us what to look for, what to ask for, and to pay attention in your mind's eye.

This is great.

I love you guys.

I think this podcast is the shit.

Awesome, awesome, awesome.

You guys have a great day.

I love her zeal.

I know.

Thanks, Nina.

That was okay.

Does Nina not sound like a radio host from the 80s?

Didn't she totally have the vibe of, like, the MTV host?

And I was, in my mind, Joe's always laughing at me because I'm such a visual being.

Oh, you say so many things.

When she was asking for a seal, I was picturing the artist's seal sort of on his side, going, there's a seal.

That's the seal.

Yeah, the seal.

The seal.

So I love this story, and I think it's a good reminder not to challenge.

Don't challenge the other side.

But if you throw something out there that's doable for them, you're going to get a sign back, and they can read your mind, so there's no, like, tripping them up or.

You know, she must have had a pretty good connection, because she was saying otter, but she was seeing seal.

So she, like, she knew, but they.

And at least she was, you know.

Good enough to figure it out.

They have telepathy.

They're telepathy.

Telepathic beings.

So her dad knew, and he gave her exactly what she needed.

And I love that, and I hope on Thanksgiving this week that many of you ask for a little sign from a loved one.

That's passed.

And remember, they always say we're the dead ones.

They're more alive than we are.

So don't think, oh, I hope they have enough energy to do this for me.

They have more energy than we do.

They laugh at us.

They're like, please.

Yeah.

So let's go ahead and go on to the second Colin.

All right.

Hi, Allison, this is El from New York.

We have spoken one on one before and you have played a question of mine on an earlier episode around the passing of one of my parents.

My question today is how can I be of the most helpful?

My other parent is now in their final stage of life.

Within the last year, they suffered a health crisis and were moved from their own home to a nursing home that they are paying for themselves.

The US Adult children are estranged, with the majority of the children and their spouses controlling the questionable narrative decisions and care around this parent.

And the parent allows it because they are in a weakened state.

The parent who passed years ago would not have allowed this to happen.

The minority in the situation is me.

Unfortunately.

A month ago, I had to remove myself from all contact with this parent so that both they and I could have a measure of peace.

The actual message I received from spirit was that I needed to make this sacrifice so that my parent could have enough peace in and around their life now in order to be able to let go later and so my life could also move forward.

I cried at the thought of it all.

Since making this change, I spend a few minutes daily meditating on this parent.

In the meditation, I tell them how much I love them, how happy I am to see them, and that I am right here in this space if they need me or need to call on me.

At minimum, the meditation helps my heart and my hope is that my parent feels my love for them.

When my other parent passed, I knew they were surrounded by grace and loved ones.

I also knew they were more receptive.

I am concerned about this parent, their situation, and their receptivity at the time of their passing.

My question for you is, is it possible and appropriate for me to offer to be there for this parent energetically at the time of their passing, to be a part of the light that helps in their transition if they need the extra help at that time?

Have you ever experienced anyone on the other side say to you, you know, it would have been nice if I had a little extra help from my loved ones, living or in spirit at the time of my passing?

I would love and appreciate your insight on all of this if you have any to share.

Thanks, Allison.

You know, it's interesting, as far as time of passing goes, I've never brought through anyone that said it would have been nice if they'd been there, because when we're transitioning out of this world, the last thing we're worried about is what's going on around us, because we're more focused on dying, I was gonna say, and letting go.

So I know that in the physical world, we would think from our point of view, how we are impacted by not wanting to be alone or hoping that my son comes to see me one last time.

And they will hang on.

Their soul will hang on waiting for people.

I mean, that does happen.

But I love how healthy that this caller was as far as recognizing that you can come to terms and peace with the soul of the person who's passing or even someone who's already passed, and heal those wounds that you have and be a part of the process mindfully and spiritually, rather than physically being there.

She's absolutely right.

I do.

I'm a big proponent of planning how you want it to be around the time you die and writing it down ahead of time, like, years ahead of time, not letting your kids decide for you.

And this is the reason, people.

This is the reason.

We love our children, and we always hope that they would do the right thing.

However, when we're losing somebody that we love, often people can become selfish, making things the way they want them to because they have control over that.

And I can't control mom or dad dying, but I can control this, damn it.

And we.

We dig our heels in and make it about us instead of about what they would want.

Now, obviously, the more evolved people will still make it about what the dying wants rather than what they think they need.

There's a big distinction there.

And conflict amongst siblings is very common, which is why I don't believe it's rarely in the best interest of a family to make one of the children an executor, because it gives them the control over the other siblings, and it makes the other siblings feel helpless and as though that child was more trusted and loved.

And it creates a power dynamic that isn't always healthy or that isn't easy to heal.

Like, that is a hard one to go through.

Right?

So I am a big fan of having a lawyer, somebody that's an impartial third party, be the executor.

And it also forces you to be very clear on what your wishes are.

Like with a kid, you might just say, well, divided up Equality.

That's not enough for a lawyer.

Like, they need to know this.

You know, A, B and C.

That's what I want.

And I just did a reading where the sibling brother was made the executor and then changed some of the rules after the fact as to percentages and what he gets to be paid for dispensing the money, dispersing the money out to the other siblings.

And greed can play.

And sometimes when it comes to wealth and power.

Absolutely.

Yeah.

I think it's more pragmatic to write out what you want ahead of time and make sure that an impartial third party's carrying out and executing your desires with your will and your passing.

Also, this is where death doulas can come in.

They negotiate the emotional climate around the person who's dying because they're practically a stranger who's trained to be there and make sure that whatever the wishes of the dying are, are carried out, whether that and that it doesn't become about who gets to be around mom or dad at that time and who doesn't or, you know, the tone of the room being made into something that resembles like a World War 3 scenario while somebody's trying to let go peace.

So death doulas come in and bring the calm into the environment.

And if they have to kick someone out, they're going to tell them they need to leave.

It's in the best interest of the dying because they're upsetting them, if that was the case.

So I know it's hard for regular people who haven't dealt with this to believe, but there is a lot of conflict in death around somebody passing and the will, especially in testament of the money and properties and such.

But being able to have control over who gets to see or hold mom's hand is not something that should be in the children's hands.

It creates rifts and bad blood between siblings.

And I think that's a mistake.

And I felt that there's this caller L.

There's other things going on.

There's subtexts that we don't necessarily know about.

But yeah, that's not right that she can't see her.

And she kept saying her parents.

She didn't say her mom or her dad or her mom and her mom or whoever it might be.

So I wasn't sure why she didn't identify which parent it was.

I think she maybe doesn't want to be identified.

Just keep it.

Yeah.

By people who know her.

If they listen to this wildly popular podcast that they would know that it.

So, okay, that it's her.

And she removed herself from contact with the parent that's passing.

And it sounds like contact from the siblings as well.

Well, that's why.

I mean, it seems like that's why.

And she did it with the best.

With the right.

For the right reasons.

Not, you know, she doesn't want to have extra stress around, you know, around the family during the passing.

There's already enough stress.

Right.

And then she's vowed to be there for that person when they pass and.

Reconnect, even if it's just energetically.

I don't know if physically she's going to be there or not, but she's going to energetically be a part of the process.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

But then she was worried that.

Does the parent.

Does anybody ever say, why weren't you there when I passed?

And I've never heard that question.

And I'm kind of.

Actually, I have parents say the opposite.

They'll come through and say, I understand why you couldn't be there.

So don't carry guilt about that.

I knew you loved me.

I carried it in my heart and I took it with me.

Don't beat yourself up for not being able to be there more or not being able to be there at the time of my passing.

Honestly, it makes it easier for them to let go if everybody says their goodbyes and is loving on them, and then everybody leaves the room and allows them a moment to just adjust to the process of letting go.

Right, right.

And then when they are on the other side, they know your heart, they know your emotions so well, they can.

Feel you while they're dying.

And while they're passing, they're that connected to us.

So the other side's really good at adjusting the energy of the person who's dying to make them acclimate to the other side.

So they're already becoming more of a telepathic being and more empathetic.

And they hear your thoughts, they feel what you feel, they understand your pain, they recognize your frustration or your stress related to their passing, and they really just don't want us to carry that.

So anyone out there that's carrying guilt over a past, a past passing of someone you love, that you couldn't be there as much as you wanted to, or you were too young to realize how important it was at the time and didn't spend as much time with them as you would now, they understand that.

They understand that youth is a reason that many make mistakes in those moments.

And to them, it's no big thing.

They're like, don't worry about it.

I know that you love me.

You were a child or you were young or you were busy or you were giving birth.

I mean, there's all sorts of scenarios.

Bottom line, don't beat yourself up if you couldn't be there at the moment of passing.

They're not the ones that are afraid.

We're afraid to let them go.

And I have had every now and then, there will be someone that was afraid to die at the time they were passing.

But once they start the process, you see their face relax and you see them recognize people around them and that they're not alone, and the fear is gone.

So for those people who were afraid to pass, once the transition starts, the fear goes away.

I hope that helps.

Oh, that will help.

All right, let's hear from Suzanne from New York.

Hi, Allison and Joe.

My name is Suzanne.

I'm from New York.

Allison, thank you for answering my last question a few months ago.

Greatly appreciate it.

My question for today is my husband had a kidney removed due to cancer after the surgery.

Was told that his cancer metastasized and is aggressive.

Fortunately, he lost a lot of weight after this surgery.

Anyway, he took a bad fall prior to the surgery.

So I set up multiple cameras in my home.

So one morning while I was working, I worked very early.

I just checked in on him, and I noticed by the bed, his clock.

When I looked at the clock, the numbers were changing very fast, like, just moving.

The numbers were just moving very, very, very quickly.

So I turned the camera over to my clock on my side of the bed, and it was doing the same thing.

The first thing that popped into my mind was spirit someone there.

And I just assumed that it was his mom because she did cross over.

She knows.

I'm very sure she knows that her son is very ill.

My question is I know that spirit can do things with electricity and that.

And I'm just wondering, am I making too much of this?

I have a feeling that she is going to help him transition.

This is not the first time things have been happening in my house where I hear footsteps and I just know someone in my room.

Can you help me with this?

I don't know if I'm just thinking too much of much of this, but I guess I'm just sensing I'm preparing myself for him to transition.

I greatly appreciate it.

Thank you for all that you do.

I listen to your podcast very often and have a great day.

You and Joe, thank you very much.

Bye.

Well, it's Definitely not in Suzanne's head.

No.

The numbers on the clock rapidly changing on multiple clocks.

Yeah, that's his mom letting you know.

That'S pretty good, actually.

Yes.

I would read that as her saying, his time is limited or his time is up and that's why the clocks.

And so she had that happen.

Yes.

And that's her way of conveying to Suzanne that, don't worry, I'll have him.

I'll be here for him.

So when you let go of his hand, his hand falls into mine.

Don't worry.

So I see this as soothing.

The mother in law trying to soothe Suzanne and reassure her that she's there for her baby.

With the husband passing, I feel terrible for you, Suzanne, that you're going through such a hard personal loss.

Yeah, that's one of the harder ways to go.

Well, your romantic love, you know, that's very special.

So she said there's footsteps and other signs around the house as well, going on.

Those are all the people that love him, that are just there waiting for him, pacing the floor, waiting for him to recognize that it's time to let go.

So I would find that incredibly reassuring if I was Suzanne, which my sense is that she does.

I just feel for her going through this because I think going through watching somebody die and that process of dying to be.

And you'd have to speak to this because we lost our dads very differently.

Mine was very quick and out of left field and yours was a slow passing, but watching them sort of deteriorate.

You get to say goodbye and have those moments with your dad, for instance, that I didn't have with my dad, although I knew he was going to die ahead of time.

So I did have that.

You're a unique case.

Well, sure.

So.

But for you, do you think it made it harder or easier having moments to hold his hand or talk to him?

I don't know if there's any easy way.

You certainly start the grieving process easier when you go through a long illness, I would imagine.

Earlier you start your grieving process and.

You'D like to say that you have less regrets, but at the same time, you always.

I still think, oh, maybe I could have gone and visited more.

But you can't.

You were in college, honey.

Your dad understood.

But yes.

So, yeah, I don't think there's any good way to go through the grief.

But I think that when I think it's faster if there was a long illness because you started the grief earlier, I think that's true.

You have more of an acceptance.

I think the level of trauma at the end that you have for quick passing because it's like a gut punch, like a punch to the soul.

Like you feel shredded because most people aren't prepared for those fast passing.

Except people like, I guess that know ahead of time.

Right.

I'm not the only one.

There's some others out there.

But even then it's a, oh, I hope I'm wrong.

But for you, I feel like if you're grieving over a long period of time, that trauma's been spread out over time.

And so I don't find it that it's any less traumatic for you.

I just find that it gets spread out.

Yeah.

Instead of all hitting at once as it does for a quick passing that's out of left field and that would probably be the difference.

And then you're force fed the pain all at once when it's a fast passing.

Right.

And a bit more denial at first because you know, the day before, the disbelief.

The disbelief, yeah.

Absolutely.

Yeah.

Wow.

So thank you for calling in, Suzanne.

Thank you.

I think all three of these questions.

Al, Suzanne and our first caller, I think they were all.

Oh, Nina, of course, of course.

I think they were all the perfect listeners to have called in for a week like today.

They were the perfect questions from the perfect energy.

And we appreciate all three of you ladies for sharing your lives with us.

And Jo, thank you for being my sounding board here today.

Of course.

The three, two young women and a mother of one of the daughters who disappeared and see what impressions I get on this particular case.

I'm not familiar with it, so it is one that I can do a write up on.

So I'm making sure I stay disconnected and in the dark as I do my write up.

And then I'll obviously have to write down what they do know after the fact so I can present it to the audience.

And thank you to my listeners for tuning in.

Tune in next week for a fresh episode of the Dead Life.

Happy Thanksgiving to my Dead Life listeners.

Gobble till you wobble.

I'm Alison Dubois.

This is the Dead Life.

And to all of my believers out there, don't stop believing.

Join us next week on the deadlight.

And don't forget to subscribe now to get notified of every new episode.