Dreams

Cecilia Knight

i’m three months postpartum

and i’m dreaming again

not the kind you get when you’re asleep

what is sleep anyway?

the kind you get when you’re awake

when your eyes are open

and you feel alive

the kind of dreams that remind you

of your fire

i say hello to them

and they feel like a long lost friend

that you meet up with in an empty parking lot

at 5am to watch the sunrise

and talk about what life will be like

when you finally leave this town

they feel like october

they feel like the bonfire

i can hear the wood cracking

i can smell the hay bale im sitting on

the beanie im wearing

makes my forehead itchy

but my best friend is sitting next to me

and just offered me his jacket

so i forget about it for a while

they feel like im standing in the front row

at my favorite singer’s concert

jumping up and down

screaming the words to

every

single

song

they feel like no one can touch me

they feel like my son will never go wanting

they feel like something worth hunting

and nothing can stop me

n o t h i n g