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No Shame In Pivoting
Episode 18 • 6th September 2024 • No Shame In The Home Game • Joyful Support Movement
00:00:00 00:14:52

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We're shaking things up a bit, but don't worry - it's all in the spirit of growth and flexibility!

What's New?

  • We're pivoting! 🔄 Our content is evolving, but our mission remains the same: to help you create a home that feels good, not just looks good.
  • Season 3 is coming soon! 🎉 We'll be featuring a mix of participant check-ins and Q&As. Can't wait to share more of your stories!
  • We're sticking to our every-other-week schedule to keep things manageable and fun for everyone.

Highlights from Our Chat

  • Sara's exciting update: Her son will soon be responsible for cooking one meal a week!
  • Lacey shares a heartwarming story about her son's age-based milestones. Kids are so funny!
  • We discuss the importance of using our voices in medical situations. Lacey opens up about her experience with gestational diabetes and advocating for her mental health.
  • Sara shares a beautiful "joy ripple" story involving two friends and a much-needed massage. Spreading kindness is what it's all about!

Get Involved!

Got questions for us? We'd love to hear them! Here's how you can reach out:

Thank you for sticking with us on this journey. We're so excited about what's to come and can't wait to keep sharing and growing with you all. Remember, there's always something to be thankful for, even when life throws you a curveball (or a s*** sandwich, as we like to say).

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Transcripts

Lacey:

Welcome to No Shame, the home game, the podcast that cares

Lacey:

how your home feels, not looks.

Lacey:

I am Lacey.

Lacey:

You're but not here, but here.

Lacey:

Co host.

Lacey:

Which hopefully will make more sense in a moment with Sara,

Lacey:

who is here, our co host.

Lacey:

Hi Sara.

Sara:

Hi, Lacey.

Sara:

It is so wonderful to see you.

Sara:

We spend a lot of time together, and then when we have gaps where we're not

Sara:

around one another, it's noticeable.

Sara:

So to be back together, I'm like, Oh yeah, this feels good.

Lacey:

is noticeable, and it's noticeable and I'm like, why am I so sad?

Lacey:

And then every once in a while I'll be like, oh yeah, I haven't

Lacey:

talked to Sara in a couple days.

Lacey:

That's probably why.

Lacey:

And we haven't been talking because, unless, you don't know,

Lacey:

I am unexpectedly pregnant.

Lacey:

And it has.

Lacey:

Turn my world upside down in the greatest way possible.

Lacey:

It's a whole thing.

Lacey:

I, you can listen to a sharing the middle episode of where I talk about it.

Lacey:

And IUD failure.

Lacey:

and.

Lacey:

You can imagine chronically ill Lacey is not so great.

Lacey:

Pregnant chronically ill Lacey is a wild ride.

Lacey:

but we're getting there.

Lacey:

we're making it happen.

Lacey:

We're very excited because it feels like the universe is giving me a pass

Lacey:

on not feeling guilty for having the third kid that Joe and I both wanted.

Lacey:

but it does mean I, I gotta make some assessments in life and figure things out.

Lacey:

So this is a little bit of an update episode to let you all

Lacey:

know where we're at, what's happening and what you can expect.

Sara:

I've said it multiple times on this podcast, and I say it all the

Sara:

time in my day to day life, is one of the biggest things I've learned

Sara:

through motherhood is pivoting.

Sara:

And to me, this is another, okay, yep, we got to pivot on some

Sara:

things here and that's what we do.

Sara:

you just say, okay, that's not going to work anymore.

Sara:

What are we going to do instead?

Sara:

And so I see the accommodations we're making is just.

Sara:

We've been practicing pivoting for plenty of years now, and

Sara:

we're gonna roll with it.

Sara:

And I know our audience is gonna roll with it, too, because sometimes

Sara:

it's fun to try new things on.

Sara:

And so this is all just, we're adapting, and we're also playing

Sara:

with,

Lacey:

that's what, as you were talking, I was like, we're also using it as an

Lacey:

opportunity to play around and try some new things out, which you know, I love.

Sara:

and okay, I can't hold it

Sara:

anymore.

Sara:

Okay.

Sara:

so we're gonna try telling our audience.

Sara:

We're gonna try a Q& A format, which I am actually Super excited about a couple

Sara:

of reasons and don't get me wrong.

Sara:

I loved our journeys with our participants.

Sara:

Absolutely loved it.

Sara:

But due to our new situation with Lacey's pregnancy, we need to be more flexible.

Sara:

So following a contestant for three months is super exciting.

Sara:

It's a little bit more challenging, but I love the format of a Q and a

Sara:

because one ever since I was a little girl, we used to get the newspaper

Sara:

every day and I'm not joking you.

Sara:

I would always read like the deer, so and so why can't I think of the names?

Sara:

It's

Lacey:

Abby,

Sara:

Dear Abby, I was like, I kept thinking Ann Landers and

Sara:

I'm like, that's not right.

Sara:

Dear Abby, when I was little, I used to read them all the time.

Sara:

And I just was fascinated by them.

Sara:

And one of my favorite podcasts right now is called We're Here to Help.

Sara:

And people call in with, honestly, bizarre situations.

Sara:

Ours are gonna, our Q& A's, we're still no shame in the home game.

Sara:

Our questions are still gonna be bound by the parameters of home management, I

Sara:

like this and I like that it's going to give people an opportunity to ask

Sara:

questions anonymously because we get it.

Sara:

It's personal.

Sara:

Sometimes you just really don't want to admit a frustration that you're having.

Sara:

And so I think we'll get to cover a lot of different topics that might

Sara:

resonate with a lot of different people.

Sara:

So honestly, I'm excited to pivot.

Lacey:

we aren't totally giving up on participants, though.

Lacey:

We have one participant that we had already been working with, so we're

Lacey:

going to keep that flowing along, and we're going to add in, guest experts.

Lacey:

I'm going to keep it, a little bit more secretive, because

Lacey:

we haven't totally figured out the logistics for that one yet.

Lacey:

so there, we are going to have a story to tell as well.

Lacey:

One that I'm really excited about because it's a little different

Lacey:

than what we've done this far.

Lacey:

And we also are going to check in with all of our previous participants.

Lacey:

We're going to see What life is like post No Shame in the Home Game.

Lacey:

How are their systems working?

Lacey:

What have they learned?

Lacey:

What have they changed?

Lacey:

because as we've said, pivoting is a big part of it.

Lacey:

And what worked then may not work now.

Lacey:

And I want to know all about it.

Lacey:

Yeah,

Sara:

I'll give you a little teaser preview.

Sara:

Participant Teresa, we're friends in real life, and she's doing great.

Sara:

she gives me updates and she's so excited.

Sara:

And she'll be like, look what I did.

Sara:

she loves sharing the progress because it's bringing her so

Sara:

much joy and ease in her life.

Sara:

So I am really excited for her to come on and share all the goodness, but

Sara:

I'm excited to catch up with everyone.

Sara:

the last time we talked participant, Alex was pregnant

Sara:

and was about to have her baby.

Sara:

So I'm curious how that all unfolded.

Sara:

we're just a reality TV, no reality podcast.

Sara:

over here,

Sara:

right?

Lacey:

I mean, there can be more Joe because, whoo, are we pivoting?

Sara:

I didn't want to put the spotlight on you, but I thought, wow, however much

Sara:

you want to share about this that we could do and share with the audience.

Sara:

that's a real follow along

Sara:

people.

Lacey:

well, I mean, you and I were just talking about okay, we have a new house.

Lacey:

We have enough bedrooms for everybody, but that's not how we set our house up.

Lacey:

So where's the new baby going to go?

Lacey:

So we've got, A lot of home management happening there.

Lacey:

Isaac started school and is going part time.

Lacey:

And so he's home.

Lacey:

I'm managing gestational diabetes and there's, yeah, there's a lot of home

Lacey:

management flexing in our household too, but some that we have built upon

Lacey:

previous things that, that we started, I know, I've already told Sara about

Lacey:

our trash collection, routine, we've incorporated a chore into Isaac's day,

Lacey:

and these are all things that I've learned from No Shame in the Home Game.

Sara:

Love it.

Sara:

Love it.

Sara:

I'll be able to do a little update.

Sara:

I've been telling my son for years when he turns 12 that he is

Sara:

responsible for one meal one night a

Lacey:

Ooooo.

Sara:

That will be happening shortly.

Lacey:

I love that it's attached to an age because Isaac also has things

Lacey:

attached in his mind to an age.

Lacey:

This is just something that he's done.

Lacey:

he didn't want to put away his own clothes until he was five.

Lacey:

And literally, the morning of his fifth birthday, he went and

Lacey:

he started putting clothes away.

Lacey:

Because he's Guess I got to do this now.

Lacey:

has also decided he's not going to buckle himself in until he's six or seven, which

Lacey:

I'm like, I don't know about that, dude.

Lacey:

I think you can do that now, but I'm too tired to fight you on that one.

Lacey:

So

Sara:

I love it.

Sara:

We still have so much good content to explore.

Sara:

It just might be in a slightly different format.

Sara:

yeah, we're just going to roll.

Sara:

We're going to roll with it.

Sara:

Cause that's all we can do.

Lacey:

that's all we can do.

Lacey:

So we will be starting season three.

Lacey:

I don't know the official date.

Lacey:

We have, one more to record, but we haven't because, again,

Lacey:

Lacey's, been on the struggle bus.

Lacey:

But we're in, we're moving in a positive direction.

Lacey:

I'm really hopeful today.

Lacey:

And then we'll start season three officially whenever we start,

Lacey:

you'll know, we'll tell you.

Lacey:

And it's going to be a combination of a participant, check ins and some Q and A's.

Lacey:

And I'm so excited for it.

Lacey:

We're going to keep it at every other week because every other week feels manageable.

Lacey:

and yeah, I'm excited for all of the possibilities.

Sara:

I am too.

Sara:

And if anyone listening is Oh, I've got a question.

Sara:

I know I want to ask.

Sara:

Go ahead.

Sara:

Head on over to no shame in the home game.

Lacey:

NoShameInTheHomeGame.

Lacey:

com.

Sara:

And you can submit a question there.

Sara:

honestly, you can hit us up on social media and ask a question there.

Sara:

We'll take it.

Sara:

However you want to deliver it to us.

Sara:

Postcard

Lacey:

Ooh!

Sara:

pigeon would be awesome.

Lacey:

I just remembered we have one from Carolyn.

Lacey:

So maybe I'll see if Carolyn wants to submit a little

Lacey:

voice note talking about it.

Sara:

and we also had a great, so we started our joyful support village in beta

Sara:

testing and we had a great question in there that we're going to maybe see if we

Sara:

can bring to share with the world as well.

Sara:

Because again, everyone is dealing with something, everyone, no matter

Sara:

your age, no matter your status with marriage, single family, who

Sara:

you're living with, everyone's got stuff that they're dealing with.

Sara:

let's all talk about it, man.

Lacey:

Yeah, man.

Sara:

can we do, I know this isn't a typical episode, but

Sara:

can we do what we're thankful

Lacey:

Yes, I was thinking the same thing, Sara.

Sara:

Yes.

Lacey:

Do you want to

Sara:

Do you want to you can go first.

Lacey:

Ah, I know.

Lacey:

I have a lot that I am thankful for this morning in particular.

Lacey:

I think we'll just say I am thankful for me using my voice.

Lacey:

That is not something that I have always done.

Lacey:

and with this being my third pregnancy, and it's very

Lacey:

convoluted, but I have diabetes and.

Lacey:

Technically, type 2 diabetes, I've got, I have gestational diabetes,

Lacey:

we'll just, cause I'm pregnant and I have diabetes, we'll just say that.

Lacey:

And it is one of the most mentally challenging things that I have ever been

Lacey:

through because of expectations, because of how you're, you monitor yourself,

Lacey:

and I read an article where like the, cause I was having such a hard time.

Lacey:

And the title was from a participant who was in this study said it feels

Lacey:

like medically, I don't know if it's medically condoned or medically

Lacey:

encouraged disordered eating because of how restrictive and how watched you are.

Lacey:

But I, this is my third time around.

Lacey:

This is not my first rodeo.

Lacey:

I know this about myself and I know that This is the longest I'm going to

Lacey:

be going through it, as well, because each time it gets earlier and now we're

Lacey:

just starting off pregnancy with it.

Lacey:

And I told my doctor, I'm like, look, I cannot handle all of this.

Lacey:

My mental health and wellness needs to be a part of this.

Lacey:

conversation, and I was actually heard.

Lacey:

And we have a plan for me to be able to manage it in a way that hopefully

Lacey:

allows some flexibility and the reality is that some of it's my own mindset

Lacey:

of if, Of needing to feel like I have some space in things not being perfect

Lacey:

and not being 100 percent right.

Lacey:

and some of that is how they treat me in this process.

Lacey:

So to hear her hear me and understand me and be like, yeah, we're going to

Lacey:

treat you like you're a smart adult.

Lacey:

These are the things that we're asking for from you.

Lacey:

But if you don't meet it every once in a while because of this and this

Lacey:

or because you're going on a trip and all these things, that's fine.

Lacey:

That's fine.

Lacey:

We'll figure it out.

Lacey:

And so I am so proud of myself for going into it with that attitude and

Lacey:

actually being heard and feeling oh, okay, this isn't going to be torture

Lacey:

for the next 20 something weeks.

Sara:

I, I am, I'm happy for you.

Sara:

And yeah, anyone listening has been through their own medical adventures where

Sara:

they're not being heard or they're not.

Sara:

Not being heard really.

Sara:

And so that's a great,

Lacey:

Medical trauma is something that I've heard more

Lacey:

and more being chronically ill.

Lacey:

And when we think of trauma, we think of very specific things.

Lacey:

When I'm realizing the reaction that I'm having now is a trauma response

Lacey:

of, this is how it was before.

Lacey:

So my body is responding in that way cause it knows that.

Lacey:

And so it's taking a little bit of retraining in my mind and body.

Lacey:

but those things are so sneaky and they really do permeate

Lacey:

in so many different ways.

Lacey:

Just validating anybody else who hears something in that, that they're

Lacey:

like, Ugh, yes, you are a person, you are allowed to have a voice.

Sara:

hopefully that helps somebody today who heard that.

Sara:

So for mine, it's a joy ripple.

Sara:

It's so beautiful.

Sara:

I'm so excited.

Sara:

So participant Teresa is a talented massage therapist.

Sara:

And.

Sara:

I cannot understate this.

Sara:

There's many different types of massage and Teresa is so unique in

Sara:

her knowledge of the body and her ability to tune in with the client and

Sara:

what they need and just next level.

Sara:

So she moved and she actually lives, not in the same city.

Sara:

And it's a little bit of a distance from another friend of mine who has

Sara:

been going through, It's been a shit sandwich on top of a shit sandwich.

Sara:

She has been dealing with so much and she's the type of person,

Sara:

this is my other friend, Danielle.

Sara:

She has been, she's just the type of person who gives of herself nonstop.

Sara:

And she's been showing up all in every direction.

Sara:

And so I wanted to be able to.

Sara:

To take care of her because she's taking care of everyone else.

Sara:

And so luckily where Teresa works and where my friend works is actually very

Sara:

close to each other, even though they live pretty far apart from each other.

Sara:

So this morning Teresa was able to pamper my friend.

Lacey:

Oh!

Sara:

of the joy ripple, because I want, I wanted my friend to feel

Sara:

supported cause she is doing so much.

Sara:

And Teresa was, Teresa is just magically joyful.

Sara:

And She like sent me a picture of the room and sent me updates.

Sara:

And so to know that I was able to help somebody from a far, I have

Sara:

tears in my eyes cause I just it just meant so much to me that, I could

Sara:

connect to wonderful people and put a little bit more joy out in the world.

Sara:

so I'm really happy about

Lacey:

My cheeks hurt, I'm smiling so hard from that.

Lacey:

Oh!

Lacey:

That makes

Sara:

It's yeah, so beautiful.

Sara:

So there's always something to be thankful for.

Sara:

Even with all the s sandwiches we deal with, all the pivoting,

Sara:

all of the crap that comes up.

Sara:

There's still beauty and there's still things that we can appreciate.

Lacey:

Absolutely.

Lacey:

Absolutely.

Lacey:

thank you listeners for staying along with us on this ride.

Lacey:

I hope you're as excited as we are for the, just the, I guess the ride,

Lacey:

the unexpectedness, but the excitement of everything that is to come.

Sara:

Yes.

Sara:

Thank you,

Sara:

Lacey.

Lacey:

you, Sara.

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