Shownotes
In this valuable episode of the "You World Order Podcast," host Kasey introduces Dalene Higgins, a Virtual Financial Coach, CEO, and podcast host of "Wealthy After 40". Dalene emphasizes the importance of mindset, consistency, and finding motivation in budgeting. The episode highlights the transformative power of financial coaching in changing lives and achieving long-term goals.
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Transcripts
Transcript
::Hello and welcome to the You World Order Podcast.
::Today, I'm very excited to introduce Dalene Higgins.
::Virtual Financial Coach, CEO and podcast host of Wealthy After 40.
::Hi, Dalene
::Welcome.
::Thank you, Kasey.
::I'm excited to be here.
::I'm so excited to have you here.
::This is going to be a great, wonderful conversation and I'm really excited to get into it.
::So why don't you just jump right in and just tell everyone about yourself, where you got started, your journey, where you're at now?
::Where you’re going everything about you.
::This is an episode about you.
::So no pressure there.
::I'm just really excited to kind of hear your journey.
::OK, awesome.
::So yeah, I have been a financial coach for.
::Just over a year.
::But what led me to it was June 1st of 2022. I retired, so prior to retiring, I served for 32 years in government with law enforcement and I was ready to just be done with that, you know, 9 to 5 punching the time clock. All of that thing so.
::I was 50 and I thought, what am I gonna do?
::You know?
::So prior to retirement.
::Throw in a bunch of ideas around.
::I wanted it to be something that I enjoyed, something that I loved because and I didn't.
::It's not that I didn't love my job, but I still wanted to enjoy every day, so I'm an avid reader, so I thought, well, I could go volunteer in the schools.
::And I'm like, ah, then I'm so in somebody else's timeline, you know, sorting through all of the things. And I came across financial coaching
::And it just struck a bell with me.
::I was like.
::You have just reached your financial goal, your financial dream, and this feeling that you're having.
::I decided I wanted others to feel this, and so I found the AFC PE, which is a certification.
::And then I also found a training to get me going.
::I mean, I had my course.
::I had my.
::Experience how to, you know, organize and set everything up, but just needed a little refining of support on how you actually, you know, Coach people through these things and so.
::I began my journey in January of 2022, Umm studying for all those exams and learning some more information and then started marketing Elevate Finances, which is my company name that I started and became official full time entrepreneur June 1 of 2022 so.
::Got going.
::And you know, as I love being a Coach.
::Which and I heard somebody else say, you know, I just want to help people with their numbers, but it's so much more than that being an entrepreneur, which is fine.
::You know, we have to do that to get out there and it's not that I haven't enjoyed the journey.
::It's been definitely growing.
::I've learned a lot.
::I've become a marketer.
::I'm not, you know, great, but.
::Getting there, we all have to learn something and move forward. But I love so I love coaching and I have, you know, loved this space that I found when I was 35. I was like ohh I can.
::Retire at the age of 48.
::If I have my, you know, ducks in a row, basically because the day I retire, I'm taking a 40% cut in pay.
::So my daughter was 8 years old, so we still had all of her time.
::You know, her growth we, you know.
::So it's not like I sat there and did nothing so that I could retire.
::I just want to share with everybody.
::I still had a journey.
::Of, you know, buying things and joining things.
::We had recreational property.
::We bought recreational vehicles, you know, my daughter went through soccer and then she was in band, you know, and all of the things, but also staying focused on what I wanted the end result to be.
::So, you know, trying to handle both which I get asked a lot of how do you handle now and the future and you know so that's really what I was doing from age 35 until age 50.
::And so you just kind of have to get focused on what you truly want and you know, sometimes I don't think that individuals spend enough time really seeking what their desires are and understanding what those are because once you fill it and once you know it's something you want to me, it becomes easier to obtain.
::Then it can go with anything in your life so.
::You know, just having that desire and then having a plan and budget, nobody likes that word so.
::Where I worked for the last 15 years, I helped cops learn how to budget and you know, so it was this horrible word, you know, what do we do and how do we do it?
::And it's a once a year thing.
::So, you know, I trained there was 22 of them every single year and I had all sorts of different personalities.
::I had those who are like, I will never learn this and I don't want to learn this and I can't understand this.
::So I would teach them from a different level than those who were.
::I want to learn this.
::I want to be good at this and I want to like this.
::And so I would teach them at that level.
::And then everywhere in between.
::So I feel like that has prepared me to be able to work with individuals.
::In their finances because, you know, if you add personal finances on the front of that, it is personal for everyone.
::And we're all individuals.
::We all think differently.
::View things differently, handle, you know, numbers are different for everybody.
::So I really love that and I support that in my coaching, like I don't have just, here's a spreadsheet we're going to put you in it and then you gotta use it.
::No, what do you want to do?
::What do you want from your numbers and?
::How much time do you want to spend with them?
::And you know, really working with the individual to create something that they're going to be passionate about, maybe not passionate, but that they're going to enjoy and that they're going to reach their passion.
::So yeah, I have loved my journey so far and.
::Trying to reach those who need my help and want my help and you know so.
::That's really, really great, especially nowadays, and congratulations on your journey because you know going from where you started from and you setting your own goals to where you are and now you kind of hey, you know these things have worked for me and now I want to help other people and.
::That that's coming from a wonderful place
::And I particularly love to talk with people because of all different type of coaching status.
::Right.
::Because, you know, we tend to think of coaches like life coach or emotional or spiritual or holistic.
::But finances are such a huge part of our lives.
::And it's so connected to.
::Life stresses, which can be emotional, and I think a lot of people don't know where to turn.
::It's easy to say we'll just save your money, if that's what you want in your life, and it's not that simple.
::I know I.
::Struggle with that. Exactly
::So that's really wonderful to hear that you've come up with a great process that works through the different.
::Possible anxieties, emotional connections with things, maybe helping. Yes
::People realize their potential
::Right, right. Yeah.
::You know, I think a lot of people think I want this or I want that in life not knowing how to get there.
::or not realizing that they can get there, but making you know, and it seems like you're the type of person to be.
::Able to get them to help them to believe.
::Yes, yes, yes, exactly, exactly.
::That they can get there.
::I've just been recently been working on really defining what I termed are the phases of budgeting.
::And so it's not even within these phases, it's not OK. The first one, you've got to take your numbers and you got to do this like eliminating all of that and just identifying the feelings and the emotions and being able to tell somebody like phase one is hard phase one. Nothing's going to work. It's going to be a mess and.
::You just gotta keep going, but once you discover what is causing the messes, then you moved into the next phase.
::Where you're like.
::Oh, that has to be in here, you know, and you just kind of work through these phases.
::And then the last Phase I called stability.
::It's kind of where I'm at, right.
::Like I'm in a stable with what I've got going on and not a lot of life changes are happening.
::I've reached my financial goal.
::You know, I still have goals aside from that.
::As well and still have to maintain everything that I've got going.
::On but really.
::Just recognizing that through the phases and understanding that you are going to experience, you know frustration.
::And upset and feeling like this isn't like you can't do this.
::And typically I tell people it's not that you can't do this.
::The numbers aren't working yet, so soon as you get your head around that, then you can start seeing.
::Ohh I've left things out and it's not you, it's the numbers and so.
::Being able to grow with your budget and stick with it, and I know it's hard.
::You know, a lot of people, they joined my Facebook group and they're like, I just need to stay consistent.
::I need to be motivated and you know, it's something that's easier for others, like for fitness.
::For me, I just need to be motivated.
::So I get it when people say I just need to be motivated, you know, whereas other somebody else might say, well, it's just easy.
::You just do it.
::You know, and so recognizing that everybody can be at a different point, but trying to find what it's like with your kids.
::Trying to find that one thing that motivates them to do the things they don't want to do, and so you know, that's the same with us.
::Well, what is going to motivate you to want to spend time with your numbers instead of avoiding them so that you don't have to avoid them anymore, right?
::It's it.
::You're avoiding it because something happened.
::But I bet that's not still the case.
::You just don't know and you don't dare look.
::And so get somebody on board with you to even take that first look.
::And it just is so scary and so hard.
::I was just gonna say the fear.
::That is, sorry to cut you off, but it's just when you say that's just like it is like that fear and that avoidance.
::No. Yeah.
::And I know I was reading a new website that sometimes you just trying to avoid it, that it's not real, that you aren't, you know that maybe I'm not struggling with the numbers.
::Like I'm not a numbers person, so like I am probably one of your best.
::Could be one of your best.
::clients because I just try to avoid it.
::Will cost and I just when you know up until the last minute, I pay everything that needs to pay.
::And I think that's a lot of people.
::I think we just go through the motions.
::And it that gets very exhausting, you know, and the worry all the time, especially nowadays when everything is so, so super expensive.
::And the stress and like when budgeting.
::Goes out the window. How do you handle if someone's like? Well, I made a budget and you know, but things are so out of control.
::And now, like I took my car the other day, and I obviously didn't budget a $3500, you know, repair bill, you know.
::So then you have to. Right
::Sit back.
::Like, how do you how do you handle?
::The what?
::Obviously without giving away your.
::Your secrets in your coaching, of course.
::But how do you handle the unexpected?
::So yeah, I want to share a story I was working with the client and we were tackling his debt.
::In the financial world.
::His dad had helped him pay it off a couple of times before, but he finally said.
::Something's broke.
::We need to do a different approach.
::I can't just keep paying it off for you.
::So we got working together and we actually discovered.
::The driver of his debt cause I believe that there is one.
::Aspect of your.
::Bills of your somewhere that is driving your net debt.
::And it's not just you're racking up your credit cards, you're spending money, you know, fruitlessly.
::His was actually his rent.
::You know, rent has gone up.
::And so he was like, struggling.
::And just at that point with a lot of other mindset issues, wasn't ready to tackle it on his own.
::So we got it squared away.
::Got everything set up in a budget that was comfortable and he sustainable to get him moving forward.
::And so we were at it about 3 weeks and his engine blew in his truck.
::And so, yeah, $10,000. And so I'm like, what did? OK, what did you do? What did you think?
::And he's like, I was so glad I was.
::Working with you.
::When this happened and I said OK, but go back again.
::And he realized that he had time to cool down because it was on a Friday he was headed to a party.
::It broke down, so you know.
::People were following, so they got him anyways, all squared up.
::So he goes.
::I couldn't do anything.
::I just had to let it be.
::And realizing that sometimes we just have to pause in the moment, even though you know that was his only modes of transportation.
::So as when he got back and was sharing that with me, I'm like, OK, So what do you want to do?
::What do you need to do?
::What are your options?
::And sometimes it's really just getting yourself outside.
::Of those emotions and you know, going OK now, what can I do and what do I do?
::And he actually ended up buying a vehicle.
::He qualified just fine
::On it, yes, it added more debt, but he was now able to go start a side hustle with Door Dash and Uber eats, because gas wouldn't cost him as much as it was in his other vehicle. So, you know, just trying to balance that and figure out the.
::Best the best plan for you in that moment minus the emotion.
::And I think that's where a lot of people are like, Oh my gosh.
::But I've gotta do something.
::And had he, you know, reacted with that and gone out on Saturday to the dealer and bought a brand new car.
::Then what you know? But no. He paused. Somebody's like you can borrow my car while you're figuring it out.
::You know, instead of just rushing into that next option, he weighed and he did his homework and it only took him about 6 ish weeks to really get it under control.
::And he's like, no, this is what I can do.
::And now I.
::Can do this and so yeah.
::It just.
::It is hard, and especially with inflation, you know, especially on groceries and all of that, but.
::And hindsight's 2020. But if you are saving anything, then when inflation hits you have the ability to make that adjustment.
::So, you know, really the biggest thing, the biggest rule you can start is, you know, living on less than you make.
::And sometimes we feel like we can't do that.
::My daughter just started her, you know, first career job and.
::But she's making decent money, and she's like, it's hard, mom, it's hard.
::And she's bought her a new car and all.
::And I said it is.
::It's rough when you're starting out, I said.
::But The thing is you've got to just stay the course and be good with it and grow with it.
::Instead of just always saying, it's always going to.
::be hard you know, I think sometimes we're like it's just always going to feel this way.
::So we.
::Make it feel that way.
::Yeah, yeah.
::And I, I love how you incorporate consistency and mindset because so many things in our lives rely on that.
::So why wouldn't this be different?
::You know, why wouldn't our finances be different?
::You know, you don't have to be a.
::Numbers person, but if.
::You know, if you set a plan.
::For yourself and also, and I think it's really great.
::Like the story, you know, thank you for sharing that.
::You know, he probably felt so comfortable too, to be able to.
::Discuss that outside of.
::His maybe his freak out right?
::So, like, I mean, yeah, I mean, I had my freak out with my car and now I, you know, I'm obviously I'm not working with anybody.
::But like, sometimes you just have to step back and say, OK, there has to be other options.
::You know, think of, think about it a little bit and take a breath, you know, maybe not right.
::Like you said, you're not going to.
::Get there right away.
::But I love how your support there helped him work through.
::Because he probably would have made a.
::A worse decision had he not?
::Right. Yeah
::Taken the breath or taking your advice or you know and having someone outside of it outside of your worry bubble.
::I love to call it because you see things like.
::Almost blurry because you know you're only focusing on.
::The car blew up, the car blew up the car.
::Blew up.
::OK.
::And then it's nice to have someone outside.
::Of that going.
::OK, so how are we gonna?
::Are we gonna?
::Work through this so I love how it's not just about the finances.
::You're actually helping people change habits.
::With consistency and I
::Love that.
::So why don't you tell me about?
::Some of like.
::Your big biggest successes?
::Obviously that's a successful story, but one is you go into some of your biggest successes cause I imagine that's gotta be very fulfilling when you're helping someone through a tough time and then getting them to the.
::Light at the end of the tunnel.
::Per se, they're reaching their goals.
::That must feel pretty amazing
::Yeah. Yeah, it it's.
::It's always fun.
::It's always, in fact, we ended at our three months, you know, so he's still continuing his journey.
::And I'm like my baby's going off to school by himself, you know?
::And it's like I got so attached.
::But he was such a good client too, like putting him putting in the work and just me allowing that space for him.
::I had another client who after 40 years, found herself divorced.
::And she had managed the money early on, before the children, and then once the children, you know, obviously she had.
::A lot of other activities and chores.
::She was taken care of, so he kind of took over and then he really became controlling with it.
::So when she came to me, she's like, I hate money.
::I don't want to do it, you know?
::And it was a lot of different reasons.
::And she had done it before, so it's.
::Wasn't even the fact that she didn't know how to do it.
::There was just a lot of ire with it.
::And you know, she even.
::Said I just spend despite him.
::So you know he'll cover it.
::He'll cover it.
::I'm like, OK, but you don't have that anymore.
::So working through.
::Those issues and now it's you, you've done it.
::before, let's create you a system and she was older, so I'm like I guess you're not a tech person.
::She's like, no, no.
::And I'm like, OK, pen and paper.
::Do you want to do you know?
::And so again, that just shows how I instead of going.
::Ohh hey, here's a spreadsheet, but you're not techie.
::I'm going to force you into this, you know?
::So I just said what was working for you.
::What have you been doing?
::You know, what do you know?
::And so we just kind of created a system that was as simple as she watched one account for her spending.
::And she had all the other bills coming up the other one and just kind of worked from there.
::And so to be able to lose that hate around the money because that had a whole lot of, you know, other stories behind it and not just money itself, but realizing that she could, she could do well.
::And she had a.
::I forget it was.
::Wasn't a coach, it was somebody else who would was helping her through this hard time of life, really getting into the feelings and the emotions of just the divorce itself.
::And she says you need to loosen up and have.
::Fun she goes.
::So I went shopping.
::I went on a shopping spree.
::And so she's like, I probably shouldn't have done that.
::And I said, well, So what are you gonna do?
::You've already done it.
::What are you going?
::To do you know.
::And so just.
::Working through those.
::As we work through the time, there's a lot of those things that come.
::Up that have been habit before.
::But just to reframe and just to look at it again and her go.
::Ohh I said well, did you buy fun stuff?
::She's like, yeah.
::And I said, So what are you not gonna be able to buy now that you spend it on this?
::That's all it means.
::It's just a shift.
::And she's like, oh, yeah, you're right.
::You know?
::So she wasn't too hard on herself after I explained, like, no, you know, I.
::And see how you're trying to fit two different models you know to have fun, to go think you know, go do that.
::And to you, that's fun.
::But then it's like ohh crap.
::Now I have to pay the consequences.
::But you can just shift around and just explore.
::So she was a lot of fun and then another one which was very.
::I want to say simple in a way, but this couple came and they're like we do OK with money, but I have no organization.
::I don't even know where to start.
::You know, she’s experienced ADD she, you know, and she's like, I just don't even know where to start.
::And I'm like, OK, well, what do you want?
::You know, what do you think and what could you handle and?
::So we worked through her, got her organized.
::And she's like, oh, my gosh, I see.
::I knew I had money for the things that I did, but now she was actually seeing the work of it, you know.
::And she knew they were OK.
::But she's like, are we really OK because there was no evidence that they truly were.
::OK, so yeah, working with her.
::And then I've coached.
::her two kids.
::Because she's like, I just want you to talk to them.
::So coach them, you know, through their just teenage years and just help them understand money.
::And I asked them, I.
::And so a 14 year old and a 16 year old.
::And I asked them where money came from.
::The 14 year old kind of looked towards her mom and I'm like, no, it doesn't come from your mom, you know.
::And then the 16 year old.
::They went as far as the mint, I said.
::Yeah, they make it there.
::But where does the money come from?
::You know?
::So it's interesting that.
::You know, just trying to talk to kids and I know, you know, talking about money isn't easy.
::A lot of people in this space that they've told me, I just don't talk to my kids about it, cause I was always told we didn't have money.
::Just going to say that, yeah, we were always talking.
::We don't talk about that.
::And so I have really good parents who never said we didn't have money.
::But as I.
::Got older.
::I'm like ohh the way that.
::My mom would shift.
::It you know, so it'd be like, hey, mom, you know, and this brand name shirt.
::And she's like, well, I'm sure that's great, but let's go see if we can find a different one at this store.
::I was like, OK, you know, and it just worked.
::And so.
::You know, trying to learn, you know, trying to talk to kids where you were in a situation where you felt like you came out of it hating money and you're in a scarcity mindset.
::And so now you're avoiding it with.
::Your kids is.
::Only going to create the same thing, but it's.
::I try to tell people you can talk about money without talking about the numbers.
::You know, where are you saving your money?
::What are you doing for your retirement?
::What are you doing for your insurance?
::Even who's taking care of your car insurance and you don't even have to talk numbers, but just start talking about things that you know have money.
::What are you doing now that groceries have gone up?
::You know that's an easy money conversation to have.
::And start talking about it more and with your kids.
::It's, you know, age appropriate.
::But it's like teach them from the get go that.
::But you know, you've got money, you've got to save it or spend it, but you can't have both.
::But if you spend it, it's gone, you know, and just kind of focusing on that way.
::I had a great episode this past week release with his name Sam Max Renick and his focus is on little kids like ages 3:00 to 7:00.
::He does songs he does coloring papers.
::But anyways I had him guessed on my podcast and he said we need to teach kids to spend to save.
::You know, spend your money to save it.
::So you're going to spend it into the Piggy Bank.
::You're going to spend it into the savings account.
::And I just love the way he talked about it and how to.
::Share with kids.
::And then he.
::Shared an experience from his growing up years.
::Hey, Dad, can we go down and get this from the, you know, corner Mart?
::He's like, no, you don't make the money.
::We make the money and we get to decide what we're gonna buy with it.
::If you really want that, where are you gonna get the money?
::You know, so just trying to tell him where money came from and.
::They didn't make the decisions as kids instead.
::And you know, his dad didn't say we don't have the money and he's like, I know now, we didn't have that money.
::But he just says we don't spend our money on that and you don't make decisions.
::And I just loved how to put it in perspective of, you know, parent to child.
::But yeah, just and then forced, you know, not forced him, but taught him to where to go to.
::Earn money and work, and then what are you going to do with your?
::Money. So.
::Yeah, that's so interesting that you.
::Beginning conversations.
::So I love that you spoke to the 14 year old, the 16 year old because I actually have a 14 year old with a 16.
::Year old and.
::My 16 year old just started working.
::So it's been very, very interesting.
::She started about like last October or something like that.
::And she's seeing now.
::And it's and it's.
::And it's really kind of remarkable to watch because there's such a more of an awareness now like previous it was.
::Hey, Mom, can we?
::You know, can we go out to the mall or?
::Hey, Mom, there was no connection to it.
::There was no.
::Where is the money coming from?
::There was not that connection.
::And then to the responsibility and understanding and then putting your.
::Work ethic into it.
::So she's just saving and saving, and she's been doing phenomenal.
::She's saving, saving, saving.
::So then the other.
::That we went to the mall last week.
::And there is there these sneakers that she's been eyeing for the longest time.
::And I was like, OK, well, you know, you're working now, you know, obviously, as a mother, I still do the necessities of being a parent.
::So when you need clothes, you're gonna get clothes for me, obviously, I'm going to feed you, obviously, yeah.
::You know you you're.
::Gonna need your eyeglasses and your contacts.
::But now I'm starting to.
::Say OK, you're working now, so like.
::If you want those shoes.
::And they were, you know, they were pretty pricey.
::And we saw them and then she put them back.
::And I can tell she was just being conscious of it and I and I let it be, and I let it be and.
::Stewed, she didn't.
::Get them that day.
::Second, Fast forward to the second time she went to the mall with a girlfriend of hers and she texted me a picture of them and she was like mom, I got them and I was so proud of her.
::And you know, I had to give her a little bit of a lesson.
::I said I'm so proud of you.
::And then she started looking that guilt step by her self like, ohh.
::But it's so much money.
::Yes, but you also work very hard for yourself and every now and then, as long as your responsibilities are met and you want to spend a little money, even know that it's gone out of your bank account and you understand that.
::You worked for it.
::Yeah, sure.
::You could save every single penny, but you it's OK to enjoy it.
::Yeah, it's OK to enjoy.
::So it's that was like a very proud like, you know kind of.
::Parent moment for me because you know her recognition and I don't.
::I just.
::I don't think that.
::You know, I don't think parents talking and I think to their children and I think that nowadays it's like it's still a hush hush thing.
::And that causes a.
::Lot of issues.
::Because you know the next generation coming up, there's no there's no finance classes in high schools and, you know, didn't even know what a checkbook is or, you know, they don't know these things.
::Right.
::So it.
::Not discussed, so I love your tactic of just talking about it and just making it a conversation.
::I think that's I love that I absolutely love that.
::Trickle down.
::So like I know what your target is, but once you start clearly.
::Connecting with people on the level of you're connecting people, then it's just going to start trickling down.
::That's where you're really like, starting to really help people and I and I absolutely love that.
::That's fantastic.
::That's really great.
::Thank you.
::Thank you.
::It's fun. Awesome
::You know, I'm in your demographic.
::So I'm.
::Very intrigued.
::But how do you think you know people?
::I mean, it's very hard to admit, right, that you have some troubles.
::How do you get over that kind of hump?
::I'm going to say of, you know, and I think this is very different and This is why I'm enjoying this conversation because when I used to think about someone who's giving me advice financially, it's like this cold office with a guy with, like, a tie.
::Up to his neck and like has like a calculator in front of him and it seems so cold and scary.
::And I think that's what a lot of people.
::Correlate with it and it becomes a scary thing and.
::How do you approach someone that?
::Is like super scared.
::About talking about their finance, because it could be.
::Also a very.
::It's guilt because they're spending wrong or fear of talking about it, admitting that like you've.
::Yeah, yeah.
::Made poor decisions and we went to.
::Right, right.
::that like how do you deal with that part of it and that kind?
::Of resistance.
::So definitely get a lot of that because it is being vulnerable.
::And I understand all of the feelings behind it.
::I was talking with my massage therapist and I'm like, you know, I wasn't perfect with my money.
::And she goes, you know, that's why I don't like going to my financial advisor because she's, like, so perfect.
::And she makes sure she tells me that.
::And I said, oh, no, no, no.
::She was not and is not.
::Perfect, you know.
::So I tried to share with people that yes, I'm here, but I had, you know, I made mistakes.
::I probably overspent at times.
::I indulged.
::You know, how do you make a right decision if you don't know what a wrong decision is?
::So you know it's I.
::They get caught up in the emotions of it and I totally understand the shame, the fear.
::They're embarrassed and I try to explain to those who say I'm just so embarrassed to come to you that I don't even look at it that way.
::I am such a numbers person.
::I've done it.
::For so long and it just excites me that I have a puzzle.
::So that's what I think of it as I have a puzzle to fix because you have the point you're at now.
::I don't care how you got there.
::Honestly, I do not care how you got there because it doesn't make.
::Any it doesn't matter to moving forward.
::So where you're at the day you come to me for session and where you want to go, which is going to be on to all of our sessions, but you know and then just determining that plan and that path and go, OK.
::So if you're going to want to do that, you know here here's how you can or, oh, here's some changes you're going to need to make.
::No judgment, no judgment, and I just try to explain to them, I really I really don't cause to me numbers have no emotion.
::I know you have emotion with your numbers and that's fine.
::But numbers don't have.
::emotion. You know one is a 1 with you or somebody else. And so it's just OK.
::Well, how's that one gonna fit into your final plan of, you know, a million or whatever it is.
::And so just, you know, just realizing that somebody who is a coach we don't tell you what to do either.
::right.
::We hold the space for you to get rid of those feelings and to look beyond.
::And because there's something you're good at, there's something that you enjoy doing.
::And there's talents that you have.
::So as we explore those then we just make the tweaks that need to happen to make those even more effective.
::And what your end goal is, so you know it's it definitely is hard to make that first step and to be vulnerable to somebody I always.
::Like the first time it came up, I was like, OK, but it's a virtual, so you're not having to come to, you know, my office, which I have books and my reading chair and all my stuff.
::But you get to stay in the warmth of your house or in the comfort of your bed, or wherever you know it's a little more comfortable.
::Yes, you're going to be vulnerable, but you're still in that safe space.
::So I love where, you know, we have gone virtual with a lot of these coaching things that it just allows you to feel safe.
::With something that you know you're going have to deliver that you don't feel comfortable in doing.
::So I really think that has helped a lot of people deal with whatever area of coaching they're getting it just.
::You know, you think like you think about it, you're in your house, you're supported, but then you're just gonna word vomit to somebody about how, how and what is going on, and then they're going to help you pick up the pieces all the time.
::You're sitting in your house and you go.
::OK, now I've got the pieces.
::And she's told me what to do.
::Then I can go and do it because you're right where you need to be to go start that, whereas if you drove to an office.
::OK, you're not comfortable.
::Are you going to share as more as openly as you would if you were at your home and then you have to leave there with the pieces and who knows, you might stop for lunch or you might grab a snack or something.
::And by the time you get home, you'll be like, well, I'm not really clear on those pieces now.
::So I think, you know, being virtual.
::can just be such an advantage in these in these vulnerable situations of coaching.
::So I, you know, I would hope people would maybe find the comfort in that and then just recognize that as coaches really we just want.
::To serve people.
::We just want to help.
::I just want to help people be happy with what their life is and 95% of our lives take money, right?
::Everything takes money, really, except for breathing, because air is free.
::I think you know.
::Right.
::So, yeah, it's just crazy.
::No, and that's fantastic.
::And I think you're right.
::You know, when some.
::one’s in a more comfortable environment makes it a lot easier and definitely your aspect of it and your platform for that.
::I think in my mind would be more.
::Successful because that's scary to walk up.
::To you know, someone’s, you.
::Know 4th floor, you know office
::That's, you know, in in, you know in a pin suit, you know, pinstripe suit and it's intimidating it's intimidating and you immediately feel like you're you know you did something wrong
::Even if this is a nice person in the world.
::Right.
::with the.
::Right.
::Environment and they're definitely not tapping into emotions and habits and stuff, they're going.
::To pretty much.
::Give you like a booklet and a spreadsheet and say this is what you need to do and you know they'll be about numbers.
::Too, but they're.
::Not it the thing is that.
::I believe that the issues.
::Would keep happening if you don't solve.
::The emotions that are causing you to make those decisions, or pinpointing the actual problem, you know, it's not easy sometimes.
::Well, just save dot dot dot amount of money and sometimes it's just not that simple all the time.
::Exactly. Exactly.
::So I love, I love it.
::I love it.
::I love your aim because it makes it.
::Makes it OK to.
::Talk about.
::Yes, yes, yes.
::Makes it OK to talk about it, but I would love for our listeners to find you.
::So why don't you just give us some information about how someone can contact you, your website, everything about you where?
::Where can they find?
::All right, so I always love to say if you want to learn more about me head on over to Instagram, elevate, under score finances, where I show a little more personality.
::If you're looking for support immediate support, my Facebook group, all things personal finance.
::Basically, we're focused on, you know, finding freedom with our money.
::And my website is www.elevatefinances dot us and I have my packages on there. Umm it links to my.
::Podcast, but you can find my podcast, which is wealthy after 40 on any listening platform, and I think I just released episode 18, which I was talking about with Samex renix.
::So there's some good info out there and some more coming, and I'm also on LinkedIn if you want to head over that way as well under Dalene Higgins.
::Wonderful Dalene.
::And I thank you so much.
::You opened my eyes.
::I almost feel like it's financial therapy in in a way.
::And I and I believe that breeds success.
::And when you breed success, you know you're going to make change and you're going to do good things.
::And I really do believe that your process does that.
::So thank you so much for sharing all of this information and.
::Dalene just gave all of her contact information and we'll list it as well when we drop the episode so that people can get.
::In contact if they need.
::Thank you.
::Thank you so much for coming on today.
::Thank you.
