Samantha and Melissa reflect on the joy and challenges of hosting this years charity event, highlighting concerns if next year they plan to continue the tradition. Shoutout to performers Carey and the Feel and headliner, Clejan.

Shifting gears, they introduce Katharine Giovanni, an expert on forgiveness who shares a comprehensive system to achieve true forgiveness. Katharine explains the process while establishing its ok to be selfish. It's ok to forgive for self-healing and removing accumulated negative energy. She discusses steps for forgiving others, oneself, and even money.

Katharine also explores past life impacts on present challenges, revealing insights on how unresolved issues traverse lifetimes. The conversation culminates into underscoring that true forgiveness can open doors to freedom, joy, and ultimately becoming the person one is meant to be.

You'll be thankful you heard this one right before the holidays.

• Become a Squad member to get FULL recordings with our guest
• Start your journey of forgiveness with Katharine Giovanni .
• Request to be on the show. Join our Network, Podmatch

What's up?

Skirts up, squad.

Did you just take my wine?

I did.

It's Samantha and Melissa.

I'm going to actually tell you guys how it is right now.

It was so fun.

We couldn't even make it up.

I'm gonna do it.

I'm gonna wear it in public.

And then she looks at me and she goes, that's what Jesus is for.

We are about normalizing things that are.

Hard to talk about.

I was like deer in headlights.

Skirts out, but keep your pant.

Hey, guys, welcome back.

It's Samantha and Melissa.

That was really enthusiastic.

I was like.

And Melissa, I love it.

I am here, though.

So this last week we finally had our event with clean for canine assistance.

Yes, we did.

We did.

How did you feel that it went?

So I think it was a lot of fun.

I actually really, really, really enjoyed our opening band.

That was who I enjoyed so much.

Yeah, there was one song and he was like, I don't usually just tell like the story of a song before I start, but on this one I'm just going to let you guys know that, yeah, this is a song about, you know, working 80 hours a week.

For what?

Or something.

I can't remember what he said, but I had literally just said that like 20 minutes earlier at the event to someone else.

I was like, I feel like I'm working, working, working all the time.

And sometimes I wonder, like, what's it for?

And his song.

Not that I couldn't hear all the lyrics because it was so loud.

Yeah, but it was so good.

And it was just like, he sees me.

The song is for me, like, I don't know, but yeah, like, so I loved them.

I could keep going on and on about them and I was so glad that you got them there.

Yeah, it.

It turned out fun.

I think that I'm proud that we got on stage and that we talked and I feel like you are.

I was worried that if.

No, I botched it.

We've done.

I just ignored you.

It's fine.

No, I feel like usually like we over plan and so then that comes across like when we're talking.

Talking.

Yeah.

And then like the nerves are so high, which, don't get me wrong, like I was really, really nervous, but words still came out and I don't think I sounded greatly dumb.

No, it was great.

I thought it was good.

And we were able to feed off of each other pretty naturally.

And so I think it.

I think it went well.

Yes.

And actually I wanted to say that I was trying to shout out clean and then I forgot to shout out Carrie in the feels.

And you were like.

And Carrie in the fields.

And I was like, oh, my gosh, how could I have forgotten that?

So I just want to say maybe I mentioned them.

Thank God you did.

Because.

Because I.

After I got down, I was like, how could I?

Well, also, I'll be honest, I'm an idiot.

And I didn't realize that you booked them.

For some reason, I thought they were somehow just opening for Clejean.

Oh, no.

Yeah.

Oh.

And I found out that.

That night.

Yeah.

Oh, okay.

Is that why you kept saying, like, man, it's just so funny that you went to school with them?

Yes.

Oh, that is so funny.

And you kept being like, yeah, yeah, that's why they're here.

It's so funny.

I know.

I'm hilarious because I'm so dumb.

No, just kidding.

But it was hilarious.

No, but, yeah, the night was so fun.

Did you see the girl that kissed him during the photo being taken?

Like, you should ask somebody's permission.

Like, man, these people be wild.

And.

And this was like a small.

A small crowd.

Wow.

So I got to meet somebody like that, that I was, like, super, like, in love with.

Actually, I'm wearing the shirt today that's so random, because this was not on purpose, but his.

It's Frank Turner.

He's like a.

An English punk rock style okay kind of guy.

And I've been.

I've loved him forever.

And I went to a meet and greet that was beforehand.

Like, a signing.

Like, he was signing people's things.

And my friend who I was with was like, you know, she's never been to a.

A gig like this.

Like, he's like, what?

And I was like, yeah.

And he's like, no.

And he's like, what's your name?

And so in the middle of the concert, he pulled me up on stage, and it was big.

Like, there was tons of people there.

And, like, I had to go up, and the security guard had to help me get up because the stage was as tall as me.

I was wearing a dress.

But I got up there and he.

He let everybody know, like, hey, let's hear it from Melissa.

I met her earlier today.

I really like her.

And he gave me a harmonica.

And he's like, all right, we're going to sing.

We're going to play together.

And I'd never played a harmonic in my life.

And I just, like, fucking went to town.

Yeah.

And I felt like I was.

I felt the energy and the adrenaline was, like, so high.

And Actually, maybe that's part of what this girl is feeling when she was filming Carrie, right?

And in that, I was at.

And his feels.

But what Granny was in his feel.

He was.

But anyway, like, the adrenal so high.

And I just went to town as if I knew how to play the harmonica, and I didn't.

And then later, like, I had people like, oh, you're the girl that was on stage.

And someone bought me a beer, had this, and it was just so fun.

What is my point?

My point is I've been there.

Where?

Oh, and then we.

Then we got to meet him again after he came back out and nice.

And he.

And he did give me, like, a hug, and he goes, this is.

I'll never forget this line because, you know, I'm still, like, slightly obsessed.

But he gave me a hug, and he goes, let's get another picture together because we look so good together.

And I was like.

But I still never would have kissed him.

Like, never.

Like, even with the, like, actual interaction like that, Like, I would have been like, I. I.

Not without asking, like, right.

Can I kiss you on the cheek for the picture?

Right.

Yeah, it was.

It was interesting.

Do you have a fail you'd like to share?

Well, just the fact I was only five minutes late, but it was because there was a new kitten running around my apartment complex.

And that was what I wanted to.

Talk about is just he was so cute.

And usually when you're.

Okay.

So I was getting Oliver, and I was putting him in the car, and I saw this kitten, like, run across the.

Like, far across the parking lot.

And I was like, oh, my gosh, there's a new kitten here that I've never seen before.

So I was like, here, kitty, kitty, kitty.

And it started beelining straight towards me.

And I was like, this cat might.

Let me pick it up.

I got really excited, so I, like.

Shoved all of her in the car because I was like, you're not ruining this for me.

And then.

But then it still wouldn't come.

It got, like, five minutes, five feet away from me, and it was just doing these cute little, like, pathetic squeaks.

So it stayed there, and it let me talk to it, but it wouldn't come any closer than about five feet.

So I think I'm gonna try again later.

I forgot to tell you.

So, Melissa, remember at the beginning of the show, clision was like, hey, let's all go out to the bars afterwards and get some drinks.

Yeah.

And so I wanted to go, but I just couldn't.

Like, I couldn't have, like, gone and drank and played and then driven home.

Right.

And it was already so late.

It was already, like, midnight almost.

And so the concert was over, and I had Courtney and some friends with.

With me, Melissa.

And so Melissa was like, yeah, I don't think I'm gonna go out anymore.

And.

And we're all like, okay, we're.

We're getting.

We'll still go.

Yeah.

Okay.

Do you want to know how it went?

Of course.

Okay, I'm going to tell you.

How did it go?

Tell me.

Okay.

So we're really, really excited.

I mean, we're going to get to go to the bars and drink with cliche.

So it's like, you know, we get to be seen with, like, a famous person essentially, at the bars, and we're really excited.

And we get an Uber because I though I was, like, 100% sober.

I do not do well in cities and towns and roads.

And if you don't, that's a whole nother level of, like, anxiety.

Dr. Driving people.

Yeah.

And with it being, like, a big game weekend, like, there's gonna be cops everywhere.

And so Simon's like, I know that you can drive, but it's probably best not to.

So we Ubered.

So we all got into an Uber and we were supposed to meet Clejean.

He wanted to go to 90s bar, and he wanted to go to Flanagan's because those are two of the bars that he used to hang out at when he was in uga, and so he just wanted to go back and visit him.

So great.

We got into downtown before him, and 90s bar was wrapped around the building to, like, get in.

Oh, wow.

Yeah.

And so I take a picture and I send it to him.

And I was like, this is probably not gonna happen, but, you know, Flanagan's isn't crazy.

And then, I mean, we had just been out of the car for, like, five seconds, and there's just drunk people everywhere.

And we watched this, like, adult male, like, somehow fall out drunk at a crosswalk.

And then his friends pull him up and.

And then, like, you know how, like, the Grinch, like, does that creepy, like, high knee walk?

Yes.

He starts doing that across this crosswalk after he, like.

So we're, like, dying, and we're like, this is what we're about to hang out with.

So I texted cliche.

And I said, please don't hate us.

I'm feeling really seizure.

Ish.

We're going to go back.

And then we got back in the.

Uber and went home.

No, you didn't that.

Hilarious.

I'll tell you what, though.

There is just.

I'm not saying I don't like to have fun and have a good time, but there are certain crowds that just aren't the same as when you were in college.

We, we were laughing, we were like, damn, we must be old because me, Courtney and our friend Jaden, we were just like, nah, let's just, let's just go back and.

Yeah, and we feel you.

Yeah, we, we Uber back to my car.

We went.

I could have gone with you.

I could have taken an Uber ride with you.

Right?

Yeah, it would have been fun.

And then we got back in my car, we got McDonald's, and we went home and we went to bed.

Little Betty bed.

Okay.

At like one o' clock in the morning.

So did Courtney and Jaden come over and.

Yeah, they ended up staying at my house.

Good.

So, yeah, I just wanted to tell you how that outing went and I.

Forgot what happened with.

Did you like, have like a goodbye moment with Clayson or just kind of.

Sorry.

Seizing up.

See ya.

Yeah, it was just a text message.

It was.

Is that like ghosting kind of.

No, it's not a ghost.

Because I at least told him that.

No, it's not a ghost at all.

I felt so bad, but I was like, yeah, this is.

How did he act?

He just said, oh, no, I hope you guys, I hope you feel better.

Was he going out with other, like, fans?

I hope so.

Oh, you're not sure.

Oh, whoops, that happened.

That's hilarious.

Yeah, I'm sure.

Do I think I possibly missed out on an opportunity?

Maybe.

Do I regret it?

No.

Good.

That's right.

But my, my fail, I feel like.

So last year, you know, after the event, I felt like that was like the grand fail.

Right.

And we had like a whole episode on it.

And this year I feel like the concert was even more of a fail.

Because last year we can say that even though it didn't turn out the way that we thought and we put so, so much work and effort into it, we still, at the end of the day, were able to help all, like, all the kids that we expected and hope to help and all the families.

And so it really wasn't a fail.

It just wasn't what we thought.

This was an epic fail.

I mean, the crowd was incredibly small.

We had room for 200 people.

We had what, 60 actually show up?

If that.

If that.

And the.

Yeah.

What's a bummer is that no one, even from canine assistance was even able to Come.

And so then that was kind of a bummer because it's like, are we, like.

Is our time and effort and everything that we tried, like, not worth, like, you know, like, were we not valued?

It's just kind of how I feel.

Felt and feel.

And then.

And I agree.

Yeah, that way too.

It made me very sad that we're.

Well, especially you.

I say we, but really, this is all Sam's work that she put a lot of work into.

And then like, well, thank you.

Well, it just made me sad that there was.

It.

I'm hoping that they're okay and it wasn't just a lack of respect, I hope.

But it.

But I'm.

Yeah, we did have one semi sponsor.

We weren't really able to get any sponsors.

So that, like, really hurt me.

I was, like, really sad about that.

And we did kind of get one.

And they asked me if there was any marketing materials that they could share, like, as they.

Because they were like, basically donating proceeds of, like, XYZ or whatever.

And they.

I sent them the marketing thing and then they made their own and took our name off of it.

And.

What.

Yes.

It's like, I didn't know this story.

Over and over again.

It's like people say that they want to help the, you know, cause that we're working for, but then it's like they're embarrassed of our name.

And like, our name always gets taken off.

And so it doesn't even matter how much, like, good we're trying to put out.

Like, it's like we keep getting the forgotten.

And our name means so much.

And so, like, why.

Why do other businesses, like, why are they ashamed of that?

Like, even though our name stands for something and is powerful and is good.

And so I just feel like.

Do you think they were ashamed?

What?

You'll have to tell me later.

It's a family establishment, so I feel like, yes, they.

I feel like they're ashamed of the name.

Yeah.

Okay.

100.

Okay, like 100.

And I say all of this because, truthfully, these are just like the, you know, the little seeds that led to me feeling like this concert was an epic fail.

But the epic, epic fail is that the only amount of money that we brought in was exactly what I spent to bring Cliche on to the event.

Oh, I wanted to ask you, but.

I.

Yeah, I really wanna.

I did not wanna ask you there with.

In front of me.

Thank you.

Because I had already admitted it this time because he's like, on the car right there.

He's like, I'm so proud of you.

Like, this is amazing.

And you're doing so much, and you're.

You know, you guys are helping people, and, like, this is just amazing.

Amazing.

I'm so proud of you.

And I just looked at him and I was like, okay, no matter what you think after I tell you this, I cannot hear it right now, but, like, you're sitting here telling me how proud you are of me, and this was the biggest fail of my life.

Like, I spent what I spent to bring him here is what the ticket sales brought in.

So essentially, we're not helping a single person.

I was like, so that.

What are you proud of?

And then I started bawling, and so I was like, yeah, please don't.

I just.

I don't want to hear anything.

Like, it's just.

Let's get this night over.

It's fine.

That.

Wow.

I have so many emotions with you on that.

The first thing that came to my mind was feeling bad because last year I was able to help with the event and financially do some support, like, there, and I.

This year has been so hard for the shop.

And this year, I didn't help at all.

I didn't ask you to help.

And you know.

I know, I know, I know.

But I wanted to because I.

It was a cause and I was excited for it.

So at first, I feel bad about that, but it is what it is.

I'm not saying.

And then second my thought was when you said, but I totally get it when you're like, please don't try to give me those positive, like, don't say that right now.

I can't hear it right now.

It's just making me sad.

Yeah.

Yeah.

No, I get that.

That.

That feeling came over me, too.

But then the last thing was when you said, wait, for what?

What are you proud of?

I thought, but you still did all the work.

You still did try to pull something good together.

We're.

I'm proud of who you are, and I think Sam is.

Simon is, too.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And that's.

That's fair.

And not just the intention, but literally who you are.

Like, you're.

You're somebody who has big visions, and you want to do things for other people, the world, like.

And it makes me.

Makes my heart melt.

Oh, thank you.

Last year, I took some.

Some learnings and certain things that I didn't bring into this year, and those things worked out well.

And so now I just have more things to learn from, and I think that maybe this isn't what we should be doing and spending our energy on next year.

Unless someone sees the.

In our platform and wants us to help them.

Yeah, I think that's kind of where I'm at.

Like we're, we've made it clear we're open in here to help the community, but they have to want it more than we do or as much.

100.

100.

And actually I was just listening to the neurologist talk the other day and she was like, how she had like her friend, I say talk the other day as if we were on the phone.

But no, I was listening to our episode and she was saying how her friend needed to see this guy for free.

And the friend is like, I'll only do it once because he won't value it.

And then you were like, that's what Melissa Walker says.

And like it all goes back to.

Yeah, they have to see the value and appreciate it.

I'm gonna leave that there.

I just wanted to get that off my chest.

That that's, you know, that's just how I felt now to bring it back up.

I want to say that this episode is really cool.

I highly encourage you guys that if you are, you know, Thanksgiving's coming up and the holidays are coming up and if you are finding yourself loathing certain people that you have to be around, like, I hope you consider this episode as like a guide to freedom and really like kind of listen to it, take it to heart and maybe use it so that your holidays aren't spent in a negative way.

Yeah, I just listened to it last night actually, while I was working.

Sam, you did a great job by the way.

Thanks.

And yeah, you really did.

And she is so funny.

She is hilarious.

She's.

Yeah, she has such a great sense of humor.

It kind of made me think.

I'm gonna do her techniques.

I'm gonna sit down and.

And the funny thing is I feel like I'm in a great place.

I don't need to forgive anybody, but I feel like we all do there.

It's always there.

There's just, you know, if we think we don't.

So I'm gonna sit down, I'm gonna make a list and I'm gonna so listen to the episode and you.

Today we have with us Catherine Giovanni.

She's an award winning author, a international speaker, a transformation mentor, and a past life intuitive.

And we are here to talk about forgiveness.

But I also have a lot of other things to talk about too, so welcome.

Thank you so much for having me.

I appreciate it.

Yes.

Oh, and I should mention that Melissa wanted to be here with us for this conversation, but she had an awesome opportunity come up for her quilting business, so I told her to absolutely, absolutely do that.

And so hopefully it can be just as fun without her.

No worries.

But, yeah.

So thanks for being here.

Well, there is so much to go.

First of all, Giovanni, love that I'm the whitest Italian ever.

Yes.

You know, I'm.

I'm.

I'm actually not Italian by birth.

I'm Italian by marriage.

Yeah.

As I said.

As I said before, you hit record, some people marry for money, some people marry for food.

I married for food.

We will never starve.

The man is a phenomenal cook.

I do cook.

I haven't killed anybody lately, so.

But there's probably a reason you want him in the kitchen and not me.

Like, you really want him in the kitchen.

Same.

I don't know what episodes you may have heard from us, but I'm really good at catching things on fire, so the kids prefer if I'm not in the kitchen, so works for me.

I cook my recipe.

So if I have a recipe in front of me, I'm good.

And I love to bake.

So I do the desserts.

He does everything else.

So we're a match made in heaven.

No, you see, Toxic trait.

I forget to read the instructions.

I look at the ingredients, and then I just throw shit together and hope for the best.

And then I read the instructions.

I go, oh, no, I did that wrong.

I've done that.

But okay, so I think you just mentioned that you have a book that just got published, and.

And you have a class that is going live.

So let's talk about that first.

Yeah.

The.

The ultimate path to forgiveness, unlocking your power, came out last year, I believe, and it is an actual system on how to forgive.

And my class comes out on Wednesday.

But everybody tells us to forgive.

Your teacher, your pastor, your.

Everybody.

Everybody.

Okay, how.

How.

What do I.

Just say the word and hope something sticks?

How do you forgive?

But also, it's like, more is.

What if I don't want to?

Exactly.

Then what do you do?

So I've come up with an exact system on how to forgive people, including that person you swore you'd never forgive for the rest of your life that you're holding on to.

I have.

I have a way to forgive those people, too.

So anything, like, even if it is something that you don't want to forgive, because it just feels, like, absolutely unforgivable.

Right.

So on a 10 scale, with 10 being an unforgivable dumpster fire.

Right.

And one being the easiest person in the world to forgive.

Every single person listening to this broadcast, 10 out of 10 of you are thinking of their number 10 person, and that's completely reasonable because they're the ones that your world.

But you don't have to forgive the unforgivable.

Why?

Because there's a lot of people.

Places and things.

I did say places and things.

Please don't.

Don't click off to another podcast.

Stay with me.

That you can forgive before you even get to that dumpster fire of a person.

There's a lot of other.

There's a lot of other roads we go down before we even get there that we do those last.

You're talking about, like, a buildup of forgiveness, like you're starting small.

Forgiveness.

Your number 10 unforgivable person.

The person when you're.

When you're writing a list and you say, well, who do I have to forgive?

The top three names that come out if you write down in those papers, they're usually a 10.

Okay.

They might be your parents.

They might be your ex.

They might be.

They could be anybody.

They could be the bully in school.

They could be the person who attacked you in the park.

It's that.

We all have those.

Unforgivable.

I'm never going to forgive that person.

My father.

Yeah, I got you.

We can put mine on the list, too.

Is that, like, the hardest thing that you've had to forgive?

Or have you?

Yeah, my dad was one of the hardest people.

Now I've actually forgiven him.

But this is a marathon, not a sprint.

And there's some.

There's some things about forgiveness that's just.

Everybody says it's just plain wrong.

There's some falsehoods out there, so let me go through a few of them.

Yeah.

Just because I forgive you doesn't mean I want a relationship with you.

Honestly, I probably don't.

I probably have boundaries in space in place.

Yeah.

Just because I forgive you, this is the big one.

This is what 10 out of 10 people believe, and it's absolutely wrong.

Just because I forgive you doesn't mean I'm all of a sudden giving you a pass.

It doesn't mean I'm weak.

It doesn't mean I'm giving in and saying, okay, after all these years, you were right and I was wrong.

That's not what it means.

Forgiveness is selfish.

You do it for you.

Forgiveness, the formal definition for me, says, I want you out of my head.

That's it.

I don't want to think about you.

I don't want to dream about you.

I don't want to go into a bakery and smell an apple pie.

And I'm angry at my mother, and all of a sudden I'm thinking of my mom.

I want the triggers to stop.

I want my life back.

That's what forgiveness means.

It.

You don't have to reach out to these people.

It's not like AA and recovery programs.

I've been sober for 35 years.

And when you first go into.

You know, when you first start recovery, they want you to make amends.

Okay.

I was really a very shy person, and I come from a very dysfunctional house filled with alcoholism.

I tried.

I got bullied in school.

I tried to commit suicide in the eighth grade because of all these things.

And eventually that's probably why I'm a forgiveness coach, because the universe, which has a really good sense of humor, by the way, has gifted me with more than enough things to forgive.

So there's a lot of water under the bridge.

But, you know, I just kind of bumbled through life.

And then my mother.

My mother, in a drunken stupor, fell down a flight of stairs, broke her hip, and ended up in the hospital.

Even my mother couldn't get a gin and tonic in the hospital, so she dried out.

We sent her to rehab, and we spent the next three years closer than sisters.

We were tight.

We forgave each other.

We had long talks.

We.

We practically finished each other's sentences.

And then she got cancer and died.

And I eventually got breast cancer myself.

I'm 13 years cancer free.

Told you there's a lot of water under the bridge.

But when she died, everybody in their life has a flashpoint.

Everybody goes through it.

And that's when my life changed.

Because I realized intuitively that if I didn't quit drinking and clean up my act, I was going to die, too.

So I quit drinking was the only New Year's resolution I ever kept.

And I.

When you.

This was in the 9th.

This was.

Never mind what year it was.

It was in the last century, and it was before computers, so that's how old I am.

And if I could have texted these people, it would have been brilliant.

I would have loved that.

But no, you're supposed to make events.

So I had two choices.

I could either call them up on the phone, which was horrific, because you know they're going to yell at you, or which was worse.

You have to see them in person, see the whites of their eyes.

I didn't want to do either.

So I decided to forgive people in the quiet of my own apartment and not tell anybody, which is one of the first steps to my system.

And you don't have to tell anybody.

You can do it in the quiet of your own apartment.

You don't have to tell anybody.

You don't have to reach out and talk to them.

You forgive for you.

It's selfish.

You don't forgive for them.

They don't.

They're not even thinking about you could be your ex boyfriend, and they're, you know, they're off, they're dating again.

They're having fun.

And you're the one sitting in your kitchen with, you know, with a pint of Ben and Jerry's ice cream, crying your eyes out, wanting them to be miserable.

They're not miserable.

They're not even thinking about you, but you're miserable.

Buddha said, you know, Buddha said anger is.

Is.

Is like drinking poison and hoping the other person dies.

And that's what we're all doing.

So the trick to forgiveness is to forgive for you.

It's selfish.

You don't forgive for them because they don't care.

You forgive for you to get it out of your system so you can be the person that you want to be.

Yeah, I heard you say two things.

So I heard you say that one of the things that kind of started this was going through AA and having to make amends.

How does making amends differ from forgiveness?

Because it sounds like the people that you needed to make amends with are the ones that maybe needed to do the forgiving, or are they kind of.

The same when it.

When you.

For.

When you're forgiving for you so you can get them out of your head.

If you've gone through recovery and you've hurt a bunch of people and you feel very strongly that you need to reach out to your mother or your boyfriend or whoever and say, listen, you know, face to face.

I'm sorry.

I shouldn't have done that.

Do it.

100%.

Do it.

This is a very personal system, but in my case, I was a very shy person, and I just.

I wanted to.

I wanted to forgive a bunch of people, but I didn't want to.

You know, a lot of the people on my list were dead, you know, so some of, you know, you think that they, you know, you think the train has left the station.

You could forgive dead people in my system because if they're Alive and well in your head.

It doesn't matter where they are or.

Or not.

Because they're living in my head.

That makes sense.

You never got closure with this person.

Okay, here's your chance.

I don't care if they're dead.

Here's your chance to get closure.

This.

My forgiveness system is 100% for you.

100% for you.

And it's a one.

One size fits all.

Sort of.

Let me tell you.

Let me go say that.

Let me go give it to us.

Okay.

I'm gonna.

And you're getting the benefit of.

I have a second book on forgiveness coming out.

And my.

My.

My class that's coming out on Wednesday is actually teaching even more so.

But I'm going to.

I'm going to talk to you about it right now.

So you're going to learn how to forgive other people, right?

Then you're going to learn how to forgive yourself.

That was a question.

And then you're going to learn how to forgive money.

Stay with me.

Okay.

And we're going to learn how to forgive the unforgivable.

So buckle.

And I think I can do this in the time slot you've given me.

Pretty sure I can.

So what I want everybody to do is I really want them to be alone in a room.

And I want you to turn your cell phone off.

And I know that's making people twitch.

And if it's making you twitch because you just can't turn your phone off, then at least put it.

Put it on.

Silence.

So hear it.

Because if it dances on your desk, you're going to want to see who it is.

And I really want you alone and focused.

Then I want you to take a piece of paper and a pen or your phone.

I really don't care.

And I want you to write a list of all the people you think you need to forgive.

All of them.

Your first three people on the list are probably going to be the people you're most angry at.

Could be your ex.

It could be your sibling.

It could be.

It could be your parents.

Family really messes you up.

Right?

And then I want you to keep going.

I want you to write a list from everybody from the time you were playing in the sand in the.

In the park to present day.

That kid in high school who still.

Who.

Who wore your sweater and stained it and ruined it.

Put that kid's name down.

The person who cut you off on I95 south yesterday, and you got a little road rage.

Write that person down.

The person who was right in the Middle of the grocery aisle.

You wanted to get around.

They were 152 years old.

You couldn't get around.

You were in a rush.

It was on aisle four of the grocery store.

Write that lady down.

You can forgive her.

Come on.

She was 152 years old.

Come on.

You could forgive that person.

The person who stole your sandwich yesterday at work, in the lunchroom, out of the refrigerator, and your name is on it.

It's always on it.

Yeah.

Hot sauce in it.

Tomorrow, forgive that person.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So I want you to write all of these people down on a list.

One big beefy list.

And then I want you to rate them from 1 to 10, one being super easy and 10 being unforgivable.

I'm never going to forgive them.

And then I want you to start with the easy ones and work your way up.

So what you're going to do is you're going to be alone in a room, under a tree, on your bed.

I don't care where you are.

But I really want all humans out of the room, especially little humans.

The dog can be in there if it can be quiet.

And I want you to sit in your bed or in your chair.

And I want you to imagine the.

Take the first person on the list, the one you labeled a number one, let's say the person in high school.

Right.

Who stained your sweater, whatever.

And I want you to imagine that high school person is standing in front of you, not the adult.

I want you to imagine that the kid from high school is standing in front of you.

And if you are one of these people that can't imagine these things in your mind, put a chair in front of you and talk to the chair.

You could even put the person's name on the.

On the chair if you want to.

Right.

Or your old high school yearbook, really, if you need a prop.

And then talk to the chair, because this is a level one person.

It's easy peasy.

You probably won't have a lot to say because it's level one.

It's an easily tossable person.

Right?

So say whatever it is you want to say.

Then I want you to put your hand in your heart.

And you really only do that for you, because the words really don't matter.

It's the energy behind the words that makes the most difference.

And I'm going to give you the mantra.

But in the mantra is the secret sauce to the whole thing.

I had so many people looking at me and saying, you know, Catherine, I did the work.

I did forgive them, but they're not staying forgiven.

I saw them at a party recently and I got mad again and all the memories came back again and it took me two days to calm down.

What happened?

It was a trigger.

How do you get rid of the triggers?

They're not staying forgiven because you didn't forgive the energy.

So this is turning into energy work.

Well, yeah.

Everything on our planet, science has proven that everything on our planet, including the little silver microphone I'm talking into, has an energy field around it.

And when you get angry, everybody, nobody thinks these things but me.

I'm the only hairpin that thinks these things.

But when you get angry, you assume it leaves your mouth and dissipates into the universe.

And 10 out of 10 people don't even think about it.

They're just angry.

Well, it doesn't dissipate, dissipate into the universe.

It hangs in your yellow.

It hangs in your energy field and it's not going to clear until you clear it through forgiveness.

So you're literally walking around in a cloud.

You're walking around in a thunder cloud.

And it's very hard to see things when you're walking around in a black cloud, isn't it?

You know, your dream relationship might have just walked by.

Well, you can't see it because you're so focused on the anger.

You're in a cloud.

A new way of making money, a new way of getting healthy.

You missed them all because you're walking around in a cloud.

It's like holding a cup in front of you and saying, well, you know, if this, if this cup represents anger and I'm holding it in front of my face, well, I can't see any, anything coming my way because I'm so focused on myself and the anger.

I'm missing opportunities.

And that's what it is.

So when you, when you're sitting alone in the room and you get that first person, we'll call it Martha.

Because I saved the name Karen's for the number 10, right?

Of course.

And I don't know any Martha's.

So you want to forgive Martha.

So you put your hand in your, on your heart and you say, I completely forgive Martha.

I forgive the energy around Martha.

I completely forgive myself.

I forgive the energy around myself.

I completely forgive the energy around our relationship.

And so it is amen.

End it any way you like.

Now I want you to check in with your body.

You still mad?

No.

Cross the name off, go to the next person on the list.

Are you still mad?

Was it a level three person and you're still mad.

Okay, cross out the three, put a two, wait 24 hours, do it again tomorrow night.

What?

And this happened to a friend of mine.

She was right in front of me.

I was watching her.

She.

I mean, she was literally right in front of me.

And she was a level five person, I think.

And she made that first pass, and she checked in with her body, and she said, I'm furious.

I said, excuse me?

She said, I'm even more angry than I was before.

Shut up.

To a 10.

What happened?

There's a closet in the back of your mind, and it's closed.

And the subconscious mind, it's there.

And there's a movie playing in that closet.

You don't know what's there.

If you knew it was there, you would turn it off, but you don't know it's there.

And forgiveness is an onion.

And you just forgave the first layer.

And your brain went, ooh, Samantha's ready for the closet.

And it unlocks the door.

And it opened up the door and it flooded your brain with memories you didn't even know existed.

Yup.

So you put.

You cross out the three, you put a 10, you put it at the back of the list, and you keep going.

That's the basic behind the system.

I want you to do it before you go to sleep or sometime after dinner with an eyeshadow sleep, because 8 out of 10 people get super tired when they do this work.

Oh, that makes sense.

Super tired.

Yeah.

So do it before bed.

Some people.

I don't know how to politely.

Not how to politely say this.

You might be in the bathroom for a few minutes.

You did not eat a piece of bad fish.

It's your body trying to clear out, purge your system.

Now, why does that happen?

There was a study done in Japan called the Japanese Water Study by a guy named Masumoto.

I think that's his name.

I always get his name wrong.

Oh, Melissa, take note.

I know you'll love this Hasumoto.

And I've re.

I've said it so many times.

It just.

It does.

His name doesn't stick in my head anyways.

If you Google the first pay on the first page.

Japanese water study.

I pro.

It's right there.

There.

What he did is he took two containers of water.

And the first container of water, he just talked to it.

That's all he did.

He spoke beautiful words of love to this water.

The most beautiful things you can say to a human, he said to the water.

The other container of water.

Hate the most horrible Nasty hatred.

Things he could.

You could say to a human, he said to that water.

He then froze the water and he put it under a microscope.

The water he spoke loved.

The pictures are phenomenal.

The water he spoke love to had these gorgeous snowflake kind of transformation.

These crystal formations that are just gorgeous.

The water he spoke hate to had malformations.

They were black and they were nasty and they kind of look sick and diseased.

Why am I telling you this?

Your body is 95% water, give or take.

So when your self talk is bad, when you're holding on to anger, what do you think you're doing to the water cells within your own body?

You're literally making yourself sick from the outside in.

Forgiveness is going to change all of those water cells back into those beautiful crystalline forms.

But the dark cells that they change, they gotta go someplace.

Your body has to purge them.

And your body heals itself when it's sleeping.

So that's why I want people to do this before they.

Before they go to bed.

Never do more than 10 a night.

Okay.

Two things.

One, remind me, are we verbally saying these things or can we say these things in our head when we're doing this?

I usually, if I'm alone in a room, I'm saying it out loud to the room.

Okay.

If somebody walks in or you can't be alone in a room, Go outside and try and find, you know, a tree where nobody's around.

If you have to say them in your head, say them in your head because I'd rather you did that than nothing at all.

But I literally would like you to say them out loud because not only are you talking it, but your brain is going to hear it.

So you're gonna, you're gonna talk it.

And while you're talking, your brain is hearing it, so you're getting it twice.

That makes sense.

That makes sense.

It's really awkward for me to like say things like that, but.

Yeah, but you're alone in a room.

Nobody's there with the plants.

I know, okay.

Second thing.

I know that.

I know that.

Yeah.

What's the point, man?

I know the walls are talking.

Second thing that I heard you say just a second ago was that when you do that negative self talk that you know, what is that doing to inside your body?

So are you associating this giving forgiveness and doing this process as to why we have negative self talk?

Sometimes anger will cause the negative self talk.

When you're a kid and your parents are constantly belittling you and saying you're only good.

You should just get married and have babies because that's all you're good for.

Oh, is that just my father?

Oh, sorry.

No.

But you know, it does something especially to women.

We have this worthy problem.

We don't think we're worthy enough because we've spent many 10, 20, 30, 40 years being told you're not good enough.

Will eventually you think to yourself, well, if everybody says I'm not good enough, I might as well just show them and become that.

So yeah, your self talk is often a symptom of your anger.

And the stuff that is taught, we've been taught, but we've got this.

This forgiveness system is going to get rid of some of those layers and you're going to start with the easy ones and you're going to go up to the hard ones.

Now how do you forgive the unforgivable?

The big question.

Very good question.

We're going to use myself as an example, okay.

Because it's the easiest.

And we're going to use me and my dad.

I didn't want to forgive my father.

Is he alive?

No, he died years ago.

So I'm forgiving a dead person.

Okay, got you.

It sounds very strange to say my relationship with my father is really good today and he's not around.

But I'm also clairaudient and clairvoyant and well, I'm also a medium, so never mind.

That's a rabbit hole we can go down another time.

But dad and I have a good relationship now.

But it took a long time.

This is a marathon.

It is not a sprint.

And when I first started.

This was years ago.

When I first started to forgive him, I didn't even want to forgive him.

And I didn't even want to forgive the energy around the man.

That's how angry I was, was.

So I pulled apart the memory.

You can forgive anything.

I picked a memory like a Thanksgiving.

And I forgave the table we sat at.

I am not kidding.

I forgave the energy around the table.

I forgave the chair that I sat in, the energy around the chair.

I forgave the people were at the table, the energy around the people.

I forgave the house that we were in, the energy around the house.

I forgave the town, I forgave the state.

I forgave the date on the, on the calendar.

Because that's the year I tried to commit suicide.

It was a horrible year.

And I pulled apart the memory, and I forgave the bullies and all the other stuff, but I finally also forgave the year.

So you pick apart the memory, and then you go back in and say, okay, am I.

Am I able to forgive my father?

No.

Okay, that's fine.

No judgment.

But I managed to get it to like a 9.5.

I haven't forgiven dad yet.

I have not forgiven the energy around dad, but I've gotten that 10 down to a 9.5 by pulling apart the memory and forgiving the energy in other parts of the memory.

So I chose another memory and I did it again.

And that's how you get these people.

Eventually, when I got.

When I got it down, when I got the memories down to.

I was able to get it down to a nine.

And then I started forgiving Dad.

I still couldn't forgive my father, but I was able to forgive the energy around my father for a while.

So you understand why this is going to take a long time.

It took me months and months and months to get my number 10 dad.

All the way down to a forgivable 1, 2, or 3 where I could finally toss.

It took a long time.

But you do it by pulling apart the memories.

You can forgive anything.

You can forgive the table, the chair, the bench, the town, the park, the car that took you there, the bar where you are.

You can forgive anything.

It's all forgivable.

That's a lot to digest.

I know.

And sometimes your own name is your number 10.

We all have things we can't forgive.

You know, we've all had sentences that come out of words that have come out of our mouth.

And you.

You.

Once it's out of your mouth, man, you can't get it back.

I mean, it's.

It's gone.

So we all have those people that we want them to forgive us.

So after you go through your first list, I want you to do a second one.

And this list is different.

This list is everybody whom I want to forgive me again.

Your top three are probably going to be the.

The atom bombs of the stuff that you did that, you know, the.

The.

The.

The Cream de La awful.

But I want you to write them all down.

And it could be experiences, it could be a place.

I wish I hadn't left that bar.

I wish I hadn't gotten to that concert.

You can fight Beatles concert.

I mean, you can make your list any way you want.

Then I rate them from 1 to 10.

Start with the ones, work your way up to the tens.

Yeah, and you flip the language a little bit.

Instead of I completely forgive Martha, it would be the language we flipped.

Martha completely forgives me.

And there's three different mantras in my class.

Not in the book, because now I'm teaching you stuff that's in book two.

But it is in the class that I'm launching Wednesday.

And the third list, if you're not completely.

If your brains aren't completely overwhelmed by this point, and they might be, is you could forgive money.

It's just energy and we all have a really wonky relationship with it.

It.

You know, it's like the people who say, I want to win the lottery and I want to be the wealthiest person in the world, but all.

All wealthy people are bad.

Okay?

People, you just cancel out the thought.

You can't say rich people are bad and I want to be rich and expect the universe to dump a bunch of money in your lap.

It's.

You're canceling it out.

Oh, I love that you said that.

Because in my job, I'm about to be a certified RTT therapist.

And one of the things that you teach people is that you're mind does what you tell it.

And the mind does not understand conflicting beliefs.

So you gotta figure that out.

And it's also your.

But you also have a financial set point.

You know, it's how you were raised.

You, maybe you were raised rich, poor, middle class, it doesn't matter.

So your body, let's say you were raised dirt poor, to use an example, because it's a good example.

Okay.

Well, that's your body set point.

The devil you know is better than the devil you don't.

You're used to it.

You know, the fixes, it's.

It's horrible.

You don't want to stay there.

But you're used to it.

Your body's used to it.

So when you start to change and you start to make more money and you start to do new things, your body is like, oh, that's change.

I don't like change.

I don't know what's over there.

So your body's going to bring you back to set.

Yeah.

Meaning the money's going to fall through your fingers and you're going to go back to the set point.

So what do you do?

You forgive it.

You write down all your feelings about money.

You write it.

You forgive your parents and their attitude toward money.

You forgive the house that you grew up in.

You forgive your first apartment.

Oh, mine was at Humdinger.

Nobody.

If you want to have a little War about whose first apartment was the worst.

I win 10 out of 10 times.

We, my roommate and I, this is before I met my husband.

We were.

We didn't have two dimes to scrape together, so my first apartment was over a fish market in New York City.

Oh, no.

And you can imagine how it smelled in the summertime in that New York City heat.

And you probably smelled like that anywhere you went.

Oh, yeah.

Be like, what is that smell?

We spent a lot of time down at my mother's house because, well, we lived above a fish market, so.

And my mom was a really good cook.

In spite of everything, mom knew how to cook.

So I'm seeing.

I'm seeing a pattern here.

You just follow food.

Yeah, right, Right.

But you can put down, you know, your first apartment.

You can put down the fact maybe you went bankrupt, maybe you lost a job, whatever it is, put down all of these things and give all of those memories a name.

You know, you can name it anything you want.

Rate them from 1 to 10, start with the ones, work your way up to the 10.

What's that going to do?

Doing all of this is going to open up your world.

Forgiveness.

Energy is serious, serious science.

It's like the law of gravity, and it's going to work whether you believe it in or not.

And even if you say, I completely forgive this person, you look at me and say, it didn't work.

Oh, honey.

Yeah, it did.

It did work.

But you just got rid of the first layer.

There's probably 20 more layers underneath that.

That.

Yeah.

It's gonna Change your life 100%.

It's interesting because I.

We have said this before, but every guest that we have on the podcast, it's like they're led to us for a reason.

And what we find is that little bits of what every guest says, it just kind of all goes together.

And it's really kind of all the same thing, but in a different way, and it's the same belief.

And so it's really fascinating to hear this because we do have someone who talks about this, the money.

The money monster.

And that sounds exactly like what you're doing as well.

And then a lot of what you're saying is what I do in my job, and it's working with, honestly, your subconscious, because that's where all of these things are locked that you don't realize are locked.

Our brains operate off of only 10, 10, 5%.

5% of our brain is our conscious brain, 95 of it is subconscious.

So that's why we're Peeling back these onions and it's taking so long.

Well, you need to chip away at it, you know, and everything can.

Anything is forgivable.

You know, maybe you're.

Maybe in the super bowl, your team lost.

You could forgive the team if that's causing you anger.

If you're watching CNN or the news and it makes you angry, you can forgive politicians, you can forgive the news, you can forgive all this stuff.

What's it gonna.

You can forgive the war in the Middle East.

What's it gonna do for the war in the Middle East?

Absolutely nothing.

But it's going to do wonders for you.

This is.

And let me tell you a story that might stretch people's brains to the point of pain, but I'm going to do it anyway.

Oh, good.

I forgave.

I am my own guinea pig, and I forgave a level one person.

She was a friend that I went to school with, you know, like three, four decades ago.

That's how old I am.

And I hadn't seen or heard from this person in all those years.

And I couldn't.

We were really tight in school, and I couldn't remember what we were angry about.

So easy peasy, right?

So I sat down and I forgave her on a dime.

Didn't need to talk to her, didn't need to do any of that.

I just sat down, said the mantra, and I knew I'd completely forgiven her.

It was the easiest thing in the world.

Two hours.

This is a true story.

Two hours later, she calls me up on the phone, and I hadn't heard from her in decades.

And it's a good thing that I'm retired now, But I used to chain four or five star customer service and concierge around the world.

I'm a concierge trainer, and thank God I was, because my concierge, my concierge Persona kicked in virtually immediately.

And I masked my shock because my jaw dropped to the floor.

Couldn't believe after all these decades, she called me on that day.

So we said all the right things, we made all the right noises.

We did what people do when they're forgiving and reminiscing, but I couldn't stand it.

And I said, I have to know, after all these decades, why did you decide to call me today of all days?

She said, you know, it's the damnedest thing.

A figurine you gave me back in school flew off my shelf, landed in the middle of my floor.

I saw it and thought maybe I should give her a call.

And when it flew off that shelf.

That was two hours prior.

That was exactly when I was saying the forgiveness mantra and forgiving her.

So a forgiveness energy has the power to move a figurine 700 miles away.

Can you imagine what it's going to do to your life and your body?

Yeah, yeah.

In my RTT practices, I've also seen it where it's like, you don't realize that there's a hurter that's caused, you know, some sort of negative belief.

And then as you have this dialogue with them, just like you're saying where you're, you know, talking to that herder of like, this is what you did, this is what it did to me, that there's been evidence and people who.

Then those people, those herders have reached out to them and, like, the relationship has completely changed.

And it does.

It will.

It will Change your relationships 100%.

It will, it's going to.

And it works.

Whether you believe it or not.

Forgiveness energy is, is, is, is stunning now because they do my own exercises.

When I did this exercise, because I did this exercise, I am, I am an overachiever.

I am a serial entrepreneur.

I've written 16 books.

So, yeah, I wrote a list and my list must have had 50 people.

I'm not kidding.

And I thought, this is going to be great.

I'm going to be like a phoenix rising from the ashes.

I'm going to be like a butterfly flying out of the cocoon.

I'm going to wake up tomorrow morning and all these people are going to be forgiven and I'm going to be a new person.

No, the universe does not work that way.

I actually did forgive many people on the list.

I also ended up in bed for the next three days, which everybody thought was a stomach flu.

It was not the stomach flu.

It is what I call energy sickness.

And my body, there was too much energy to get rid of.

Even with me sleeping, I had overdone it and my body literally had to purge and it had.

It had to put me in bed for three days so it could get rid of all that dark energy.

And it's called, I call it energy sickness.

So when you're doing this, practice, do it before bed because your body heals itself when it's sleeping.

We all know this.

That makes sense.

I never want you to do more than five to 10 a night.

If they're a live.

If they're a level one to seven, you can easily do five a night, no problem.

If you're doing a level eight, nine or ten person, one A night.

One a night.

Because I don't want you to end up in bed with energy sickness.

And this is why it's a marathon, not a sprint.

But here's what's going to happen for giving the easy ones.

You're going to start to feel better.

Coffee is going to taste better.

You're going to notice things.

You're going to notice opportunities.

And how do you know you've completely forgiven them when you don't care?

And I'm not kidding.

I had an ex business.

I've had a lot of business partners, but one in particular I was completely mad at.

And every time I saw her name, you'd have to peel me off the ceiling.

You know the kind of person is I met and I remembered everything.

And I'd sit here and I'd stew and I did all the work and I got this woman down and I completely forgave her.

Took me a few weeks, but I did it.

And it was her birthday and I saw her name on Facebook or Instagram or whatever I was on, and I didn't care.

I'm so glad you said that.

We all have that myself.

And I sat here and I thought, wait a minute.

I don't care.

I didn't call her a.

In my head.

Exactly.

Exactly.

I didn't care.

I didn't care.

Good, I didn't care bad, I didn't care.

I had immediately thought.

I neutralized her.

I don't care.

That's joy, that's peace.

That's freedom.

You don't care.

And now I can concentrate on anything.

On other things.

That's what you're looking for.

You're looking for neutrality.

Now there's another saying out there that everybody.

Oh, you can forgive and forget.

I'm originally from New York City, and I can guarantee you that.

And I can speak for everybody in New York right now.

We never forget.

Not going to happen.

None of us will forget you.

Just not going to happen.

That's New Jersey, too.

For anybody who's from New Jersey listening.

Yeah, we don't forget.

What it will do is it's you're going to remember different things.

I can look back at my childhood now, and instead of picking out the horrible things that happened to me, I actually remember the people that were trying to help that kid.

I remember the dog.

And I remember I loved the dog.

And I remembered all of those other things.

The teacher that gave me a helping hand, the friends that I had.

I have positive, loving memories now that have replaced the negative ones.

I haven't Forgotten what happened, but I don't remember it as much.

It's been replaced by love.

My perspective has changed.

That's what forgiveness will do for you.

Yeah.

And.

And you're right.

No one really tells you how, so this is super helpful and.

Well, that's stupid.

They say you need to forgive.

Okay.

Why?

How?

What if I don't want to?

Nobody does bring that down.

It's energy.

And then they give you this.

Oh, yeah, they give you this metaphysical mumbo jumbo.

And I could keep up with the metaphysical as much as anybody else, but it's.

It's still not helpful.

And don't give me Bible verses that I can't understand because they're all parables and I don't get it.

Don't quote them at me because now I got to figure out a poem.

That'S not helpful either.

I need a tell me step one, step two, step three.

Don't just throw words at me.

Well, you'll feel better.

Well, I know that, but how do I get there?

I mean, how do I get there?

This is.

This.

This system will help you get there.

And being.

Be kind to yourself.

If you could never give to the people you label at 8, 9, or 10, that's fine.

Forgive yourself, forgive the event and keep going.

Forgive what you can and keep going.

If you never.

If you only can forgive the people you label between a one and a seven, I'm fine with that.

Forgive what you can and keep going.

If you could circle back later and forgive these people, there's some unit.

You and I both know there are some unicorn people on this planet that can forgive them this stuff and not even.

Not even blink.