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Dope Sh*t These Therapists Say
Episode 815th April 2021 • Healing in Hindsight® • Taylor Daniele™
00:00:00 01:05:56

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If you can't tell already, mental health is a huge topic on the show.

KEY POINTS

  • Stress management and why it's important
  • Working with clients with chronic conditions
  • How mental health directly affects the body
  • Dope Sh*t Therapy Pod and plans for the future

Find more at www.healinginhindsight.com

Connect with Lauren and Ryanne

Listen to their show: Dope Sh*t My Therapist Says

Instagram @dopeshttherapypod

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Healing in Hindsight™ is managed by host Taylor Daniele™ and Produced by We Are 8 Studios



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Transcripts

Taylor:

How are y'all doing today?

Lauren:

I'm doing fine.

Lauren:

How are you?

Taylor:

I am glad that it is Friday.

Taylor:

It is what Easter weekend.

Taylor:

I keep forgetting because people keep saying happy Easter and I'm like, Oh yeah.

Taylor:

Because of just the whole traditional aspect of it, I don't really celebrate it.

Taylor:

But I have two friends who are Easter babies.

Taylor:

One her birthday is today and then my other best friend is on Monday.

Taylor:

So I, I remember that.

Taylor:

I don't remember the Easter thing, but it's, it's nice.

Taylor:

The weather is nice here in Austin.

Taylor:

It's not too hot, not too cold, especially after that wonderful

Taylor:

freeze that way, couple of weeks ago.

Taylor:

But it's, it's good.

Taylor:

It's good.

Taylor:

I'm really excited to have you guys both on the show.

Taylor:

I have been watching you guys for a minute.

Taylor:

I know we met in mutual, podcasting circles, but I've been really enjoying the

Taylor:

content that y'all have been pulling out.

Taylor:

And so of course after the title itself, I was like, I need y'all on the show

Taylor:

because mental health is definitely a huge part of living with a chronic illness.

Taylor:

And so, Lauren and Ryan, thank you for sharing your time and energy as

Taylor:

we go into this, but something that I would like to do is just for those

Taylor:

who don't know you guys, if you could each introduce yourself and then I need

Taylor:

y'all to tell the story of how y'all met and how you started the show, because

Taylor:

we're in three different time zones.

Taylor:

Y'all were really in three different times though, as we're recording this.

Taylor:

And I'm just so glad we were able to coordinate this really well.

Taylor:

I'm central one specific ones Eastern.

Taylor:

So you know, all across the map.

Taylor:

It's really cool.

Taylor:

So I got to know how you guys have been making this work.

Taylor:

So yeah.

Lauren:

You want to go first?

Lauren:

Learn.

Taylor:

wants to go.

Lauren:

Got clear my throat.

Lauren:

Well, my name is Lauren.

Lauren:

I live in Los Angeles, California, born and raised in the San Fernando

Lauren:

Valley, which is right by LA.

Lauren:

If you've been in LA the area then my family moved out a little bit.

Lauren:

About 45 minutes North when I was like nine years old I

Lauren:

always loved helping people.

Lauren:

That was something I knew I wanted to do as a young girl, just didn't

Lauren:

really know what that meant.

Lauren:

I had a lot of experience working with children and then I moved to Arizona.

Lauren:

I went to Arizona state for undergrad and studied psychology.

Lauren:

And then I taught preschool for a year trying to figure

Lauren:

out what I wanted to do next.

Lauren:

And I moved back to California.

Lauren:

And then that was when I entered my grad program, which was where I met Ryan and

Lauren:

we studied master's in counseling with an emphasis in marriage and family therapy.

Lauren:

And that's kind of where my story with

Taylor:

Ryan

Ryanne:

starts.

Ryanne:

And I'm Ryan.

Ryanne:

I now live in Connecticut, but I was born and raised in California.

Ryanne:

The desert areas where nobody knows we exist.

Ryanne:

And I went to Cal state channel islands out on the coast to get my

Ryanne:

bachelor's degree in psychology.

Ryanne:

And I also minor, minor in communications and I went straight

Ryanne:

into my master's program, which is also where I met Lauren and am now a

Ryanne:

licensed marriage and family therapist practicing out here in Connecticut.

Ryanne:

And I moved to Connecticut just because I wanted a life change.

Ryanne:

I am somewhat of a like wild nomad at heart and I've always been caged in.

Ryanne:

So I finally just decided to make the random move, which

Ryanne:

people are like, why Connecticut?

Ryanne:

And I'm like, there's some, there's something for everyone,

Lauren:

I guess.

Lauren:

Yeah.

Lauren:

And I remember when I met Ryan we kind of started off on a weird foot.

Lauren:

I do remember her saying she wanted to move to new England and

Lauren:

I was like, that's interesting.

Lauren:

And then in our second semester of our first year, I was like,

Lauren:

no, we have a lot in common.

Lauren:

This girl is really cool.

Lauren:

And because she lived right by where my parents lived, it was so easy for us

Lauren:

to establish a relationship as friends.

Lauren:

And then we became travel buddies at venture buddies, concert buddies.

Lauren:

We've done everything together.

Lauren:

And then she moved and it was really hard, but we kept in touch.

Lauren:

And then July is when we launched our podcast and we've

Lauren:

been doing it ever since.

Lauren:

Yeah, the

Ryanne:

podcast actually was an idea that I had once I moved here, it's kind of

Ryanne:

weird just in the realms of mental health.

Ryanne:

My mental health changed completely.

Ryanne:

Once I left California for the better it was like a closed door and my

Ryanne:

brain had opened up and everything that I was good at as a child or had

Ryanne:

at the core of me just became easier.

Ryanne:

So I had all these creative ideas flooding me.

Ryanne:

I'd always wanted to do something creative again, but just never knew what it was.

Ryanne:

And so I remember texting Lauren probably within the first couple of months of

Ryanne:

me living out here in Connecticut and saying like, I think we should start a

Ryanne:

podcast about mental health, about being a therapist, something along this line.

Ryanne:

And now, three years later, basically we finally

Lauren:

needed a reality.

Taylor:

Yeah.

Taylor:

Yeah.

Taylor:

I think we, we actually started about the same time you guys

Taylor:

were in July and I was in August.

Taylor:

And of course COVID made things a lot easier.

Taylor:

Right.

Taylor:

And remote life has, has given us a whole new meaning of connection, but

Taylor:

it's really cool that you guys, had this deep relationship beforehand.

Taylor:

And Lauren, I totally feel you on like that separation is hard.

Taylor:

One of my best friends from college, she moved to, she first moved to

Taylor:

Houston to do her law program.

Taylor:

And that was a little bit easier cause like two and a half hours from here.

Taylor:

And then she moved to Philadelphia to actually do her practice and

Taylor:

work and do what she wants to do.

Taylor:

And that was really hard because, we have this trio and so she and I are still here.

Taylor:

And then our third is in Philadelphia and we're just like, life is

Taylor:

weird because you're not here.

Taylor:

And I'm used to seeing you guys every weekend and now I don't.

Taylor:

So I, I truly commend you guys for being able to have such a deep relationship and,

Taylor:

build something together that surrounds both of your passions on how you met.

Taylor:

So that's, that's really cool.

Taylor:

So my next question for both of you guys is, so you did your,

Taylor:

your grad programs together.

Taylor:

Why therapy?

Taylor:

Why was that the idea that, especially family and marriages, that's,

Taylor:

very particular around to go in.

Taylor:

So what inspired each of you to decide?

Taylor:

I want to be a therapist and I want to help people.

Lauren:

Go first.

Lauren:

Okay.

Lauren:

I guess I'll

Ryanne:

go first.

Taylor:

Flipping a coin.

Taylor:

I choose

Lauren:

okay.

Ryanne:

Normally we don't have this problem.

Ryanne:

Normally we're very like on, we haven't recorded in a while.

Ryanne:

I feel like that's why I'm.

Ryanne:

So I actually wanted to go into a completely different field.

Ryanne:

I went into college, wanting to be in public relations, wanted

Ryanne:

to be in a creative outlet.

Ryanne:

And couldn't get any of my classes.

Ryanne:

Like they were all full all the time.

Ryanne:

And so I was like, I'm not just going to sit here.

Ryanne:

I need to be doing something.

Ryanne:

So I started taking psychology classes and I finished all of my psychology classes.

Ryanne:

By the time my communication classes started opening up, which is why I have

Ryanne:

a minor in communications, because I was like, no, I'm not staying here any longer.

Ryanne:

I'm done.

Ryanne:

And then I don't know.

Ryanne:

I just ended up going to my master's program.

Ryanne:

My mom is a marriage and family therapist, so I grew up around

Ryanne:

psychology and therapy in my household.

Ryanne:

So I guess it was just kind of ingrained in me that way.

Ryanne:

I've always been a listener, a helper.

Ryanne:

That's just kinda my personality.

Ryanne:

If you take the personality test, all of mine, come back as the

Ryanne:

helper and I'm just like, okay, can we get something new in here?

Ryanne:

But to kind of like clarify for most people, the common misconception is

Ryanne:

that marriage and family therapy are counselors for couples and families.

Ryanne:

And that's actually not necessarily true.

Ryanne:

I, it's just kind of the title.

Ryanne:

We have a broad range of training in things that are clinical.

Ryanne:

So mental health and our degree helps us look at behavior from a systemic

Ryanne:

standpoint, meaning like your family is the system that you grow up in.

Ryanne:

And that just impacts everything, how we see the world and

Ryanne:

how we act and all of that.

Ryanne:

So, a lot of people are like, Oh, you do a couples counseling.

Ryanne:

I'm like, no, neither of us do couples counseling.

Ryanne:

Actually.

Ryanne:

It's just the way that our degree

Lauren:

is called.

Lauren:

Yeah.

Lauren:

all right.

Lauren:

And then for me, it's funny because when I was like 13, 12, 13, I was

Lauren:

always reading those like teen fiction nonfiction novels about.

Lauren:

Eating disorders and just other like mental health issues and, looking

Lauren:

back, it's like, well, it makes sense.

Lauren:

I wanted to be in a helping field.

Lauren:

But it's really, I think the reason I wanted to be a therapist

Lauren:

was because when I was in middle school, I was bullied and it really

Lauren:

impacted how I felt during that time.

Lauren:

And the only way I got through it was because my family was so

Lauren:

in-tune to how I was feeling.

Lauren:

And currently I'm, I'm almost done with my job.

Lauren:

It's coming to an end for me, as I entered the licensure process

Lauren:

of actually getting my license and being licensed in California I've

Lauren:

been working at a high school.

Lauren:

So working with teens has been extremely rewarding.

Lauren:

So I think that I just wanted to figure out, I think for awhile I

Lauren:

wanted to be a child psychologist because the title sound good.

Lauren:

And then I found the MFT program and just like Ryan said, I mean,

Lauren:

it's not, it is just a title.

Lauren:

A lot of the us works on social work.

Lauren:

Like that's like the main therapy and other States that

Lauren:

are not really California.

Lauren:

So California has psychologists, social workers.

Lauren:

And to me, I just thought my grandma, who I never met, who

Lauren:

passed away when my dad was a child, was a social worker in New York.

Lauren:

And I knew what she did.

Lauren:

And I was like, I don't want to do that.

Lauren:

So what else can I do now?

Lauren:

I realize where we're all kind of the same, a little bit different depending

Lauren:

on the state and the job itself.

Lauren:

But I, and also the grad school that we went to was where I was

Lauren:

born and raised for half my life.

Lauren:

So I was like, Hmm, it's meant to be.

Lauren:

It works

Taylor:

out.

Taylor:

So

Ryanne:

yeah,

Taylor:

That's really cool.

Taylor:

And definitely Ryan, thank you for, for clarifying the title

Taylor:

thing, because I'm guilty.

Taylor:

I'm like, okay, it's family issues, it's marriage issues.

Taylor:

And you know that that's, that's already a deep, well in itself, let alone what

Taylor:

you know, possible individual stuff is.

Taylor:

But it's, it's nice to know, for those listening that it means you can cover

Taylor:

a lot of things and it's the titling is more so the root of where some

Taylor:

of those individual issues come up.

Taylor:

So that's really cool.

Taylor:

For my own therapist, she's got.

Taylor:

50 million tags on our aunties and supervisor.

Taylor:

So I'm like, I'm just going to assume that means, all the things and

Taylor:

I'm in the right place, because it can be a little bit confusing when

Taylor:

you're, especially seeking help.

Taylor:

And you're trying to understand what does that mean that you specialize in?

Taylor:

So thank you for that clarity.

Taylor:

That's really cool, which leads me.

Taylor:

And Lauren, I'll start with you on this one is what is one misconception

Taylor:

about therapy that you want to correct?

Taylor:

So we've got the title thing, but as you go into therapy or someone's

Taylor:

seeking it out for the first time, I'd love to hear from both of you.

Taylor:

What's one myth or thing that you're just like, Hey, stop the madness.

Taylor:

This is not true.

Taylor:

If you come into a therapy space, this is actually what happened.

Lauren:

So there's probably more than one, but I will say the one that comes

Lauren:

to mind is that you need to be in a mental health crisis to get therapy.

Lauren:

When in reality, mental health should be looked at from a preventative

Lauren:

perspective, which is another reason why I wanted to go into therapy was I

Lauren:

wanted it to be preventative because so many things in our life are like, well,

Lauren:

we're in it now, how do we get out?

Lauren:

And that also relates to physical health as well.

Lauren:

Like, if you see something on your body, Go to the doctor now, not

Lauren:

in three weeks when it's infected.

Lauren:

So I think about that in a mental health way.

Lauren:

That for me, it's like, if you're not feeling okay or supported or

Lauren:

mentally, well go find a therapist now, because you can always end

Lauren:

therapy, you can always leave.

Lauren:

You can always find someone new.

Lauren:

You can have a short term thing.

Lauren:

It could be six months.

Lauren:

And you're like, you know what?

Lauren:

I feel better.

Lauren:

We worked through the challenge that brought me here, or it could

Lauren:

be long-term, but it doesn't need to be something that like, Oh wow.

Lauren:

I'm in a deep depression.

Lauren:

I've been like this for years now.

Lauren:

I need therapy.

Lauren:

It's like, no, you need therapy before.

Lauren:

So that's probably what I would say.

Taylor:

Ooh, that's a good one.

Taylor:

All right, Ryan, what about you?

Lauren:

I think mine would probably be

Ryanne:

that I've noticed a lot of clients come into therapy, thinking that there

Ryanne:

are these tools that were word gets used a lot that I'm magically going to

Ryanne:

give them that will make things better.

Ryanne:

Like I just hand them a magic wand and then all of a sudden, like they, they use

Ryanne:

that wand when they need to, and it works.

Ryanne:

And although we do utilize tools in therapy, they're kind of a little bit

Ryanne:

more covert than people will think when they come into therapy, they can

Ryanne:

be something so small, like us just talking about something and then them

Ryanne:

building insight on being able to think about those things or I was using

Ryanne:

mindfulness or journaling or breath work.

Ryanne:

Those are all skills and tools and they don't always work.

Ryanne:

So I think that's a big misconception is that you're going

Ryanne:

to learn how to cope with things.

Ryanne:

In therapy and it's always going to work like it's going to be your toolbox.

Ryanne:

That always works.

Ryanne:

And so, I kind of remind clients there's times where you just have to utilize time

Ryanne:

as a coping skill or talking, or just having a space to vent is a big tool.

Ryanne:

And that people don't even think about, they're like, well, we're just

Ryanne:

talking, Y this is this isn't doing anything like, well, you're, you're

Ryanne:

really learning about yourself by being able to vocalize these things.

Ryanne:

So I think that's a big one.

Ryanne:

We're not going to just hand you these magic wands that

Ryanne:

are going to fix everything.

Lauren:

You have to do the work.

Taylor:

Yeah.

Taylor:

Yeah.

Taylor:

And I think that's something so huge in our culture that I feel like

Taylor:

we're finally coming around to, in that nothing is going to be instant.

Taylor:

I, I, I think we're all around the same age.

Taylor:

So we grew up in the microwave generation is that you'll have to call us.

Taylor:

Right.

Taylor:

So everything is instant.

Taylor:

Everything is, it should be fixed right now.

Taylor:

And, no matter what it is, whether it is your mental health, your physical health,

Taylor:

your spiritual health, it takes time.

Taylor:

I don't wake up the next day and suddenly like, Oh, my blood sugars

Taylor:

are just absolutely perfect.

Taylor:

No, I had to work at this shit and it's still a daily grind.

Taylor:

Right.

Taylor:

And so, I, I appreciate that, Listen to the therapist, y'all it takes time.

Taylor:

It's not something that's going to happen overnight.

Taylor:

And that's something that I had to get over it.

Taylor:

Cause I did not want to go back to therapy.

Taylor:

I had a weird experience when I was a kid with my parents.

Taylor:

But thanks to my partner pushing me.

Taylor:

I didn't even realize, like I like to share anyways, I'm an

Taylor:

overshare, but when I got into that container, it just fell out of me.

Taylor:

Like everything just fell out of me and it was just like, that's all I

Taylor:

needed half the time was someone who wasn't emotionally attached to me

Taylor:

to sit back and just hear me out.

Taylor:

And I'm like, yeah, I can do this every week.

Taylor:

And so, I think that's very beautiful to understand that it is not going

Taylor:

to be an instant, in one session it is something that you need to

Taylor:

work at and be willing to work at.

Taylor:

Cause if you're looking for a magic wand, we all want to be in Harry Potter world.

Lauren:

Oh, yeah.

Taylor:

ain't happening.

Taylor:

So I would love to dive into a couple of things that, I feel are

Taylor:

not only huge, just in general, but especially for the diabetic community.

Taylor:

Something that always plays a role in, how our illness progresses is stress.

Taylor:

So, I don't know if y'all heard it going off.

Taylor:

So I have my CDM right here to check in on where my blood sugar levels are at.

Taylor:

Right.

Taylor:

And so something that affects blood sugar levels is stress.

Taylor:

And it's not something that we can, 100% control.

Taylor:

But a lot of times when you're diagnosed people, don't tell you, Hey, stress

Taylor:

might make your numbers go crazy.

Taylor:

Working out in certain ways might make your numbers go crazy.

Taylor:

Ladies.

Taylor:

Time of the month, it's going to make your numbers go crazy, being sick.

Taylor:

Nobody really breaks that down.

Taylor:

And so I would love to one hear from each of you, why stress management is

Taylor:

important and how does it take a toll if it goes unchecked, for us, we get,

Taylor:

if it goes on, check your numbers are going crazy, but I think there's a

Taylor:

deeper thing that can happen if you don't take care of your stress management.

Taylor:

So, Ryan, we'll start with you on

Ryanne:

Okay.

Ryanne:

So I talked to my students about this a lot because I've been

Ryanne:

hearing from a lot of people.

Ryanne:

I also work at a high school out there.

Ryanne:

I said that that they're just really struggling to focus.

Ryanne:

They're really struggling with memory and all of these things.

Ryanne:

And this is something I actually learned when we were in our master's program,

Ryanne:

because it happened to me is that if your stress level gets out of control

Ryanne:

your frontal lobe, the front of your head, where your forehead is, where.

Ryanne:

All of your decision-making focus, et cetera, comes from

Ryanne:

we'll pretty much shut off.

Ryanne:

It's like done.

Ryanne:

It's like, I'm tired.

Ryanne:

I'm not, I'm not working anymore.

Ryanne:

And that's a big thing, cause then you're more stressed out.

Ryanne:

Like why can't I remember what I just was supposed to be doing?

Ryanne:

Why can't I focus on this or that?

Ryanne:

So stress can have a huge biological impact on us.

Ryanne:

Like you're saying tailor for your blood sugar levels and for other people they're

Ryanne:

getting stomach aches and migraines and I mean, stress can even give you

Ryanne:

a heart attack if it goes on check.

Ryanne:

So the mind body connection is so intense that we really have to learn

Ryanne:

how to recognize when we're getting to that place and really find ways to, to

Ryanne:

stop it and make conscious decisions

Lauren:

to make changes for ourselves.

Taylor:

Wow.

Taylor:

Wow.

Taylor:

What's your take

Lauren:

Well, I agree, first of all.

Lauren:

But also I feel like a lot of people are just not honest about where they are.

Lauren:

The stress is coming from.

Lauren:

I'm one of those people because full disclosure.

Lauren:

So I have a migraine today.

Lauren:

It's because I had a really stressful week and I know exactly

Lauren:

why I I'm just dealing with some personal stuff, some career stuff.

Lauren:

And I feel like it's really important that people are honest about where their stress

Lauren:

is coming from and being able to confide in somebody as a release, whether that

Lauren:

is your therapist who can help you work through some of those issues or, a partner

Lauren:

or close friend, whoever it may be.

Lauren:

Because the body really does pick up on the stress and from

Lauren:

a mental health perspective.

Lauren:

I mean, there's certain things that I talk about also with my students

Lauren:

that are not, anxiety, depression, it's fatigue, and also digestion,

Lauren:

like Ryan said sleep issues.

Lauren:

Insomnia is, be due to stress.

Lauren:

So when I'm hearing, I'm not sleeping well, and there's a lot of

Lauren:

my mind, I mean, that it's stress.

Lauren:

So finding out the cause of it and then addressing it.

Taylor:

Wow.

Taylor:

Wow.

Taylor:

So first Lauren, thank you for being vulnerable.

Taylor:

I know that this is kind of your space on a regular basis, but I

Taylor:

think people often forget that the people helping others also need space

Taylor:

to be vulnerable and to release.

Taylor:

So thank you for being open with us.

Taylor:

And I hope the migraine gets a little bit better for you.

Taylor:

Because like you guys said, everybody needs to recognize it, acknowledges

Taylor:

stress, everybody needs release.

Taylor:

And I'm also guilty of not recognizing when I'm stressed the hell out.

Taylor:

It, it literally crept up on me in season two.

Taylor:

I actually had to take a step back from the show for like two weeks

Taylor:

because I translate doing things by.

Taylor:

Keep myself busy.

Taylor:

If I'm stressed out.

Taylor:

If I keep myself busy, if I, if I'm constantly working on something,

Taylor:

I love projects anyways, then I will have to acknowledge that

Taylor:

something is freaking me out.

Taylor:

Right.

Taylor:

I'll just deal with it later.

Taylor:

When I get all this stuff done, this is more important.

Taylor:

And my body literally shut down was just like, you are not going to have the energy

Taylor:

to move at all until you address this.

Taylor:

So either address it or you just going to be laid out in

Taylor:

the bed for a week straight.

Taylor:

And so, it is definitely important to check into that.

Taylor:

Especially for those with chronic illnesses, it can cause way more harm.

Taylor:

If you don't.

Taylor:

So speaking of clients with chronic conditions Have either of you worked

Taylor:

with students or other people who have a chronic condition like diabetes

Taylor:

or some other auto-immune disease.

Taylor:

And if you have, what's been the most challenging about it.

Taylor:

And what are some tips that you would give somebody like myself or any others who

Taylor:

not only have this condition, but they're trying to get their mental health in check

Taylor:

as well in ways that they can balance that stress management to keep the symptoms

Taylor:

and things from kind of flaring up.

Taylor:

And Lauren,

Lauren:

okay.

Lauren:

So I have a student who's newly diagnosed type one diabetic, and

Lauren:

they're having a really hard time.

Lauren:

So hard of a time that literally yesterday I got an email from the

Lauren:

nurse at school talking about this is a really big issue now without going

Lauren:

into details my student hasn't been super vocal about it and because it's

Lauren:

something I'm not super familiar with.

Lauren:

I'm not pushing it.

Lauren:

I'm not pushing for them to talk about it, but I'm aware of it.

Lauren:

And I know from, from, Taylor, from other people out there who live with

Lauren:

a chronic condition, that it, I mean, it's, it's a very debilitating thing and

Lauren:

it's, it's hard, but also working with chronic conditions, depending on the

Lauren:

chronic conditions is hard as a therapist when I don't know what it's like.

Lauren:

So all I can do is empathize, which it's true for a lot of things, but I feel

Lauren:

like that's a great time for them to be in a support group or have a therapist

Lauren:

who is capable, dealing with someone.

Lauren:

I know there's a lot of support groups for people who have cancer or

Lauren:

family members who someone has cancer.

Lauren:

So they have a lot of those types of support groups,

Lauren:

which are really important.

Lauren:

But I, it's hard to say as far as working with chronic conditions

Lauren:

because I'm very new to it with my one student And mental health.

Lauren:

I mean, we've worked with a bunch of different students who

Lauren:

are dealing with having mental health issues, chronic conditions.

Lauren:

All I could say is I work with my dad who has Crohn's disease.

Lauren:

So he's kind of like my model for working with someone with a chronic condition

Lauren:

and seeing how their life is disrupted.

Lauren:

It's really, really hard.

Lauren:

I definitely have a lot of empathy, a lot

Taylor:

of

Ryanne:

empathy.

Taylor:

yeah, yeah.

Taylor:

I will say for, someone who's newly diagnosed I get them

Taylor:

not wanting to talk about it.

Taylor:

I think as long as you keep that door open for them, that's the

Taylor:

biggest part, especially, type one to usually diagnosis kids.

Taylor:

And so half the time what's going through their minds is my entire life is over.

Taylor:

Everything that I wanted to do.

Taylor:

Anything that I wanted to pursue is over, because this thing will hold me back.

Taylor:

And it's kind of those subtle reminders that it won't, there are plenty of people

Taylor:

who are thriving as type one diabetics and yes, they have to give themselves insulin.

Taylor:

Yes.

Taylor:

They might need to use gadgets like CGMs or insulin pumps, but it is

Taylor:

no different than any other person.

Taylor:

You just have a little bit more, care that you have to take for yourself.

Taylor:

So if there's any, anything that I can do to help you, it is just keep

Taylor:

the door open for them to recognize that it's okay to be afraid.

Taylor:

And it's okay because it, it sucks.

Taylor:

None of us asked for this, but you can make it and it will be okay.

Taylor:

And there's plenty of, great examples everywhere of people doing just that.

Taylor:

So, thank you for holding space for them because it's going to be rough.

Taylor:

But they will eventually get to a space for that.

Taylor:

So those 2 cents Ryan, I would love your take.

Ryanne:

Lauren actually reminded me.

Ryanne:

I do have a student also that is diagnosed with type one diabetes.

Ryanne:

And he is often in the nurse's office, not feeling well.

Ryanne:

I don't see him as often, so I don't really have as much time

Ryanne:

with him to, to work with it.

Ryanne:

But I, I, I do have quite a few friends that have chronic

Ryanne:

illnesses in front of lupus.

Ryanne:

I have a friend also with type one diabetes, and I guess I would say,

Ryanne:

like my only thing that I think I would probably utilize if I had a

Ryanne:

client coming to me would be probably mindfulness and meditation, trying

Ryanne:

to bring down those stress levels, getting in control of breath.

Ryanne:

And because of that mind, body connection, really trying to put those together.

Ryanne:

And then I think too, depending on what it is, if, if a client was coming to me

Ryanne:

for that specifically for support, I might say, let's find someone together that

Ryanne:

would probably have more of a scope of practice around this, that you would feel

Ryanne:

more supported by because I can listen.

Ryanne:

And you know what I'm saying, offer empathy and have that space for you.

Ryanne:

But you know, it might be better for someone else that has a

Ryanne:

specialty in that to work with you.

Ryanne:

So that ends of work groups like Lauren was saying, I think are probably all good.

Ryanne:

Good choices.

Ryanne:

Having a social group that gets, it probably makes

Lauren:

the biggest difference.

Lauren:

I would assume.

Taylor:

Yeah.

Taylor:

Yeah.

Taylor:

And I've, I've had other guests who are type ones.

Taylor:

And one of their biggest piece of advice is just find the community

Taylor:

find your people, find, locally and across nationally, if you will.

Taylor:

It is a very strong community.

Taylor:

And it is a community that even like, if you run out of supplies, someone

Taylor:

will come through for you, and so, I'm glad that you guys are, are being

Taylor:

so forthright and saying, Hey, let's find someone to, together to be able

Taylor:

to give that perspective because it's not easy and especially working

Taylor:

with kids it can be, it can be a lot.

Taylor:

I will, I will plug a friend for you guys.

Taylor:

Her name is Simone.

Taylor:

She's actually on the show as well coming out pretty soon, but

Taylor:

she's not only a pediatric nurse, but also a type one diabetic.

Taylor:

Her handle is diabetes Bay.

Taylor:

And I think she'd be a great resource for you guys to just kind of pick

Taylor:

her brain on, growing up, she was diagnosed as a teenager and went

Taylor:

into nursing, specifically for that.

Taylor:

So she had worked through plenty of children's top hospitals and has

Taylor:

spoken to, parents that have come in.

Taylor:

They're like, Hey, look, she's a nurse and she's a type one.

Taylor:

Like she gets it, so, at the Linda, any more resources to help you

Lauren:

Oh, yeah, please.

Lauren:

But yeah, there's nothing like finding someone who's been

Lauren:

through what you're going through.

Lauren:

I mean, that's the human connection.

Lauren:

So I'm just echoing, with anyone who has a chronic condition is.

Lauren:

Finding that support group.

Lauren:

And we're so lucky that we have social media in that sense to find groups that

Lauren:

are more tangible and ready at access.

Lauren:

I've seen them on Facebook and other platforms, but it's really nice to

Lauren:

have that community to, to, to say, you've been through something like me

Lauren:

and look at you or especially older adults, because, we work with teenagers.

Lauren:

So, my students 14 and, they're just like, they weren't taking

Lauren:

great care of their health.

Lauren:

And then this happened and they were in the hospital and

Lauren:

I was so worried about them.

Lauren:

And then I found out this happened and I was like, wow.

Lauren:

Like I saw the signs, but I didn't know, cause I'm not a doctor, but I

Lauren:

saw the stress I saw and, there could be anything that contributes to a

Lauren:

chronic illness, but I, it makes sense.

Lauren:

Based on how they've been feeling this year.

Lauren:

And then plus, COVID in general, it's just a really hard time, but yes, appreciate

Lauren:

resources and, and your voice too.

Taylor:

Which is great.

Taylor:

yeah.

Taylor:

Yeah, no happy to help.

Taylor:

We we get it.

Taylor:

And even though I was diagnosed the 25, I.

Taylor:

I cannot imagine, had I been diagnosed at 14 or, a seven or,

Taylor:

whatever, because it changes everything, from your relationships

Taylor:

to how you navigate to, okay.

Taylor:

If I live by myself, what happens if I hit a low and I just run out of candy in

Taylor:

the house, there's a lot of things that come with that a lot of immediate growing

Taylor:

up that you kind of have to do because when you're a kid and you're a teenager,

Taylor:

you're like my body's invincible.

Taylor:

I can do whatever the hell I want, and so for that to have

Taylor:

to be a focus, it can be a lot.

Taylor:

So, Definitely understand and, and happy to, continue to support you

Taylor:

guys and connect you with people who can really speak to that.

Taylor:

So I want to dive more into, how mental health directly

Taylor:

affects the body in a Ryan.

Taylor:

You kind of touched on like this deep connection and how we can translate.

Taylor:

And I, I'm curious to get a better understanding from you guys of when

Taylor:

we don't take care of our mental health and when our bodies start to

Taylor:

change, like how do we treat that?

Taylor:

How do we re align that connection to ensure that not only are we mentally,

Taylor:

working ourselves out, but we're making sure that it's also helping

Taylor:

our bodies as well, because I also believe that, when you work on your

Taylor:

mind and your spirit, it ensures that every decision that you make towards

Taylor:

your body is, is in sync with that.

Taylor:

But when it's out of alignment, how do we bring that back?

Taylor:

So that way we can ensure that we can actually listen to those

Taylor:

signs and those cues that, Hey, something's off or something's wrong.

Taylor:

Brian, we'll start with you on this

Ryanne:

Yeah.

Ryanne:

So I think you can kind of start with any of those three and you'll start to

Ryanne:

see a little changes in the other two.

Ryanne:

So whether you start with the spiritual aspect, the mental health

Ryanne:

aspect, or the physical aspect, you'll start to see an improvement.

Ryanne:

When we eat better and we exercise and we get sunshine, when we socialize, when

Ryanne:

we drink water, all of those things.

Ryanne:

It's helping our bodies produce the right hormones that we need to

Ryanne:

feel happier to manage our stress.

Ryanne:

If we're going to therapy, if we're utilizing our coping skills, we're

Ryanne:

going to have more of the motivation and desire to do things like eating

Ryanne:

healthier and getting out of the house.

Ryanne:

And spiritually, if you're connecting to something that feels really good for you

Ryanne:

it, it really helps you just same thing.

Ryanne:

Just feel that energy to utilize in those other, other ways.

Ryanne:

So things that I use with my clients a lot is just journaling is a huge one.

Ryanne:

Writing down how you're feeling what's going on for you.

Ryanne:

Like habit tracking things along those lines, meditation, mindfulness.

Ryanne:

I'll bring those up a time.

Ryanne:

I know Lauren's not a fan of using them for herself, which she might

Ryanne:

explain, but it doesn't work for everybody, but for me it does work.

Ryanne:

And so because of that, being my experience, I usually

Lauren:

share that with people.

Taylor:

that's awesome.

Taylor:

That's awesome.

Taylor:

Lauren, what's your take

Taylor:

So,

Lauren:

yeah.

Lauren:

Sorry.

Lauren:

I'm like having a moment.

Lauren:

Yeah.

Lauren:

And I agree with Ryan yeah, the mindfulness meditation doesn't work

Lauren:

for me because I just have so many thoughts going through my brain,

Lauren:

which if you work on mindfulness meditation, you'll settle those thoughts.

Lauren:

So it's kind of one of those things.

Lauren:

But yeah, I feel like it's really important to adopt some type of

Lauren:

routine for yourself of positive coping skills, which is what I talk

Lauren:

about consistently with my students.

Lauren:

They're probably sick of me talking about it, but that really is the tool.

Lauren:

The best tool that therapists can guide you on is finding positive

Lauren:

things that make you feel good that contribute to a healthy.

Lauren:

Stress-free routine.

Lauren:

And they can be anything, there's like the classic getting outside, going on

Lauren:

a walk going to the beach, stuff like that, but then it can be something

Lauren:

like watching your favorite TV show.

Lauren:

It doesn't always have to be so like woo lieu or non tech tech involved.

Lauren:

But I feel like for me, what, like what's helped me is developing a really great

Lauren:

support system where I feel like I can talk with people in my life about how

Lauren:

I'm feeling, I think without the support system, everything else doesn't matter.

Lauren:

So for me, it's like your support system matters.

Lauren:

Get rid of people who aren't there for you, who or give toxic energy.

Lauren:

If you need more support, find those support groups.

Lauren:

I run.

Lauren:

I run a women's group, there's over 3000 members.

Lauren:

My intention was started to Get people connected.

Lauren:

And now it's just like booming the last couple months and people are

Lauren:

looking for friends, so it's out there.

Lauren:

But also just spending, yeah.

Lauren:

Spending time with people that I love listening to music.

Lauren:

I mean, these are really basic things, but they all help with my stress levels.

Lauren:

I'm feel like I'm just, self-disclosing a lot today, but I feel really safe here.

Lauren:

So thank you, Taylor.

Lauren:

But I have IBS and to, to me to manage IBS, you have to manage your stress.

Lauren:

And I suffered for it for years.

Lauren:

I've suffered with it for years.

Lauren:

And it really, it was really awful, but the last year during COVID I curved

Lauren:

it and I'm like, how did that happen?

Lauren:

Maybe because I needed to listen to my body and kind of slow down.

Lauren:

Not run around everywhere and do everything because that's my mentality.

Lauren:

I'm very much like I can't sit still.

Lauren:

Like I'm wasting my time.

Lauren:

If I'm taking the day off, that's just who I am.

Lauren:

But like clearly my body needed it.

Lauren:

So when we listened to our bodies I mean, that's kind of the best advice I

Lauren:

could give is find the support system, listen to your body and develop a stress

Lauren:

free routine that helps curb any of the stress that we experience day to day.

Taylor:

Yeah.

Taylor:

Yeah, no, I definitely feel that in that I feel like.

Taylor:

2020 was the universe is collective message of everybody.

Taylor:

Just sit the fuck down, just sit down and chill out for a second, because

Taylor:

we are constantly in this moving, evolving, type atmosphere, right?

Taylor:

I mean, if you, if we look at our history, none of us could sit still long enough.

Taylor:

We had to move on to the next thing we had to build.

Taylor:

The next thing we had to create the next thing.

Taylor:

And to actually take time for yourself, you discover so much, there's so much that

Taylor:

I didn't realize that I was struggling with until I was forced to get quiet.

Taylor:

And, obviously the goal is to not have to be forced to do that, but it's still

Taylor:

powerful when you really can understand like, Oh, I've been struggling with

Taylor:

this and I need to acknowledge that and I need to sit with that and I need to

Taylor:

understand why is it that I feel this way, or why does this thing from 10

Taylor:

years ago still bother me and, I'm fine.

Taylor:

I'm totally fine.

Taylor:

As women that lived.

Taylor:

So that's our favorite line, right.

Taylor:

I'm totally fine.

Taylor:

There's nothing wrong, fine, fine, fine.

Taylor:

So I appreciate, again, your vulnerability and I'm glad that this container is, is

Taylor:

safe for you because we don't talk about it enough, I don't think I'll ever get

Taylor:

sick of any of us talking about the stuff that we're going through and how we're

Taylor:

able to, support our own overall wellness.

Taylor:

So Lauren, you already hit the nail on the head of what I was going to ask next.

Taylor:

So Ryan, I'm going to jump to you and, and ask on what are your

Taylor:

personal ways that you've worked on your overall mental health?

Taylor:

I know you talked about mindfulness and meditation, but just, curious to know

Taylor:

what are those kind of deeper things that have really supported you and ensuring

Taylor:

that your mental health is, is top-notch.

Ryanne:

So I would say, and I kind of said this at the beginning.

Ryanne:

The biggest thing I did for myself without even realizing I was doing it for myself.

Ryanne:

Was to move.

Ryanne:

I suffer from depression and anxiety.

Ryanne:

I have for a very, very long time.

Ryanne:

And it's gone in waves of being very bad and intense and me

Ryanne:

needing to be on medication too.

Ryanne:

It being mostly gone and, and manageable when I left California.

Ryanne:

And I love California.

Ryanne:

It's nothing against California, but for, for me, like you're saying,

Ryanne:

like something was screaming at me to say, like, there, you need to

Ryanne:

change your environment for you to be able to get a better hold of this.

Ryanne:

So I did, I laughed.

Ryanne:

And as soon as I got here, I remember telling Lauren, like

Lauren:

my anxiety's

Ryanne:

better.

Ryanne:

My depression is better.

Ryanne:

My like blood sugar, like my blood pressure is better.

Ryanne:

Like everything has gotten better just by me changing my environment.

Ryanne:

And sometimes that's what it takes for us to have a big growth.

Ryanne:

In mental health or even physical health is just changing where you are and

Ryanne:

kind of pressing the refresh button.

Ryanne:

So because of that, I've seen a huge, huge amount of change in myself.

Ryanne:

I've noticed my ability to grow in my own mental health, to be

Ryanne:

stronger in my own mental health.

Ryanne:

And just my desire to take care of myself better.

Ryanne:

Now I enjoy being outside a lot more

Lauren:

things along those lines.

Taylor:

Yeah.

Taylor:

I really love the change your environment, because even when it comes to to

Taylor:

friend circles, Lauren, you kind of touched on this too about like getting

Taylor:

rid of people who have toxic energy.

Taylor:

And I, I'm such a people person that I, my, my best friend says, I

Taylor:

like to collect people and I'm like, I don't like to collect people.

Taylor:

I just.

Taylor:

I'm that person, whether it's sober or not.

Taylor:

I'm like, Oh my God, let's be friends like exchange numbers.

Taylor:

Oh my God.

Taylor:

It's not just a one-off thing, but it truly is something where there

Taylor:

has to be an application process.

Taylor:

Because when you start allowing so many people and entities to

Taylor:

surround you, you really don't get how much it can affect you in.

Taylor:

And for me, I don't know if you guys are in paths, but I'm very much an impact.

Taylor:

And so I'm, it's easy for me to tune into people and I've had to learn to

Taylor:

control that because I would tune in so hard that it would be devastating

Taylor:

when someone would just randomly break the connection for no reason.

Taylor:

And so that environment can really make or break how you do something

Taylor:

because, if I'm constantly surrounded by people who are like on the goat, got

Taylor:

to move, got to build this next thing.

Taylor:

That's what I want to do too, versus having a mixture of like,

Taylor:

okay, somebody who's constantly grinding for their business.

Taylor:

That's awesome.

Taylor:

But I also have someone who really loves to play and wants to, to be childlike.

Taylor:

And that helps that's helpful too.

Taylor:

And then someone who loves nature and, it's nice to keep a mix of

Taylor:

that, but, even when you're by yourself, change of scenery, because

Taylor:

especially after this past year, our homes have become everything.

Taylor:

And so not being able to, see different environments.

Taylor:

It's hard.

Taylor:

I will say though.

Taylor:

So I recently got an Oculus and that has been a wonderful escape for me.

Taylor:

One, cause it's, it's my new workout thing and that's, what's been keeping

Taylor:

me constant and moving my body.

Taylor:

But even I use this app called trip, which is a like meditation kind of app.

Taylor:

And it's really cool because they take you through these very visual

Taylor:

experiences and the scenery changes.

Taylor:

And I come out of that because I know I'm sitting in my living room, but because

Taylor:

it's just so visual and it's illusion, it is really calmed me down in a sense

Taylor:

of like, okay, I can get through the day now because I got to even for a

Taylor:

snap second, get away from my space.

Taylor:

And, and Ryan, I'm kind of where you're at.

Taylor:

I'm like, it's time to change my environment.

Taylor:

I love Austin.

Taylor:

I really do, but I'm ready to, to expand into starting over feels.

Taylor:

So different, and I think our generation we're used to that, we're used to kind

Taylor:

of that start over process and it can be very therapeutic to have to find new

Taylor:

friends there, not have to, but, meeting new people and experiencing new places and

Taylor:

you scenery and not the same highways and cities and things that we're involved in.

Taylor:

So, yeah, I'm all for I'm much a nomad too.

Taylor:

I've just been a, no matter on the city, I haven't jumped to city lines and so, okay.

Taylor:

So I want to talk all things, dope, shit therapy pod, because you guys

Taylor:

have been crushing it in terms of the things that you brought up.

Taylor:

I think my favorite one so far is when you brought up the

Taylor:

Brittany Spears documentary, I still haven't watched it Lauren.

Taylor:

Okay.

Taylor:

I know, I know.

Taylor:

I need to watch it because y'all's take on it.

Taylor:

I'm just like.

Taylor:

I knew we needed to leave Brittany alone, but I just did not understand how

Taylor:

deep we needed to leave Britney alone.

Taylor:

So it is on my list.

Taylor:

That's actually my next my, I call it veg out session where I'm like,

Taylor:

I'm doing nothing but watching last last week it was weird.

Taylor:

Movies were knockoff movies.

Taylor:

And I watched this crazy Nicholas cage one where it was like this alien that

Taylor:

comes to earth every six years comment.

Taylor:

And it was weird y'all I laughed all the way through and it was great.

Taylor:

I love watching cringe-worthy movies where it's just like, and it was 2020.

Taylor:

So I'm like, Nikki, you hurting for a check that bad, like face-off

Taylor:

is still not making you money.

Taylor:

Like, so I love doing that kind of stuff or like cheesy martial arts movies.

Taylor:

Although some of them are surprisingly really good and I'm like crying

Taylor:

at the end, where does this?

Taylor:

So anyways I love the things that you guys talk about.

Taylor:

And I wanna know, like, what are the plans for the future and, with you

Taylor:

guys being in separate spaces in the world starting to creep into, in okay.

Taylor:

I think we can play nice with each other, hopefully.

Taylor:

What do you guys want to do with the show?

Taylor:

Where do you want to take it?

Taylor:

And you got any cool stuff coming up?

Taylor:

Cause, cause I, I love when people have cool stuff coming up,

Lauren:

it's so funny.

Lauren:

You mentioned.

Lauren:

Okay.

Lauren:

I guess.

Ryanne:

Oh

Lauren:

me.

Lauren:

Okay.

Lauren:

I was just going to say it's so funny.

Lauren:

You mentioned the Britney Spears episode that we did, because that

Lauren:

is by far the most discussed episode amongst people that have listened.

Lauren:

I've now heard that at least like six, seven times from like people

Lauren:

who've listened to the episode.

Lauren:

They were, I don't know if you knew this Ryan, but it just so funny,

Lauren:

like that was us just being like, you know what, we we've always,

Lauren:

loved Britney Spears growing up.

Lauren:

She was like an idol to us.

Lauren:

And we were like, let's just give our, take on this experience

Lauren:

of watching her documentary.

Lauren:

So it's so interesting that people have just picked up

Lauren:

on what we were putting down.

Lauren:

So thank you.

Lauren:

Coming up.

Lauren:

We have a lot of great episodes releasing next week we have case Kenny, I don't know

Lauren:

if you've heard of case Kenny, but he is.

Lauren:

How would you describe him?

Lauren:

I have such a hard time describing him, Ryan.

Lauren:

I don't know.

Ryanne:

So he's kind of like a positive mindset podcaster.

Ryanne:

He's been doing it for about three years.

Ryanne:

He's like top something on Apple podcasts.

Ryanne:

Like he's always the top on his wellness category.

Ryanne:

But he does like these really short episodes about just things that

Ryanne:

are relatable to everybody, like, like ghosting and red flags and,

Ryanne:

What attract most of it's usually surrounding dating and stuff, but

Ryanne:

he's done some other things as well.

Ryanne:

Confidence, things like that.

Ryanne:

So yeah, our episode with him releases on Monday, we're really excited

Lauren:

about it.

Taylor:

That's cool.

Taylor:

That's cool.

Taylor:

So, are you guys you guys are audio only.

Taylor:

Are you guys gonna gonna creep into the video space or, or do you all do feel

Taylor:

I've only listened to on Apple podcast?

Taylor:

So forgive me if I didn't

Lauren:

No, we do.

Lauren:

We do video and we do a snippet.

Lauren:

Every Friday of an episode release week, we do a snippet

Lauren:

of the video from our recording.

Lauren:

And maybe one day I feel like, and maybe you can relate.

Lauren:

Taylor, just like getting into the podcast space was us

Lauren:

learning everything on our own.

Lauren:

No one taught us anything.

Lauren:

Other than like tips and tricks, obviously from different groups.

Lauren:

But everything we do is as our own.

Lauren:

So I think when we find maybe a little bit more time or are ready to take it

Lauren:

to the next level, we'll definitely include more of our, our video.

Lauren:

But I think focusing on the conversation is our main goal and sometimes it's

Lauren:

a little bit hard to do with video.

Lauren:

So, but not

Taylor:

opposed to it.

Taylor:

Okay.

Taylor:

Would you guys ever go into practice together?

Taylor:

Like, like dope shit therapy.

Taylor:

That, that would be cool.

Taylor:

I would join.

Taylor:

I'd be like, yup.

Taylor:

Sign me up.

Taylor:

Sounds like my

Taylor:

If Ryan

Lauren:

wants to move back to California and get licensed here,

Lauren:

we can open up a practice in San Diego and she can specialize in

Lauren:

I don't know.

Lauren:

I love that we have the podcast to kind of, this is ourselves.

Lauren:

Like if, if people listen to our podcast, this is truly us, nothing is censored.

Lauren:

This is totally us sharing what we want to share, talking about

Lauren:

what we want to talk about.

Lauren:

So it's nice to have a space that like isn't censored.

Lauren:

By our job, if that makes sense.

Lauren:

Even though that is our job but there's, there's a lot of rules in,

Lauren:

therapy of things we can and cannot do.

Lauren:

And so it's nice to just have, like, this is from me.

Lauren:

I'm not, I, I am a therapist, we are therapists, but this

Lauren:

isn't a therapist podcast.

Lauren:

It's two women who know a thing or two about mental health,

Lauren:

but also are our own person.

Lauren:

And we can just talk about whatever we want to talk about, which is why

Lauren:

we did the episode on Brittany Spears.

Lauren:

It felt really cathartic to kind of share our experience of

Lauren:

like, leave this woman alone.

Lauren:

She can't defend herself.

Lauren:

So that's my

Taylor:

take

Ryanne:

I completely agree.

Ryanne:

We really started this podcast as a way for us to have almost

Ryanne:

something for us, I guess.

Ryanne:

But we're both creative people.

Ryanne:

We needed an outlet for it.

Ryanne:

When you're a therapist, you do a lot of giving.

Ryanne:

And although we are giving with this podcast too, it's in a way that we feel

Ryanne:

like we can, we can do whatever we want.

Ryanne:

So I don't know about Lauren, but I'm assuming, based on our

Ryanne:

conversations that, dope shit.

Ryanne:

My therapist says it's our brand that we want to be.

Ryanne:

Create and build off of off the side of being a therapist, we don't

Ryanne:

want to combine them together.

Ryanne:

We're utilizing our degrees and our knowledge and our love of mental health

Ryanne:

to create and utilize in this brand.

Ryanne:

But we don't want to really like combine them together to be one giant thing.

Ryanne:

Like we're enjoying that separation.

Taylor:

Yeah.

Taylor:

I will say if you guys ever want to continue breaking down, like crazy

Taylor:

media, mental health breakdowns, like I'm not going to let, the

Taylor:

first thing that came to mind was

Ryanne:

Oh God.

Taylor:

When he like, lost his shit with Gail and I'm just like,

Taylor:

let's, let's break this down.

Taylor:

What kind of, psychological thing you're going.

Taylor:

I think those would be really cool because you, you get all these

Taylor:

takes from so many different big wig professionals, but it's nice to know,

Taylor:

like what do everyday, therapists think of like, Hey, if, if he came into my

Taylor:

space and we were talking about this, like here's what the breakdown was.

Taylor:

Lauren, you hit it right on the head.

Taylor:

The, the Brittany Spears thing was so compelling because you're always hearing

Taylor:

it from these, higher level experts and there are higher level experts

Taylor:

everywhere, and it's nice to hear from those perspectives because you guys did

Taylor:

just as much work to earn your degrees and your licensees as other people.

Taylor:

So, yeah.

Taylor:

I don't know why R Kelly came to mind, but I just, I think it's hilarious,

Taylor:

honestly, the entire, whatever that is, Aaliyah was one of my favorite

Taylor:

Oh, yeah.

Taylor:

I'm just like,

Taylor:

On it.

Taylor:

going on that Brady,

Lauren:

Honestly, Taylor, if he came into my office, I'd refer him out immediately.

Lauren:

There's just no way.

Lauren:

There's just no way.

Lauren:

No, I agree.

Lauren:

I really like, I haven't, I haven't watched R Kelly.

Lauren:

But I, Aaliyah was just so precious and perfect.

Lauren:

And I, it's just I have been watching the Demi Lovato documentary that's on YouTube

Lauren:

and that one would, might be a good one for us, maybe Ryan to come together.

Lauren:

And because it touches on a lot of substance usage which is different

Lauren:

from Brittany because Brittany is suffering with a lot of other issues.

Lauren:

But Demi, I followed her since the beginning, since I was a Disney

Lauren:

kid and we're like the same age.

Lauren:

So I've seen her like up and down.

Lauren:

So potentially if Ryan's on board, we could a dissectomy.

Lauren:

The

Ryanne:

thing is like the whole celebrity thing is so Lauren,

Ryanne:

like, she is so good at that.

Ryanne:

She's the one who runs into celebrities.

Ryanne:

She knows all of the details.

Ryanne:

If you ask me, I have no clue.

Ryanne:

I'm like, all I know is R Kelly did something bad.

Ryanne:

I have no clue what you're talking about.

Ryanne:

Taylor completely over my head.

Ryanne:

I actually never even watched the Brittany Spears documentary.

Ryanne:

Like Lauren's like, Oh, watch this, watch that.

Ryanne:

And honestly, half the time my coping skills are laying

Ryanne:

on the couch with my dog.

Ryanne:

On Instagram.

Ryanne:

That's my problem is my Instagram habit.

Ryanne:

So if we do this, I'm

Lauren:

actually going to have to watch the documentary this time.

Taylor:

You'll just have to message me and I'll watch it with you.

Taylor:

Because again, that's one that I really want to see.

Taylor:

Cause I, I looked at me and I followed her and, same Disney kid kind of thing.

Taylor:

And I liked that she was different in, that's when all of the singing and

Taylor:

dancing like movies kept coming out.

Taylor:

And I will say I could have gone the rest of my life without high school musical.

Lauren:

Oh yeah, sure.

Lauren:

Yeah.

Taylor:

Zach and Vanessa and all y'all.

Taylor:

But One was enough and y'all did three.

Taylor:

So yeah,

Taylor:

Megan stop, especially when South park did their episode on it.

Taylor:

I'm like, no guys don't fall for it, but I love how they makes fun of stuff.

Taylor:

So I, I guess I had to let it happen.

Taylor:

But you guys, I would love to ask you one last question of, if somebody is

Taylor:

nervous about going to therapy, what's one piece of advice that you would

Taylor:

give them about taking that first step into, working on their mental

Taylor:

health and Ryan, let's start with you.

Ryanne:

I guess research, like looking at it the same way you would going to

Ryanne:

a doctor, like look up the therapist, you're trying to find, understand

Ryanne:

what you really want to work on first.

Ryanne:

And then that'll help guide you in picking a therapist because a lot of

Ryanne:

therapists, their profiles will say like, Oh, I focus on this, this and this.

Ryanne:

And then that can kind of help guide you on who you're going to pick.

Lauren:

The other

Ryanne:

thing too is, getting therapy is not selfish.

Ryanne:

And I think a lot of people may come from that perspective when they're

Ryanne:

nervous to go to therapy, like, Oh, I'm just gonna be talking about myself and,

Ryanne:

blah, blah, blah, my friends for that.

Ryanne:

Or what are they gonna think?

Ryanne:

What are they gonna judge me?

Ryanne:

And, here's how I would let therapist, I tell my clients this all the time.

Ryanne:

If they're like, I can't believe I'm saying this.

Ryanne:

I'm like, Hmm.

Ryanne:

You you're fine.

Ryanne:

Trust me.

Ryanne:

We have heard lots of things so far, and we're not judging you.

Ryanne:

Like we really could care less in the way of like, it's good.

Ryanne:

We care less, we're just here to listen and absorb it.

Ryanne:

And we really, really aren't judgmental in our, in our day to day with that, with

Ryanne:

our work, we just really care and want to know how we can listen and be supportive.

Ryanne:

So I think, if you understand that, a therapist has gotten under this job

Ryanne:

because we do care about humans in general, and that we're really wanting to

Ryanne:

listen and understand you, that might be a

Lauren:

little bit more supportive.

Lauren:

Yeah.

Lauren:

I, I feel like something that a lot of people are nervous about besides

Lauren:

obviously opening up and being vulnerable is fear of judgment.

Lauren:

And that's why I do think, like Ryan said research it's important because

Lauren:

I feel like, yeah, if I were to have a therapist who is like in their

Lauren:

sixties, like my mom's age, I don't know that I'd be so comfortable.

Lauren:

So finding someone maybe who is a little bit younger, if you're younger, Finding a

Lauren:

male, if you want a male versus a female.

Lauren:

And that's what, psychology today is for a lot of therapists have

Lauren:

profiles on there and they talk about what they specialize in.

Lauren:

But you know, you can always break up with your therapist if it doesn't go the way

Lauren:

you want it to, or you don't feel heard.

Lauren:

One of the biggest things is that I think people get turned off with therapy when

Lauren:

their therapist is a bad match for them.

Lauren:

And it happens because we're humans.

Lauren:

So like sometimes I'll have a friend say, yeah, my therapist

Lauren:

isn't, isn't hearing me.

Lauren:

Right.

Lauren:

And so I say, okay, give it a few sessions.

Lauren:

And.

Lauren:

Talk about what you might need from them, which is really hard, but it's allowed

Lauren:

and not talked about often again, if a therapist is going to get butt hurt over

Lauren:

that, they are in the wrong profession.

Lauren:

And it's up to us to use our professional sense of self outside of the session

Lauren:

to talk about our feelings, because we are allowed to get butt hurt.

Lauren:

We just can't talk about that with the client, because

Lauren:

it's totally unprofessional.

Lauren:

But it's important for you to find the right match.

Lauren:

And if it's not immediately, I mean, you need to give it a little bit of time.

Lauren:

Probably I'd say a couple of months and unless it's just God, awful then get out.

Lauren:

But yeah, you might just need to research the type of person that you

Lauren:

want as your therapist who specializes in what you're looking for, but also

Lauren:

is, is hearing you and giving you

Ryanne:

so.

Taylor:

Yeah, no, I think both of you make very valid points in that.

Taylor:

Do your research, it's okay to find profiles and reviews just

Taylor:

like you would when you're about to make a new purchase on something.

Taylor:

And it's not to make, you as human sounds like products, but you know, the

Taylor:

service that you're getting, you want to know that you're going to get something

Taylor:

value out of a valuable out of it.

Taylor:

And Lauren, I love your, your aspect of like, Find your mirror, I don't have

Taylor:

anything against male therapists, but you don't have the same body parts as me.

Taylor:

So if I need to talk about some stuff, I want a female therapist who understands,

Taylor:

the ups and downs of womanhood, sometimes when me and my partner did

Taylor:

couples therapy, we specifically wanted a woman of color because she could

Taylor:

understand some of the things that we go through from a cultural standpoint.

Taylor:

And it can be difficult to try to explain that to somebody who's not

Taylor:

a part of your culture and it's not to, add to any type of racial divide.

Taylor:

It's just like right now for my sanity, I need somebody who gets

Taylor:

it, but my therapist used, she's a white lady and I love her to death.

Taylor:

Shout out to Kelly because she has been my favorite therapist for the last two years.

Taylor:

She's a fellow Texan too.

Taylor:

And, and something, she just knows how to just draw stuff out of me.

Taylor:

And I've, I've gone leaps and bounds.

Taylor:

She was a big honestly person when I was thinking about doing this a, the podcast.

Taylor:

Be quitting my job to pursue my own passions and programs

Taylor:

outside of the podcast.

Taylor:

She's been there for every step.

Taylor:

So, finding a good therapist is so important and it is I actually dated,

Taylor:

I dated two therapists before I settled on Kelly and I felt so bad.

Taylor:

I was like, I'm cheating on them because I was trying to trial them out.

Taylor:

Like, like you said, it's okay to try them out because you don't know the vibe

Taylor:

of somebody until you spent a little bit of time with them, just like you would

Taylor:

a friend or, a possible partner because everybody puts on their best behavior

Taylor:

at the beginning, most therapists don't.

Taylor:

But for yourself, you're like, do I really want to open up to this person?

Taylor:

Do I feel comfortable with them?

Taylor:

And so, but I definitely felt like, like a two timing.

Taylor:

you are just a terrible person because both of these

Taylor:

women are trying to help you.

Taylor:

And you're just you're scheming on it.

Taylor:

I didn't tell Kelly, cause I literally felt so bad for the other lady.

Taylor:

I was like, I just want you to know at the very beginning I was seeing another

Taylor:

therapist at the same time as you.

Taylor:

I'm sorry, girl, if you don't.

Taylor:

Oh, I'm in the session now I can keep going.

Taylor:

That's

Ryanne:

so funny.

Taylor:

So anyways ladies, you, yeah, it's, it's, it's, I'm, I'm dramatic.

Taylor:

It's it's the theater kid in me, but y'all, this has been really

Taylor:

informative and really awesome.

Taylor:

And I thank you both for your time and energy and perspective on this.

Taylor:

If people want to keep up with the show and everything that you guys

Taylor:

are doing, how can they find you?

Taylor:

How can they connect with you and yeah.

Taylor:

Yeah, if they, yeah, that's my question.

Ryanne:

Okay.

Ryanne:

So you can find us on Instagram.

Ryanne:

That is the, well, that's a lie.

Ryanne:

We have an Instagram, a tick talk and clubhouse now.

Ryanne:

So it's the same across all.

Ryanne:

It is dope.

Ryanne:

S H T therapy pod.

Lauren:

And.

Lauren:

We also, what

Ryanne:

was the other question?

Ryanne:

Oh, our podcasts.

Ryanne:

You can find us on Apple, Spotify, I heart radio.

Ryanne:

We're supposed to be on Amazon, although it hasn't been popping up.

Ryanne:

But basically you could find this in

Lauren:

most, most podcast platforms.

Taylor:

Real quick.

Taylor:

How are y'all liking

Lauren:

I'm on it.

Lauren:

I'm on it.

Taylor:

go find y'all y'all are

Lauren:

Yeah.

Taylor:

Are you on clubhouse

Lauren:

Taylor?

Lauren:

Okay, I'll follow you.

Lauren:

Because I was in a room yesterday.

Lauren:

I created a room with two other women.

Lauren:

I know.

Lauren:

And we were talking about life after the pandemic.

Lauren:

It was really good conversation.

Lauren:

Just got to get more people on board

Ryanne:

grow.

Taylor:

Yeah.

Taylor:

Yeah.

Taylor:

I'll, I'll go find you guys because now it's a time suck.

Taylor:

It's it's very true.

Taylor:

What they say that you will find yourselves accidentally on there

Taylor:

for, I think my longest was six

Lauren:

Whoa.

Taylor:

And I was only talking to one person and we just, we

Taylor:

just fell into, to this stride.

Taylor:

But there are a lot of great rooms, a lot of great room diabetic rooms.

Taylor:

So, once I find you guys, I'm happy to ping you in on

Lauren:

No.

Lauren:

Yeah, that'd be

Taylor:

one of my friends on there, she does like type one

Taylor:

for caregivers and parents.

Taylor:

And then there's another one that we do on Mondays.

Taylor:

That's like everything, but diabetes, it's like a play on words and it's a

Taylor:

room full of different diabetics and, and others who want to be allies to listen

Taylor:

in on, the things that we go through.

Taylor:

Sometimes they change the topic on like dating or, drinking, stuff like that.

Taylor:

So I will definitely be finding you on clubhouse because I like cliff house.

Taylor:

It's just finding the, the, the shutoff step away, turn it off.

Taylor:

It's almost worse than

Lauren:

if you're not, if you're in a bigger room treating it like a podcast

Lauren:

and cleaning and doing things like I did the other day, I was on it for like

Lauren:

two hours, but I was doing other things because it was a thousand person room.

Lauren:

So it just depends also on my energy level, which I think is great

Lauren:

with clubhouse is that I could go, okay, I really want to talk today.

Lauren:

Like who's down to talk and what room can I go in that small?

Lauren:

And then other days I'm like, I'll just listen.

Lauren:

And it's like thousand people and I'm like, great.

Lauren:

I don't to raise my hands.

Lauren:

So it's

Taylor:

nice.

Taylor:

The options.

Lauren:

It

Ryanne:

is under, so our podcast clubhouse is under my name because you

Ryanne:

have to put a name in Lauren already had created her own personal one.

Ryanne:

So yeah.

Ryanne:

I'm not really doing much on it yet.

Ryanne:

I just haven't had the energy to figure out it and, kind of have a lot

Ryanne:

on my plate, but we are planning on making it a thing and utilizing it.

Ryanne:

So I just need my, our podcast one, so we could branch off from

Ryanne:

there and do, do all the things.

Ryanne:

So yes, feel free to follow.

Ryanne:

And hopefully in the very near future, we can actually start

Lauren:

making some strides with it.

Taylor:

Yeah.

Taylor:

Yeah.

Taylor:

Well, thank you ladies.

Taylor:

Both for, for sparing the time.

Taylor:

I know this won't be the last time that we chat.

Taylor:

But I'm looking forward to everything that you guys are doing in the podcast

Taylor:

space and then some, and appreciate your perspective on, helping other

Taylor:

diabetics know that therapy is 100%.

Taylor:

Okay.

Taylor:

And that you should go for it to ensure that you're getting

Taylor:

the help that you need.

Taylor:

So until next time guys, we will catch you next week.

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