Shownotes
No matter what we are setting out to do in our lives in the personal or professional context, we are "captains" of our own starships. In this episode, we explore the debilitating concept of fear and what it can potentially do to us if we are not able to move forward, particularly when we are in situations that limit us from our fullest potential of our voice. By rethinking the concept of fear, we can start to make inroads to the true successes we wish to see in our lives, and start to overcome the barriers to our successes. Being a captain means having other support staff, including a First Officer, being by your side!
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Intro/Outro By: Michael Dugan, Podcast Host: Voice4Chefs
Transcripts
Welcome to the podcast where relationships, confidence, and
Intro:determination, all converge into an amazing, heartfelt experience.
Intro:This is Speaking From The Heart.
Joshua:Welcome back to episode number 15 of Speaking From the Heart.
oday we're going to the stars:where no one has gone before, and yes, you
oday we're going to the stars:might be very well familiar with the Star Trek original series in which I grew up
oday we're going to the stars:with, not because I was born and lived in the 1960s, but because of my parents,
oday we're going to the stars:particularly my mom, being a Trekkie, but I think that makes a big difference
oday we're going to the stars:in terms of what we are going to cover today, which is really going places
oday we're going to the stars:where we might be very afraid to go and really figuring out why those emotions
oday we're going to the stars:of fear can actually get into our psyche, creating those issues down the road.
oday we're going to the stars:Now I have to tell you that starting out with this episode, there are a
oday we're going to the stars:few disclosures that I need to make.
oday we're going to the stars:First off, I have been in a life full of fear for many, many, many years.
oday we're going to the stars:Do I claim to know all the answers?
oday we're going to the stars:No, but as a life coach, particularly, I have learned so much about not only
oday we're going to the stars:the things that I've been through, but also because of the experiences
oday we're going to the stars:of so many others, it's allowed me to adopt a worldview that allows
oday we're going to the stars:me to not live in fear anymore.
oday we're going to the stars:As a matter of fact, I rather crave truth and fear approval, which according
oday we're going to the stars:to Joseph Grenny, one of the co-authors of Crucial Conversations for Mastering
oday we're going to the stars:Dialogue often talks about as one of those things that when we're talking
oday we're going to the stars:with someone else, we're really not looking at the approval aspect of it.
oday we're going to the stars:We're looking at what is the evidence, the facts.
oday we're going to the stars:What are the things that we can observe and measure, as opposed to telling
oday we're going to the stars:ourselves a completely different story, and I had to owe it to Joseph
oday we're going to the stars:and the other authors for allowing me to see that view, and allowing me
oday we're going to the stars:to create some of the best things in my life that I even have right now.
oday we're going to the stars:Those are the things that I continue to even build for myself, despite all
oday we're going to the stars:the challenges and all the difficulties that might come alongside of it.
oday we're going to the stars:When we talk about this in a personal and professional sense, sometimes
oday we're going to the stars:those sort of things, especially as we work through them, often require us to
oday we're going to the stars:examine and decide what are the best ways in which we can approach them.
oday we're going to the stars:Do we get on the starship and just start going one direction at full
oday we're going to the stars:impulse, then at warp one, all the way to warp nine; so on, so forth.
oday we're going to the stars:It depends on who you are and I will freely admit too, that even as a coach,
oday we're going to the stars:I have met a variety of different clients even in my short time opening Your
oday we're going to the stars:Speaking Voice that have shown that we all work at different paths, at different
oday we're going to the stars:rates of speed, and having that person that we are talking to, whether that is
oday we're going to the stars:something that they're trying to overcome or it's something that they're trying to
oday we're going to the stars:do on their own, they have to have the proper guidance, not only in the things
oday we're going to the stars:that they're trying to do, but also the things that they're trying to achieve.
oday we're going to the stars:Now, I know that sounds quite convoluted and it's not really particular an
oday we're going to the stars:example because I respect the fact that these are confidential conversations
oday we're going to the stars:that we're having with other people.
oday we're going to the stars:We're really getting into what's below the surface; what's at the
oday we're going to the stars:root of what's causing all those things to happen in the first place.
oday we're going to the stars:To be honest, even with people that go where no one has gone before, there's
oday we're going to the stars:always a little bit of fear that goes alongside of it, and that reminds me
oday we're going to the stars:even of the first opportunity in which I was able to be hired at the state of
oday we're going to the stars:Pennsylvania, in which my very first job was working as a Clerk Typist in
oday we're going to the stars:the Department of Public Welfare, in the county of Berks in Pennsylvania.
oday we're going to the stars:It was my very first state job, and being college educated, you
oday we're going to the stars:would've never expected someone to end up in that sort of situation.
oday we're going to the stars:Not actually receiving public welfare benefits, but actually working in an
oday we're going to the stars:office that helped the public as a whole in a whole variety of different
oday we're going to the stars:ways, whether that is through cash assistance, food stamps, medical
oday we're going to the stars:assistance, or some other combination therein, which might even include some
oday we're going to the stars:of the low income heating assistance programs and even the long-term care
oday we're going to the stars:that some people might need in order to continue living their best life.
oday we're going to the stars:We all fall on hard times, and I had to work in an environment in which
oday we're going to the stars:many people fell on hard times.
oday we're going to the stars:You probably can imagine what that atmosphere would be like.
oday we're going to the stars:The hustle and bustle of having caseworkers interview the recipients,
oday we're going to the stars:the potential recipients of individual benefits that might
oday we're going to the stars:be, or might not be, approved.
oday we're going to the stars:Being able to work in that office allowed me to do a whole bunch of
oday we're going to the stars:different types of administrative tasks.
oday we're going to the stars:Not only was I responsible for the file room, which was being converted into
oday we're going to the stars:a digital expansion library of its own because of the advancement of records
oday we're going to the stars:management technologies, but it also allow me to view the variety of different
oday we're going to the stars:appeals that would come through the office, which would be manually typed in.
oday we're going to the stars:Those appeals would be because of the amount of being awarded; it was not
oday we're going to the stars:high enough, to the fact that there was an outright rejection because they
oday we're going to the stars:have met the income threshold limits.
oday we're going to the stars:I did that for over 15 months to start out before I moved on to my next
oday we're going to the stars:position, which would take me to the area of Harrisburg, but even with all
oday we're going to the stars:those things considered, those were big fears that I had; not just the things
oday we're going to the stars:that I would have on a personal level, but also a professional level as well.
oday we're going to the stars:Now the most typical of professional responses and things that might be
oday we're going to the stars:fearful in nature concluded, "Am I really going to make it here?
oday we're going to the stars:Am I really going to fit in with all my other coworkers?
oday we're going to the stars:Why is that one person look at me weirdly and the other direction?
oday we're going to the stars:Why is that other person staring me down almost as if I did something
oday we're going to the stars:wrong, which I really did not?"
oday we're going to the stars:Those are the sort of common occurrences that you might find in the office,
oday we're going to the stars:but for me, especially starting out, being in my twenties yet and knowing
oday we're going to the stars:that this would be the career path that I would go on at that time, some
oday we're going to the stars:of the personal doubts seep through.
oday we're going to the stars:Am I really going to make it overall?
oday we're going to the stars:Am I ever going to have a friendship with at least one of these people so that I
oday we're going to the stars:can confide in them what is happening?
oday we're going to the stars:Can we really make it through to the other side for the rest of our
oday we're going to the stars:life, working at a place like this?
oday we're going to the stars:Now, don't get me wrong, what I'm not trying to say is that those sort of
oday we're going to the stars:offices are needed because they are and those sort of people are definitely making
oday we're going to the stars:a big difference and helping each other to demonstrate and create some of the best
oday we're going to the stars:people and versions of themselves just by having an extra hand extended to them,
oday we're going to the stars:but sometimes even those adverse effects, the things that we often go through
oday we're going to the stars:often are needed for us to understand and provide maybe some of the most
oday we're going to the stars:basic and necessities to be fulfilled.
oday we're going to the stars:Think of it this way.
oday we're going to the stars:If you ever heard of Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, the pyramid in which we might
oday we're going to the stars:be all familiar with, some of those basics of necessities, which include
oday we're going to the stars:food, water, and shelter, need to be maintained before self-actualization, the
oday we're going to the stars:very top of the pyramid, is fulfilled.
oday we're going to the stars:Having that empowerment at the very top unlocks a whole world of different
oday we're going to the stars:possible needs as well, but the catch is that you always have to have the
oday we're going to the stars:basics fulfilled before you can do anything else, because without those
oday we're going to the stars:basics, we can't move forward as a whole.
oday we're going to the stars:Sometimes living in fear means living in fear of the things that we don't
oday we're going to the stars:have at the bottom of the pyramid because of the struggles that happen in
oday we're going to the stars:our lives, and that's why that office is providing those opportunities.
oday we're going to the stars:Whether you agree with it or not, in providing social benefits, it
oday we're going to the stars:actually helps the society as a whole in being able to have people that
oday we're going to the stars:can be productive, but just need that extra assistance in a short, medium,
oday we're going to the stars:or long-term adventure of its own.
oday we're going to the stars:Even with those things and those aspects taken into consideration, even with
oday we're going to the stars:things that might be holding us back from being able to become the best versions
oday we're going to the stars:of ourselves, those sort of jobs actually build the character that is necessary in
oday we're going to the stars:order for us to move forward to one more step into the direction that is needed.
oday we're going to the stars:For you, I'm sure that tomorrow you're not going to get on a starship
oday we're going to the stars:and go to a place that you have never thought possible because the
oday we're going to the stars:technology simply doesn't exist.
oday we're going to the stars:We have made quite a lot of advancements over the last several years, but we
oday we're going to the stars:still haven't mastered warp technology or the technology that allows us to
oday we're going to the stars:travel beyond the speed of light.
oday we're going to the stars:Even with those adventures in the horizon for humanity itself, the most basic of
oday we're going to the stars:questions for us as an individual is to figure out: What can we do to overcome
oday we're going to the stars:where we might be holding ourselves back?
oday we're going to the stars:The emotion of fear in itself can be debilitating, destroying, even
oday we're going to the stars:deconstructing the very things that we have built in our lives, simply because
oday we're going to the stars:we aren't sure how to best move forward but by harnessing fear and being able
oday we're going to the stars:to use it to our advantage, we can be able to create some of the best
oday we're going to the stars:works of art that we never imagined.
oday we're going to the stars:Now, obviously in episode 13, we talked about that sort of aspect with the
oday we're going to the stars:lighthouse but it goes beyond so much more than helping other people and shining
oday we're going to the stars:that light that you have inside of you.
oday we're going to the stars:It's about seeing where you could potentially go and
oday we're going to the stars:setting a plan for yourself.
oday we're going to the stars:It means building yourself, not only that professional empire that you can
oday we're going to the stars:have, but also building that personal empire as well and it doesn't mean being
oday we're going to the stars:in a negative connotation for yourself.
oday we're going to the stars:You can create some of those basic skill sets so that you no longer have to
oday we're going to the stars:essentially sell yourself just on paper, which in episode 17 coming up, we're going
oday we're going to the stars:to talk about some of those things that we can do, even in the professional sense,
oday we're going to the stars:with our resumes and our interviews to become able to stand out from the crowd.
e truth of the matter is this:no matter where we're at, no matter where
e truth of the matter is this:we're able to go, as long as we know that fear is just a check and balance,
e truth of the matter is this:we can check ourselves when we are going way too far, but balance it with the
e truth of the matter is this:things that we could potentially do in our personal and professional lives.
e truth of the matter is this:Now, if your goal is to be a starship captain, it can be done.
e truth of the matter is this:If your goal is to just get that next promotion at your job so that
e truth of the matter is this:you can be the boss over a team of individuals that you've been able
e truth of the matter is this:to work with and know the work very well, that's even more power to you.
e truth of the matter is this:It's all about not only just setting a plan, but being
e truth of the matter is this:able to execute on net plan.
e truth of the matter is this:If you leverage fear in a way in which you're able to take
e truth of the matter is this:yourself onto that next adventure, nothing stands in your way.
e truth of the matter is this:As a matter of fact, you can create some of those opportunities that you have
e truth of the matter is this:ever dreamed about, maybe even become the most successful of authors, writers,
e truth of the matter is this:entrepreneurs, even people that run the most successful nonprofit missions.
e truth of the matter is this:Those individuals have all one thing in common: drive.
e truth of the matter is this:The drive to be willing to just stay on that path no matter what obstacles
e truth of the matter is this:might stand in their way from one day to the next, to one week, to the
e truth of the matter is this:next, to one month to the next, even from the years and decades to follow.
e truth of the matter is this:For some people, it does take a long time to get to that destination
e truth of the matter is this:because of maybe some of those deeply seated fears that lie dormant inside
e truth of the matter is this:of them, and that can be something in itself that is holding you back.
e truth of the matter is this:While some people are gifted and they're able to make some of those things come
e truth of the matter is this:alive, time after time again, it doesn't mean that you can't do it for yourself.
e truth of the matter is this:It means figuring out a plan that you can utilize and you can execute
e truth of the matter is this:on that will allow you to become what you ultimately wish to become.
e truth of the matter is this:It's essentially allowing you to go where no one has gone before,
e truth of the matter is this:and that's what makes you unique.
e truth of the matter is this:Your plan is different from everybody else's, whether you believe that or not.
e truth of the matter is this:You'll not be the same author as Brene Brown, maybe even JK Rowling, writer
e truth of the matter is this:of the famous Harry Potter series.
e truth of the matter is this:No matter who those people are that you aspire to be, you will never be
e truth of the matter is this:quite like them, but does it mean that you can't be something unique in that
e truth of the matter is this:field so that others can look up to you, and the answer is: absolutely.
e truth of the matter is this:All it takes is for you to just realize that it isn't just about the things
e truth of the matter is this:that you are able to do, but unlocking the doors that stand in front of you,
e truth of the matter is this:whether those are the things that you really didn't want to unlock in the
e truth of the matter is this:first place, because if you are able to embrace those things, fear will never
e truth of the matter is this:stand in your way; but I have to say, fear can also be a tool that you use to your
e truth of the matter is this:advantage and should always listen to it, especially if it's saying "Red Alert",
e truth of the matter is this:and the red color lights are flashing.
e truth of the matter is this:The adventures, especially for even those that have watched Star Trek, are something
e truth of the matter is this:of quite imagination and creativity.
e truth of the matter is this:The different creatures, the different cultures, the different planets; the
e truth of the matter is this:people like Gene Roddenberry were visionaries of their time, in which
e truth of the matter is this:continued to be aspirations for even some of the work that's being done
e truth of the matter is this:with some of the more contemporary series of Star Trek, including even
e truth of the matter is this:some television series that adapt to some of the things that are being done.
e truth of the matter is this:You can empower yourself just like the folks at Star Trek, just by realizing that
e truth of the matter is this:fear doesn't have to dictate where you go.
e truth of the matter is this:Just by realizing that you have that power inside of you, and as long as
e truth of the matter is this:you realize that you don't necessarily have to be the people that you idolize,
e truth of the matter is this:you are able to create some of the best works that you ever imagined.
e truth of the matter is this:With the best laid out plan, anything can be done and that plan, yes, it can
e truth of the matter is this:be changed, manipulated, go off course, but that's why it's always convenient
e truth of the matter is this:to have a navigator and maybe even a captain, AKA a coach, standing alongside
e truth of the matter is this:of you, giving you any sort of advice that you might need along the way.
e truth of the matter is this:Thanks for listening to episode number 15 of Speaking from the
e truth of the matter is this:Heart, and I look forward to hearing from your heart, very soon.
Outro:Thanks for listening.
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Outro:Visit us at www.yourspeakingvoice.biz for more information about potential
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