What if taking your power back isn't selfish — it's sacred?

In this episode, Kayla explores a core wound many women carry: the belief that we must put others — especially men — before ourselves. This conditioning shows up everywhere: carrying the mental load, prioritizing partners' rest over our own, believing pleasure is only for them.

Kayla shares her own journey of unlearning generational programming that taught her to coddle men and treat them as incapable. She explores how this pattern shows up in motherhood, relationships, and especially sexual healing — where clients have been taught their bodies should follow a blueprint instead of being honored as variable and alive.

But here's the truth: when women step back from over-giving, it doesn't just free us — it empowers everyone. It invites men to actually step up and creates space for true co-creation.

This episode also grounds us in the Aries Equinox — the astrological New Year and a powerful portal for renewal. We're in a karmic burn, clearing old cycles to birth the new Earth. And it starts with healing these core wounds within ourselves first.

Always choose love.

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Welcome to Liberation Wisdom. I'm Kayla Moore, a sacred feminine priestess in training and guide on the path of walking as love in a world of chaos.

This podcast is for seekers, healers and anyone who feels the old world crumbling and the new one trying to be born.

Each episode we explore how to liberate ourselves from patriarchal wounds, weave the divine feminine and divine masculine back into harmony and witness the real tangible evidence of the new earth manifesting through collective consciousness shifts. This isn't about bypassing the darkness, it's about alchemizing grief and rage into fuel for co creating what comes next.

We are the light and the love. When we choose love and peace internally, we are also sending those vibrations to be mirrored the world around us. This is Liberation Wisdom.

Always choose love. Welcome beloveds to the Liberation Wisdom podcast. I'm Kayla, your host. I go by she, her, hers, pronouns.

I am a priestess in training and this podcast is about liberating ourselves from patriarchal conditioning through healing core wounds, weaving the divine feminine and divine masculine back into harmony within ourselves and within the world, and giving you real life examples of new earth being created together. We are co creating it together, starting inward and allowing it to be birthed out into the world.

So welcome, welcome to this new version of my podcast that I am starting. So today I wanted to talk a little bit about a core wound that I think is really important for us as women specifically to address within ourselves.

It's been coming up a lot in the collective and then I will kind of ground us in where we are right now and help you kind of see the bigger vision and bigger picture that I have.

So the core wound that I wanted to talk about today is how many of us women have been taught to put others before ourselves and more specifically to put men before ourselves. I have grown up with a mother who is brilliant and amazing and has done many, many great things.

But one thing I noticed even from a very young age, even from about high school age, was that she was taught to put men before herself. She was taught to coddle men to make them more comfortable than she is.

And this was something that was passed down to me and something that I have actively had to work against.

My husband and I live in a multi generational home with my mother and something that I have noticed in their relationship is her consistently making it seem like he is not capable of doing certain things that are not his expertise that maybe I fall a little bit more in line to do, like around organization or researching something, doing a lot of like the mental load of what a partner would do in a relationship or in the household.

My husband has not historically had to do a lot of those things because he has always tended to be the one that's, like, working outside the home or working more than I have been. And so oftentimes I get comments from my mom around like, you know, it would be good if you could help him with this.

It would be good if you could, like, research this for him. It'd be good if you could organize this for him, because he's not good at that. And that has always rubbed me the wrong way.

But I've still had to do my own internal work around. How do I not let that be the way that I move through the world, the way that I interact with my husband?

Because that, at the end of the day, is not what I want. It's not how I want to have a dynamic in my relationship. And something that has come up for me around that, that has been harder.

Some of those things I feel like are a little bit more of that generation. I think I have moved to the point of, like, he is a grown man. Other men are grown men. They are capable of doing these things.

You know, I'm very aware of the mental load. That's something that I work a lot with my clients.

I'm still not at a place where I'd like to be with that in my relationship, But I have cognizantly been aware of it and trying to not just always default to me doing all of those things.

But one thing that I have found that is really hard, that I am seeing and also a lot of my other mom friends, is that a lot of us women, when we were preparing to become a mom, I mean, I know this even for myself when I was thinking about my life and thinking of what I wanted my life to be, Even though being a therapist and now doing the work that I'm doing as a coach, as a priestess, I always wanted something that was outside of the dominant narrative of work. I didn't want to work in a corporate structure.

My first job was working with my mom in her corporate job, as I was just a temp and helping out one of her managers that reported to her. And I was like, this is not for me, this. This, like, routine of get up, do the same thing every single day. Not for me.

So I always knew that I wanted to be my own boss, to. To have autonomy over my schedule. But I also had in the back of my mind that that was partly also because I wanted to be a mom.

And I was already planning from a very young age how to create a schedule that would help me be a mom in an easier way, that it would help me spend more time with my child, it would help me be able to take him to school and do all those things. And it does. It really does. But I also am getting to a point where I want to grow, I want to expand. I actually want to be the breadwinner.

I want to be the one that makes the money for our household so my husband can step away from his soul sucking corporate job and really do some internal work on himself and spend more time with our son. Because I know he really, really wants to do that. And I'm so glad that I have a partner that actually wants to be home and spend time with us.

But it's been really hard for him when the majority of the time that he is awake, he is working.

And so it's been something for me that I have had to learn that just because he is the one that's working outside of the home, just because he is the one that's making the bulk of our income right now, just because. And I hate this about America, but our healthcare system is also tied to a job.

And so he's the one that is assuring that we have health insurance, which is also very important.

Doesn't mean you can't get health insurance at all if you're an entrepreneur, but it's obviously a lot harder route to go than if you get it through your job.

So just because he does all of those things does not just then mean that his needs, his need for rest, his like, you know, whatever he wants to do on the weekend is higher priority than for me for a long time and especially after I had my son. As a mom, you know, moms go through a period of really just being like the one that the child wants to be with.

And you're doing a lot of, you know, giving your body to your baby, from pregnancy to birth to then if you are breastfeeding and even if you're not breastfeeding, like still having to get up in the middle of the night and care for them. My son really, until now, has only really wanted me in the middle of the night.

So I've had to get good at understanding that my needs matter just as much as my husband's, even if my husband has to get up for work in the morning. And I do, but. And like, I do too, but I work from home and you know, maybe I only have like a couple clients that day.

And some other stuff that I need to get done. But my husband has like a full day of work that's okay. Like my work is just as important. I'm like, you know, checking in on my child.

Even if somebody else is watching him while I'm working, I'm usually, you know, they're greeting him in the morning. I take him to school three days a week.

Like I'm doing a lot on top of working and just because I, you know, have a couple clients and then have other stuff that's background stuff of a business that I have to do. I'm also running two businesses right now. So it's okay to give yourself permission.

That the caregiving that has often been devalued by the patriarchy and that you have been told doesn't amount to anything, that you have been penalized for being more about taking care of others than being out in the workforce. It's kind of a double edged sword that if you go out into the workforce, you're viewed as not being a good enough mom or not a good enough homemaker.

And if you are staying at home, then you get penalized for not being in the workforce. And you know, for a long time, I know there are laws around this.

I do still think that this probably happens, but for a long time, I mean, women would try to go back into the workforce after taking care of their children and be like, well, sorry, you've been out of the workforce for five, 10 plus years and you've missed a whole lot, so you're no longer hireable. And it's insane.

So just knowing that if you are struggling with putting people ahead of you, if you're struggling with putting your partner who could be a man ahead of you and feeling like their needs, their desires are more important than yours, you no longer have to accept that. And it comes from patriarchy telling us that this is our job as women, as women, it is our job to caregive.

It is our job to be the homemaker, to carry the mental load, to take care of everyone else before ourselves.

And for women that have been in abusive situations, relationships, this can also be a way to survive that oftentimes you know, that people pleaser that placater. It is an actual survival tactic to help someone survive that situation until hopefully that they can get out.

And I have experience of that in my family, not me personally, but family members that have been through that. So I completely understand that this is not an easy thing to just let go of and say no to.

It is deeply, deeply Rooted in the women that have been on this planet for the last, you know, few generations. So I want you to know that you are allowed to let it go. You are allowed to say no more.

You are allowed to say that sacred no and to know that you are divine. You matter, your needs, your desires matter. And a lot of this conversation comes into the bedroom as well.

A lot of the clients that I work on in their sexual healing feel like they have to cater to their partner and their pleasure. Again, women have been taught that pleasure is not for us, that it is only for our partners.

And unfortunately, our partners, if they are men, are often taught that they are the keepers of all the pleasure as well, and also get frustrated when they feel like their partners don't know what they want or they don't know how to give pleasure to their partner, because that's their job. And so there are a lot of expectations and a lot of narratives that the patriarchy has fed us that are honestly utter bullshit.

And that we get to decide what. Whether or not we want to keep them and whether or not we want to live by them anymore.

And when women are able to reclaim that pleasure is for them and be able to ask for the things that they want and need.

And I just had a conversation yesterday with a client around how bodies are different in every sexual situation situation, and that their partner was getting frustrated around.

Again, the fact that, like, one time you want this, the next time you want that, one time this body part feels good, the next time this body part doesn't feel good. It's like they're trying to create a map of my client's body and go by it each time.

But each time it was changing and their partner was getting really frustrated around that. And then my client was feeling shame around that and feeling like, well, why am. Why am I not fitting the blueprint that they are trying to create?

And it's because bodies are variable, and oftentimes it's because of our hormones.

If you are still a woman with a womb that is cycling, has menstrual cycle and is bleeding once a month, oftentimes it's because of our hormones and where we are in our cycle that dictates what feels good and what doesn't feel good in our bodies, as well as stress and what's going on in our lives and, like, external factors. But there's a lot of internal stuff going on in our bodies that we don't often honor.

And so when we allow what is happening to just be and then actually using consent Consent language to be like, do you want this? Do you want that?

Instead of men feeling like they have to know everything beforehand with no communication, really normalizing communication around that and allowing, you know, his pleasure to not be the central thing that we are trying to achieve, but for both to be co creating pleasure together by having these conversations around, how do you want to approach this in this specific experience? Do you want this this time? Do you want this this time?

What is in our like treasure box of different things that we can pull out during sexual experiences that we want to explore this time.

So being able to fully allow yourself to take up space and to be present and to not feel like you have to put someone else's needs before your own is so important to our healing, to our consciousness rising.

Because just in that, just like in that situation that I described, it's not only women taking their power back and taking up space, but it's allowing men to also recalibrate themselves that they don't get off scot free anymore. They don't get to just do the bare minimum and get praised for it. They are actually being invited to step in further.

And a lot of men actually really want to do that.

I think that is actually part of a lot of how men feel disempowered and, and I know, I know there's a lot of women that are not quite ready to like lean in towards men and understand how patriarchy has disenfranchised them as well. And if you're not there yet, that's okay, I can hold you in that too.

But a lot of men I think also feel very disempowered and feel like they are getting left behind because they have been given those participation trophies. They have been given the like, you're doing the bare minimum. Yay.

And now partners are asking for more and they're like, ooh, I, I don't know what that looks like because I've never been invited to do that.

So when we invite anyone, really when an over giver is stepping back and then allowing someone else to meet them more in the middle, it allows that person to actually feel empowered to then do the things that we are hoping that they will do. Will it, you know, be instantaneous? Probably not.

It's probably going to take a little bit of adjustment, time and time for them to really figure out, okay, what does it mean for me to step into this space? Are, is there healing that I need to do first before I'm able to do that?

But ultimately that is much more of an empowerment dynamic than constantly overdoing and coddling someone. And I really think that we as women have to take responsibility for the ways that we are continuing to perpetuate patriarchy.

I know it's so hard again to think about that. There are ways that we are actually participating in patriarchy and perpetuating how it happens and shows up.

But a lot of us are still really entrenched in the roles of patriarchy.

And we have to honor how we ourselves need to change our ways of thinking, our ways of being, our ways of acting, to pull ourselves out of that role and those expectations and to create a different dynamic that is actually healthier for everyone.

And again, if we do that inter internal work, if we do that work together in our own relationships and in our own homes, then it is going to spread collectively, it is going to spread to the collective consciousness and we are going to raise everyone's vibration and everyone's awareness by doing that ourselves. We are the light. We are the beacon of love and light that shows everyone else around us that this is safe to do. Okay, so now where are we?

I wanted to just say Happy New Moon in Pisces. That is today when I am filming this on March 18th.

And then the day that it this video and podcast will come out is Friday, March 20, which is the Aries equinox. It is the spring equinox in the Northern hemisphere and the fall equinox in the Southern hemisphere. Mercury retrograde also ends today, thankfully.

Still have a couple more weeks before we're like completely out of the shadow of that, but at least we're stationing direct.

It's been a hard Mercury retrograde, but I wanted to ground us in the fact that when you're listening to this, it will be the day of the Aries equinox. And Aries is actually the beginning of the zodiac in whatever, like Western astrology, shamanic astrology that I pay attention to.

Not an astrologer, just love listening to it. And so this is really the marker of the new year in astrology. Now in the Gregorian Calendar, we have January 1st is our new year.

We had the Chinese zodiac New year in February, February 17, and we started the year of the fire Horse. And then now in astrology, this is really our new year point in the zodiac is Aries. This spring equinox is our mark of the new year.

And this day is all about renewal, rebirth, being birthed from the darkness and the void of winter that we've been in. Oh, I don't know about you, but it's been a long. It's been a long winter. So I'm very much looking forward to this. And, you know, we have.

After this point, we have longer days coming forward. On the equinox, it actually means equal, that we have equal amount of day and equal amount of darkness on those days.

So for both the spring and fall equinox, that is the case. And then, of course, on the summer solstice, that is the longest day of the year and shortest night. On the winter solstice, it's the opposite.

It's the shortest day and the longest night of the year. So the equinoxes are fun because they are equal. They are equal in night and day. And we have a lot of renewal type of symbols around this.

You know, new, like, sprouts coming up from the ground that are finally just starting to poke their heads through. We also get Easter during this time, which is historically from the goddess Ostra.

And I won't get into all of that, but actually eggs and, like, hares or bunnies come from the story of the goddess Ostrac. And so that actually is something that we celebrate when it comes to Easter. It's been a little commercialized just a little bit.

And then also, you know, Christianity came in and said, this is when, you know, Jesus resurrects from the dead and all that stuff.

But there is actually a sacred feminine goddess that we still celebrate through things like Easter eggs or eggs that are symbols of renewal and birth. And hairs are also, like, a symbol of renewal and birth and greenery and fresh flowers.

And it's just like everything is starting to bloom, which is beautiful. So this is a day to mark as a new beginning.

We have been in really, really heavy stuff lately, and we have been in kind of what I have been hearing is, like, a karmic burn. A lot of karma has been trying to come up, and that is basically, like, cycles that need to end.

Karma is like, in our blueprint of our soul, there are things that we are here to heal. And so the karma is what we are here to heal.

And we have to be able to, like, look at it, know it, and then decide that we are healing it for it to burn away.

And we've really been in a karmic burn portal for us to really burn away as much as possible, because this is a really, really important Aries equinox. We are giving birth to what a lot of the spiritual community and astrologers are calling new Earth and new Human.

Like, we are physically changing in our biological structure because of the light codes and things that are coming in from galactic beings and from the planets. And, like, this is a really important time where the astrology is showing that we are changing, we are shifting, we are moving into something new.

And we go through these cycles every year, obviously, but this is a point in time where it. It has been fated.

There have been a lot of prophecies written about this time, and there are a lot of different things that I could bring into this conversation. But essentially, I want you to know that I personally believe that this time is for us to take, like, a giant leap in our consciousness.

There are different cycles that we have been in, and this is a moment in our evolution where we get to potentially step out of the cycles that humanity has been in.

And we are now coming back into this lighter time period where there's more harmony, there's more. Is more equity in humanity, but it's a cycle. And so we always go, like, into the light and then back into the dark.

And we have the chance to, like, not do that anymore. We have the chance to, like, rise so high that we come completely out of that cycle, and we no longer have to go back into the darkness again.

So we are in a really, really important time.

And that is why I'm wanting to bring you evidence of how consciousness is shifting, how we are moving forward, and how what I'm talking to you about, like, all these core wounds that I have actually been learning about and healing in myself, and then wanting to help clients do the same. I've primarily focused on sexual healing.

I think all of these wounds go into sexual healing because sexuality is part of being a human and is very much something that has been stripped away from us by the patriarchy. But a lot of these can just be applied to, like, general. How do we take our power back as humans and feel like we can do this differently?

And so I'm bringing these wounds up and wanting to really help you understand them, because the more that we, again, internally heal those wounds, the more collectively our consciousness is going to rise and we are going to see the effects of that. The more people heal, the more people see that we don't want what has been anymore, and we want to choose something different.

The more we are again creating a new world within us, inside first, and then birthing it out into 3D world.

A lot of people are saying we're moving into 5D, so I don't really know what 5D is going to look like, but we are creating 5D and making that leap so that we create a whole new world that we all get to live in. How cool is that? So I think I will end with a grounding.

I meant to do this at the beginning, so hopefully I'll remember to do that next time, but I'll end with it. So again, the symbol of the priestess, one of them at least, is the solar cross.

So we have above, below, and then horizontal, our connection to all living things on Earth. So if you wanna close your eyes and really just feel your energy flowing down through your legs, even if you're sitting, that's okay.

Or even laying down, that's okay.

But just thinking of this vertical energy going down, down, down into the Earth, feeling it flowing down your legs, through your feet, through your toes, into the Earth.

And then keeping that there, keeping the energy grounded in the Earth, but then bringing energy up through your solar plexus, through your chest, through your throat, through your got stuck on my microphone, through through your third eye, through the crown of your head, and up into the cosmos. And so you're gonna feel that suspension in your spine, feeling yourself connected to the cosmos and to the Earth at the same time.

And once you have been able to feel that suspension, that grounding and being connected to the cosmos, then stretching your awareness and your energy out in the horizontal direction as well.

And knowing that we are one, we are connected to all living things, all beings, all of creation, plants, animals, humans, everything that this Earth has to offer, we are connected. We are all one. We are not separate. We are not separate. We no longer are attached or believe the myth of separation.

And so feeling that vertical and that horizontal at the same time.

And just as the Aries Equinox is the zero point, this point of creation in the Zodiac, the Priestess is also at this zero point, at this point of creation, holding all of the this together and surrendering to it. The heavens, the Earth, everything in between, all living beings, we hold it at the center and we surrender to it.

And we know that this is what will bring us into the light and into the love. With that, I will leave you for today. Again, happy Equinox. I hope you find some way to market and celebrate it for yourself.

And with that, I will just say, please always choose love. And I will see you in my next video or podcast episode. Thank you for being here, beloved, for listening, for choosing this path.

If you want to stay connected and go deeper, I invite you to subscribe to my newsletter.

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It's foundational work for everything we explore here. You can find the link down below in the show Notes Notes until next time. Remember, always choose love.