Why is everyone so tired right now? Not sleepy, world tired. Too much is changing too fast, our minds never come with an off switch, and we stay busy so we don't have to feel it.
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Ask almost anyone how they are this week and listen to the first word. Tired. More than seven in ten American adults feel very tired or exhausted at least some days, and nine in ten adults in Britain felt high stress or pressure in the past year. Alvin Toffler saw it coming in 1970, before phones in our pockets and news all day long. Your body can be on the sofa while your mind is still on its feet, keeping watch. Busy works like a painkiller, so the moment we stop, it all arrives at once. We can't slow the world down, so I talk about a word I don't think I've ever used on this podcast. Awe. When we feel small in a good way, our worries get smaller too. Months after I broke my neck, they pushed me outside for fifteen minutes. All I could see was a car park, but the cold air on my lungs, wow. I went back to bed and slept for 24 hours.
One thing to try: This week, spend one minute with something bigger than you. The sky, the sea, an old tree, or the dust dancing in a patch of sunlight. Don't name it, don't fix it. Just look, and let it be big.
Kasia, Jane, Christine, Danielle, Lindsey, Katherine, Vicki, Fiona, Rebecca and Lorna. A warm welcome to Raquel and Jane, my newest monthly supporters, and thank you to Jenna and Mia for raising theirs.
The companion meditation: Wisdom Within the Storm: A Meditation for Chaotic Times
Support the podcast and join the Weekly Calm: stevenwebb.uk
Thank you for listening.
Steven
Links to Steven Webb's podcast and how you can support his work.
Ask almost anyone how they are this week, then listen to the first word they say.
Steven Webb:Most I've spoken to have said this week they're tired.
Steven Webb:Not sleepy, not the kind of tired that after a long walk or a run or a day in the garden, but world-tired.
Steven Webb:Mentally tired, I suppose.
Steven Webb:The kind that a night's sleep doesn't even touch So the last time we talked about the news and how to
Steven Webb:care without drowning.
Steven Webb:This time, I want to ask a bigger question, the question underneath it: Why is everybody so damn tired
Steven Webb:at the moment?
Steven Webb:Hi, I'm Steven Webb, and this is Stillness in the Storms, the podcast that helps you through difficult
Steven Webb:times.
Steven Webb:This is really part two of A Tired World.
Steven Webb:Part One was about the news, and if you missed it, you can just go back one episode.
Steven Webb:And today, I'm going to use the word I don't think I've used on this podcast.
Steven Webb:And I'll tell you what that word is a little later.
Steven Webb:Do you know what?
Steven Webb:First of all, you're not imagining it.
Steven Webb:In America, the CDC asked adults how often they felt very tired or exhausted in the last three months.
Steven Webb:More than seven in ten of them said yes, at least some days.
Steven Webb:And about one in six said most days or every single day.
Steven Webb:In Britain, a charity called Mental Health UK asked about stress.
Steven Webb:Nine in ten adults said they felt high stress or extreme pressure or some kind of stress in the past year.
Steven Webb:Nine in ten.
Steven Webb:Some of you are tired for body reasons.
Steven Webb:An illness, a pain, poor sleep, looking after someone, grief.
Steven Webb:That's real.
Steven Webb:but this talk isn't saying it's all in your head.
Steven Webb:That's a slightly different thing.
Steven Webb:If you've been worn out for weeks, please go and see a doctor.
Steven Webb:What I'm talking about today is the extra tiredness, the kind the world piles on top.
Steven Webb:So why now?
Steven Webb:Well, there was a writer called Alvin Toffler, and it was back in 1970, before I was born, he wrote a
Steven Webb:book called Future Shock And what he said is, "When things change too much, too quickly, people get worn
Steven Webb:out."
Steven Webb:And that was in 1970.
Steven Webb:Nobody had a phone in their pockets.
Steven Webb:Nobody had 24-hour news then.
Steven Webb:Nobody had a constant connected world.
Steven Webb:Now think about this year.
Steven Webb:Prices, work, computers that can write and draw and talk and talk back to you, and, you know, we've got
Steven Webb:the strange weather, we've got angry politics, we've got...
Steven Webb:And then you have the personal things, your bills, your work.
Steven Webb:Ugh, it just, everything adds up.
Steven Webb:Your car breaks down, and you got a birthday to organise.
Steven Webb:It's just...
Steven Webb:I only say a birthday to organise because I met my daughter yesterday, and she said, "We've got to organise
Steven Webb:Koa's birthday."
Steven Webb:So we're gonna do that.
Steven Webb:If you're listening to the podcast, Kim, I have emailed the town clerk about renting a space.
Steven Webb:But there's also those 10 jobs on your to-do list that you haven't done.
Steven Webb:Any of those we could cope with.
Steven Webb:All of them, all at once, all year is a lot.
Steven Webb:We can't do it.
Steven Webb:And here's the part that's easy to miss.
Steven Webb:You don't have to be rushing about to be worn out.
Steven Webb:Your body can be on the sofa, and your mind can still be on its feet, rushing around.
Steven Webb:Keeping watch, checking the road ahead, what's coming next, what if it goes wrong?
Steven Webb:The watching never clocks off anymore, and it's tiring, even when you're sitting still doing nothing.
Steven Webb:There's a polling company called Ipsos.
Steven Webb:Since 1997, they've asked people in Britain if they fear that new technology is destroying our lives.
Steven Webb:This year, more than six in 10 said yes.
Steven Webb:The highest it's ever been.
Steven Webb:So it isn't only you.
Steven Webb:There's a lot of us that are bracing ourselves.
Steven Webb:You know, just with the AI, it's just you can't keep up.
Steven Webb:And I'm trying to embrace it, but I just can't keep up.
Steven Webb:It's too much for me.
Steven Webb:And there's one more sneaky thing.
Steven Webb:Being busy works a bit like a painkiller.
Steven Webb:While we rush about, we can't feel how tired we are.
Steven Webb:Then we stop, and then it all arrives at once.
Steven Webb:I think that's why so many of us just, we just don't dare to stop.
Steven Webb:If we do stop, we think it's just gonna pile up behind us, and we're just terrified of doing it.
Steven Webb:So there's the answer, all three parts of it.
Steven Webb:Too much is changing too fast.
Steven Webb:Our minds never come with an off switch, and we stay busy so we don't have to feel it.
Steven Webb:So what do we do?
Steven Webb:Slow the world down?
Steven Webb:Well, I've got a meditation for that.
Steven Webb:You know, stop the world, I wanna get off.
Steven Webb:We can't.
Steven Webb:I've often really wanted it.
Steven Webb:If there was such a superpower, the superpower that I want is to freeze the world, let me catch up a little
Steven Webb:bit, and then unfreeze the world once I've just caught up.
Steven Webb:You know, even if it's just a simple, "Let me catch up on my emails."
Steven Webb:somebody says to me now at work or someone, "What are you doing at the weekend?"
Steven Webb:And I say, "Well, I got a quiet weekend."
Steven Webb:And they go, "Oh, that's good.
Steven Webb:What you doing?"
Steven Webb:"Catching up on emails."
Steven Webb:Yeah, that's my quiet weekend.
Steven Webb:And I think we're all the same.
Steven Webb:We're all, just trying to catch up with stuff.
Steven Webb:We're spending our lives fully on catch up at the moment.
Steven Webb:And years ago, you took 100, 150 years ago, they would come in from the farm or come in from what they
Steven Webb:were doing and work, and they didn't have the TV, they didn't have these other things, so they sat down
Steven Webb:and read a book.
Steven Webb:They sat at the table, they had a conversation, they stopped and they rested.
Steven Webb:They went for a walk.
Steven Webb:They took notice of nature.
Steven Webb:We just don't seem to be doing any of that anymore So what do we do?
Steven Webb:Slow the world down?
Steven Webb:We can't, like I've just said.
Steven Webb:And I've talked about a rest a lot this year.
Steven Webb:Rest is good.
Steven Webb:Rest matters.
Steven Webb:But today I want to try something different.
Steven Webb:So here's the word awe, A-W-E.
Steven Webb:Awe is the feeling when something is so big or so beautiful or so good that you just stop and stare.
Steven Webb:Your mouth falls open a little, you go quiet, and you feel small in a good way.
Steven Webb:You know, whether it's the night sky or the sea or a massive field, you're like, "Ah, I'm just here."
Steven Webb:The storm over the water, you know, those kind of things.
Steven Webb:Why would that help a tired mind?
Steven Webb:Well, because when we feel small in a good way, our worries get smaller, too.
Steven Webb:For a moment, they don't vanish, but they stop filling the whole room.
Steven Webb:Scientists have been looking into this for a long time.
Steven Webb:One of them, Dacher Keltner, collected stories of awe from people in 26 countries, 2,600 of them in total.
Steven Webb:I didn't finish the book, but I finished a lot of them.
Steven Webb:And what was the most common thing that it brought out?
Steven Webb:Not mountains, not sunsets.
Steven Webb:Other people, their kindness, their courage And there was a study in America in 2020.
Steven Webb:60 older adults, once a week for eight weeks, they took 15-minute walks, and they were asked to look at
Steven Webb:things that filled them with wonder.
Steven Webb:And as the weeks went by, they felt more joy and less everyday worry And if I remember, they took selfies
Steven Webb:too.
Steven Webb:And as the weeks went by, they took up less of the picture and they smiled more.
Steven Webb:They showed more of the world behind them.
Steven Webb:Now, it was a small study.
Steven Webb:I'm not saying it's magic, but I think it's telling us something Now, and I know a little about this and
Steven Webb:a little bit about awe.
Steven Webb:When I broke my neck, I spent months indoors, the same ceiling, the same ward, no fresh air at all.
Steven Webb:And then the very first time that I was actually got out of bed, I was only out of bed for 15 minutes.
Steven Webb:That's all I was allowed.
Steven Webb:And they pushed me outside.
Steven Webb:I wanted to stay out way longer, and they pushed me outside, and it was, I think it was late.
Steven Webb:it was really cold anyway.
Steven Webb:I can't remember exactly which month it was off the top of my head.
Steven Webb:And I went outside and all I could see in front of me was a car park.
Steven Webb:But the cold air on my lungs, that was like, wow And in that moment, the worries of being paralysed for
Steven Webb:the rest of my life, the worries of I'm not gonna walk, what's gonna happen?
Steven Webb:How's my life gonna be?
Steven Webb:Just all vanished.
Steven Webb:And for days and weeks, that moment stayed with me.
Steven Webb:I wanted more of that moment And I went back to bed on cue, I think it was about 20 minutes, and I was
Steven Webb:ready.
Steven Webb:I went back to bed, and I slept for 24 hours.
Steven Webb:It was the first time that I truly relaxed, albeit I've been lying in bed with a mind racing for months
Steven Webb:and months and months.
Steven Webb:Yeah.
Steven Webb:Find that awe moment sometimes, even if it's just seeing a butterfly land somewhere.
Steven Webb:Even if it's just, you know, seeing a, wave break or whatever's near you.
Steven Webb:Find that awe moment And I think what was more magic about that is that it was a car park, but the air
Steven Webb:was crisp and the sky was blue, and that feeling.
Steven Webb:So it doesn't have to be anywhere amazing, or it doesn't have to be a mountain or a lake And just a another
Steven Webb:quick one.
Steven Webb:In the museum in Truro, there's some gold necklaces made 4,000 years ago right here in Cornwall.
Steven Webb:Every time I see them, I'm a trustee of a museum, so a bit of a plug here, but every time I see them,
Steven Webb:they're so ornate and beautiful, I just think, 4,000 years ago.
Steven Webb:That's 2,000 years before Jesus.
Steven Webb:Come on.
Steven Webb:If that doesn't strike you as something incredible I'll post a picture.
Steven Webb:I'll send the picture in my Weekly Calm this week because that's something special And it's these little
Steven Webb:moments that you remember as time goes on.
Steven Webb:This podcast's moved to little moments, but it's really important.
Steven Webb:And remember that Dacher Keltner found the most common awes were from other people The time someone's
Steven Webb:kindness was kind, someone that smiled, someone that opened the door, someone that pointed something out.
Steven Webb:We don't have to climb anything.
Steven Webb:We can just notice sometimes a neighbour carrying someone's shopping, a stranger holding a door, someone
Steven Webb:who keeps going with a smile when you can see that it's hard.
Steven Webb:That counts, too.
Steven Webb:That's awe, too So now the practice.
Steven Webb:It takes one minute, and you can do it today.
Steven Webb:Pick one thing that's bigger than you.
Steven Webb:The sky, the sea, an old tree, the stairs of an old building.
Steven Webb:Whatever it is, go and find it.
Steven Webb:Can't get out?
Steven Webb:That's fine.
Steven Webb:Look out of a window Or just find a patch of sunlight and watch the dust floating You know, even the dust
Steven Webb:jump around in a little shiny bit of light A tiny speck of dust dancing in the sun is an amazing thing
Steven Webb:if you just let it be So just one minute That's your task this week.
Steven Webb:That's what I'd like you to do.
Steven Webb:And let me know in the reviews or let me know by messaging me.
Steven Webb:I always read them all.
Steven Webb:And wherever you are, just look up or look out and find that, something that's a bit bigger or older or
Steven Webb:finer, and just let it be.
Steven Webb:You don't even have to name it.
Steven Webb:Don't fix it.
Steven Webb:Don't do anything about it.
Steven Webb:Just look But notice how small you feel next to it.
Steven Webb:It's not about feeling insignificant.
Steven Webb:It's about seeing the big picture and seeing how incredible it is beyond all the politics and the bickering
Steven Webb:and the worries and the things you gotta do, your little to-do list And then you can ask yourself, what
Steven Webb:do this week's worries look like compared to this?
Steven Webb:It might not shrink or it might not make a huge difference, but in time it will.
Steven Webb:And Marcus Aurelius, the Emperor of Rome, just what, nearly 2,000 years ago, he notes to himself in his
Steven Webb:Meditations, and we still read them today.
Steven Webb:I love his book.
Steven Webb:And if you're gonna pick up the Meditations, pick up the Gregory Hays translation.
Steven Webb:It makes it so much easier.
Steven Webb:But in Meditations 4.24, he says two lines from the same passage.
Steven Webb:He wrote, "Most of what we say and do is not essential.
Steven Webb:Ask yourself at every moment, 'Is this necessary?'" The irony.
Steven Webb:I'm here talking into a podcast now, but it's true.
Steven Webb:He wasn't saying stop.
Steven Webb:He wasn't saying do less.
Steven Webb:He was saying do it better.
Steven Webb:We can't slow the world down, but we can choose what gets our attention.
Steven Webb:And even if it's only for a minute Look, before I go, thank you.
Steven Webb:This stays free 'cause of a few people that buy me a coffee or give a little each month.
Steven Webb:Thank you to Kasia, Jane, Christine, Danielle, Lindsey, Katherine, Vicki, Fiona, Rebecca, and Lorna.
Steven Webb:You're all awesome.
Steven Webb:Thank you very much.
Steven Webb:And there's a few anonymous supporters.
Steven Webb:Thank you to you, too.
Steven Webb:And a warm welcome to Raquel and Jane.
Steven Webb:You've become monthly supporters.
Steven Webb:And I do have to give a little shout-out to Jenna and Mia.
Steven Webb:You've just raised yours, so thank you so much.
Steven Webb:You're all awesome.
Steven Webb:You're awesome for just listening and getting this far in the podcast.
Steven Webb:You know, it wouldn't be here without you, and it'd be full of adverts or not exist.
Steven Webb:So...
Steven Webb:And if you'd like to join them or just fancy sending me a message with an idea of a podcast or anything,
Steven Webb:just go to stevenwebb.uk, spelt with a V.
Steven Webb:There's courses there, too, that you can choose how much to pay.
Steven Webb:And I've been working on a new course for a while now, but it's nearly ready.
Steven Webb:And here's the thing I'd like you to try this week.
Steven Webb:Just spend one minute occasionally.
Steven Webb:Just find something and you go, "Wow."
Steven Webb:Find something you're in awe of.
Steven Webb:Look out for something big or old or just something kind, and let it be big.
Steven Webb:Let it be the big occasion.
Steven Webb:Let it fill your heart with what it is.
Steven Webb:So when the world feels too loud, you'll have somewhere to go just one minute away And if you'd like some
Steven Webb:company with that, this meditation that goes with this one is Wisdom Within the Storm.
Steven Webb:That's out on Inner Peace Meditations.
Steven Webb:Have a listen just when you can So here's my question for you this week.
Steven Webb:What's the last thing that made you stop and stare?
Steven Webb:I'd love to know.
Steven Webb:Reply on this video or reply on the podcast, or anywhere in your comments on Spotify or in the reviews
Steven Webb:on Apple.
Steven Webb:We can't slow the world down, but we can let it be big in a good way.
Steven Webb:And sometimes the big world is the very thing that makes our worries small enough to carry And finally,
Steven Webb:if this does help at all, send it to someone that looks a bit worn out this week or someone that when
Steven Webb:you asked how they were just said, "I'm tired."
Steven Webb:Take care of yourself and each other, and I love you