Episode Summary

In this episode, I reflect on Jason Hillman’s powerful presentation about trauma from a national education conference in Las Vegas. Rather than building his session around a framework or school improvement strategy, Jason shared his family’s deeply personal experiences with breast cancer, his own health challenges, and his daughter’s eating disorder.

His story reminds us that trauma does not only affect students. Trauma impacts teachers, administrators, parents, families, and entire communities. What we see on the outside may be connected to grief, fear, stress, or pain that remains invisible to those around us.

I explore several important takeaways from Jason’s session, including the idea that behavior often has a backstory, invisible struggles are still real, relationships can become lifelines, and empathy and expectations can coexist. Understanding trauma does not require educators to abandon accountability. It helps us provide accountability with greater compassion and support.

The episode concludes with a personal story about a teacher from my childhood who was undergoing cancer treatment and a lesson my mom taught me: all people have problems. We may never fully know what another person is carrying, but remembering that reality can change how we teach, lead, and respond to others.

Show Notes

• Jason Hillman’s personal presentation about trauma
• Trauma’s impact on students, adults, and families
• Why behavior often has a backstory
• The reality of invisible struggles
• Grief and how it changes people
• Relationships as lifelines during difficult seasons
• The positive and negative influence of one person
• Balancing empathy with expectations
• How resilience can be developed
• Schools as places of safety, consistency, and healing
• A childhood lesson about compassion

Key Takeaways

• Behavior often has a backstory.
• Trauma affects adults and families as well as students.
• Invisible struggles are still real.
• Grief can change how people experience and respond to the world.
• Relationships can become lifelines during difficult seasons.
• One caring person can have an enormous positive influence.
• One unhealthy relationship can also leave lasting wounds.
• Empathy and accountability can coexist.
• Resilience can grow through relationships, support, hope, and perseverance.
• Understanding someone’s story can change how we teach and lead.

This is Mr. Funky Teacher with BeAFunkyTeacher.com. I’m coming to you with another Be a Funky Teacher podcast.

Welcome back, everyone.

Today’s episode is called Jason Hillman: The Impact of Trauma — A Personal Story.

It’s my takeaways from a national education conference in Las Vegas.

One of the most powerful sessions I attended during the conference wasn’t built around a framework, a chart, or a school improvement plan.

It was built around a story.

Jason Hillman shared a deeply personal story about trauma and how difficult experiences impacted his family.

He talked about his wife’s battle with breast cancer.

He talked about health challenges of his own.

He talked about his daughter’s eating disorder and the emotional toll those experiences took on the people he loves most.

As educators, we often talk about trauma in terms of students.

But Jason reminded us that trauma impacts everyone.

Students.

Parents.

Teachers.

Administrators.

Families.

Human beings.

As I listened to his story, I found myself reflecting on my own experiences with grief, challenges, difficult situations, and the people who have shaped my family’s journey—both positively and negatively.

I kept coming back to one simple thought.

Behavior often has a backstory.

Before we get into it, let’s ground ourselves in gratitude.

Here are three things that I’m thankful for.

The first thing I’m thankful for is school secretaries.

They answer questions.

They solve problems.

They support families.

They help staff members.

They often keep schools running smoothly behind the scenes.

The second thing I’m thankful for is campfires.

There’s something special about gathering around a fire, sharing stories, laughing, reflecting, and connecting with people we care about.

The third thing I’m thankful for is teachers who never gave up on difficult students.

I’m thankful for educators who looked beyond behaviors and saw the person underneath.

Those teachers often change lives in ways they may never fully realize.

Well, let’s get back into the main topic.

The topic, once again, is Jason Hillman: The Impact of Trauma — A Personal Story.

It’s my takeaways from a national education conference in Las Vegas.

When educators hear the word trauma, it’s easy to immediately think about student behavior.

We wonder why students act a certain way.

Why they struggle.

Why they withdraw.

Why they react.

Those questions matter.

But Jason challenged us to look deeper.

Because behavior doesn’t happen in a vacuum.

People carry experiences.

People carry grief.

People carry stress.

People carry fears.

People carry wounds.

Sometimes what we see on the outside is connected to something happening on the inside.

That doesn’t mean we lower expectations.

It means we lead with understanding.

So let’s explore some of the biggest takeaways from this session.

The first big idea is that behavior often has a backstory.

One of the biggest lessons from Jason’s presentation was that behavior often has a backstory.

We see actions, but we don’t always see experiences.

We see reactions, but we don’t always see the pain behind them.

Understanding that reality helps us respond with greater empathy.

Another big idea is that trauma impacts more than students.

Trauma is often discussed in relation to children, but trauma impacts adults too.

Teachers experience trauma.

Parents experience trauma.

Families experience trauma.

Leaders experience trauma.

Recognizing that reality helps us better understand one another.

Grief also changes people.

As Jason shared his family’s story, I found myself reflecting on losing my own mom.

Grief changes us.

It changes how we see the world.

It changes how we process experiences.

It changes how we interact with others.

People carrying grief need compassion, patience, and support.

There can be grief connected to death and loss, but there are also many other reasons someone might be carrying grief.

Another big idea is that invisible struggles are still real.

This is something we have to remain aware of.

One of the biggest challenges with trauma is that much of it remains unseen.

Students may look fine.

Teachers may look fine.

Parents may look fine.

But appearances don’t always tell the full story.

Some of the biggest battles people fight are invisible to everyone around them.

That’s something we have to remember.

Invisible struggles are still real.

We should keep our eyes open for the little hints or clues that someone may be struggling.

But much of it might remain invisible.

Sometimes the struggles of a child—or the struggles involving their own child—may be invisible.

That was part of Jason’s story too.

Another big idea is that relationships become lifelines when people go through difficult seasons.

Relationships matter.

Families matter.

Friends matter.

Colleagues matter.

Mentors matter.

Coaches matter.

Healthy relationships often become the support systems that help people keep moving forward.

Another big idea is that one person can have an enormous impact.

As I listened to Jason, I found myself thinking about something I’ve learned throughout life.

One person can have an enormous positive impact.

A caring teacher.

A supportive coach.

A mentor.

A trusted friend.

A family member.

One person can help someone believe in themselves.

Unfortunately, the opposite can also be true.

One toxic relationship can leave lasting wounds.

One hurtful experience can impact confidence.

One unhealthy influence can affect a person’s well-being.

That’s why relationships matter so much.

We often have more influence than we realize.

Another big idea is that empathy and expectations can coexist.

Understanding trauma does not mean abandoning expectations.

Students still need accountability.

Students still need support.

Students still need growth.

The goal is not to excuse behavior.

The goal is to understand behavior while helping students move forward.

Another big idea is that resilience can be developed.

One thing I appreciate about stories like Jason’s is that they remind us that people can overcome incredibly difficult circumstances.

Resilience doesn’t mean life is easy.

Resilience means people continue moving forward despite challenges.

Resilience can be strengthened through relationships, support, hope, and perseverance.

Another big idea is that schools can be places of healing.

Schools cannot solve every problem.

How could they?

But schools can be places where students feel safe.

Where students feel valued.

Where students experience consistency.

Where students encounter caring adults.

Sometimes that stability becomes incredibly important in a young person’s life.

The final big idea is that understanding people’s stories changes how we lead.

Perhaps that’s actually the biggest lesson I took from Jason’s presentation.

People’s stories matter.

The more we understand someone’s story, the more effectively we can support them.

The more we understand someone’s experiences, the more compassion we can show.

The more we understand someone’s struggles, the better equipped we are to help.

We don’t need to know every detail of someone’s life.

But we should remember that everyone is carrying something.

That reality should shape how we lead, teach, and serve others.

I can’t help but think about a big lesson my mom taught me growing up.

She taught me that all people have problems.

That doesn’t mean we dismiss people by saying, “Well, everyone has problems.”

It means recognizing that everyone has problems helps us show up for people differently.

Maybe someone is acting a certain way because of something they’ve experienced.

Maybe it’s something they’re going through right now.

I’ll never forget a teacher I had growing up.

She was a grumpy teacher.

I couldn’t understand why she was so grumpy.

I remember my mom saying, “Hey, you be nice to her. You don’t know what she’s going through in her life.”

It turned out she was going through cancer treatment.

She didn’t feel good.

She still had to be at school.

She didn’t have the sick days to stay home.

She had to be at school, even though she didn’t feel like being there.

She didn’t need me being disrespectful.

She didn’t need other students being disrespectful.

She needed us to do the best we could and help her get through the day, knowing that she didn’t feel well.

But I didn’t know what was happening.

I learned later that she was fighting for her life.

That made the lesson my mom was teaching me very real.

All people have problems.

I think encountering that teacher—thinking she was just a grumpy teacher and then realizing that she was fighting for her life—helped me understand that lesson.

My mom told me, “You be nice to her. You don’t know what’s going on in her life. Maybe she’s just a jerk, but maybe—just maybe—she’s going through something you can’t possibly imagine.”

That has stuck with me.

I think it has made me a more empathetic and compassionate person.

Well, as I do a reflective close on Jason Hillman’s presentation, I think the reason his session resonated so deeply with me is because it felt real.

It wasn’t a presentation built around perfect answers.

It was a session built around real life.

Real challenges.

Real struggles.

Real people.

As he shared his family’s experiences, I found myself thinking about my own family.

I thought about grief after losing my mom.

I thought about health challenges.

I thought about difficult situations that impacted people I love.

I thought about how much influence people can have on one another—for better or worse.

That reminder matters because, as educators, we interact with people every day.

Students.

Parents.

Colleagues.

Families.

Every one of them is carrying a story we may never fully know.

My challenge for you is simple.

The next time someone frustrates you, puzzles you, or challenges you, ask yourself this question:

What story might I not know?

You may never get the full answer.

But asking the question can help us respond with greater compassion, understanding, and grace.

Sometimes that makes all the difference.

Well, if you found value in this episode, head over to Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to your podcasts and hit me up with a five-star review and let me know what you think.

It helps more teachers find this space.

As you go into your day, I want you to remember to inspire greatness in young people.

And don’t forget to be a funky teacher.

Bye now.