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Ep.5 Are you good at taking care of yourself in times of change and distress? w/ Troy Vincent
Episode 520th December 2021 • The Borealis Experience • Aurora Eggert
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In times of change and distress:

Can you be your best friend ? 

Being patient with yourself?

Believing in yourself?

Holding space for your emotions and not judging yourself ?

I feel this is the hardest thing to do at times.

It is so easy to give into fears and judgement and self loathing 

It is so convenient to stay in your comfort zone and to bitch about how things are not awesome in your life

I feel so blessed to have met Troy Vincent and to learn more about his story and journey. 

I’m so excited to post today’s episode because I know that his vibe and how he chooses to approach challenging thoughts and decisions will deeply inspire and empower you 

With much love 

A.

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Free yourself from the ongoing destructive inner chatter become the strongest most authentic version of yourself.





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Transcripts

Unknown:

Hello, hello, and welcome to the Borealis

Unknown:

experience. I'm so excited to be spending some time with Troy

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Vincent today. It is an incredible story that he will

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share with us. And yeah, we just had a chat the other day and I

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felt the need to interview Troy because I know

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his story will bring a lot of hope and light and Kurt to

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people. And we just can't have enough of this right now,

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especially before Christmas. Troy, thank you so much for

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making the time to be here with us today.

Unknown:

Yeah, do you want to dive in and share with us what your last 10

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days looked like a little bit to invite to your life?

Unknown:

Well, thanks for having me, Aurora. As you gave me the

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introduction there. I'm like, Who's she going to talk to this

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guy? Sounds interesting. That's not me.

Unknown:

Yeah, I guess the last few days, or the last week and a half was

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kind of

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a lot of things brewing up towards it, of course is that's

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what happens with change.

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A journey that began about three years ago and really ramped it

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up into this year with just you know, a lot of self development

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and self care, focus.

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really studying

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the psychology of, of happiness, and

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she's a Madonna, blank now, mindset and grow meditation,

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positive psychology, just a whole array of stuff that I dove

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into just for my own self purposes.

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And then, as my journey went along, I discovered something

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called Life Coaching, which I'd never heard of, and it's been

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around for forever.

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I met up with a life coach who introduced me to neuro

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linguistic programming, which is NLP. And some people might be

Unknown:

very familiar with that. Tony Robbins is one of the big names

Unknown:

behind NLP. He's, he's utilizes it. And so I actually went to

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Arizona, week and a half ago to do some training for four days,

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extensive intensive training

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10 hours a day.

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And just to learn a lot of different things about, you

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know, the brain and, and our language that we use, that we

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use and how powerful it is.

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And, yeah, and within one of the techniques that I was learning,

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I've been feeling a calling of becoming a life coach and

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helping connect with people in such a deeper way than I have

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via my soon to be old job, which is radio. And the aspect of

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radio that I do love is a way to connect with people. But this is

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far deeper. And so one of the techniques allowed me to kind of

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ask the question, is it time to let go of radio and move on to

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something else, like live coaching? And yeah, it just

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really, really resonated, spoke to me, kind of midway through

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the technique. It's like, I didn't have to finish it.

Unknown:

Aurora. So it's like, This is it? It's time. I gotta, I gotta

Unknown:

go dive into this. So oh, I don't have anything in front of

Unknown:

me planned whatsoever. Great. Yeah, but my salary, start from

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zero and dive in. And so I came back from from that conference.

Unknown:

I handed in my resignation to my boss.

Unknown:

Wow. That is so I mean, there's lots of people who have done

Unknown:

that during the last two years here.

Unknown:

But you've been in your job for so many years. And I don't know

Unknown:

a voice a voice carries so far like you've been in people's

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hearts and people's souls in people's minds, like through the

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radio station.

Unknown:

And it must have been hard at the same time to resign and to

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say, okay, like, this is it now.

Unknown:

But as you're very excited for this next journey,

Unknown:

it's not that painful, but it's still Yeah, it's a chapter that

Unknown:

needs closure. And how do you say that in English it

Unknown:

the time that you spent on the radio have really Yeah. formed

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your character and helped you grow

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as well.

Unknown:

Absolutely. Hi, I was, uh, I was always a shy kid growing up, you

Unknown:

know?

Unknown:

And a really great listener, if you were to ask my friends from

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school,

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if you were to tell them I got into radio, they'd be like,

Unknown:

What? No, he doesn't talk for he wouldn't talk for a living, he

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would listen for a living. So yeah, it gave me a chance to

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find my voice. And, and really craft that. And so I'm very

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grateful for radio for that, because I was kind of born with

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the listening skills. It's just a matter of finding my voice.

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And now, I'm able to combine both into the next path that I

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want to take. And so that's really, really great. And, you

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know, 23 years later, I actually started off in radio, by

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accident. I didn't go to school for it. I didn't even grow up

Unknown:

listening to radio.

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I did it for the most noble of reasons. Aurora, in university

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here in Lethbridge, there was a very pretty girl named Dana, who

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asked me and my buddy if we wanted to do a radio show, and

Unknown:

we said, Yes. And then we met started making a pact with each

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other. Because we decided she's going to, she's going to fall in

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love with one of us, clearly. And so we made a pact that we

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wouldn't get mad

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if she chose the other person. And then we showed up the very

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next day, to a meeting at the radio station. And she

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introduced us to her very cool, very tall, very tough boyfriend.

Unknown:

And we were stuck with a radio show. And, but it was great. I

Unknown:

dove into that.

Unknown:

And yeah, it kind of just accidentally blossomed into a

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career that I didn't

Unknown:

even want to jump into right away. I just thought I'll try

Unknown:

this until it stops being fun.

Unknown:

And now 23 years have gone by.

Unknown:

And I think it's finally time it's finally time so yeah,

Unknown:

caught me off guard caught me by surprise. And it's been

Unknown:

quite an interesting journey. They're starting off with

Unknown:

someone who really wasn't that good at talking at all. Yeah.

Unknown:

Oh, man. So that means your personality your soul loves

Unknown:

challenges. And now you're bestest equipped for for your

Unknown:

new job that you're gonna tackle, he assumed. Now let me

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ask you, when it comes to coaching, especially life

Unknown:

coaching.

Unknown:

I feel we all have a story to share that we all have a story

Unknown:

of pain, sometimes even drama to share. We went through some

Unknown:

stuff, and learned how to help ourselves. My listeners know my

Unknown:

story a little bit and how I became a podcaster and a life

Unknown:

coach. But how is it for you like, was it always, you know,

Unknown:

this self awareness and, and understanding relationship

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dynamics come easy to you? Or did you have to learn it the

Unknown:

hard way?

Unknown:

What was your journey that led to to wanting to become a life

Unknown:

coach? Yeah, you said you are.

Unknown:

You're passionate about what you're learning right now. But

Unknown:

on a on a soul level on an emotional level? What went on

Unknown:

there? Yeah. Yeah.

Unknown:

I remember from all the stuff that I've been kind of studying

Unknown:

over the last year, especially with the last two years, friends

Unknown:

started telling me Ah, become a therapist. And I was like, No, I

Unknown:

don't want to go back to school that long. But you know, cool,

Unknown:

cool idea.

Unknown:

I like helping people, you know, I've been in pain and you want

Unknown:

to help others

Unknown:

alleviated of it, and help elevate others. And then I

Unknown:

discovered life coaching. And

Unknown:

I discovered it through a friend who actually experienced

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something called M E R. And that's

Unknown:

mental and emotional release. And it's a technique that's kind

Unknown:

of tethered into NLP.

Unknown:

And I saw such a huge change for someone who is battling so much

Unknown:

depression. And I kind of find out what this is. Because even

Unknown:

though all the work I was doing, to, you know,

Unknown:

deal with my baggage and try to read rediscover myself, after

Unknown:

being in a relationship where it was, I became too codependent.

Unknown:

Like we just by accident, we got along so well. We've just lost

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ourselves. And so it was time for self discovery.

Unknown:

And so I went and visited this life coach, and I learned about

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ner and I said, Yes, I want to do this. And it's an intensive

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kind of two day process.

Unknown:

Nothing too invasive or anything like that. It's not like you got

Unknown:

to go to a therapist and you know, spill out your heart or

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anything like that.

Unknown:

It's just a lot of language and visual techniques and connecting

Unknown:

with your unconscious mind. And it seems so simple and that it

Unknown:

shouldn't work, but it totally works. And when it did,

Unknown:

from that moment on, am I, this is a miracle. And this is what I

Unknown:

want to do. This is what I want to do right here, I want to help

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people overcome all of their baggage stuff that they might

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not even know about, that's just kind of sitting in your

Unknown:

unconscious mind. And really kind of holding us back in a lot

Unknown:

of ways creating limiting beliefs,

Unknown:

creating a lot of fear and doubt. And when I experienced

Unknown:

that it was is,

Unknown:

I guess the way to liken it to one thing is like, we all can

Unknown:

overreact at something. And when we do, it's because it's a tie,

Unknown:

it's it's attached to baggage. So if you get angry at

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something, and you should be reacting, like a three out of 10

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on a scale, but you react like six, you know, your your people

Unknown:

would be like, Well, jeez, you're really ticked off about

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this, but it's not you're, you're actually bringing in old

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baggage into this into that situation. But once you do this

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process, it's done is gone. And so from that moment on, like,

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you know, when you get mad at something, you're like, This is

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authentic. Like this is authentic frustration in this

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very moment you feel so present. And when we're present, we

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were elevated, and we have a chance to

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be more happy beer and being engaged in our world. And so

Unknown:

it's just a miracle thing. And so as soon as I did that, I said

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I got to learn this. And so going to that NLP conference

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where I did on Arizona, that was step one. And now step two will

Unknown:

be for me to go to one in the new year. And, and I want to be

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able to kind of help alleviate this for other people. And the

Unknown:

things I've seen people overcome with it are just

Unknown:

really great.

Unknown:

They did a

Unknown:

they did

Unknown:

an experiment, I guess if that would be a test. Well, they had

Unknown:

like a depression clinic, right? I believe this was down in the

Unknown:

States. And they had X amount of people who were battling

Unknown:

depression. And they had a certain sort of treatment that

Unknown:

they had. And it was really good. They had like 70%

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effective rate where they'd help people get over their

Unknown:

depression.

Unknown:

And I think it was only like 10, maybe 15% Relapse would occur.

Unknown:

So there's pretty good numbers, they're like they're helping

Unknown:

people. Well, then they brought an M er. And they had 100%.

Unknown:

effective rate 0% relapse.

Unknown:

Wow, that's so powerful. In a world where we are getting more

Unknown:

and more in touch with mental health. And the fact that so

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many of us battle it, we all battle in some sort of way,

Unknown:

whether it's small increments, or low scale, human right up to

Unknown:

a high scale. And so

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just to have that and be able to free people from from their

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baggage and what holds them back and just elevate them and send

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them on the way like, it's going to be so amazing. It's it's my

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passion. And it's my purpose. And so I couldn't resist, you

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know, following that dharma. I just had to sit down and go,

Unknown:

yeah, it's time to move on radio, even though it's been

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really good for me and it's a great creative outlet.

Unknown:

People think I'm silly to give up a radio job. But

Unknown:

but this is it. You know, when when you find your next level

Unknown:

passion, you gotta go for it. Yeah, yeah. Ah, this is so

Unknown:

incredibly beautiful. And I'm sure the pharmaceutical

Unknown:

companies will not like to hear this.

Unknown:

Oh, no, you're right. Like, How is this not?

Unknown:

This should be a thing where this should spread like a virus,

Unknown:

right? Like, totally cover the world? Yeah, no, no, no, we have

Unknown:

to, we have to be on a quest. You know, I want to put it in

Unknown:

fairy tale language. It's not about the bad farmer. It's about

Unknown:

the universe wanting us to want to heal. And we have to be on a

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quest. We have to find those tools that can heal us. And when

Unknown:

we are in alignment with that we're going to attract people

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like you into our lives, and then we're going to heal. It's

Unknown:

not going to be in the news. It's not going to be over social

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media. And, yeah, we have to make peace with that because

Unknown:

it's too magical. Just like you say, right? It's, there's no big

Unknown:

trick. There's no magic potion that you have to swallow down.

Unknown:

It's

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just correct me if I'm wrong. It is learning about yourself,

Unknown:

making sense of it and then not being a victim of your past. And

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your little monkey mind that sometimes does

Unknown:

So I had to run through with stuff.

Unknown:

And what's what's incredible is you don't have to like really

Unknown:

struggle to overcome anything. You don't have to be mindful to.

Unknown:

Like you're you're tapping into your unconscious mind, right.

Unknown:

And so even when the whole process is done, you're like,

Unknown:

that's it did it work. But it's only work. I saw a gal. In

Unknown:

Arizona, she was terrified of elevators. Since she was a

Unknown:

little kid, she got trapped in an elevator for like three hours

Unknown:

when she was a kid. And so she never went back into an elevator

Unknown:

ever again. And she lived in Paris, and she never went into

Unknown:

the elevator to go up to the Eiffel Tower.

Unknown:

She was another city that she lived in. She was in a high

Unknown:

rise, she lived like on the 22nd floor.

Unknown:

And she never took the elevator. She took the stairs all the

Unknown:

time. And so she was at this conference with me at this

Unknown:

training. And they did the M er on her. And again, it's not

Unknown:

like, it'd be like a 10 minute process. And it's just a

Unknown:

visualization thing. And sure enough, it's like, okay, how do

Unknown:

you feel about elevators? Like, I'm fine with it? Of course, you

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know what the trainer is like, Well, should we go test this

Unknown:

out. And so a bunch of us, all of us got up and started walking

Unknown:

down the hall of the hotel and right to an elevator she got

Unknown:

inside, I made sure that I snuck my way inside too, because I

Unknown:

wanted to see her in action. See what the experience was like. I

Unknown:

was right beside her. And she, she had the expression on her

Unknown:

face. Like she had been in an elevator every day her entire

Unknown:

life. Like it was the most boring, mundane neutral thing.

Unknown:

It's just like, Yeah, I'm just in an elevator. I'm just going

Unknown:

up to the fourth floor. It's simple as that. And it's just

Unknown:

incredible, because the energy and the expression on her face

Unknown:

when she was sharing her story, like 15 minutes beforehand, you

Unknown:

can see the terror. You know, her body would just shake and

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just ripple and give her shivers when she thought about getting

Unknown:

into an elevator. And then suddenly now it's like, yeah,

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this is a thing. I can just do this now. And it's gone. And all

Unknown:

that phobia is gone. And

Unknown:

I just want to be able to do that for people just to help

Unknown:

alleviate.

Unknown:

Yeah, yeah, it is so crazy, because I feel most of the time,

Unknown:

like we are doing all right, you know, we're fine. We're not in

Unknown:

big pain. But life is not as awesome as it could be. But we

Unknown:

can't really put a finger on it, why? Why we're not more content

Unknown:

or happy. And then a coach like you comes into play. And points

Unknown:

out, Hey, you have limiting beliefs, you still think that

Unknown:

you're not deserving? And that you're not enough? Or you still

Unknown:

think that the traumatic experience from back then is

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supposed to Yeah, limit your beliefs nowadays in order to

Unknown:

keep you safe?

Unknown:

And then all of a sudden, that person realizes, Oh, no, I can

Unknown:

actually let go of all this. And I mean, just for you to witness

Unknown:

that. But for the person now to know that they can actually tap

Unknown:

back into their potential and get closer to their purpose to

Unknown:

what they're meant to.

Unknown:

Yeah. To to what they were meant to accomplish here and do here

Unknown:

on planet Earth. And it's just so yeah, it's so amazing. And

Unknown:

I'm so glad that I met you because

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I feel exactly the same about about this job. And a lot of

Unknown:

times, yeah, coaches feel like Oh, my God, this is gonna be

Unknown:

competition. And I don't want him to, you know, to look at my

Unknown:

book. No. And I want to

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know, this is not how it goes. Because people react to energy.

Unknown:

They're drawn to your energy and then you go from there. Like,

Unknown:

it's

Unknown:

competition is the old way of looking at it and working

Unknown:

together and boosting each other I feel is the new world.

Unknown:

It's,

Unknown:

yeah,

Unknown:

a very, we all can.

Unknown:

We all need, you know, we can all benefit from coaching. I

Unknown:

liked how people will kind of actually had a friend asked me

Unknown:

if I was joining a cult, when I told him what I was going to do.

Unknown:

I was like, what do you what do you think like coaching is, that

Unknown:

was an interesting conversation.

Unknown:

And so people don't have an understanding. Go, it's weird.

Unknown:

They'll understand coaching, have a whole variety of other

Unknown:

things. But then you say life coaching and you're like, what?

Unknown:

Well, life coaching. What's that? Like kind of mind control

Unknown:

manipulation is is is like, No, we're all living. And so this is

Unknown:

like the most important coaching we get

Unknown:

You know, and, and it doesn't matter where you are in your

Unknown:

life, wherever you are on your happiness level, you can always

Unknown:

be a little bit happier. If you have confidence, you can boost

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that whatever it might be, we all have areas that kind of can

Unknown:

sink and we can elevate them and improve upon them. And that's

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what the life coaching is, and

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and people don't quite understand exactly like, you can

Unknown:

have your life together in a lot of ways. It doesn't mean in

Unknown:

fact, the people, the successful people are the ones who get

Unknown:

coaches. Yes, they know. Yeah, they've got they know, mentors,

Unknown:

they get coaching. And so people who aren't successful, and

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they're like, I don't know what this coaching is. And so you

Unknown:

will be successful if you get a coach. Yeah, I mean, the most

Unknown:

successful people have a coach, you know, when when people think

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of even in sports terms, you could take the greatest player

Unknown:

in whatever sport like Tom Brady and football, he has a head

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coach, he's got a offensive coordinator, coach, he's got a

Unknown:

quarterback coach, he's got his own personal trainer for his

Unknown:

body, he's got his coach for his food he's got, he just has so

Unknown:

many coaches in his life. And that's what these successful

Unknown:

people do. They surround themselves with people who can,

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you know, see, because we can't see everything within ourselves

Unknown:

from the, because we're looking outward. And we can't always see

Unknown:

totally inward what other people can see, we don't hear our own

Unknown:

language sometimes. And so you can find really guidance, and

Unknown:

it's not being told what to do. You know, you're being guided,

Unknown:

all the answers are within us. And it's amazing. When you

Unknown:

unleash that and experience it, and that's why you know, me and

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you, we're coaches, and yet we have coaches, because we know it

Unknown:

works, and how powerful it is, oh, yeah, I couldn't do.

Unknown:

There's no way. Like you say, first of all, we don't, we don't

Unknown:

have all the tools, we don't have all the skills. And second

Unknown:

of all, we are human beings who also go through depressive

Unknown:

phases who go through phases of self doubt. And

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yeah, we have to pour our heart out to people that kind of have

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a neutral position and and have interest in mind. And that's

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okay, you, once you accept that, that you can't do it all. And

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that's how it's supposed to be you have to do it as a team.

Unknown:

It's great. As long as you resist it, as long as you think

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no, this is not for me, and I have to struggle, life has to be

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hard.

Unknown:

It's, it's going to be tough. And I feel Yeah, there is people

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that are naturally, like open up to you and learn from you. And

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there's people who are going to be curious, but then they're

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going to find out no, this is too challenging. I can deal with

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uncertainty, I can deal with my own power. That's what I

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discovered is that there's people, you will show them in

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the mirror,

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hey, this is what I see. And you and you claim that power and you

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can achieve this and that and they will be like No, I don't

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want to tap into my energy. I want to stay in victim mentality

Unknown:

and suffer and be in pain. And that, for me is the very hardest

Unknown:

part as a coach to see someone

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choosing to stay in the in the pain zone.

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But I had to learn that everybody heals at their own

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speed. And if they're not ready, nobody, it's nobody's fault.

Unknown:

No, you're right. And it's really tough. Because yeah, we

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do see their potential, we see the potential and everyone and

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and you want to show it to the and if they're not ready to see

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it, that's not going to help or if they're not ready, have you

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experienced this was kind of based on my own observations

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with myself. And then I noticed everyone else in the world kind

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of doing it to like the two phases of change. were,

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you know, that first phase is like, I want to change, I need

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to change, you know. And so you see something in your life,

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you're experiencing something, you're like, something's got to

Unknown:

change, I have to change. And then you don't.

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It's not until you're ready to change that you actually do. And

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that's phase two. And so you come across a lot of people in

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our business who are in phase one, and they're like, Yeah, you

Unknown:

know, I'm, I'm just I'm coming near my wit's end and I just

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things have to be different. And you know, they're sincere, that

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they're very sincere. And so you know, your heart goes out to

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them and you empathize with them.

Unknown:

But then there's that. There's that thing where it's like,

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they're not ready. I remember a story that heard recently I was

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talking to a guy and he's a motivational

Unknown:

Speaker, he was going through a rough patch in his life.

Unknown:

And his mom was on his on her deathbed. And he kind of felt

Unknown:

this guilt, like, oh my goodness, like this wonderful

Unknown:

woman, she adopted him into her, the family, you know, raised him

Unknown:

and took care of them protected him and

Unknown:

he went on to become like an NFL player. And then his career is

Unknown:

over. And his life was kind of, you know, kind of not good, it

Unknown:

was not good, it was kind of in shambles. And his relationships

Unknown:

are in shambles. And he was embarrassed. And so on her

Unknown:

deathbed, he's like, promise things like, Well, I'm gonna

Unknown:

make you proud. And I need to be a better son who's making a

Unknown:

promise with himself, right.

Unknown:

And then from that moment, right there, he proceeded to not do

Unknown:

anything

Unknown:

for a year and a half,

Unknown:

as a year and a half, that phase to finally kick in. So phase one

Unknown:

was right there on the deathbed of his mother, and she's

Unknown:

breathing her last breath, and he's like, I want change, I need

Unknown:

change, this has to happen. And then it took him a year and a

Unknown:

half, to finally go, Alright, ready for change. And so you

Unknown:

know, something powerful like that, you know, I just kind of

Unknown:

keep that in mind, when I just remember that people are in

Unknown:

different, those two different phases. And so yeah, there's a

Unknown:

lot of people who aren't ready for coaching, and I'll just flat

Unknown:

out, tell them that to me, like, you're not ready for me. And

Unknown:

there's no shame in that whatsoever, I've experienced

Unknown:

that many times where I've not been ready for change, you know,

Unknown:

sometimes that gap between phase one and two is like a day,

Unknown:

sometimes it's a year and a half. Yeah, and, and so I just

Unknown:

tell people, you're not ready, and that's okay. And you're

Unknown:

gonna get there, you know, and if you want to coach and come

Unknown:

find me otherwise, or get a coach, it doesn't have to be me,

Unknown:

if you want it, it's going to elevate your life, and it's

Unknown:

going to be amazing for you. So you have a beautiful vision of

Unknown:

what you want, you can get it, your success is inevitable. If

Unknown:

you do the inner work, and the outer work, all of us our

Unknown:

success is inevitable. And I guess that's why, you know, as I

Unknown:

come to this crossroads of we're on leaving radio, and I'm moving

Unknown:

on to coaching and a lot of people are going wow, you must

Unknown:

be terrified, you're giving up your salary. And it's like, I

Unknown:

got zero income plan for 2022. But I still got bills, and

Unknown:

people I see. And, and you know, you don't know if it's going to

Unknown:

work.

Unknown:

And I just I just say nine, like my success is inevitable.

Unknown:

And a big part of this, the M er, releasing that was limiting

Unknown:

beliefs, you know, one of them was was not good enough. And I

Unknown:

have achieved so many things in my life. And I never got to

Unknown:

fully really enjoy those achievements. Because I was just

Unknown:

kind of you have that impostor syndrome, like, you're worried

Unknown:

that, okay, I lucked out, and I got this, but I gotta keep

Unknown:

working really hard. So I became a workaholic. And always just

Unknown:

trying to, you know, I proved myself maybe that I was good

Unknown:

enough for the next level, the next level, the next level. So I

Unknown:

released all of that. And now I'm just like, I am good enough,

Unknown:

I can actually just say that and actually believe it. And so I

Unknown:

just know, I'm gonna be able to face any challenges by

Unknown:

confidence went from person who had very low self confidence to

Unknown:

someone who a lot of people might think I have too much now,

Unknown:

such a drastic change.

Unknown:

And it's just, it's just such an amazing place to be and when you

Unknown:

can let go of that and, and really get in tune with who you

Unknown:

are and what you're capable of. And I don't even know what I'm

Unknown:

fully capable of.

Unknown:

And is what like you said, we have self doubts even there

Unknown:

ourselves. And we see so much potential and everyone else,

Unknown:

sometimes we can't see in ourselves. And so you there's a

Unknown:

mystery, and I'm actually more curious and intrigued by the

Unknown:

mystery than scared of the mystery. And just know that

Unknown:

whatever challenges are going to want obstacles, because that

Unknown:

means you are making progress. You're getting closer, you're

Unknown:

you're growing. Yeah, I want fail, because that means you're

Unknown:

trying. Whereas a lot of the times you don't be afraid I was

Unknown:

a perfectionist. Once upon a time, like severe perfectionist,

Unknown:

I hated failing, I would let anyone else fell in front of me.

Unknown:

And I would nurture them and comfort them and go like, Hey,

Unknown:

don't be so hard on yourself. And then I would use every swear

Unknown:

word in the book, when I made a mistake, because I needed to be

Unknown:

perfect. And it was from something that was deep rooted

Unknown:

in my youth. And so I was able to let that go. And so because

Unknown:

of that I love making mistakes. Now I love learning from it. And

Unknown:

I know obstacles are just there. They're not a deterrent to tell

Unknown:

you to stop going down this path. They are something you go,

Unknown:

hey, it's time to grow. It's time to stretch. It's time to

Unknown:

learn new ways of doing things. Because what you know right now,

Unknown:

it's not going to work. That's so great. You're going to learn

Unknown:

something new and you're going to be better for it. And that's

Unknown:

just exciting. And so yeah, you know, when it comes to people to

Unknown:

say, well, it must be so scary and I'm like It's nuts.

Unknown:

Hearing at all, I have zero regrets about leaving behind my

Unknown:

23 year radio career. And I don't know, I've let go with the

Unknown:

results of what's going to be coming up next. But I am all in

Unknown:

on the journey. And, and because of that, I really don't have

Unknown:

any, any fear. And I know my success is inevitable because

Unknown:

I'm going to continue doing the inner work. And I'm going to put

Unknown:

in the, the effort for the outer work. And so it's just, it's

Unknown:

just a matter of when that's the mystery. When When am I going?

Unknown:

What will that success look like? When will it happen? And

Unknown:

that's what the equation is for all of us. Yeah. Yeah. And how

Unknown:

much we're open to it or not. And it's, it's incredible. When

Unknown:

you say, Yeah, you are on this new path now, and you're not

Unknown:

scared. Uncertainty is something that excites you instead of

Unknown:

ignites, like, crippling anxiety.

Unknown:

And there's, there's, you know, people where you can sense or

Unknown:

Yeah, they've learned to repeat affirmations that they've heard

Unknown:

on.

Unknown:

I don't know, a podcast, radio station or read in a book. And

Unknown:

then people where you can really feel that they are walking their

Unknown:

talk, right? Do you know what I mean? Like some people, like

Unknown:

talk in a lot of absolutely estimative ways, and you're

Unknown:

like, Okay, I get all this, but your vibe is not really, you're

Unknown:

trying to sell me something here, and I don't like it. And

Unknown:

the first time we talked, I could sense that you really

Unknown:

meant it. And

Unknown:

I mean, I'm probably not the first person you attract into

Unknown:

your life, who's, who's telling you, hey, if there's anything in

Unknown:

my power I can do to boost you, please let me know. And you're

Unknown:

going to meet more people who are gonna lift you up, because

Unknown:

they can feel your strong desire to be out there and to do this

Unknown:

work. And that is, so that is hard to put into words. Because

Unknown:

you will feel it and you will know what I mean, right now,

Unknown:

maybe you know, already.

Unknown:

But there will be. Yeah, no big fear, no big anxiety, no big Oh,

Unknown:

my God, where's my money gonna come from? Because people know

Unknown:

that you are a no bullshitter. And this is so incredibly

Unknown:

valuable in a world where, you know, there is a salesperson at

Unknown:

every corner for pretty much everything 24/7.

Unknown:

And if there's people like you, among them, who actually is very

Unknown:

calm and says, hey, I can just

Unknown:

share my tools with you, we can start talking and

Unknown:

we can be raw and honest here. And there's going to be Yeah, no

Unknown:

doubt that you're going to make it big times out there. So I'm

Unknown:

excited to follow you. I'm excited to hear about your

Unknown:

story. Come 2022

Unknown:

If there was one thing, or maybe let's say two things that you

Unknown:

would

Unknown:

say to a person who is in a situation right now that they

Unknown:

found out shit, like they have to pay their bills, they're

Unknown:

unhappy with their jobs now.

Unknown:

What are what can they do? If if they don't really know what

Unknown:

their purpose is? So what helped you like you were busy with your

Unknown:

radio station? And you said you got interested in coaching, but

Unknown:

what would you advise to a person who doesn't quite know

Unknown:

okay, what is my purpose here? How can I get closer to it?

Unknown:

Yeah, you know, small hinges swing big doors, right? And you

Unknown:

got to do small steps. And, like, first thing I would do is

Unknown:

pick up a book, pick up a book on self growth, and you start to

Unknown:

go inward, because that's where all the answers are. If you're

Unknown:

if you're looking for happiness, it's not outside. I've done a

Unknown:

lot of that. Because, you know, there's there's, there's joyous

Unknown:

experiences from externally. Absolutely. I love you know, new

Unknown:

external stimuli that reason, but you know, the true

Unknown:

contentment comes from within and it took me a long time to

Unknown:

really tap into that and I I battled anxiety, I've battled

Unknown:

panic attacks, and I've overcome that completely and did a one,

Unknown:

one ad on it. And it started with just kind of delving into

Unknown:

myself and you'll start

Unknown:

To

Unknown:

learn more about yourself, and when you do that, you'll see how

Unknown:

it aligns up with something. And then when you're ready, the

Unknown:

universe is gonna put something in your path. I had no idea life

Unknown:

coaching was a thing. And then everything I had just been

Unknown:

preparing for, on my own, I didn't even know his

Unknown:

preparation, I was just trying to be a better person just

Unknown:

trying to grow and you know, from within.

Unknown:

And that's where it begins, you do the inner work and it shines

Unknown:

outward, and you're going to find your passion, it's going to

Unknown:

reignite there with you. And then when you do,

Unknown:

don't ignore it,

Unknown:

you, you're going to have doubts, we have the two parts of

Unknown:

our brain. One is the primal brain, the monkey mind. And then

Unknown:

the other one is the evolved brain. And that old monkey mind,

Unknown:

it's very outdated software.

Unknown:

Where, you know, that's our fear, or, you know, fight or

Unknown:

flight mechanism. And so, there's so many times we think

Unknown:

we're, our brain asks us, put us to convince us, we're in danger.

Unknown:

And that means anytime we try to grow, it's like, don't, it's

Unknown:

gonna be uncomfortable.

Unknown:

And so it tries to keep you safe, and keep you stuck is in

Unknown:

the end is what it does is when you learn how to silence that,

Unknown:

once it pops up, just go, okay, that's just, that's just critter

Unknown:

brain in there, that's just that part of my mind.

Unknown:

And that's okay, you know, you don't chastise it or anything

Unknown:

like that, you just accept it for what it is. And if the

Unknown:

building's ever on fire, you're gonna love the fact that you

Unknown:

have that part of your brain still, but

Unknown:

But otherwise, you just really get in tune with, with your mind

Unknown:

with your unconscious, because even at a conscious level,

Unknown:

that's the conscious mind is such a small part of who we are.

Unknown:

So on the unconscious level that you got deep, dive deep into.

Unknown:

And when you do, that's where you're going to find everything

Unknown:

that you need.

Unknown:

And, and it's within you, you got it. And just keep taking

Unknown:

small steps forward, and it just turns into something much, much

Unknown:

bigger. And it's going to require uncomfortable action.

Unknown:

And you'll learn

Unknown:

if you can shift your mindset to learn that that's an exciting

Unknown:

thing. And you're welcome.

Unknown:

Yeah, we all have our potential, it's,

Unknown:

it's tough when you do you see people start to dream, they know

Unknown:

how it's going to change their life, and then they hold back

Unknown:

just because they're not willing to take that uncomfortable step.

Unknown:

willing to be uncomfortable.

Unknown:

getting exactly what they want. Yeah. So beautifully said and I,

Unknown:

I totally agree with everything you said there. And it's like

Unknown:

you say at the end, the big part is that you have to be willing

Unknown:

to,

Unknown:

to let go a little bit of the addiction to having to feel good

Unknown:

all the time. And to embrace life is really dark at times,

Unknown:

life is pretty dramatic at times. And it is scary at times.

Unknown:

And it is okay. You don't need to live in denial, or distract

Unknown:

yourself from it. It's it's part of it, and especially self

Unknown:

growth

Unknown:

is not like progress is not linear. There's lots of detours

Unknown:

and

Unknown:

being a little bit uncomfortable for the right reasons. is the

Unknown:

strongest lesson I've learned here in 2021. I think

Unknown:

I have one more question for you. I was going to wrap up now.

Unknown:

But I have one more question for you.

Unknown:

What is the biggest lesson you've learned about yourself in

Unknown:

recent years, that

Unknown:

that you would like to share with us?

Unknown:

The biggest lesson

Unknown:

from a mental standpoint, it was becoming aware of the two parts

Unknown:

of the brain that will no primal part that tries to tell you,

Unknown:

you're in danger all the time and just knowing how to

Unknown:

communicate with it and just saying no, I'm safe. I'm not in

Unknown:

danger. I'm actually very, very safe. And then you can proceed,

Unknown:

no problem.

Unknown:

But what really shifted for me.

Unknown:

What I'm really grateful for is

Unknown:

that I finally love myself.

Unknown:

And for the longest time

Unknown:

I would really like myself, and there's other times that I would

Unknown:

absolutely despise myself. Part of that was you know, the

Unknown:

demands that I put on

Unknown:

you know, the baggage that maybe I

Unknown:

I was carrying around was I was given up for adoption when I was

Unknown:

born and

Unknown:

stayed in an orphanage for a few months, I wouldn't have any

Unknown:

direct memories of it. But I've stayed in the orphanage and I

Unknown:

was adopted by a very great couple. And, you know, I've also

Unknown:

lost them in my life.

Unknown:

Over the years, and you know,

Unknown:

like, and it's my mom life, she passed away 2002 Now, so it's

Unknown:

almost 20 years. So you and a lot of ways you feel like

Unknown:

orphaned. And then

Unknown:

again, god damn pandemic didn't help when you live alone, and we

Unknown:

work alone. Everything's just alone, alone alone. But it gave

Unknown:

me a chance to really dive into myself and, and I became my best

Unknown:

friend.

Unknown:

And that's something I never was to myself, I was a best friend

Unknown:

for so many people. And it was never a best friend for myself.

Unknown:

And

Unknown:

so that's an incredible gift that has come out of all of this

Unknown:

for me. And if, if people can take that journey, there's part

Unknown:

of you that you don't like that it's holding you back from

Unknown:

really loving yourself. Really

Unknown:

raw Aurora, I would I accept that everyone's flaws except for

Unknown:

my own. You know, if people made mistakes, I would laugh along

Unknown:

with them and say, they're really goofy, you know?

Unknown:

flaws, right? So a lot of charm.

Unknown:

But when I when I would do it, then I would just, I'd be

Unknown:

embarrassed to want to crawl with inside of myself. And I've

Unknown:

just learned at some point to let that go. And just all of a

Unknown:

sudden, it just happened. And

Unknown:

and it's the most amazing gift. Because when you can do that,

Unknown:

then no matter where you are your best friend.

Unknown:

That brings tears to my eyes. That is so precious. So

Unknown:

beautiful. And Wow. Thank you so much for sharing that for being

Unknown:

here and being so yeah, vulnerable and transparent. And

Unknown:

at the same time, so courageous. It's been a great pleasure tried

Unknown:

to have you here. Thank you. So so it's weird being on this side

Unknown:

of it. I'm used to being the person who's hosting things

Unknown:

right on the radio. And so I'm usually asking the questions in

Unknown:

the Questions as a coach asking the questions at our host.

Unknown:

It's weird to be in the spotlight because I love shining

Unknown:

the spotlight on anybody and everybody else. Ah, well, I will

Unknown:

invite you back and then you'll be my host.

Unknown:

I would gladly answer some questions. Yes. Now it would be

Unknown:

so much fun. Yes, we should interview you. Yeah, no, I

Unknown:

really liked that idea.

Unknown:

All right. Well, thank you so much for being here. And yeah,

Unknown:

if you guys want to reach out to Troy, I will put his information

Unknown:

in the shownotes. Is there any other way people can contact you

Unknown:

for now? Is Facebook the best?

Unknown:

Facebook's a great way to do it. But yeah, I'll give you the

Unknown:

information and you can just share it as you see fit.

Unknown:

I'm not in hiding or anything like that so people can reach

Unknown:

out and thank you. Thank you for the conversation. I feel really

Unknown:

blessed to cross paths with you and we connected so fast and I

Unknown:

feel like I've just

Unknown:

made a friend really fast and it's really really neat. Yeah,

Unknown:

you are. You are a shining light. You love your sunny

Unknown:

disposition. You are magnetic. You are a gem.

Unknown:

Thank you so much Troy and you have a wonderful rest of your

Unknown:

day.

Unknown:

You bet

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