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What to Do When Life Seems Out of Your Control
Episode 11st September 2026 • SoloMoms! Talk • J. Rosemarie Francis
00:00:00 00:09:36

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The Reality of the "Everyday Grind"

I'm familiar with the weight you’re carrying because I’ve felt it too. We look at the world around us and it feels like it's going to hell in a handbasket. Between the headlines of wars, invasions, and threats of famine, and the literal shaking of the earth beneath our feet, it is a terrifying time to be raising a family. For a single mother, these global crises aren't just news stories; they add a heavy layer to the "everyday grind". The relentless pressure to keep your head above water when the waves just won't stop coming.

The anxiety we feel isn’t a personal failure or a lack of faith; it is a natural response to a world that feels increasingly unstable. Whether you are a young mother wondering how your children will ever survive on their own, or you’re like a dear 80-year-old friend of mine who is struggling to cope because life didn't turn out the way she planned, these fears are visceral. Here are the common stressors many of us are facing today:

  • Financial Survival: The constant, gnawing worry about whether the rent will be paid or if you can afford the next grocery trip.
  • The Fragility of Security: The fear that after decades of hard work, someone can simply change the rules, causing you to lose your savings or even your home.
  • The Future of Our Children: Looking at how hard we struggle and worrying that the next generation won't have the footing they need to survive.
  • The Weight of the Unknown: Facing a world where the plans we were told would work simply don't anymore.

These fears are real, and the threat is genuine. But I want to tell you today that while these things are happening, they do not have to be the end of your story.

Identifying What We Can (and Can’t) Control

When the storms are howling, we have to be very careful about where we spend our limited energy. It is so easy to exhaust ourselves trying to fix things that are completely out of our hands. I’ve learned that the onus is on us to stop depending on things that are ever-changing—like job rules or the economy and instead look for a permanent source of stability. It’s about protecting your heart and mind by choosing where to look.

We can stop wasting our strength on the "what-ifs" and start leaning into what actually brings peace:

Things We Can't Control

Where to Place Our Energy

Global invasions, wars, and famines

Opening an honest dialogue with the Lord

Arbitrary changes to work rules or "the way things are done"

Strengthening your spiritual foundation

The past or the plans that didn't work out

Talking to God about your specific needs right now

Other people’s decisions that affect your home or savings

Finding a rest that doesn't depend on the world's rules

I know this works because I lived it. I was a divorced mom left to raise two toddlers, ages two and four, all by myself. I know that heart-pounding fear of not knowing where the next meal is coming from or if we’d lose our roof. But looking back now that my children are grown, I can see that those needs were met. It wasn’t as bad as my anxiety told me it would be. When we hit the limit of what we can do, we usually find ourselves at a crossroads—and for most of us, that crossroads happens at 3:00 AM.

The 3 AM Invitation: From Palpitations to Prayer

We’ve all been there: lying in the dark at 3:00 AM, heart racing, chest tight with palpitations, and a mind spinning through a million things that are wrong. It’s exhausting. But I want to encourage you to see those sleepless hours not as a burden, but as a "whisper" from the Lord. For months, I struggled through those nights until I finally heard Him say, “Come talk to me.”

That invitation changed everything. I stopped "blabbering" to myself about my problems and started talking to the only One who could actually do something about them. If you are feeling burdened and overwhelmed, try this Prayer Process:

  1. Change Your Posture: Don't just lie there tossing and turning. Physically turn over onto your knees. It signals to your heart that you are moving from worry to connection.
  2. Be Persistent: If you’re up at 2:00 AM or 3:00 AM, use that time. This isn’t a one-time fix; it’s a daily (and nightly) practice of seeking peace.
  3. Cast Your Cares: Take every single one of those "million and one things" and do what 1 Peter 5:7 says: Cast all your cares on Him.
  4. Exchange the Load: You were never meant to carry the weight of the world while also working full-time and raising your babies. Hand Him the load so you can receive the rest He created you for.

The result isn't always that the problems go away instantly, but the internal storm goes quiet. You can be physically tired but mentally and spiritually calm.

Dropping Your Anchor and Finding Gratitude

Think of a ship in the middle of a storm. Without an anchor, it’s just going to be tossed about by every wave. For us, dropping our anchor in Christ is what steadies the ship. It’s the difference between being lost at sea and staying grounded while the storm passes.

  • The Anchor: This daily prayer forms your anchor. Life might still be "wavy," but you aren't being thrown around by the wind and tide anymore. You are steady.
  • The Gratitude Shift: When you unburden your mind, you finally have room for joy. I remember walking one Saturday morning and my cousin called to ask how I was. Usually, I’d just say, "Why complain? Nobody's hearing me anyway." But because of this peace, I actually said, "You know what? I woke up, I got out of bed on my own, I'm walking, and I'm enjoying the sunshine."

Quote of the Week: "Problems weren't solved, challenges were still there. Anxiety took a back seat to peace."

You don’t have to carry the physical toll of this life anymore. You don't have to live with the headaches and backaches that come from constant stress. By dropping your anchor, you let go of the physical weight and find the strength to keep moving forward, one grateful step at a time.

5. Key Takeaways & Timestamps

  • [00:01:24] The Everyday Grind: Acknowledging that global instability and the pressure of providing are real, but they don't have to steal your peace.
  • [00:03:50] Releasing Control: My personal story of raising two toddlers and realizing that things are rarely as bad as our anxiety predicts.
  • [00:06:06] The 3 AM Invitation: How to recognize the "whisper" to stop worrying and start praying when you can't sleep.
  • [00:08:05] Unburdening Yourself: Understanding the power of 1 Peter 5:7 and finding a calm spirit even when you're physically tired.
  • [00:10:01] Dropping the Anchor: The shift from a "why complain" attitude to a heart of gratitude for the simple things like walking and sunshine.
  • [00:12:12] Final Encouragement: A reminder that you don't have to carry the physical pain of stress; you can drop your anchor in Christ today.

Community & Resources

I am so glad you spent this time with me today. Please remember, you aren't alone in this journey. I’m just out here getting some sun on my skin and being grateful for the chance to walk and talk with you. Let’s stay connected and keep supporting each other as we navigate these choppy waters together.

  • Reach Out: If you need a listening ear or want to share your story, fill out the contact form at https://www.jrosemarie.com/contact.
  • Support the Show: Find resources to help you stay anchored at our Amazon storefront: https://a.co/d/0iognzp6.
  • Join the Conversation: I’d love to hear how you’re finding peace today. Please follow the show and leave a comment below! Thank you.

https://solomomstalk.mysites.io/podcast-2-copy/what-to-do-when-life-seems-out-of-your-control



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Transcripts

[:

[00:40] The Climate of Fear "Life can get terrifying sometimes. For some, it has been wars. It has been threats of war, whether it's earthquake, other natural disaster, threat of famine, an invasion, lots of things happening... and nowadays, it's the fear of what are they going to do next? Or it's the everyday grind of trying to provide for your family, trying to keep your head above water. Maybe you're young, anxious about how are you going to live on your own when your parents struggle so much... I was speaking with a friend who is 80 and she's anxious. She's having a hard time coping because life didn't turn out the way she planned."

[:

[03:15] The Turning Point (Invitation to Prayer) "So I understand anxiety... What happened to me is I started to pray when I got those [thoughts]. For the longest time, I was up at 3:00 a.m. I couldn't sleep. And I would be thinking about everything... My heart beating fast, palpitating, just anxious. And one morning... it's as if I heard a whisper as someone says, 'Come talk to me.' And I recognize that invitation as from the Lord... because that one action, that one morning changed the way I lay awake in bed at night... I discovered something: that I started to find peace. Problems weren't solved; challenges were still there. Anxiety took a backseat to peace... the storm was calm."

[:

[06:30] Closing Remarks "So I want to leave that with you today because all what I said before is true. The world seems to be going to hell in a handbasket. But you do not have to lose faith. You do not have to lay awake anxious. You do not have to carry headaches and backaches from stress. Drop your anchor in Christ. Thank you for watching, for listening... It's Sunday morning... I didn't go to church this morning. I'm walking, getting some sun on my skin, and just being grateful... Please follow me. Follow for more and comment below. Thank you."

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