The D Tour podcast is proudly sponsored by Macs Adventure

Macs Adventure specialise in self guided walking and cycling holidays for independent, active people who don't want to be part of the crowd or restricted by set dates and schedules.

Harriet Thomas has set off on her incredible journey on foot from Land's End To John O'Groats to raise funds for Dementia Adventure.

But you can't just wake up one morning, decide walking 900 miles is a good idea and simply walk out the door. It takes a bit more preparation.

In this episode Harriet shares her motivations behind her walk, why she wants to raise awareness around Dementia, how she has prepared for the adventure and a bit about her life too.

You'll hear her love for music, nature and passion for connecting with others.

If you like what we are doing and want to support the Dementia Adventure Support Fund please donate

Dementia Adventure has been at the forefront of providing fully supported, small group short breaks for people living with dementia and their carers for 15 years. Our supported breaks offer more than just respite; they provide meaningful, purpose-driven experiences that significantly enhance the quality of life for both people living with dementia and their caregivers. 

You can listen to Harriet's playlist on Spotify. Each week she's adding songs to match her mood on her epic walk!

The D Tour podcast is proudly sponsored by Macs Adventure. Macs Adventure specialise in self guided walking and cycling holidays for independent, active people who don't want to be part of the crowd or restricted by set dates and schedules.

They encourage you to go at your own pace whilst they support you with all of the routes and logistics for a worry free adventure.

Welcome to the D Tour, a special podcast series where I share my incredible journey, walking 900 miles from Land's End to John O Groats to raise funds for Dementia Adventure. I'm Harriet Thomas and you can follow my adventures by visiting Dtour.uk. Us humans, we're all different creatures with unique passions, experiences and things that drive and motivate us. These aspects of our lives can either build us up and give us confidence to fulfill our potential, or sometimes they break us down. On this journey, I'll share more about myself, my life and my motivations as I walk through the beautiful british countryside, saying that there's plenty to connect us as well. And I truly believe that by connecting with others, we can find our tribe, our community and, well, a problem shared is a problem halved, right? Community is crucial and ever more so as you get older, as we can lose people we have loved or connected to in the past. It's one thing being alone, another feeling alone. As I take my own journey through the counties, hills and trails of the UK, I'm looking forward to the conversations I'll be having with others and hearing their stories and finding my tribe.

So here goes. Who am I? Well, I'm many things, but I'm a singer songwriter and a poet. I write music for children, adults and myself. I also find a deep connection to nature, which in many ways is another form of music with all of its sounds and sensory stimulation. On my journey, I'll create a playlist of music that connects me with my travels and I'm really looking forward to sharing that with you. This week I've chosen two songs, "Me and Bobby McGee" by Kris Kristofferson and "Here Comes The Sun" by Rhe Beatles. So why have I chosen me and Bobby McGee? This song just came to me as I was walking along the path and it really reminds me of my dad, who obviously was a key influence in my life and he had a very outdoors life when he was a kid, so being outside always reminds me of him. But also in the song, it talks about freedom and I always feel so free when I'm outside.

But the song also tells us that freedom is nothing unless you're with people that you love. And this is so true for me. When I'm walking, I do a lot of walking by myself and I love to be by myself in nature, but being by myself in nature always causes me to reflect on how lucky I am to have incredible people in my life that I love and that love me, my friends and family that are always there for me. So the freedom of being in nature reminds me of the beauty of being part of a community. The second song, "Here Comes The Sun", it's kind of a joke. It's my own personal joke, I guess, really, because I know that on this 900 miles walk, sometimes there's going to be sunny days, but sometimes there's going to be rainy days. But the point is, you can create your own sunshine. And I think for me, being outside, it's always such a joy, whatever the weather.

And when it's rainy, I always love the clouds and the moodiness and I even enjoy the rain, the wetness, the feel of it all. And so whatever the weather, there's always sunshine. And that's why I've chosen Here Comes The Sun. As soon as I get outside, whether it's raining or sunny, for me, I'm sunny inside. So the sun is always there. For rights reasons, I can't play the music here, but the playlist will be on the detour UK website for you to listen to or download and I hope you enjoy the songs as much as I do. Walking, of course, is also a passion of mine and you'll hear plenty more about that over the next 90 days. But let me tell you first why I'm doing this.

In my preparation for this walk, I've also spoken to or will be speaking to experts and people with lived experience of the disease. But this podcast isn't just for people who are living with dementia or their carers. This is for everyone. If nothing changes, dementia is going to affect half of us. Yes, that's half of the whole population of the UK within the next ten years, according to Alzheimer's Research. We can no longer hide and pretend it isn't happening. We must get out there and make strides, no pun intended, to help raise awareness of what's happening, but also to help look after ourselves. There is now plenty of evidence to suggest that almost half of all dementia cases can be prevented and delayed by looking after ourselves better.

This is the sound of me going up about 60 very steep steps cut into the hillside, which is my training for the south west coast path, which is the first part of my land's end to John O groats walk. Oh, I think I need to do this a few times to get fit. I'm trying to be as light as possible. It's very easy to overpack your backpack. So I definitely went into a huge sort of rabbit hole of what's the lightest camping mat? What's the lightest but warmest sleeping bag? What are the lightest boots? What do I actually need to bring? And I found when I was at home, I was meant to be working. And actually what I was doing was spending what seemed like hours reading blogs and going to forums and looking at shops and trying to buy the very best kit that was going to be the very lightest. But how did I know it was going to work? And then I realised that I didn't. I realised I didn't know how anything was going to work.

And that to a certain extent, I just needed to let it all go a bit because everything would become clear once I started. And that has really been what it's like. I did buy a super light camping mat, which is called a Thermalite, which was recommended by everybody. I got a super light tent. It's called a Nordisk, and it's about 830 grams. And I love it so much. It's like my little, my little space I go to every night.

And it just literally is big enough for my sleeping bag and it's got a little bit outside for my rucksack. So there was a point where I realized that I was probably going, like, into my own head about all the preparations. I kind of drew a line under it. And as it happened, my daughter was getting married and she wanted a three day celebration. And the second day of that was a big party in my garden. So I've been gardening, I guess, since January, planting seeds. I made a beautiful... It turned out,

I'll say it's beautiful because it turned out, turned out really well. I made a wedding arch out of the bamboo in the garden. So I cut some bamboo, made this wedding arch, very tall because her husband is six foot five. And I sowed some sweet peas and some beans, and they climbed up the wedding arch and it really did look beautiful. So the last, I would say, two weeks before I left to come on the D Tour was 100% wedding preparation. And it was so worth it because we had such an amazing time. Everything went to plan and more so it was really, really incredible. Such happy times.

And actually, the day after, on Monday, the day after everyone had gone home except for me and my daughter and her husband, who stayed to help me clear up a bit. Me and my daughter were both in tears. We were so sorry to take down the lights and take down all the decorations and put the house back to how it was before. We were literally crying. So it was great for me to, two days later, leave for the D Tour because that just meant I could just move on to the next exciting adventure in my life. So it came at a great time for me. I know it's so difficult, you know, when. If you're looking after or if you have a loved one with dementia.

I know for me and for my dad, for my dad especially, it was very hard to see this woman that he loved, who was so intellectually brilliant lose all of that. It would be fantastic to be able to reframe the changes that happened during dementia. I mean, I saw it all, you know, the gradual loss of memory, the loss of function, the loss of emotional regulation, my mum forgetting who I was, my mum not being able to talk. But I want to say something about connection, because for me, my mum was still my mum. I don't quite know how, but she was. My mum was a very kind, loving, funny person. And we still had jokes even when she couldn't talk. We still had connection.

We still had moments of, as I say, fun, sharing, connection, happiness. We still had moments that I can look back on and think, yeah, we really had a good time then. So even though she had dementia, society makes that such a losing of everything. And I just want to say that it's not a losing of everything. If we can have the skill and the understanding and the education to find different ways to communicate with our loved ones, if we can use nature, if we can use music, if we can use craft, you know, whatever it is. And it may be different for each person, but there will still be somewhere where we can connect with our loved one. So after mum died, I started to do regular music sessions at the care home where she lived for nine years. And it's always a fabulous experience because I never know how anyone is going to react.

But what always amazes me is that, you know, I see people come to life, you know, clapping their hands, stamping their feet, dancing, singing, and we're all doing it together. It's a connected, shared activity and it's really, really, it makes me so happy. It brings joy to the residents of the care home and also it brings some inspiration and uplift to the carers in the care home too. And one day, the manager, who I know very well, said, I wonder if you could go and sing to a lady who I had known for many years, who was dying. And I was like, of course! It was around Christmas time, so I went into her room and the lady was lying with eyes closed, and I just started singing some very well known Christmas carols and tapping the rhythm very gently on her hand. And she began to move her hand and to tap back, and it was such a beautiful, beautiful experience.

It was like saying to her we're still with you, we're still with you, we're still with you communicating with you, we're still singing with you, we're still touching you.

Now I want to introduce you to Doctor Raja. He's a consultant psychiatrist, speciallising in old age psychiatry, and is part of my support crew on this journey. Doctor Raja will be meeting up with me at a few points on my adventure and will walking alongside me.

I think one of the things that people tend to forget is that dementia doesn't uniformly involve all brain functions in one go. And it's always important to try and identify what the strengths of the individual are at any given point of time. One of the good things is long term memory is possibly the last thing that people would lose. And therefore, having those very enriching conversations about their own personal life events actually gives them the confidence that they can have conversation and they can have meaningful conversation. So I think it's very important to understand that behind the facade of having dementia, there is a human being, and they may not perceive, they may not recall, but there are things that you can do to communicate with them. So my grandfather, he developed dementia. Sadly, he died a few years ago. And I was used to seeing where people will go and say, oh, well, do you recognise me? Do you recognise me? And it's always difficult when the dementia has advanced for the person to even recognise their own immediate family.

But my mom would always, when she goes to see my grandfather, she would always start by saying something along the lines of, how are you, father? And then she'll say her name and say, I've come to see you. So it kind of immediately takes away the anxiety about who he's seeing, or it doesn't have to be done in a way. You don't have to really question someone to establish that they can't remember. And sadly, nothing comes out of those kind of questions anyway. It only makes the person more anxious. I recently saw someone who used to be a watercolorist of repute, and yes, he couldn't remember a lot of things about day to day life. But once we started talking about artists, and he started talking about his association with some of the very famous artists that one could think of, he was so happy. And he wanted this conversation to continue to the point, which was, it was actually inspiring to a junior doctor who came along with me and said that, oh, well, you could have these conversations.

I said, yeah, you could have conversations. It's about encouraging the other person to talk about things that they're familiar with. And as long as you can do that, they are very happy. So I think one of the misconceptions that we need to be rid of is focusing on what people with dementia can't do. We need to focus on what can they do, and how can we actually encourage them and facilitate them to indulge in it even more?

I'm looking forward to hearing more from doctor Raja over the coming weeks. Somebody who's absolutely embracing the concept of what you can do, not what you can't is Peter Berry, co author of several books written with his friend and cycling enthusiast Deb fund. He was diagnosed with young onset dementia at the age of 50. He's now 60 and can often be spotted on his bike, sometimes his penny farthing.

So cycling was a big part of my young life and over a period of time, I suppose we ended up working, business, family, mortgage, not much time. So cycling fell to the wayside. But then after my diagnosis and the twelve months of depression, I needed something. So I took cycling again and I created that, used that passion as a compass to give me direction. And I found that when I was on the bike, I wasn't Peter with dementia, I was Peter the cyclist. And because I knew so much about bikes and maintenance and all that sort of thing, other people all of a sudden needed me to help them fix a puncture, to help them maintain a bike. And there was that sense of purpose, that sense of worth, so that's what happened, but it gave me this sense of purpose. And the simple machine that is a bicycle opened up a whole new, I suppose, future for me.

And that's the key thing. And riding the Penny Farthing, which is another thing that I still do, one of the key things is that a dementia diagnosis takes a lot away from an individual and the people around us. It takes your independence, it takes your driving license, your ability to work, earn living, to have this sense of purpose, this sense of worth. And that's when I think that the curtain starts to close on that show that's called life. You know, the end music is then being played because things are starting to run down, because there is nothing. Why can we not say during a diagnosis of dementia that, you know, yes, you can still achieve things, yes, you can still do things, yes, life will be different, but it's still going to be reasonably good and take that positive part of it and then use that for the future. So we mustn't take this diagnosis of dementia as the end. It's just part of this journey of life.

Peter is a real inspiration to me. Of course, this isn't everyone's story. Not many of us could ride a Penny Farthing before a dementia diagnosis, let alone after. But it's wonderful to know that with support around him, he has been able to pursue his passion.

So I'm very passionate about what walking can bring or being outside in nature can bring to everybody. Whether you have dementia, whether you're caring for someone with dementia, whether you're just a regular person going to work. You know, we're all human and we all respond to walking in nature. And it's such a simple thing, it doesn't really cost anything, but it brings so much to our mental well being, to our spiritual well being, to our physical well being. One thing that I noticed for myself when I started to walk every day was that it's like the daily walking enforced a kind of self regulation. So my emotions became better regulated, my eating became better regulated, my sleeping became better regulated. It's as if by walking every day, my whole mind, body, spirit connection just seemed to settle into a natural rhythm. And there's lots of science that backs this up and I think it's definitely worth a try.

Another walker and nature enthusiast is Fiona Pettit, the CEO at Dementia Adventure, the charity I'm raising money for on this walk. Before I headed into the final throes of the wedding organization with my daughter, I visited their offices in the countryside near Chelmsford and, of course, went for a walk in the pouring rain with Fiona. I just wanted to find out a bit more about what they do and why.

Just putting my hood up?

Yes.

Just. Do you need that?

I think I can put my hood up, too.

When you are planning something, you sort of forget what the first stages were, because then you get stage one, stage two, then eventually you're stage 24 and you forget, how did I get into this in the first place?

How did this start?

But how it started was, I want to explore the world on foot. And I thought, let's start with the UK and let's have an adventure. And for me, because walking and my appreciation of nature very much comes from my mum.

Right

This is, and she was very adventurous as well. She traveled a lot and this is very, you know, this is sort of really in her honour as well. And she loved all the… You know, what I love about doing this walk and about talking to everyone at the dementia adventure team is that recognition of being in the moment and how important that is, not just for people with dementia, obviously, but for everybody, for their carers and for every single person to really remember that. I think there's a feeling that because someone is losing their memory, that they're kind of losing life and they're not losing life, they're losing their memory. But there's so much more. There is so much adventure, there's so much pleasure, and especially when you come outside, because it's so simple, it's so accessible, so kind of that's how the whole thing started.

That's why we're walking down this road here.

When you come outside you can leave the dementia behind and somehow you just get a different sense of perspective again, don't you? And I think that's, that's so important.

And I think for the carer, you know, for carers as well, I think it gives care as a break, doesn't it? And allows them to interact with their loved one in a different way that perhaps is not quite so pressured as sometimes it feels at home. And you can share things together, can't you?

Yeah. Yeah.

Fiona, I'd love you to introduce yourself and just to let us know what your role is at dementia adventure.

Yeah, by all means. Well, Harriet, I mean, a. It's just so lovely just being able to spend this time with you. I am thrilled. I'm Fiona Pettit. I joined Dementia Adventure as their CEO three years ago, just over three years ago, when I knew you were going to be doing this amazing adventure for us and all that that's going to, I know, bring through it. But when I was just hearing about you, I thought, oh, my goodness, Harriet, you are a woman after my own heart and I can't wait to meet you. And finally today, before you set off, I get to meet you, which is absolutely fabulous.

I'm somebody that also loves the outdoors. I lost both my parents to dementia.

We've both had parents who had dementia and so we understand. It is incredibly sad and incredibly difficult. I'm not trying to underplay that, however, there are things we can do to remember that, but it's still a person, you know, and they still can enjoy the outdoors or they can still enjoy making a flower arrangement or whatever it can be. You know, human experiences are still open to us all.

It's believing what's possible and thinking the possible, not the impossible. Things you can do, as we say, and the organisation, not the things that you can't do. And it's seeing the front door, if you like, both physically and metaphorically. That's not the end of it. You can step outside your front door, whether that is literally physically, and be able to step out in the garden or go out for a walk or try, you know, it's not possible for everybody we know, but, you know, just thinking about it or thinking about, well, what could be brought in from the outdoors to, you know, into your front door and bringing nature inside indoors and being able to appreciate that. And what does that do for the mind and the brain and your mindset as well, but also that sort of metaphorical thing of, you know, stepping over the boundary of your. And the threshold of your front door. You know, actually, can I.

You know, we've, we've got a wonderful friend with, with dementia. And, you know, he's somebody that says he's a great cyclist. And he said, when I cycle, I leave my dementia behind at home, you know, and it's all the reminiscences that, that brings. And he knows what he's doing. You know, he hasn't forgotten anything about bikes. He might have forgotten what your name is, even though you spoke to you five minutes ago, but he hasn't forgotten what a bike is. He knows how to cycle, he knows even how to mend a puncture, you know, but he can do that. And there are things that we get into the rhythm of doing.

You and I were talking about the rhythm of walking and how therapeutic that is and how good it is for the mind, not just the muscle aches, isn't it? And the mobility, but actually what that does for you.

And I think from everything that you said, again, what I'm thinking is that by finding these sort of solutions and adventures for people who have dementia, we're actually unlocking something for ourselves as well, you know, because we're all human, you know, it's so relevant for all of us.

Like the sound of the gates. Look at these gates. Just opening automatically for us, isn't it? It's just opening up the way ahead of us.

Door opening. But, yeah, it's like, I mean, with my mum because she was a great gardener. When I. When we went out into the garden of her care home, that's when some of her language would come back because she was still able to talk about the flowers.

But, but so when I would go around the garden with her, I was also getting all those benefits too. Like, we were both smelling the rosemary and thinking it was gorgeous. So it's a human thing, isn't it? And I think it's remembering that whatever label someone has, we're all essentially human. And our evolution means that we react to certain things. And one of the things we react to is nature. Thanks so much for talking to me, Fiona. It's been so lovely for me to get more of an insight of dementia adventure as well. Cause it's something that will help me.

When I'm walking, especially there's bound to be, there's days and my legs are really tired. I'm like. And I'll be like, no, come on, keep going. It means I can play a small part in what you're doing and that's a really great honor.

And Harriet, we are truly thankful for what you're doing. I wish you all the best.

Thank you.

And I say that on behalf of the whole Dementia Adventure team. And what I'm excited about is just actually who all the people are that you're going to meet along the way and, you know, the conversations that you're going to have.

I love that Fiona is as excited as I am about who I'm going to meet along the way because that's such an important part of my trip. So much so that I couldn't help myself but start chatting to people during my training walks. Meet Lucy from Ben's Bakes up in Loch Lomond.

My father has recently been diagnosed with degenerative dementia, so it's of great interest to me to help him support.

And can I ask, does he, does he enjoy, like, outdoors, you know, being outdoors?

He walks every single day and it's about the only part of his normality that's still with him is to go out walking every day. He loves to go off to cups of coffee and just anything. That's life, really, which is good. He's nothing miserable at home, so we try and keep him active and it's a horrible disease, but there's ways of coping with it. Access support and help out there.

Lucy runs a food business and that reminds me, there are other issues to consider when walking this far. You can prepare so much, but then forget about the really basic stuff. I really do have to take the time to think about my well being when it comes to nutrition. It's easy to think that when you're walking you're just burning calories. So it doesn't matter what you eat or when, but there is more to it than simply fuel. I've been reminded that how when and where I'm going to cook or eat are important as well, and making sure I'm not always alone when I do eat. There is something lovely about eating on your own at times, but food and meal times are also meant to be a social experience and some of our best memories have been made at the dinner table. I also think that if I'm not held a little bit accountable for what I'm eating by other people standards might slip a bit.

I know sometimes if I'm on my own, I'll just put a bit of peanut butter, okay, a lot of peanut butter on a cracker and that will do me. But if I don't eat properly on a walk like this, I will run out of steam very quickly. I actually talked about this subject a bit with specialist speech and language therapist Sue Hinds when I was at Dementia Adventure meeting Fiona. Sue Hinds is Dementia Adventure's head of innovation, research and development. Eating and drinking is a big issue for people with dementia for many of the same reasons and more. In a later episode of the podcast, I'll explore this in more detail with sue, but here is just a snippet as she reminds us of the importance of food glorious food.

I've worked with many people who have got an eating and drinking or swallowing difficulty and I say to them, what's the biggest impact on your life? Or I say to the carers, what's the biggest impact on your life? And that biggest impact isn't the medical difficulties that are being associated with that eating and drinking difficulty, whether it's chest infections, dehydration, lack of nutrition. What they report as being the biggest impact is social isolation, not being able to engage with other people at mealtimes. If you or I go out for a meal with friends, we actually go out for a meal with friends to interact, develop relationships and have a nice time, don't we? That's what we go out to do. And if we sit that meal time in silence, then something's wrong. Something's going wrong. Because the key priority wasn't the meal. The key priority was connecting with other people.

I'm going to remember this conversation with Sue and really try to keep it front of mind. You know, when you're cooking for someone, you really make an effort, but you don't consider yourself the same way. I remember with my mum when she was in her last stages of dementia, food or feeding her was a key way of communicating and doing something for her. In her earlier stages, going to restaurants was a real flashpoint for her. All the clatter and noise confused and upset her. Food and the associations are all about being in the right environment. It's a very sensory experience, I suppose we're all individuals and I have to work out what motivates me and helps me to really look after myself.

So as my Land's End To John O'Groats hike approaches I've been noticing. I've been sitting at home getting so anxious. I'm so worried that I can't do this. I'm worried that I'll fail. I'm worried that I've bitten off more than I can chew. But what I notice is that as soon as I get out and I start walking, all those anxieties and negative thoughts literally seem to disappear out of the soles of my boots into the ground. And in their place comes all the calm and all the peace and the oneness of nature. And that's when I know everything is going to be fine.

I'm going to be fine. And this walk is not about success. It's not about failure. It's about following the path that was calling to me and just letting the path show me the way.

Thank you so much for listening to this episode of the detour. Don't forget you can support me and dementia Adventure by texting da five to 70711 to donate five pounds or visit the website detour UK. That's d t o u r.uk To follow my journey, I'm aiming to raise a whopping 25,000 pounds over the next 90 days to support more families living with dementia. To experience the respite, reconnection and hope that outdoor adventures together can bring. See you next week as I start my epic 90 day walk of 900 miles for 900,000 people living with dementia in the UK, I'll be experiencing the wonderful sights and sounds of Cornwall on the south west coast path towards Devon, stopping along the way with the odd cream tea and a natter. Someone I will be chattering to is Pix Ashworth, the founder of a bath and body works company called Land and Water. Like me, she's all for keeping stress levels down and endorphins up.

This will be a real treat. Pix is an expert on scents and smells and the powerful therapeutic role they can play in everyday life and also for people with dementia. Each day I plan to walk for somewhere between six and 9 hours, so maybe Pix can recommend something delicious to rub my feet with after. Hopefully the weather will be kind, but I'll take whatever comes my way. See you again on the detour.

The D Tour podcast is proudly sponsored by Max Adventure. Max Adventure specialize in self guided walking.

And cycling holidays for independent, active people who don't want to be part of.

The crowd or restricted by set dates and schedules. They encourage you to go at your own pace whilst they support you with all of the routes and logistics for a worry free adventure.