OUR HOSTS: 

Corinne Foxx - @corinnefoxx

Natalie McMillan - @nataliemcm and @shopnataliemcmillan 

What we're drinking: Bollinger Special Cuvée Brut Champagne 

MEET OUR GUEST: 

Topsie Vandenbosch - topsievandenbosch.com, @topsievandenbosch, Diva Boss Mastermind, Destroy the Mindset Drama Podcast 

ABOUT OUR GUEST: 

Topsie Vandenbosch helps business owners identify, learn and master the use of mindset and emotional intelligence skills in the leadership decisions made inside of their businesses, as well as assisting in transforming the mindsets of hundreds of business owners and career-focused women over the past 10 years. Prior to entrepreneurship, she practiced clinical mental health therapy, and retired from her private practice to pursue being a coach and consultant full time. She helps clients through one-on-one private coaching, group coaching programs, workshops, guest speaking and she's also got a podcast called Destroy the Mindset Drama for people wanting to move past their limiting negative belief

TOPIC: 

We’ve both had to confront our own limiting beliefs around our self worth, confidence in our careers and imposter syndrome, which is something today’s guest, Topsie Vandenbosch, helps her clients do daily. We get into what an emotional intelligence coach is and how she got to where she is in her career today. We discuss how to identify limiting beliefs that can have negative impacts on our professional lives, and how to develop tools and strategies to overcome them. Topsie also keeps it real and shares what she’s currently working through and her go-to method for doing the thought work. 

In this episode, we discuss:

• Topsie’s varied career 
• Determining if something is a limiting belief, or just a lived experience 
• Common limiting beliefs that many entrepreneurs and career-focused people share 
• Figuring out what is a thought versus the truth 
• Eliminating the shame around mindset work 
• Overcoming societal views of what a confident, powerful woman looks like 
• The power of being your own hype woman 
• Digging deeper on jealousy 
• Details about Topsie’s Destroy the Mindset Drama program 

END OF THE SHOW: 

Corinne and Natalie introduce Hottie of the Week: Jessica Chastain 

WINE RATING:

Bollinger Special Cuvée Brut Champagne = 8.5 / Jessica Chastain 

WRAP UP:

To wrap up the episode, we play 200 Questions. Corinne asks Nat what she has created that she’s most proud of, and Nat says that it’s the family and community that she’s built. Nat asks Corinne what she’s famous for amongst her family and friends, and Corinne says that it’s for sure her gift giving skills. 

We have a brand new newsletter for our Am I community. You can sign up for the newsletter on our website: amidoingthisrightpod.com

You can email us for episode ideas or Random Advice: amidoingthisrightpod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @amidoingthisrightpod 

Don't forget to rate and review the podcast! It really helps us grow!

85

[00:00:08] Natalie McMillan: And I'm Natalie McMillan.

[00:00:19] Natalie McMillan: And each week we cover a new topic and we drink a new bottle of wine.

We pop this one's.

Actually a popper, Papa

Today.

that in a sec. And,

Me too. Cause I mean, I feel like so many people have limiting beliefs around work and everybody, everybody, you know, every single person,

[00:01:00] Corinne Foxx: out. But at the end of the episode, you guys stay tuned because we're playing 200 questions.

No, we're not answering to questions. We're picking a question one through 200 and sometimes

I

[00:01:19] Natalie McMillan: No. Can I just tell you really, really well?

Yes, no, I

She was like, Hey, be as let's go, you better work your stupid. Bitch. And then she was like, yeah, that move. It's really spicy. Huh? Yeah. Get those in her thighs, get 'em nice and spicy. And I was just like, uh, please be a bitch. Like, come on you bitch. As you dirty slaps. And I was like, uh,

[00:01:59] Topsie Vandenbosch: gonna say, oh, I should go now.

I'm like, should I would say maybe don't go to Zoe's class. Oh my God. I hope it is okay. Cuz I have a

[00:02:15] Corinne Foxx: now. You'll know immediately if it's this girl. Oh my God.

Well, I thought she was doing a bit, I thought she was doing a bit. I was like, oh, and then she's gonna like become normal. And then she

[00:02:30] Corinne Foxx: she's spicy a lot in the class

[00:02:35] Natalie McMillan: anyways,

[00:02:38] Natalie McMillan: that we're drinking Kanye.

Okay. So this is a binger special Cove. Champagne brute is what it says. Is there a year? Do they do years for this? Oh, I just took a sip. It's a, it's a product of France. So I, I guess it might be a typical actual champagne. I don't know. Yeah,

[00:03:00] Natalie McMillan: wine.

That's true. Interesting.

[00:03:05] Natalie McMillan: Did it brought back the interesting, I would just really love if there was orange juice in that. Right. Of course. You know what I mean?

And, and really just women in the workforce in general. Mm-hmm and we've both had to confront our own limiting beliefs surrounding our own self-worth, you know, confidence in our own career is we've also both dealt with imposter syndrome. Especially when it comes to getting outside of our comfort zones.

Workwise. Yeah. And I think as a mindset and emotional intelligence coach topsy really is like the perfect person to give us some tips and tricks on how to overcome our own limiting beliefs. Yeah. And get out of those.

Yeah. But it's easier said than done. Mm-hmm so I just wanna intro her a little bit. She is a licensed master social worker and a mindset and emotional intelligence coach. She helps business owners identify, learn, and mass. Stir the use of mindset and emotional intelligence skills in the leadership decisions made inside of their businesses, as well as assisting in transforming the mindsets of hundreds of business owners and career focused women over the past 10.

Yes. Prior to entrepreneurship, she practiced clinical mental health therapy, retired from her private practice to pursue being a coach and consultant full-time. She helps clients through one-on-one private coaching group, coaching programs, workshops, and she does guest speaking. And she's also got a podcast called crush, the mindset spiral.

For people wanting to move past their limiting negative beliefs. Ooh,

[00:04:56] Topsie Vandenbosch: Hello? Hello. How are you? I'm doing good. Okay. So full disclosure, Uhhuh I'm in the middle of like launching one of my programs again, um, to my audience and I just needed to fucking rest y'all so I , I just woke up. like 45 minutes ago and I'm in PST. So I've been living.

I'm tired. I need to. Sleep in. And like, I need to take care of myself so I can show up as the best version of myself.

[00:05:34] Topsie Vandenbosch: With energy. No. Yeah. With energy because nobody wants a autopsy. Right. You can't relate. And it's interesting because, because we're on PST. A lot of my audience and my clients are on T so I'm always feeling like I gotta keep up and that's not fucking true.

I can't keep up. I'm already three hours. I'm three hours fucking behind, you know, so it's fine. So, well, I

[00:06:00] Topsie Vandenbosch: coach.

[00:06:04] Topsie Vandenbosch: is? Can you tell us the tea on that? I will. So I went to college originally thought I was gonna do business decided I don't know how to do math and I kept falling asleep in fucking math class.

Do, do you all relate? Like the shit is so boring. Oh

[00:06:28] Natalie McMillan: add.

I mean, if it gets the number gets too big, I'm like, whoa, this is a job for the calculator. . Agree, honestly, this shit is a mess. So anyways, my parents sat me down and they were like, honey, like math is not your thing. You're not gonna be majoring in business. Cause we're not, we're not even getting past algebra one.

And so they were like, you love to help people. You love people. What about social work? So my mom is a social worker at the VA and my dad, um, studied sociology and he is vice provost at a, um, liberal arts school. So like. Human caring about humanity is just like, and the way we think and the way we feel and how it affects the way we behave.

That's always been something that I've just been always aware of growing up in my household. And so I said, okay, but I ain't trying to be broke. So like social worker.

[00:07:32] Topsie Vandenbosch: Right. And so at the time, I remember being like, okay, my mom makes a really good living.

I love to help people. Let me go ahead and try out the social work thing. So I ended up getting my bachelor's in social work and I got my master's degree in clinical social work. Cause I wanted to do one to one therapy and group therapy. All of the things, case management I wanted to be in there in the trenches, mental health is something that's like, so close to me and close to my heart.

And so anyway, I decided to do that and I, you know, when y'all find your thing, you found your thing. Yeah. And I found my thing and it's. It was, it's been such a beautiful journey ever since. So I got done with my master's degree and I was like, I'm out here. I'm about to change the world. Like you can't fucking touch me.

I worked in, I worked in Flint, Michigan. I worked with individuals struggling with severe to persistent, um, mental illnesses. And they were dually diagnosed with like some type of substance abuse to pay. And so I was like, On the fucking ground, like making sure their medications were being taken on time, making sure that they could go to hospitals, psychiatric hospitals, if they were in psychosis, all of that shit paying, getting paid $14 an hour, the ghetto

And so the ghetto. And so then after that, I worked with so many different populations under the sun because remember a professor from when I was in college that told me not to buy into the belief that I could never, you know, change. The population I was working with because a lot of people like to stick at stick to one job forever.

Mm-hmm and for me it was just like, hell no, I've always kind of, I guess, been a creative mm-hmm I just didn't really know what that was. I thought that I was rebellious. I thought that I just didn't like authority. I thought that I just got bored too quick, but what it really was was that. I was I, you experienced burnout if you don't take care of yourself and if you don't continue to shift and find what you really enjoy.

And so I just really appreciated my professors and my undergrad just really giving me that permission slip to be fully me. So I never stayed in any job longer than what I needed to. And only I knew what that looked like. And I knew when it was time to move on. And so fast forward to, I mean, I've been PR I practiced.

And so anyways, fast forward to when I worked at the prison, that was a very difficult time because I did not realize just how. Bureaucratic and also patriarchal the system is because I lost all sense of who I was. I couldn't dress the way I wanted to. I remember being told not to wear makeup because they didn't want the prisoners to like look at, you know, the therapists or staff that way.

Yeah. And I just remember feeling like. What's like what the fuck is going on? Like, and so I gained a lot of weight because I wore things that were not flattering to my body. Like it really fucked with it fucks with your head when you work in environments that you can't be your full creative self, right?

Mm-hmm and like Natalie you're glammed up. Both of y'all are glammed up. I would get glammed up all the time before I started working at the prison. So imagine not doing it at all for the whole time I was there. So anyways, I left there joined a group therapy practice. Because I wanted to learn like what it's like to just be out on my own and not have to report to anybody and be able to really help the people that I wanted to help, which was entrepreneurs and career focused on women, struggling with depression and anxiety.

So I joined a group practice. They should. Showed me the ropes. I was there for a couple years, got my own office by myself. And then after that I grew and scaled my therapy practice. It was a brick and mortar and it was beautiful. I had never felt so much freedom than when I became an entrepreneur. Do have, do you guys relate to that at all?

Yes. Like I felt like when I became a business owner, it was, I could go back to a nine to five because ain't nothing wrong with it. And I learned so much. But the freedom, you have to be able to dictate your schedule, even if you're working a lot. Yeah. There's nothing like it. And so. I loved what I did, um, when I had my own practice, cuz I might reopen it again here in California, but what happened was, again, burnout because I was seeing, I had to see so many people, right.

I accepted insurance. So it was, it was amazing that I could dictate my hours, but now it was getting back to some of the same things I left corporate for. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Like feeling like you need to work hard to determine your worth, like, and really make that money. And I just didn't like that feeling.

So anyways, I remember thinking, like, I know I am meant for more. I know I can use my skillsets somewhere. I know that I am meant to work with incredible people. Like else hold names. Like I just do. Y did y'all ever have that moment where you just felt like. I know I am meant to do big fucking things and it scares me.

Yes, yes.

And also you're very connected to who you are and what you're meant to do. And you've said it throughout explaining your journey, like I'm meant to help people. I'm meant to help people I love. And you just have continued to reshape what that looks like in a way that also feels good to you. Right. And feels true to you.

And I think as we get older, maybe we get scared that like, Our preferences change and our dreams change. And it's not big time. Yeah. You know what I mean? And it seems like you've had the confidence to move and to trust that gut instinct you've had about, okay, this isn't serving me anymore. I can move on.

If so, if there's anything that your listeners wanna hear, you can never, ever lose. When you bet on you, it doesn't fucking matter. Who is. In your corner, who isn't, if you know your vision, you're the, you're the blueprint and you get to make that happen, you know?

Yeah. And like, so when it comes to like work and business, how do we identify those limiting beliefs that we have and then how do we develop a strategy to overcome them? Yeah. So that we can show up as the best versions of ourself, or we can chase that dream that feels very far away. Yeah.

So what I would say is. I like to be mindful when I'm working with my clients as to discovering, is it truly a limiting belief or is it your lived experience? And now you get to kind of determine how you wanna proceed because a limiting belief is only limiting. If you believe that it is every one of us.

Has a upbringing, a culture, we've been a part of experiences that we've had that shape the way that we behave in the way that we see the world. So just because your beliefs about, for instance, money doesn't look like someone else's beliefs about money doesn't mean that you have a limiting belief or they have, that's just their experience.

They get to determine for themselves whether it's affecting them, accomplishing their goals. So that's what I look at when it comes to our beliefs. They're limiting. If they're preventing you from being able to move forward in the direction that you desire. So for instance, a limiting belief for a person.

Could be some people truly believe that they don't desire to make a lot of money. Right. There are so many people. I talk to that they're happy. They're happy making 35, 40,000 a year. And I think that that's fucking amazing. And I do think that's a lot of money. Do I think that it's a livable wage depending on where you're living?

Yeah. In the United States? No, because here in C, I don't know what the fuck that's doing. it sticks. Expensive. You already know. I mean, they want your left tidy. They want the bloody first born for red. I mean, it's the whole thing. And so for instance, somebody that doesn't believe that they need money and they don't need a lot.

Right. They're happy and content with what they have that doesn't make that a limiting book leave. Mm. Right. Do you see what I'm saying? Because. It's not preventing them from doing anything that they wanna do. Right.

[00:16:43] Topsie Vandenbosch: can't cuz I, there we go.

[00:16:51] Topsie Vandenbosch: I, I mean, I think so. I think in general, so if we wanna talk about just in generalities, I think in general, a lot of us have our belief systems about the news, for instance, right? Some people think that the news is all propaganda and it's all like conspiracy and that the government and it's, and, and it, there be some pieces of truth there.

Sure I'm open to it, but some people truly do believe that the news is the cause of all the problems, right. Mm-hmm that we have in our society and others don't others. See it as we're citizens of the world, we get to know what's going on. Right. And it's not my job. To investigate and dissect everything they tell us.

And so I think that a lot of us have our beliefs about things, but it's really only a limiting belief. If you are allowing for it to crush you in your tracks to accomplishing your goals. So some of the most common ones I noticed the. Business owners have specifically is I'm afraid to charge that much.

No one's gonna buy, oh, what does it look like? If I put myself out there, I don't want to follow up with this particular person that wants to hire me because I don't wanna see needy, you know? Um, what, what's another thing I'll never make over this amount because I've never seen it. You know, in my family, God, what do I know about building a legacy?

Like, what do I know about this? Um, I haven't been in business long enough to do act. You see what I'm saying? Christ. You're calling me out Natalie going. I'm like, oh shit, I've been attacked. I telling you. So those are some of the ones that entrepreneurs have. And if you are not an entrepreneur and you're in your career, maybe it's the belief that.

You can't use your degree for anything, but what you graduated and you were told you could do that was my own limiting belief. I truly thought that I couldn't use my skillset because at the undertone of therapy is an element of coaching people. Right? That's like another skill that I, I naturally was trained in.

So. In saying that the way the school systems have been built, the institutions they're so old school and they still go off of the old template, which is you get this degree and you work in these types of jobs and this is your salary cap and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Right? Because they were. At the time there was there wasn't really this belief that entrepreneurship was sustainable.

And so the workforce, right. Thought that it was better, that we worked in jobs that have predictable income and all of that, but now things are changing and you get to expand your skillset outside of what you got your degree in, outside of what, like there's so many different ways that you can use any of the skills that you're trained in to be able to do what you wanna do.

But a limiting belief you could have, if you are in the nine to five corporate world is I am stuck. I can't do anything different, you know,

[00:19:53] Topsie Vandenbosch: Yes, yes. So why even bother? Why even bother? Like what, like who the fuck wants more loans, right? Like nobody wants, mm.

More long. So yes, I believe that we all have them, but we get to determine whether they're actually impacting what it is we wanna do. Yeah. And like,

[00:20:18] Topsie Vandenbosch: it? Yeah. So. So when you notice that you have a limiting belief, one of the biggest things I share with my clients is to, um, make sure you interrupt the thought pattern.

Mm-hmm a lot of the time we are thinking on autopilot, right? Yeah. You ever notice that you have these subconscious thoughts in the back of your mind? Running all the time, whether we realize it or not, unless you're in full meditation, we're not robots. So we're constantly thinking about something, right.

Mm-hmm . And so I would say number one, interrupt the thought pattern don't allow for it to become something that just comes and you don't question it. Question your thoughts? Where is this coming from? Another thing I like to say is, is this thought mine or does it belong to somebody else? Yeah.

[00:21:06] Corinne Foxx: Yeah. I love the idea of not believing every thought you have. Yes. Right? Like you can't, but just because it's a thought does not mean it's valid or it's real, or it has any weight. Yeah. Like you can just have the thought and it can be a thought. Yes, that doesn't make it true.

I love this. she's over here. She's over

[00:21:34] Natalie McMillan: mean? It's hard to unlearn. It's hard to unlearn.

Yeah. Because I don't think I've lost more friends. Than in entrepreneurship because it completely shifted the way I looked at the world. And I honestly was kind of silly for thinking that it wouldn't affect anything, but I, I wasn't considering how other people could perceive me. Yeah. And the person I was becoming.

So going back to Karin's question, interrupt the thought pattern, I would say interrogate it. So what makes this belief true? What is the evidence for this? Is this, is this a feeling or is this a fact because your feelings are not automatically the facts, you are not your thoughts. You are a human being, having thoughts, right?

So you, you get to interrogate the thoughts that drop in. And is this actually rooted in anything that's true. I'm launching a program. Currently for business owners who use coaching skills in the way they help their clients. So these could be marketing strategists, online coaches, whatever modality you're in.

If you use coaching in an element of how, the way that you help your clients, you could benefit from learning these evidence based coaching skills, the difference between coaching and therapy, et cetera, et cetera. One of the things I sent out to my email list yesterday is about. Whether imposter syndrome was inviting you to a larger conversation because sometimes imposter syndrome, right?

Sometimes it is rooted in our fears. It's our worst fear, right? For somebody to say, Natalie, you don't know shit about, you know, jewelry or whatever. Yes. Right? No, truly. That was like my biggest fear. When I first read it, I'm like some I'm gonna be found out. Even though I have, I have a degree, she has a degree

Doesn't know what she's

But when people wanted to ask me more, I was kinda like, I don't fucking know that much about emotion and I realized I needed to go get the education. So I got my certification in it and now it's helped me make more money now than ever before, because I was in integrity and I listened to that little voice that imposter syndrome dropped in.

I dissected what the truth was and what wasn't true through. And I looked at was there anywhere that I'm in, in, in when I, where I'm not in integrity. Because I do think when we interrogate our thoughts, it doesn't always have to have this like butterfly now I feel better. It could be, wow. This is inviting me to a larger conversation.

This is inviting me to a place of growth and that's harder for people, but I still believe. That the root of doing that comes from being able to not take your thoughts as automatic truths. Yeah. Mm-hmm

[00:24:35] Topsie Vandenbosch: Do you journal it out? Kind of, I think you could do it all types of ways. One of the ways I think is huge is. To eliminate the shame. You're probably feeling cause a lot of the time when you are struggling with limiting beliefs that are truly preventing you from me and able to take action, we struggle alone.

Do y'all relate to that. Like you almost feel like I don't wanna bother this friend. This friend is so busy. They don't have time to hear my shit. Mm-hmm

[00:25:07] Topsie Vandenbosch: It's not the same thing and it doesn't mean weakness.

So I would say one of the first ways to really work through that shame is speaking about it to a friend, Hey, I'm struggling with this belief and I know it's bullshit, but I think I need an objective perspective. On another way I could look at this situation. I,

Yes. BNE. She said something on a, I heard her say it was like shame's enemy is like communication or connection because it wants you to like go inside. It wants you, it wants to stay here. It can't live when you let it out. You know what I mean?

Because sometimes friends can be completely unhelpful if they don't fucking know the context, you know what I mean? They might try to say, oh girl, you're good. Don't worry about that. Right. And they're

[00:26:01] Topsie Vandenbosch: I was struggling, but okay. I'm really struggling.

Right. It's like the nervous laughter and the sweating. When you say that, but I would say talking to a friend, I would also say, I tell people to do a simple tee chart on one side. What is the feeling. On the other side, what is the fact? My feeling is I don't know enough to start, right? That's oftentimes, no matter where you are, if you are a 20 something person that wants to become a business owner, one of the first things you're gonna think is I don't know enough to do X.

What is the actual fact? I just need to take a day or two and do a little bit of research and then take the action.

I can't do this because I don't understand anything. I don't understand the, the lingo. I don't understand this. And I'm just not the right person. And they came back to me. They said, yes, you are the right person. And you know, Sit with your lawyer and do the work and learn it so that you can be a part of this opportunity.

And I was like, you're like, God. Okay. But it was, it was that limiting belief where I was like, I don't know enough to be an angel investor. Right. I can't invest, I don't have a business degree. I don't know what this contract means. And I was like, well, why don't you just sit and learn it, Karen, then walk away.

So thank God. Right. They emailed you back and they said, you are the person. And you have a lawyer that can dissect that lingo. You got this. Yeah, yeah,

Right. Turning my back on is not gonna gimme more information. I'm never gonna learn about it. Right. Yeah.

That's very healing because immediately. Shame can't really enter the conversation because you're acknowledging that this is something that you've never done before. You're actually very nervous about it and you're allowed to be nervous and not make it mean something about you.

But I feel like as women, sometimes self confidence. Is outwardly looked at as being a narcissist or vein. Oh, she's so into herself.

[00:28:56] Topsie Vandenbosch: Egg time.

[00:29:03] Natalie McMillan: Cause it's hard to step into that role. When you think, if people see me this way, I'm gonna be shamed.

Yeah. For being cool. Vein narcissistic indoor

Operating online, you have to have a healthy sense of narcissism. And what I mean by that is that I think that we demonize the opposite spectrum of it when honestly, it's life or death for your business sometimes to, yeah, not on social media to not. Be proud of who you've worked with to not brag about what you're able to do, because here's a thing confidence inspires action.

When people feel confident in the fact that you know, what you bring to the table, you know, the value that comes from working with you, you know, the transformation that your work has, people trust you more to buy. You notice that nobody trusts somebody. So it's actually an oxymoron when people try and call you in cuz here's the thing.

We can't worry about shit. Someone hasn't said to us, that's one of the first things, first rules for me personally, as a very confident woman, I can't sit around and wonder what somebody is gonna think about my confidence. Yeah. And whether or not I'm being cocky because it's none of my business. If they haven't said anything to me, I'm not gonna sit around and create scenarios.

Right. Cause that's also what we can do, create stories around what other people are thinking. And we can. Almost, uh, what's the word I'm looking for. What we can do in those moments is to predict and feel like we're the crystal ball. When we don't know, we don't know what people are thinking, and it's not up to us to assume that people are thinking negatively of us.

So the first thing I would say is if nobody has said anything, don't worry about them saying anything because whatever they haven't said to your face it's of your business, I think the other piece, um, when it comes to not looking cocky or whatever is really telling people that you don't accept. Their projection of you or their perception of you.

So for instance, and that turns people off. So for instance, somebody says that you don't care about that, that isn't really in your circle. Someone says troll a troll or whatever. I don't accept that. I reject that about myself. Yeah. Yeah. You need to be so rooted in who you are and what your intentions are that you piss them off with your confidence and your response.

Even if you don't feel confident, I like

Yeah. You know,

[00:32:06] Topsie Vandenbosch: actually pull it off. I was just gonna say, it's it's you being your own cheerleader, even when no one else is cheering you on yeah.

Your own hype woman, your own hype woman. I think that that's one of the hardest things about making really difficult decisions. And a lot of people around you don't understand is that you need to be that person. That's just so confident that is willing. To bet on yourself. That's wi you may not feel confident while you're doing it, but believing in your work.

So you may not feel confident, but what can you get behind? What can you get excited about that will allow for you to show up powerfully? Because here's the thing. Sometimes we're not gonna be confident when we show up and when we do the thing, but we gotta think of our bigger mission and the confidence comes with continued action.

And I, you said earlier, you know, you kind of lost some friendships because you were like, Hey, you know, I'm betting on myself right now. And I'm sure there was a lot of people around you who were jealous.

[00:33:19] Topsie Vandenbosch: success. They do. And you know, I also have really, cause I talk a lot about jealousy too, in my work and really normalizing that emotion.

Because I believe that we were meant to feel the full spectrum of emotions. It's just about the way we handle it. Right. So for me, when I notice, I feel jealous or envious, cuz that happens, I see somebody who is where I want to be. And I'm like, Oh, I'm doing some type of way. I start to really look at myself like, what is this teaching me?

What's the part of me that needs to be loved. That is being showcased through my feelings of being threatened in some way. And is this act. True. And what can I learn from this? What can I learn from them? So I think it's really good for us to sit with our feelings, cuz a lot of us are afraid to feel jealousy.

What about y'all? Where do y'all stand on that topic? I feel

[00:34:15] Topsie Vandenbosch: I'm, I luckily I guess I don't,

[00:34:30] Topsie Vandenbosch: want that.

Which so then how do

[00:34:36] Topsie Vandenbosch: Right. So we let's start working towards that goal. I love that. I love that. So you acknowledge it and then you move on to what is gonna get you towards the goal that you discovered that you wanted.

What about you, Kim? I'm so curious. Yeah,

Worried about the outcome. And so I just made a decision that at that time, that type of jealousy didn't serve me. Yeah. But I could admire people and I could have, I love it. You know, I could have people that I looked up to whose career I was like, wow, that's exactly what I wanna do. And I took that. It's the same thing, made the roadmap and was like, okay, if this is what they're doing, what do I wanna do?

And how do I get there? You know,

[00:35:55] Corinne Foxx: And, and shifting and being happy for people. You know, being happy for people's success and not saying I love that, that I was also realizing that there is opportunity for everyone, everybody there is not, you know, everyone there's so much, especially right now, there's so much TV going on. I mean, there's always the right thing for you will come to you.

[00:36:15] Corinne Foxx: that, but I really, I wanna talk about your courses because you brought up at the top that you're, you're making a new one, right?

[00:36:23] Topsie Vandenbosch: do with you. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. So, so I'm a mindset and emotional intelligence coach, which means that I help business owners identify and crush the negative thought patterns that are preventing them from being able, able to show up powerfully in their business.

So I help them do that using evidence-based coaching skills. So I have a lot of coaching. Skills and also through, um, my one-on-one, um, one-on-one coaching group coaching, the whole shebang. And so I work with all entrepreneurs who are, you know, scaling to six, seven figures and they are just having these doubts about themselves and the way that they feel about themselves and their expertise and wondering whether they're matters, even though they, they feel like they're just like any everyone else, but that's not the truth.

And so these are the individuals that really wanna do. More leadership work, maybe it's with their teams and really being able to hear negative feedback or feedback about their leadership that maybe they wouldn't have been open to before, but emotional intelligence that work that I do with them, it allows for them to feel comfortable to receive a.

Kind of difficult feedback about, um, you know, human behavior and about the way that they lead people. So I work with people in a couple of capacities leaders in their teams and helping them develop emotional intelligence skills, which means the ability to understand, perceive and manage your own emotions and be able to understand, perceive and manage other other people's because it's a, it's a dance.

You have to know how to read people, read the room, you have to know how to respond effectively in a way that truly honors the whole person. So there are a multitude of ways you can work with me. I have a program I'm launching it for the fifth time. I've had over 120 students inside of it. It's called destroy the mindset drama.

And it's a continuing education program. Teaching business owners. Evidence based coaching skills. So if you are a business owner that coaches in any capacity that coaches clients in any capacity, you could really benefit. I talk about the line between coaching therapy, how to know when a client is having mental health struggles, how to identify when they're a good F.

Fit to be able to work with you and really be able to benefit from, um, your work in the world. So if you guys go to the show notes, you can get on my email list, go to my website under the work with me tab. And there are so many ways I have the application to work with me there. There's so many different ways that you can connect with me.

If you wanna work with me on that. And I'm most active on Instagram. Amazing.

[00:38:49] Topsie Vandenbosch: by the stories I am. You know, what's really interesting. Being a business owner now is so different in the online world than it was in 2017 because oh yeah. People wanna be entertained.

Yeah. Mm-hmm right. We're seeing that with TikTok. With reels. And I just made a post yesterday and I was just like static posts on Instagram are apparently not getting the reach that they used to get. We started, I need to be upside down twerking to get y'all to pay attention. Honestly, we, I love to be entertained.

[00:39:28] Natalie McMillan: will say. But I wanted to ask one more question cuz I know we've gotta go. Of course.

[00:39:34] Natalie McMillan: else with their limiting beliefs. Yeah. Do you have any that you would share that you're working on right

So I think being able to work with more leaders in their teams, like I have I've done it, but it's always very interesting because people don't like to hear. Feedback at all for the most part, unless it's positive from their team members. And I know in corporate, that's why a lot of people leave corporate jobs is because no one fucking cares about your feedback and that's how you lose people.

So I would say my limiting belief is, is it possible to work with some of the big names that I really want to? So I would say that's one, like, who am I? Mm. Oh, this is hilarious to think about. The other one I would say is. You know what I think that's the main one. That's the main one. That's really big.

Who am head to do that. You how to do that. Yeah. And I

[00:40:32] Natalie McMillan: Yeah.

[00:40:36] Corinne Foxx: You that's the combating thought combat.

[00:40:41] Topsie Vandenbosch: one's gonna do it, why can't I.

[00:40:45] Topsie Vandenbosch: I can tell and I fucking love it. Love it. Why not? You? We love we stand therapy over here. We stand there. Thank you guys for having me. This has been so much fun.

[00:40:59] Topsie Vandenbosch: Oh my gosh. You too.

[00:41:10] Natalie McMillan: force? You know what the other thing is. So Karen and I came in today and we're both like, kind of tired it's end of the week. We've had like a big week. Immediately energized.

[00:41:20] Topsie Vandenbosch: I needed. She's so fun. Yes. I feel like we should have asked what her astrological sign

Cuz very fiery back to the

[00:41:32] Natalie McMillan: sad to me,

Bullinger

[00:41:48] Corinne Foxx: Bullinger bowling champagne. We've been drinking this episode. What do we, what we think.

[00:41:58] Corinne Foxx: you wanna talk about her hot? Yeah. Um, so our hot this week is Jessica Chastain. A 12. Oh, oh my God. I mean, she's like chisel she's so gosh, beautiful, stunning.

But the reason that we picked her is that she has publicly spoken about her imposter syndrome. Her she's quoted saying, I always think I'm gonna get. Fired. Everyone keeps telling me you get fired from at least one set in your life. And I haven't been fired yet. I've been fired on little things, but nothing big.

So now every time I'm on set, I'm like this could be the one and I can, I honestly feel her. I know her because yeah, it is scary. Especially as an actor, it's like, yeah, you're just job to job. So you're constantly fi you're always fired at the end of a job. And then you're like, well, I don't have a job again.

Well, it

[00:42:51] Topsie Vandenbosch: for zero dark 30? Oh, she probably did. Like, she she's like Molly's

[00:43:01] Corinne Foxx: And the, the other thing I was telling you now, when, when we picked her, is that like a lot of people don't know that Jessica chestain had an incredibly.

Difficult upbringing. Oh my God. And, um, yeah. And she's like overcome so much to get to where she is. Yeah. And like, she was, I think homeless and not a very like toxic family life. And it's just like, you never know what people have been through. No. Um, and how much

[00:43:26] Corinne Foxx: So we love her. We stand her. She's relatable. She's beautiful. She's talented. She's all the thing. She's a 12 1, 2 Jessica Chastain. What do we feel about this champagne? We've been drinking bowling,

[00:43:43] Corinne Foxx: I really like it a lot. It's

[00:43:46] Corinne Foxx: a good champagne.

I'm gonna give it a nine. Oh, okay.

[00:43:51] Corinne Foxx: an eight. Okay. So eight and a half, eight and a half out of Jessica. It's Jessica chasing.

All right. This is the part of the episode. We're play a little wrap up game. And this week we're playing 200 questions. No, we're not answering 200 questions. We're picking a question, went through 200 and they get more spicy to go back to the more spicy, more spicy as a. The the higher they get, so, okay. So now wait, hold on.

Let me get this up.

[00:44:24] Corinne Foxx: I know. Okay. So one through 200 NA okay. Well,

[00:44:36] Corinne Foxx: Oh, this is a great question for you. This is an amazing question for you.

Oh my gosh. I'm nervous. What have you created that you are most proud of? Oh, Jesus. Like a physical product. You think it says in the description, it can be something big, something small, something physical or something immaterial. Hmm. What have

Like the people I have in my life. I'm very proud of cuz it's very intentional who I have in my life. And it's just like such a wonderful group of people. So I'm proud of that. But I think also I'm just, I am proud of my business, which is very topical cuz it feels like I shouldn't

I know. It's it cheer. Like, you

[00:45:31] Corinne Foxx: what I mean? Oh my gosh. Yes, you should be. I'm proud of you. Thank

[00:45:37] Topsie Vandenbosch: I've, I literally

So that's something to be

proud

[00:45:47] Corinne Foxx: Yes. You created your business. I created my business and a family, a little family. Okay. Pick, oh, I don't know if my answers is gonna be like, I got I'll pick a number. Um, should I do it to 1 47,

[00:46:13] Corinne Foxx: Oh, I feel like I can answer this. I feel like I'm pretty famous for gifts. I feel like I give pretty good gifts. Yeah. I don't know. Yeah. I don't know. Rick, be second guessing. Why? Oh, I don't know. I feel like, I don't know. I, I go out my, my super thoughtful. Yeah. I go out my way to be super thoughtful. I don't really give generic gifts.

I. Spend a lot of time. And I, now I think I'm at a point where people expect that for me, they're like, oh my mom, like for Christmas, she's like, oh, Karin, I can't wait to see what you're gonna get me. And I'm like,

I

Yeah.

[00:46:56] Natalie McMillan: is. Making talent a unique character trait. I mean, it is, you are very good at giving gifts. Yeah, that is hard to do character trait. Unique character trait.

I mean, I just see you

[00:47:10] Corinne Foxx: Yeah. But like aren't we

[00:47:16] Corinne Foxx: yeah. That's what I would say. That's what I would say. I love that. Well, you guys don't forget. We have a newsletter that you can sign up for on am I doing this right? pod.com. If you don't wanna miss an episode, sign up, we send one email a week.

It's fine. It's cute. There's gifts. Also, if you guys have a. Need advice. Mm-hmm something's going on in your life. Personal professional, wherever, whatever you can write in at am I doing this right? Pot, gmail.com. And we will give you our, I always wanna say unsolicited, but that is it's literal. It's solicited.

We will give you our

[00:47:53] Corinne Foxx: anonymously, always, always. Well, thank you guys for listening to this week's episode and we'll be back next week with another episode. Love you all love