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You’re listening to The Voice of Dog.
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This is Rob MacWolf, your fellow traveler,
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and Today’s story is
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“Merry Christmas, Professor Nemesis”
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by Buddy Goodboy,
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he/him, whose social media, stories, and art you can find listed on his Linktree.
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Read by Solomon Harries,
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the Cuddly Badger Dad.
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Please enjoy “Merry Christmas, Professor Nemesis”
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by Buddy Goodboy
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Apex glided through the sky at subsonic speed toward Professor Nemesis’ mountain lair.
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No need to rattle any windows on a holiday, after all.
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As the thought crossed his mind, infrared lasers from the foothills tracked onto him.
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Subterranean launch platforms spat missiles in swarms.
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The roar drowned out his super-hearing.
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He dove and swerved to avoid the first wave
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—not too good a turn radius on these models
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—only to see them arc around to follow him.
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Guided by the lasers, no doubt.
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Apex squinted, and electromagnetic waves flowed in a torrent from his eyes,
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then narrowed and focused to a specific frequency.
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Sure enough, the missiles veered to follow Apex’s signal and slammed back into their own launchers.
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Apex touched down at Professor Nemesis’ front door.
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The gargantuan titanium skull rising out of the mountain was crushed in places.
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One eye lit up a sickly green.
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Apex turned up toward it and arched an eyebrow.
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“Missiles?” he said for the benefit of the camera
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no doubt tunneling data back to the professor.
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“Those haven’t been effective against me for fifty years.
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You might as well come out and talk, Nemesis.”
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The mouth of the skull yawned open.
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open.A shrunken, greying scientist in badly oversized lab clothes decorated in a green skull motif shuffled out to meet Apex.
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“A mad scientist’s budget doesn’t stretch like it used to,” he coughed.
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Apex reached out a hand toward Professor Nemesis.
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“You kept your word. Every dollar spent trying to kill me matched by a charitable donation.
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And no innocents endangered.”
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Nemesis slapped Apex’s hand away.
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“As if I would endanger the innocent.
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My quarrel is with you, you monkey.”
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He gave a wet, wracking cough and doubled over.
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“No using—“ he started.
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“No using your micro vision to diagnose me. You promised.”
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“I wish you would let me
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—“ “I let you do enough.”
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Nemesis’ eyes watered.
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“Every year, I let you condescend to me,
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and you get stronger,
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and I get older.” Apex offered his hand again.
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This time, Nemesis took it without looking.
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They were silent together.
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“I will kill you,” Nemesis said finally.
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“Merry Christmas, Professor Nemesis.”
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This was “Merry Christmas, Professor Nemesis”
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by Buddy Goodboy”,
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read for you by Solomon Harries,
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the Cuddly Badger Dad. You can
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find more stories on the web at thevoice.
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thevoice.dog, or find the show wherever you get your podcasts.
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This concludes our 2023 broadcast year,
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but we hope to see you again at the fireside,
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for another story,
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in the new year. Happy Holidays,
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and on behalf of myself,
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Khaki your faithful fireside companion,
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all of our fellowship of readers,
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and all those writers who have contributed their stories
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to be read: Thank you
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for listening to The Voice
