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From Mealtime Woes to Home CEO: Wrapping up Theresa’s Story
Episode 9 • 17th May 2024 • No Shame In The Home Game • Joyful Support Movement
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In this episode, we wrap up Theresa's journey, discussing the significant progress and insights gained from our time together. Theresa shares her struggles and triumphs in meal planning and food preparation, revealing how parallel play, communication, and a flexible yet structured approach have led to meaningful changes in her household. We explore the power of being open to new solutions for longstanding issues, the importance of including family in problem-solving, and how creating a supportive, joyful environment can lead to personal growth and improved family dynamics. We also touch on the impact of scheduling, snack options, and leveraging community resources like neighbors and family for support. Our episode concludes with a moment of gratitude, reflecting on the personal and collective achievements throughout this journey.

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Transcripts

Lacey:

Welcome to No Shame in the Home Game, the podcast that cares

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how your home feels, not looks.

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I'm Laci, the podcaster

who's got a bold lip today.

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I know you can't see me,

but I have a very bold lip.

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So I'm feeling very, sassy

because when I have a bold lip,

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I'm sassy, warning you all.

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Along with Sarah, who complimented

my bold lip, my fellow co

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. Sara: I actually don't

know what pop out means.

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I hear the young and say it, but when I

saw your bold lip, I was like, pop out.

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I don't know.

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What does pop out mean?

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Lacey: Doesn't it pop off?

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Sara: when something's a pop out.

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I thought that was a phrase.

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Lacey: it is.

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I don't know.

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Sara: Actually can't,

this is not sexual nature.

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I actually can't stop looking

at your lips because no.

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It's just so nice.

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The coloring of the office and your hair

and your outfit contrasted with the lip.

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It's like a perfect, it's just, it's

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Lacey: I'm going to take

a squad shot right now.

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Sara: All right.

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So if anyone's curious what that

looks like, you can go to our social

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media and see the pop out lip stain.

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I also very quickly in mother mode was

like, do not get that on your clothes.

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Lip stain sounds like it is

not coming out of your clothes.

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Lacey: I put, it's a thing.

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Don't worry.

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we are wrapping up Theresa's story

today, which obviously is near and

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dear to Sarah's heart, because She

and Sarah have been friends for a

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while, but, I just, I feel like I

saw so much of myself in Teresa.

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And she's also just so delightful that

hearing her story and wrap up and how

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much she got out of this experience

has given me all of the home tingles.

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Sara: all tingles and

there has been so much.

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Off air that we could basically

have two more episodes by now,

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because she is building on it.

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She's taking what we've talked about.

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She's building on it.

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We've already had a couple of

hiccups, and we've talked about it.

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Okay, this is why this is important.

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How about if we add this part in?

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And I already said to her, I'm like,

Do you want to talk about this now

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or record this for bonus content?

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And in true Teresa form, she's like,

Well, my may is very full with and

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then she rattled off all these things.

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And I was like, No, let's just help.

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Yeah, that sounds very

much like Teresa's life.

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Let's just help you now.

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this is very much just the

wrapping of her story with us.

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But please know, Teresa is

taking and running with this.

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in so many different ways.

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it's beautiful.

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And I hope we can bring her

back and talk about it more

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Lacey: Yeah, I cannot wait.

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And I will say, as you were talking, I

was like, how cool is it that, she's your

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friend and you get that ongoing support?

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And then I was like, wait, anybody

who joins this joyful support

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village can ask these questions

and get this kind of support.

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if you do home CEO, join the village,

you're going to be able to have.

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That's support from Sarah, which I

know Tyra was like, Sarah's magic.

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I say Sarah's magic.

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I agree.

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Sara: this isn't just my work.

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This is my passion.

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I love figuring out solutions.

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I love figuring out

solutions that help people.

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So doing this inside the village.

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It will be so much fun for me.

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, please come ask questions.

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Let's problem solve together

because that's my jam, baby.

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Lacey: yeah.

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And then all in membership, you get

access to all of our courses and the

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village for 150 a year, which I feel like.

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It's a really good price

because Home CEO itself is 99.

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Look at us doing the hard

sell in the beginning.

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I do, we do mean it though.

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I was telling someone the other

day, I'm like, how cool is it that

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I'm trying to make joy my job?

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so we're passionate about this.

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And also Sarah can't help.

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she tries to help

herself when it comes to.

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One of my favorite things is when I'm

complaining about something and Sarah's

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like, can I give you a suggestion?

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She's very good about asking, but

I just love, like, she's I see it.

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I know how to, I have an idea.

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Let's try.

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Sara: It is that and that's part

of our human, my human design.

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I was gonna say the way we

met was through human design.

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Part of what I learned is that I

need to wait for the invitation.

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And I've realized sometimes

when people are talking about a

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frustration, that isn't always

the invitation for a solution.

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So I have to be very careful about

making sure there's an invitation there.

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but yeah, as soon as

there's an invitation.

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I'm an avalanche of ideas.

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Lacey: And I love everything about it.

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I also love how excited

you get when an idea works.

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When I told you about our communication

center, you were like, what?

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You were so excited.

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Sara: Cause it's it's

like being a proud mama.

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Like it went out into the world and it did

something and that 1 percent joy ripple.

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I mean, that's really exciting.

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Lacey: we're going to go ahead

and jump into Teresa's story.

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You'll see Sarah and I on the other

side where we'll do a moment of

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gratitude, but first let's celebrate

Teresa and her awesome progress.

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Mhm.

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Lacey: Hi and hello.

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We're back with our participant, Teresa.

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Hi, Teresa.

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Theresa: Lacey.

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Lacey: And this is our, third

and final episode with you.

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So we get to kind of see what worked,

what didn't, which you'll keep using

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in the future and that kind of stuff.

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So I'll kick it over to Sarah

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to get us started.

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,

sara_1_04-10-Sara: okay.

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When I get excited, I

say, okay, three times.

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Okay.

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Okay.

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Okay.

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There's so much, there's so much,

I don't even know where to start.

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So let's just start with what I can

hear, which Laci doesn't know about.

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So our first episode with Teresa,

we talked about everything she takes

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care of and everything in her house.

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And it has changed from

episode one to episode three.

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So Teresa.

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What else are you taking care of

in your house besides the humans?

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What animals are now in your house?

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Theresa: I know, it

feels like we start over.

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Okay, so I have a husband, a daughter,

three kitties, a golden retriever

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that's two, and a golden retriever that

today, his birthday is 17 weeks old.

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Lacey: Thank you.

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Theresa: And we just added baby chicks to

our household because, you know, why not?

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And they're awesome.

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They're not that hard.

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that's the chicks in the background.

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They haven't made it to their new

coop yet, but everyone in our family

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has, a job around the chickens and

everyone's been true to their job so far.

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So that's a big thumbs up.

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husband's taking care of

structures and I was very clear.

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I was like, this will be too much for

me if I have to manage animals that

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will kill other animals like cats or

killing birds or dogs, killing birds.

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And I'm okay with adding another

chore to my daily routine.

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That's outside because

I go out there anyway.

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So I'll take care of feeding and

watering them, but not structures.

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And Shannon of course took the fun jobs.

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Research.

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On structures, and care,

and collecting eggs.

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And she's been completely true to that.

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And she has been helping me

with food, water, and safety.

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So I have been sleeping with

a little puppy and chicks in

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the sunroom for a couple weeks.

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So slumber party at my house.

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Lacey: That brings me so much joy.

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Theresa: So I'll just show

you, they've had, a temporary

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home, an intermediate home.

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So temporary first home was like a little,

Just a box from, like a storage box.

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And then we changed to an outdoor

baby pool with chicken wire.

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And then behind me, Richard

and Shannon built a coop.

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That's awesome that they did

research about and big win.

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Richard did not build

it like out of scraps.

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or going to the hardware store

and getting new material.

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He purchased a designed thing so that he

could still, take part in life and not be

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working every weekend on a new structure.

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I was proud of him for choosing that

and super excited that it's ready to

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go because life happens in two weeks.

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They need to go out and we have a

structure, so it's not chaotic and

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there's no one killing anybody else.

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sara_1_04-10-Sara: So I want to

highlight a couple of things.

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One, this is very much the Teresa I've

known during our entire friendship.

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Just that very much let's

go all in into this.

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which is just adorable.

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And I love that too, is I'm going to

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really highlight that.

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I feel as though you used a

lot of the home CEO tenants

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with this new chicken project.

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As a family, you decided and as a family,

you also delegated, you are responsible

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for this aspect, as a home, but I, what

I heard you say was you were very clear.

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I'm can't do this all on

my own, but we can do this.

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So to me, that's very much the home CEO,

recognizing the scope and then making

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sure all the pieces are coming together.

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I really feel like that's

actually a huge thing for you.

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I hope you're acknowledging

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Theresa: Yeah, I do.

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I really smile on it.

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And there had been talk of chickens

at our house when we moved here,

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because, we live in the country.

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we have neighbors with

chickens and, so it would fit.

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And I was the holdout.

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I was like, no, I don't

think I can handle it.

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And I'm not convinced that everyone

will be available to, to participate.

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they had been interested and I

was like, I'm ready and here's,

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what I think will happen.

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what do you think?

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And everyone said yes.

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And we walked down and

picked out our chicks.

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And Shannon had already done all

the research and they had already

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been visiting the chick place.

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They were just waiting for me

to say yes, but no pressure.

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Like I could have said no.

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or just let it go, like kids

are excited about something

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and you're like, that'll pass,

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Lacey: Yeah.

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sara_1_04-10-Sara: I'm very happy for

you and the process and the structure

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and everything that went into that.

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I will remind our listeners.

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We Started with you focusing on meals,

meal planning, meal prep, food, prep, and

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I feel like we've come a long way, baby.

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I feel like we've come a real long way.

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So if you want to highlight, I've

got plenty of notes I can highlight,

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but I want to just hear from your

point of view, where do you feel like

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you are now versus when we started?

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Theresa: for sure, my

mindset is better, for sure.

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There's no question.

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I really see that.

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And I get, I have less

anxiety about the meal prep.

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I have more new tools in the process.

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I see successes here and there.

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I also see the same struggles.

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I see, the same struggles.

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still happening.

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It's not like it's all gone.

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I remember from last episode I

was so excited about a certain

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new tool like the salad drawer.

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And I was like, Oh, I'm worried now.

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Like all that excitement.

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And then I was like, you know what?

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This can happen to me and other people.

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I'm super excited about something.

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This is going to solve it.

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And then what happens?

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What if I'm going to be inconsistent?

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And I, Lacey, I remember you saying

It's okay not to be perfect, right?

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And I kept hearing that because

Sarah, you know, I kept reporting, I

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haven't updated the salad drawer yet.

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I'm going to try and get to it.

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Meanwhile, there were all these

other successes happening.

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So it was like, how about I shift away

from this myopic look at what has to

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happen in order for me to be successful

and see what's actually unfolding.

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So maybe I just start there with the

update, parallel play at dinners,

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which is a real tool that you and I

talked about is definitely happening.

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So whether I take one focus of the dinner.

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And I'm more fit for the each one of us.

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I'm getting much better at thinking

like that and even opening my

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mindset to , this is how I roll.

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This is consistent with me.

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. It's okay to make multiple things

for a family at dinner time.

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It doesn't have to be, you get

what you get and you don't get

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upset every night, and on the

days that I'm working, it's fine.

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I have really definitely let go much more.

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I even don't prepare

a meal in the morning.

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If I can, I will, but I don't

expect that of myself all the time.

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And Shannon and I just talk a lot more

about what the options are, and she

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has definitely been very supportive.

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a helpful contributor to my process

for sure, appropriately in the way

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that matches authentically for her.

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so we keep playing with that and I

feel like there's a lot more wins

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between Shannon and I around the

food she knows it's an issue, she

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knows that I've struggled with it.

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She has homework for me around reading the

salt, fat, acid, heat book, like she would

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love it if I could embrace that, growing

in becoming a better cook, not just

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solving an issue of having food available,

but, Hey mommy, don't you think that it

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would be fun if you made really healthy,

yummy food and, got awesome at it.

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As opposed to just, limping along.

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that's been good.

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We actually sit and read

chapters of that book.

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And, on quiet days, that's one of

the things we did over vacation.

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It was like, we read that book and we

made food from there and talked about it.

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And we're slowly going through it.

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It's not oh, I gotta finish this

in three months or something.

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It's like layers, lots of layers.

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Which is truly authentic to me, for sure.

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I don't.

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change quickly a lot of the times,

even though I add a lot fast.

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those are some things that have happened.

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Oh, wait.

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And another thing is that my

husband and my daughter, when I'm

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working, they do a lot more problem

solving about what's for dinner.

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And, they have more places that

they go to get food without

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being so elaborate in the budget.

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I know that in the beginning I was

super excited about how I could

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pick up something from six different

restaurants around my workplace.

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I don't do that anymore.

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It's just too expensive and, and people

weren't enjoying it as much as I was.

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So I use it for me.

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And even then I'm like, I get, I

give myself lots of permission to go

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and get whatever I want for dinner.

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But most of the time I just choose to

eat my leftovers and I don't go and spend

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money on something around the corner.

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And I take a lot of examples from,

like Sweet Greens is this salad place

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that we can go to and those are things

I have in the drawer or in the house.

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even if my salad drawer is adding a

little here and there, I have some

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new ideas and yeah, we're doing well.

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We're doing a lot better with it.

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A lot better in different

corners of the process.

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Lacey: Can I just give you the biggest

kudos ever as a mom with younger children

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to hear you talk about that you are co

creating this system with your daughter,

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that she gets to be a part of it in a

way that feels good for her, that you're

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showing her that this is a problem

area for you, but you're working on it

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and she can be part of that process.

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Ooh, I might cry.

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I just think there is so much magic

in that parenting and in that system.

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There is so much magic in that and I am so

impressed I just, you're setting her up

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for such success in future life right now.

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And, way to go.

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That's so cool.

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Theresa: And even if my salad

drawer, which I'm just going to

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focus on for a bit, cause I think

it's so typical for either me and

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maybe other people like to fixate on

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one tool.

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Yeah.

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It's that's.

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That's what will make me successful.

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This cool Pinterest thing

that I manifested or made

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happen in my house, too.

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I still aim for it.

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There's still a spot for

it in my refrigerator.

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I still have those little containers.

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We still try to work on them.

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Lacey, I'm hearing you.

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that's not what we set out to do.

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I didn't set out to create a project with

my daughter and that's what's happening.

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And then Sarah, I also texted you a

picture of something that's happening

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between Shannon and I that's adding

a new curious layer for me is that

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she's trying to explore different

diet and different exercise.

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options.

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first episode, I had a pretty intense

schedule that I was reporting, right?

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up super early in the

morning with figure skating.

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figure skating season is over, but

also we as a family have chosen

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not to return to figure skating.

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So Shannon was on the synchronized skate

team, and she really wanted to do that.

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That's over and we decided that

we wouldn't invest in that any

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longer, which was a big loss for her

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and But she was actually part of the

decision making and so now she's moving

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on to What will I do next for my exercise?

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And she has some ideas and I You know,

I'm just so excited to see her doing

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this and we had to talk about you don't

have to be rigid about it, okay, that's a

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great plan and I'm totally going to help

you, but I can't sign on for all of this.

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I'll do my best.

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Lacey: Get it girl.

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It's like a full like plan

with some images that she drew.

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I love that.

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Theresa: So today is I'm

forgetting what today is.

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I know the exercise is

meditation on Sunday.

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The exercise was hiking, which we did.

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And I started her on that.

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I love to run, but I can't really do it.

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I have a foot issue, but we've started,

she's been working on some stuff.

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Anyway, this is like going in a

tangent of other stuff, but I'm like

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supporting her and she's supporting me.

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And we're just in the food

things, total parallel play.

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Like I have great examples from the week.

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Sunday was liquided, liquid diet,

and I'm this is Sunday, the day

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we're supposed to be exploring.

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I'm like, I'm gonna make some

salmon and play with that

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salt, fat, acid, heat business.

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If you want to put it in the

blender, you're welcome to.

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And she was like, nah, it's okay.

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I think I'll just eat it regular.

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I'm like, yeah, we had fun.

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We had smoothies for breakfast and

lunch, and we're having a dinner.

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That's okay with you?

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Great.

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we'll move on.

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And then the next day was

vegetarian, and then no sugar.

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And I told her, I'm like, how did

you do with the no sugar date?

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We actually are pretty good about

not having sugar in the house.

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But she was like, Oh, I made strawberries

and chocolate for dessert at home.

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I'm like, okay, how was that?

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She was like, this is really good.

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I'm like, that's great.

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I had a candy bar next to my food bag at

work all day, and I don't know why it was

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there, but I said no, because today is

sugar free day, and she's good job, mom!

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we, there was no shaming about

food, which, that is my rule.

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Do not shame me about food,

because I won't have it.

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Mhm.

377

:

Mhm.

378

:

sara_1_04-10-Sara: This is, to me, this

is an all around when it's not about

379

:

creating this hard and fast solution.

380

:

The salad drawer was an

amazing inspiration, but it's

381

:

not that was the solution.

382

:

You, what you're discovering is, I

always talk about this balance between

383

:

structure and flow, You, you had

384

:

a lot of flow.

385

:

You wanted everything to be like.

386

:

Oh, let's just see what happens.

387

:

And that was actually creating tension.

388

:

And now you've created this structure

that has all this flexibility in it.

389

:

And you're loosening around that

mindset of it has to be a certain

390

:

way into this growth mindset

of this voyage of discovery.

391

:

And what I love is including Shannon.

392

:

You're not showing her,

this is what you do, right?

393

:

It's not rigid.

394

:

It is, how do you problem solve?

395

:

How do you come up with

something that feels good to you?

396

:

You're showing her how to create

a solution, not what the solution

397

:

is, which is really the whole core

premise of all the work that I do.

398

:

I'm never telling somebody, What to do.

399

:

It's more about discovering

what works for you.

400

:

And everything has a rhythm, right?

401

:

Shannon's going to try out

these different eating styles.

402

:

You're discovering this book right now.

403

:

The salad drawer had a hot week or

two, and it's quiet now, but everything

404

:

has a rhythm and now you've got

all of these things to go back to.

405

:

I always talk about the scaffolding.

406

:

You're not.

407

:

Abandoning the salad drawer.

408

:

It's still there.

409

:

It's just not your main focus.

410

:

And that's fine.

411

:

Cause you've got chickens and two

dogs and three cats, and you've got

412

:

plenty of other things going on.

413

:

But again, bringing Shannon in,

you're really showing her how to

414

:

adapt to situations and solutions.

415

:

And I just, I think that's amazing.

416

:

And I feel like you

really got to the core of.

417

:

What this can be.

418

:

. I love how you said this is how I roll.

419

:

Like I just, I can hear

you so much more relaxed.

420

:

The beginning, that first episode

was a lot of tension around being

421

:

perfect at being exact, at being right.

422

:

It being, I'm failing, and it's just

like now it's just that exploration.

423

:

It's more playful, is what I'm hearing.

424

:

Really?

425

:

Does it feel a little playful?

426

:

Theresa: Yeah, and I think one of the

tenants of I say, maybe success or

427

:

contributions that Sarah, you have

made is the concept of parallel play.

428

:

that's one of the real big take

home messages for me is that,

429

:

whether We've identified, and I

still have my list of the favorites.

430

:

Remember that homework assignment?

431

:

Who likes what?

432

:

and I have the worksheet about

what the food outline could be.

433

:

You know how I could document it more to

really create the scaffolding as a map.

434

:

That's I really think about.

435

:

And when you think about, you maybe write

about, and when you write about, you maybe

436

:

solidify the brain patterns around it.

437

:

I just intuitively now intuitively

work at power parallel play.

438

:

And I can parallel with, okay, Shannon

wants a different focus every day.

439

:

And that can actually be my parallel play.

440

:

center point even.

441

:

It's okay, how do I parallel

play around no sugar today?

442

:

For all of us.

443

:

And I know what my husband prefers.

444

:

I know what I prefer.

445

:

I know what Shannon is aiming

for and I can pivot around that.

446

:

In fact, it actually gives me really

great structure because on my own, I don't

447

:

like to decide things for other people.

448

:

And that's been part of the issue.

449

:

, I don't know how to make an all meat

every day experience for my husband.

450

:

And I also don't know how to please

myself around the more vegetable

451

:

I'm this mindset of parallel play.

452

:

Yeah.

453

:

It's more playful.

454

:

It's parallel playful.

455

:

So I'm really excited about that.

456

:

I just want to also say that I remember

mentioning also early on that my

457

:

sister in law Helped me with chicken.

458

:

Do you guys remember me

saying that during kovat?

459

:

I was like, oh Look, she's making chicken

pot pie Like how do you cook your chicken

460

:

and we had a whole dialogue about that

and I've never forgotten how to cook

461

:

chicken and the experience that she

and I or the conversation that we had.

462

:

And now I won't forget parallel

play, in my kitchen because of

463

:

us, and other things though.

464

:

There are other things, other wins that

have come from the last three months.

465

:

So yeah, it is more playful.

466

:

It's more lighthearted.

467

:

I roll with it, more like I still get

what's for lunch, mom, what's for dinner.

468

:

Oh my gosh, I'm so hungry.

469

:

Or I make the food like,

Oh, I'm not hungry now.

470

:

I'm like, Oh, we're just playing,

but I have something to play

471

:

with, I'm lighter about it.

472

:

I'm really lighter.

473

:

And I just think it's okay.

474

:

I made this and I can use it tomorrow.

475

:

I made this.

476

:

still don't make dinner by three 30, but

there's always something in the house.

477

:

sara_1_04-10-Sara: And I'm glad that

you brought that up about the family's

478

:

communication around being hungry because

that was one of our, when we talk between

479

:

appointments or between episodes, we

do back and forth over Marco Polo.

480

:

And I did start to hear a common

thread of the family coming

481

:

to you when they were hungry.

482

:

And I wanted to propose the

idea of a communication center.

483

:

And it's not hard and fast, it's

not rigid, but I'm wondering if

484

:

there is an opportunity on the

days that you're home making meals.

485

:

Could there be a dry erase

board in the kitchen?

486

:

for lunch today I'm making

tomato soup and grilled cheese.

487

:

So if you're not sure where you want

to start, you can say, Oh, green beans

488

:

at approximately, again, not hard

and fast, but if you know you have

489

:

an appointment until one, just be

like, Oh, it'll be ready at one 30.

490

:

And on the days that you know,

dinner is going to be salmon

491

:

and rice and green beans.

492

:

You could put on their dinner, salmon,

rice and green beans ready at six 30.

493

:

And that way, if somebody wants to

help get it going faster, you can

494

:

say, Oh, you want to start the rice

then we'd be done 15 minutes earlier.

495

:

That way I always just think about

having a young child and learning how

496

:

to forecast for them so they're not

reacting and they're not surprised.

497

:

And really, I got, through that,

I learned how to really, outline a

498

:

lot of things that were going on.

499

:

And I'm just wondering if that

would be helpful for your family.

500

:

Does that seem like an opportunity or no?

501

:

Theresa: Yeah, because it's

already in my head, right?

502

:

So if I shared it.

503

:

that's just another data point for

the success of the family, I think.

504

:

and I thought about that the other

day, because we do have a dry erase

505

:

board in the kitchen that's blank.

506

:

It doesn't have anything on it.

507

:

And it's often been a place that we

can write things for groceries, but

508

:

I've pivoted to, I just put it in.

509

:

The grocery app, and I've encouraged

everyone to have the app on

510

:

their phone and add to the cart

because I could do that, right?

511

:

Lacey, isn't that like a tool?

512

:

Lacey: That's what we do.

513

:

we have a list that we can shout to

Alexa about, and then I transport

514

:

that into the, to the list for pickup.

515

:

So yes, but then when it is time to do

the pickup, my husband or I are like,

516

:

Hey, I'm going to place this order,

put whatever you want in, and then.

517

:

Yeah.

518

:

So I wholeheartedly agree

and endorse that method.

519

:

Theresa: And I think

520

:

less has been showing up on the whiteboard

because it's going right in the cart.

521

:

And that's a really new thing.

522

:

And I don't have to tell anybody when

I'm going to go pick it up because three

523

:

days a week, I could pick it up, right?

524

:

It's right around the corner from work.

525

:

sara_1_04-10-Sara: again,

that's that communication.

526

:

They can look on that app and see, Oh,

527

:

somebody already added this item.

528

:

Oh, Okay.

529

:

Mom is going to pick it

up sometime this week.

530

:

Cause it's already in the car.

531

:

And just an idea for the whiteboard.

532

:

And again, going back to that premise

of just try it, see what works.

533

:

If it doesn't work, try something else.

534

:

But because every day is

different in your house.

535

:

Between your work schedule,

Shannon's activities, sometimes

536

:

Richard's working at home.

537

:

Sometimes I know he's traveling,

and sometimes I know Shannon still

538

:

has activities like Girl Scouts.

539

:

So every day is truly different.

540

:

So in the morning, I feel

like AM is an anchor for you.

541

:

You get up, you have your warm beverage,

you're making breakfast, and then

542

:

just getting into the habit of every

morning writing down lunch, on your own.

543

:

and then just writing, mom, home, 9 p.

544

:

m.

545

:

dinner, you to hear some ideas

or you can figure it out.

546

:

if you know that there's ground

hamburger in the fridge, you could

547

:

write ideas, ground hamburger or soup.

548

:

And then that way they can

go, Oh, those are options.

549

:

Or, Oh, I'm not feeling that tonight.

550

:

And then again, on the days that you

are home, you can write down like Girl

551

:

Scouts 530 to 630 dinner will be a seven.

552

:

And this is what it is.

553

:

And that way everyone's on the same

page and it reduces, again, going

554

:

back to that home CEO premise, it

reduces you having all this information

555

:

in your head and giving them an

insight into what you already know.

556

:

So it reduces that friction point

and it's going to take some time

557

:

for them to get used to that.

558

:

But if it helps you, it's a tool.

559

:

I actually, I use a dry erase board and

I didn't realize how much the family

560

:

was, it started during the pandemic.

561

:

I used to go out.

562

:

We have two acres and I used to

563

:

go out on the property all the

time and my son got really upset

564

:

because he couldn't find me.

565

:

So I started writing like moms

at the woodshed moms, whatever.

566

:

And then I just started using it

for every day, what's going on.

567

:

And I always thought it was more

for me, so I didn't forget stuff.

568

:

And then people would like comment

on, it wasn't on the board.

569

:

And I'm like, Oh, we're all using, okay.

570

:

We are all using the board now.

571

:

I better lean into the, what

were you going to say, Teresa?

572

:

Theresa: maybe just that I had

thought about that yesterday, like

573

:

I thought about writing it on the

whiteboard and then I didn't have time

574

:

to put my hands to the whiteboard.

575

:

so I texted it to them.

576

:

we have a group chat for the three

of us on the days that Richard's

577

:

picking Shannon up from theater

or, when he has to be the person.

578

:

I don't get a lot of response from that.

579

:

I don't know if it's working or not,

but for me, that's a really good

580

:

time because I can talk it in there.

581

:

And I have so much that I think

of when I leave the house.

582

:

To communicate that detail

is really challenging for me.

583

:

To communicate it when I'm home

is also a little bit of anxiety.

584

:

I notice that what if it

doesn't happen at seven?

585

:

like I never really quite make my mark

and what I say I'm gonna make always is in

586

:

that playful state of I know I'm gonna be

making salmon but then what version of it

587

:

or I know I'm gonna take the ground beef

and I'm making those like playful Those

588

:

parallel dishes kind of thing for today

and tomorrow and for the various palates,

589

:

but I think I'm more moreover Yes, I

want to try that because whatever Pattern

590

:

we create people will get used to it.

591

:

It's like you teach people how

to treat you So it needs to be

592

:

communicated because there's a gap

And something will stick, ultimately,

593

:

because they'll get used to it.

594

:

And so will I.

595

:

Just like we're

596

:

super used to what lunches are.

597

:

I'm a rock star with lunches.

598

:

I have no problem making lunches.

599

:

And the salad drawer is a tool for

me at lunch, even if there's not

600

:

the vegetables always in there.

601

:

There's the egg salad, there's the

tuna, that has taken a new spot in the

602

:

refrigerator and I make more of it.

603

:

if I could do lunches, like I do, I

probably could do the other stuff.

604

:

sara_1_04-10-Sara: And again, it's

just coming back to trying something

605

:

like you perfectly articulated it.

606

:

filling in that gap, right?

607

:

And if there is some sort of gap that

could use some kind of structure and

608

:

I heard you say, Oh, I don't really

know what I'm going to make for dinner.

609

:

And it's okay, that's fine.

610

:

But if you know that Shannon's going

to be at Girl Scouts and you're

611

:

not going to get home until later.

612

:

at least let everybody know

dinner's gonna be on the later side.

613

:

that you do know.

614

:

And nobody's wondering,

Oh, I'm hungry at 5.

615

:

30.

616

:

Oh, dinner's not till 7.

617

:

Okay, I better eat something

out of the salad drawer.

618

:

at least that part of the gap is

filled in, even if you don't know

619

:

exactly what you're gonna make.

620

:

Theresa: How did you know

that is the pain point still?

621

:

It's and I should just correct, it's

not that I don't know what's for dinner.

622

:

I don't know exactly what's for dinner.

623

:

like I know what I'm, I know which, which

focal point I have, but you're right.

624

:

It's more about just communicating

that's when I'm going to be done.

625

:

With the effort of making dinner, it's

going to be at such and such a time.

626

:

But there is this pain point around from,

and you guys probably all, we all feel

627

:

this like from three 30 to six, when

everyone gets home, if there's not food

628

:

ready, it's stressful and uncomfortable.

629

:

Whether I know what it is or not, people

are, at my house, people are hungry,

630

:

sara_1_04-10-Sara: a couple of things.

631

:

One is the whole thing about not

knowing exactly what's for dinner

632

:

was in episode one, you wanted to be

able to create and you thrived off

633

:

of that, Oh, this all came together.

634

:

And that's that free spirit,

Teresa, that I know very dearly.

635

:

So I was trying to, I'm

not trying to change you.

636

:

I was trying to give you this allowance

to still have that creativity.

637

:

And still communicate to the

family so that they're not.

638

:

Left in the dark, but again, that

whole thing about being hungry, from

639

:

3 30 until dinner, I'm still curious

and maybe the whiteboard is an

640

:

opportunity if you're hungry before

dinner, there are apples, giving them

641

:

things to snack on before dinner.

642

:

I just know in my household, I'm

not interested in anyone telling me

643

:

they're hungry, not because I'm not

nice and caring and loving and kind,

644

:

but because everyone's got two hands

and eyes in my house and When my son

645

:

says I'm hungry, I'm like, okay, fruit,

vegetable, or protein figure it out.

646

:

Like fruit, we've always got,

apples and clementines, vegetables.

647

:

We've always got, carrots

and cucumbers, protein.

648

:

He can always grab some nuts.

649

:

So when he says that to me, , I just

redirect fruit, vegetable, or protein.

650

:

What do you want to have?

651

:

is there an opportunity to

give your family a bridge snack

652

:

between getting home at 3.

653

:

30 and having dinner?

654

:

What would that look like?

655

:

Theresa: Yes, and this is, for me

watching you do your magic is really fun.

656

:

oh yeah, communicate what the options

are before the question comes, because

657

:

I already know what the options are.

658

:

When someone says they're hungry,

I now know what my scaffold is.

659

:

I know what my dinner options,

660

:

I just want to say, did you notice this?

661

:

Cause I did in the beginning.

662

:

I wanted to like, have all sorts of

options for what dinner was and then land

663

:

on something and be super impressed with

my like nimbleness, Around not knowing

664

:

anything and then figuring out something.

665

:

Now, I'm like, I might not know exactly

from the little collection, but I know

666

:

it clusters around such and such, right?

667

:

So I have that map or that scaffolding,

and I have that creativity, that I

668

:

don't have to know exactly what it is.

669

:

I still get to be intuitive and

creative and playful and whimsical

670

:

with it, but it's within a collection.

671

:

And now you're saying, okay, what

about that time that whether you know

672

:

it or not is the pain point between

I already know what the options are.

673

:

I haven't communicated them to

you before you asked, but you

674

:

asked me and it's a trigger.

675

:

Like why do I have to solve this?

676

:

Now I have to, I'm hungry too.

677

:

Now I have to, in my hungry mode,

tell you what the options are.

678

:

Why don't I just put it down in the place

you can see, close my mouth, and point?

679

:

those are the options

right there, remember?

680

:

We put them up there.

681

:

Or, there are options.

682

:

there's not.

683

:

me being whimsical and you wondering

what the heck magic I'm going to pull

684

:

out and then have it be a disaster.

685

:

, the ultimate answer is yes.

686

:

But I am going to try the whiteboard.

687

:

I'm going to try a communication

688

:

tool around here are your options

and here's what I'm creating today.

689

:

And this is the time I'm aiming for it

when it's not obvious, especially Like

690

:

today, I'm home all day, and I'm gonna

have a great time with dinner tonight, And

691

:

I am not a good, communicator about the

692

:

schedule either.

693

:

Like, nobody knows the

schedule except for me.

694

:

Really, they learn about it on the fly.

695

:

sara_1_04-10-Sara: There's

so many ways to go.

696

:

Okay.

697

:

Perfect.

698

:

Perfect.

699

:

put a pin in that in the plant and you

knowing everything that's like a whole

700

:

that's a whole nother series arc of three

episodes, but The snacks in the very

701

:

beginning when we were trying to come

up with some meal ideas I asked you to

702

:

invite your family to write down their

favorite Vegetables, proteins, meals,

703

:

sides, things for the salad drawer.

704

:

And they were very open to

vocalizing what they liked.

705

:

So I'm seeing another opportunity

to put a list on the fridge and say,

706

:

Hey, everybody, what's something

you want to eat when you're

707

:

hungry and dinner's not ready yet?

708

:

Carrots and hummus, apples and

peanut butter, a handful of peanuts.

709

:

Get some information from them

and then that becomes part of

710

:

your scaffolding and your staples.

711

:

Like I know from my house I always

have hummus and carrots available.

712

:

Because that feels okay, it's going to

satiate me a little bit, but it's not

713

:

going to replace dinner or a cheese stick.

714

:

And I use the phrase with you and

it feels a little strong, but when

715

:

I, we were doing these Marco Polos

and I actually got to hear your

716

:

family come in and say, I'm hungry.

717

:

When is food?

718

:

What is food?

719

:

I actually got to hear it.

720

:

and I asked you, why are you the

gatekeeper between them and food?

721

:

That's fine.

722

:

If that's how your house is structured,

but I heard it as a pain point.

723

:

So again, giving them the tools to have

that intermediate snack before dinner,

724

:

but communicating with them what they

like and then having that snack list.

725

:

So when they say they're hungry,

you just point to the snack list

726

:

and then you're not going into your

brain going, Oh, what do I have?

727

:

What's available?

728

:

And just knowing, okay, I'm always

going to have pretzels available.

729

:

I'm always going to have carrots

in the salad drawer, right?

730

:

Does that sound that would

work for your family?

731

:

Theresa: Yeah, it does.

732

:

I can really see that.

733

:

That's a next.

734

:

Yes.

735

:

Yes.

736

:

And thank you, that's really helpful

for me to see the communication piece,

737

:

the letting go of the discomfort part,

because I do notice, and it was really

738

:

wise of you to ask me, like why am

I the gatekeeper, or just to explore

739

:

that, and I took time with it, I didn't

just have an answer automatically,

740

:

I'm like, yeah, why is that?

741

:

Can I get curious about

that and see why that is?

742

:

I do know that one of the things I

smile on about my gatekeeping of sorts

743

:

is that nurturer in me where, and I'm

proud of this, I am a person in my,

744

:

I see myself as someone who doesn't

have a lot of issues around food and I

745

:

very easily make a lot of choices that

reflect some wisdom and some energy.

746

:

healthy relationship to food.

747

:

So whether it's a controlling thing or

an inspirational thing, I like being

748

:

the mama who has some good things to

provide them around food, whether it's

749

:

mindset or options or actual meal.

750

:

And I think I've focused a lot on

the meal, but what if I was better

751

:

at communicating the options?

752

:

Because I don't want to

be controlling about it.

753

:

I want to help people in my house make

good choices that they feel good about

754

:

for their blood sugar and for their body.

755

:

and it's okay if they struggle

around that over time.

756

:

Like I'm not judgmental about doing that.

757

:

I'm always doing that right every day.

758

:

So communicating those options sounds

like another next level for me.

759

:

How do I help communicate

what the options are?

760

:

And how do I make it fun?

761

:

And how do I make it successful?

762

:

Like actually always consistently

having those things that they have

763

:

said are helpful to them because they

have been communicated to me and I

764

:

haven't been keeping them consistent.

765

:

Maybe there can be some kind of a

poster that we make where it's the

766

:

go to In between snacks that are

healthy and satisfying and they get

767

:

you through until, and just make it

more loving as opposed to a pain point.

768

:

I think that's something I want to

embrace is, look, we do smoothies.

769

:

Shannon can make them.

770

:

She makes them really well.

771

:

She puts protein powder in them.

772

:

She has a whole thing about them.

773

:

I don't always have the

ingredients for her to make that.

774

:

so what are the options without

it being the salad drawEr,

775

:

Mhm.

776

:

Mhm.

777

:

sara_1_04-10-Sara: again, I would

ask your family, what's a satiating

778

:

snack To hold you over get their

input but going back to the smoothies

779

:

if shannon's already interested

in smoothies That's a relatively

780

:

easily thing to always have on hand.

781

:

I call them the no brainers.

782

:

You can always have frozen

fruit in the freezer.

783

:

If you have bananas that are

about to go bad, chop them up

784

:

and put them in a plastic bag.

785

:

Anything can be dumped in frozen

blueberries, strawberries, bananas.

786

:

you can even do vegetables that can go

into a smoothie and then always having on

787

:

whatever the liquid issue wants to use.

788

:

Almond milk, cow's milk, whatever

she wants the liquid to be, then

789

:

always having the protein powder,

because that's shelf stable.

790

:

And then, like a peanut

butter or an almond butter.

791

:

So she could write up

a recipe of smoothies.

792

:

And when you have your grocery

list, making sure that some of those

793

:

staples are always on that list.

794

:

If she runs out of one of her smoothie

staples, Making sure she puts it on the

795

:

list so that a smoothie is always an

option and a smoothie is a great option.

796

:

She could make one smoothie

and divide it into three cups

797

:

for all three of you, right?

798

:

And that's pretty satiating

and holds you over.

799

:

and I just want to go back and

highlight especially for the listener

800

:

this whole thing that I'm talking

about with the gatekeeping And

801

:

keeping that in mind with the pain

802

:

point.

803

:

Okay.

804

:

If somebody chooses to be the gatekeeper

in their house of food, because that

805

:

is nutritionally very important or

even allergy related, there are very

806

:

important reasons to be the gatekeeper

of certain things in a house.

807

:

And I respect that.

808

:

The reason I brought it up was because.

809

:

I could clearly hear the pain point.

810

:

So I would only ever highlight

that issue if it is a pain point

811

:

for you or anybody listening.

812

:

And

813

:

I really heard

814

:

you say it isn't important to me

as the nurturer for the family.

815

:

You love doing breakfast and lunches.

816

:

And I hear that you love

making food for your family.

817

:

You love providing a meal

that they all love and enjoy.

818

:

But you said a sentence which was

when they come to me and they're

819

:

hungry and I'm also hungry.

820

:

then I'm mad because I'm having to

think of solutions when I'm also hungry.

821

:

So that's the pain point.

822

:

It's not no gatekeeper, all gatekeeper.

823

:

It's let's have a solution for this

scenario where I'm always going to make

824

:

sure these healthy options are available.

825

:

going back to structure and flexibility.

826

:

It's not about totally letting

go or totally being all in.

827

:

It's about having that

scaffolding and those options.

828

:

And I hope that's clear to you.

829

:

And I hope it's clear to the

listener that is part of being home.

830

:

CEO is seeing that global picture,

knowing the vision, knowing what

831

:

your family needs and wants, and then

giving autonomy where it can be given.

832

:

but allowing for all of that to happen.

833

:

So knowing Shannon wants to

make the smoothies and having

834

:

those ingredients available for

her, does that all make sense?

835

:

, Theresa: yes, it definitely makes sense.

836

:

I want to listen to you say all that

again because it resonated and it's wise.

837

:

it's.

838

:

Sarah, you're really good at this.

839

:

Lacey: Isn't she?

840

:

Theresa: Yes.

841

:

Like I didn't even think about

that pain point in the same way

842

:

that you just unraveled it really.

843

:

and the solution, which is really

authentic to us and others.

844

:

It's not just unique to me, but, yes.

845

:

Lacey: I wanted to ask you

Teresa, what is like your

846

:

biggest takeaway from doing this?

847

:

What are you, I have a feeling, I

know, but I'm going to, I want to

848

:

know, what are you like rah ing and you

would recommend maybe a listener try.

849

:

Theresa: my first reaction is, when

there's a pain point that looks like

850

:

it's a deep wound, more than just a pain

point with lots of tries around it, it's

851

:

possible to take another stab at it.

852

:

With a different kind of helper.

853

:

So I don't know if Sarah you remember

this But I know it's pretty clear

854

:

in my mind that this food prep

issue is not just like a willy

855

:

nilly What could Sarah help me with?

856

:

It's like this has been a struggle for

Years in my heart and in my household I've

857

:

tried a lot of ways to deal with it And

I think that I guess like it's possible

858

:

to try Again, in a new way, around a

long standing pain in the household.

859

:

So I guess that's the first thing.

860

:

And then the tangible things that I have

to take away from it are parallel play,

861

:

communication, new tools, not getting

too, fixated on a solution, but the fact

862

:

that the matter of really working on

solutions, I think that's, if someone

863

:

says time's up, I could be good with that.

864

:

that those are some pretty good highlights

for me about how it worked in the

865

:

last three months in a successful way.

866

:

And also, it's really nice

to have, call a friend.

867

:

Sarah, thank you for

868

:

being my friend.

869

:

And using your bright light to

870

:

help a

871

:

friend.

872

:

sara_1_04-10-Sara: well, and I

thank you for being open to this.

873

:

I've said it before in a previous episode,

this only works if somebody's open and

874

:

willing to share those pain points, open

and willing to see solutions and trying

875

:

things and knowing you may try something

and it doesn't work, but you keep

876

:

trying and you're very much not alone.

877

:

A lot of people have that embedded pain.

878

:

We've tried everything, nothing's worked.

879

:

And there's this giving up feeling,

but you were open to sharing this.

880

:

And I've heard a big

transformation in you.

881

:

And,, I'm appreciative that you

were willing to go along on the

882

:

ride and see where this ended up.

883

:

So you did the work.

884

:

I just gave ideas.

885

:

you did the work.

886

:

So kudos to you, mama, for wanting

things to go smoother and it

887

:

goes back to our whole point.

888

:

Principle with home CEO is it's so easy

to overlook and say, it's just food.

889

:

It's just meals, but this 1 percent

change in the ease of food of

890

:

your family is going to radiate

into your day and their days.

891

:

And that's the importance of this.

892

:

Theresa: I think it's a little more than

1 percent on this topic in my household.

893

:

big smile about it, a joy, a big joy.

894

:

Thank you, Sarah.

895

:

Thank you, Lacey, for

896

:

helping me with this and

897

:

making it fun.

898

:

Mhm.

899

:

Sara: Oh, I almost don't want

to say goodbye to Teresa.

900

:

I know I'm not, but I've had so

much fun having the scheduled time

901

:

with her and editing and getting to

hear her voice on a regular basis.

902

:

oh, I'm excited for how much progress.

903

:

she made how much, not even progress,

but how much opportunity she saw.

904

:

Like she saw the possibility, which is the

first step is just seeing what's possible.

905

:

And she jumped two feet in the deep

end, which is very much Teresa style.

906

:

And I hope, again, our hope is that

somebody listening caught one thing

907

:

that's going to be helpful to them.

908

:

It doesn't have to be the exact

same situation, different food

909

:

preferences, but one piece that

you can take home and resonate.

910

:

Lacey: Absolutely.

911

:

I took something away as we learned

last time about how to incorporate

912

:

the salad, not the salad drawer,

but the salad aspect into our home.

913

:

And yeah, I just, I love her energy

and the amount of work that she

914

:

put in is wonderful and fantastic.

915

:

And I'm so thankful that

she shared it with us.

916

:

Sara: Yes.

917

:

Thank you, Teresa.

918

:

Lacey: you.

919

:

Yeah, I'm going to cheat because

mine's really easy right now.

920

:

I am very grateful for my parents.

921

:

Sara: You cannot cheat.

922

:

Yes, you could.

923

:

I guess if you say exactly

what your neighbor says.

924

:

But then it's not really your gratitude.

925

:

You're just copying.

926

:

You cannot cheat at gratitude.

927

:

Lacey: I feel like I am constantly

talking about how lovely and wonderful

928

:

my parents are when it comes to helping

and supporting me, And what I've really

929

:

enjoyed is that lately they are just

like, we're going to do this for you.

930

:

And it's something I

would have never done.

931

:

And so it doesn't feel intrusive.

932

:

Cause they're like, we want to do this.

933

:

Is this good?

934

:

And I'm like, yeah, So not only are

they literally outside right now, power

935

:

washing my front porch and back porch.

936

:

We're going to go to Costco later.

937

:

but not only that, they connected that

my brother had a, riding lawnmower

938

:

that, was no longer working for them.

939

:

So they got a new one.

940

:

And, my parents then said, Hey, you

guys have a much bigger lawn now.

941

:

Would you like a riding lawnmower?

942

:

And.

943

:

Joe, we love Joe, but Joe, like

where I'm like jumping on something

944

:

immediately to make my life

easier, Joe takes a little while.

945

:

So if they didn't come to us with this,

we probably would have not gotten a

946

:

riding on mower for three to five years.

947

:

So not only did my parents bring it to

me, they actually replaced the battery.

948

:

The spark plugs did a oil change

for us and then brought it to us.

949

:

For Joe to be able to use

a riding lawnmower, on our

950

:

yard and it's just amazing.

951

:

I cannot express how wonderful

they are and how wonderful my

952

:

brother is for giving this to us.

953

:

I'm feeling the family love

and support today for sure.

954

:

Sara: Thank you, Bob and Carolyn.

955

:

What does your brother have to mow his

956

:

Lacey: He got a new mower.

957

:

Sara: Oh,

958

:

Lacey: So actually when this

first got introduced to us, my dad

959

:

said to Joe, Oh, Rob has a mower.

960

:

It caught on fire, but

it should be fine now.

961

:

To which I was like, What?

962

:

But apparently it was the battery and

they replaced the battery, so it shouldn't

963

:

worry about catching on fire anymore.

964

:

Sara: Stay tuned to find out if

Lacey's lawnmower catches on fire

965

:

Lacey: Who knows?

966

:

Who knows?

967

:

I will say, if there's anybody I trust in

a moment of crisis like that, it's Joe.

968

:

He usually is, does the

right thing, very quickly.

969

:

I'm not too worried.

970

:

Sara: husband and my husband

have a lot of similarities.

971

:

yeah, the one time when we were newly

married, a vacuum cleaner caught on fire.

972

:

And like a true dum dum, I run

upstairs to tell my husband

973

:

the vacuum cleaner's on fire.

974

:

I leave the thing that's on fire.

975

:

And I say, Oh, the vacuum

cleaner is on fire.

976

:

What do I do?

977

:

And he goes, put it outside

very calmly, actually.

978

:

And I go, but it's snowing outside.

979

:

And he goes, even better.

980

:

Lacey: It's so funny because my instant

reaction is put a blanket on it.

981

:

Maybe I can get it to go out.

982

:

Going outside didn't even occur to me.

983

:

Sara: Oh my gosh.

984

:

so glad you got a writing lawnmower.

985

:

And I gotta tell ya, it's pretty fun.

986

:

Lacey: I probably won't do it because

that's not a wise use of my energy,

987

:

but it makes Joe's time mowing the

lawn, like it cuts it in half, which

988

:

for us, it's actually really hard for

him to be able to mow the lawn because

989

:

he only has a certain amount of time.

990

:

And then weekends, I usually need a lot of

support from him with, He takes the kids,

991

:

and I do my best, but they're getting

better now that they're getting older.

992

:

They're a lot less, much.

993

:

best way possible.

994

:

they're just, they're three and

five, and when they were like

995

:

two and four, whew, it was a lot.

996

:

Sara: I shouldn't drink liquids when I'm

talking with Laci because I almost just

997

:

splurt coffee all over my equipment.

998

:

A bit much.

999

:

Lacey: so yeah, so it makes,

it really does make a big

:

00:53:30,385 --> 00:53:31,965

difference for us, for sure.

:

00:53:32,705 --> 00:53:34,895

Sara: and let's be honest, Bob and

Carolyn are probably going to show up

:

00:53:34,895 --> 00:53:36,335

and be like, can I mow your yard for you?

:

00:53:36,560 --> 00:53:39,390

Lacey: when we moved in,

they didn't mow our lawn.

:

00:53:39,400 --> 00:53:43,350

My dad was like, I called somebody

and they're coming to mow, because

:

00:53:43,350 --> 00:53:45,980

we didn't have time because we

were moving and all this stuff.

:

00:53:45,980 --> 00:53:50,630

So yeah, they, again, Bob

and Carolyn are the bomb

:

00:53:50,943 --> 00:53:54,403

Sara: I'm one step closer to moving

to Ohio from that story alone.

:

00:53:54,613 --> 00:53:57,383

it's only outweighed by

my dislike of moving.

:

00:53:58,123 --> 00:53:58,593

Okay.

:

00:53:58,803 --> 00:54:00,883

My gratitude.

:

00:54:01,623 --> 00:54:05,333

I mentioned on one of the last

podcasts about how I'm really

:

00:54:05,333 --> 00:54:11,773

focusing on balancing the three

buckets of work, home, and personal.

:

00:54:12,253 --> 00:54:15,313

And yesterday I could feel the imbalance.

:

00:54:15,363 --> 00:54:17,073

And so I called my neighbor.

:

00:54:17,603 --> 00:54:18,063

Let's be honest.

:

00:54:18,063 --> 00:54:19,173

I texted her.

:

00:54:19,173 --> 00:54:19,733

I didn't call.

:

00:54:19,913 --> 00:54:22,013

I texted her and I just said,

Hey, do you want to have a cup

:

00:54:22,013 --> 00:54:23,433

of tea before the kids get home?

:

00:54:24,173 --> 00:54:30,653

And we sat on her porch and her dog who

I have this like side relationship with.

:

00:54:30,703 --> 00:54:32,743

I love her dog so much.

:

00:54:32,943 --> 00:54:37,473

I just pet her dog for an hour and we just

sat on the porch and I drank a cup of tea.

:

00:54:37,953 --> 00:54:40,873

So my gratitude is that

I took time for myself.

:

00:54:40,903 --> 00:54:45,143

I could have very easily, I

could have very easily put.

:

00:54:45,513 --> 00:54:49,713

10 more chores in that hour, and I

just went, Nope, I'm doing this for me.

:

00:54:49,803 --> 00:54:52,383

And I'm really glad I did

because I ended up actually

:

00:54:52,383 --> 00:54:54,093

losing my shit later that night.

:

00:54:54,093 --> 00:54:58,203

And I would've lost it a lot earlier

had I not took that hour to myself.

:

00:54:58,943 --> 00:55:02,513

I had this complete

Jekyll and Hyde moment.

:

00:55:03,253 --> 00:55:07,573

Where I was just like, oh, I'm tired

and hungry and the day is over for me.

:

00:55:08,313 --> 00:55:11,373

I need to stop talking immediately

and put food in my mouth.

:

00:55:12,113 --> 00:55:15,143

Lacey: Well, kudos for you

for recognizing that as well.

:

00:55:15,883 --> 00:55:16,463

Sara: Thank you.

:

00:55:17,213 --> 00:55:19,553

Lacey: I love that you did that, Sarah.

:

00:55:19,583 --> 00:55:25,083

I love that you took time for yourself

because I know how much you give me, and

:

00:55:25,083 --> 00:55:28,003

I don't live in the same state as you, so,

:

00:55:28,070 --> 00:55:31,740

Sara: Oh, well, I want

to normalize, two things.

:

00:55:32,120 --> 00:55:32,840

Part of the movement.

:

00:55:32,850 --> 00:55:36,180

One is normalizing Not judging

your own home, which means also

:

00:55:36,180 --> 00:55:37,610

not judging other people's homes.

:

00:55:37,660 --> 00:55:40,600

Let's remove that vocabularity

of I'm so embarrassed.

:

00:55:40,600 --> 00:55:41,400

I'm so ashamed.

:

00:55:41,400 --> 00:55:42,120

I'm so whatever.

:

00:55:42,140 --> 00:55:43,950

Let's just, it is what it is.

:

00:55:44,390 --> 00:55:48,470

And then I also just want to normalize

there's no guilt and shame in sitting

:

00:55:48,470 --> 00:55:50,180

down for an hour and having a cup of tea.

:

00:55:50,210 --> 00:55:53,550

I want to normalize, I'm doing this.

:

00:55:53,840 --> 00:55:55,610

It actually came from one of your posts.

:

00:55:55,620 --> 00:55:57,290

You had a post about active rest.

:

00:55:57,300 --> 00:55:58,060

Do you remember that?

:

00:55:58,165 --> 00:55:59,455

Lacey: Rest is an action.

:

00:55:59,730 --> 00:56:03,300

my therapist taught me that, and

I have to keep reminding myself.

:

00:56:03,955 --> 00:56:06,305

Sara: So I actually did it on Sunday.

:

00:56:07,045 --> 00:56:08,545

I did that intentionally.

:

00:56:08,785 --> 00:56:11,655

And I, the whole time I had to

be like, I'm not being lazy.

:

00:56:11,875 --> 00:56:14,045

This is something I need to do, right?

:

00:56:14,075 --> 00:56:16,435

And so I want to normalize that.

:

00:56:17,010 --> 00:56:18,360

That rest is an action.

:

00:56:18,400 --> 00:56:21,240

that is just as important

as all the other things.

:

00:56:21,980 --> 00:56:24,500

And there's no judgment

because it's important.

:

00:56:24,570 --> 00:56:28,570

So let's all do it and let's stop judging

ourselves and let's stop judging others

:

00:56:28,580 --> 00:56:30,560

and let's make the world a happier place.

:

00:56:31,300 --> 00:56:31,540

The

:

00:56:31,710 --> 00:56:32,660

Lacey: Amen.

:

00:56:33,400 --> 00:56:37,870

Also, if we normalize it for other

people, it makes people like me,

:

00:56:37,880 --> 00:56:41,240

who are sick, not beat themselves so

much when they have to do it, too.

:

00:56:41,260 --> 00:56:44,670

So, win win for everyone.

:

00:56:45,370 --> 00:56:46,310

Sara: Win, win, win.

:

00:56:46,390 --> 00:56:48,550

Join us on the win train.

:

00:56:49,110 --> 00:56:51,770

Lacey: I can't believe that

next week we have our final

:

00:56:51,780 --> 00:56:53,640

participant podcast with Tyra.

:

00:56:54,380 --> 00:56:56,320

Sara: It's been a fun train

:

00:56:56,530 --> 00:56:59,110

Lacey: Season two has been a blast.

:

00:56:59,850 --> 00:57:00,020

A

:

00:57:00,250 --> 00:57:04,030

Sara: And reminder to

listeners, we are casting for.

:

00:57:04,480 --> 00:57:05,200

Season three.

:

00:57:05,440 --> 00:57:10,200

So if you enjoy the work, if you enjoy

the process, and if you're willing

:

00:57:10,200 --> 00:57:13,880

to help be part of this movement

and put your story out there, you've

:

00:57:13,880 --> 00:57:15,240

heard we're pretty nice people.

:

00:57:15,390 --> 00:57:16,480

We're not scary or mean.

:

00:57:16,890 --> 00:57:18,420

I actually, I take that back.

:

00:57:18,430 --> 00:57:20,970

When I got really tired and

hungry, I was pretty mean, but

:

00:57:20,970 --> 00:57:22,030

that was the end of the day.

:

00:57:22,770 --> 00:57:24,120

I'm usually pretty good.

:

00:57:24,260 --> 00:57:25,320

Before two o'clock.

:

00:57:25,520 --> 00:57:28,560

Lacey: well, I just think

we're lovely personally and in

:

00:57:28,780 --> 00:57:29,120

Sara: do too.

:

00:57:29,860 --> 00:57:30,890

Lacey: But that's a good reminder.

:

00:57:30,920 --> 00:57:36,200

I will get the, sign up for season

three on the website and you can

:

00:57:36,200 --> 00:57:37,903

head to JoyfulSupportMovement.

:

00:57:37,933 --> 00:57:42,933

com and sign up to potentially be

a participant in season three, and

:

00:57:42,933 --> 00:57:45,173

you can get the magic of Sarah.

:

00:57:45,223 --> 00:57:46,023

Sara: And Lacey.

:

00:57:46,763 --> 00:57:49,063

Lacey: Yes, but, Sarah,

:

00:57:49,609 --> 00:57:53,569

Sara: I couldn't, we saw, we can't, Sarah

Head doesn't have the magic by herself.

:

00:57:53,569 --> 00:57:56,309

We saw that when I tried

to do Home CEO by myself.

:

00:57:56,359 --> 00:57:58,319

And you were like, eh,

it feels a little flat.

:

00:57:58,369 --> 00:57:58,839

And I'm like, yeah.

:

00:57:59,449 --> 00:58:02,079

And then we did it together and

I was like, there's the magic.

:

00:58:02,169 --> 00:58:03,949

It's the two of us together.

:

00:58:04,359 --> 00:58:06,489

Me by myself, I'm very stern.

:

00:58:06,489 --> 00:58:06,769

And.

:

00:58:07,369 --> 00:58:09,209

Yeah, no, it's the two of us together.

:

00:58:09,384 --> 00:58:13,594

Lacey: overthink a little bit, yes, I,

I do lighten you up a little bit, which,

:

00:58:14,169 --> 00:58:16,079

Sara: I like how you said

a little bit, like you were

:

00:58:16,079 --> 00:58:17,759

trying to like cushion the blow.

:

00:58:18,459 --> 00:58:19,849

No, I overthink a lot.

:

00:58:19,869 --> 00:58:20,489

It's okay.

:

00:58:21,229 --> 00:58:23,989

Lacey: all right, until

next week, thanks, Sarah.

:

00:58:24,729 --> 00:58:25,949

Sara: Thank you, Lacey.

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